All language subtitles for Gangster 2: Gone With The Bullets (2014) [ tt2168000 ] Action, Crime, Drama - Jiang When

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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:01:27,458 --> 00:01:29,666 To be or not to be 2 00:01:30,875 --> 00:01:33,083 这么着还是那么着 3 00:01:33,833 --> 00:01:36,416 这是莎士比亚的问题呀 4 00:01:38,500 --> 00:01:41,666 等我们离开北京到了上海 5 00:01:41,916 --> 00:01:43,833 To be or not to be 6 00:01:44,625 --> 00:01:47,500 又变成了大家伙儿的问题了 7 00:01:48,291 --> 00:01:50,375 冒险家的乐园嘛 8 00:01:52,500 --> 00:01:54,708 您像我这么个好人 9 00:01:54,791 --> 00:01:58,000 可以这么着也可以那么着 10 00:01:58,375 --> 00:02:00,541 这 “To be or not to be” 11 00:02:01,083 --> 00:02:02,541 什么时候儿? 12 00:02:02,875 --> 00:02:06,416 它又变成了我自个儿的问题了呢? 13 00:02:08,500 --> 00:02:09,708 咱们这故事啊 14 00:02:09,750 --> 00:02:13,916 得从武大帅的公子武七讲起 15 00:02:14,583 --> 00:02:17,291 他遇见了个顶大的麻烦 16 00:02:17,375 --> 00:02:18,750 找我帮忙 17 00:02:19,166 --> 00:02:21,458 哎我还真给他帮成了 18 00:02:22,583 --> 00:02:24,166 那么我是谁呀? 19 00:02:24,875 --> 00:02:27,458 马走日便是在下 20 00:02:30,375 --> 00:02:31,458 我热爱上海 21 00:02:32,000 --> 00:02:33,291 上海让我成了我 22 00:02:33,916 --> 00:02:35,041 我爸成了我爸 23 00:02:35,416 --> 00:02:36,500 我家成了我家 24 00:02:36,833 --> 00:02:37,583 但是这一次 25 00:02:38,166 --> 00:02:39,375 我却让上海丢了脸 26 00:02:40,000 --> 00:02:40,708 十天前 27 00:02:41,125 --> 00:02:43,291 我心爱的葛施里妮小姐从意大利飞来 28 00:02:43,708 --> 00:02:45,250 她刚下飞机就跟我说 29 00:02:45,625 --> 00:02:48,666 她要吃全上海最有名的王婆刀鱼面 30 00:02:49,083 --> 00:02:49,750 我说:吃! 31 00:02:50,916 --> 00:02:52,625 我清空了街道包下餐厅 32 00:02:53,083 --> 00:02:55,458 我亲手把面端到她的面前 33 00:02:56,875 --> 00:02:57,958 她并没有吃 34 00:02:58,333 --> 00:02:58,833 她问我 35 00:02:59,708 --> 00:03:00,500 王婆呢? 36 00:03:01,250 --> 00:03:02,000 我说:走了 37 00:03:03,250 --> 00:03:04,708 她起身就走到街上 38 00:03:05,375 --> 00:03:05,958 她问我 39 00:03:06,958 --> 00:03:08,166 这街上的人呢? 40 00:03:08,625 --> 00:03:09,916 我说全轰走啦! 41 00:03:11,458 --> 00:03:12,541 她很生气 42 00:03:13,875 --> 00:03:16,750 她用手指着我的鼻子恶狠狠地说 43 00:03:17,750 --> 00:03:18,666 小哧喽! 44 00:03:22,416 --> 00:03:23,083 我 45 00:03:23,708 --> 00:03:24,666 武七 46 00:03:25,166 --> 00:03:28,750 我让一个意大利娘们儿骂我是小哧喽! 