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[Meredith]The dictionary defines grief as:
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00:00:05,805 --> 00:00:11,835
''Keen mental suffering or distressover affliction or loss;
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00:00:11,878 --> 00:00:14,073
sharp sorrow;
4
00:00:14,114 --> 00:00:15,172
painful regret. ''
5
00:00:16,916 --> 00:00:20,079
As surgeons, as scientists,
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00:00:20,120 --> 00:00:23,112
we're taught to learn fromand rely on books,
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on definitions, on definitives.
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00:00:27,427 --> 00:00:29,292
But in life,
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strict definitions rarely apply.
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00:00:32,832 --> 00:00:36,598
In life,grief can look like a lot of things
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that bear little resemblanceto ''sharp sorrow''.
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''You're not missing much.
New York smells like pee.''
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00:00:49,516 --> 00:00:50,949
[Lexie laughs]
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God, l hate them. [grunts]
15
00:00:53,620 --> 00:00:57,852
More pain?
Your CT results should be back soon.
16
00:00:57,891 --> 00:00:59,825
l'm fine.
17
00:01:00,827 --> 00:01:03,261
You should go home tonight.
18
00:01:03,296 --> 00:01:07,027
You can call off the 24-hour
suicide watch, you know. Honestly.
19
00:01:07,067 --> 00:01:09,399
l'm better now. l am.
20
00:01:13,373 --> 00:01:15,000
Do you know what l think?
21
00:01:15,041 --> 00:01:17,874
l think you're using me to avoid
moving in with your boyfriend.
22
00:01:17,911 --> 00:01:20,209
- [scoffs] Am not.
- l'll make you a deal.
23
00:01:20,246 --> 00:01:23,647
You move in with your boyfriend,
and l'll let you call my mum.
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00:01:23,683 --> 00:01:26,652
- Oh, mean. [chuckles]
- Chicken.
25
00:01:26,686 --> 00:01:32,420
OK, Clara, the CT shows you have
an infection in your small bowel,
26
00:01:32,459 --> 00:01:36,088
your colon's inflamed. lt's likely
something you picked up in the water,
27
00:01:36,129 --> 00:01:39,496
but it seems to have formed an abscess,
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00:01:39,532 --> 00:01:42,558
which means you need surgery right away.
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00:01:44,037 --> 00:01:45,561
No.
30
00:01:45,605 --> 00:01:49,371
- Uh, if we don't...
- No. No more surgery.
31
00:01:49,409 --> 00:01:51,775
- l'm not being cut open again.
- OK, uh...
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00:01:51,811 --> 00:01:53,870
- No.
- You just take a minute.
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00:01:53,913 --> 00:01:57,508
Take a few minutes
and l'll come back and we'll discuss it.
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00:01:58,518 --> 00:02:03,615
Um... Start her on pre-op
antibiotics and book an OR.
35
00:02:06,693 --> 00:02:09,560
What are the options?
Can you give me drugs, can you...?
36
00:02:09,596 --> 00:02:13,157
No. You need surgery.
But it's a simple procedure,
37
00:02:13,199 --> 00:02:17,158
- and if it goes as planned...
- My boat ride didn't go as planned.
38
00:02:17,237 --> 00:02:20,434
So... tell me.
39
00:02:20,473 --> 00:02:22,498
Worst case.
40
00:02:25,512 --> 00:02:29,312
Well, uh, worst case is...
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00:02:29,382 --> 00:02:32,408
...we'd have to take out part of
your colon and give you a colostomy bag.
42
00:02:32,452 --> 00:02:34,147
Colostomy bag?
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00:02:35,288 --> 00:02:39,088
A poo bag, outside your body?
My granddad had one of those, it was...
44
00:02:39,159 --> 00:02:43,596
- No, it's a small, small possibility.
- No. No poo bag.
45
00:02:43,630 --> 00:02:46,224
- No surgery.
- The infection will kill you, Clara.
46
00:02:46,266 --> 00:02:49,394
No! No more surgery.
47
00:02:49,802 --> 00:02:51,429
No.
48
00:02:56,543 --> 00:02:59,273
We tried pain meds,
treated him for pyelonephritis,
49
00:02:59,345 --> 00:03:02,371
but it could be something more serious,
so we did a CMG.
50
00:03:02,415 --> 00:03:05,248
You did a CMG for a UTl?
Why would you even look for...?
51
00:03:05,285 --> 00:03:07,810
Because we were out of ideas!
The CMG was negative
52
00:03:07,854 --> 00:03:10,220
so we went back to
a possible neurological cause.
53
00:03:10,256 --> 00:03:12,850
So if we could get a better look,
if you could give us permission
54
00:03:12,892 --> 00:03:15,793
to get a 3D MRl,
we could maybe, just possibly...
55
00:03:15,862 --> 00:03:18,922
This kid's been in the ER
four times in the last three weeks.
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00:03:18,965 --> 00:03:21,365
The pain meds aren't working.
Why can't we...?
57
00:03:21,401 --> 00:03:23,631
- Five thousand dollars, Karev.
- Sir?
58
00:03:23,670 --> 00:03:27,436
That's how much you or Dr. Robbins
has to put up to cover that scan.
59
00:03:27,473 --> 00:03:30,533
Otherwise, you can come with me
to my board meeting this afternoon
60
00:03:30,577 --> 00:03:34,673
and explain why you're running
this hospital like it's a charity.
61
00:03:37,517 --> 00:03:41,248
- Dude, are you crying?
- l have authority issues.
62
00:03:41,854 --> 00:03:43,719
Walk away, Karev.
63
00:03:49,896 --> 00:03:52,626
Where do you get off
killing my patients, Yang?
64
00:03:52,665 --> 00:03:54,599
- Killing?
- You take it upon yourself
65
00:03:54,634 --> 00:03:58,070
to talk that girl out of life-saving
surgery, you're killing her.
66
00:03:58,104 --> 00:03:59,594
l didn't talk her...
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00:03:59,639 --> 00:04:02,802
She had questions about the surgery.
You left the room.
68
00:04:02,842 --> 00:04:07,074
l left the room to give a very fragile,
very distraught patient
69
00:04:07,113 --> 00:04:09,707
time and space to accept
what's being asked of her.
70
00:04:09,749 --> 00:04:13,583
Then, and only then would l have
discussed the possible risks with,
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00:04:13,620 --> 00:04:16,987
l'm certain, more tact and sensitivity
than you have ever displayed
72
00:04:17,023 --> 00:04:18,957
- in the time l've known you.
- She asked...
73
00:04:18,992 --> 00:04:22,621
l don't care what she asked you,
and if she asks you anything else,
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00:04:22,662 --> 00:04:26,120
your only answer will be,
''Let me ask my attending.''
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00:04:35,942 --> 00:04:39,002
These are good.
Do they sell these in the cafeteria?
76
00:04:39,045 --> 00:04:40,273
- No.
- No.
77
00:04:40,346 --> 00:04:43,873
- Those are the cancer pops.
- Why do cancer people get all the fun?
78
00:04:48,154 --> 00:04:49,314
How do you feel, lz?
79
00:04:49,389 --> 00:04:52,756
Not looking forward to the hurling,
but l feel OK, l feel good.
80
00:04:52,792 --> 00:04:54,919
Bailey's on some sort of rampage.
81
00:04:54,961 --> 00:04:58,021
[chuckles] l think it's
Post-O'Malley Stress Disorder.
