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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,269 --> 00:00:05,760 [Meredith] The dictionary defines grief as: 2 00:00:05,805 --> 00:00:11,835 ''Keen mental suffering or distress over affliction or loss; 3 00:00:11,878 --> 00:00:14,073 sharp sorrow; 4 00:00:14,114 --> 00:00:15,172 painful regret. '' 5 00:00:16,916 --> 00:00:20,079 As surgeons, as scientists, 6 00:00:20,120 --> 00:00:23,112 we're taught to learn from and rely on books, 7 00:00:23,189 --> 00:00:26,818 on definitions, on definitives. 8 00:00:27,427 --> 00:00:29,292 But in life, 9 00:00:29,329 --> 00:00:32,765 strict definitions rarely apply. 10 00:00:32,832 --> 00:00:36,598 In life, grief can look like a lot of things 11 00:00:36,636 --> 00:00:40,504 that bear little resemblance to ''sharp sorrow''. 12 00:00:46,279 --> 00:00:49,476 ''You're not missing much. New York smells like pee.'' 13 00:00:49,516 --> 00:00:50,949 [Lexie laughs] 14 00:00:50,984 --> 00:00:53,578 God, l hate them. [grunts] 15 00:00:53,620 --> 00:00:57,852 More pain? Your CT results should be back soon. 16 00:00:57,891 --> 00:00:59,825 l'm fine. 17 00:01:00,827 --> 00:01:03,261 You should go home tonight. 18 00:01:03,296 --> 00:01:07,027 You can call off the 24-hour suicide watch, you know. Honestly. 19 00:01:07,067 --> 00:01:09,399 l'm better now. l am. 20 00:01:13,373 --> 00:01:15,000 Do you know what l think? 21 00:01:15,041 --> 00:01:17,874 l think you're using me to avoid moving in with your boyfriend. 22 00:01:17,911 --> 00:01:20,209 - [scoffs] Am not. - l'll make you a deal. 23 00:01:20,246 --> 00:01:23,647 You move in with your boyfriend, and l'll let you call my mum. 24 00:01:23,683 --> 00:01:26,652 - Oh, mean. [chuckles] - Chicken. 25 00:01:26,686 --> 00:01:32,420 OK, Clara, the CT shows you have an infection in your small bowel, 26 00:01:32,459 --> 00:01:36,088 your colon's inflamed. lt's likely something you picked up in the water, 27 00:01:36,129 --> 00:01:39,496 but it seems to have formed an abscess, 28 00:01:39,532 --> 00:01:42,558 which means you need surgery right away. 29 00:01:44,037 --> 00:01:45,561 No. 30 00:01:45,605 --> 00:01:49,371 - Uh, if we don't... - No. No more surgery. 31 00:01:49,409 --> 00:01:51,775 - l'm not being cut open again. - OK, uh... 32 00:01:51,811 --> 00:01:53,870 - No. - You just take a minute. 33 00:01:53,913 --> 00:01:57,508 Take a few minutes and l'll come back and we'll discuss it. 34 00:01:58,518 --> 00:02:03,615 Um... Start her on pre-op antibiotics and book an OR. 35 00:02:06,693 --> 00:02:09,560 What are the options? Can you give me drugs, can you...? 36 00:02:09,596 --> 00:02:13,157 No. You need surgery. But it's a simple procedure, 37 00:02:13,199 --> 00:02:17,158 - and if it goes as planned... - My boat ride didn't go as planned. 38 00:02:17,237 --> 00:02:20,434 So... tell me. 39 00:02:20,473 --> 00:02:22,498 Worst case. 40 00:02:25,512 --> 00:02:29,312 Well, uh, worst case is... 41 00:02:29,382 --> 00:02:32,408 ...we'd have to take out part of your colon and give you a colostomy bag. 42 00:02:32,452 --> 00:02:34,147 Colostomy bag? 43 00:02:35,288 --> 00:02:39,088 A poo bag, outside your body? My granddad had one of those, it was... 44 00:02:39,159 --> 00:02:43,596 - No, it's a small, small possibility. - No. No poo bag. 45 00:02:43,630 --> 00:02:46,224 - No surgery. - The infection will kill you, Clara. 46 00:02:46,266 --> 00:02:49,394 No! No more surgery. 47 00:02:49,802 --> 00:02:51,429 No. 48 00:02:56,543 --> 00:02:59,273 We tried pain meds, treated him for pyelonephritis, 49 00:02:59,345 --> 00:03:02,371 but it could be something more serious, so we did a CMG. 50 00:03:02,415 --> 00:03:05,248 You did a CMG for a UTl? Why would you even look for...? 51 00:03:05,285 --> 00:03:07,810 Because we were out of ideas! The CMG was negative 52 00:03:07,854 --> 00:03:10,220 so we went back to a possible neurological cause. 53 00:03:10,256 --> 00:03:12,850 So if we could get a better look, if you could give us permission 54 00:03:12,892 --> 00:03:15,793 to get a 3D MRl, we could maybe, just possibly... 55 00:03:15,862 --> 00:03:18,922 This kid's been in the ER four times in the last three weeks. 56 00:03:18,965 --> 00:03:21,365 The pain meds aren't working. Why can't we...? 57 00:03:21,401 --> 00:03:23,631 - Five thousand dollars, Karev. - Sir? 58 00:03:23,670 --> 00:03:27,436 That's how much you or Dr. Robbins has to put up to cover that scan. 59 00:03:27,473 --> 00:03:30,533 Otherwise, you can come with me to my board meeting this afternoon 60 00:03:30,577 --> 00:03:34,673 and explain why you're running this hospital like it's a charity. 61 00:03:37,517 --> 00:03:41,248 - Dude, are you crying? - l have authority issues. 62 00:03:41,854 --> 00:03:43,719 Walk away, Karev. 63 00:03:49,896 --> 00:03:52,626 Where do you get off killing my patients, Yang? 64 00:03:52,665 --> 00:03:54,599 - Killing? - You take it upon yourself 65 00:03:54,634 --> 00:03:58,070 to talk that girl out of life-saving surgery, you're killing her. 66 00:03:58,104 --> 00:03:59,594 l didn't talk her... 67 00:03:59,639 --> 00:04:02,802 She had questions about the surgery. You left the room. 68 00:04:02,842 --> 00:04:07,074 l left the room to give a very fragile, very distraught patient 69 00:04:07,113 --> 00:04:09,707 time and space to accept what's being asked of her. 70 00:04:09,749 --> 00:04:13,583 Then, and only then would l have discussed the possible risks with, 71 00:04:13,620 --> 00:04:16,987 l'm certain, more tact and sensitivity than you have ever displayed 72 00:04:17,023 --> 00:04:18,957 - in the time l've known you. - She asked... 73 00:04:18,992 --> 00:04:22,621 l don't care what she asked you, and if she asks you anything else, 74 00:04:22,662 --> 00:04:26,120 your only answer will be, ''Let me ask my attending.'' 75 00:04:35,942 --> 00:04:39,002 These are good. Do they sell these in the cafeteria? 