47 00:03:44,833 --> 00:03:45,416 第二天 48 00:03:46,750 --> 00:03:47,666 我冲到机场 49 00:03:48,125 --> 00:03:50,166 拦下葛施里妮小姐的私人飞机 50 00:03:51,041 --> 00:03:52,083 我拔出手枪 51 00:03:52,291 --> 00:03:53,333 面对她的保镖我说 52 00:03:53,375 --> 00:03:54,333 你给我滚开 53 00:03:54,708 --> 00:03:55,166 滚! 54 00:03:56,791 --> 00:03:57,625 冲上飞机 55 00:03:58,208 --> 00:03:58,750 我说: 56 00:03:59,375 --> 00:04:00,208 小姐 57 00:04:00,833 --> 00:04:02,541 面来了 58 00:04:03,125 --> 00:04:05,458 王婆也来了 59 00:04:07,000 --> 00:04:07,833 她没有理我 60 00:04:08,791 --> 00:04:10,250 她走到王婆面前 61 00:04:10,416 --> 00:04:11,875 捧起王婆的脸 62 00:04:17,083 --> 00:04:18,083 她端起面问我 63 00:04:20,416 --> 00:04:21,125 锅气呢? 64 00:04:22,250 --> 00:04:22,833 我说:什么? 65 00:04:24,166 --> 00:04:25,625 锅的气 66 00:04:27,166 --> 00:04:28,625 我根本不懂她说什么 67 00:04:28,708 --> 00:04:29,875 什么叫锅气? 68 00:04:31,583 --> 00:04:32,791 她转脸问王婆 69 00:04:34,250 --> 00:04:35,208 这么好的面 70 00:04:35,791 --> 00:04:37,041 是不是应该有锅气 71 00:04:37,583 --> 00:04:38,250 王婆点点头 72 00:04:39,125 --> 00:04:40,083 她接着对我说 73 00:04:41,000 --> 00:04:42,583 我的飞机前面是厨房 74 00:04:43,166 --> 00:04:44,125 这里是餐桌 75 00:04:44,708 --> 00:04:46,958 从厨房到餐桌正好五米 76 00:04:47,291 --> 00:04:50,041 面端上来在这五米里头 77 00:04:50,083 --> 00:04:51,708 才有锅气! 78 00:04:53,541 --> 00:04:54,291 武七少爷 79 00:04:55,291 --> 00:04:56,041 你是中国人 80 00:04:56,208 --> 00:04:57,166 还是大帅的儿子 81 00:04:57,541 --> 00:04:59,583 居然不知道什么叫锅气 82 00:05:01,541 --> 00:05:02,291 永别了 83 00:05:03,541 --> 00:05:04,833 忘掉罗马假日 84 00:05:05,333 --> 00:05:06,250 忘掉葛施里妮 85 00:05:07,125 --> 00:05:10,000 因为我已经把你忘记了 86 00:05:10,666 --> 00:05:11,333 你… 87 00:05:11,833 --> 00:05:14,208 是一个New Money! 88 00:05:17,125 --> 00:05:18,416 说完她就飞走了 89 00:05:19,125 --> 00:05:20,291 她飞去了东京 90 00:05:21,083 --> 00:05:22,208 她再也不会回来了 91 00:05:28,333 --> 00:05:30,791 王婆居然在冲我笑! 92 00:05:34,208 --> 00:05:35,000 事后 93 00:05:36,791 --> 00:05:38,916 我寻遍了文人雅士 94 00:05:39,208 --> 00:05:39,916 我问他们 95 00:05:40,291 --> 00:05:42,291 我怎么才能把我的面子 96 00:05:42,333 --> 00:05:44,375 和上海的面子全部找回来 97 00:05:44,791 --> 00:05:46,541 我怎么才能把Money 98 00:05:46,583 --> 00:05:48,416 从New变成Old 99 00:05:49,416 --> 00:05:50,875 所有人的答案出奇地一致 100 00:05:51,875 --> 00:05:52,833 就是来找你 101 00:05:53,958 --> 00:05:54,750 马走日! 102 00:06:00,041 --> 00:06:01,958 为什么先带姑娘去吃面? 103 00:06:02,625 --> 00:06:04,333 为什么不先带她来找我? 104 00:06:05,000 --> 00:06:06,166 从现在开始 105 00:06:06,291 --> 00:06:08,375 唯你马走日马首是瞻 106 00:06:08,958 --> 00:06:10,125 你得帮我这个忙 107 00:06:11,083 --> 00:06:12,041 怎么帮法儿? 108 00:06:35,666 --> 00:06:36,250 不成 109 00:06:37,166 --> 00:06:38,125 这我不答应 110 00:06:38,666 --> 00:06:39,958 王婆不该死 111 00:06:40,000 --> 00:06:40,583 你说! 112 00:06:40,625 --> 00:06:42,500 你你你…自己说 113 00:06:42,625 --> 00:06:45,083 多少钱你能说一个行! 