82
00:05:00,433 --> 00:05:03,163
- She's not dealing with grief.
- Sounds like Owen's shrink.
83
00:05:03,202 --> 00:05:07,662
Owen's shrink is withholding sex.
So she is grumpy
84
00:05:07,707 --> 00:05:10,039
- and inappropriate.
- [lzzie] ls Derek doing that, too?
85
00:05:10,076 --> 00:05:12,874
- Withholding sex?
- Why would Derek withhold sex?
86
00:05:12,912 --> 00:05:16,575
Alex is withholding everything.
lt's like he's afraid,
87
00:05:16,649 --> 00:05:19,550
- but l don't know what he's afraid of.
- Afraid of cancer sex.
88
00:05:19,585 --> 00:05:21,644
- [Meredith] Cristina!
- He doesn't want a cancer pop.
89
00:05:21,721 --> 00:05:23,882
- Cristina!
- Just shut the hell up.
90
00:05:23,923 --> 00:05:27,415
- l'm not contagious, Cristina.
- l know that.
91
00:05:27,460 --> 00:05:30,258
l would totally have sex with you.
92
00:05:31,764 --> 00:05:34,631
- Really? Nothing?
- No.
93
00:05:34,701 --> 00:05:36,896
- You don't even want a drawer?
- No.
94
00:05:36,936 --> 00:05:39,837
- A toothbrush? Change of panties?
- No.
95
00:05:39,872 --> 00:05:43,865
- Damn. l like your panties.
- l am trying to focus.
96
00:05:43,943 --> 00:05:46,912
l'm becoming a resident today.
l need to focus.
97
00:05:46,946 --> 00:05:50,074
l'm across the street from the hospital.
Crash here sometimes,
98
00:05:50,116 --> 00:05:53,745
- you'll get a jump on surgeries.
- OK, OK. Which one?
99
00:05:53,786 --> 00:05:56,550
My first day at Mercy West.
l wanna look nice, you know,
100
00:05:56,589 --> 00:06:00,252
serious, talented, hardcore,
not someone you push around.
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00:06:00,326 --> 00:06:03,921
Nice, but hot. Like me.
102
00:06:05,465 --> 00:06:08,093
- That one.
- Really? l thought this one.
103
00:06:08,134 --> 00:06:10,830
Too hot. Better for a date. That one.
104
00:06:10,870 --> 00:06:13,862
OK. Here. Eh, thanks.
105
00:06:13,906 --> 00:06:14,930
[Callie groans]
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00:06:24,417 --> 00:06:26,851
OK. OK.
107
00:06:26,886 --> 00:06:28,717
- Less hot?
- Less hot.
108
00:06:28,755 --> 00:06:30,882
OK. Good.
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00:06:30,923 --> 00:06:32,618
Thanks. Wish me luck.
110
00:06:32,658 --> 00:06:36,458
Or not luck,
'cause l'm all talented and hardcore.
111
00:06:36,496 --> 00:06:38,623
You're an attending.
Go kick some ass.
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00:06:39,665 --> 00:06:41,326
[giggles]
113
00:06:43,035 --> 00:06:44,764
So, um...
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00:06:45,905 --> 00:06:50,672
Did you forget to mention
that your hot, hardcore ex
115
00:06:50,710 --> 00:06:53,907
sex friend lives
right across the hall?
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00:06:53,946 --> 00:06:57,177
- Did l?
- Yeah. Yeah, you did.
117
00:06:58,084 --> 00:07:00,552
And it is only under my tenure as chief
118
00:07:00,586 --> 00:07:04,716
that Seattle Grace has grown
into one of the most renowned,
119
00:07:04,791 --> 00:07:08,784
lauded and sought after
surgical centers in the country.
120
00:07:08,861 --> 00:07:11,625
Replacing me... no.
121
00:07:11,664 --> 00:07:14,656
Disrupting that process
would be an epic mistake.
122
00:07:14,700 --> 00:07:18,466
lt is for that reason
that l stand before you today
123
00:07:18,504 --> 00:07:20,335
and say with the utmost confidence
124
00:07:20,373 --> 00:07:24,104
that there is no one
who understands and cares more
125
00:07:24,143 --> 00:07:26,703
- about Seattle Grace than...
- [horn honks, tires screech]
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00:07:28,147 --> 00:07:29,978
- Than me.
- [hubcap clatters]
127
00:07:32,885 --> 00:07:35,115
[Richard]
Look, this is ridiculous. l'm fine.
128
00:07:35,154 --> 00:07:38,590
lt's a sprained ankle.
And l have a meeting l have to get to.
129
00:07:38,624 --> 00:07:41,354
- Look, l said l'm fine.
- Chief?
130
00:07:41,427 --> 00:07:44,260
- Torres, thank God.
- [Callie] You were in a car accident?
131
00:07:44,330 --> 00:07:47,993
Yeah. lt was minor.
l ran a red light. l was distracted.
132
00:07:48,034 --> 00:07:52,027
l am fine. Can we make this quick?
l have a meeting with the board.
133
00:07:52,071 --> 00:07:55,165
Hmm? OK. Let's see.
134
00:07:55,208 --> 00:07:56,266
Ooh!
135
00:07:56,943 --> 00:07:59,673
Ooh, l don't know, sir.
This lac looks pretty deep.
136
00:07:59,712 --> 00:08:05,207
You'll definitely need stitches.
And the ankle... Oh, yikes.
137
00:08:05,918 --> 00:08:09,285
- Yeah. You could need surgery.
- lt's a sprain, Torres. [groans]
138
00:08:09,322 --> 00:08:12,189
- You two know each other?
- Yeah.
139
00:08:12,258 --> 00:08:15,523
Dr. Webber and l go way back.
We worked together for...
140
00:08:15,595 --> 00:08:17,426
What was it? Five, six years? Yeah.
141
00:08:17,530 --> 00:08:20,124
l hate to say it, but you
have to have that lac repaired.
142
00:08:20,166 --> 00:08:23,397
Being a teaching hospital,
not to mention Dr. McKee's first day,
143
00:08:23,436 --> 00:08:27,964
l have to let him work you up, so...
You know how to do sutures, right?
144
00:08:29,175 --> 00:08:31,575
- Damn straight.
- Great.
145
00:08:31,611 --> 00:08:32,976
Good seeing you, chief.
146
00:08:33,012 --> 00:08:34,343
[stammers]
147
00:08:34,380 --> 00:08:37,816
She's... She's just kidding
about this being my first day.
148
00:08:37,850 --> 00:08:39,010
lt's... lt's my eighth.
149
00:08:40,887 --> 00:08:42,912
What kind of sutures are you using?
150
00:08:42,955 --> 00:08:44,320
- Uh... 3-0 nylon.
- No, no, no.
151
00:08:44,390 --> 00:08:46,915
Use DERMABOND.
Takes less time and heals quicker.
152
00:08:46,959 --> 00:08:50,156
Yeah, l know, but, like,
budget cuts, you know?
153
00:08:52,732 --> 00:08:56,896
You like working
in this place, Dr., um... McKee?
154
00:08:56,969 --> 00:08:59,130
- You think it's a strong program?
- lt rocks.
155
00:08:59,171 --> 00:09:02,868
Like, day eight and l'm doing
unsupervised procedures. Not too shabby.
156
00:09:03,476 --> 00:09:07,242
Hmm... Not too shabby.
