Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:01,681 --> 00:00:03,202
Since I was currently homeless,
2
00:00:03,306 --> 00:00:06,482
Turk and Carla were letting me crash here
as long as I needed.
3
00:00:06,651 --> 00:00:08,066
J.D., you have to get out.
4
00:00:08,276 --> 00:00:09,585
This place is tiny!
5
00:00:09,674 --> 00:00:12,026
And I'm sick of seeing your man-panties hangin'
all over the bathroom.
6
00:00:12,324 --> 00:00:13,497
They're called boxers, Carla.
7
00:00:13,833 --> 00:00:15,114
They're satin, J.D.?
8
00:00:15,393 --> 00:00:17,210
With a breathable cotton crotch panel!
9
00:00:17,324 --> 00:00:17,730
King me!
10
00:00:18,877 --> 00:00:20,951
Ugh, I need to find someone
to split the rent at my place.
11
00:00:21,410 --> 00:00:22,535
I thought you were getting good money
12
00:00:22,605 --> 00:00:23,499
at your new fellowship?
13
00:00:24,668 --> 00:00:26,818
So first, my fellowship gets canceled
14
00:00:26,876 --> 00:00:29,210
because some jackass cures the disease,
15
00:00:29,296 --> 00:00:31,013
and now the only job I can get
16
00:00:31,088 --> 00:00:32,260
is working at this crappy free clinic
17
00:00:32,345 --> 00:00:33,473
for eight bucks an hour.
18
00:00:33,608 --> 00:00:35,202
No one's life could be worse than mine!
19
00:00:38,015 --> 00:00:40,413
Uh...the...fellowship's great! Heh!
20
00:00:40,705 --> 00:00:42,372
Oh God, Carla, please don't tell them
21
00:00:42,456 --> 00:00:43,742
I'm working at a free clinic!
22
00:00:44,118 --> 00:00:45,851
I sense she doesn't want me to tell them.
23
00:00:45,927 --> 00:00:47,450
Women have an unspoken connection
24
00:00:47,537 --> 00:00:49,171
men can't even fathom!
25
00:00:49,588 --> 00:00:51,761
Dude, I know you can't look because Carla's here,
26
00:00:51,847 --> 00:00:54,531
but you're missing a crazy Victoria's Secrets commercial.
27
00:00:54,906 --> 00:00:57,911
I'm watching Giselle in my spoon right now!
28
00:00:59,828 --> 00:01:00,472
You know...
29
00:01:00,556 --> 00:01:02,701
you--you two could solve both of your problems
30
00:01:02,785 --> 00:01:03,830
if you just moved in together.
31
00:01:04,267 --> 00:01:07,753
- Whooooooa. Hold your horses!
- Whoa! Whoa, whoa, whoa, and whoa-ho!
32
00:01:07,865 --> 00:01:09,790
We have a very complicated past.
33
00:01:10,007 --> 00:01:11,563
Yeah, I hurt her, and I'm not proud.
34
00:01:11,696 --> 00:01:12,661
I'm a little proud.
35
00:01:12,767 --> 00:01:15,980
We've managed to restore our friendship,
though, by staying away from dangerous topics.
36
00:01:16,558 --> 00:01:18,952
Yeah, relationships, and things of that nature.
37
00:01:19,057 --> 00:01:20,313
J.D. and I keep it superficial.
38
00:01:20,406 --> 00:01:21,480
Love the superficial.
39
00:01:21,585 --> 00:01:23,650
Dynamite teeth today!
40
00:01:23,748 --> 00:01:24,592
Oh, thanks, buddy!
41
00:01:24,667 --> 00:01:25,560
Sparkly!
42
00:01:27,358 --> 00:01:30,271
Fine, you can't live with Elliot! But you're not living with us,
43
00:01:30,378 --> 00:01:31,450
so get your crap out by Friday.
44
00:01:31,538 --> 00:01:32,073
Friday?
45
00:01:32,158 --> 00:01:32,530
Friday.
46
00:01:32,618 --> 00:01:33,800
Friday's my birthday!
47
00:01:33,885 --> 00:01:35,992
I've already e-vited everyone to a party at our place.
48
00:01:36,325 --> 00:01:36,910
Whose place?
49
00:01:36,996 --> 00:01:38,143
Your place.
50
00:01:38,915 --> 00:01:40,920
Look, I can't just un-e-vite everyone
51
00:01:41,008 --> 00:01:43,700
I've already got two e-yeses and twenty-four e-maybes.
52
00:01:43,766 --> 00:01:45,190
That's a lot of e-sponses.
53
00:01:45,305 --> 00:01:47,280
Bambi, I'm gonna put my e-foot up your ass.
54
00:01:47,458 --> 00:01:49,510
It's a Mexican-themed fiesta.
55
00:01:49,607 --> 00:01:52,362
on the first anniversary of my 29th birthday.
56
00:01:52,467 --> 00:01:54,043
That means I'm turning thirty!
57
00:01:54,617 --> 00:01:57,142
Donde ? 56 Wallnut Drive.
58
00:01:57,256 --> 00:01:59,443
Cuando ? Thank you for asking
59
00:01:59,548 --> 00:02:02,072
ocho-thirty until upside-down question mark.
60
00:02:02,145 --> 00:02:03,240
Sombreros at the door.
61
00:02:04,855 --> 00:02:06,420
I'll be there.
