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1
00:00:08,876 --> 00:00:10,344
DADDY, WHAT'S UP WITH JOE
THIS MORNING?
2
00:00:10,511 --> 00:00:12,180
WHAT? WHAT DO YOU MEAN?
3
00:00:12,346 --> 00:00:13,381
HEY, BUDDY.
YOU GOT A GOOD NIGHT'S--
4
00:00:13,547 --> 00:00:16,850
BREAKFAST READY YET?
5
00:00:17,017 --> 00:00:19,353
UH...YOU OKAY?
6
00:00:19,520 --> 00:00:21,989
YEAH. NEVER BETTER.
7
00:00:25,593 --> 00:00:27,495
DADDY, WHY IS HE WINKING
AT US?
8
00:00:27,661 --> 00:00:29,863
JOE, IS THERE AN INSIDE JOKE
THAT I FORGOT ABOUT?
9
00:00:30,030 --> 00:00:31,332
BECAUSE IF THERE IS,
WHATEVER IT IS...
10
00:00:31,499 --> 00:00:34,068
OKAY?
11
00:00:34,235 --> 00:00:35,536
THERE YOU GO.
12
00:00:35,703 --> 00:00:37,371
- PATTIES?
- YEP.
13
00:00:37,538 --> 00:00:40,108
PATTIES?
DO YOU EVEN KNOW WHO I AM?
14
00:00:40,274 --> 00:00:41,942
YEAH, UH,
RIGHT NOW, NO.
15
00:00:42,110 --> 00:00:44,312
LINKS.
I PREFER MY SAUSAGE LINKED.
16
00:00:44,478 --> 00:00:45,646
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
17
00:00:45,813 --> 00:00:47,515
SINCE WHEN DID YOU EVER CARE
18
00:00:47,681 --> 00:00:49,717
WHAT SHAPE YOUR BREAKFAST MEAT
COMES IN?
19
00:00:49,883 --> 00:00:51,485
SORRY.
20
00:00:51,652 --> 00:00:52,786
I'M TWO WEEKS AWAY
FROM BREAKING
21
00:00:52,953 --> 00:00:54,688
THE SCHOOL DISTRICT RECORD
22
00:00:54,855 --> 00:00:55,923
FOR CONSECUTIVE DAYS
WITHOUT AN ABSENCE.
23
00:00:56,090 --> 00:00:57,558
YOU'VE NEVER MISSED
24
00:00:57,725 --> 00:00:59,560
A DAY OF SCHOOL?
- NEVER.
25
00:00:59,727 --> 00:01:00,628
NOT EVEN THE TIME THAT
YOU BROKE YOUR LITTLE--
26
00:01:00,794 --> 00:01:01,929
NEVER!
27
00:01:02,130 --> 00:01:03,131
THE STRESS IS KILLING ME.
28
00:01:03,231 --> 00:01:04,998
LOOK, COME ON.
29
00:01:05,166 --> 00:01:06,634
THIS MUCH STRESS AT YOUR AGE
IS NOT HEALTHY.
30
00:01:06,800 --> 00:01:10,271
NEITHER ARE THESE PATTIES.
31
00:01:10,438 --> 00:01:12,373
WHY DON'T YOU JUST TAKE
A DAY OFF?
32
00:01:12,540 --> 00:01:14,175
- "A DAY OFF?"
- YEAH.
33
00:01:14,342 --> 00:01:16,377
"A DAY OFF"?
34
00:01:16,544 --> 00:01:17,778
BUT JOE, YOU GOTTA FORGET
ABOUT THIS SCHOOL RECORD THING.
35
00:01:17,945 --> 00:01:19,647
COME ON.
36
00:01:19,813 --> 00:01:21,782
YOU KNOW WHAT,
I'M GONNA CALL THE SCHOOL
37
00:01:21,949 --> 00:01:23,617
TO TELL THEM YOU'RE SICK.
WE'RE GONNA GO TO THE BEACH.
38
00:01:23,784 --> 00:01:25,586
WE'RE GONNA PLAY HOOKY.
HOW ABOUT THAT?
39
00:01:25,753 --> 00:01:27,621
BUT DAD, THAT'S TOTALLY
AGAINST THE RULES.
40
00:01:27,788 --> 00:01:29,490
JOE, SOME RULES ARE MEANT
TO BE BROKEN, RIGHT?
41
00:01:29,657 --> 00:01:30,724
AND BESIDES,
IT'S CALLED PLAYING HOOKY.
42
00:01:30,891 --> 00:01:32,460
IF IT WAS A BAD THING,
43
00:01:32,626 --> 00:01:33,961
THEY'D CALL IT
COMMITTING HOOKY.
44
00:01:34,162 --> 00:01:35,729
OKAY? YOU IN?
45
00:01:35,896 --> 00:01:37,531
- YEAH. OKAY.
- OKAY, BEAUTIFUL.
46
00:01:37,698 --> 00:01:39,600
GREAT.
- IF YOU THINK IT'S A GOOD IDEA.
47
00:01:39,767 --> 00:01:41,302
I THINK IT'S A GREAT IDEA.
COME ON, BOTH OF YOU.
48
00:01:41,469 --> 00:01:43,070
BATHING SUITS ON.
LET'S GO.
49
00:01:43,237 --> 00:01:44,838
TOTALLY,
TOTALLY UNACCEPTABLE.
50
00:01:45,005 --> 00:01:46,407
- MOM, PLEASE. GET INSIDE.
- RUDE.
51
00:01:46,574 --> 00:01:48,409
INCONSIDERATE.
SELFISH.
52
00:01:48,576 --> 00:01:52,513
ANOTHER MORNING POWER WALK
RUINED BY DOG POOP.
53
00:01:52,680 --> 00:01:54,648
THIS IS THE FOURTH TIME
THIS WEEK ON OUR LAWN.
54
00:01:54,815 --> 00:01:56,784
AND EVERYBODY KNOWS, HONEY,
55
00:01:56,950 --> 00:01:58,786
IF YOUR DOG RELEASES,
YOU GOTTA PICK UP THE PIECES.
56
00:01:58,952 --> 00:02:00,921
HMM, HMM. HMM.
57
00:02:01,088 --> 00:02:02,022
REALLY?
58
00:02:02,190 --> 00:02:03,357
OH, YEAH.
59
00:02:03,524 --> 00:02:04,692
BETTER THAN YESTERDAY'S GEM.
60
00:02:04,858 --> 00:02:06,394
"IF YOUR DOG MAKES A DOODY,
61
00:02:06,560 --> 00:02:08,762
I'M CALLING JUDGE JUDY."
- HMM.
62
00:02:08,929 --> 00:02:11,632
YOU KNOW WHAT, I'M GONNA FIND
OUT WHO'S DOING IT,
63
00:02:11,799 --> 00:02:13,201
AND I'M GONNA BRING HIM
TO JUSTICE.
64
00:02:13,367 --> 00:02:15,969
YEAH.