76 00:04:39,045 --> 00:04:40,273 - No. - No. 77 00:04:40,346 --> 00:04:43,873 - Those are the cancer pops. - Why do cancer people get all the fun? 78 00:04:48,154 --> 00:04:49,314 How do you feel, lz? 79 00:04:49,389 --> 00:04:52,756 Not looking forward to the hurling, but l feel OK, l feel good. 80 00:04:52,792 --> 00:04:54,919 Bailey's on some sort of rampage. 81 00:04:54,961 --> 00:04:58,021 [chuckles] l think it's Post-O'Malley Stress Disorder. 82 00:05:00,433 --> 00:05:03,163 - She's not dealing with grief. - Sounds like Owen's shrink. 83 00:05:03,202 --> 00:05:07,662 Owen's shrink is withholding sex. So she is grumpy 84 00:05:07,707 --> 00:05:10,039 - and inappropriate. - [lzzie] ls Derek doing that, too? 85 00:05:10,076 --> 00:05:12,874 - Withholding sex? - Why would Derek withhold sex? 86 00:05:12,912 --> 00:05:16,575 Alex is withholding everything. lt's like he's afraid, 87 00:05:16,649 --> 00:05:19,550 - but l don't know what he's afraid of. - Afraid of cancer sex. 88 00:05:19,585 --> 00:05:21,644 - [Meredith] Cristina! - He doesn't want a cancer pop. 89 00:05:21,721 --> 00:05:23,882 - Cristina! - Just shut the hell up. 90 00:05:23,923 --> 00:05:27,415 - l'm not contagious, Cristina. - l know that. 91 00:05:27,460 --> 00:05:30,258 l would totally have sex with you. 92 00:05:31,764 --> 00:05:34,631 - Really? Nothing? - No. 93 00:05:34,701 --> 00:05:36,896 - You don't even want a drawer? - No. 94 00:05:36,936 --> 00:05:39,837 - A toothbrush? Change of panties? - No. 95 00:05:39,872 --> 00:05:43,865 - Damn. l like your panties. - l am trying to focus. 96 00:05:43,943 --> 00:05:46,912 l'm becoming a resident today. l need to focus. 97 00:05:46,946 --> 00:05:50,074 l'm across the street from the hospital. Crash here sometimes, 98 00:05:50,116 --> 00:05:53,745 - you'll get a jump on surgeries. - OK, OK. Which one? 99 00:05:53,786 --> 00:05:56,550 My first day at Mercy West. l wanna look nice, you know, 100 00:05:56,589 --> 00:06:00,252 serious, talented, hardcore, not someone you push around. 101 00:06:00,326 --> 00:06:03,921 Nice, but hot. Like me. 102 00:06:05,465 --> 00:06:08,093 - That one. - Really? l thought this one. 103 00:06:08,134 --> 00:06:10,830 Too hot. Better for a date. That one. 104 00:06:10,870 --> 00:06:13,862 OK. Here. Eh, thanks. 105 00:06:13,906 --> 00:06:14,930 [Callie groans] 106 00:06:24,417 --> 00:06:26,851 OK. OK. 107 00:06:26,886 --> 00:06:28,717 - Less hot? - Less hot. 108 00:06:28,755 --> 00:06:30,882 OK. Good. 109 00:06:30,923 --> 00:06:32,618 Thanks. Wish me luck. 110 00:06:32,658 --> 00:06:36,458 Or not luck, 'cause l'm all talented and hardcore. 111 00:06:36,496 --> 00:06:38,623 You're an attending. Go kick some ass. 112 00:06:39,665 --> 00:06:41,326 [giggles] 113 00:06:43,035 --> 00:06:44,764 So, um... 114 00:06:45,905 --> 00:06:50,672 Did you forget to mention that your hot, hardcore ex 115 00:06:50,710 --> 00:06:53,907 sex friend lives right across the hall? 116 00:06:53,946 --> 00:06:57,177 - Did l? - Yeah. Yeah, you did. 117 00:06:58,084 --> 00:07:00,552 And it is only under my tenure as chief 118 00:07:00,586 --> 00:07:04,716 that Seattle Grace has grown into one of the most renowned, 119 00:07:04,791 --> 00:07:08,784 lauded and sought after surgical centers in the country. 120 00:07:08,861 --> 00:07:11,625 Replacing me... no. 121 00:07:11,664 --> 00:07:14,656 Disrupting that process would be an epic mistake. 122 00:07:14,700 --> 00:07:18,466 lt is for that reason that l stand before you today 123 00:07:18,504 --> 00:07:20,335 and say with the utmost confidence 124 00:07:20,373 --> 00:07:24,104 that there is no one who understands and cares more 125 00:07:24,143 --> 00:07:26,703 - about Seattle Grace than... - [horn honks, tires screech] 126 00:07:28,147 --> 00:07:29,978 - Than me. - [hubcap clatters] 127 00:07:32,885 --> 00:07:35,115 [Richard] Look, this is ridiculous. l'm fine. 128 00:07:35,154 --> 00:07:38,590 lt's a sprained ankle. And l have a meeting l have to get to. 129 00:07:38,624 --> 00:07:41,354 - Look, l said l'm fine. - Chief? 130 00:07:41,427 --> 00:07:44,260 - Torres, thank God. - [Callie] You were in a car accident? 131 00:07:44,330 --> 00:07:47,993 Yeah. lt was minor. l ran a red light. l was distracted. 132 00:07:48,034 --> 00:07:52,027 l am fine. Can we make this quick? l have a meeting with the board. 133 00:07:52,071 --> 00:07:55,165 Hmm? OK. Let's see. 134 00:07:55,208 --> 00:07:56,266 Ooh! 135 00:07:56,943 --> 00:07:59,673 Ooh, l don't know, sir. This lac looks pretty deep. 136 00:07:59,712 --> 00:08:05,207 You'll definitely need stitches. And the ankle... Oh, yikes. 137 00:08:05,918 --> 00:08:09,285 - Yeah. You could need surgery. - lt's a sprain, Torres. [groans] 138 00:08:09,322 --> 00:08:12,189 - You two know each other? - Yeah. 139 00:08:12,258 --> 00:08:15,523 Dr. Webber and l go way back. We worked together for... 140 00:08:15,595 --> 00:08:17,426 What was it? Five, six years? Yeah. 141 00:08:17,530 --> 00:08:20,124 l hate to say it, but you have to have that lac repaired. 142 00:08:20,166 --> 00:08:23,397 Being a teaching hospital, not to mention Dr. McKee's first day, 143 00:08:23,436 --> 00:08:27,964 l have to let him work you up, so... You know how to do sutures, right? 144 00:08:29,175 --> 00:08:31,575 - Damn straight. - Great. 145 00:08:31,611 --> 00:08:32,976 Good seeing you, chief. 146 00:08:33,012 --> 00:08:34,343 [stammers] 147 00:08:34,380 --> 00:08:37,816 She's... She's just kidding about this being my first day. 148 00:08:37,850 --> 00:08:39,010 lt's... lt's my eighth. 149 00:08:40,887 --> 00:08:42,912 What kind of sutures are you using? 150 00:08:42,955 --> 00:08:44,320 - Uh... 3-0 nylon. - No, no, no. 151 00:08:44,390 --> 00:08:46,915 Use DERMABOND. Takes less time and heals quicker. 152 00:08:46,959 --> 00:08:50,156 Yeah, l know, but, like, budget cuts, you know? 153 00:08:52,732 --> 00:08:56,896 You like working in this place, Dr., um... McKee? 