62
00:02:06,558 --> 00:02:07,441
Gracias amigo.
63
00:02:08,098 --> 00:02:09,640
I borrowed one of your dictionaries!
64
00:02:10,498 --> 00:02:12,503
Since there were twelve surgical residents at Sacred Heart
65
00:02:12,588 --> 00:02:14,650
fighting for four attending spots,
66
00:02:14,785 --> 00:02:16,811
Turk was ass-kissing the senior staff.
67
00:02:17,458 --> 00:02:18,762
Oh, damn,
68
00:02:18,846 --> 00:02:20,401
I left my briefcase upstairs.
69
00:02:20,698 --> 00:02:21,950
'Scuse me a second!
70
00:02:22,146 --> 00:02:23,952
Turk thought he was the only one who heard that.
71
00:02:25,305 --> 00:02:27,053
Docteur Wen, docteur Wen !
72
00:02:27,155 --> 00:02:28,561
DR. WEN! DR. WEN! I'VE GOT YOUR BR--
73
00:02:29,695 --> 00:02:30,690
He was not.
74
00:02:35,596 --> 00:02:38,493
I had no idea that there was
that many Asian surgeons in this hospital..
75
00:02:38,576 --> 00:02:39,811
I got your back, T-Dog.
76
00:02:41,456 --> 00:02:42,770
Then let it begin.
77
00:02:44,000 --> 00:02:50,074
Advertise your product or brand here
contact www.OpenSubtitles.org today
78
00:03:29,385 --> 00:03:31,581
Quit fooling around with those guys and get down here!
79
00:03:35,905 --> 00:03:37,901
Here comes the big dog!
80
00:04:06,985 --> 00:04:08,983
Dude, thanks for having my back.
81
00:04:09,625 --> 00:04:11,513
Yeah. Betrayal five.
82
00:04:17,148 --> 00:04:17,823
Hey, buddy.
83
00:04:17,878 --> 00:04:18,401
Hey!
84
00:04:18,786 --> 00:04:20,253
Betrayal five.
85
00:04:21,835 --> 00:04:22,953
DR. WEN!
86
00:04:24,298 --> 00:04:25,173
Oh, my briefcase!
87
00:04:25,235 --> 00:04:25,803
Yeah!
88
00:04:26,066 --> 00:04:28,182
You know, I totally saw that coming.
89
00:04:30,398 --> 00:04:32,770
Episode 5x03 : "My day at the races"
90
00:04:32,855 --> 00:04:35,390
By z.e.k
91
00:04:39,186 --> 00:04:42,501
Pour [Scrubs-fr.net] et Forom.com
92
00:04:44,525 --> 00:04:46,143
Dude, look at you! Thirty years old
93
00:04:46,525 --> 00:04:47,491
all growed up!
94
00:04:47,578 --> 00:04:48,071
Oh, really, Turk?
95
00:04:48,325 --> 00:04:50,033
Because the Sacred Heart sign
96
00:04:50,108 --> 00:04:52,093
I vandalized last night begs to differ!
97
00:05:02,808 --> 00:05:04,330
Hey! Remember when we were in college
and we made lists of all the stuff
98
00:05:04,407 --> 00:05:06,210
we wanted to do by the time we turned thirty?
99
00:05:06,277 --> 00:05:06,741
Yeah!
100
00:05:06,808 --> 00:05:07,712
Check it!
101
00:05:07,887 --> 00:05:08,942
"Things to do by thirty:
102
00:05:09,038 --> 00:05:12,891
Get married. Buy a house.
Learn difference between senator and congressman."
103
00:05:13,007 --> 00:05:14,361
Dude, you haven't done any of these yet.
104
00:05:14,446 --> 00:05:15,632
I know! But who cares?
105
00:05:15,695 --> 00:05:17,101
I got all the time in the world.
106
00:05:17,177 --> 00:05:18,513
I mean, I'm only turning thirty.
107
00:05:18,586 --> 00:05:21,642
Thirty? No one's thirty.
108
00:05:21,716 --> 00:05:24,350
Where did all these unsupervised children come from?
109
00:05:26,408 --> 00:05:29,092
So you wanted to talk to me about your appendectomy, Mrs...
110
00:05:30,786 --> 00:05:34,290
Appendectomy? Now that ain't right!
111
00:05:34,585 --> 00:05:38,310
Look, fifteen percent of all surgical complications are anesthesia-related,
112
00:05:38,396 --> 00:05:41,612
so I would like to use hypnosis instead of the traditional anesthesia.
113
00:05:41,955 --> 00:05:44,533
Well, I'd like to sleep with Beyonc� instead of my wife tonight,
114
00:05:44,617 --> 00:05:45,812
but that ain't happening either,
115
00:05:45,898 --> 00:05:47,233
you know what I'm saying!?
116
00:05:48,655 --> 00:05:50,113
Tell you what, I'll think about it.
117
00:05:50,588 --> 00:05:52,410
My appendectomy patient
118
00:05:52,475 --> 00:05:54,442
wants me to use hypnosis instead of anesthesia.
119
00:05:54,527 --> 00:05:57,653
Lookit, I'd like to throw it in Gwen Stefani tonight instead of Jordan,
120
00:05:57,725 --> 00:05:59,240
but that ain't gonna happen either.
121
00:05:59,317 --> 00:06:00,090
Dr. Cox!
122
00:06:00,166 --> 00:06:03,530
Dr. Cox! No! Awful!