65
00:02:16,204 --> 00:02:17,571
SOUNDS LIKE A REAL
"POO DONE IT?"
66
00:02:17,738 --> 00:02:18,906
RIGHT HERE.
67
00:02:19,072 --> 00:02:20,808
EMILY, DON'T LEAVE ME HANGING.
68
00:02:20,974 --> 00:02:22,210
COME ON.
69
00:02:43,597 --> 00:02:44,932
JOE, JUST WASH OFF
THE BOOGIE BOARD.
70
00:02:45,098 --> 00:02:46,400
LEAVE IT OUTSIDE, OKAY?
THANK YOU.
71
00:02:46,567 --> 00:02:47,901
DAVID...
72
00:02:48,068 --> 00:02:51,004
TOWELS?
FLIP-FLOPS? SAND TOYS?
73
00:02:51,239 --> 00:02:54,041
YOUR BRONZE GLOW THAT
EVEN THE GODS WOULD ENVY?
74
00:02:54,242 --> 00:02:55,509
YOU WENT TO BEACH WITHOUT ME?
75
00:02:55,676 --> 00:02:58,279
THAT'S OUR ONE RULE.
76
00:02:58,446 --> 00:03:01,449
SOME RULES ARE MEANT
TO BE BROKEN, KEVIN.
77
00:03:01,615 --> 00:03:03,551
IN FACT,
I'M BLOWING MY NAP OFF
78
00:03:03,717 --> 00:03:06,587
AND GETTING JACKED UP
ON SUGAR.
79
00:03:06,754 --> 00:03:08,989
DON'T MAKE THIS A THING, KEVIN.
80
00:03:09,156 --> 00:03:10,691
IT'S YOUR THING.
81
00:03:10,858 --> 00:03:12,326
YOU'RE THE ONE WHO SAID,
"KEVIN, NEVER LET ME
82
00:03:12,493 --> 00:03:13,527
"GO TO BEACH WITHOUT YOU
BECAUSE I FORGET
83
00:03:13,694 --> 00:03:14,995
TO PUT SUNSCREEN ON THE KIDS."
84
00:03:15,162 --> 00:03:16,297
NO, THAT WAS THE OLD DAVID.
85
00:03:16,464 --> 00:03:17,831
YOU'LL BE HAPPY TO KNOW, KEVIN,
86
00:03:17,998 --> 00:03:20,033
I USED A BOTTLE OF SPF 30
ON JANIE
87
00:03:20,268 --> 00:03:23,937
AND ON MILKY WHITE JOE,
I PUT ON...
88
00:03:24,104 --> 00:03:26,274
STEEL SHIELD.
89
00:03:26,440 --> 00:03:29,009
YEAH, THAT'S A BUG SPRAY, DAVID.
90
00:03:29,176 --> 00:03:30,878
I DON'T KNOW IF YOU NOTICED
THE DEAD MOSQUITO
91
00:03:31,044 --> 00:03:33,347
LYING ON ITS BACK.
92
00:03:33,514 --> 00:03:35,649
I THOUGHT
IT WAS JUST SUNBATHING.
93
00:03:35,816 --> 00:03:37,885
IT WAS THE BEST DAY EVER, DAD.
94
00:03:40,754 --> 00:03:41,622
WHAT DID YOU DO TO HIM?
95
00:03:41,789 --> 00:03:42,823
I DON'T KNOW.
96
00:03:42,990 --> 00:03:44,592
HE WASN'T THAT RED IN THE CAR.
97
00:03:44,758 --> 00:03:46,427
WHOO.
98
00:03:46,594 --> 00:03:48,729
HEY, DAVID.
I GOT GREAT NEWS, MAN.
99
00:03:48,896 --> 00:03:50,664
I GOT A CALL FROM
THE "DADS WHO CARE" PEOPLE.
100
00:03:50,831 --> 00:03:52,300
AND THEIR CHARITY WOULD LIKE
TO HONOR US,
101
00:03:52,466 --> 00:03:53,601
THE CREATORS
OF {\an8}SEE DAD RUN,
102
00:03:53,767 --> 00:03:56,304
AS CARING DADS OF THE YEAR.
103
00:03:56,404 --> 00:03:58,906
WE HAVE A NATIONAL RADIO
INTERVIEW THIS SATURDAY.
104
00:03:59,072 --> 00:04:00,608
THAT'S GREAT.
DID YOU HEAR THAT?
105
00:04:00,774 --> 00:04:03,076
THEY THINK I CARE.
- YEAH.
106
00:04:03,311 --> 00:04:05,779
DO THEY KNOW THAT YOU USE
BUG SPRAY AS SUNSCREEN?
107
00:04:05,946 --> 00:04:07,848
OH--
108
00:04:08,015 --> 00:04:09,983
THAT IS THE WORST
SUNBURN I'VE EVER SEEN.
109
00:04:10,150 --> 00:04:11,952
WHAT DID YOU DO?
110
00:04:12,119 --> 00:04:13,821
IT'S JUST HIS FACE
A LITTLE BIT, YOU KNOW..
111
00:04:13,987 --> 00:04:15,523
AND BESIDES,
IT'S JUST A REMINDER
112
00:04:15,689 --> 00:04:17,024
OF THE GREAT DAY WE HAD,
RIGHT?
113
00:04:17,190 --> 00:04:18,091
- AH.
- OOH.
114
00:04:20,227 --> 00:04:21,228
LET'S SEE WHAT WE'VE GOT
GOING ON HERE, JOE.
115
00:04:24,932 --> 00:04:26,700
NOTICE? NO BUG BITES.
116
00:04:26,867 --> 00:04:29,337
DAD, WHEN THE KIDS AT SCHOOL
SEE MY SUNBURN,
117
00:04:29,503 --> 00:04:31,204
THEY'RE GONNA KNOW WE WENT
TO THE BEACH.
118
00:04:31,372 --> 00:04:33,073
YEAH, WELL,
UH, YOU KNOW, JOE,
119
00:04:33,240 --> 00:04:34,342
I'M GONNA TAKE CARE OF THIS.
120
00:04:34,442 --> 00:04:35,776
I GOT AN IDEA, OKAY?
121
00:04:35,943 --> 00:04:37,945
KEVIN, CAN YOU RUN A BATH?
122
00:04:38,111 --> 00:04:39,347
OOH,
A COOL BATH DOES SOUND GOOD.
123
00:04:39,447 --> 00:04:41,181
YEAH, RUN ONE FOR JOE TOO.
124
00:04:41,349 --> 00:04:42,249
OKAY, BUT MINE FIRST
'CAUSE I GOT SOME SAND
125
00:04:42,416 --> 00:04:42,683
IN MY NETHERS.
126
00:04:48,255 --> 00:04:50,558
MAKEUP?
I DON'T KNOW ABOUT THIS, DAD.
127
00:04:50,724 --> 00:04:52,526
WHAT ARE YOU
TALKING ABOUT, JOE?