157
00:09:12,418 --> 00:09:14,818
[footsteps approaching]
158
00:09:19,725 --> 00:09:22,125
He trained at Northwestern
and then at Harvard.
159
00:09:22,161 --> 00:09:26,359
He grew up five miles away from here.
Not rich, not poor.
160
00:09:26,399 --> 00:09:30,130
Comfortable and well loved
by his parents, but, um...
161
00:09:30,169 --> 00:09:32,467
...itching to do something
more with his life.
162
00:09:32,505 --> 00:09:34,666
Which is when he enlisted
at the age of...
163
00:09:34,740 --> 00:09:36,708
Cristina, this is not a book report.
164
00:09:38,945 --> 00:09:42,312
l am trying to explain to Dr. Wyatt
that l know things about you.
165
00:09:42,348 --> 00:09:44,873
- Cristina...
- Wait! He knows things about me, too,
166
00:09:44,984 --> 00:09:47,316
if that's what you were gonna say.
We talk all the time.
167
00:09:48,955 --> 00:09:49,979
Honey?
168
00:09:51,457 --> 00:09:54,893
- [scoffs] ''Honey?''
- [Dr. Wyatt] Cristina, let me be clear.
169
00:09:54,927 --> 00:09:58,021
lt's not just that l want the two of you
to get to know each other.
170
00:09:58,064 --> 00:10:00,658
lt's that l want Owen
to feel comfortable with you.
171
00:10:00,733 --> 00:10:02,223
Oh, he is comfortable with me.
172
00:10:07,306 --> 00:10:11,538
lt's fine. You can talk to her.
lt's fine.
173
00:10:12,244 --> 00:10:15,270
OK, Cristina, um...
174
00:10:15,314 --> 00:10:17,544
He talks to you.
He's comfortable with you.
175
00:10:17,583 --> 00:10:20,108
Does he talk to you about his trauma?
176
00:10:22,788 --> 00:10:25,154
Does Owen talk to you about the war?
177
00:10:26,125 --> 00:10:29,856
Does he talk to you about the incident
between you two?
178
00:10:29,929 --> 00:10:31,055
The choking?
179
00:10:33,933 --> 00:10:38,097
Owen's post-traumatic stress is fed
180
00:10:38,137 --> 00:10:41,800
by his avoidance of talking
about anything in the war.
181
00:10:41,874 --> 00:10:44,138
ln order to improve, to heal,
182
00:10:44,210 --> 00:10:47,543
he's going to have to start
talking about it.
183
00:10:47,580 --> 00:10:49,377
To you, and to me.
184
00:10:50,616 --> 00:10:55,986
And my concern is if you get lost
in the lust of it all,
185
00:10:56,022 --> 00:10:58,456
he won't have to make a start.
186
00:10:58,491 --> 00:11:01,051
He won't have any reason to.
187
00:11:01,160 --> 00:11:04,687
He'll feel that he has everything
he needs, until he doesn't.
188
00:11:06,866 --> 00:11:11,428
So l'm asking you... to wait.
189
00:11:19,445 --> 00:11:23,404
- Finished.
- [gasping] Read it back to me.
190
00:11:23,482 --> 00:11:27,384
''Hi, Mom. Please prepare yourself.
This is gonna be difficult to read.
191
00:11:27,420 --> 00:11:29,547
- l've been in an accident.''
- That's not what l said.
192
00:11:29,588 --> 00:11:32,921
- ''l've suffered terrible injuries...''
- You can't send that.
193
00:11:32,992 --> 00:11:36,223
''l'm suffering from an infection
which l've refused to treat,
194
00:11:36,262 --> 00:11:39,231
so l'm gonna die soon.
Please come quickly, Mom,
195
00:11:39,298 --> 00:11:42,597
and if l'm gone before you get here, l
wanted to tell you how much l love you.''
196
00:11:42,668 --> 00:11:45,228
- Stop it.
- ''Thank you for making me
197
00:11:45,271 --> 00:11:47,739
- from scratch.''
- You bitch! You're a bitch!
198
00:11:47,773 --> 00:11:51,937
l can hit the call button and have
the nurses take you into surgery.
199
00:11:51,977 --> 00:11:54,537
- Or l can hit send. That's the deal.
- l will sue you.
200
00:11:54,647 --> 00:11:58,481
- l will sue you and this hospital.
- No, you won't. You'll be dead.
201
00:12:00,920 --> 00:12:02,387
Please.
202
00:12:03,489 --> 00:12:06,219
- Please.
- [call button dinging]
203
00:12:07,693 --> 00:12:09,661
Hello, the nurses
said you called for me?
204
00:12:09,729 --> 00:12:11,856
This is Andy.
205
00:12:11,897 --> 00:12:13,524
Andy Michaelson.
206
00:12:13,566 --> 00:12:18,731
- l'm sorry, have l treated you before?
- Dr. Arizona Robbins referred us.
207
00:12:19,505 --> 00:12:21,234
Oh, Andy!
208
00:12:21,340 --> 00:12:24,468
- You're the kid with the...
- With the thing no one can diagnose?
209
00:12:24,510 --> 00:12:28,276
- Yeah, that's us.
- Dr. Robbins sent you here
210
00:12:28,314 --> 00:12:31,647
- to Mercy West because...?
- These are copies of Andy's paperwork
211
00:12:31,684 --> 00:12:32,776
from Seattle Grace.
212
00:12:34,754 --> 00:12:36,654
We don't sleep anymore.
213
00:12:36,722 --> 00:12:40,886
We basically just go to the hospital.
And l don't know what else to do.
214
00:12:40,926 --> 00:12:42,860
- l feel like a terrible mother.
- Mom.
215
00:12:42,928 --> 00:12:46,989
l feel like a terrible mother
because l'm supposed to...
216
00:12:47,032 --> 00:12:49,933
l'm supposed to do something.
And l can't, you know?
217
00:12:49,969 --> 00:12:53,928
l didn't go to medical school.
l majored in freaking history.
218
00:12:53,973 --> 00:12:56,908
You're the doctors, you know?
You're the doctors.
219
00:12:57,009 --> 00:13:00,172
And, basically, all we've been
doing up to this point, any of us,
220
00:13:00,246 --> 00:13:03,181
is getting my kid
strung out on pain meds.
221
00:13:03,249 --> 00:13:05,114
- Mom, stop.
- l can't, Andy!
222
00:13:05,184 --> 00:13:07,118
l can't stop.
223
00:13:08,220 --> 00:13:10,211
We don't sleep.
224
00:13:10,923 --> 00:13:12,788
He can't sleep.
225
00:13:12,825 --> 00:13:16,158
We can't sleep.
226
00:13:16,195 --> 00:13:18,254
And l'm scared.
227
00:13:18,297 --> 00:13:24,167
And Dr. Robbins said that what she needs
you to give us is a 3D MRl of his spine.
228
00:13:24,236 --> 00:13:28,400
She said you wouldn't want to 'cause
there's no indication or whatever,
229
00:13:28,474 --> 00:13:30,806
but she says that's what he needs.
230
00:13:31,777 --> 00:13:33,608
Please.
231
00:13:34,246 --> 00:13:37,647
l can't be this useless.
And you know what? Neither can you.
232
00:13:39,652 --> 00:13:40,949
Please.
233
00:13:43,989 --> 00:13:46,423
That's a lot of necrotic small bowel.