123
00:06:03,846 --> 00:06:05,983
Hypnosis is a very powerful tool.
124
00:06:06,045 --> 00:06:08,490
It's helped people with depression and weight loss
125
00:06:08,578 --> 00:06:09,453
it helped me quit smoking.
126
00:06:09,757 --> 00:06:12,531
Hypnosis is for birthday parties and bad Vegas lounges.
127
00:06:12,616 --> 00:06:15,651
Now, you go tell your patient to let you do what you do best:
128
00:06:15,718 --> 00:06:17,540
Knock her out, and then start digging around
129
00:06:17,608 --> 00:06:20,290
inside of her like a blind man looking for a nickel.
130
00:06:20,376 --> 00:06:21,252
I think you should do it.
131
00:06:21,328 --> 00:06:22,120
Knock her out and dig.
132
00:06:22,168 --> 00:06:22,441
Do it.
133
00:06:22,506 --> 00:06:22,770
Dig.
134
00:06:22,846 --> 00:06:23,153
Do it.
135
00:06:23,218 --> 00:06:23,543
Dig.
136
00:06:23,608 --> 00:06:27,771
Okay.... I'm gonna go with Dr. Cox on this one.
137
00:06:27,995 --> 00:06:29,401
That's a rookie move, and you hate to see it.
138
00:06:29,466 --> 00:06:35,233
You always side with the wife
even if she's got a full-blown case of the crazies.
139
00:06:37,718 --> 00:06:39,733
Turk! We're gonna have kids soon.
140
00:06:39,855 --> 00:06:41,482
We're supposed to be a team!
141
00:06:41,886 --> 00:06:45,473
That means you occasionally have to listen to me
and believe in my opinion!
142
00:06:45,947 --> 00:06:46,912
Like, what if we have a daughter
143
00:06:46,980 --> 00:06:48,515
and she wants to get her ears pierced?
144
00:06:48,665 --> 00:06:50,609
Irrelevant. We're not having a daughter.
145
00:06:50,688 --> 00:06:53,528
Okay. What if we have a son and he wants to take dance class,
146
00:06:53,587 --> 00:06:55,880
even though all his friends are playing football?
147
00:06:56,205 --> 00:07:00,110
He can dance if he wants to.... He can leave his friends behind....
148
00:07:00,987 --> 00:07:02,911
"'Cause his friends don't dance,
149
00:07:02,988 --> 00:07:05,832
and if they don't dance, then they're no friends of mine!"
150
00:07:11,226 --> 00:07:13,560
So then I said, "What if our son wants to take dance class
151
00:07:13,625 --> 00:07:15,562
instead of play football with his friends?"
152
00:07:15,678 --> 00:07:18,451
and Turk ran off singing "Safety Dance."
153
00:07:18,527 --> 00:07:21,570
Carla, didn't you learn your lesson
that time you told him the commissar was in town?
154
00:07:21,627 --> 00:07:22,693
Yeah....
155
00:07:22,988 --> 00:07:24,502
Ooh! Someone's leaving!
156
00:07:28,306 --> 00:07:29,813
We saw it first!
157
00:07:30,498 --> 00:07:31,810
Jordan, here's the plan:
158
00:07:31,906 --> 00:07:34,493
I'm gonna go ahead
159
00:07:34,565 --> 00:07:37,021
and cram an entire evening's worth of drinking into the next five minutes.
160
00:07:37,087 --> 00:07:40,223
Now, you just make sure not to engage them.
161
00:07:40,297 --> 00:07:41,802
Be particularly aware of the blonde talky one
162
00:07:41,875 --> 00:07:43,010
I've worked with her before
163
00:07:43,068 --> 00:07:44,563
she has no off button.
164
00:07:44,628 --> 00:07:47,073
If money is so tight,
why not have Jake move in with you?
165
00:07:47,157 --> 00:07:48,540
Who's Jake?
166
00:07:48,606 --> 00:07:51,301
Jordan! ...Non!
167
00:07:51,848 --> 00:07:53,852
He's this guy that I've been going out with for a while,
168
00:07:53,926 --> 00:07:55,153
but we're not ready to move in.
169
00:07:55,237 --> 00:07:56,651
He's a little closed-off, you know?
170
00:07:57,106 --> 00:07:59,691
Uh, sweetie, are you aware of who I live with?
171
00:07:59,805 --> 00:08:03,702
Jordan Godzilla Sullivan!
You stop that, and you stop it now!
172
00:08:04,015 --> 00:08:05,112
Why don't you try
173
00:08:05,188 --> 00:08:06,361
talking to humans for once?
174
00:08:06,435 --> 00:08:07,721
You might enjoy it!
175
00:08:08,258 --> 00:08:10,911
Elliot, maybe you should be the one to open Jake up?
176
00:08:11,006 --> 00:08:13,973
You know like Turk can be a little...immature
177
00:08:14,486 --> 00:08:17,223
you know, like I always have to talk about my feelings over dinner
178
00:08:17,286 --> 00:08:18,951
or shut off his iPod during sex.
179
00:08:19,027 --> 00:08:20,211
I bet you could do the same thing with Jake.
180
00:08:20,336 --> 00:08:24,013
Or...maybe you could pressure him, get dumped,
181
00:08:24,085 --> 00:08:25,183
throw on fifty pounds,
182
00:08:25,226 --> 00:08:28,403
start collecting knick-knacks
and meet your future now.