128
00:04:52,693 --> 00:04:54,362
LOOK, YOU CAN'T EVEN SEE
THE SUNBURN ANYMORE.
129
00:04:54,528 --> 00:04:56,397
NICE WORK, BLAKE.
- ANY TIME, DAVID.
130
00:04:56,564 --> 00:04:58,699
ALL RIGHT. YEAH, THANKS
FOR TOUCHING ME UP TOO.
131
00:04:58,866 --> 00:05:01,835
DAD, WHAT IF THE WHOLE SCHOOL
FINDS OUT THE TRUTH?
132
00:05:02,002 --> 00:05:05,238
JOE, I'M NOT EMBARRASSED THAT
I WEAR A TINTED MOISTURIZER.
133
00:05:05,406 --> 00:05:07,074
I'M TALKING ABOUT ME, DAD.
134
00:05:07,240 --> 00:05:09,009
DO YOU KNOW WHAT HAPPENS
WHEN I LIE?
135
00:05:09,176 --> 00:05:11,979
I'LL BE FARTING UP AND DOWN
THE HALLWAYS.
136
00:05:12,145 --> 00:05:15,215
PRICE OF FREEDOM, JOE.
PRICE OF FREEDOM.
137
00:05:15,383 --> 00:05:18,018
OKAY.
NOW IT'S PERSONAL.
138
00:05:18,185 --> 00:05:20,688
I AM GOING DOOR TO DOOR
UNTIL I IDENTIFY
139
00:05:20,854 --> 00:05:23,391
WHO THIS BELONGS TO.
140
00:05:23,557 --> 00:05:25,559
DAD, PLEASE DO SOMETHING.
141
00:05:25,726 --> 00:05:27,861
SHE'S TURNING
INTO THE CRAZY POOP LADY.
142
00:05:28,028 --> 00:05:29,997
NOW I'VE NARROWED
THE CONTENTS DOWN
143
00:05:30,163 --> 00:05:32,833
TO EITHER THE FAZIO'S POODLE
OR THE GOLDSTEIN'S BICHON.
144
00:05:33,000 --> 00:05:34,602
HONEY, DO THESE SMELL
MORE LIKE
145
00:05:34,768 --> 00:05:36,904
MEATBALLS OR MATZOH BALLS
TO YOU?
146
00:05:37,070 --> 00:05:40,808
THEY SMELL LIKE CRAZY BALLS.
147
00:05:40,974 --> 00:05:42,643
I REST MY CASE.
148
00:05:42,810 --> 00:05:44,478
YOU KNOW, WE'RE LIVING
IN A SOCIETY
149
00:05:44,645 --> 00:05:46,414
WHERE RULES ARE MEANT
TO BE FOLLOWED.
150
00:05:46,580 --> 00:05:49,016
DADDY SAYS RULES ARE MEANT
TO BE BROKEN.
151
00:05:49,182 --> 00:05:51,151
THAT'S ONLY THE STUPID ONES,
HONEY. COME ON.
152
00:05:51,318 --> 00:05:53,053
ALL RIGHT, JOE,
GO GET IN THE CAR.
153
00:05:53,220 --> 00:05:54,822
ALL RIGHT.
OH, DON'T PUT THE SEAT BELT ON.
154
00:05:54,988 --> 00:05:56,424
I DON'T WANT TO RUIN
YOUR MAKEUP.
155
00:05:56,557 --> 00:05:57,891
KIDDING.
IT'S A JOKE.
156
00:05:58,058 --> 00:05:58,959
COME ON.
157
00:05:59,126 --> 00:06:00,193
OKAY, HONEY.
158
00:06:00,428 --> 00:06:02,095
JUST TO UNDERSTAND YOU,
159
00:06:02,262 --> 00:06:04,498
YOUR SOLUTION
TO JOE'S STRESS PROBLEM
160
00:06:04,665 --> 00:06:06,500
IS TO DITCH SCHOOL,
161
00:06:06,667 --> 00:06:08,669
GO TO THE BEACH,
AND LIE TO COVER IT UP.
162
00:06:08,836 --> 00:06:11,972
YOU UNDERSTAND ME COMPLETELY.
163
00:06:12,139 --> 00:06:14,107
IT'S WHY WE MAKE SUCH
A PERFECT TEAM.
164
00:06:14,274 --> 00:06:16,677
YOU DON'T THINK THAT'S GONNA
SCREW THINGS UP EVEN MORE?
165
00:06:16,844 --> 00:06:18,446
HONEY, IF I TOOK THE TIME
166
00:06:18,546 --> 00:06:20,180
TO THINK ABOUT
WHY I DO THINGS,
167
00:06:20,347 --> 00:06:22,483
I WOULDN'T HAVE TIME
TO DO ANYTHING.
168
00:06:22,650 --> 00:06:23,917
I'M GONNA GRAB
A CUP OF COFFEE.
169
00:06:24,084 --> 00:06:25,553
ANYBODY?
170
00:06:32,860 --> 00:06:34,862
UM, DUDE,
171
00:06:35,028 --> 00:06:37,097
I DON'T WANT TO FREAK YOU OUT,
172
00:06:37,264 --> 00:06:42,670
BUT I THINK YOUR FACE IS,
LIKE, MELTING.
173
00:06:42,836 --> 00:06:44,505
all: EWW!
174
00:06:44,672 --> 00:06:45,873
ALL RIGHT,
THAT'S ENOUGH, CLASS.
175
00:06:46,039 --> 00:06:48,008
I AM CONCERNED ABOUT JOE.
176
00:06:48,175 --> 00:06:49,877
HE HAS NEVER MISSED
A DAY OF SCHOOL.
177
00:06:50,043 --> 00:06:51,479
ARE YOU OKAY, JOE?
178
00:06:51,579 --> 00:06:52,513
YEAH.
179
00:06:52,680 --> 00:06:53,647
I'M FINE.
180
00:06:57,985 --> 00:07:01,154
DOES ANYONE ELSE SMELL
SAUSAGE LINKS?
181
00:07:01,321 --> 00:07:02,823
NO, WAIT.
182
00:07:02,990 --> 00:07:04,658
PATTIES.
183
00:07:04,825 --> 00:07:07,227
JOE, UNFORTUNATELY,
I THINK
184
00:07:07,394 --> 00:07:11,064
I KNOW WHAT'S GOING ON HERE.
185
00:07:11,231 --> 00:07:13,501
WELL, YOU'LL BE HAPPY
TO KNOW
186
00:07:13,601 --> 00:07:15,669
THAT MY TEACHER THINKS
I HAVE A HORRIBLE SKIN DISEASE.
187
00:07:15,836 --> 00:07:16,704
AW, JOE.
THAT'S AWFUL.
188
00:07:16,870 --> 00:07:18,572
BUT?
189
00:07:18,739 --> 00:07:20,107
NOBODY SUSPECTS ME
OF PLAYING HOOKY.