154 00:08:56,969 --> 00:08:59,130 - You think it's a strong program? - lt rocks. 155 00:08:59,171 --> 00:09:02,868 Like, day eight and l'm doing unsupervised procedures. Not too shabby. 156 00:09:03,476 --> 00:09:07,242 Hmm... Not too shabby. 157 00:09:12,418 --> 00:09:14,818 [footsteps approaching] 158 00:09:19,725 --> 00:09:22,125 He trained at Northwestern and then at Harvard. 159 00:09:22,161 --> 00:09:26,359 He grew up five miles away from here. Not rich, not poor. 160 00:09:26,399 --> 00:09:30,130 Comfortable and well loved by his parents, but, um... 161 00:09:30,169 --> 00:09:32,467 ...itching to do something more with his life. 162 00:09:32,505 --> 00:09:34,666 Which is when he enlisted at the age of... 163 00:09:34,740 --> 00:09:36,708 Cristina, this is not a book report. 164 00:09:38,945 --> 00:09:42,312 l am trying to explain to Dr. Wyatt that l know things about you. 165 00:09:42,348 --> 00:09:44,873 - Cristina... - Wait! He knows things about me, too, 166 00:09:44,984 --> 00:09:47,316 if that's what you were gonna say. We talk all the time. 167 00:09:48,955 --> 00:09:49,979 Honey? 168 00:09:51,457 --> 00:09:54,893 - [scoffs] ''Honey?'' - [Dr. Wyatt] Cristina, let me be clear. 169 00:09:54,927 --> 00:09:58,021 lt's not just that l want the two of you to get to know each other. 170 00:09:58,064 --> 00:10:00,658 lt's that l want Owen to feel comfortable with you. 171 00:10:00,733 --> 00:10:02,223 Oh, he is comfortable with me. 172 00:10:07,306 --> 00:10:11,538 lt's fine. You can talk to her. lt's fine. 173 00:10:12,244 --> 00:10:15,270 OK, Cristina, um... 174 00:10:15,314 --> 00:10:17,544 He talks to you. He's comfortable with you. 175 00:10:17,583 --> 00:10:20,108 Does he talk to you about his trauma? 176 00:10:22,788 --> 00:10:25,154 Does Owen talk to you about the war? 177 00:10:26,125 --> 00:10:29,856 Does he talk to you about the incident between you two? 178 00:10:29,929 --> 00:10:31,055 The choking? 179 00:10:33,933 --> 00:10:38,097 Owen's post-traumatic stress is fed 180 00:10:38,137 --> 00:10:41,800 by his avoidance of talking about anything in the war. 181 00:10:41,874 --> 00:10:44,138 ln order to improve, to heal, 182 00:10:44,210 --> 00:10:47,543 he's going to have to start talking about it. 183 00:10:47,580 --> 00:10:49,377 To you, and to me. 184 00:10:50,616 --> 00:10:55,986 And my concern is if you get lost in the lust of it all, 185 00:10:56,022 --> 00:10:58,456 he won't have to make a start. 186 00:10:58,491 --> 00:11:01,051 He won't have any reason to. 187 00:11:01,160 --> 00:11:04,687 He'll feel that he has everything he needs, until he doesn't. 188 00:11:06,866 --> 00:11:11,428 So l'm asking you... to wait. 189 00:11:19,445 --> 00:11:23,404 - Finished. - [gasping] Read it back to me. 190 00:11:23,482 --> 00:11:27,384 ''Hi, Mom. Please prepare yourself. This is gonna be difficult to read. 191 00:11:27,420 --> 00:11:29,547 - l've been in an accident.'' - That's not what l said. 192 00:11:29,588 --> 00:11:32,921 - ''l've suffered terrible injuries...'' - You can't send that. 193 00:11:32,992 --> 00:11:36,223 ''l'm suffering from an infection which l've refused to treat, 194 00:11:36,262 --> 00:11:39,231 so l'm gonna die soon. Please come quickly, Mom, 195 00:11:39,298 --> 00:11:42,597 and if l'm gone before you get here, l wanted to tell you how much l love you.'' 196 00:11:42,668 --> 00:11:45,228 - Stop it. - ''Thank you for making me 197 00:11:45,271 --> 00:11:47,739 - from scratch.'' - You bitch! You're a bitch! 198 00:11:47,773 --> 00:11:51,937 l can hit the call button and have the nurses take you into surgery. 199 00:11:51,977 --> 00:11:54,537 - Or l can hit send. That's the deal. - l will sue you. 200 00:11:54,647 --> 00:11:58,481 - l will sue you and this hospital. - No, you won't. You'll be dead. 201 00:12:00,920 --> 00:12:02,387 Please. 202 00:12:03,489 --> 00:12:06,219 - Please. - [call button dinging] 203 00:12:07,693 --> 00:12:09,661 Hello, the nurses said you called for me? 204 00:12:09,729 --> 00:12:11,856 This is Andy. 205 00:12:11,897 --> 00:12:13,524 Andy Michaelson. 206 00:12:13,566 --> 00:12:18,731 - l'm sorry, have l treated you before? - Dr. Arizona Robbins referred us. 207 00:12:19,505 --> 00:12:21,234 Oh, Andy! 208 00:12:21,340 --> 00:12:24,468 - You're the kid with the... - With the thing no one can diagnose? 209 00:12:24,510 --> 00:12:28,276 - Yeah, that's us. - Dr. Robbins sent you here 210 00:12:28,314 --> 00:12:31,647 - to Mercy West because...? - These are copies of Andy's paperwork 211 00:12:31,684 --> 00:12:32,776 from Seattle Grace. 212 00:12:34,754 --> 00:12:36,654 We don't sleep anymore. 213 00:12:36,722 --> 00:12:40,886 We basically just go to the hospital. And l don't know what else to do. 214 00:12:40,926 --> 00:12:42,860 - l feel like a terrible mother. - Mom. 215 00:12:42,928 --> 00:12:46,989 l feel like a terrible mother because l'm supposed to... 216 00:12:47,032 --> 00:12:49,933 l'm supposed to do something. And l can't, you know? 217 00:12:49,969 --> 00:12:53,928 l didn't go to medical school. l majored in freaking history. 218 00:12:53,973 --> 00:12:56,908 You're the doctors, you know? You're the doctors. 219 00:12:57,009 --> 00:13:00,172 And, basically, all we've been doing up to this point, any of us, 220 00:13:00,246 --> 00:13:03,181 is getting my kid strung out on pain meds. 221 00:13:03,249 --> 00:13:05,114 - Mom, stop. - l can't, Andy! 222 00:13:05,184 --> 00:13:07,118 l can't stop. 223 00:13:08,220 --> 00:13:10,211 We don't sleep. 224 00:13:10,923 --> 00:13:12,788 He can't sleep. 225 00:13:12,825 --> 00:13:16,158 We can't sleep. 226 00:13:16,195 --> 00:13:18,254 And l'm scared. 227 00:13:18,297 --> 00:13:24,167 And Dr. Robbins said that what she needs you to give us is a 3D MRl of his spine. 228 00:13:24,236 --> 00:13:28,400 She said you wouldn't want to 'cause there's no indication or whatever, 229 00:13:28,474 --> 00:13:30,806 but she says that's what he needs. 