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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,253 --> 00:00:04,535 YASMINE: You're wrong. 2 00:00:04,713 --> 00:00:07,252 RICHARD: No, you're wrong. 3 00:00:08,091 --> 00:00:10,085 Look, I'm not gonna argue with a little girl. 4 00:00:10,260 --> 00:00:11,803 Why? Afraid you're wrong? 5 00:00:11,970 --> 00:00:15,138 And by the way, I'm a young woman, not a little girl. 6 00:00:15,307 --> 00:00:17,597 I beg your pardon, a young woman. 7 00:00:17,768 --> 00:00:20,971 - But I'm still not wrong. YASMINE: Well, I think you are. 8 00:00:21,146 --> 00:00:23,638 We've been around aeons longer than your team. 9 00:00:23,815 --> 00:00:26,189 Yet we have more spirit than you do. 10 00:00:26,360 --> 00:00:28,934 When we play, we play to win, but we play bigtime. 11 00:00:29,112 --> 00:00:32,447 You may play to win, but we actually do win, a lot. 12 00:00:32,616 --> 00:00:35,238 Face it, most of the time we are the champions. 13 00:00:35,410 --> 00:00:36,574 All right, look, number one: 14 00:00:36,745 --> 00:00:42,251 You're a little too young for me to talk to you about 1969 or 1986, 15 00:00:42,417 --> 00:00:44,874 so I'm not gonna bore you with the facts. 16 00:00:45,045 --> 00:00:46,457 And number two: 17 00:00:46,630 --> 00:00:48,209 We might have been the loveable losers, 18 00:00:48,382 --> 00:00:50,874 but now, we are formidable foes. 19 00:00:51,051 --> 00:00:52,879 Hey, stop. 20 00:00:53,053 --> 00:00:55,545 Who's the better team, the Yankees or the Mets? 21 00:00:55,722 --> 00:00:57,846 - The Mets. - Yankees. 22 00:00:58,016 --> 00:01:01,766 That's what you're arguing about? Baseball? 23 00:01:01,937 --> 00:01:03,847 What'd you think we were arguing about? 24 00:01:04,022 --> 00:01:05,399 I don't know. 25 00:01:05,566 --> 00:01:06,847 Yankees or Mets? 26 00:01:07,860 --> 00:01:10,067 I have to go now. 27 00:01:10,237 --> 00:01:11,269 Now, so where were we? 28 00:01:11,446 --> 00:01:13,239 I believe you were boring me. 29 00:01:13,407 --> 00:01:15,068 Oh, really? I'll tell you something else. 30 00:01:15,242 --> 00:01:17,911 Anything about the Mets versus the Yankees is the Mets. 31 00:01:18,078 --> 00:01:19,242 Even the bobbleheads. 32 00:01:19,413 --> 00:01:22,865 Ever see Derek Jeter's bobblehead versus like... 33 00:02:49,586 --> 00:02:51,461 [SIGHS] 34 00:03:03,559 --> 00:03:05,386 I'm sorry, Eric. 35 00:03:05,561 --> 00:03:07,139 If you don't wanna eat, you don't eat. 36 00:03:07,312 --> 00:03:09,686 No, no, no. I'm sorry that I haven't taken the time 37 00:03:09,857 --> 00:03:13,476 to get over here sooner and see how you were doing. 38 00:03:13,652 --> 00:03:15,112 - It's okay. - Hey, it really isn't. 39 00:03:15,279 --> 00:03:17,605 I really should have made the time to come over here. 40 00:03:17,781 --> 00:03:18,813 Not that it was easy. 41 00:03:18,991 --> 00:03:22,111 I mean, you know, conducting services at your church. 42 00:03:22,286 --> 00:03:26,154 And not to mention, you know, taking care of my own flock. 43 00:03:26,540 --> 00:03:29,661 Flock. Now that's a word I picked up at church, huh? 44 00:03:29,835 --> 00:03:31,710 Flock. 45 00:03:31,879 --> 00:03:33,872 A cool word: flock. 46 00:03:34,047 --> 00:03:37,133 Seriously, I'm sorry. I really am. 47 00:03:37,342 --> 00:03:41,127 I mean, let's face it, you're sick. Look at you. 48 00:03:41,305 --> 00:03:44,260 I mean-- And I don't mean it that way. I mean you-- You-- 49 00:03:44,433 --> 00:03:48,478 What I really meant was that you were sick and now you're all well. 50 00:03:49,188 --> 00:03:51,893 I mean, you're not all well, but you look incredible. 51 00:03:52,065 --> 00:03:53,609 I mean, you really do. 52 00:03:53,775 --> 00:03:56,065 For a guy who had a double bypass? 53 00:03:56,236 --> 00:03:59,072 You know what it looks like? Looks like you only had a single bypass. 54 00:03:59,239 --> 00:04:00,782 Thank you. 55 00:04:00,949 --> 00:04:02,575 - Can I ask you a question? - Yeah. 56 00:04:02,743 --> 00:04:04,571 Did it hurt? 57 00:04:04,745 --> 00:04:05,860 Oh, a little. 58 00:04:06,038 --> 00:04:07,153 Wow. Yeah. 59 00:04:07,331 --> 00:04:10,783 But, you know, you're gonna-- You're gonna be okay now, right? 60 00:04:10,959 --> 00:04:12,834 - Yeah. - Oh, good. Good. That's great. 61 00:04:13,003 --> 00:04:15,044 So I don't have to cover for you this Sunday? 62 00:04:15,672 --> 00:04:17,713 The church hired a replacement. 63 00:04:18,634 --> 00:04:19,666 Really? 64 00:04:20,344 --> 00:04:22,800 You know, I really wish if they didn't like what I was doing 65 00:04:22,971 --> 00:04:25,261 that you could have at least, you know, told me. 66 00:04:25,474 --> 00:04:26,506 Can I tell you something? 67 00:04:26,683 --> 00:04:29,436 I really thought I was really doing a good job 68 00:04:29,603 --> 00:04:31,929 and that the people really liked my work. 69 00:04:32,105 --> 00:04:38,026 Boy, it's unbelievable how that flock can just turn on their shepherd, huh? 70 00:04:38,445 --> 00:04:44,200 Well, fine. Phooey on the flock. Pbbt! You know, I'll tell you something else. 71 00:04:44,368 --> 00:04:47,286 You know, I think I'm gonna stick with my own flock from now on. 72 00:04:47,496 --> 00:04:49,620 You've been replaced as my replacement 73 00:04:49,790 --> 00:04:51,582 because I've been replaced. 74 00:04:51,750 --> 00:04:53,660 Only, they-- They don't call it "replaced." 75 00:04:53,877 --> 00:04:56,286 They call it "help." 76 00:04:56,672 --> 00:05:02,047 The church has hired an associate pastor to "help" me 77 00:05:02,219 --> 00:05:05,174 and he'll be speaking on Sundays until I return. 78 00:05:05,347 --> 00:05:07,341 That's what they're telling me anyway. 79 00:05:07,558 --> 00:05:10,180 - Did you know about this? - No, I did not. 80 00:05:10,352 --> 00:05:12,393 I surely didn't notice anyone new. 81 00:05:12,563 --> 00:05:15,351 Of course, you know, everyone's new to me. 82 00:05:15,566 --> 00:05:17,773 He had the audacity to sit with my family. 83 00:05:17,943 --> 00:05:21,942 You didn't notice anyone new in my family? 84 00:05:22,114 --> 00:05:24,736 You have a very large family. 85 00:05:24,908 --> 00:05:27,068 And I was really very busy. 86 00:05:27,244 --> 00:05:30,578 And I was trying very hard, you know, to, you know-- 87 00:05:30,747 --> 00:05:31,993 To come through for you. 88 00:05:34,042 --> 00:05:37,626 And yet, you know, it's hard for me to shake the notion 89 00:05:37,796 --> 00:05:41,795 that this really has everything to do with me. 90 00:05:41,967 --> 00:05:45,467 You know, if I hadn't tried to get everybody out ten minutes early 91 00:05:45,637 --> 00:05:49,007 so they can be first in line at that cafeteria down the block. 92 00:05:49,516 --> 00:05:50,976 That was a mistake. You know why? 93 00:05:51,143 --> 00:05:53,635 If I had that ten minutes back, you know what I could've done? 94 00:05:53,812 --> 00:05:57,645 I could have made sure that every one of those people 95 00:05:57,816 --> 00:06:01,067 were drenched in the blood from the lamb. 96 00:06:02,070 --> 00:06:06,947 You know just-- I just-- What exactly is the blood from a lamb? 97 00:06:07,117 --> 00:06:12,076 I mean, it just sounds so gory to me. I just say it and I feel queasy. 98 00:06:12,247 --> 00:06:13,446 It's Jesus. 99 00:06:13,624 --> 00:06:16,080 Oh, I'm sorry. He's wonderful. 