183
00:08:28,468 --> 00:08:30,703
You know...before the loneliness burns too much?
184
00:08:34,487 --> 00:08:37,253
Gosh, I did enjoy that!
185
00:08:39,597 --> 00:08:41,513
Dude, you haven't done anything on this list!
186
00:08:41,585 --> 00:08:43,300
How could you never've slept naked on a hammock?
187
00:08:43,398 --> 00:08:44,862
I'm afraid of dragonflies.
188
00:08:45,465 --> 00:08:47,100
You know what, I'm not gonna make a big deal out of this.
189
00:08:47,177 --> 00:08:49,012
Neither one of us has made any headway with our lists.
190
00:08:49,257 --> 00:08:51,073
First of all, don't lump me in with you
191
00:08:51,148 --> 00:08:52,760
'cause I'm a surgeon, I'm married,
192
00:08:52,845 --> 00:08:54,042
I've had sex while playing Frogger,
193
00:08:54,125 --> 00:08:55,401
and I'm gonna be a dad
194
00:08:55,465 --> 00:08:56,580
I'm moving through my list.
195
00:08:56,666 --> 00:08:57,722
I've done nothing.
196
00:08:57,808 --> 00:08:59,121
I mean, I did learn another language,
197
00:08:59,185 --> 00:09:03,681
but it was just that one where you put a "b" sound in the middle of every single word -- and I was never fluent.
198
00:09:04,015 --> 00:09:05,303
That secret language was so lame.
199
00:09:05,426 --> 00:09:07,532
Nobot with the labadabies!
200
00:09:08,656 --> 00:09:10,201
Dr. Kelso !
201
00:09:10,898 --> 00:09:11,873
Do you have any idea
202
00:09:11,946 --> 00:09:13,703
who's gonna get those three attending spots next year?
203
00:09:13,797 --> 00:09:15,590
There are four spots for next year.
204
00:09:15,688 --> 00:09:17,521
Three if you're not counting the one going to me!
205
00:09:17,586 --> 00:09:19,181
I'm gonna stick with four, Turkleton.
206
00:09:19,326 --> 00:09:23,102
See, there are numerous skilled surgeons here at Sacred Fart
207
00:09:25,625 --> 00:09:27,331
did you see the sign?
208
00:09:28,287 --> 00:09:30,942
Though there will be no vandalism here, people!
209
00:09:32,296 --> 00:09:33,482
It was classic!
210
00:09:33,856 --> 00:09:37,351
Anyway,
the key is doing something to get noticed.
211
00:09:37,676 --> 00:09:38,370
I don't know if you know this,
212
00:09:38,446 --> 00:09:40,591
but tomorrow I'm doing an appendectomy
213
00:09:40,678 --> 00:09:42,741
using hypnosis instead of anesthesia.
214
00:09:42,827 --> 00:09:44,381
Well, it's about time.
215
00:09:44,657 --> 00:09:48,233
Hell's bells, son, when I say the name Turkleton, people laugh!
216
00:09:48,346 --> 00:09:50,341
Maybe because that's not my name.
217
00:09:50,478 --> 00:09:52,703
Not yet, Turkleton! Not yet.
218
00:09:57,395 --> 00:09:59,461
Elliot, I don't think I understand what you want.
219
00:10:00,517 --> 00:10:02,412
I just want you to open up, you know,
220
00:10:02,516 --> 00:10:05,232
emotionally...spiritually....
221
00:10:05,587 --> 00:10:07,390
Uh, I'm not exactly religious, you know
222
00:10:07,506 --> 00:10:10,111
but I-I do think that God watches after my family
223
00:10:10,186 --> 00:10:12,432
and...well, my favorite sports teams.
224
00:10:12,708 --> 00:10:14,950
Oh, and once in tenth grade,
He made Jennifer Martin sleep with me.
225
00:10:15,008 --> 00:10:16,301
Okay!
226
00:10:16,585 --> 00:10:18,433
How about opening up sexually?
227
00:10:18,915 --> 00:10:21,200
What's your wildest fantasy?
228
00:10:21,286 --> 00:10:22,303
Yeah...it's not happening.
229
00:10:22,386 --> 00:10:23,321
Come on!
230
00:10:23,746 --> 00:10:26,283
Sometimes in bed, I feel like I'm the only one screamin'!
231
00:10:26,388 --> 00:10:28,113
Elliot, you're quiet as a mouse
232
00:10:28,198 --> 00:10:29,492
all the screaming is in your head.
233
00:10:29,917 --> 00:10:32,053
Yeah, but in there, it's crazy...
234
00:10:34,018 --> 00:10:36,713
All right, fine,
why don't you tell me your--your wildest fantasy.
235
00:10:36,785 --> 00:10:37,772
Okay, fine.
236
00:10:38,787 --> 00:10:40,610
You're a Mexican apple thief,
237
00:10:40,687 --> 00:10:41,863
I run the cider house;
238
00:10:41,947 --> 00:10:43,942
I catch you hiding behind the stonemill,
239
00:10:44,026 --> 00:10:45,891
you chase me into the tasting room
240
00:10:45,998 --> 00:10:48,821
oh, if there's a crow in there, fine,
if not...I can live with it.