230 00:13:31,777 --> 00:13:33,608 Please. 231 00:13:34,246 --> 00:13:37,647 l can't be this useless. And you know what? Neither can you. 232 00:13:39,652 --> 00:13:40,949 Please. 233 00:13:43,989 --> 00:13:46,423 That's a lot of necrotic small bowel. 234 00:13:46,492 --> 00:13:49,825 - Can you save any of it? - [Bailey] Yesterday, l could have. 235 00:13:49,895 --> 00:13:53,262 Yesterday, this would've been a simple drainage. 236 00:13:53,299 --> 00:13:56,735 But that was before Dr. Yang threatened my patient 237 00:13:56,802 --> 00:14:00,238 with a colostomy that, thankfully, will not be necessary 238 00:14:00,272 --> 00:14:03,002 because it did not actually involve the colon. 239 00:14:06,445 --> 00:14:08,879 - How can l help? - Oh, you've done enough. 240 00:14:16,322 --> 00:14:20,088 She asked me a question. l was right to answer it. l did my job! 241 00:14:20,125 --> 00:14:23,356 A patient asked me to disclose the risks of a surgical procedure, 242 00:14:23,429 --> 00:14:27,126 and l am required by law and my oath to do so. 243 00:14:27,199 --> 00:14:30,726 lf you know a way to sugar-coat a colostomy bag, l'd like to hear it. 244 00:14:32,438 --> 00:14:36,636 lf you know a more respectful way to speak to an attending surgeon, 245 00:14:36,709 --> 00:14:40,805 l'd like to hear that! Until you do, you don't talk to me. 246 00:14:40,880 --> 00:14:42,973 You're off my service. 247 00:14:44,250 --> 00:14:46,810 OK, seriously? What is your problem? 248 00:14:55,728 --> 00:14:58,424 More suits? lt's freaking people out. 249 00:14:58,497 --> 00:15:03,764 Talk of downsizing, corporate takeover, rumors that Webber's jumping ship. 250 00:15:03,802 --> 00:15:06,396 You've got the chief's ear. What's he got planned? 251 00:15:07,273 --> 00:15:09,468 - [man] Here's the test. - [woman] Thank you. 252 00:15:10,976 --> 00:15:13,809 He's retiring. They're making me chief. 253 00:15:13,913 --> 00:15:16,040 - No! - Yeah. 254 00:15:16,081 --> 00:15:18,208 - Really? - Yeah. 255 00:15:18,284 --> 00:15:20,946 - Really? Wow. - Yep. Mm-hmm. 256 00:15:21,020 --> 00:15:23,250 l mean, the chief never said anything to me. 257 00:15:23,289 --> 00:15:25,951 l would've fought you hard for that. 258 00:15:26,058 --> 00:15:28,288 But hell, l guess if that's what he wants, 259 00:15:28,360 --> 00:15:30,385 congratulations are in order. 260 00:15:34,500 --> 00:15:36,195 Wait. That was... 261 00:15:36,235 --> 00:15:39,033 - You're messing with me? - lt's just too easy. 262 00:15:39,104 --> 00:15:41,004 You got a mean streak, you know that? 263 00:15:41,040 --> 00:15:42,302 - Yeah. - Mean! 264 00:15:44,877 --> 00:15:49,405 - Seriously, what's going on? - l have no idea. 265 00:15:51,884 --> 00:15:53,317 [sighs heavily] 266 00:15:54,320 --> 00:15:56,550 [keys jangling] 267 00:15:56,855 --> 00:16:00,951 Oh... l have wine. White and red. 268 00:16:00,993 --> 00:16:04,053 And l have cigarettes. Which is awful, l know. 269 00:16:04,129 --> 00:16:08,327 l only smoke them very occasionally when l know l'm gonna be in trouble. 270 00:16:08,367 --> 00:16:10,096 - Like now. - lt was inappropriate. 271 00:16:10,169 --> 00:16:12,933 Not to mention manipulative and stupid. 272 00:16:13,005 --> 00:16:14,870 - You smoke? - l know. Listen, l know. 273 00:16:14,940 --> 00:16:17,374 You have every right to be mad, l ran out of options. 274 00:16:17,409 --> 00:16:19,707 lt's expensive! There was no indication! 275 00:16:19,778 --> 00:16:23,043 There's a reason Webber turned you down! 276 00:16:23,082 --> 00:16:26,950 - So you didn't do it. - Of course l did it, Arizona. 277 00:16:26,986 --> 00:16:29,978 - Thank you. - No. Don't thank me yet. 278 00:16:30,089 --> 00:16:32,887 - The scan didn't show anything. - What? Come on. Nothing? 279 00:16:32,925 --> 00:16:34,415 No. 280 00:16:35,627 --> 00:16:37,390 That looks a little funny to me. 281 00:16:37,463 --> 00:16:40,864 l thought so too, but the radiologist said it's normal. 282 00:16:41,867 --> 00:16:43,562 OK, all right. Here. 283 00:16:45,004 --> 00:16:48,531 Was there anything peculiar about his H&P? 284 00:16:56,949 --> 00:16:58,439 [laughter] 285 00:16:58,484 --> 00:16:59,849 - [Derek] Oh! - [glass breaking] 286 00:16:59,885 --> 00:17:02,115 Sorry! Sorry! 287 00:17:03,188 --> 00:17:05,884 - Sorry! Sorry, we're sorry. - Sorry! 288 00:17:05,958 --> 00:17:09,018 We'll be sure to clean the countertop. 289 00:17:09,061 --> 00:17:10,119 [laughs] 290 00:17:10,162 --> 00:17:13,962 You didn't used to do this before. And now it's kind of all the time. 291 00:17:13,999 --> 00:17:16,991 - Everywhere. And... - You know, it's... 292 00:17:17,102 --> 00:17:18,831 We're married now. 293 00:17:18,871 --> 00:17:21,965 Things have changed a little. But sorry about the countertop. 294 00:17:23,842 --> 00:17:27,107 So you guys are... That's it? The Post-it? That's for real? 295 00:17:27,179 --> 00:17:29,739 Yeah. That's for real. 296 00:17:30,949 --> 00:17:32,473 - [laughter] - [gagging] 297 00:17:42,361 --> 00:17:45,558 - What are you reading? - This patient l'm trying to diagnose. 298 00:17:45,597 --> 00:17:48,930 - lt's driving me nuts. - So take a break. l miss you. 299 00:17:48,967 --> 00:17:52,334 - Well... l'm right here. - [lzzie] No, you're not. 300 00:17:53,539 --> 00:17:55,939 You're here, but you're not here, and l miss you. 301 00:17:55,974 --> 00:17:58,807 lz, come on, l'm trying to work. 302 00:18:03,682 --> 00:18:05,343 l'm wishing for a brain tumor. 303 00:18:07,019 --> 00:18:10,614 l'm wishing, all the time, for a giant tumor that would press on my brain 304 00:18:10,656 --> 00:18:12,920 and make me hallucinate George. 305 00:18:14,226 --> 00:18:16,751 So that l could talk to him again. 306 00:18:16,829 --> 00:18:19,491 So l could laugh with him again. l... 307 00:18:22,101 --> 00:18:24,160 l miss him. 308 00:18:24,236 --> 00:18:26,602 So much. l miss him all the time. 309 00:18:26,705 --> 00:18:29,697 And l just want to feel better, even for a minute. 