100 00:06:16,251 --> 00:06:18,957 And it's a metaphor. It has nothing to do with you. 101 00:06:19,129 --> 00:06:22,464 Not that Jesus doesn't have something to do with you 102 00:06:22,633 --> 00:06:28,090 but my getting "helped" has nothing to do with you. 103 00:06:28,263 --> 00:06:30,340 You know something? I'd like to meet this guy. 104 00:06:30,557 --> 00:06:32,432 Maybe you should meet this guy. 105 00:06:33,060 --> 00:06:38,565 Or even better, maybe you should not meet this guy. Maybe, uh... 106 00:06:39,650 --> 00:06:40,765 [ERIC LAUGHS] 107 00:06:40,943 --> 00:06:42,189 This is good. 108 00:06:42,361 --> 00:06:47,273 Maybe, uh, we go down to the church and just check on him. 109 00:06:47,491 --> 00:06:49,734 What do you mean, like spy on him? 110 00:06:50,327 --> 00:06:53,033 Yes. Spy on him, you and me. 111 00:06:53,205 --> 00:06:54,486 Like Starsky and Hutch. 112 00:06:55,582 --> 00:06:56,912 Well, let me tell you something. 113 00:06:57,084 --> 00:07:00,002 First of all, uh, Hutch never had a double bypass. 114 00:07:00,170 --> 00:07:03,208 And trust me, Starsky never had heartburn 115 00:07:03,382 --> 00:07:05,672 like I have right now, believe me. 116 00:07:05,843 --> 00:07:08,169 I don't think it's a good idea for either one of us to go, 117 00:07:08,345 --> 00:07:10,671 you know, anywhere in the condition we're in, by the way. 118 00:07:10,848 --> 00:07:14,348 - You have to drive. - Oh, no, no, no. What, me? 119 00:07:14,518 --> 00:07:17,057 - Well... - I understand, but I don't wanna drive. 120 00:07:17,229 --> 00:07:18,724 I mean, it's always the guy who drives 121 00:07:18,897 --> 00:07:20,974 who gets arrested in situations like this. 122 00:07:21,149 --> 00:07:24,270 It's not a situation. It's just... 123 00:07:24,444 --> 00:07:26,604 Even if we do, I have connections at the police force. 124 00:07:26,780 --> 00:07:28,359 "Even if we do"? 125 00:07:29,533 --> 00:07:32,570 So you're going on a ride-along with Kevin and Roxanne? 126 00:07:33,078 --> 00:07:34,573 Why does that make you so happy? 127 00:07:34,746 --> 00:07:37,998 It took me months to talk Kevin into it, so I know why I'm happy. 128 00:07:38,166 --> 00:07:40,493 - Why are you happy? You're not going. - I don't wanna go. 129 00:07:40,669 --> 00:07:41,868 I have to go to the library. 130 00:07:42,045 --> 00:07:44,253 I think it's great for you to spend time with Kevin. 131 00:07:44,423 --> 00:07:46,749 It's good for you to have a positive male figure. 132 00:07:47,176 --> 00:07:49,881 - You want information on Roxanne. - I'll pay you. 133 00:07:50,053 --> 00:07:52,177 I wanna know if she gets any personal calls on duty, 134 00:07:52,347 --> 00:07:54,804 who she's dating, who she was dating, who she wants to date, 135 00:07:54,975 --> 00:07:57,467 if she's been engaged, where she lives, what she likes to eat, 136 00:07:57,644 --> 00:08:00,053 - and if she likes board games. - Board games? 137 00:08:00,230 --> 00:08:02,140 People who play board games are family people. 138 00:08:02,316 --> 00:08:04,772 People who don't play board games aren't family people. 139 00:08:04,943 --> 00:08:05,976 Family people? 140 00:08:06,153 --> 00:08:07,731 You're either family or single people. 141 00:08:07,905 --> 00:08:10,776 Family people wanna live in families, single people wanna live alone. 142 00:08:10,949 --> 00:08:12,528 So there are only two kinds of people? 143 00:08:12,701 --> 00:08:14,529 I don't know. I haven't thought that through. 144 00:08:14,703 --> 00:08:16,862 Just find out stuff. Whatever you can. 145 00:08:21,251 --> 00:08:22,415 Maybe you're having problems 146 00:08:22,586 --> 00:08:25,754 because you're too young to have a boyfriend. 147 00:08:25,923 --> 00:08:29,791 Maybe, but I really want a boyfriend. It makes me feel grown-up. 148 00:08:29,968 --> 00:08:32,128 But you're not grown-up. 149 00:08:32,596 --> 00:08:34,755 Yes, but I am growing up. 150 00:08:34,932 --> 00:08:36,510 Maybe my boyfriend knows a boy for you. 151 00:08:36,683 --> 00:08:38,392 No, no, no. I'm too young. 152 00:08:38,560 --> 00:08:40,186 I'm not interested in boys. 153 00:08:40,354 --> 00:08:41,813 Even if it's a Muslim guy? 154 00:08:41,980 --> 00:08:46,145 When I get older, they are plenty of social functions at the mosque I go to. 155 00:08:46,318 --> 00:08:49,439 I can meet a guy there. A guy who I have something in common with. 156 00:08:49,613 --> 00:08:53,778 A guy whose parents will know my parents. A safe guy. A good guy. 157 00:08:53,951 --> 00:08:56,028 And by then, I'll know more about who I am 158 00:08:56,203 --> 00:08:58,113 and what I want in a husband. 159 00:08:58,288 --> 00:08:59,321 A husband? 160 00:08:59,498 --> 00:09:02,784 Well, isn't that why you date, to find a husband? 161 00:09:02,960 --> 00:09:05,368 Well, I'm not really looking for a husband. 162 00:09:05,546 --> 00:09:06,922 I just want a boyfriend. 163 00:09:07,089 --> 00:09:10,007 To have a boyfriend. To be like everyone else. 164 00:09:10,175 --> 00:09:12,299 I don't know any other 12-year-olds with boyfriends. 165 00:09:12,469 --> 00:09:14,712 Are you sure everyone has a boyfriend? 166 00:09:14,888 --> 00:09:17,345 No, but I still want one. 167 00:09:19,768 --> 00:09:21,809 Okay, forget boys. 168 00:09:21,979 --> 00:09:25,182 Lucy is going to the library, so maybe we could do makeovers. 169 00:09:25,357 --> 00:09:28,312 - Makeover? - You can wear makeup, can't you? 170 00:09:28,777 --> 00:09:30,652 I'm not really allowed to wear makeup. 171 00:09:30,821 --> 00:09:33,906 Not that that's the issue. I don't feel the need to wear it. 172 00:09:34,074 --> 00:09:37,526 Hello? I'm 12. I actually like my face. 173 00:09:37,703 --> 00:09:39,780 Okay. Do you have to wear the hijab? 174 00:09:39,955 --> 00:09:41,996 Maybe we could do something with your hair. 175 00:09:42,165 --> 00:09:43,577 Ruthie, my beauty is my privacy. 176 00:09:43,750 --> 00:09:45,459 I don't want everyone to see my beauty. 177 00:09:45,627 --> 00:09:47,751 I want to save that for my husband. 178 00:09:47,921 --> 00:09:50,294 I'm sorry. I hope I didn't offend you. 179 00:09:50,465 --> 00:09:52,874 Not at all. We're just getting to know each other. 180 00:09:53,051 --> 00:09:55,128 [PHONE RINGING] 181 00:09:57,848 --> 00:09:59,640 - Hello? - Hi, Ruthie, it's Jake. 182 00:09:59,808 --> 00:10:00,840 Can I come over? 183 00:10:01,476 --> 00:10:03,766 - It's Jake. He wants to come over. - It's okay. 184 00:10:03,937 --> 00:10:05,183 I'll just go home. 185 00:10:06,732 --> 00:10:08,939 Sorry, Jake, but I already have Yasmine over. 186 00:10:09,109 --> 00:10:11,435 It's okay. I have to go home soon anyway. 187 00:10:12,654 --> 00:10:14,778 I would really like to see you, Ruthie. 188 00:10:14,948 --> 00:10:15,981 Maybe later. 189 00:10:16,158 --> 00:10:17,783 Right now, I'm hanging out with Yasmine. 190 00:10:17,951 --> 00:10:20,159 [OVER PHONE] I have to watch David and Sam for my mom 191 00:10:20,329 --> 00:10:21,409 when she leaves for PTA. 192 00:10:21,622 --> 00:10:24,161 Sorry, busy. Bye. 193 00:10:27,044 --> 00:10:29,037 Look who's here. 194 00:10:30,339 --> 00:10:32,831 - I'm Sam. - I'm David. 