190
00:07:20,273 --> 00:07:21,274
- SO?
- THANK YOU?
191
00:07:21,509 --> 00:07:23,243
YOU'RE WELCOME.
192
00:07:23,410 --> 00:07:25,012
AH, IT'S NO WONDER
YOU'RE THE DADS WHO CARE
193
00:07:25,178 --> 00:07:26,046
CO-CHAIR CO-CARING DAD
OF THE YEAR.
194
00:07:26,213 --> 00:07:27,515
UH-HUH.
195
00:07:27,648 --> 00:07:28,716
- DAD...
- HUH?
196
00:07:28,882 --> 00:07:30,584
I CAN'T KEEP THIS UP.
197
00:07:30,751 --> 00:07:31,552
THIS IS MORE PRESSURE
THAN THE STREAK.
198
00:07:31,719 --> 00:07:33,186
OH.
199
00:07:33,353 --> 00:07:35,188
JOE, TAKE IT EASY. LISTEN.
200
00:07:35,355 --> 00:07:37,057
I'M--I'M GONNA GO TO SCHOOL
WITH YOU TOMORROW,
201
00:07:37,224 --> 00:07:38,125
AND I'LL CLEAR
THE WHOLE THING UP, OKAY?
202
00:07:38,291 --> 00:07:38,992
THANKS, DAD.
203
00:07:41,895 --> 00:07:42,930
OKAY.
204
00:07:43,096 --> 00:07:44,732
I JUST ATE A BIG MEAL,
205
00:07:44,898 --> 00:07:46,700
AND I'M NOT WAITING
TO GO SWIMMING.
206
00:07:46,867 --> 00:07:50,370
LET'S SEE WHAT HAPPENS.
207
00:07:52,339 --> 00:07:53,440
5 BUCKS SAYS SHE SINKS
LIKE A STONE.
208
00:07:57,878 --> 00:07:59,747
I HOPE YOU DON'T MIND,
MR. HOBBS,
209
00:07:59,913 --> 00:08:01,715
BUT I MENTIONED JOE'S CONDITION
TO HIS CLASSMATES,
210
00:08:01,882 --> 00:08:04,017
AND THEY REALLY WANTED
TO DO SOMETHING.
211
00:08:04,184 --> 00:08:05,619
OH, NO.
212
00:08:05,786 --> 00:08:07,688
UH, ALL RIGHT.
213
00:08:07,855 --> 00:08:09,156
MRS. LEE, THERE'S SOMETHING
THAT YOU SHOULD KNOW.
214
00:08:09,322 --> 00:08:11,058
THE--
215
00:08:16,964 --> 00:08:17,931
YOUR SKIN CAN'T WIN.
216
00:08:18,098 --> 00:08:19,667
YOU'RE WAVING?
217
00:08:19,833 --> 00:08:21,602
OH, IT'S JUST A REFLEX, JOE.
218
00:08:21,769 --> 00:08:23,236
MR. HOBBS,
219
00:08:23,403 --> 00:08:25,038
PRINCIPAL TEMPLEMAN.
- HEY.
220
00:08:25,205 --> 00:08:26,907
WE'RE ALL PULLING
FOR YOUR BOY.
221
00:08:27,074 --> 00:08:28,408
WELL, THANK YOU.
THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
222
00:08:28,576 --> 00:08:30,578
JUST TELL THEM.
223
00:08:30,744 --> 00:08:32,479
I CAN'T.
IF WE TELL THEM THE TRUTH NOW,
224
00:08:32,646 --> 00:08:34,582
THEY'RE ALL GONNA FEEL SILLY
FOR CARING.
225
00:08:34,715 --> 00:08:35,749
JOE! JOE!
226
00:08:35,916 --> 00:08:36,950
JOE! JOE! JOE! JOE!
227
00:08:37,117 --> 00:08:38,285
I'M SORRY! I LIED!
228
00:08:38,451 --> 00:08:39,720
I DON'T HAVE A SKIN DISEASE.
229
00:08:42,255 --> 00:08:43,223
IT'S A MIRACLE!
230
00:08:43,390 --> 00:08:44,825
HE'S CURED!
231
00:08:48,095 --> 00:08:48,962
OH, YEAH, YES!
232
00:08:53,366 --> 00:08:55,636
FILING A FALSE ABSENCE NOTE,
233
00:08:55,803 --> 00:08:58,071
IMPERSONATING A FALSE DISEASE,
234
00:08:58,238 --> 00:09:02,242
ACCEPTING PUBLIC SYMPATHY
FOR SAID FALSE DISEASE,
235
00:09:02,409 --> 00:09:06,413
AND COMMITTING HOOKY.
236
00:09:06,614 --> 00:09:07,781
PRINCIPAL TEMPLEMAN...
237
00:09:07,948 --> 00:09:09,449
HERE'S THE THING.
238
00:09:09,617 --> 00:09:10,517
WE BOTH KNOW
THAT MY SON JOE
239
00:09:10,684 --> 00:09:12,352
IS A GOOD KID.
240
00:09:12,519 --> 00:09:13,687
HE REALLY IS.
HE'S NOT TO BLAME HERE.
241
00:09:13,854 --> 00:09:15,923
IF THERE'S ANYBODY TO BLAME...
242
00:09:16,089 --> 00:09:18,391
IT'S THE SCHOOL.
243
00:09:18,626 --> 00:09:20,193
REALLY?
244
00:09:20,360 --> 00:09:22,162
AND AS THE LEADER
OF THAT SCHOOL,
245
00:09:22,329 --> 00:09:26,700
A LOT OF THAT BLAME LIES
WITH YOU, MY FRIEND.
246
00:09:26,867 --> 00:09:28,535
I MEAN, LOOK AT THE PRESSURE
YOU PUT THESE KIDS ON.
247
00:09:28,702 --> 00:09:30,437
YOU KNOW, MY SON DEVELOPED
A TWITCH.
248
00:09:30,638 --> 00:09:32,272
THERE IT IS. LOOK AT THAT.
IT'S UNSIGHTLY.
249
00:09:32,439 --> 00:09:34,507
IS IT ANY WONDER HE NEEDED
A DAY OFF?
250
00:09:34,675 --> 00:09:36,176
AND I'LL TELL YOU
SOMETHING ELSE.
251
00:09:36,343 --> 00:09:37,477
HE'S NOT ALONE
IN ALL OF THIS.
252
00:09:37,645 --> 00:09:38,712
WHEN WE WENT TO THE BEACH,
253
00:09:38,879 --> 00:09:40,480
YOU KNOW WHAT WE SAW?
254
00:09:40,648 --> 00:09:41,782
WE SAW LACEY FISHER
AND HER MOTHER
255
00:09:41,949 --> 00:09:45,518
HANGING OUT ON A BOAT.