114 00:06:45,416 --> 00:06:46,541 你亲姐 115 00:06:46,875 --> 00:06:48,041 武六的亲妈 116 00:06:49,291 --> 00:06:50,500 是我这辈子 117 00:06:50,875 --> 00:06:51,833 唯一的老师 118 00:06:52,416 --> 00:06:54,208 一日为师终生为父 119 00:06:54,458 --> 00:06:56,166 我把我这唯一的老师 120 00:06:57,000 --> 00:06:58,250 当成了我的亲妈 121 00:06:58,958 --> 00:07:00,833 我把自己当成她的亲儿子 122 00:07:01,375 --> 00:07:02,583 可是你不尊重我 123 00:07:02,833 --> 00:07:03,875 你求我办事 124 00:07:04,125 --> 00:07:05,708 你连个“您”字儿都不说 125 00:07:09,583 --> 00:07:10,625 你刚才说了 126 00:07:10,875 --> 00:07:12,333 十五个“你”字儿 127 00:07:12,958 --> 00:07:13,833 马先生 128 00:07:14,166 --> 00:07:15,375 实不相瞒那件事儿之后 129 00:07:15,500 --> 00:07:16,333 我是落下病根儿了 130 00:07:16,500 --> 00:07:17,666 我不太敢花钱了 131 00:07:17,750 --> 00:07:20,041 这些钱全砸在手里我得花呀! 132 00:07:20,083 --> 00:07:20,666 多少钱呐? 133 00:07:20,791 --> 00:07:21,833 够买半个上海 134 00:07:22,125 --> 00:07:22,750 马先生 135 00:07:22,958 --> 00:07:25,458 这些钱您得帮我花出去 136 00:07:25,583 --> 00:07:26,333 但就一条儿 137 00:07:26,416 --> 00:07:27,250 得花得体面 138 00:07:27,375 --> 00:07:29,000 让我看着像一个O! d Money 139 00:07:29,125 --> 00:07:30,791 让葛施里妮小姐佩服我 140 00:07:30,833 --> 00:07:31,750 让她回到上海 141 00:07:31,791 --> 00:07:33,125 亲自跟我道歉 142 00:07:33,708 --> 00:07:34,500 到那个时候 143 00:07:34,750 --> 00:07:36,333 您想要多少钱 144 00:07:36,541 --> 00:07:37,958 您自个儿拿 145 00:07:40,958 --> 00:07:42,125 武七少爷啊 146 00:07:42,291 --> 00:07:43,125 武七少爷 147 00:07:44,166 --> 00:07:45,958 我什么时候得罪过你 148 00:07:46,291 --> 00:07:48,875 你非得割我心里这疮嘎巴儿 149 00:07:49,500 --> 00:07:51,500 我但凡上点儿心 150 00:07:51,583 --> 00:07:53,791 它也不至于亡在我的手里 151 00:07:53,958 --> 00:07:54,416 谁? 152 00:07:54,833 --> 00:07:55,333 谁亡了? 153 00:07:55,333 --> 00:07:55,750 嘘… 154 00:07:55,916 --> 00:07:56,708 别瞒他 155 00:07:57,125 --> 00:07:58,208 到该说出来的时候了 156 00:07:58,250 --> 00:07:58,708 小马儿 157 00:07:58,750 --> 00:08:00,541 大清亡国不全怪你 158 00:08:00,666 --> 00:08:01,375 就怪我! 159 00:08:01,541 --> 00:08:02,708 就下雪那天 160 00:08:03,000 --> 00:08:04,833 老佛爷给我叫去 161 00:08:05,208 --> 00:08:06,916 一进门儿就给我按在炕头上说 162 00:08:07,166 --> 00:08:09,250 小马儿都说你有主意 163 00:08:09,375 --> 00:08:10,416 你给我出出主意 164 00:08:10,500 --> 00:08:11,708 现在咱们该怎么办 165 00:08:11,916 --> 00:08:12,458 我说呀 166 00:08:12,625 --> 00:08:14,250 人头咱们留着 167 00:08:14,500 --> 00:08:16,000 人头后面这辫子 168 00:08:16,125 --> 00:08:17,000 铰喽! 169 00:08:17,166 --> 00:08:18,708 老佛爷说:你给我说清楚什么意思 170 00:08:19,000 --> 00:08:20,166 我说很简单呐! 171 00:08:20,583 --> 00:08:21,791 从明天开始 172 00:08:21,875 --> 00:08:23,166 全国男的 173 00:08:23,666 --> 00:08:24,291 咔! 174 00:08:24,625 --> 00:08:25,750 辫子全铰喽! 175 00:08:26,166 --> 00:08:28,083 老佛爷看了我半天 176 00:08:28,541 --> 00:08:29,333 你接着说 177 00:08:29,583 --> 00:08:31,625 我说这不就是为了警示世界吗 178 00:08:31,708 --> 00:08:33,416 让他们知道咱们… 179 00:08:33,708 --> 00:08:35,458 有一颗往前走的心呐! 