310 00:18:29,741 --> 00:18:33,006 l just want to be a person who isn't wishing for a brain tumor. 311 00:18:33,045 --> 00:18:35,639 Just for one minute. 312 00:18:35,714 --> 00:18:38,547 And l can't drink because of the cancer meds, 313 00:18:38,617 --> 00:18:42,917 l don't do drugs, l can't even work. l don't have any distractions. 314 00:18:44,089 --> 00:18:46,250 l'm sad. 315 00:18:46,291 --> 00:18:48,054 And l miss George. So please... 316 00:18:49,695 --> 00:18:53,131 Please, come inside and help me feel better. 317 00:18:57,569 --> 00:18:59,662 ''l miss George.'' 318 00:18:59,705 --> 00:19:02,902 Nice. Real seductive. 319 00:19:28,000 --> 00:19:29,058 [knock on door] 320 00:19:30,569 --> 00:19:32,002 Oh. Hey. ls Mark around? 321 00:19:32,037 --> 00:19:34,301 - He's in the shower. - Oh, thanks. 322 00:19:36,775 --> 00:19:40,677 Hey, have you heard anything about what's happening with the chief? 323 00:19:40,712 --> 00:19:43,476 There's all these rumors floating around Mercy West, 324 00:19:43,515 --> 00:19:46,678 like he might be coming to work for us. That'd not go well for me. 325 00:19:46,752 --> 00:19:48,982 l haven't heard. l'll check with Derek. 326 00:19:49,054 --> 00:19:51,488 - Thanks. - Can you hand me the shampoo? 327 00:19:51,557 --> 00:19:53,525 - Thank you. - Mm-hmm. 328 00:19:58,830 --> 00:20:01,060 Are you really gay? 329 00:20:01,099 --> 00:20:06,196 Like, how gay are you on a scale of one to... 330 00:20:06,271 --> 00:20:09,206 ...gay? 'Cause that's my boyfriend. 331 00:20:09,241 --> 00:20:12,472 ln the shower. My hot, hot, naked boyfriend. 332 00:20:12,544 --> 00:20:15,172 And l... How gay are you? 333 00:20:15,247 --> 00:20:17,841 l'm sorry. lt's... 334 00:20:17,883 --> 00:20:19,714 l've known Mark a while and... 335 00:20:19,751 --> 00:20:22,219 But l'll... try not to do that again. 336 00:20:22,254 --> 00:20:24,552 The naked in the shower thing. 337 00:20:24,590 --> 00:20:27,150 Or the you half-naked in the hallway thing. 338 00:20:27,226 --> 00:20:29,922 'Cause even if you really are gay, he's not. 339 00:20:29,995 --> 00:20:32,793 And... and you're hot. 340 00:20:38,070 --> 00:20:40,368 He doesn't look at my boobs anymore. 341 00:20:40,472 --> 00:20:45,068 The first thing he used to look at when l walked in anywhere 342 00:20:45,110 --> 00:20:47,544 was my boobs. 343 00:20:47,613 --> 00:20:50,639 He doesn't look anymore. Not since he met you. 344 00:20:52,017 --> 00:20:54,986 - OK? - OK. 345 00:21:00,759 --> 00:21:04,388 - [Richard] Shepherd? - You're a hard man to track down. 346 00:21:04,429 --> 00:21:06,954 - l'm busy, as you know. - Scoping out Mercy West? 347 00:21:06,999 --> 00:21:11,333 You planning on jumping ship? Because l assume, as a friend, 348 00:21:11,370 --> 00:21:13,429 you'd tell me anything l need to know. 349 00:21:13,472 --> 00:21:17,101 - Those are rumors, Derek. - There are a lot of rumors. 350 00:21:17,175 --> 00:21:20,667 - And Jennings isn't answering my calls. - Why are you calling Jennings? 351 00:21:20,746 --> 00:21:23,544 l told you l'd fill you in when there was something to tell. 352 00:21:23,582 --> 00:21:25,607 You feel the need to go behind my back... 353 00:21:25,651 --> 00:21:28,984 Behind your back? Behind your back? 354 00:21:29,054 --> 00:21:31,579 l'm the one who's got your back. 355 00:21:31,657 --> 00:21:33,215 Don't you forget that. 356 00:21:36,228 --> 00:21:38,458 - Dr. Shepherd, have a minute? - Yes. For what? 357 00:21:38,497 --> 00:21:42,024 A kid with a tethered spinal cord. l thought tethered spinal cord. 358 00:21:42,067 --> 00:21:45,764 You're not gonna see it on there. l need another test to confirm. 359 00:21:45,804 --> 00:21:48,136 A tethered cord's rare. He have spina bifida? 360 00:21:48,173 --> 00:21:50,573 - No. - Lower back lesions? Hyperreflexia? 361 00:21:50,609 --> 00:21:54,568 No and no. But the pain is aggravated when he extends or flexes his spine. 362 00:21:54,613 --> 00:21:57,810 l know what you're gonna say. A tethered cord shows up on the MRl. 363 00:21:57,883 --> 00:22:01,148 But what if it didn't? What if what this kid needs is not an MRl, 364 00:22:01,219 --> 00:22:04,746 - but a more specific CT myelogram. - Maybe. 365 00:22:04,823 --> 00:22:06,723 - Order one. - l can't. 366 00:22:06,758 --> 00:22:10,660 Because if l did, l'd get fired and l really like my job. 367 00:22:10,729 --> 00:22:14,165 - Did the chief deny that request? - Several times. 368 00:22:14,232 --> 00:22:16,530 You should've led with the part about the chief. 369 00:22:16,601 --> 00:22:17,966 Come on. 370 00:22:18,036 --> 00:22:20,163 - [Lexie] You're doing great. - You're up, girl. 371 00:22:20,205 --> 00:22:23,436 Who'd think standing could be so hard? You're doing awesome. 372 00:22:23,508 --> 00:22:24,873 - Awesome. - Put me down. 373 00:22:24,910 --> 00:22:27,811 - Let's go a couple more seconds... - Put me down. 374 00:22:27,879 --> 00:22:31,337 - That was great. - Take a sec and go again for me, OK? 375 00:22:31,383 --> 00:22:33,374 - No. - l know, Clara. 376 00:22:33,418 --> 00:22:35,613 This is where the hard part begins. 377 00:22:48,967 --> 00:22:51,231 [Arizona] McDreamy. 378 00:22:51,269 --> 00:22:54,261 - l'm sorry? - l get it now. 379 00:22:54,339 --> 00:22:57,137 The whole McDreamy thing. l didn't get it before, 380 00:22:57,175 --> 00:22:59,268 but now... l get it. 381 00:23:00,645 --> 00:23:02,772 You know they call you that, right? 382 00:23:02,814 --> 00:23:04,042 Yes. 383 00:23:05,784 --> 00:23:08,947 l'm involved, by the way, in case you thought l was coming onto you, 384 00:23:09,020 --> 00:23:12,421 because l was not. Plus, l heard that you got married. 385 00:23:12,457 --> 00:23:16,052 - So congratulations. - Yes, thank you. 386 00:23:16,094 --> 00:23:19,530 You wrote some hokey crap on a Post-it note in the resident's lounge. 