256
00:09:45,686 --> 00:09:47,655
NOW,
AS AMERICA'S NUMBER ONE DAD,
257
00:09:47,821 --> 00:09:49,657
I'D LIKE TO THINK
THAT YOU'D LIKE TO ACT
258
00:09:49,823 --> 00:09:52,059
AS AMERICA'S NUMBER ONE
PRINCIPAL AND APOLOGIZE.
259
00:09:52,225 --> 00:09:55,362
WOW.
260
00:09:55,528 --> 00:09:58,298
JOE, WOULD YOU STEP OUTSIDE,
SO I CAN TALK TO YOUR FATHER?
261
00:09:58,465 --> 00:10:01,268
OOH, THIS ISN'T
GONNA END WELL.
262
00:10:01,434 --> 00:10:03,336
I'LL BE OUT IN A SECOND.
263
00:10:03,503 --> 00:10:04,872
HE JUST WANTS TO APOLOGIZE
TO ME IN PRIVATE.
264
00:10:05,038 --> 00:10:06,173
I GET IT.
265
00:10:06,339 --> 00:10:08,341
DID I SAY "WOW" ALREADY?
266
00:10:08,508 --> 00:10:12,445
'CAUSE IF I DID,
I SHOULD HAVE ADDED THIS TO IT.
267
00:10:14,682 --> 00:10:16,349
MR. HOBBS, YOU'VE INSPIRED ME.
268
00:10:16,516 --> 00:10:19,019
I'VE JUST DECIDED
TO INSTITUTE
269
00:10:19,186 --> 00:10:21,454
A PARENT/STUDENT
DETENTION SESSION
270
00:10:21,621 --> 00:10:23,490
ON SATURDAYS.
- OH.
271
00:10:23,657 --> 00:10:24,958
ONE THAT WILL HOLD PARENTS
EQUALLY ACCOUNTABLE
272
00:10:25,125 --> 00:10:26,526
FOR THEIR CHILDREN'S BEHAVIOR.
273
00:10:26,694 --> 00:10:29,129
OOH. YEAH.
274
00:10:29,296 --> 00:10:32,299
YOU KNOW, THE WIFE LOVES
HER SATURDAYS.
275
00:10:32,465 --> 00:10:33,867
BUT IF YOU THINK
IT'S THE RIGHT THING TO DO,
276
00:10:34,034 --> 00:10:35,669
SHE'LL BE HERE.
277
00:10:35,836 --> 00:10:38,071
AND WE'RE BACK TO "WOW."
278
00:10:43,276 --> 00:10:44,912
COME ON, GUYS.
279
00:10:45,078 --> 00:10:47,214
YOU'RE GONNA BE LATE
TO DETENTION.
280
00:10:47,380 --> 00:10:50,083
I DON'T WANT TO GO
TO STUPID DETENTION.
281
00:10:50,250 --> 00:10:51,785
WELL, SWEETIE,
YOUR DAD'S GOING WITH YOU.
282
00:10:51,952 --> 00:10:54,021
YOU SHOULD FOLLOW HIS EXAMPLE.
283
00:10:54,187 --> 00:10:56,957
I DON'T WANT TO GO
TO STUPID DETENTION.
284
00:10:57,124 --> 00:10:58,992
SO WERE YOU AND MARCUS
AT LEAST ABLE TO RESCHEDULE
285
00:10:59,159 --> 00:11:00,861
THE "DADS WHO CARE" INTERVIEW?
286
00:11:01,028 --> 00:11:02,529
NO. IT'S LIVE RADIO,
287
00:11:02,730 --> 00:11:04,597
SO WE'RE LOCKED IN.
- OH.
288
00:11:04,765 --> 00:11:06,599
GONNA HAVE TO DO THE INTERVIEW
FROM STUPID DETENTION.
289
00:11:06,767 --> 00:11:08,535
I'M GOING BACK TO BED.
290
00:11:08,736 --> 00:11:13,173
I STAYED UP LATE
WATCHING {\an8}TITANIC.
291
00:11:13,340 --> 00:11:15,542
THE SHIP SINKS.
292
00:11:22,115 --> 00:11:23,884
IT'S NOT A TOTAL LOSS.
293
00:11:24,051 --> 00:11:26,854
THE FISHERS COULDN'T OUTRUN
THE LAW EITHER.
294
00:11:27,020 --> 00:11:29,489
HEY, LACEY.
I SEE WE BOTH GOT DETENTION.
295
00:11:29,656 --> 00:11:31,591
APPARENTLY, THE PRINCIPAL
GOT AN ANONYMOUS TIP
296
00:11:31,759 --> 00:11:34,061
THAT WE WERE ON A BOAT
THE OTHER DAY.
297
00:11:34,227 --> 00:11:35,829
YEAH, WELL,
IT'S LIKE I TELL
298
00:11:35,996 --> 00:11:37,831
MY YOUNG SON, JOE,
ALL THE TIME.
299
00:11:37,998 --> 00:11:39,132
IF YOU GONNA DO THE CRIME,
YOU GOTTA DO THE TIME.
300
00:11:39,299 --> 00:11:40,433
WHAT CRIME?
301
00:11:40,600 --> 00:11:42,535
I LOST MY MOTHER RECENTLY.
302
00:11:42,770 --> 00:11:46,874
WE WERE ON THAT BOAT SCATTERING
HER ASHES INTO THE SEA.
303
00:11:49,342 --> 00:11:52,179
THEY WERE STILL ON A BOAT.
304
00:11:52,345 --> 00:11:53,914
GOOD MORNING.
LOOKS LIKE WE'RE ALL--
305
00:11:54,081 --> 00:11:55,783
PRINCIPAL TEMPLEMAN,
IF I MAY.
306
00:11:55,883 --> 00:11:57,017
I NOTICED THAT
THERE WASN'T ANY COFFEE
307
00:11:57,184 --> 00:11:58,251
TO GO WITH THOSE DOUGHNUTS
308
00:11:58,418 --> 00:12:00,287
SO I'D LIKE TO TREAT.
309
00:12:00,453 --> 00:12:02,322
I KNOW MRS. FISHER COULD USE
A LITTLE PICK-ME-UP.
310
00:12:02,322 --> 00:12:04,324
SO IF YOU'LL JUST LET ME
CALL MY ASSISTANT--
311
00:12:04,491 --> 00:12:06,860
THERE WILL BE NO CELL PHONES, EVERYONE.
312
00:12:07,027 --> 00:12:09,196
ADD THEIRS TO THE BOX.
313
00:12:09,362 --> 00:12:10,697
THANK YOU.
314
00:12:10,864 --> 00:12:13,066
THANK YOU.
315
00:12:13,233 --> 00:12:16,970
THEY'LL BE IN MY OFFICE
AT THE END OF THE DAY.
316
00:12:17,137 --> 00:12:19,539
NICELY PLAYED. VERY NICE.
317
00:12:19,706 --> 00:12:20,908
VERY NICE. I GET IT.