241
00:10:49,266 --> 00:10:51,963
Anyway, we're all alone,
you don't speak a word of English,
242
00:10:52,067 --> 00:10:54,290
but you teach me more about hard cider
243
00:10:54,375 --> 00:10:56,881
than I ever learned from my fermenting exams.
244
00:10:57,018 --> 00:10:58,553
And our passion is so loud
245
00:10:58,645 --> 00:11:01,083
that they can hear it all the way in the distillery!
246
00:11:03,626 --> 00:11:06,950
Oh...heh. God, I can be such an apple slut! Heh.
247
00:11:07,927 --> 00:11:08,603
'Kay...
248
00:11:12,638 --> 00:11:14,142
When did we lose Mr. Heath?
249
00:11:14,298 --> 00:11:16,393
Oh, we didn't. His vitals are fine.
250
00:11:17,486 --> 00:11:19,891
Doug, I told you to stop pre-tagging patients.
251
00:11:20,225 --> 00:11:22,920
It's a slow day in the morgue.
Nothing's written in stone!
252
00:11:23,387 --> 00:11:24,623
You wrote a time of death!
253
00:11:24,745 --> 00:11:26,782
I wrote "one-ish"!
254
00:11:27,215 --> 00:11:28,551
Get outta here!
255
00:11:29,208 --> 00:11:30,693
Why are you so pissy?
256
00:11:30,835 --> 00:11:34,350
Carla, at 6:41 tomorrow evening, I turn thirty.
257
00:11:34,436 --> 00:11:36,853
I have to find one thing on this list I can do by then.
258
00:11:37,026 --> 00:11:39,152
Maybe you could swing by our parts department
259
00:11:39,236 --> 00:11:40,753
and pick up a pair of testes?
260
00:11:40,838 --> 00:11:42,822
Haven't you used that joke like a trillion times?
261
00:11:43,427 --> 00:11:44,330
I'm okay with it.
262
00:11:44,418 --> 00:11:45,903
"Invent a cereal"?
263
00:11:45,976 --> 00:11:47,863
"Complete a triathlon"?
264
00:11:47,936 --> 00:11:50,060
There's a, uh, triathlon tomorrow.
265
00:11:50,136 --> 00:11:52,870
Thing One and Thing Two have been training vigorously for it.
266
00:11:52,948 --> 00:11:54,580
We're working on our drafting technique!
267
00:11:55,036 --> 00:11:57,522
If your goal is to repel all women on the planet,
268
00:11:57,588 --> 00:11:58,801
then it's definitely working.
269
00:11:58,888 --> 00:12:00,513
Ignoring him....
270
00:12:00,947 --> 00:12:02,113
And switch!
271
00:12:03,008 --> 00:12:04,453
That's it! I'll do the triathlon!
272
00:12:04,518 --> 00:12:06,723
Oh, you don't know anything about triathlons!
273
00:12:06,808 --> 00:12:08,110
Well, I didn't know anything
274
00:12:08,186 --> 00:12:09,902
about cereal inventing, either, Carla
275
00:12:10,137 --> 00:12:13,142
And yet if it wasn't for a certain
harshly-worded cease and desist letter,
276
00:12:13,236 --> 00:12:15,093
we'd all be eating J.D.'s Bananas & Nuts.
277
00:12:15,268 --> 00:12:17,022
You're not serious about this, are you?
278
00:12:20,626 --> 00:12:22,201
Why is everybody wearing wetsuits?
279
00:12:22,306 --> 00:12:24,870
This water's like forty-nine degrees, dumb-dumb!
280
00:12:26,438 --> 00:12:28,500
So what's your best time, buster?
281
00:12:28,746 --> 00:12:30,362
Honestly, Ted, it doesn't really matter.
282
00:12:30,467 --> 00:12:32,500
As long as I finish by 6:41 tonight.
283
00:12:32,578 --> 00:12:37,333
The harder you push yourself to do something,
the harder it is to back out.
284
00:12:37,457 --> 00:12:40,140
Whether you're caught in a lie with your wife...
285
00:12:40,198 --> 00:12:42,160
I heard you were doing the hypnosis surgery.
286
00:12:42,217 --> 00:12:44,480
You actually listened to me!
287
00:12:44,556 --> 00:12:46,622
Hell yeah, I listened to you...baby, come on!
288
00:12:46,726 --> 00:12:49,142
That's the reason why I'm doing it, right?
289
00:12:49,226 --> 00:12:51,222
'Cause of you and how well I listen.
290
00:12:51,326 --> 00:12:51,930
I love you.
291
00:12:51,996 --> 00:12:53,022
I love you.
292
00:12:53,215 --> 00:12:55,053
Or whether you're just trying to get your boyfriend to open up.
293
00:12:55,115 --> 00:12:58,020
Come on, Jake! Come in there
and show me what you're really like!
294
00:12:58,086 --> 00:13:00,180
No one is gonna judge you.
295
00:13:07,967 --> 00:13:09,810
Oh my God, Jake!
296
00:13:09,877 --> 00:13:10,992
You wanna talk about it, Elliot?
297
00:13:11,045 --> 00:13:11,883
Nope !
298
00:13:11,946 --> 00:13:13,622
And sometimes, the only thing you can do
299
00:13:13,697 --> 00:13:14,970
is just dive in.
300
00:13:25,016 --> 00:13:26,473
Oh, Jehovah, that's cold!
301
00:13:26,607 --> 00:13:27,862
Oh, God, why!