234
00:13:46,492 --> 00:13:49,825
- Can you save any of it?
- [Bailey] Yesterday, l could have.
235
00:13:49,895 --> 00:13:53,262
Yesterday, this would've
been a simple drainage.
236
00:13:53,299 --> 00:13:56,735
But that was before Dr. Yang
threatened my patient
237
00:13:56,802 --> 00:14:00,238
with a colostomy that, thankfully,
will not be necessary
238
00:14:00,272 --> 00:14:03,002
because it did not
actually involve the colon.
239
00:14:06,445 --> 00:14:08,879
- How can l help?
- Oh, you've done enough.
240
00:14:16,322 --> 00:14:20,088
She asked me a question.
l was right to answer it. l did my job!
241
00:14:20,125 --> 00:14:23,356
A patient asked me to disclose the risks
of a surgical procedure,
242
00:14:23,429 --> 00:14:27,126
and l am required by law
and my oath to do so.
243
00:14:27,199 --> 00:14:30,726
lf you know a way to sugar-coat
a colostomy bag, l'd like to hear it.
244
00:14:32,438 --> 00:14:36,636
lf you know a more respectful way
to speak to an attending surgeon,
245
00:14:36,709 --> 00:14:40,805
l'd like to hear that!
Until you do, you don't talk to me.
246
00:14:40,880 --> 00:14:42,973
You're off my service.
247
00:14:44,250 --> 00:14:46,810
OK, seriously?
What is your problem?
248
00:14:55,728 --> 00:14:58,424
More suits?
lt's freaking people out.
249
00:14:58,497 --> 00:15:03,764
Talk of downsizing, corporate takeover,
rumors that Webber's jumping ship.
250
00:15:03,802 --> 00:15:06,396
You've got the chief's ear.
What's he got planned?
251
00:15:07,273 --> 00:15:09,468
- [man] Here's the test.
- [woman] Thank you.
252
00:15:10,976 --> 00:15:13,809
He's retiring.
They're making me chief.
253
00:15:13,913 --> 00:15:16,040
- No!
- Yeah.
254
00:15:16,081 --> 00:15:18,208
- Really?
- Yeah.
255
00:15:18,284 --> 00:15:20,946
- Really? Wow.
- Yep. Mm-hmm.
256
00:15:21,020 --> 00:15:23,250
l mean, the chief
never said anything to me.
257
00:15:23,289 --> 00:15:25,951
l would've fought you hard for that.
258
00:15:26,058 --> 00:15:28,288
But hell, l guess
if that's what he wants,
259
00:15:28,360 --> 00:15:30,385
congratulations are in order.
260
00:15:34,500 --> 00:15:36,195
Wait. That was...
261
00:15:36,235 --> 00:15:39,033
- You're messing with me?
- lt's just too easy.
262
00:15:39,104 --> 00:15:41,004
You got a mean streak, you know that?
263
00:15:41,040 --> 00:15:42,302
- Yeah.
- Mean!
264
00:15:44,877 --> 00:15:49,405
- Seriously, what's going on?
- l have no idea.
265
00:15:51,884 --> 00:15:53,317
[sighs heavily]
266
00:15:54,320 --> 00:15:56,550
[keys jangling]
267
00:15:56,855 --> 00:16:00,951
Oh... l have wine. White and red.
268
00:16:00,993 --> 00:16:04,053
And l have cigarettes.
Which is awful, l know.
269
00:16:04,129 --> 00:16:08,327
l only smoke them very occasionally
when l know l'm gonna be in trouble.
270
00:16:08,367 --> 00:16:10,096
- Like now.
- lt was inappropriate.
271
00:16:10,169 --> 00:16:12,933
Not to mention
manipulative and stupid.
272
00:16:13,005 --> 00:16:14,870
- You smoke?
- l know. Listen, l know.
273
00:16:14,940 --> 00:16:17,374
You have every right to be mad,
l ran out of options.
274
00:16:17,409 --> 00:16:19,707
lt's expensive!
There was no indication!
275
00:16:19,778 --> 00:16:23,043
There's a reason Webber
turned you down!
276
00:16:23,082 --> 00:16:26,950
- So you didn't do it.
- Of course l did it, Arizona.
277
00:16:26,986 --> 00:16:29,978
- Thank you.
- No. Don't thank me yet.
278
00:16:30,089 --> 00:16:32,887
- The scan didn't show anything.
- What? Come on. Nothing?
279
00:16:32,925 --> 00:16:34,415
No.
280
00:16:35,627 --> 00:16:37,390
That looks a little funny to me.
281
00:16:37,463 --> 00:16:40,864
l thought so too,
but the radiologist said it's normal.
282
00:16:41,867 --> 00:16:43,562
OK, all right. Here.
283
00:16:45,004 --> 00:16:48,531
Was there anything
peculiar about his H&P?
284
00:16:56,949 --> 00:16:58,439
[laughter]
285
00:16:58,484 --> 00:16:59,849
- [Derek] Oh!
- [glass breaking]
286
00:16:59,885 --> 00:17:02,115
Sorry! Sorry!
287
00:17:03,188 --> 00:17:05,884
- Sorry! Sorry, we're sorry.
- Sorry!
288
00:17:05,958 --> 00:17:09,018
We'll be sure to
clean the countertop.
289
00:17:09,061 --> 00:17:10,119
[laughs]
290
00:17:10,162 --> 00:17:13,962
You didn't used to do this before.
And now it's kind of all the time.
291
00:17:13,999 --> 00:17:16,991
- Everywhere. And...
- You know, it's...
292
00:17:17,102 --> 00:17:18,831
We're married now.
293
00:17:18,871 --> 00:17:21,965
Things have changed a little.
But sorry about the countertop.
294
00:17:23,842 --> 00:17:27,107
So you guys are... That's it?
The Post-it? That's for real?
295
00:17:27,179 --> 00:17:29,739
Yeah. That's for real.
296
00:17:30,949 --> 00:17:32,473
- [laughter]
- [gagging]
297
00:17:42,361 --> 00:17:45,558
- What are you reading?
- This patient l'm trying to diagnose.
298
00:17:45,597 --> 00:17:48,930
- lt's driving me nuts.
- So take a break. l miss you.
299
00:17:48,967 --> 00:17:52,334
- Well... l'm right here.
- [lzzie] No, you're not.
300
00:17:53,539 --> 00:17:55,939
You're here,
but you're not here, and l miss you.
301
00:17:55,974 --> 00:17:58,807
lz, come on, l'm trying to work.
302
00:18:03,682 --> 00:18:05,343
l'm wishing for a brain tumor.
303
00:18:07,019 --> 00:18:10,614
l'm wishing, all the time, for a giant
tumor that would press on my brain
304
00:18:10,656 --> 00:18:12,920
and make me hallucinate George.
305
00:18:14,226 --> 00:18:16,751
So that l could talk to him again.
306
00:18:16,829 --> 00:18:19,491
So l could laugh with him again. l...
307
00:18:22,101 --> 00:18:24,160
l miss him.
308
00:18:24,236 --> 00:18:26,602
So much. l miss him all the time.
309
00:18:26,705 --> 00:18:29,697
And l just want to feel better,
even for a minute.
310
00:18:29,741 --> 00:18:33,006
l just want to be a person
who isn't wishing for a brain tumor.
311
00:18:33,045 --> 00:18:35,639
Just for one minute.