195 00:10:33,008 --> 00:10:35,547 We knew that. Has Mom left? 196 00:10:37,638 --> 00:10:39,466 You need a plan. 197 00:10:39,640 --> 00:10:40,921 - We have a plan. - No, no. 198 00:10:41,099 --> 00:10:44,552 We're driving down to the church to spy on this new guy. 199 00:10:44,728 --> 00:10:45,892 That's not a plan. 200 00:10:46,063 --> 00:10:48,851 [STAMMERING] That's more like a caper. 201 00:10:49,024 --> 00:10:50,436 It's high jinks. 202 00:10:50,609 --> 00:10:52,484 It's, uh-- It's an escapade. 203 00:10:52,653 --> 00:10:54,029 What's an escapade? 204 00:10:55,364 --> 00:10:56,396 An Escalade. 205 00:10:56,907 --> 00:10:59,066 I want one of those Escalades. Oh, those cars. 206 00:10:59,243 --> 00:11:01,485 Did you ever see those beauties? A black one. Ooh. 207 00:11:01,662 --> 00:11:03,655 Well, I'm off to my PTA meeting. 208 00:11:03,830 --> 00:11:06,073 Oh, uh, just so you know, so you don't think 209 00:11:06,250 --> 00:11:08,160 I'm getting well behind your back or anything. 210 00:11:08,335 --> 00:11:11,835 Richard has offered to take me out for a drive. 211 00:11:12,005 --> 00:11:14,248 - Where? - To the park. 212 00:11:14,424 --> 00:11:16,999 - What park? - The one with the ducks. Where else? 213 00:11:17,177 --> 00:11:20,428 I figured we'd go down, we'd talk, be one with nature, feed-- 214 00:11:20,597 --> 00:11:23,267 We could feed the ducks and if we get a little lucky, 215 00:11:23,433 --> 00:11:24,633 maybe a swan or two. 216 00:11:24,810 --> 00:11:27,563 Although they-- Ever see them--? They peck when they get anxious. 217 00:11:27,729 --> 00:11:30,304 Ruthie and a friend are watching the boys. 218 00:11:30,482 --> 00:11:31,859 But Yasmine is leaving soon, 219 00:11:32,025 --> 00:11:34,185 so I was sort counting on Eric as a backup. 220 00:11:34,361 --> 00:11:36,853 Well, Ruthie's watched them on her own before 221 00:11:37,030 --> 00:11:38,691 and it'll just be for a few minutes. 222 00:11:38,866 --> 00:11:42,152 - All right, I suppose it's okay. - Yeah. 223 00:11:43,245 --> 00:11:45,120 You two aren't up to something? Ha, ha. 224 00:11:45,289 --> 00:11:46,950 Well, I know you're not up to something 225 00:11:47,124 --> 00:11:49,960 because Eric is recovering from heart surgery. 226 00:11:53,297 --> 00:11:56,215 - Bye, Richard. RICHARD: Bye-bye. 227 00:11:56,717 --> 00:11:58,426 [DOOR OPENS THEN CLOSES] 228 00:11:58,594 --> 00:12:02,295 Now that's what you call a veiled threat. 229 00:12:02,472 --> 00:12:04,098 - Yes. - Really, because I'm not used to 230 00:12:04,266 --> 00:12:06,260 getting threats like that. My wife comes right out 231 00:12:06,435 --> 00:12:10,350 and tells me exactly what she's gonna do to me. 232 00:12:10,981 --> 00:12:14,814 Actually, she usually, uh, tells me what she won't do to me 233 00:12:14,985 --> 00:12:18,236 is, you know, what the real threat is. 234 00:12:18,405 --> 00:12:21,526 It's the deal. I'm just curious, what do you think Annie will do 235 00:12:21,700 --> 00:12:25,402 if she actually catches us, you know, spying on this guy? 236 00:12:25,579 --> 00:12:29,578 Well, her options are more limited than your wife's, uh-- 237 00:12:29,750 --> 00:12:32,123 I just had heart surgery, so... 238 00:12:32,294 --> 00:12:33,670 Silly Rabbi. I'm sorry. 239 00:12:33,837 --> 00:12:37,338 Because you have the-- You can't do everything at once-- Yeah. 240 00:12:37,508 --> 00:12:40,759 So in other words, you guys can't--? Like if you--? 241 00:12:40,928 --> 00:12:42,755 - No. - Don't get caught, right? 242 00:12:42,930 --> 00:12:44,129 Oh. 243 00:12:44,306 --> 00:12:46,430 Sorry, I'm just, uh-- So, what's the plan? Uh... 244 00:12:46,975 --> 00:12:49,052 The plan is, I'm gonna get this guy if it kills me. 245 00:12:49,228 --> 00:12:51,850 Sounds like Bush's plan and that's not working very well. 246 00:12:52,022 --> 00:12:53,186 I-- I suggest that we maybe 247 00:12:53,357 --> 00:12:56,275 try to come up with something a little better. 248 00:12:56,777 --> 00:12:57,809 Well... 249 00:13:00,113 --> 00:13:01,277 Oh. 250 00:13:01,448 --> 00:13:04,154 I have to run out for a few hours, PTA meeting. 251 00:13:04,326 --> 00:13:08,241 Eric's up to something. I tried to threaten him, but you threaten him. 252 00:13:08,455 --> 00:13:10,116 And, uh, keep an eye on Ruthie and Yasmine 253 00:13:10,290 --> 00:13:12,580 who are keeping an eye on the twins. Can you do that? 254 00:13:13,001 --> 00:13:15,410 - I don't know if I can do that. - Are you up to something? 255 00:13:16,004 --> 00:13:17,334 - Yeah. - Threaten Eric anyway. 256 00:13:17,506 --> 00:13:21,374 You know, his life may depend upon it. Oh, and behave yourself. 257 00:13:21,927 --> 00:13:24,336 I know what his life depends on. 258 00:13:25,472 --> 00:13:26,504 [DOOR OPENS] 259 00:13:28,016 --> 00:13:29,428 [SIGHS] 260 00:13:30,561 --> 00:13:32,353 Reverend, uh, Rabbi. 261 00:13:32,938 --> 00:13:36,688 Mrs. Camden said that I should threaten you, so here it is. 262 00:13:38,610 --> 00:13:40,355 I can't threaten you. 263 00:13:40,529 --> 00:13:43,317 And I can't watch Ruthie and Yasmine watch the boys either. 264 00:13:43,490 --> 00:13:46,278 I have something. 265 00:13:46,451 --> 00:13:48,112 Yeah, bye. 266 00:13:49,538 --> 00:13:52,493 This is a very hostile home. 267 00:13:52,666 --> 00:13:53,995 [SHUDDERS] 268 00:13:54,168 --> 00:13:57,169 No wonder you have heart problems. Man. 269 00:13:57,588 --> 00:13:59,332 KEVIN: Just throw out a couple of things. 270 00:13:59,506 --> 00:14:02,212 Like you have a boyfriend and the two of you love board games. 271 00:14:02,384 --> 00:14:04,508 - Why? - Because if Lucy thinks 272 00:14:04,678 --> 00:14:06,719 you and your boyfriend are playing board games, 273 00:14:06,889 --> 00:14:08,633 then the two of you are both family people. 274 00:14:08,807 --> 00:14:11,595 And that means you'll be getting married and leaving me alone. 275 00:14:11,768 --> 00:14:15,304 But I don't have a boyfriend, so that would be telling a lie. 276 00:14:15,480 --> 00:14:18,648 A lie that's not only fun, but a lie that serves me. 277 00:14:18,817 --> 00:14:20,360 You know what'd be more fun? 278 00:14:20,527 --> 00:14:24,229 If I say I have no boyfriend, and I want you as a boyfriend 279 00:14:24,406 --> 00:14:26,863 and the two of us play board games every night. 280 00:14:27,034 --> 00:14:30,201 No. That wouldn't be more fun, that would be less fun. 281 00:14:30,913 --> 00:14:32,194 You asked me to lie. 282 00:14:32,372 --> 00:14:33,405 [FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING] 283 00:14:33,582 --> 00:14:35,540 - Forget it. - Too late. 284 00:14:36,418 --> 00:14:38,875 Hey, Luce, I was just about to come inside 285 00:14:39,046 --> 00:14:41,336 and see if you have any kind of games we can borrow. 286 00:14:41,507 --> 00:14:44,343 In case we're stuck in the car for lots of hours with nothing to do. 287 00:14:44,510 --> 00:14:46,384 I don't want Simon to get bored. 288 00:14:46,553 --> 00:14:50,255 And since I love board games and Kevin hates board games 289 00:14:50,432 --> 00:14:52,260 it'll give me someone to play with. 290 00:14:52,434 --> 00:14:54,143 Since when do you hate board games? 291 00:14:54,311 --> 00:14:57,930 I don't. I just hate playing them with anyone but you. 292 00:14:58,148 --> 00:14:59,180 [CHUCKLES] 293 00:15:04,530 --> 00:15:06,025 What are you gonna do this afternoon? 294 00:15:06,198 --> 00:15:09,200 I have to go to the library and do some research. 