318
00:12:21,074 --> 00:12:22,810
OKAY, LISTEN. HERE'S THE THING.
319
00:12:22,910 --> 00:12:24,544
WHEN YOU'RE DONE
WITH YOUR LITTLE SHOW,
320
00:12:24,711 --> 00:12:25,645
I HAVE A VERY IMPORTANT
LIVE INTERVIEW
321
00:12:25,813 --> 00:12:27,514
I HAVE TO DO,
322
00:12:27,680 --> 00:12:29,382
SO IF YOU WOULD SLIP ME BACK
THAT PHONE
323
00:12:29,549 --> 00:12:31,484
WITHOUT ANYBODY SEEING,
THAT'D BE GREAT.
324
00:12:31,651 --> 00:12:32,619
MR. HOBBS SEEMS TO THINK
THIS IS ALL FUN AND GAMES.
325
00:12:32,820 --> 00:12:33,887
WELL, IT'S NOT.
326
00:12:34,054 --> 00:12:34,955
IS THAT CLEAR?
327
00:12:35,122 --> 00:12:37,390
YES, SIR.
328
00:12:37,557 --> 00:12:39,592
- STOP THAT.
- ABSOLUTELY.
329
00:12:39,827 --> 00:12:41,328
I'M NOT KIDDING.
DO YOU AND YOUR SON
330
00:12:41,494 --> 00:12:42,395
WANT TO BE HERE
AGAIN NEXT WEEK?
331
00:12:42,562 --> 00:12:43,596
OH, NO, SIR.
332
00:12:43,831 --> 00:12:44,898
THAT'S ANOTHER WEEK.
333
00:12:45,065 --> 00:12:46,834
OH, I'M IN BIG TROUBLE.
334
00:12:46,934 --> 00:12:48,936
- AND ANOTHER.
- DAD, YOU'RE KILLING ME.
335
00:12:49,102 --> 00:12:50,003
WAIT A MINUTE, HE'S SERIOUS?
336
00:12:50,170 --> 00:12:51,738
AND ANOTHER!
337
00:12:51,905 --> 00:12:53,907
THIS STUPID DETENTION!
338
00:12:58,545 --> 00:13:00,313
THIS STAKEOUT'S
THE ONLY WAY
339
00:13:00,480 --> 00:13:02,850
WE'RE GONNA SNIFF OUT
THE POOP-A-TRAITOR.
340
00:13:03,016 --> 00:13:05,218
WHAT IF THEY'RE ALREADY GONE
AND ON THE RUNS?
341
00:13:07,855 --> 00:13:09,857
OKAY, THE FACT THAT WE'RE
OUT HERE IS BAD ENOUGH,
342
00:13:09,990 --> 00:13:11,859
BUT DO WE REALLY HAVE
TO KEEP MAKING POOP PUNS?
343
00:13:11,959 --> 00:13:13,426
YES, WE DO-DO.
344
00:13:15,595 --> 00:13:17,364
ALL RIGHT, PEOPLE.
345
00:13:17,530 --> 00:13:19,199
I HAVE TO MAKE
A FEW BUSINESS CALLS.
346
00:13:19,366 --> 00:13:21,401
BUT I'LL BE RIGHT OUT
IN THE HALLWAY.
347
00:13:21,568 --> 00:13:23,270
SO IF ANY OF YOU WERE
THINKING ABOUT JUMPING SHIP,
348
00:13:23,436 --> 00:13:25,138
MRS. FISHER...
349
00:13:26,706 --> 00:13:27,740
DON'T.
350
00:13:41,889 --> 00:13:43,590
DAD?
351
00:13:43,756 --> 00:13:45,392
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
352
00:13:45,558 --> 00:13:47,895
IT'S BETTER
YOU DON'T KNOW, JOE.
353
00:13:48,061 --> 00:13:50,130
BUT I DO LIKE PEOPLE KNOWING
WHERE I AM AT ALL TIMES
354
00:13:50,297 --> 00:13:53,533
SO THEY DON'T WORRY ABOUT ME.
355
00:13:53,700 --> 00:13:55,335
I'M GONNA GO GET MY PHONE,
356
00:13:55,502 --> 00:13:57,370
I'M GONNA DO THE INTERVIEW,
OKAY?
357
00:13:57,537 --> 00:13:59,606
FORGET ABOUT ME.
GO BACK WITH THE OTHER STUDENTS.
358
00:13:59,772 --> 00:14:01,641
OKAY.
359
00:14:01,808 --> 00:14:04,577
I DON'T WANT YOU HERE.
GO ON, NOW GET. GO.
360
00:14:04,744 --> 00:14:07,047
- FINE.
- THIS AIN'T NO LIFE FOR YOU.
361
00:14:07,214 --> 00:14:09,049
NO ARGUMENT HERE.
I'LL SEE YOU LATER.
362
00:14:09,216 --> 00:14:11,751
ARE YOU REALLY NOT GONNA
HELP ME? I'M YOUR DAD.
363
00:14:11,919 --> 00:14:14,221
FINE. I CAN'T GET IN
ANY MORE TROUBLE, SO...
364
00:14:14,387 --> 00:14:15,989
BEFORE YOU MAKE THAT CALL,
365
00:14:16,156 --> 00:14:17,724
WE'RE ABOUT TO CRAWL
INTO A VENT.
366
00:14:17,925 --> 00:14:19,559
SO LET'S SEE
HOW IT PLAYS OUT.
367
00:14:23,696 --> 00:14:24,932
FANTASIA,
368
00:14:25,065 --> 00:14:26,799
WOULD YOU HURRY UP, FANTASIA?
369
00:14:26,967 --> 00:14:29,002
THE CRAZY POOP LADY IS
ON TO US.
370
00:14:29,169 --> 00:14:31,838
LOOK, SHE'S EVEN GOT FLYERS
OUT IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD.
371
00:14:32,005 --> 00:14:33,941
MM, MM, MM, MM.
372
00:14:34,107 --> 00:14:36,609
DON'T GIVE ME THAT SHY LOOK.
DO YOUR BUSINESS.
373
00:14:36,776 --> 00:14:38,946
I DO IT IN FRONT OF YOU.
- OKAY, YOU GUYS.
374
00:14:39,112 --> 00:14:41,281
LUNCH BREAK IS OVER.
LET'S GET BACK INTO POSITION.
375
00:14:41,448 --> 00:14:43,083
THEY'RE COMING.
COME ON.
376
00:14:43,250 --> 00:14:44,851
LET'S GO, GIRL. COME ON.
LET'S GO.
377
00:14:48,821 --> 00:14:50,857
THIS IS WORSE THAN
WHEN WE HAD TO WAIT FOR JOE
378
00:14:51,024 --> 00:14:53,060
AFTER HE SWALLOWED THE QUARTER
FROM HIS 50-STATE COLLECTION.