302
00:13:28,235 --> 00:13:31,063
There's a little...here's some more.
303
00:13:31,147 --> 00:13:33,292
All right, ease it in...ease it in!
304
00:13:37,955 --> 00:13:40,762
As I side-stroked through the salty waters
of the great Pacific
305
00:13:40,925 --> 00:13:41,992
pick an apple,
306
00:13:42,075 --> 00:13:42,950
put it in your pocket;
307
00:13:43,035 --> 00:13:43,632
pick an apple,
308
00:13:43,707 --> 00:13:44,582
put it in your pocket;
309
00:13:44,795 --> 00:13:46,323
I wondered if everyone
310
00:13:46,395 --> 00:13:47,740
was doing as well as I was.
311
00:13:48,625 --> 00:13:49,843
Why are all these cameras here?
312
00:13:50,005 --> 00:13:52,342
Turkleton,
Turkleton, this is quite the event here at Sacred Fart.
313
00:13:54,578 --> 00:13:56,571
I can't help it, it kills me!
314
00:13:56,965 --> 00:13:58,532
Yeah, we got visiting doctors,
315
00:13:58,616 --> 00:13:59,783
video crews,
316
00:13:59,875 --> 00:14:01,332
even that Japanese newsanchor
317
00:14:01,408 --> 00:14:02,020
who slept with me
318
00:14:02,096 --> 00:14:04,443
when I convinced her I was an oil tycoon.
319
00:14:04,506 --> 00:14:06,413
If she comes over here, my name is T-Bone!
320
00:14:07,158 --> 00:14:10,932
We're also getting a good bit of interest from the seismologists at CalTech,
321
00:14:11,018 --> 00:14:15,042
who I understand will be able to chart the magnitude of the scream
322
00:14:15,106 --> 00:14:17,300
emanating from your hypnosis patient,
323
00:14:17,377 --> 00:14:21,743
as well as, of course, the numerous afterscreams that are sure to follow.
324
00:14:23,696 --> 00:14:25,070
No interviews!
325
00:14:26,658 --> 00:14:27,672
Turk?
326
00:14:27,776 --> 00:14:29,180
Turk, where are you going?
327
00:14:29,256 --> 00:14:30,333
Honey, I can't do this.
328
00:14:30,408 --> 00:14:31,943
I don't believe in any of this hypnotism crap.
329
00:14:32,307 --> 00:14:33,721
I only needed to impress Kelso.
330
00:14:33,788 --> 00:14:35,182
Oh, so great, you lied to me.
331
00:14:35,735 --> 00:14:36,903
I'm about to ruin my career
332
00:14:37,005 --> 00:14:38,903
by plunging a knife
333
00:14:38,958 --> 00:14:40,503
into a completely conscious person!
334
00:14:40,686 --> 00:14:42,021
But you know what, you're absolutely right
335
00:14:42,089 --> 00:14:43,288
let's focus on the lying.
336
00:14:47,728 --> 00:14:49,100
As I reached the biking stage
337
00:14:49,186 --> 00:14:51,141
and finally realized what chafing was,
338
00:14:51,195 --> 00:14:52,412
I got a surprise visitor.
339
00:14:54,048 --> 00:14:55,270
How's it goin'?
340
00:14:55,547 --> 00:14:57,420
Well, my bike is rusty,
341
00:14:57,518 --> 00:15:00,432
I haven't been able to feel my genitals
since they first touched water,
342
00:15:00,826 --> 00:15:03,490
and the only thing I've had to eat all day
is a half a jellyfish.
343
00:15:03,716 --> 00:15:04,540
Why are you here?
344
00:15:04,646 --> 00:15:05,983
Can I talk to you about Jake?
345
00:15:06,058 --> 00:15:07,273
It's a dangerous topic. Talk to Carla.
346
00:15:07,335 --> 00:15:10,171
Yeah, anytime I talk to Carla about a guy,
347
00:15:10,248 --> 00:15:12,262
she tells me to marry him so the four of us
can go to dinner together.
348
00:15:12,325 --> 00:15:13,780
I've been dating this guy for a few weeks,
349
00:15:13,866 --> 00:15:14,942
but I just found out
350
00:15:15,028 --> 00:15:16,081
that he went on a gay cruise last month.
351
00:15:16,165 --> 00:15:17,181
Probably a cheap trick.
352
00:15:17,255 --> 00:15:18,001
Marry him,
353
00:15:18,058 --> 00:15:19,000
the four of us'll have dinner.
354
00:15:19,058 --> 00:15:20,001
But he also said he might be gay!
355
00:15:20,055 --> 00:15:21,032
Dinner!
356
00:15:21,265 --> 00:15:22,201
Talking to you about Jake
357
00:15:22,268 --> 00:15:24,631
violates the two most important tenants of our relationship.
358
00:15:24,757 --> 00:15:27,533
One: Keep discussion superficial.
359
00:15:27,607 --> 00:15:31,791
And Two: No talking while my boys are straddling chrome.
360
00:15:31,995 --> 00:15:32,883
That one's new.
361
00:15:32,985 --> 00:15:35,161
Why don't you just try a higher gear?
362
00:15:35,245 --> 00:15:38,871
It's like pedaling in hummus!
363
00:15:38,945 --> 00:15:40,422
See ya, buddy!
364
00:15:41,647 --> 00:15:42,752
Oh, merci mon Dieu !