295 00:15:10,244 --> 00:15:12,237 - Call me when you get home. - Okay. 296 00:15:12,412 --> 00:15:13,956 Bye. 297 00:15:14,331 --> 00:15:15,791 Bye. 298 00:15:19,586 --> 00:15:22,078 Okay, Cagney and Lacey, let's move this cruiser. 299 00:15:22,256 --> 00:15:24,380 Are you calling me Cagney or Lacey? 300 00:15:24,800 --> 00:15:25,963 Sorry. 301 00:15:28,095 --> 00:15:29,923 Behave yourself. 302 00:15:30,097 --> 00:15:31,806 Behave myself? 303 00:15:31,974 --> 00:15:34,929 You are gonna pay for that, Kinkirk. 304 00:15:41,024 --> 00:15:42,603 ERIC: Hey, girls. 305 00:15:42,776 --> 00:15:46,360 Ruthie, uh, I know Yasmine is leaving, but I need to go out. 306 00:15:46,530 --> 00:15:48,773 - Are you okay with the boys? - It's not the first time 307 00:15:48,949 --> 00:15:50,859 - I've been alone with Sam and David. - I know. 308 00:15:51,034 --> 00:15:52,993 And you've always been very responsible. 309 00:15:53,161 --> 00:15:55,321 - Bye. - Bye. 310 00:15:55,497 --> 00:15:56,613 Okay. Goodbye. 311 00:16:02,045 --> 00:16:03,161 [ROBBIE SIGHS] 312 00:16:04,673 --> 00:16:06,382 Hey, where you going? 313 00:16:06,758 --> 00:16:07,874 Nowhere, really. 314 00:16:08,051 --> 00:16:09,844 Uh, where are you going? 315 00:16:11,305 --> 00:16:12,420 Nowhere, really. 316 00:16:41,001 --> 00:16:44,667 There appears to be no one home. 317 00:16:45,589 --> 00:16:46,621 CHANDLER: Reverend Camden? 318 00:16:46,798 --> 00:16:47,998 [RICHARD GASPS THEN SIGHS] 319 00:16:48,175 --> 00:16:51,426 I didn't see you there, here, in my office. 320 00:16:51,595 --> 00:16:54,965 I just came in here to find a Strunk and White. 321 00:16:55,140 --> 00:16:56,968 Evidently, there aren't enough years in school 322 00:16:57,142 --> 00:17:00,228 to cover the difference between "further" and "farther." Ha, ha. 323 00:17:00,395 --> 00:17:02,354 We really enjoyed your sermon last week. 324 00:17:02,523 --> 00:17:05,394 So few Protestants get the opportunity to learn about kosher laws. 325 00:17:06,193 --> 00:17:07,225 Thanks. 326 00:17:08,695 --> 00:17:09,728 We should be going, huh? 327 00:17:09,905 --> 00:17:12,314 How's your sermon coming along? 328 00:17:12,491 --> 00:17:13,737 CHANDLER: I could use some help, 329 00:17:13,909 --> 00:17:16,448 but I was trying to let you enjoy your time off. 330 00:17:16,620 --> 00:17:18,910 ERIC: I don't wanna pressure you, but just so you know, 331 00:17:19,081 --> 00:17:21,537 they always remember the first one. 332 00:17:21,708 --> 00:17:24,165 The first one is everything. 333 00:17:24,336 --> 00:17:28,251 I mean, come Sunday, it's judgement day. 334 00:17:29,049 --> 00:17:33,178 And that's one tough flock you're speaking to. 335 00:17:34,346 --> 00:17:37,182 Would either of you care to read my sermon? 336 00:17:37,349 --> 00:17:40,185 Maybe give me some notes? I'd really appreciate it. 337 00:17:40,352 --> 00:17:42,262 - Oh, sure. - Yeah, we'd love to read it. 338 00:17:42,437 --> 00:17:45,356 Great. I'll be right back. I'm just using Lou's office. 339 00:17:49,862 --> 00:17:51,571 [ERIC CLEARS THROAT] 340 00:17:51,738 --> 00:17:52,771 Kosher laws? 341 00:17:52,948 --> 00:17:54,858 Hey, go easy on me. They're very interesting. 342 00:17:55,033 --> 00:17:56,742 You'd be very shocked, by the way. 343 00:17:56,910 --> 00:17:58,703 And listen, with all due respect, 344 00:17:58,912 --> 00:18:01,285 you could put all I know about, say, Mary Magdalene 345 00:18:01,456 --> 00:18:03,000 on the head of the pope's hatpin. 346 00:18:03,166 --> 00:18:05,041 And it's not that I don't love her. 347 00:18:05,210 --> 00:18:07,500 She's fab, you know. 348 00:18:08,213 --> 00:18:09,708 What? 349 00:18:09,882 --> 00:18:11,211 Look at how you're looking at me. 350 00:18:11,383 --> 00:18:14,302 You're blaming me for them, you know, bringing in a new minister. 351 00:18:14,469 --> 00:18:16,843 No. And let's not get distracted, okay? 352 00:18:17,014 --> 00:18:18,842 Remember, it's you and me against him. 353 00:18:19,016 --> 00:18:20,641 United we stand, divided we fall. 354 00:18:20,809 --> 00:18:22,684 No, no, no. No, my friend. 355 00:18:22,853 --> 00:18:24,763 This is you against him. 356 00:18:24,938 --> 00:18:26,481 I just came along for the ride. 357 00:18:26,648 --> 00:18:28,144 - You drove. - Yeah, I drove. 358 00:18:28,317 --> 00:18:30,524 - I told you I didn't want to drive. - But you did. 359 00:18:30,694 --> 00:18:32,818 You were hawking me. 360 00:18:32,988 --> 00:18:35,527 It's on money and the meaning of life. 361 00:18:35,699 --> 00:18:39,745 I reworked this op-ed piece I wrote for The New York Times. 362 00:18:43,040 --> 00:18:45,662 Well, we'll just take it with us and I'll give you a call later. 363 00:18:45,834 --> 00:18:47,958 Great. But only if you feel like it. 364 00:18:48,128 --> 00:18:49,208 Only if you have the time. 365 00:18:49,379 --> 00:18:51,338 I don't wanna get myself into trouble with Annie 366 00:18:51,507 --> 00:18:53,002 for getting you back to work too soon. 367 00:18:53,175 --> 00:18:54,919 Don't worry about Annie. I think, you know, 368 00:18:55,093 --> 00:18:57,171 she's ready for me to get out and get back to work. 369 00:18:57,346 --> 00:18:58,509 She is? 370 00:18:58,680 --> 00:19:02,382 I mean, of course she is. Yeah. 371 00:19:12,194 --> 00:19:13,689 So, what if the car didn't slow down? 372 00:19:13,862 --> 00:19:15,986 Then the guy would never have pulled over. 373 00:19:16,156 --> 00:19:17,651 That's not true. 374 00:19:17,824 --> 00:19:21,526 It's not likely a guy in a stolen car is going to pull over. 375 00:19:21,703 --> 00:19:23,697 Well, I wish we'd find a guy driving a stolen car. 376 00:19:23,872 --> 00:19:26,281 - I don't. ROXANNE: I'm with you. 377 00:19:26,458 --> 00:19:29,246 I'm getting bored. I'm ready to see some action. 378 00:19:32,047 --> 00:19:35,915 It's just that ever since I broke up with my boyfriend 379 00:19:36,093 --> 00:19:41,052 whenever it's quiet like this and there's nothing much going on 380 00:19:41,223 --> 00:19:45,174 I can't help thinking, I'd really like a boyfriend. 381 00:19:45,352 --> 00:19:47,180 Someone I have something in common with. 382 00:19:47,604 --> 00:19:50,690 Someone with whom I can start a lasting relationship. 383 00:19:50,858 --> 00:19:53,895 Someone to marry, to have children with. 384 00:19:54,069 --> 00:19:56,193 I wish I knew someone like that. 385 00:19:56,363 --> 00:19:57,989 Well, you don't. 386 00:20:00,325 --> 00:20:02,118 So why did you and your boyfriend break up? 387 00:20:02,286 --> 00:20:04,742 ROXANNE: Jealousy. Plain and simple jealousy. 388 00:20:04,913 --> 00:20:06,990 I thought if I got myself partnered with someone 389 00:20:07,165 --> 00:20:08,744 who was in a committed relationship 390 00:20:08,917 --> 00:20:11,326 then that would help ease Stanley's mind. 391 00:20:11,503 --> 00:20:14,458 But Stanley told me that when a guy is considering marriage 392 00:20:14,631 --> 00:20:17,550 that's when he's most likely to put himself through the test. 393 00:20:17,718 --> 00:20:20,387 He thought Kevin would test himself with me. 394 00:20:22,097 --> 00:20:24,850 You know, he became insanely jealous. 395 00:20:25,017 --> 00:20:28,268 Did Stanley have any problems with your going out with Robbie? 396 00:20:28,729 --> 00:20:30,105 He never knew about that. 397 00:20:30,272 --> 00:20:32,431 Don't tell me you lied to Stanley? 