180 00:08:35,625 --> 00:08:36,333 小道理呀! 181 00:08:36,833 --> 00:08:37,916 老佛爷一听 182 00:08:38,041 --> 00:08:38,791 指着我说 183 00:08:38,916 --> 00:08:39,625 小子 184 00:08:40,125 --> 00:08:42,291 都说咱娘俩儿对脾气还真是! 185 00:08:43,125 --> 00:08:44,416 你赶紧现在给我出去 186 00:08:44,875 --> 00:08:45,583 马上… 187 00:08:45,875 --> 00:08:46,791 把这事给我办喽! 188 00:08:47,375 --> 00:08:48,666 我随后颁旨 189 00:08:48,833 --> 00:08:49,791 朝廷支持你! 190 00:08:50,458 --> 00:08:51,166 我高兴啊! 191 00:08:51,416 --> 00:08:52,375 嗖嗖嗖 192 00:08:52,583 --> 00:08:54,583 我这一溜小跑儿我就出了紫禁城 193 00:08:55,291 --> 00:08:55,875 喝! 194 00:08:56,500 --> 00:08:58,083 这大雪下的嘿! 195 00:08:59,083 --> 00:09:00,583 可是我浑身冒汗 196 00:09:00,833 --> 00:09:01,583 喝点儿酒 197 00:09:01,916 --> 00:09:03,333 两坛子酒喝进去了 198 00:09:05,458 --> 00:09:06,083 哎… 199 00:09:10,000 --> 00:09:11,000 等我醒过来 200 00:09:13,208 --> 00:09:14,166 民国了! 201 00:09:16,875 --> 00:09:19,291 那辫子不也都铰了吗? 202 00:09:19,458 --> 00:09:21,083 人逼着铰的 203 00:09:22,000 --> 00:09:24,083 跟自个儿主动铰的 204 00:09:25,125 --> 00:09:26,708 那是一回事儿吗? 205 00:09:27,208 --> 00:09:28,083 所以说呀 206 00:09:28,250 --> 00:09:28,750 咱俩… 207 00:09:29,250 --> 00:09:30,083 互为因果 208 00:09:31,125 --> 00:09:31,750 怎么说呢 209 00:09:32,500 --> 00:09:34,083 我但凡不喝这点儿酒 210 00:09:34,750 --> 00:09:35,958 辫子铰了 211 00:09:36,458 --> 00:09:37,416 辫子铰了 212 00:09:37,708 --> 00:09:38,416 大清… 213 00:09:38,833 --> 00:09:40,125 也不会这么快就亡 214 00:09:40,583 --> 00:09:42,291 大清不这么快亡 215 00:09:42,416 --> 00:09:45,000 你爸爸也不至于这么快就当上大帅 216 00:09:45,458 --> 00:09:45,916 哎 217 00:09:46,375 --> 00:09:47,416 也算是… 218 00:09:48,625 --> 00:09:50,041 一段儿尘缘吧 219 00:09:50,333 --> 00:09:52,625 您是打算要帮我? 220 00:09:55,208 --> 00:09:56,125 小的给 221 00:09:56,208 --> 00:09:57,708 正白乌哈拉萨虎爵赏都统 222 00:09:57,750 --> 00:09:59,041 世袭佐领兼云骑尉 223 00:09:59,083 --> 00:10:00,750 嘎图辉达拉哈多罗贝勒 224 00:10:00,791 --> 00:10:01,583 请安了! 225 00:10:01,625 --> 00:10:04,000 你得请我喝酒啊I满语) 226 00:10:04,291 --> 00:10:05,541 喝多少都算我的! (满语l 227 00:10:06,208 --> 00:10:07,000 起来吧I满语) 228 00:10:08,000 --> 00:10:08,916 叫你起来 229 00:10:09,083 --> 00:10:09,916 起来吧I满语) 230 00:10:13,250 --> 00:10:14,083 有朝一日 231 00:10:14,708 --> 00:10:16,791 我或许碰着麻烦得求到您 232 00:10:17,333 --> 00:10:19,416 但是我希望我永远碰不到这麻烦 233 00:10:20,125 --> 00:10:21,541 在我求到您之前 234 00:10:22,416 --> 00:10:24,750 我和项警官把您这点儿银子 235 00:10:24,958 --> 00:10:26,666 从New变成Old 236 00:10:26,708 --> 00:10:28,625 这事儿像是洗钱呢我怎么觉着? 237 00:10:28,708 --> 00:10:30,208 是洗钱呐! 238 00:10:30,500 --> 00:10:31,708 我没说明白吗? 