379
00:14:53,226 --> 00:14:55,562
YEAH, THE WEIRD THING WAS
THAT HE SWALLOWED A COLORADO,
380
00:14:55,728 --> 00:14:59,432
BUT POOPED OUT A HAWAII.
381
00:14:59,599 --> 00:15:03,803
ONLY MAGIC TRICK
HE EVER PULLED OFF.
382
00:15:03,971 --> 00:15:05,038
GREAT.
383
00:15:05,205 --> 00:15:07,074
NOW WE'RE STUCK HERE.
384
00:15:07,240 --> 00:15:09,509
HOW COME I COULDN'T FALL
IN LOVE WITH A MANLY DOG
385
00:15:09,676 --> 00:15:12,179
THAT I WASN'T AFRAID
TO BE SEEN WITH?
386
00:15:16,783 --> 00:15:17,850
HOW YOU DOING BACK THERE, DAD?
387
00:15:18,018 --> 00:15:19,987
YEAH, I'M GOOD.
388
00:15:20,120 --> 00:15:21,888
I'M NO STRANGER TO CLIMBING
THROUGH VENTS.
389
00:15:22,055 --> 00:15:23,356
SEASON TWO WE DID
AN EPISODE CALLED
390
00:15:23,523 --> 00:15:26,226
{\an8}SEE DAD VENT HIS FRUSTRATION.
391
00:15:26,393 --> 00:15:29,162
- OH, I LOVE THAT ONE.
- YEAH.
392
00:15:29,329 --> 00:15:31,531
AMERICA LOVES CLIMBING
THROUGH VENTS.
393
00:15:31,698 --> 00:15:33,466
DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA
WHERE YOU'RE GOING?
394
00:15:33,633 --> 00:15:35,468
OKAY.
395
00:15:35,635 --> 00:15:38,905
WE'RE RIGHT ABOVE
THE PRINCIPAL'S OFFICE.
396
00:15:39,072 --> 00:15:40,140
OKAY.
397
00:15:40,307 --> 00:15:41,341
LET'S PUSH THIS DOWN.
398
00:15:43,743 --> 00:15:44,644
ALMOST THERE.
399
00:15:44,811 --> 00:15:46,279
OOH!
400
00:15:50,450 --> 00:15:52,252
IT'S OKAY, DAD.
THE FLOOR BROKE MY FALL.
401
00:15:52,419 --> 00:15:55,855
OH, GOOD.
NOW GO GRAB THE PHONE.
402
00:15:56,023 --> 00:15:57,757
I GOT IT.
403
00:15:57,924 --> 00:15:59,759
DEAR, I PROMISE
I'LL BE HOME BY 4:00.
404
00:15:59,926 --> 00:16:03,296
YES, I'M HAVING THE YOGURT
THAT YOU PACKED ME.
405
00:16:03,463 --> 00:16:05,032
IT'S TEMPLEMAN!
406
00:16:05,132 --> 00:16:07,500
- OH!
- SAVE YOURSELF.
407
00:16:07,667 --> 00:16:10,037
AND DO THE INTERVIEW, DAD.
DO IT FOR AMERICA.
408
00:16:10,170 --> 00:16:12,205
NO, MARGARET.
409
00:16:12,372 --> 00:16:15,142
I DID NOT STOP FOR DOUGHNUTS,
AND I RESENT THE ACCUSATION.
410
00:16:15,308 --> 00:16:16,443
WELL, APOLOGY ACCEPTED.
411
00:16:16,609 --> 00:16:20,047
YES, I LOVE YOU TOO.
412
00:16:20,180 --> 00:16:21,681
AH, SATURDAYS.
413
00:16:21,848 --> 00:16:25,252
IT'S BEAR CLAW TIME.
414
00:16:25,418 --> 00:16:27,320
MARGARET SAID
I SHOULDN'T EAT YOU.
415
00:16:37,330 --> 00:16:40,667
HELLO?
THIS IS HE.
416
00:16:40,833 --> 00:16:43,370
WELL, YEAH.
I JUST WANT TO TELL YOU
417
00:16:43,536 --> 00:16:46,939
THAT I'M HONORED
TO HAVE BEEN CHOSEN.
418
00:16:47,107 --> 00:16:48,508
AM I WHISPERING?
419
00:16:48,675 --> 00:16:50,943
I DON'T THINK SO.
420
00:16:51,111 --> 00:16:53,913
MARCUS, ARE YOU THERE?
MAYBE THEY CAN HEAR YOU BETTER.
421
00:16:54,081 --> 00:16:54,981
YES, I'M HERE.
422
00:16:55,148 --> 00:16:56,316
WHAT?
423
00:16:56,483 --> 00:17:01,388
NO, I'M NOT WHISPERING EITHER.
424
00:17:01,554 --> 00:17:04,191
WHAT WE'RE TRYING TO SAY IS
WE ARE NOT WHISPERING.
425
00:17:04,357 --> 00:17:06,793
AND WE BOTH CARE.
426
00:17:06,959 --> 00:17:09,196
YES, AND WE BOTH WANT
TO BE GOOD ROLE MODELS
427
00:17:09,362 --> 00:17:11,098
AND SET A GOOD EXAMPLE
FOR OUR CHILDREN.
428
00:17:11,264 --> 00:17:12,332
EXACTLY.
429
00:17:12,499 --> 00:17:14,201
BEING STAND-UP CITIZENS
430
00:17:14,367 --> 00:17:15,635
AND WALKING PROUDLY
IN THE COMMUNITY.
431
00:17:25,445 --> 00:17:27,480
PRINCIPAL TEMPLEMAN.
432
00:17:27,647 --> 00:17:30,217
JOE, HOW LONG
HAVE YOU BEEN THERE?
433
00:17:30,383 --> 00:17:34,587
SINCE THE BEAR CLAW FIGHT.
434
00:17:34,754 --> 00:17:37,790
YOU CARE TO EXPLAIN YOURSELF,
YOUNG MAN?
435
00:17:37,957 --> 00:17:40,327
I WANTED TO GET
MY DAD'S PHONE BACK
436
00:17:40,493 --> 00:17:42,529
SO HE COULD DO HIS INTERVIEW.
437
00:17:42,695 --> 00:17:44,797
YOU SEE, HE'S A ROLE MODEL
FOR SO MANY PEOPLE.
438
00:17:44,964 --> 00:17:46,566
I JUST DIDN'T WANT HIM
TO LET THEM DOWN.
439
00:17:46,733 --> 00:17:49,236
SO I CRAWLED THROUGH THE VENT
440
00:17:49,402 --> 00:17:51,371
AND I WAS GONNA GIVE HIM
HIS PHONE BACK.
441
00:17:51,538 --> 00:17:53,440
THE WHOLE THING WAS MY IDEA.
442
00:17:53,606 --> 00:17:54,874
WELL, JOE, I THOUGHT
YOU WERE A ROLE MODEL
443
00:17:55,041 --> 00:17:56,276
FOR A LOT OF PEOPLE AS WELL.