398 00:20:32,608 --> 00:20:34,400 I couldn't help myself. 399 00:20:34,568 --> 00:20:38,020 Stanley and I were already having problems. Then I saw Robbie. 400 00:20:38,197 --> 00:20:40,736 I hadn't seen him since seventh grade 401 00:20:40,908 --> 00:20:42,866 and I just needed to have a little bit of fun. 402 00:20:43,035 --> 00:20:46,736 I shouldn't have gone out with him without telling Stanley, but I did. 403 00:20:46,914 --> 00:20:50,864 And after that, the lies just got easier and easier. 404 00:20:51,293 --> 00:20:52,753 No kidding. 405 00:20:53,629 --> 00:20:56,334 If you're just making this stuff up so I'll tell Lucy-- 406 00:20:56,507 --> 00:20:59,674 Please. Simon, I assume that anything said in this squad car 407 00:20:59,843 --> 00:21:01,504 goes no further than the squad car. 408 00:21:02,471 --> 00:21:05,389 I hope you won't tell Lucy anything. 409 00:21:06,350 --> 00:21:08,557 You're starting to scare me. 410 00:21:12,898 --> 00:21:13,930 I'm impressed. 411 00:21:14,107 --> 00:21:17,809 I never met anyone who's developed such skills with makeup at this age. 412 00:21:19,196 --> 00:21:20,988 I've watched Mary and Lucy for years. 413 00:21:21,156 --> 00:21:23,731 And has it paid off? All that makeup, I mean? 414 00:21:23,909 --> 00:21:27,112 Have you seen Kevin? It's totally paid off. 415 00:21:27,287 --> 00:21:30,123 But he doesn't love Lucy just because she looks good with makeup. 416 00:21:30,290 --> 00:21:33,625 - Heh. It helps. Believe me. - We want a snack. 417 00:21:33,794 --> 00:21:34,957 We're hungry. 418 00:21:35,128 --> 00:21:37,917 I'll get it, just hang on a second. 419 00:21:40,008 --> 00:21:41,967 Should I add some sparkly stuff? 420 00:21:42,135 --> 00:21:44,972 Is the sparkly stuff yours or is it Lucy's too? 421 00:21:45,138 --> 00:21:49,303 It's Lucy's. But it goes with all the other stuff I've used. So... 422 00:21:49,476 --> 00:21:52,478 - Can we have a snack? - Please? 423 00:21:52,646 --> 00:21:54,687 I can get them a snack if you want me to. 424 00:21:54,857 --> 00:21:58,642 - Yes. - Yasmine will give us a snack. 425 00:21:58,819 --> 00:22:02,319 Hold on, I'm almost done. 426 00:22:06,618 --> 00:22:09,656 - Pretty. - You're pretty. 427 00:22:09,830 --> 00:22:10,862 Thanks. 428 00:22:11,039 --> 00:22:14,789 My mom should be here any minute, so I'm gonna go wait for her out front. 429 00:22:15,627 --> 00:22:16,708 I'll walk you down. 430 00:22:16,879 --> 00:22:18,338 And then I'll get the boys a snack. 431 00:22:18,505 --> 00:22:20,298 - Yay. - Yay. 432 00:22:20,465 --> 00:22:24,132 - Are those yours? - No. 433 00:22:24,303 --> 00:22:26,380 What's gonna happen if your dad suddenly comes home 434 00:22:26,555 --> 00:22:28,845 and you're all made up like that? 435 00:22:29,016 --> 00:22:30,215 Nothing's going to happen. 436 00:22:30,392 --> 00:22:32,184 I'll just tell my dad the truth. 437 00:22:32,352 --> 00:22:34,013 I'll tell him I'm just playing dress up. 438 00:22:34,188 --> 00:22:36,810 - Is that the truth? RUTHIE: Yes, that's the truth. 439 00:22:36,982 --> 00:22:39,604 But if it'll make you feel better, I'll get the boys a snack 440 00:22:39,776 --> 00:22:41,188 and then we can come back upstairs 441 00:22:41,361 --> 00:22:43,735 and I'll wash all the makeup off before anyone sees it. 442 00:22:43,906 --> 00:22:45,864 That would make me feel better. 443 00:22:46,033 --> 00:22:48,322 Sometimes I think you don't understand me and my culture 444 00:22:48,493 --> 00:22:50,617 any better than I understand you and your culture. 445 00:22:50,787 --> 00:22:52,865 I understand that there isn't a culture 446 00:22:53,040 --> 00:22:55,366 that children are allowed to do whatever they want. 447 00:22:55,542 --> 00:22:58,248 I don't want you to get in any trouble, that's all. 448 00:22:58,420 --> 00:23:00,544 You worry too much. 449 00:23:03,717 --> 00:23:05,675 DAVID: Come on, Happy. 450 00:23:07,679 --> 00:23:09,009 [KNOCKS] 451 00:23:13,060 --> 00:23:14,888 [KNOCKING ON DOOR] 452 00:23:16,396 --> 00:23:18,057 Ask who it is before you answer the door? 453 00:23:18,232 --> 00:23:20,272 Why am I answering the door and not you? 454 00:23:20,442 --> 00:23:21,772 Because you're not wearing makeup. 455 00:23:24,154 --> 00:23:26,527 - Who is it? JAKE: It's Jake. 456 00:23:34,414 --> 00:23:36,242 Wow. 457 00:23:36,416 --> 00:23:38,540 You look like you're 18 or something. 458 00:23:38,710 --> 00:23:40,503 Thanks. 459 00:23:40,712 --> 00:23:41,745 I have to go. 460 00:23:41,922 --> 00:23:43,548 I would suggest that Jake go too 461 00:23:43,715 --> 00:23:45,756 and that you go upstairs and wash your face, 462 00:23:45,926 --> 00:23:48,679 but then I would seem like I'm the Muslim prude. 463 00:23:48,846 --> 00:23:50,471 So let me just say, good luck. 464 00:23:53,308 --> 00:23:54,554 RUTHIE: You probably should go. 465 00:23:54,726 --> 00:23:57,265 No one's home and I have to watch the boys for my mom. 466 00:23:57,437 --> 00:24:00,854 My sister dropped me off. She should be back in half an hour. 467 00:24:01,024 --> 00:24:04,774 I just needed to tell you something and I wanted to tell you in person. 468 00:24:04,945 --> 00:24:06,274 Okay. 469 00:24:06,446 --> 00:24:08,689 I think we should make this relationship exclusive. 470 00:24:09,616 --> 00:24:12,369 - What does that mean? - That we should only see each other. 471 00:24:13,078 --> 00:24:14,823 I'm not really seeing any other guys. 472 00:24:14,997 --> 00:24:17,868 My point is, I don't want to see other girls. 473 00:24:18,041 --> 00:24:20,664 You know, like Linda, the girl who called you "monkey lover," 474 00:24:20,836 --> 00:24:22,117 got you in trouble at school. 475 00:24:22,296 --> 00:24:24,254 She wants me to go to a party with her. 476 00:24:24,423 --> 00:24:26,547 But I don't have an excuse not to go 477 00:24:26,717 --> 00:24:28,876 unless you and I aren't seeing other people. 478 00:24:31,346 --> 00:24:32,723 [CHUCKLES] 479 00:24:50,449 --> 00:24:51,481 ERIC: Pfft. 480 00:24:51,658 --> 00:24:53,284 Hey, don't worry. 481 00:24:53,452 --> 00:24:54,781 Doesn't mean anything. 482 00:24:54,953 --> 00:24:57,410 Maybe he can't speak in public. 483 00:24:57,581 --> 00:25:01,165 Yeah, maybe he can't speak in public. 484 00:25:01,335 --> 00:25:05,464 [STAMMERS] That's his Achilles heel: can't speak in public. 485 00:25:05,631 --> 00:25:08,751 Maybe he freaks out in front of anyone other than his own mirror. 486 00:25:09,384 --> 00:25:12,137 You know, he starts to sweat uncontrollably. 487 00:25:12,304 --> 00:25:16,967 And maybe even, God forbid, he has to, you know, mutter obscenities. 488 00:25:17,893 --> 00:25:20,562 What do you think the chances are of that? 489 00:25:20,729 --> 00:25:22,687 Well, you never know. 490 00:25:22,856 --> 00:25:25,609 I mean, really, he can be one of those guys who has it all on paper 491 00:25:25,776 --> 00:25:29,146 and he just can't deliver. You know, it happens. 492 00:25:29,321 --> 00:25:32,406 Especially with these young guys who have no experience in public speaking. 493 00:25:34,368 --> 00:25:35,483 Let's see what he's got. 494 00:25:37,246 --> 00:25:40,366 In the Pastoral Epistle, First Timothy, 495 00:25:40,541 --> 00:25:43,246 the author, allegedly Paul, 496 00:25:43,418 --> 00:25:46,373 was trying to give guidance to his young church community 497 00:25:46,547 --> 00:25:51,210 in the ways of purity, godliness and contentment. 