239 00:10:31,875 --> 00:10:32,750 说明白了 240 00:10:33,125 --> 00:10:35,083 我用糟蹋我爸军费 241 00:10:35,166 --> 00:10:37,166 来维护太平反对战争 242 00:10:37,208 --> 00:10:38,291 这事儿不好吗? 243 00:10:38,458 --> 00:10:39,541 若是这等情操 244 00:10:39,625 --> 00:10:40,500 咱们是同一境界 245 00:10:40,625 --> 00:10:41,541 钱花完了 246 00:10:41,625 --> 00:10:42,666 境界会更高 247 00:10:43,416 --> 00:10:43,875 受累! 248 00:10:44,041 --> 00:10:44,375 好 249 00:10:44,625 --> 00:10:45,250 不客气啊 250 00:10:45,583 --> 00:10:46,666 慢走回头我找你 251 00:10:48,166 --> 00:10:49,125 这么多钱 252 00:10:49,875 --> 00:10:50,833 怎么花呀? 253 00:10:59,041 --> 00:10:59,583 一个字 254 00:11:00,333 --> 00:11:00,833 花! 255 00:11:03,958 --> 00:11:04,750 上海! 256 00:11:05,208 --> 00:11:07,333 是的还是上海! 257 00:11:07,666 --> 00:11:08,791 她是摩登之都 258 00:11:08,958 --> 00:11:10,083 时尚之都 259 00:11:10,166 --> 00:11:11,625 更是冒险之都 260 00:11:12,875 --> 00:11:14,583 环球花域总统之决选 261 00:11:14,708 --> 00:11:16,666 将在此拉开大战幕 262 00:11:17,375 --> 00:11:19,208 什么是美的真谛? 263 00:11:19,333 --> 00:11:21,166 什么是善的意义? 264 00:11:21,625 --> 00:11:25,500 本届花域大选首次面向全世界招募选手 265 00:11:25,750 --> 00:11:26,333 仅仅一天 266 00:11:26,416 --> 00:11:29,041 就有来自英、法、美、俄等各国 267 00:11:29,125 --> 00:11:30,583 上万名选手报名 268 00:11:30,750 --> 00:11:31,333 犬区赛 269 00:11:31,583 --> 00:11:32,333 大国赛 270 00:11:32,583 --> 00:11:33,416 大洲赛 271 00:11:34,125 --> 00:11:36,791 花域大选迎来上海之总决选 272 00:11:38,000 --> 00:11:41,291 上海各租界全部加入举办地的争夺 273 00:11:41,458 --> 00:11:44,000 最终法警署警官-顶飞田 274 00:11:44,083 --> 00:11:45,541 为法租界之-大世界 275 00:11:45,625 --> 00:11:47,541 争到最高主办权 276 00:11:47,791 --> 00:11:49,500 不是我们选择了花域大选 277 00:11:49,583 --> 00:11:51,583 而是花域大选选择了我们 278 00:11:51,791 --> 00:11:52,750 我想告诉太家 279 00:11:52,875 --> 00:11:54,416 大世界不仅是霞飞路的 280 00:11:54,500 --> 00:11:55,250 也是南市区的 281 00:11:55,375 --> 00:11:56,583 更是全上海的! 282 00:11:57,041 --> 00:11:58,875 来自湖牙小镇的苏珊娜 283 00:11:59,041 --> 00:12:01,333 因为等待威格女王的签字盖章 284 00:12:01,583 --> 00:12:02,791 错过报名时间 285 00:12:03,000 --> 00:12:03,916 伤心静绝 286 00:12:04,125 --> 00:12:05,083 跳楼自杀 287 00:12:05,375 --> 00:12:06,791 客居上海之欧侨 288 00:12:06,875 --> 00:12:08,250 为其发起请愿活动 289 00:12:08,625 --> 00:12:11,791 并得到广大上海市民的支持 290 00:12:12,208 --> 00:12:13,833 组委会主席-马走日 291 00:12:14,000 --> 00:12:15,750 不得不发表公开声明: 292 00:12:16,083 --> 00:12:17,041 花域.