387 00:23:19,564 --> 00:23:22,533 Sorry, but until you're sweating it out in a morning coat 388 00:23:22,601 --> 00:23:26,196 with a ball of white taffeta coming at you, you're not really married. 389 00:23:26,238 --> 00:23:30,174 OK. Well, l've consummated mine. l consummate mine all the time. 390 00:23:30,208 --> 00:23:33,371 How's that going for you, Karev? Girls talk. 391 00:23:33,412 --> 00:23:36,711 You might wanna consider that next time you judge my Post-it. 392 00:23:39,217 --> 00:23:40,377 [Meredith sighs] 393 00:23:43,688 --> 00:23:45,553 l haven't cried yet. 394 00:23:47,092 --> 00:23:49,390 l'm using work and sex as a distraction. 395 00:23:49,461 --> 00:23:52,123 And l think it's working for me. 396 00:23:53,498 --> 00:23:56,092 Have you seen the girl, Amanda, 397 00:23:56,134 --> 00:24:00,434 sitting outside the hospital on that bench all day long? 398 00:24:00,472 --> 00:24:05,034 l miss sex. l miss it so much. 399 00:24:09,481 --> 00:24:11,142 What? 400 00:24:11,817 --> 00:24:13,682 Mer! 401 00:24:13,718 --> 00:24:16,278 l'm worried about Clara. She's depressed. 402 00:24:16,354 --> 00:24:18,515 Like, a whole new level of depressed. 403 00:24:18,557 --> 00:24:21,219 - l don't know what to do. - You talking about Ceviche? 404 00:24:21,259 --> 00:24:22,351 That... 405 00:24:23,929 --> 00:24:27,194 Oh, my God! That's... That is so rude! 406 00:24:27,299 --> 00:24:30,598 Ceviche? That is so... That's rude. 407 00:24:30,669 --> 00:24:32,398 That... That is so rude! 408 00:24:36,708 --> 00:24:41,668 - Anyone else l can offend? - A tethered spinal cord? 409 00:24:41,746 --> 00:24:44,544 One of the threads in his cord is attached to his tailbone. 410 00:24:44,583 --> 00:24:46,847 Normally, the spinal cord is free at the end, 411 00:24:46,885 --> 00:24:49,820 but with it attached, when you grew, it started pulling. 412 00:24:49,855 --> 00:24:54,189 - Thus, the excruciating pain. - So can we fix it? ls it fixable? 413 00:24:54,226 --> 00:24:56,786 - Microsurgery. - l'll snip the tethered cord, 414 00:24:56,862 --> 00:24:57,988 and he'll be free of pain. 415 00:25:01,566 --> 00:25:06,128 She's not normally like this. Before all this, she was like a normal mom. 416 00:25:06,171 --> 00:25:10,471 - Oh! - Andy, this is a normal mom. 417 00:25:17,249 --> 00:25:21,185 - Are we waiting for Dr. Swender? - No. Dr. Swender has 418 00:25:21,219 --> 00:25:22,777 handed you off to me. 419 00:25:24,122 --> 00:25:27,751 [scoffs] What are you, like, second year? 420 00:25:29,561 --> 00:25:32,428 - Third. - That's, um... 421 00:25:33,231 --> 00:25:37,463 - Can we page Dr. Swender or something? - Stevens, this is a good thing. 422 00:25:37,502 --> 00:25:40,938 lt is. You still have cancer. 423 00:25:41,006 --> 00:25:44,305 But not enough to interest Dr. Swender anymore. 424 00:25:44,342 --> 00:25:50,042 - lt is a good thing. - You're saying l have JV cancer. 425 00:25:50,081 --> 00:25:54,245 [man] l'm saying your mets have shrunk way down, and there are no new ones. 426 00:25:54,286 --> 00:25:56,345 Your protocol is working very effectively. 427 00:25:58,857 --> 00:26:02,384 Stevens, this is about as good as the news gets. 428 00:26:03,862 --> 00:26:08,094 - Um... So, what now? - We're gonna use the port in your chest 429 00:26:08,166 --> 00:26:10,600 to continue with your lL-2 regimen for now. 430 00:26:10,669 --> 00:26:14,537 And we'll continue monitoring the progression of your disease 431 00:26:14,573 --> 00:26:17,872 with PET scans every three to six months. 432 00:26:17,909 --> 00:26:21,072 ls there some kind of timeline on this, or...? 433 00:26:21,146 --> 00:26:24,547 [man] Your wife is living with cancer, Dr. Karev. 434 00:26:24,583 --> 00:26:26,710 Right now, the cancer has stopped growing. 435 00:26:26,751 --> 00:26:31,154 With a cancer this aggressive, that's pretty stunning success. 436 00:26:31,256 --> 00:26:36,319 There's no timeline. There's just... We watch it. 437 00:26:36,361 --> 00:26:40,991 We wait. We hope it doesn't start to grow again. 438 00:26:44,869 --> 00:26:48,532 - That's it? - That's it. 439 00:26:59,618 --> 00:27:02,815 [Alex] l see contractions in the anterior tibialis. 440 00:27:02,854 --> 00:27:04,845 [Derek] OK. That's the nerve root, not the filum. 441 00:27:04,889 --> 00:27:08,256 Bipolars and the micro scissors, please. 442 00:27:12,063 --> 00:27:16,022 - Wanna make the cut? - No. l don't need to. 443 00:27:16,134 --> 00:27:19,297 Without you, this kid would've been a chronic pain patient, 444 00:27:19,371 --> 00:27:23,671 possibly addicted to pain meds. He owes his entire future to you. 445 00:27:24,943 --> 00:27:26,137 You should make the cut. 446 00:27:29,781 --> 00:27:31,442 OK? 447 00:27:34,519 --> 00:27:36,350 OK. 448 00:27:36,755 --> 00:27:38,416 Put the scissor in... 449 00:27:43,828 --> 00:27:45,420 There. Nicely done. 450 00:27:48,667 --> 00:27:52,694 Clara, Dr. Grey says you're still refusing your physical therapy. 451 00:27:52,737 --> 00:27:54,967 Now, l understand it's hard. 452 00:27:55,006 --> 00:27:56,837 But you have to work these muscles now 453 00:27:56,875 --> 00:28:01,312 or they will atrophy and heal incorrectly. 454 00:28:01,379 --> 00:28:05,975 Clara, you gotta do the work. You got to do the work now. 455 00:28:12,857 --> 00:28:16,190 Clara, l know what it is to not want to live, to wish you'd died, 456 00:28:16,227 --> 00:28:21,221 to lose everything, to not want to call your mother. 457 00:28:21,266 --> 00:28:24,064 Believe it or not, l know exactly what that is. 458 00:28:24,102 --> 00:28:26,969 l have been there. 459 00:28:27,038 --> 00:28:29,131 l am back now. 460 00:28:31,543 --> 00:28:35,570 As impossible as it felt, eventually, 461 00:28:35,647 --> 00:28:37,308 l came back. 462 00:28:37,348 --> 00:28:41,114 And so can you. You have got to do the work. 463 00:28:51,830 --> 00:28:54,526 - You have to get her admitted to Psych. - Committed? 464 00:28:54,566 --> 00:28:57,364 - You want me to have her committed? - Nothing more we can do. 465 00:28:57,469 --> 00:29:00,597 - You have to make that call. - People are calling you ''Ceviche''. 