365
00:15:42,752 --> 00:15:42,827
Oh, thank God! I think the bike part's finally over!
366
00:15:45,648 --> 00:15:46,811
Oh, no!
367
00:15:53,536 --> 00:15:55,201
I can play with signs, too!
368
00:15:57,167 --> 00:15:58,121
This is great.
369
00:15:58,627 --> 00:16:00,290
I'm being assisted by a magician.
370
00:16:00,926 --> 00:16:03,770
The only way you're gonna get through this
is if you believe it's gonna work.
371
00:16:06,637 --> 00:16:08,463
That was just a fingernail, honey!
372
00:16:08,547 --> 00:16:11,121
How would you like it if I cut out your appendix?!
373
00:16:11,755 --> 00:16:13,202
Let's forget for one second
374
00:16:13,297 --> 00:16:15,000
that hypnosis is used to lower bleeding,
375
00:16:15,078 --> 00:16:15,961
aid recovery,
376
00:16:16,046 --> 00:16:17,201
or help patients deal with pain.
377
00:16:17,278 --> 00:16:18,303
You are married now.
378
00:16:18,427 --> 00:16:20,670
So start believing what I tell you to believe!
379
00:16:21,297 --> 00:16:22,693
And DON'T PINCH ME!
380
00:16:24,695 --> 00:16:27,852
During the eight-mile run, dehydration set in.
381
00:16:27,937 --> 00:16:29,343
Hang in there, buddy!
382
00:16:29,657 --> 00:16:30,972
See you at the luau!
383
00:16:34,386 --> 00:16:36,521
They already finished and cooked a pig?
384
00:16:37,457 --> 00:16:38,280
Hey, J.D.
385
00:16:40,065 --> 00:16:41,613
Ahh, you're real.
386
00:16:42,005 --> 00:16:44,303
Although the dolphin costume's a little odd.
387
00:16:44,858 --> 00:16:46,773
This Jake thing is still really bothering me.
388
00:16:46,847 --> 00:16:48,022
Elliot, you know our rules.
389
00:16:48,125 --> 00:16:49,721
Yeah, I've been thinking about that.
390
00:16:49,807 --> 00:16:51,643
Who wants to have a superficial friendship?
391
00:16:51,788 --> 00:16:54,033
I mean, God, do you remember how close we used to be?
392
00:16:54,225 --> 00:16:55,640
Dealing with Dr. Cox,
393
00:16:55,728 --> 00:16:58,241
dealing with our screwed-up families, talking about everything?
394
00:16:58,848 --> 00:16:59,911
I miss that.
395
00:17:00,525 --> 00:17:01,692
This is working.
396
00:17:01,807 --> 00:17:02,880
Not for me!
397
00:17:02,977 --> 00:17:03,873
I wanna be able to tell you
398
00:17:03,957 --> 00:17:05,493
that my boyfriend really freaked me out.
399
00:17:05,595 --> 00:17:07,313
Well, if he freaked you out,
why don't you go talk to him?
400
00:17:07,427 --> 00:17:08,801
I don't know!
401
00:17:08,858 --> 00:17:10,272
You tell me.
402
00:17:11,918 --> 00:17:13,333
All right, fine, Elliot.
403
00:17:13,388 --> 00:17:14,441
You wanna know why?
404
00:17:14,547 --> 00:17:15,723
You're just like me.
405
00:17:15,827 --> 00:17:19,213
You're scared because you feel like you haven't accomplished anything with your life.
406
00:17:19,398 --> 00:17:21,041
But instead of running a triathlon,
407
00:17:21,128 --> 00:17:23,281
you're pushing forward with a guy you don't belong with.
408
00:17:24,027 --> 00:17:25,791
And you know as well as I do, one of these days
409
00:17:25,875 --> 00:17:27,463
he's gonna open up a bottle of white wine for you
410
00:17:27,545 --> 00:17:29,513
when you really prefer red,
411
00:17:29,565 --> 00:17:30,430
except you never told him that;
412
00:17:30,507 --> 00:17:31,661
and you wanna know why?
413
00:17:31,748 --> 00:17:33,981
It's because he's not right for you, Elliot.
414
00:17:34,485 --> 00:17:36,151
Are you happy now?
415
00:17:36,488 --> 00:17:39,251
You're pretty smart for a guy running in bike shoes.
416
00:17:40,908 --> 00:17:43,862
Must...finish...race.
417
00:17:44,316 --> 00:17:47,333
You can do this. You can do this.
418
00:17:50,106 --> 00:17:51,102
What are you saying to her?
419
00:17:51,108 --> 00:17:52,922
"You can do this. You can do this."
420
00:17:53,516 --> 00:17:54,673
Small world.
421
00:17:54,738 --> 00:17:56,482
Scalpel.
422
00:17:57,758 --> 00:17:59,193
Making first incision.
423
00:18:03,665 --> 00:18:06,122
Well, here goes....
424
00:18:14,106 --> 00:18:15,302
All right!
Clamp, please!
425
00:18:18,158 --> 00:18:21,042
They say that, in life, all good things must come to an end.
426
00:18:23,228 --> 00:18:24,840
Sometimes it comes quietly.
427
00:18:26,167 --> 00:18:27,241
I like red.
428
00:18:27,655 --> 00:18:29,240
You do?
429
00:18:29,637 --> 00:18:32,742
Jake...I think we need to talk.
430
00:18:35,187 --> 00:18:37,222
And sometimes, not so quietly.