498 00:25:52,094 --> 00:25:56,472 Throughout this little Epistle, he calls for such things such as prayer, study, 499 00:25:56,640 --> 00:25:58,384 and attentiveness to the needy. 500 00:25:59,059 --> 00:26:02,511 In the last chapter he also speaks of piety and contentment. 501 00:26:02,688 --> 00:26:04,516 And he makes the case that contentment 502 00:26:04,690 --> 00:26:07,893 is not a matter of material gain. 503 00:26:08,569 --> 00:26:13,944 He then warns that the love of money is the root of all evil. 504 00:26:14,116 --> 00:26:18,280 By which, he means that there is nothing inherently wrong with money. 505 00:26:18,871 --> 00:26:21,908 Notice that he doesn't say, as is often misquoted: 506 00:26:22,082 --> 00:26:25,701 that "money is the root of all evil." 507 00:26:27,296 --> 00:26:29,918 We are the problem. 508 00:26:30,507 --> 00:26:31,837 Not the money. 509 00:26:32,676 --> 00:26:36,342 I'm reminded of a story told by a Rabbi Abraham Twerski. 510 00:26:36,513 --> 00:26:38,423 A man that he was walking with... 511 00:26:38,599 --> 00:26:39,631 ERIC: You were saying? 512 00:26:39,808 --> 00:26:42,477 On top of everything else, the kid's got a nice head of hair. 513 00:26:42,644 --> 00:26:43,890 So? 514 00:26:44,062 --> 00:26:46,305 CHANDLER: That man is worth $6 million. What is worth? 515 00:26:46,481 --> 00:26:48,771 - So can you drive me to the hospital? - Huh? 516 00:26:48,942 --> 00:26:50,817 CHANDLER: He's not a function of his money, 517 00:26:51,820 --> 00:26:54,395 but what he does with that money. 518 00:26:54,573 --> 00:26:56,033 [SIREN WAILS] 519 00:27:01,163 --> 00:27:03,489 ROXANNE: Another speeding ticket? 520 00:27:03,665 --> 00:27:04,829 You have a problem with that? 521 00:27:06,460 --> 00:27:08,833 You're giving those out so I'll have something to write? 522 00:27:09,004 --> 00:27:11,840 Three kids in three separate incidents have been hit on their bikes 523 00:27:12,007 --> 00:27:14,297 in this neighbourhood because it's used as a shortcut. 524 00:27:14,468 --> 00:27:16,924 A few tickets will make people slow down and save lives. 525 00:27:18,639 --> 00:27:19,968 Call it in. 526 00:27:31,151 --> 00:27:32,777 [SIGHS] 527 00:27:33,862 --> 00:27:36,070 Licence and registration. 528 00:27:36,240 --> 00:27:37,439 Kevin Kinkirk? 529 00:27:37,616 --> 00:27:39,823 Ha, ha. Mindy Kinkirk? 530 00:27:42,621 --> 00:27:44,947 [CHUCKLING] 531 00:27:57,511 --> 00:27:59,718 Are--? Are you sure it's not just an anxiety attack? 532 00:27:59,888 --> 00:28:01,218 Look, I'm not sure. I'm not-- 533 00:28:01,390 --> 00:28:04,475 It could be one of those anxiety attacks that cause a heart attack. 534 00:28:04,643 --> 00:28:06,352 - I don't know. - Wait, wait. No, no, no. 535 00:28:06,520 --> 00:28:08,514 If-- If you're having a heart attack, I'm driving. 536 00:28:08,689 --> 00:28:10,563 No. You can't drive. 537 00:28:10,732 --> 00:28:12,358 Well, I have to. Get in the other side. 538 00:28:12,526 --> 00:28:13,986 Nothing doing. Look, wait a minute. 539 00:28:14,152 --> 00:28:17,190 Look, if I don't have a heart attack and I make you drive 540 00:28:17,364 --> 00:28:20,070 and then you have a heart attack, I'm responsible. 541 00:28:20,742 --> 00:28:22,403 I don't need that. I have enough problems. 542 00:28:22,578 --> 00:28:23,610 ERIC: That's right. 543 00:28:23,787 --> 00:28:25,496 RICHARD: Trust me. You know what I mean? 544 00:28:25,664 --> 00:28:27,243 [RICHARD GROANS] 545 00:28:35,716 --> 00:28:37,840 [ENGINE REVS] 546 00:28:45,225 --> 00:28:47,848 - Goodbye. - Bye. 547 00:28:54,735 --> 00:28:56,894 Tourist, lost. It's nothing. 548 00:28:57,070 --> 00:29:01,283 You think that a magic cone protected you from our line of vision? 549 00:29:01,450 --> 00:29:04,238 - Who was that? - None of your business. Let's go. 550 00:29:06,079 --> 00:29:07,954 What are you guys just standing around for? 551 00:29:08,123 --> 00:29:09,749 Get in the car. 552 00:29:21,929 --> 00:29:23,044 [SIGHS] 553 00:29:24,598 --> 00:29:26,805 I'm not going to tell you. Either of you. 554 00:29:26,975 --> 00:29:29,349 Okay by me. I don't want that kind of information. 555 00:29:32,564 --> 00:29:34,891 And I'm not telling you after he goes home either. 556 00:29:36,276 --> 00:29:37,688 [ENGINE REVS] 557 00:29:41,156 --> 00:29:42,188 It's freezing in here. 558 00:29:42,366 --> 00:29:44,490 Okay, take it easy. I'll, uh, go find you a blanket. 559 00:29:44,660 --> 00:29:48,030 [STAMMERING] No, no, no. I really-- Please, just stay. 560 00:29:48,205 --> 00:29:50,448 I'd rather be cold than alone. 561 00:29:50,624 --> 00:29:51,953 I'm sure everything is fine. 562 00:29:52,960 --> 00:29:54,419 Oh, you believe that guy? 563 00:29:54,586 --> 00:29:56,414 Well, that guy is head of the emergency room. 564 00:29:56,588 --> 00:29:58,961 He worked with the Emergency Cardiac Unit for years. 565 00:29:59,132 --> 00:30:02,752 - He's 12. - He's 37. I asked him. 566 00:30:02,928 --> 00:30:06,131 Thirty-seven does not a physician make, believe me. 567 00:30:06,306 --> 00:30:08,929 Oh, look, don't pay attention to me, really. 568 00:30:09,101 --> 00:30:12,387 - No, really. - How I wish you said that an hour ago. 569 00:30:13,438 --> 00:30:16,061 RICHARD: Oh, boy. - Hi. How we, uh, doing in here, Rabbi? 570 00:30:16,233 --> 00:30:18,772 - Why don't you tell me? - Well, actually, you know what? 571 00:30:18,944 --> 00:30:21,518 Before I tell you, I need to run a couple of tests. 572 00:30:22,072 --> 00:30:23,484 The T word? Tests? 573 00:30:24,283 --> 00:30:26,360 Everything with your heart looks pretty good, but-- 574 00:30:26,535 --> 00:30:28,114 "Pretty good but"? 575 00:30:28,287 --> 00:30:29,568 "Pretty good but"? 576 00:30:29,746 --> 00:30:31,989 Don't say "pretty good but." He said "pretty good but." 577 00:30:32,165 --> 00:30:35,701 Eric, my whole life is flashing. It's flashing before my eyes. 578 00:30:35,878 --> 00:30:40,256 Particularly those days when I had, like, the red meat and the butterfat. 579 00:30:40,424 --> 00:30:42,963 But never, you know, in the same meal, of course. 580 00:30:43,135 --> 00:30:45,128 What we wanna do is we wanna keep you overnight. 581 00:30:45,304 --> 00:30:46,550 - What? DOCTOR: Run some tests. 582 00:30:46,722 --> 00:30:48,799 I'll get a technician, he'll lead you down the hall 583 00:30:48,974 --> 00:30:51,181 as soon as we get the room available for you. Okay? 584 00:30:51,351 --> 00:30:54,638 ERIC: Thank you. - Oh, boy, it's over. 585 00:30:54,813 --> 00:30:56,012 [RICHARD GROANS] 586 00:30:57,816 --> 00:31:01,067 - I'm sure it's nothing. - Oh, yeah. 587 00:31:01,236 --> 00:31:03,111 That's easy for you to say. 588 00:31:03,280 --> 00:31:05,357 Let me stand up for the last time. 589 00:31:06,158 --> 00:31:08,827 I bet-- I bet ten minutes ago you thought 590 00:31:08,994 --> 00:31:12,779 I was just being, you know, very neurotic, right? 591 00:31:12,956 --> 00:31:13,989 - Heh, yeah. - Well... 592 00:31:14,166 --> 00:31:21,498 Why did I let my daughter talk me into speaking inside of a church? Oh. 593 00:31:21,673 --> 00:31:22,754 Wait, what are you saying? 594 00:31:22,925 --> 00:31:24,254 What, God is punishing you 595 00:31:24,426 --> 00:31:27,001 for taking over for me in the pulpit for a few weeks? 