312
00:18:35,714 --> 00:18:38,547
And l can't drink
because of the cancer meds,
313
00:18:38,617 --> 00:18:42,917
l don't do drugs, l can't even work.
l don't have any distractions.
314
00:18:44,089 --> 00:18:46,250
l'm sad.
315
00:18:46,291 --> 00:18:48,054
And l miss George. So please...
316
00:18:49,695 --> 00:18:53,131
Please, come inside
and help me feel better.
317
00:18:57,569 --> 00:18:59,662
''l miss George.''
318
00:18:59,705 --> 00:19:02,902
Nice. Real seductive.
319
00:19:28,000 --> 00:19:29,058
[knock on door]
320
00:19:30,569 --> 00:19:32,002
Oh. Hey. ls Mark around?
321
00:19:32,037 --> 00:19:34,301
- He's in the shower.
- Oh, thanks.
322
00:19:36,775 --> 00:19:40,677
Hey, have you heard anything
about what's happening with the chief?
323
00:19:40,712 --> 00:19:43,476
There's all these rumors
floating around Mercy West,
324
00:19:43,515 --> 00:19:46,678
like he might be coming to work for us.
That'd not go well for me.
325
00:19:46,752 --> 00:19:48,982
l haven't heard.
l'll check with Derek.
326
00:19:49,054 --> 00:19:51,488
- Thanks.
- Can you hand me the shampoo?
327
00:19:51,557 --> 00:19:53,525
- Thank you.
- Mm-hmm.
328
00:19:58,830 --> 00:20:01,060
Are you really gay?
329
00:20:01,099 --> 00:20:06,196
Like, how gay are you
on a scale of one to...
330
00:20:06,271 --> 00:20:09,206
...gay? 'Cause that's my boyfriend.
331
00:20:09,241 --> 00:20:12,472
ln the shower.
My hot, hot, naked boyfriend.
332
00:20:12,544 --> 00:20:15,172
And l... How gay are you?
333
00:20:15,247 --> 00:20:17,841
l'm sorry. lt's...
334
00:20:17,883 --> 00:20:19,714
l've known Mark a while and...
335
00:20:19,751 --> 00:20:22,219
But l'll... try not to do that again.
336
00:20:22,254 --> 00:20:24,552
The naked in the shower thing.
337
00:20:24,590 --> 00:20:27,150
Or the you half-naked
in the hallway thing.
338
00:20:27,226 --> 00:20:29,922
'Cause even if you really are gay,
he's not.
339
00:20:29,995 --> 00:20:32,793
And... and you're hot.
340
00:20:38,070 --> 00:20:40,368
He doesn't look at my boobs anymore.
341
00:20:40,472 --> 00:20:45,068
The first thing he used to look at
when l walked in anywhere
342
00:20:45,110 --> 00:20:47,544
was my boobs.
343
00:20:47,613 --> 00:20:50,639
He doesn't look anymore.
Not since he met you.
344
00:20:52,017 --> 00:20:54,986
- OK?
- OK.
345
00:21:00,759 --> 00:21:04,388
- [Richard] Shepherd?
- You're a hard man to track down.
346
00:21:04,429 --> 00:21:06,954
- l'm busy, as you know.
- Scoping out Mercy West?
347
00:21:06,999 --> 00:21:11,333
You planning on jumping ship?
Because l assume, as a friend,
348
00:21:11,370 --> 00:21:13,429
you'd tell me anything l need to know.
349
00:21:13,472 --> 00:21:17,101
- Those are rumors, Derek.
- There are a lot of rumors.
350
00:21:17,175 --> 00:21:20,667
- And Jennings isn't answering my calls.
- Why are you calling Jennings?
351
00:21:20,746 --> 00:21:23,544
l told you l'd fill you in when
there was something to tell.
352
00:21:23,582 --> 00:21:25,607
You feel the need to go
behind my back...
353
00:21:25,651 --> 00:21:28,984
Behind your back?
Behind your back?
354
00:21:29,054 --> 00:21:31,579
l'm the one who's got your back.
355
00:21:31,657 --> 00:21:33,215
Don't you forget that.
356
00:21:36,228 --> 00:21:38,458
- Dr. Shepherd, have a minute?
- Yes. For what?
357
00:21:38,497 --> 00:21:42,024
A kid with a tethered spinal cord.
l thought tethered spinal cord.
358
00:21:42,067 --> 00:21:45,764
You're not gonna see it on there.
l need another test to confirm.
359
00:21:45,804 --> 00:21:48,136
A tethered cord's rare.
He have spina bifida?
360
00:21:48,173 --> 00:21:50,573
- No.
- Lower back lesions? Hyperreflexia?
361
00:21:50,609 --> 00:21:54,568
No and no. But the pain is aggravated
when he extends or flexes his spine.
362
00:21:54,613 --> 00:21:57,810
l know what you're gonna say.
A tethered cord shows up on the MRl.
363
00:21:57,883 --> 00:22:01,148
But what if it didn't? What if
what this kid needs is not an MRl,
364
00:22:01,219 --> 00:22:04,746
- but a more specific CT myelogram.
- Maybe.
365
00:22:04,823 --> 00:22:06,723
- Order one.
- l can't.
366
00:22:06,758 --> 00:22:10,660
Because if l did, l'd get fired
and l really like my job.
367
00:22:10,729 --> 00:22:14,165
- Did the chief deny that request?
- Several times.
368
00:22:14,232 --> 00:22:16,530
You should've led with the part
about the chief.
369
00:22:16,601 --> 00:22:17,966
Come on.
370
00:22:18,036 --> 00:22:20,163
- [Lexie] You're doing great.
- You're up, girl.
371
00:22:20,205 --> 00:22:23,436
Who'd think standing could be so hard?
You're doing awesome.
372
00:22:23,508 --> 00:22:24,873
- Awesome.
- Put me down.
373
00:22:24,910 --> 00:22:27,811
- Let's go a couple more seconds...
- Put me down.
374
00:22:27,879 --> 00:22:31,337
- That was great.
- Take a sec and go again for me, OK?
375
00:22:31,383 --> 00:22:33,374
- No.
- l know, Clara.
376
00:22:33,418 --> 00:22:35,613
This is where the hard part begins.
377
00:22:48,967 --> 00:22:51,231
[Arizona] McDreamy.
378
00:22:51,269 --> 00:22:54,261
- l'm sorry?
- l get it now.
379
00:22:54,339 --> 00:22:57,137
The whole McDreamy thing.
l didn't get it before,
380
00:22:57,175 --> 00:22:59,268
but now... l get it.
381
00:23:00,645 --> 00:23:02,772
You know they call you that, right?
382
00:23:02,814 --> 00:23:04,042
Yes.
383
00:23:05,784 --> 00:23:08,947
l'm involved, by the way, in case
you thought l was coming onto you,
384
00:23:09,020 --> 00:23:12,421
because l was not.
Plus, l heard that you got married.
385
00:23:12,457 --> 00:23:16,052
- So congratulations.
- Yes, thank you.
386
00:23:16,094 --> 00:23:19,530
You wrote some hokey crap on a
Post-it note in the resident's lounge.
387
00:23:19,564 --> 00:23:22,533
Sorry, but until you're sweating it out
in a morning coat
388
00:23:22,601 --> 00:23:26,196
with a ball of white taffeta coming
at you, you're not really married.
389
00:23:26,238 --> 00:23:30,174
OK. Well, l've consummated mine.
l consummate mine all the time.