466 00:29:00,672 --> 00:29:02,765 - [Owen] Dr. Grey. - That's... You know, 467 00:29:02,807 --> 00:29:06,903 you can't go out like that, Clara, with people calling you Ceviche. 468 00:29:06,945 --> 00:29:09,379 - Ceviche? - Yeah. lt's a meal. 469 00:29:09,414 --> 00:29:12,406 lt's Peruvian, l think. 470 00:29:13,384 --> 00:29:15,852 lt's chopped up fish. 471 00:29:26,831 --> 00:29:29,994 [laughing] That's really horrible, isn't it? 472 00:29:30,034 --> 00:29:32,832 lt is. lt's... 473 00:29:32,871 --> 00:29:34,668 lt's horrible. 474 00:29:40,178 --> 00:29:41,543 lt's horrible! 475 00:29:49,087 --> 00:29:51,112 [lzzie] l didn't expect this. 476 00:29:51,156 --> 00:29:55,593 They say cancer, they say stage four, you expect to die. 477 00:29:55,627 --> 00:30:00,860 And then you start thinking, ''Maybe l can kick it. l'll be the miracle.'' 478 00:30:00,932 --> 00:30:03,230 Well, you are the miracle. 479 00:30:03,301 --> 00:30:05,929 l'm still living with cancer. 480 00:30:06,004 --> 00:30:09,940 You know, l just... You don't expect that. 481 00:30:13,111 --> 00:30:15,204 lsn't that the girl that George saved? 482 00:30:15,246 --> 00:30:17,646 Oh, Amanda. 483 00:30:17,682 --> 00:30:20,310 - Yeah. - What is she doing here? 484 00:30:20,351 --> 00:30:22,842 Oh, she sits there. 485 00:30:22,887 --> 00:30:25,651 Every day, all day. 486 00:30:25,757 --> 00:30:28,487 - For God's sakes. - Where... What...? 487 00:30:31,996 --> 00:30:35,295 Get up. l mean it, get up. 488 00:30:35,400 --> 00:30:36,958 Get up! 489 00:30:37,535 --> 00:30:41,266 [sighs heavily] Now, go get a life. 490 00:30:43,908 --> 00:30:44,966 l can't. 491 00:30:48,046 --> 00:30:51,243 George was a surgeon, he had a purpose. 492 00:30:51,316 --> 00:30:56,276 He wanted to save lives and now he doesn't get the chance. 493 00:30:56,354 --> 00:31:00,916 Now, he doesn't get the chance to do anything anymore, but you do. 494 00:31:00,992 --> 00:31:03,153 You could go to medical school, you know? 495 00:31:03,194 --> 00:31:06,322 You could hang out with your freaking friends. l don't care what. 496 00:31:06,364 --> 00:31:08,958 Just go do something with your life. 497 00:31:09,000 --> 00:31:12,128 Because you have one, you lived! 498 00:31:12,170 --> 00:31:13,933 You lived and George didn't! 499 00:31:14,005 --> 00:31:15,973 And l know... 500 00:31:18,443 --> 00:31:22,607 l know that that feels horrible 501 00:31:22,647 --> 00:31:26,378 and shocking and terrifying. 502 00:31:28,019 --> 00:31:29,884 But you lived. 503 00:31:31,689 --> 00:31:34,988 So go live your freaking life. 504 00:31:38,096 --> 00:31:40,360 l... l don't know how. 505 00:31:40,431 --> 00:31:43,161 Nobody does. 506 00:31:43,201 --> 00:31:45,465 Nobody knows how. 507 00:31:46,738 --> 00:31:49,866 But, God, have enough respect for George to figure it out. 508 00:31:49,908 --> 00:31:52,877 'Cause if l see you sitting on this bench ever again, 509 00:31:52,911 --> 00:31:56,210 l will kick your ass from here to Sunday. 510 00:32:15,199 --> 00:32:18,691 l can't get back on Bailey's service. She's still not even looking at me. 511 00:32:18,770 --> 00:32:21,466 Give her time. She was close with O'Malley... 512 00:32:21,539 --> 00:32:24,337 lt's not about O'Malley. She's mad at me about Ceviche. 513 00:32:24,375 --> 00:32:27,310 - [laughs] You got to stop that. - Ceviche? 514 00:32:27,412 --> 00:32:30,074 - lt's a patient. - A boating accident victim. 515 00:32:30,148 --> 00:32:34,585 She thinks it's OK to call her a seafood dish. ls that OK? 516 00:32:34,619 --> 00:32:38,055 - Well, it's... pretty dark. - Come on. l'm dark? 517 00:32:38,122 --> 00:32:41,683 l'm not the one going around choking people in their sleep. 518 00:32:49,567 --> 00:32:51,467 Too soon? 519 00:32:57,475 --> 00:33:00,342 l'm not the guy going around choking people in their sleep. 520 00:33:00,378 --> 00:33:03,006 - l know. - lt was a dream. l... 521 00:33:04,615 --> 00:33:07,709 l can't remember what l was dreaming about, but... 522 00:33:08,619 --> 00:33:10,849 l was trying to save my own life. 523 00:33:13,424 --> 00:33:15,585 l wasn't trying to hurt you. 524 00:33:19,197 --> 00:33:21,961 l was... 525 00:33:22,000 --> 00:33:23,934 l was fighting for my life. 526 00:33:30,475 --> 00:33:32,170 OK. 527 00:33:35,646 --> 00:33:37,614 [Dr. Wyatt] You made a start. 528 00:33:41,285 --> 00:33:43,276 You made a start. 529 00:33:48,726 --> 00:33:52,218 - [Lexie] You have it, you have it. - [man] You've got this. 530 00:33:54,766 --> 00:33:56,233 [all laughing] 531 00:33:56,267 --> 00:33:58,701 - Yeah, girl! - l did it. 532 00:33:58,736 --> 00:34:00,897 - You did it. - l did it. 533 00:34:04,876 --> 00:34:06,639 Lexie? 534 00:34:07,545 --> 00:34:09,103 Will you call my mum? 535 00:34:10,782 --> 00:34:13,512 Yeah. Yeah. 536 00:34:15,820 --> 00:34:17,845 OK, come on. Come on. 537 00:34:21,959 --> 00:34:23,790 You got it! 538 00:34:23,828 --> 00:34:26,490 [Lexie] Grief may be a thing we all have in common... 539 00:34:28,366 --> 00:34:30,766 ...but it looks different on everyone. 540 00:34:32,537 --> 00:34:34,266 [knock on door] 541 00:34:38,309 --> 00:34:39,799 Hey. 542 00:34:47,485 --> 00:34:50,420 [Mark] It isn't just death we have to grieve. 543 00:34:50,455 --> 00:34:51,752 It's life. 544 00:34:51,789 --> 00:34:53,484 It's loss. 545 00:34:53,558 --> 00:34:55,583 It's change. 546 00:34:57,829 --> 00:35:01,993 [Alex] And when we wonder why it has to suck so much sometimes, 547 00:35:02,033 --> 00:35:06,163 has to hurt so bad, the thing we gotta try to remember 548 00:35:06,204 --> 00:35:07,831 is that it can turn on a dime. 549 00:35:07,872 --> 00:35:09,703 [door opening] 550 00:35:13,878 --> 00:35:16,278 - What is this? - Take off your pants. 551 00:35:17,682 --> 00:35:19,912 lz, lz... 552 00:35:20,651 --> 00:35:23,518 Be my husband. 