丈选 293 00:12:17,416 --> 00:12:18,250 改成下公开赛 294 00:12:18,458 --> 00:12:20,000 这是花选改变的一小步 295 00:12:20,291 --> 00:12:22,416 也将是美人进化史上的一大步· 296 00:12:22,625 --> 00:12:24,208 在追寻、追求美的道路上 297 00:12:24,500 --> 00:12:27,291 全世界会不会有 个统一的标准 298 00:12:27,791 --> 00:12:29,583 现在元弟我并不敢妄言 299 00:12:29,750 --> 00:12:30,291 但是我相信 300 00:12:30,375 --> 00:12:31,416 探寻答案的过程 301 00:12:31,583 --> 00:12:33,666 需要我们大家每一个人的一颗包容的心 302 00:12:34,250 --> 00:12:35,291 同时我也相信 303 00:12:35,333 --> 00:12:36,916 未来的人类和聪明的男女 304 00:12:37,000 --> 00:12:38,000 一定会站在我们这=边, 305 00:12:38,083 --> 00:12:39,458 来自国际花域事业的 306 00:12:39,541 --> 00:12:42,583 书十二个国家的两万零六名选手 307 00:12:42,666 --> 00:12:45,416 将为整个世界寻找答案 308 00:12:45,833 --> 00:12:47,625 让我们祝福上官青卢 309 00:12:47,875 --> 00:12:48,916 白孤福斯特 310 00:12:49,000 --> 00:12:49,916 完颜英 311 00:12:50,000 --> 00:12:51,583 她们将面对全世界 312 00:12:51,750 --> 00:12:53,166 回到追美的起点 313 00:12:53,333 --> 00:12:56,125 证眼自己无愧f我化的选择 314 00:12:56,375 --> 00:12:58,708 无愧干永恒的时光 315 00:16:07,333 --> 00:16:09,875 Mesdames et Messieurs!(女士们、先生们) 316 00:16:10,208 --> 00:16:12,833 Today is history! 317 00:16:13,000 --> 00:16:16,291 今天我们铸就奇迹 318 00:16:16,458 --> 00:16:19,541 Today we make history! 319 00:16:19,625 --> 00:16:22,708 今天我们见证奇迹 320 00:16:22,791 --> 00:16:27,166 And today we are a part of history! 321 00:16:27,208 --> 00:16:31,875 我们就是奇迹本人 322 00:16:32,375 --> 00:16:34,750 环球第三度 323 00:16:34,833 --> 00:16:38,291 花域总统总决选 324 00:16:38,416 --> 00:16:41,291 开选啦! 325 00:16:42,000 --> 00:16:42,791 卑职! 326 00:16:42,791 --> 00:16:45,250 能攻心贝g反侧自消 327 00:16:45,333 --> 00:16:46,958 道德良心测量者 328 00:16:47,041 --> 00:16:48,583 项警官飞田! 329 00:16:51,250 --> 00:16:51,583 鄙人! 330 00:16:51,666 --> 00:16:54,250 善审势故宽严有度 331 00:16:54,333 --> 00:16:56,416 公众姿势确定人 332 00:16:56,500 --> 00:16:58,166 马先生走日! 333 00:16:59,916 --> 00:17:02,791 今天历史被我们选择 334 00:17:02,875 --> 00:17:04,458 花域一大步 335 00:17:04,750 --> 00:17:06,500 地球一大步! 336 00:17:07,166 --> 00:17:08,041 今天 337 00:17:08,375 --> 00:17:11,958 我们也被历史选择着 338 00:17:12,250 --> 00:17:13,291 壮哉 339 00:17:13,375 --> 00:17:14,291 洋哉 340 00:17:14,375 --> 00:17:15,916 不亦幸哉! 341 00:17:16,166 --> 00:17:19,458 人类终于可以主宰自己的命运 342 00:17:19,750 --> 00:17:23,583 一个人的声音全球的人类听 343 00:17:23,750 --> 00:17:24,583 俗称… 344 00:17:24,666 --> 00:17:25,833 直播! 345 00:17:27,791 --> 00:17:30,541 这只幸运的麦克风啊 346 00:17:31,166 --> 00:17:36,000 它将吮吸着谁人声带所发出的声音 347 00:17:36,041 --> 00:17:40,250 并将其送达全世界人类之耳鼓 348 00:17:40,416 --> 00:17:44,583 进而直抵他们的心田呢I 349 00:17:44,791 --> 00:17:45,791 他就是… 350 00:17:45,833 --> 00:17:46,958 人类的宠儿 351 00:17:47,000 --> 00:17:47,958 上海的骄傲 352 00:17:48,000 --> 00:17:49,500 鄙人的发小 353 00:17:49,625 --> 00:17:51,250 项飞田! 354 00:18:02,916 --> 00:18:03,500 喂! 355 00:18:06,500 --> 00:18:07,541 亮起来啦! 356 00:18:08,041 --> 00:18:10,916 全球的旗帜都亮起来啦 357 00:18:11,125 --> 00:18:13,708 人类首次直播 358 00:18:13,958 --> 00:18:15,375 播直啦! 359 00:18:16,416 --> 00:18:18,541 那么为了听咱们的直播 360 00:18:19,166 --> 00:18:21,291 全世界的人都得醒着吧? 