596 00:31:28,055 --> 00:31:30,428 You spoke on kosher laws. 597 00:31:30,599 --> 00:31:31,715 It's true. 598 00:31:33,268 --> 00:31:35,511 Then you know what it was? I'll tell you what it was. 599 00:31:35,687 --> 00:31:37,681 I never should have driven you to the church. 600 00:31:37,898 --> 00:31:40,057 Never. Because when I was at your house, 601 00:31:40,234 --> 00:31:42,358 and I had those pains, it was a warning. 602 00:31:42,528 --> 00:31:44,936 Thank you. It was a warning. But what did I do? 603 00:31:45,113 --> 00:31:48,317 I had to succumb to peer pressure. And where did it get me? 604 00:31:48,492 --> 00:31:51,114 Into a hospital room with a heart attack. 605 00:31:51,286 --> 00:31:55,581 I've had a heart attack and this is not a heart attack, my peer. 606 00:31:56,583 --> 00:31:58,209 That's-- Shame on you. 607 00:31:58,377 --> 00:32:02,755 You know, I would think being washed in the blood of the lamb, you know, 608 00:32:02,923 --> 00:32:06,625 would make you a little more understanding, Reverend. 609 00:32:06,802 --> 00:32:07,834 ERIC: Hmm. 610 00:32:08,011 --> 00:32:10,883 Just tuck me in and just-- You know what? 611 00:32:11,056 --> 00:32:12,717 You have things to do. I'll just sit here. 612 00:32:12,891 --> 00:32:14,137 What do they have tonight? 613 00:32:14,309 --> 00:32:19,019 What, the cottage-cheese meatloaf with the dancing Jell-O? 614 00:32:19,189 --> 00:32:20,221 I'll go check. 615 00:32:22,943 --> 00:32:24,604 Chocolate. 616 00:32:30,868 --> 00:32:34,238 - And what are we doing? - We got a snack. 617 00:32:37,165 --> 00:32:38,910 We make it. 618 00:32:39,543 --> 00:32:43,411 - Where's your sister? - She's dancing. 619 00:32:43,589 --> 00:32:45,416 Dancing. 620 00:32:47,676 --> 00:32:50,797 [EASY-LISTENING MUSIC PLAYING ON TAPE RECORDER] 621 00:33:05,277 --> 00:33:06,309 [MUSIC STOPS] 622 00:33:06,486 --> 00:33:07,567 ANNIE: What's going on? 623 00:33:07,738 --> 00:33:10,740 Uh, we were just sealing the deal on our exclusivity with a dance? 624 00:33:10,908 --> 00:33:11,940 Then I was going home. 625 00:33:13,493 --> 00:33:15,783 But I'll be going home now. 626 00:33:24,379 --> 00:33:26,456 [RINGING] 627 00:33:32,012 --> 00:33:33,176 Reverend Camden's office. 628 00:33:34,348 --> 00:33:36,092 ERIC [IN WOMAN'S VOICE]: Who is this? 629 00:33:36,266 --> 00:33:37,548 This is Chandler. 630 00:33:38,227 --> 00:33:39,805 Oh, and what do you do at the church? 631 00:33:41,980 --> 00:33:44,733 I'm the associate pastor. 632 00:33:45,025 --> 00:33:48,062 I do whatever anyone wants me to do. 633 00:33:48,237 --> 00:33:50,029 Except for go back to where I came from. 634 00:33:52,032 --> 00:33:53,361 How nice. 635 00:33:53,534 --> 00:33:56,370 Is there something I can help you with, Reverend Camden? 636 00:33:56,745 --> 00:33:58,537 [IN NORMAL VOICE] I need a ride home. 637 00:34:04,628 --> 00:34:05,874 But-- But I do need you. 638 00:34:06,046 --> 00:34:08,004 Uh, that's why I asked you to look at my sermon. 639 00:34:08,173 --> 00:34:09,752 Right, because you needed me. 640 00:34:09,925 --> 00:34:12,843 You were just showing off. If you'd needed me you would have called me. 641 00:34:13,011 --> 00:34:14,388 Oh, I didn't wanna bother you. 642 00:34:14,555 --> 00:34:17,177 But that's what we're gonna say. 643 00:34:17,349 --> 00:34:19,888 We're gonna say you called me and asked me 644 00:34:20,060 --> 00:34:22,682 to come down to the church and help you with your sermon. 645 00:34:22,855 --> 00:34:25,691 Because my wife is gonna wanna know why I was there. 646 00:34:25,858 --> 00:34:30,567 - Wouldn't I come here to you? - Let's not get logic into this, okay? 647 00:34:30,737 --> 00:34:33,739 Why can't we just say that the Rabbi thought he was having a heart attack 648 00:34:33,907 --> 00:34:35,652 and that you two were at the emergency room 649 00:34:35,826 --> 00:34:37,950 and you needed a ride home from the emergency room? 650 00:34:38,120 --> 00:34:40,113 Because the two of us were supposed to be spending 651 00:34:40,289 --> 00:34:41,748 a very calm afternoon in the park. 652 00:34:41,915 --> 00:34:44,870 The Rabbi could have a heart attack anywhere, even in the park. 653 00:34:45,043 --> 00:34:47,251 I'm not gonna tell Annie that he's in the hospital. 654 00:34:47,838 --> 00:34:50,674 Because the Rabbi doesn't want his wife to know he's in the hospital. 655 00:34:51,550 --> 00:34:55,216 - Don't judge me. - I'm-- I'm not judging. 656 00:34:55,429 --> 00:34:57,339 Until a few short weeks ago I was an honest man 657 00:34:57,514 --> 00:34:58,926 who enjoyed an honest day's work. 658 00:34:59,099 --> 00:35:01,342 And then you came along and complicated my life. 659 00:35:01,518 --> 00:35:02,717 [DOOR OPENS] 660 00:35:03,437 --> 00:35:06,439 Where have you been? And where is Rabbi Glass? 661 00:35:06,899 --> 00:35:08,394 And why are you here? 662 00:35:08,567 --> 00:35:12,103 Uh, Reverend Camden just, uh, needed a ride. 663 00:35:12,529 --> 00:35:14,689 - From? - From hell. 664 00:35:17,451 --> 00:35:20,120 Well, good night, Chandler, and thank you for helping my husband. 665 00:35:20,287 --> 00:35:22,993 Helping? Is this your idea of helping? 666 00:35:23,832 --> 00:35:26,620 - Well, kind of. - You weren't helping. 667 00:35:26,793 --> 00:35:28,871 You know why? Because I don't want your help. 668 00:35:29,046 --> 00:35:31,715 And don't think just because I needed a ride and you gave it to me 669 00:35:31,882 --> 00:35:34,172 we've had some sort of a bonding experience. 670 00:35:36,428 --> 00:35:37,460 Okay. 671 00:35:39,014 --> 00:35:41,553 Well, then... Good night. 672 00:35:43,685 --> 00:35:45,975 Rosina called. Is Richard on his way home? 673 00:35:46,146 --> 00:35:49,433 Possibly. He stopped off at the hospital. 674 00:35:49,608 --> 00:35:51,602 - For? - Tests. 675 00:35:51,777 --> 00:35:55,361 - It's nothing. He had an anxiety attack. - Why doesn't Rosina know about it? 676 00:35:55,531 --> 00:35:56,942 Because he wants to tell Rosina 677 00:35:57,115 --> 00:35:59,026 after the tests are over and everything's okay. 678 00:35:59,201 --> 00:36:01,278 - And when will that be? - Tomorrow. 679 00:36:01,453 --> 00:36:02,485 And tonight? 680 00:36:02,663 --> 00:36:05,237 He's telling her that he's sleeping over at our house. 681 00:36:05,415 --> 00:36:07,872 He's telling Rosina that he's sleeping over at our house 682 00:36:08,043 --> 00:36:10,001 when, actually, he's in the hospital? 683 00:36:10,462 --> 00:36:13,381 - I owe him. - What do you owe him for? 684 00:36:13,549 --> 00:36:15,092 Just for driving me around. 685 00:36:15,634 --> 00:36:18,387 Around where? I-- I thought you two were going to the park. 686 00:36:18,554 --> 00:36:21,223 Yeah. Well, we stopped off at the church. 687 00:36:21,390 --> 00:36:22,422 [SIGHS] 688 00:36:23,559 --> 00:36:27,889 - To spy on Chandler? - To check on Chandler. 689 00:36:28,897 --> 00:36:30,274 Who are you? 690 00:36:37,197 --> 00:36:38,692 [SIGHS] 691 00:36:40,951 --> 00:36:42,695 In a minute. 692 00:36:44,246 --> 00:36:46,453 SIMON: I can outrun you, you know. - No, you can't. 693 00:36:46,623 --> 00:36:50,159 - I'm not gonna say anything. - I know her, she's relentless. 694 00:36:50,335 --> 00:36:53,041 I know her better. That's why I'm not gonna tell her anything. 695 00:36:53,213 --> 00:36:57,342 You know, there's a reason why Lucy gets left out and told about stuff last. 696 00:36:57,509 --> 00:37:00,048 She's crazy. 