553 00:35:23,588 --> 00:35:26,489 Get undressed, get into bed and hold me. 554 00:35:26,524 --> 00:35:29,891 l don't know what you're so mad about and scared of 555 00:35:29,927 --> 00:35:32,919 because you won't talk to me, but l'm scared, too. 556 00:35:32,997 --> 00:35:36,228 l can't... lf you won't... 557 00:35:37,068 --> 00:35:40,560 lf we're gonna have any chance at a life together, l need you. 558 00:35:40,605 --> 00:35:42,470 Please. 559 00:35:43,975 --> 00:35:45,875 You died in my arms. 560 00:35:47,145 --> 00:35:50,046 You died in my arms! You freaking died, 561 00:35:50,114 --> 00:35:54,312 and you left instructions that l wasn't allowed to save your life! 562 00:35:54,385 --> 00:35:58,344 You want to know what l'm scared of? l'm scared of everything! 563 00:35:58,422 --> 00:36:01,050 l'm scared to move! l'm scared to breathe! 564 00:36:01,125 --> 00:36:03,491 l'm scared to touch you! 565 00:36:04,562 --> 00:36:06,996 l can't lose you. l won't survive. 566 00:36:08,032 --> 00:36:09,397 And that's your fault. 567 00:36:09,433 --> 00:36:11,958 You made me love you, made me let you in, 568 00:36:12,036 --> 00:36:14,368 and then you freakin' die in my arms! 569 00:36:18,676 --> 00:36:20,667 [Izzie] That's how you stay alive. 570 00:36:26,784 --> 00:36:29,446 When it hurts so much you can't breathe, 571 00:36:29,487 --> 00:36:31,546 that's how you survive. 572 00:36:43,234 --> 00:36:45,065 [bell rings] 573 00:36:51,676 --> 00:36:52,700 Miranda. 574 00:36:58,382 --> 00:37:00,976 [Derek] By remembering that one day, 575 00:37:01,018 --> 00:37:05,921 somehow, impossibly, you won't feel this way. 576 00:37:05,957 --> 00:37:08,221 It won't hurt this much. 577 00:37:18,636 --> 00:37:22,003 l... l am an attending 578 00:37:22,039 --> 00:37:25,941 and l am a single mother 579 00:37:25,977 --> 00:37:30,414 and l lost O'Malley and, um... 580 00:37:31,215 --> 00:37:33,183 l just can't. 581 00:37:33,251 --> 00:37:35,845 l can't care anymore. 582 00:37:37,455 --> 00:37:40,049 Stevens is not my child. 583 00:37:40,124 --> 00:37:42,684 O'Malley was not my child. 584 00:37:42,760 --> 00:37:45,752 l have to stop treating... 585 00:37:46,998 --> 00:37:50,058 l just have to stop caring so much. 586 00:37:51,769 --> 00:37:53,862 l can't keep... 587 00:37:53,904 --> 00:37:58,238 ...feeling like this, not at work. 588 00:37:58,276 --> 00:38:04,010 l have to save the feeling for my son, who needs it! 589 00:38:06,050 --> 00:38:09,144 l just can't keep giving it away here. 590 00:38:10,421 --> 00:38:11,683 l can't. 591 00:38:15,526 --> 00:38:17,357 l won't. 592 00:38:23,934 --> 00:38:27,495 [Bailey] Grief comes in its own time for everyone. 593 00:38:29,774 --> 00:38:31,503 In its own way. 594 00:38:34,645 --> 00:38:37,273 [Owen] So the best we can do, 595 00:38:37,315 --> 00:38:39,340 the best anyone can do... 596 00:38:40,618 --> 00:38:42,848 ...is try for honesty. 597 00:38:43,988 --> 00:38:46,957 l don't want to hurt you again. 598 00:38:46,991 --> 00:38:49,118 My problems, they're real. 599 00:38:49,226 --> 00:38:54,289 And this... this makes us real. lt makes my problems your problems. 600 00:38:55,333 --> 00:38:57,460 l'm afraid. 601 00:38:57,501 --> 00:38:59,526 l don't want to hurt you again. 602 00:39:03,641 --> 00:39:05,074 You can sleep in the bathtub. 603 00:39:05,743 --> 00:39:07,768 Wha... [laughs] 604 00:39:18,155 --> 00:39:21,989 [Meredith] The really crappy thing, the very worst part of grief, 605 00:39:22,026 --> 00:39:24,324 is that you can't control it. 606 00:39:29,200 --> 00:39:31,600 - What are you doing? - We need the space. 607 00:39:38,743 --> 00:39:43,908 [Arizona] The best we can do is try to let ourselves feel it when it comes. 608 00:39:43,981 --> 00:39:46,779 Hey. Ugh... Thank you. 609 00:39:46,817 --> 00:39:48,842 l got stuck with this intern today, 610 00:39:48,886 --> 00:39:51,878 took him four tries to throw in a central line. 611 00:39:51,956 --> 00:39:54,186 Reminded me a little bit of George, actually, 612 00:39:54,258 --> 00:39:56,590 when he was an intern. 613 00:39:57,795 --> 00:40:00,821 [Callie] And let it go when we can. 614 00:40:03,667 --> 00:40:09,367 [gasping, sobbing] 615 00:40:23,954 --> 00:40:25,512 Meredith. 616 00:40:42,973 --> 00:40:47,706 [Meredith] The very worst part is that the minute you think you're past it, 617 00:40:47,778 --> 00:40:50,770 it starts all over again. 618 00:40:56,287 --> 00:40:59,347 [Cristina] And always, every time... 619 00:40:59,390 --> 00:41:01,881 George O'Malley died. 620 00:41:04,361 --> 00:41:06,556 ...it takes your breath away. 621 00:41:15,239 --> 00:41:17,799 [Meredith] There are five stages of grief. 622 00:41:18,876 --> 00:41:20,867 They look different on all of us. 623 00:41:20,945 --> 00:41:22,810 But there are always five. 624 00:41:22,847 --> 00:41:26,874 l know you all have heard a lot of rumors, and l'm sorry for that. 625 00:41:26,917 --> 00:41:28,179 [Alex] Denial. 626 00:41:28,252 --> 00:41:31,949 And what l'm about to say will be hard to hear, and l'm sorry for that as well. 627 00:41:32,056 --> 00:41:33,216 [Derek] Anger. 628 00:41:33,290 --> 00:41:37,989 The economic climate is... You all know what it is. 629 00:41:38,028 --> 00:41:42,328 ln the coming weeks, Seattle Grace Hospital 630 00:41:42,366 --> 00:41:45,824 - will be merging with Mercy West. - [all murmuring] 631 00:41:45,903 --> 00:41:47,461 [Bailey] Bargaining. 632 00:41:47,505 --> 00:41:51,737 [Richard] l wish l could tell you you'll all survive the merger, 633 00:41:51,809 --> 00:41:54,175 but there are only so many jobs. And the board and l 634 00:41:54,211 --> 00:41:55,872 have some tough choices to make. 635 00:41:55,913 --> 00:41:58,609 - [Lexie] Depression. - l'm on your side, people. 636 00:41:59,316 --> 00:42:01,841 l'm rooting for every one of you. 637 00:42:01,886 --> 00:42:07,882 All l can say is please, be at your very best. 638 00:42:17,801 --> 00:42:19,632 [Richard] Acceptance. 51403

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