361 00:18:21,333 --> 00:18:22,125 都醒着 362 00:18:22,208 --> 00:18:23,750 哎呦那可够懂事儿的 363 00:18:23,833 --> 00:18:26,208 那咱们也得办点懂事几的事儿吧 364 00:18:26,250 --> 00:18:28,000 咱们俩还能怎么懂事儿呢? 365 00:18:28,083 --> 00:18:30,083 直播需简洁明了哇! 366 00:18:30,125 --> 00:18:32,541 谁将是最高的三甲呢? 367 00:18:32,666 --> 00:18:34,833 上官青卢! 368 00:18:34,958 --> 00:18:38,125 白狐White Tiger Foster! 369 00:18:38,291 --> 00:18:40,125 一个青卢、一个白狐 370 00:18:40,208 --> 00:18:41,375 天上的星象 371 00:18:41,500 --> 00:18:43,083 左青卢、右白狐 372 00:18:43,291 --> 00:18:44,625 前朱雀、后玄武嘛 373 00:18:44,750 --> 00:18:46,833 哦这明明是三甲 374 00:18:46,958 --> 00:18:48,041 怎么四个名儿出来了? 375 00:18:48,166 --> 00:18:49,291 谁当了总统 376 00:18:49,375 --> 00:18:50,291 谁是玄武 377 00:18:50,333 --> 00:18:51,833 那前朱雀呢 378 00:18:51,875 --> 00:18:52,666 前总统 379 00:18:52,708 --> 00:18:53,291 是谁呀 380 00:18:53,375 --> 00:18:54,208 那就是 381 00:18:54,250 --> 00:18:56,083 完颜英! 382 00:18:57,250 --> 00:18:58,291 听啊! 383 00:18:58,541 --> 00:19:00,333 太平洋的季风 384 00:19:00,583 --> 00:19:04,583 已撩拨起黄浦江的热浪 385 00:19:04,708 --> 00:19:05,541 看呐! 386 00:19:05,625 --> 00:19:07,750 全人类涌动的春潮 387 00:19:07,875 --> 00:19:11,291 正翻滚着大上海的自豪 388 00:19:11,375 --> 00:19:12,833 让我们共享 389 00:19:13,000 --> 00:19:14,833 白狐福斯特 390 00:19:15,166 --> 00:19:18,625 意乱情迷的夏日阳光! 391 00:19:18,666 --> 00:19:22,125 Now White Tiger Foster. As she shares with us 392 00:19:22,291 --> 00:19:26,666 The beauty and passion of Summer Time! 393 00:20:27,208 --> 00:20:28,333 这位是武六 394 00:20:28,541 --> 00:20:29,833 武七的姐姐 395 00:20:30,750 --> 00:20:34,125 她呀梦想着变成中国的卢米埃尔 396 00:20:34,875 --> 00:20:35,333 这不嘛 397 00:20:35,666 --> 00:20:37,833 她弄了好几十台摄影机 398 00:20:38,083 --> 00:20:39,458 在拍这次竞选 399 00:20:40,625 --> 00:20:42,500 可是她拍的这个电影 400 00:20:42,791 --> 00:20:43,875 后来起名叫 401 00:20:43,958 --> 00:20:45,708 《枪毙马走日》! 402 00:22:02,791 --> 00:22:04,708 白狐福斯特小姐 403 00:22:04,791 --> 00:22:07,083 把母爱表演得淋漓尽致 404 00:22:07,166 --> 00:22:09,083 让人几欲潜然泪下 405 00:22:09,166 --> 00:22:10,375 此等巅峰 406 00:22:10,583 --> 00:22:11,958 实难逾越! 407 00:22:13,333 --> 00:22:16,291 表演有什么难以逾越的呢? 408 00:22:16,708 --> 00:22:18,375 要说难以逾越 409 00:22:19,000 --> 00:22:21,208 也应当是母爱呀! 410 00:22:21,833 --> 00:22:24,833 母爱也不能凭空而来吧? 