697 00:37:00,220 --> 00:37:01,466 [CHUCKLES] 698 00:37:02,890 --> 00:37:04,349 [SIGHS] 699 00:37:05,350 --> 00:37:06,846 Good night. 700 00:37:08,854 --> 00:37:09,886 What's up, Kevin? 701 00:37:10,063 --> 00:37:11,345 [SIGHS] 702 00:37:11,523 --> 00:37:12,639 [DOOR CLOSES] 703 00:37:12,816 --> 00:37:15,308 Let me try this out on you and see what you think. 704 00:37:17,029 --> 00:37:18,061 Okay. 705 00:37:18,238 --> 00:37:20,066 Ruthie, I'm sorry. 706 00:37:20,240 --> 00:37:24,239 I should've stayed or I should've insisted Jake leave when I did. 707 00:37:24,411 --> 00:37:26,903 Hey, you warned me something bad would happen. 708 00:37:27,080 --> 00:37:28,873 I'm on restriction for two weeks. 709 00:37:29,041 --> 00:37:31,367 [OVER PHONE] He can't call or come near the house. 710 00:37:31,543 --> 00:37:34,960 And I can't call him or anyone else, or have any visitors. 711 00:37:35,130 --> 00:37:37,005 You sound kind of happy about it. 712 00:37:37,674 --> 00:37:39,751 It's my first official restriction. 713 00:37:39,927 --> 00:37:43,344 I've had stuff taken away before, but I've never been restricted. 714 00:37:43,514 --> 00:37:45,887 I feel like a grown-up or at least like a teenager. 715 00:37:46,058 --> 00:37:47,090 But you-- 716 00:37:47,267 --> 00:37:48,300 [SIGHS] 717 00:37:48,477 --> 00:37:49,509 Congratulations. 718 00:37:49,686 --> 00:37:52,225 Goodbye. I'll see you at school. 719 00:38:01,490 --> 00:38:03,982 I called Yasmine and let her know that I won't be able to call 720 00:38:04,159 --> 00:38:06,698 or entertain her or anyone else for a couple weeks. 721 00:38:06,870 --> 00:38:09,279 I can see by your attitude that you don't quite get 722 00:38:09,456 --> 00:38:11,533 that your actions have consequences. 723 00:38:12,042 --> 00:38:16,255 Sure, I do. Restriction is definitely a consequence of my actions. 724 00:38:17,089 --> 00:38:19,497 Why don't you say good night to the boys? 725 00:38:21,593 --> 00:38:24,085 Good night, Sam. Night, David. 726 00:38:28,183 --> 00:38:29,928 What's going on? 727 00:38:30,394 --> 00:38:32,601 My tummy hurts. 728 00:38:32,771 --> 00:38:35,144 We ate too many snacks. 729 00:38:35,315 --> 00:38:37,309 We don't feel good. 730 00:38:37,484 --> 00:38:39,976 I'm sorry. It's my fault, isn't it? 731 00:38:40,153 --> 00:38:42,361 [IN UNISON] Yes. No. 732 00:38:42,865 --> 00:38:45,783 [IN UNISON] It's his fault. 733 00:38:45,993 --> 00:38:47,404 How about I stay in here tonight. 734 00:38:47,578 --> 00:38:50,117 And if you need anything I'll be right by your side. 735 00:38:50,289 --> 00:38:52,615 [IN UNISON] Okay. 736 00:38:55,294 --> 00:38:57,536 - Thank you and good night. - Good night. 737 00:38:59,840 --> 00:39:02,166 Oh, and if you need anything, 738 00:39:02,593 --> 00:39:04,302 I'll be asleep. 739 00:39:11,226 --> 00:39:12,971 [HAPPY WHIMPERS] 740 00:39:19,234 --> 00:39:20,813 Come in. 741 00:39:21,445 --> 00:39:23,984 - Hi. - Hi. 742 00:39:27,284 --> 00:39:29,693 You wanna tell me why you were meeting with Chandler today? 743 00:39:29,870 --> 00:39:31,698 He let your little secret slip. 744 00:39:31,872 --> 00:39:33,284 You went to see him? 745 00:39:33,457 --> 00:39:34,952 I told him I thought it would be best 746 00:39:35,125 --> 00:39:37,997 if he packed up and, you know, left town. 747 00:39:40,297 --> 00:39:41,329 Thank you. 748 00:39:41,507 --> 00:39:43,631 I know he won't but I... 749 00:39:43,800 --> 00:39:45,379 Thank you. 750 00:39:46,261 --> 00:39:48,219 It means a lot to me 751 00:39:48,388 --> 00:39:50,715 that you would do something stupid like that on my behalf. 752 00:39:51,934 --> 00:39:53,429 I can't take all the credit. 753 00:39:53,602 --> 00:39:55,145 Mary asked me to do it. 754 00:39:56,563 --> 00:39:57,845 They're good kids. 755 00:39:58,398 --> 00:39:59,479 Yeah. 756 00:39:59,650 --> 00:40:00,931 Good night. 757 00:40:01,109 --> 00:40:02,605 ROBBIE: Good night. 758 00:40:25,342 --> 00:40:27,051 Something go wrong on the ride-along? 759 00:40:27,511 --> 00:40:28,543 Yes. 760 00:40:28,971 --> 00:40:31,260 - I was kidding. - I know. 761 00:40:31,431 --> 00:40:33,924 - Were you kidding? - No. 762 00:40:34,685 --> 00:40:35,765 Roxanne? 763 00:40:35,936 --> 00:40:37,597 You know how you've been wanting to know 764 00:40:37,771 --> 00:40:39,350 if I've ever been with someone before? 765 00:40:40,440 --> 00:40:41,936 Please don't tell me it's Roxanne. 766 00:40:42,359 --> 00:40:43,854 It's not Roxanne. 767 00:40:44,069 --> 00:40:45,612 [SIGHS] 768 00:40:45,779 --> 00:40:47,654 Lucy, when I graduated from high school 769 00:40:47,823 --> 00:40:50,694 my girlfriend thought she was pregnant and we got married. 770 00:40:51,618 --> 00:40:53,778 In the church, small family wedding. 771 00:40:53,954 --> 00:40:55,663 Only she wasn't pregnant 772 00:40:55,831 --> 00:40:58,074 and neither one of us wanted to get married at 18. 773 00:40:58,250 --> 00:41:01,003 So six months later, we divorced. 774 00:41:10,846 --> 00:41:12,341 So the good news is, 775 00:41:12,514 --> 00:41:14,674 I can't get married in the Catholic Church. 776 00:41:14,850 --> 00:41:18,386 So that won't be an issue for us when we plan our wedding. 777 00:41:19,730 --> 00:41:21,190 Why didn't you tell me? 778 00:41:21,773 --> 00:41:23,648 I was afraid you wouldn't love me. 779 00:41:23,817 --> 00:41:26,903 I was afraid this would be a deal breaker. 780 00:41:27,112 --> 00:41:28,572 But I do love you. 781 00:41:28,739 --> 00:41:30,946 And I've always been afraid that you won't love me, 782 00:41:31,116 --> 00:41:33,406 so I guess I know just how you feel. 783 00:41:33,577 --> 00:41:34,823 Really? 784 00:41:35,996 --> 00:41:37,705 Really. 785 00:41:38,332 --> 00:41:39,791 I love you, Kevin. 786 00:41:40,959 --> 00:41:42,123 I love you. 787 00:41:44,046 --> 00:41:45,956 Why are you telling me this now? 788 00:41:47,090 --> 00:41:49,582 I pulled someone over today and it was her. 789 00:41:50,260 --> 00:41:51,969 She had a long layover at LAX, 790 00:41:52,137 --> 00:41:54,427 so she rented a car and drove to the beach. 791 00:41:55,224 --> 00:41:56,767 I stopped her for speeding. 792 00:41:56,934 --> 00:41:58,974 She's married, she lives in New Zealand. 793 00:41:59,144 --> 00:42:02,146 They have two kids, a boy and a girl. 794 00:42:03,023 --> 00:42:04,933 So Roxanne met her first? 795 00:42:06,109 --> 00:42:07,486 Roxanne didn't meet her. 796 00:42:07,653 --> 00:42:09,112 Well, she had to have seen her. 797 00:42:09,905 --> 00:42:13,156 She saw her but neither she nor Simon met her. 798 00:42:13,575 --> 00:42:14,608 Simon saw her too? 799 00:42:14,785 --> 00:42:16,695 Which is the only reason why you're telling me. 800 00:42:16,870 --> 00:42:19,196 I was gonna tell you eventually. 801 00:42:19,373 --> 00:42:22,494 - Is she pretty? - Luce, don't do this. 802 00:42:22,668 --> 00:42:27,046 - Is she? - I don't know. You can ask Simon. 803 00:42:27,631 --> 00:42:29,541 I will. I'll ask him right now. 804 00:42:39,893 --> 00:42:41,057 [LUCY SIGHS] 805 00:42:41,228 --> 00:42:44,265 Let's just keep this between us for now, okay? 806 00:42:45,691 --> 00:42:47,067 I told your dad. 807 00:42:47,117 --> 00:42:51,667 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 62951

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