390
00:23:30,208 --> 00:23:33,371
How's that going for you, Karev?
Girls talk.
391
00:23:33,412 --> 00:23:36,711
You might wanna consider that
next time you judge my Post-it.
392
00:23:39,217 --> 00:23:40,377
[Meredith sighs]
393
00:23:43,688 --> 00:23:45,553
l haven't cried yet.
394
00:23:47,092 --> 00:23:49,390
l'm using work and sex
as a distraction.
395
00:23:49,461 --> 00:23:52,123
And l think it's working for me.
396
00:23:53,498 --> 00:23:56,092
Have you seen the girl, Amanda,
397
00:23:56,134 --> 00:24:00,434
sitting outside the hospital
on that bench all day long?
398
00:24:00,472 --> 00:24:05,034
l miss sex. l miss it so much.
399
00:24:09,481 --> 00:24:11,142
What?
400
00:24:11,817 --> 00:24:13,682
Mer!
401
00:24:13,718 --> 00:24:16,278
l'm worried about Clara.
She's depressed.
402
00:24:16,354 --> 00:24:18,515
Like, a whole new level of depressed.
403
00:24:18,557 --> 00:24:21,219
- l don't know what to do.
- You talking about Ceviche?
404
00:24:21,259 --> 00:24:22,351
That...
405
00:24:23,929 --> 00:24:27,194
Oh, my God! That's...
That is so rude!
406
00:24:27,299 --> 00:24:30,598
Ceviche? That is so... That's rude.
407
00:24:30,669 --> 00:24:32,398
That... That is so rude!
408
00:24:36,708 --> 00:24:41,668
- Anyone else l can offend?
- A tethered spinal cord?
409
00:24:41,746 --> 00:24:44,544
One of the threads in his cord
is attached to his tailbone.
410
00:24:44,583 --> 00:24:46,847
Normally, the spinal cord
is free at the end,
411
00:24:46,885 --> 00:24:49,820
but with it attached,
when you grew, it started pulling.
412
00:24:49,855 --> 00:24:54,189
- Thus, the excruciating pain.
- So can we fix it? ls it fixable?
413
00:24:54,226 --> 00:24:56,786
- Microsurgery.
- l'll snip the tethered cord,
414
00:24:56,862 --> 00:24:57,988
and he'll be free of pain.
415
00:25:01,566 --> 00:25:06,128
She's not normally like this. Before
all this, she was like a normal mom.
416
00:25:06,171 --> 00:25:10,471
- Oh!
- Andy, this is a normal mom.
417
00:25:17,249 --> 00:25:21,185
- Are we waiting for Dr. Swender?
- No. Dr. Swender has
418
00:25:21,219 --> 00:25:22,777
handed you off to me.
419
00:25:24,122 --> 00:25:27,751
[scoffs] What are you,
like, second year?
420
00:25:29,561 --> 00:25:32,428
- Third.
- That's, um...
421
00:25:33,231 --> 00:25:37,463
- Can we page Dr. Swender or something?
- Stevens, this is a good thing.
422
00:25:37,502 --> 00:25:40,938
lt is. You still have cancer.
423
00:25:41,006 --> 00:25:44,305
But not enough to interest
Dr. Swender anymore.
424
00:25:44,342 --> 00:25:50,042
- lt is a good thing.
- You're saying l have JV cancer.
425
00:25:50,081 --> 00:25:54,245
[man] l'm saying your mets have shrunk
way down, and there are no new ones.
426
00:25:54,286 --> 00:25:56,345
Your protocol is working
very effectively.
427
00:25:58,857 --> 00:26:02,384
Stevens, this is about
as good as the news gets.
428
00:26:03,862 --> 00:26:08,094
- Um... So, what now?
- We're gonna use the port in your chest
429
00:26:08,166 --> 00:26:10,600
to continue with your
lL-2 regimen for now.
430
00:26:10,669 --> 00:26:14,537
And we'll continue monitoring
the progression of your disease
431
00:26:14,573 --> 00:26:17,872
with PET scans
every three to six months.
432
00:26:17,909 --> 00:26:21,072
ls there some kind
of timeline on this, or...?
433
00:26:21,146 --> 00:26:24,547
[man] Your wife is living
with cancer, Dr. Karev.
434
00:26:24,583 --> 00:26:26,710
Right now, the cancer
has stopped growing.
435
00:26:26,751 --> 00:26:31,154
With a cancer this aggressive,
that's pretty stunning success.
436
00:26:31,256 --> 00:26:36,319
There's no timeline.
There's just... We watch it.
437
00:26:36,361 --> 00:26:40,991
We wait.
We hope it doesn't start to grow again.
438
00:26:44,869 --> 00:26:48,532
- That's it?
- That's it.
439
00:26:59,618 --> 00:27:02,815
[Alex] l see contractions
in the anterior tibialis.
440
00:27:02,854 --> 00:27:04,845
[Derek] OK. That's the nerve root,
not the filum.
441
00:27:04,889 --> 00:27:08,256
Bipolars and the micro scissors, please.
442
00:27:12,063 --> 00:27:16,022
- Wanna make the cut?
- No. l don't need to.
443
00:27:16,134 --> 00:27:19,297
Without you, this kid
would've been a chronic pain patient,
444
00:27:19,371 --> 00:27:23,671
possibly addicted to pain meds.
He owes his entire future to you.
445
00:27:24,943 --> 00:27:26,137
You should make the cut.
446
00:27:29,781 --> 00:27:31,442
OK?
447
00:27:34,519 --> 00:27:36,350
OK.
448
00:27:36,755 --> 00:27:38,416
Put the scissor in...
449
00:27:43,828 --> 00:27:45,420
There. Nicely done.
450
00:27:48,667 --> 00:27:52,694
Clara, Dr. Grey says you're
still refusing your physical therapy.
451
00:27:52,737 --> 00:27:54,967
Now, l understand it's hard.
452
00:27:55,006 --> 00:27:56,837
But you have to work these muscles now
453
00:27:56,875 --> 00:28:01,312
or they will atrophy
and heal incorrectly.
454
00:28:01,379 --> 00:28:05,975
Clara, you gotta do the work.
You got to do the work now.
455
00:28:12,857 --> 00:28:16,190
Clara, l know what it is to
not want to live, to wish you'd died,
456
00:28:16,227 --> 00:28:21,221
to lose everything,
to not want to call your mother.
457
00:28:21,266 --> 00:28:24,064
Believe it or not,
l know exactly what that is.
458
00:28:24,102 --> 00:28:26,969
l have been there.
459
00:28:27,038 --> 00:28:29,131
l am back now.
460
00:28:31,543 --> 00:28:35,570
As impossible as it felt, eventually,
461
00:28:35,647 --> 00:28:37,308
l came back.
462
00:28:37,348 --> 00:28:41,114
And so can you.
You have got to do the work.
463
00:28:51,830 --> 00:28:54,526
- You have to get her admitted to Psych.
- Committed?
464
00:28:54,566 --> 00:28:57,364
- You want me to have her committed?
- Nothing more we can do.
465
00:28:57,469 --> 00:29:00,597
- You have to make that call.
- People are calling you ''Ceviche''.
466
00:29:00,672 --> 00:29:02,765
- [Owen] Dr. Grey.
- That's... You know,
467
00:29:02,807 --> 00:29:06,903
you can't go out like that, Clara,
with people calling you Ceviche.