431
00:18:37,317 --> 00:18:38,240
You can do this...
432
00:18:38,765 --> 00:18:40,341
Oh-b, no-b.
433
00:18:40,397 --> 00:18:43,543
You can do this! You can do this! You can do this! You can do this!
434
00:18:46,146 --> 00:18:47,302
And suddenly,
435
00:18:47,367 --> 00:18:49,033
you realize you've taken something
436
00:18:49,098 --> 00:18:50,862
as far as it can go.
437
00:18:55,676 --> 00:18:57,232
What the hell was I thinking?
438
00:18:57,315 --> 00:18:59,222
No, you did great, baby.
439
00:18:59,326 --> 00:19:00,682
She's right, Turkleton.
440
00:19:00,765 --> 00:19:03,652
Hell, without anesthesia,
you made it halfway through a surgery.
441
00:19:03,797 --> 00:19:05,040
I bet you could publish that.
442
00:19:05,108 --> 00:19:07,500
Maybe they'll put it in Almost Magazine.
443
00:19:08,508 --> 00:19:09,591
You know, Perry,
444
00:19:09,606 --> 00:19:10,903
it wouldn't hurt you to make some noise around here.
445
00:19:11,285 --> 00:19:14,342
How's this? Blow it out your ass, Bob.
446
00:19:15,098 --> 00:19:17,542
See? My baby made some noise!
447
00:19:17,618 --> 00:19:19,541
Yeah, I made some noise, all right.
448
00:19:22,295 --> 00:19:23,340
J.D.,
449
00:19:24,477 --> 00:19:26,163
what you said before...
450
00:19:26,238 --> 00:19:27,300
I knew you were right.
451
00:19:28,046 --> 00:19:29,902
Anyway, I'm sorry I got mad.
452
00:19:30,625 --> 00:19:32,193
...
453
00:19:33,078 --> 00:19:34,103
Thanks.
454
00:19:34,428 --> 00:19:36,313
You were wrong about one thing, though
455
00:19:36,626 --> 00:19:38,032
we are moving forward.
456
00:19:39,097 --> 00:19:40,731
Elliot, I'm thirty years old;
457
00:19:40,818 --> 00:19:41,590
I'm single,
458
00:19:41,678 --> 00:19:42,593
I'm homeless,
459
00:19:42,685 --> 00:19:44,780
and I'm pretty sure I just soiled myself.
460
00:19:44,875 --> 00:19:46,603
Why don't you just move into my place?
461
00:19:46,758 --> 00:19:47,831
Oh, great,
462
00:19:47,895 --> 00:19:50,070
then we'll be two losers under one roof.
463
00:19:50,758 --> 00:19:53,541
By my watch, we've got eight minutes to finish this thing.
464
00:19:53,645 --> 00:19:54,351
Come on.
465
00:19:54,697 --> 00:19:55,951
A wise man once said
466
00:19:56,037 --> 00:19:58,240
the human spirit can overcome any obstacle.
467
00:19:58,596 --> 00:19:59,551
I can't.
468
00:19:59,606 --> 00:19:59,900
Come on!
469
00:20:00,865 --> 00:20:02,661
That man had obviously never run a triathlon.
470
00:20:05,745 --> 00:20:06,760
You're not really helping!
471
00:20:09,997 --> 00:20:11,821
Are you sure this is the finish line?
472
00:20:16,056 --> 00:20:17,322
I think I see him.
473
00:20:18,487 --> 00:20:19,363
As for me,
474
00:20:19,416 --> 00:20:21,103
I could overcome any obstacle,
475
00:20:21,177 --> 00:20:24,830
as long as I had Elliot and her ridiculously strong thighs beneath me.
476
00:20:33,375 --> 00:20:35,440
We made it!
477
00:20:35,545 --> 00:20:38,053
And with--and with two minutes to spare!
478
00:20:45,477 --> 00:20:47,331
Baby, I'm not carrying 'em to the car.
479
00:20:50,305 --> 00:20:52,381
Promise to help me get through my thirtieth?
480
00:20:53,575 --> 00:20:55,173
Will you tell me what Jake's fantasy was?
481
00:20:55,246 --> 00:20:55,913
Nope.
482
00:20:56,046 --> 00:20:57,051
Did it involve chains?
483
00:20:57,118 --> 00:20:57,592
No.
484
00:20:57,666 --> 00:20:58,062
Whips?
485
00:20:58,145 --> 00:20:58,593
Mm-mm.
486
00:20:58,656 --> 00:20:59,301
-Candle wax?
-No.
487
00:20:59,328 --> 00:21:00,382
-Role-playing?
-No.
488
00:21:00,457 --> 00:21:01,412
-Lasers?
-Mm-mm.
489
00:21:01,467 --> 00:21:02,492
Hamsters?
490
00:21:02,537 --> 00:21:03,181
Negative.
491
00:21:03,255 --> 00:21:05,052
Was he a Mexican apple thief?
492
00:21:05,667 --> 00:21:06,991
If only....
493
00:21:07,057 --> 00:21:08,993
[Script par Scrubs.mopnt.com]
[Synchro par High-Five Team & Scrubs-fr.net]
[Copier/Coller par z.e.k]
494
00:21:09,305 --> 00:21:15,320
Support us and become VIP member
to remove all ads from www.OpenSubtitles.org36389
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Portuguese
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