444
00:17:56,443 --> 00:17:58,811
I GUESS I WAS WRONG.
445
00:17:58,978 --> 00:18:00,280
YOU WERE WRONG.
446
00:18:00,447 --> 00:18:02,682
ABOUT BEING WRONG.
447
00:18:02,849 --> 00:18:04,584
JOE IS A ROLE MODEL.
448
00:18:04,751 --> 00:18:06,686
HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN THERE?
449
00:18:06,853 --> 00:18:09,322
SINCE THE BEAR CLAW FIGHT.
450
00:18:09,489 --> 00:18:12,225
WE BOTH SAW IT.
451
00:18:12,392 --> 00:18:14,327
PRINCIPAL TEMPLEMAN,
452
00:18:14,494 --> 00:18:18,064
JOE IS NOT THE GUILTY ONE.
AND NEITHER IS THE SCHOOL.
453
00:18:18,231 --> 00:18:21,401
AND NEITHER ARE YOU.
I AM.
454
00:18:21,568 --> 00:18:23,636
AND IF JOE WAS FEELING
ANY PRESSURE AT ALL,
455
00:18:23,803 --> 00:18:27,640
HE'S FEELING WAY MORE NOW
BECAUSE OF ME.
456
00:18:27,807 --> 00:18:32,044
AND HERE HE IS STILL TRYING
TO TAKE THE FALL FOR ME.
457
00:18:32,212 --> 00:18:33,980
WELL, I'M NOT GONNA LET
THAT HAPPEN THIS TIME.
458
00:18:34,181 --> 00:18:35,615
I'M GONNA TAKE THE FALL FOR HIM.
459
00:18:40,820 --> 00:18:44,891
A LITTLE ON THE NOSE, BUT OKAY.
460
00:18:45,057 --> 00:18:46,759
YES,
THAT'S THE TYPE OF FATHER
461
00:18:46,926 --> 00:18:48,228
WE USED TO DEPICT ON THE SHOW.
462
00:18:48,395 --> 00:18:51,030
SOMEONE--UGH.
463
00:18:51,198 --> 00:18:54,634
WHO WOULDN'T HIDE
FROM RESPONSIBILITY.
464
00:18:54,801 --> 00:18:56,769
TAZEY, COME BACK HERE.
465
00:18:56,936 --> 00:18:57,770
YOU KNOW WE'RE SUPPOSED
TO BE HIDING.
466
00:18:57,937 --> 00:18:58,771
TAZEY.
467
00:19:01,374 --> 00:19:03,943
SOMEBODY'S DOG, LOOK LIKE
A SKUNK DOG RAN THROUGH THERE.
468
00:19:04,110 --> 00:19:05,378
I'VE BEEN TRYING TO GET
A PICTURE OF IT.
469
00:19:05,545 --> 00:19:07,780
MARCUS?
470
00:19:07,947 --> 00:19:10,317
LOOK, I GOTTA GO.
IT'S BEEN HONOR. BYE.
471
00:19:10,483 --> 00:19:13,085
WHEN DID YOU GET A DOG?
472
00:19:13,253 --> 00:19:15,588
OH, LOOK AT HER.
473
00:19:15,755 --> 00:19:18,225
IT'S BEEN TWO WEEKS.
474
00:19:18,325 --> 00:19:21,294
LOOK, MY CIGAR SHOP IS
RIGHT NEXT TO A DOG RESCUE.
475
00:19:21,461 --> 00:19:23,663
SO I WAS UP TO SIX CIGARS A DAY
476
00:19:23,830 --> 00:19:25,765
JUST SO I COULD SEE HER
IN THE WINDOW.
477
00:19:25,932 --> 00:19:29,068
FINALLY, I HAD TO TAKE
MY LITTLE TAZEY HOME.
478
00:19:29,236 --> 00:19:31,371
THEN WHY DIDN'T YOU PICK UP
AFTER TAZEY?
479
00:19:31,538 --> 00:19:33,273
I JUST COULDN'T DO IT.
480
00:19:33,440 --> 00:19:35,775
I FELT LIKE EVERY TIME
I THREW HER POOP AWAY,
481
00:19:35,942 --> 00:19:41,113
I WAS THROWING A PIECE
OF HER AWAY.
482
00:19:41,281 --> 00:19:43,383
LOOK AT THIS FACE.
DO YOU BLAME ME?
483
00:19:43,550 --> 00:19:46,319
WHO'S A LITTLE
SCHMOOTZIE WOOTZIE BEAR?
484
00:19:46,486 --> 00:19:48,388
WHO'S GOT
THE CUTEST LITTLE FACE?
485
00:19:48,555 --> 00:19:49,722
WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL US
486
00:19:49,889 --> 00:19:51,324
YOU GOT A DOGGY-WOGGY?
487
00:19:51,491 --> 00:19:53,025
THAT'S WHY.
488
00:19:53,260 --> 00:19:55,027
DID HE SCARE YOU?
IT'S OKAY.
489
00:19:55,262 --> 00:19:56,296
LET'S GO HOME AND CUDDLE
AND WATCH BASKETBALL.
490
00:20:02,702 --> 00:20:04,504
"DEAR KEVIN,
491
00:20:04,671 --> 00:20:06,373
"WE ACCEPT THE FACT THAT
YOU GET A LITTLE UPSET
492
00:20:06,539 --> 00:20:08,408
"WHEN WE LEAVE
FOR THE BEACH WITHOUT YOU.
493
00:20:08,575 --> 00:20:10,677
BUT YOU HAVE TO ACCEPT
THIS FAMILY FOR WHO WE ARE."
494
00:20:12,479 --> 00:20:14,747
"A CRAZY POOP LADY."
495
00:20:14,914 --> 00:20:17,917
"THE EMBARRASSED DAUGHTER
OF A CRAZY POOP LADY."
496
00:20:18,084 --> 00:20:20,720
"A RULE BREAKER."
497
00:20:20,887 --> 00:20:23,590
"AN ATTENDANCE JUNKIE."
498
00:20:23,756 --> 00:20:25,892
"A LITTLE DOGGY LOVER."
499
00:20:26,058 --> 00:20:28,728
"AND AMERICA'S
NUMBER ONE DAD.
500
00:20:28,895 --> 00:20:30,597
"BUT ONE THING
WE KNOW FOR SURE--
501
00:20:30,763 --> 00:20:32,465
"WE'RE BETTER
WHEN WE'RE ALL TOGETHER.
502
00:20:32,632 --> 00:20:34,267
"WHICH INCLUDES YOU, KEVIN.
503
00:20:34,434 --> 00:20:36,035
"SO NO, WE DIDN'T FORGET
ABOUT YOU.
504
00:20:36,202 --> 00:20:37,069
NOW HURRY UP,
WE'RE IN THE CAR."
505
00:20:37,236 --> 00:20:38,871
YES!
506
00:20:40,440 --> 00:20:40,907
♪ DON'T YOU
35427
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