468
00:29:06,945 --> 00:29:09,379
- Ceviche?
- Yeah. lt's a meal.
469
00:29:09,414 --> 00:29:12,406
lt's Peruvian, l think.
470
00:29:13,384 --> 00:29:15,852
lt's chopped up fish.
471
00:29:26,831 --> 00:29:29,994
[laughing]
That's really horrible, isn't it?
472
00:29:30,034 --> 00:29:32,832
lt is. lt's...
473
00:29:32,871 --> 00:29:34,668
lt's horrible.
474
00:29:40,178 --> 00:29:41,543
lt's horrible!
475
00:29:49,087 --> 00:29:51,112
[lzzie] l didn't expect this.
476
00:29:51,156 --> 00:29:55,593
They say cancer, they say stage four,
you expect to die.
477
00:29:55,627 --> 00:30:00,860
And then you start thinking, ''Maybe
l can kick it. l'll be the miracle.''
478
00:30:00,932 --> 00:30:03,230
Well, you are the miracle.
479
00:30:03,301 --> 00:30:05,929
l'm still living with cancer.
480
00:30:06,004 --> 00:30:09,940
You know, l just...
You don't expect that.
481
00:30:13,111 --> 00:30:15,204
lsn't that the girl that George saved?
482
00:30:15,246 --> 00:30:17,646
Oh, Amanda.
483
00:30:17,682 --> 00:30:20,310
- Yeah.
- What is she doing here?
484
00:30:20,351 --> 00:30:22,842
Oh, she sits there.
485
00:30:22,887 --> 00:30:25,651
Every day, all day.
486
00:30:25,757 --> 00:30:28,487
- For God's sakes.
- Where... What...?
487
00:30:31,996 --> 00:30:35,295
Get up. l mean it, get up.
488
00:30:35,400 --> 00:30:36,958
Get up!
489
00:30:37,535 --> 00:30:41,266
[sighs heavily] Now, go get a life.
490
00:30:43,908 --> 00:30:44,966
l can't.
491
00:30:48,046 --> 00:30:51,243
George was a surgeon, he had a purpose.
492
00:30:51,316 --> 00:30:56,276
He wanted to save lives and
now he doesn't get the chance.
493
00:30:56,354 --> 00:31:00,916
Now, he doesn't get the chance
to do anything anymore, but you do.
494
00:31:00,992 --> 00:31:03,153
You could go to medical school,
you know?
495
00:31:03,194 --> 00:31:06,322
You could hang out with your
freaking friends. l don't care what.
496
00:31:06,364 --> 00:31:08,958
Just go do something with your life.
497
00:31:09,000 --> 00:31:12,128
Because you have one, you lived!
498
00:31:12,170 --> 00:31:13,933
You lived and George didn't!
499
00:31:14,005 --> 00:31:15,973
And l know...
500
00:31:18,443 --> 00:31:22,607
l know that that feels horrible
501
00:31:22,647 --> 00:31:26,378
and shocking and terrifying.
502
00:31:28,019 --> 00:31:29,884
But you lived.
503
00:31:31,689 --> 00:31:34,988
So go live your freaking life.
504
00:31:38,096 --> 00:31:40,360
l... l don't know how.
505
00:31:40,431 --> 00:31:43,161
Nobody does.
506
00:31:43,201 --> 00:31:45,465
Nobody knows how.
507
00:31:46,738 --> 00:31:49,866
But, God, have enough respect
for George to figure it out.
508
00:31:49,908 --> 00:31:52,877
'Cause if l see you sitting
on this bench ever again,
509
00:31:52,911 --> 00:31:56,210
l will kick your ass
from here to Sunday.
510
00:32:15,199 --> 00:32:18,691
l can't get back on Bailey's service.
She's still not even looking at me.
511
00:32:18,770 --> 00:32:21,466
Give her time.
She was close with O'Malley...
512
00:32:21,539 --> 00:32:24,337
lt's not about O'Malley.
She's mad at me about Ceviche.
513
00:32:24,375 --> 00:32:27,310
- [laughs] You got to stop that.
- Ceviche?
514
00:32:27,412 --> 00:32:30,074
- lt's a patient.
- A boating accident victim.
515
00:32:30,148 --> 00:32:34,585
She thinks it's OK to call her
a seafood dish. ls that OK?
516
00:32:34,619 --> 00:32:38,055
- Well, it's... pretty dark.
- Come on. l'm dark?
517
00:32:38,122 --> 00:32:41,683
l'm not the one going around
choking people in their sleep.
518
00:32:49,567 --> 00:32:51,467
Too soon?
519
00:32:57,475 --> 00:33:00,342
l'm not the guy going around
choking people in their sleep.
520
00:33:00,378 --> 00:33:03,006
- l know.
- lt was a dream. l...
521
00:33:04,615 --> 00:33:07,709
l can't remember
what l was dreaming about, but...
522
00:33:08,619 --> 00:33:10,849
l was trying to save my own life.
523
00:33:13,424 --> 00:33:15,585
l wasn't trying to hurt you.
524
00:33:19,197 --> 00:33:21,961
l was...
525
00:33:22,000 --> 00:33:23,934
l was fighting for my life.
526
00:33:30,475 --> 00:33:32,170
OK.
527
00:33:35,646 --> 00:33:37,614
[Dr. Wyatt] You made a start.
528
00:33:41,285 --> 00:33:43,276
You made a start.
529
00:33:48,726 --> 00:33:52,218
- [Lexie] You have it, you have it.
- [man] You've got this.
530
00:33:54,766 --> 00:33:56,233
[all laughing]
531
00:33:56,267 --> 00:33:58,701
- Yeah, girl!
- l did it.
532
00:33:58,736 --> 00:34:00,897
- You did it.
- l did it.
533
00:34:04,876 --> 00:34:06,639
Lexie?
534
00:34:07,545 --> 00:34:09,103
Will you call my mum?
535
00:34:10,782 --> 00:34:13,512
Yeah. Yeah.
536
00:34:15,820 --> 00:34:17,845
OK, come on. Come on.
537
00:34:21,959 --> 00:34:23,790
You got it!
538
00:34:23,828 --> 00:34:26,490
[Lexie] Grief may be a thingwe all have in common...
539
00:34:28,366 --> 00:34:30,766
...but it looks different on everyone.
540
00:34:32,537 --> 00:34:34,266
[knock on door]
541
00:34:38,309 --> 00:34:39,799
Hey.
542
00:34:47,485 --> 00:34:50,420
[Mark] It isn't just deathwe have to grieve.
543
00:34:50,455 --> 00:34:51,752
It's life.
544
00:34:51,789 --> 00:34:53,484
It's loss.
545
00:34:53,558 --> 00:34:55,583
It's change.
546
00:34:57,829 --> 00:35:01,993
[Alex] And when we wonder whyit has to suck so much sometimes,
547
00:35:02,033 --> 00:35:06,163
has to hurt so bad,the thing we gotta try to remember
548
00:35:06,204 --> 00:35:07,831
is that it can turn on a dime.
549
00:35:07,872 --> 00:35:09,703
[door opening]
550
00:35:13,878 --> 00:35:16,278
- What is this?
- Take off your pants.
551
00:35:17,682 --> 00:35:19,912
lz, lz...
552
00:35:20,651 --> 00:35:23,518
Be my husband.
553
00:35:23,588 --> 00:35:26,489
Get undressed,
get into bed and hold me.
554
00:35:26,524 --> 00:35:29,891
l don't know what you're so mad about
and scared of
555
00:35:29,927 --> 00:35:32,919
because you won't talk to me,
but l'm scared, too.
556
00:35:32,997 --> 00:35:36,228
l can't... lf you won't...
557
00:35:37,068 --> 00:35:40,560
lf we're gonna have any chance
at a life together, l need you.
558
00:35:40,605 --> 00:35:42,470
Please.
559
00:35:43,975 --> 00:35:45,875
You died in my arms.
560
00:35:47,145 --> 00:35:50,046
You died in my arms! You freaking died,
561
00:35:50,114 --> 00:35:54,312
and you left instructions that
l wasn't allowed to save your life!
562
00:35:54,385 --> 00:35:58,344
You want to know what l'm scared of?
l'm scared of everything!
563
00:35:58,422 --> 00:36:01,050
l'm scared to move!
l'm scared to breathe!
564
00:36:01,125 --> 00:36:03,491
l'm scared to touch you!
565
00:36:04,562 --> 00:36:06,996
l can't lose you. l won't survive.
566
00:36:08,032 --> 00:36:09,397
And that's your fault.
567
00:36:09,433 --> 00:36:11,958
You made me love you,
made me let you in,
568
00:36:12,036 --> 00:36:14,368
and then you freakin' die in my arms!
569
00:36:18,676 --> 00:36:20,667
[Izzie] That's how you stay alive.
570
00:36:26,784 --> 00:36:29,446
When it hurts so much you can't breathe,
571
00:36:29,487 --> 00:36:31,546
that's how you survive.
572
00:36:43,234 --> 00:36:45,065
[bell rings]
573
00:36:51,676 --> 00:36:52,700
Miranda.
574
00:36:58,382 --> 00:37:00,976
[Derek] By remembering that one day,
575
00:37:01,018 --> 00:37:05,921
somehow, impossibly,you won't feel this way.
576
00:37:05,957 --> 00:37:08,221
It won't hurt this much.
577
00:37:18,636 --> 00:37:22,003
l... l am an attending
578
00:37:22,039 --> 00:37:25,941
and l am a single mother
579
00:37:25,977 --> 00:37:30,414
and l lost O'Malley and, um...
580
00:37:31,215 --> 00:37:33,183
l just can't.
581
00:37:33,251 --> 00:37:35,845
l can't care anymore.
582
00:37:37,455 --> 00:37:40,049
Stevens is not my child.
583
00:37:40,124 --> 00:37:42,684
O'Malley was not my child.
584
00:37:42,760 --> 00:37:45,752
l have to stop treating...
585
00:37:46,998 --> 00:37:50,058
l just have to stop caring so much.
586
00:37:51,769 --> 00:37:53,862
l can't keep...
587
00:37:53,904 --> 00:37:58,238
...feeling like this, not at work.
588
00:37:58,276 --> 00:38:04,010
l have to save the feeling for my son,
who needs it!
589
00:38:06,050 --> 00:38:09,144
l just can't keep giving it away here.
590
00:38:10,421 --> 00:38:11,683
l can't.
591
00:38:15,526 --> 00:38:17,357
l won't.
592
00:38:23,934 --> 00:38:27,495
[Bailey] Grief comesin its own time for everyone.
593
00:38:29,774 --> 00:38:31,503
In its own way.
594
00:38:34,645 --> 00:38:37,273
[Owen] So the best we can do,
595
00:38:37,315 --> 00:38:39,340
the best anyone can do...
596
00:38:40,618 --> 00:38:42,848
...is try for honesty.
597
00:38:43,988 --> 00:38:46,957
l don't want to hurt you again.
598
00:38:46,991 --> 00:38:49,118
My problems, they're real.
599
00:38:49,226 --> 00:38:54,289
And this... this makes us real.
lt makes my problems your problems.
600
00:38:55,333 --> 00:38:57,460
l'm afraid.
601
00:38:57,501 --> 00:38:59,526
l don't want to hurt you again.
602
00:39:03,641 --> 00:39:05,074
You can sleep in the bathtub.
603
00:39:05,743 --> 00:39:07,768
Wha... [laughs]
604
00:39:18,155 --> 00:39:21,989
[Meredith] The really crappy thing,the very worst part of grief,
605
00:39:22,026 --> 00:39:24,324
is that you can't control it.
606
00:39:29,200 --> 00:39:31,600
- What are you doing?
- We need the space.
607
00:39:38,743 --> 00:39:43,908
[Arizona] The best we can do is tryto let ourselves feel it when it comes.
608
00:39:43,981 --> 00:39:46,779
Hey. Ugh... Thank you.
609
00:39:46,817 --> 00:39:48,842
l got stuck with this intern today,
610
00:39:48,886 --> 00:39:51,878
took him four tries
to throw in a central line.
611
00:39:51,956 --> 00:39:54,186
Reminded me a little bit
of George, actually,
612
00:39:54,258 --> 00:39:56,590
when he was an intern.
613
00:39:57,795 --> 00:40:00,821
[Callie] And let it go when we can.
614
00:40:03,667 --> 00:40:09,367
[gasping, sobbing]
615
00:40:23,954 --> 00:40:25,512
Meredith.
616
00:40:42,973 --> 00:40:47,706
[Meredith] The very worst part is thatthe minute you think you're past it,
617
00:40:47,778 --> 00:40:50,770
it starts all over again.
618
00:40:56,287 --> 00:40:59,347
[Cristina] And always, every time...
619
00:40:59,390 --> 00:41:01,881
George O'Malley died.
620
00:41:04,361 --> 00:41:06,556
...it takes your breath away.
621
00:41:15,239 --> 00:41:17,799
[Meredith] There arefive stages of grief.
622
00:41:18,876 --> 00:41:20,867
They look different on all of us.
623
00:41:20,945 --> 00:41:22,810
But there are always five.
624
00:41:22,847 --> 00:41:26,874
l know you all have heard a lot
of rumors, and l'm sorry for that.
625
00:41:26,917 --> 00:41:28,179
[Alex] Denial.
626
00:41:28,252 --> 00:41:31,949
And what l'm about to say will be hard
to hear, and l'm sorry for that as well.
627
00:41:32,056 --> 00:41:33,216
[Derek] Anger.
628
00:41:33,290 --> 00:41:37,989
The economic climate is...
You all know what it is.
629
00:41:38,028 --> 00:41:42,328
ln the coming weeks,
Seattle Grace Hospital
630
00:41:42,366 --> 00:41:45,824
- will be merging with Mercy West.
- [all murmuring]
631
00:41:45,903 --> 00:41:47,461
[Bailey] Bargaining.
632
00:41:47,505 --> 00:41:51,737
[Richard] l wish l could tell you
you'll all survive the merger,
633
00:41:51,809 --> 00:41:54,175
but there are only so many jobs.
And the board and l
634
00:41:54,211 --> 00:41:55,872
have some tough choices to make.
635
00:41:55,913 --> 00:41:58,609
- [Lexie] Depression.
- l'm on your side, people.
636
00:41:59,316 --> 00:42:01,841
l'm rooting for every one of you.
637
00:42:01,886 --> 00:42:07,882
All l can say is please,
be at your very best.
638
00:42:17,801 --> 00:42:19,632
[Richard] Acceptance.
51403
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