411 00:22:24,875 --> 00:22:27,958 但是只有一个好妈怕是不够的 412 00:22:28,083 --> 00:22:29,208 还得给她找一个 413 00:22:29,291 --> 00:22:30,125 爱她的 414 00:22:30,208 --> 00:22:31,125 疼她的 415 00:22:31,208 --> 00:22:32,666 愿意听她倾诉的 416 00:22:33,083 --> 00:22:35,083 亲爱的爸爸 417 00:23:26,041 --> 00:23:28,250 这是鸵鸟的羽毛 418 00:23:28,625 --> 00:23:30,000 一只鸵鸟啊 419 00:23:30,041 --> 00:23:32,416 只有胳肢窝底下那几根儿毛儿才配上台 420 00:23:32,416 --> 00:23:34,000 只有胳肢窝底下那几根儿毛儿才配上夸 421 00:23:34,416 --> 00:23:37,375 您瞅瞅这满世界的白羽 422 00:23:37,625 --> 00:23:39,833 得多少只鸵鸟哇 423 00:23:40,416 --> 00:23:43,083 可是我们一分钱都没花 424 00:23:43,375 --> 00:23:46,458 因为选手们的吃住行用 425 00:23:46,666 --> 00:23:49,333 冬旷;听在国置办 426 00:23:49,541 --> 00:23:50,458 除此 427 00:23:50,541 --> 00:23:54,791 她们还得给我们交上不菲的报名费 428 00:23:55,375 --> 00:23:57,250 武七少爷这些钱 429 00:23:57,375 --> 00:23:59,750 还没洗就白了一片 430 00:24:00,083 --> 00:24:03,583 关键是您得组织一个大的比赛 431 00:24:03,958 --> 00:24:06,125 最好是Global(环球)的 432 00:25:00,291 --> 00:25:02,666 哎…咱不能给观众默哀呀 433 00:25:02,916 --> 00:25:04,041 不不是 434 00:25:04,208 --> 00:25:06,208 我就说这爹呀太狠了 435 00:25:06,416 --> 00:25:08,041 把自己家闺女逼成这样 436 00:25:08,083 --> 00:25:08,416 是 437 00:25:08,666 --> 00:25:10,625 人桥上咣!跳下去了 438 00:25:11,125 --> 00:25:11,750 项警官 439 00:25:12,000 --> 00:25:13,583 你可不能这样对待你的闺女啊 440 00:25:13,791 --> 00:25:15,375 哎!卑职尚未婚娶 441 00:25:15,583 --> 00:25:16,875 尚未婚娶! 442 00:25:17,041 --> 00:25:17,625 为什么呀? 443 00:25:18,041 --> 00:25:19,083 那都是麻烦 444 00:25:19,833 --> 00:25:20,916 您倒是不麻烦了 445 00:25:21,125 --> 00:25:22,833 我麻烦了直播麻烦了 446 00:25:23,250 --> 00:25:24,000 什么麻烦? 447 00:25:24,083 --> 00:25:25,458 前总统完颜 448 00:25:25,583 --> 00:25:25,958 不见了! 449 00:25:26,000 --> 00:25:26,583 啊?! 450 00:25:26,833 --> 00:25:29,125 该她上台出演了这怎么直播呀? 451 00:25:29,166 --> 00:25:29,625 就是啊 452 00:25:29,708 --> 00:25:31,666 前座后台都寻她不见 453 00:25:31,750 --> 00:25:33,041 只找到这么张纸条 454 00:25:33,083 --> 00:25:33,791 怎么说的? 455 00:25:34,166 --> 00:25:36,000 啊!亲爱的朋友 456 00:25:36,208 --> 00:25:38,250 我爱着这花域的桂冠 457 00:25:38,583 --> 00:25:40,458 更爱这后生的蓬勃 458 00:25:40,708 --> 00:25:42,958 为了美丽的新总统的出观 459 00:25:43,333 --> 00:25:45,666 我愿意放弃这次决选 460 00:25:45,791 --> 00:25:46,208 啊?! 461 00:25:46,291 --> 00:25:47,875 假如你们不答应我 462 00:25:48,166 --> 00:25:49,958 我就要从这威客桥上 463 00:25:50,083 --> 00:25:53,458 跳入那滔滔的黄浦江里I 464 00:25:53,666 --> 00:25:55,541 真能胡扯呀你们俩 465 00:25:55,791 --> 00:25:57,041 老总统来了 466 00:25:57,208 --> 00:25:59,541 我就说我弃权我可没说我跳河 467 00:26:00,291 --> 00:26:01,750 我不是跟你们说过了么 468 00:26:02,333 --> 00:26:03,208 我不上台 469 00:26:03,375 --> 00:26:06,166 本来这蛋里边儿走出的啊应该是您 470 00:26:06,333 --> 00:26:08,083 现在我们哥儿俩款款而来 471 00:26:08,166 --> 00:26:08,875 这不像话呀 472 00:26:09,000 --> 00:26:09,833 完颜总统 473 00:26:09,958 --> 00:26:12,750 你还是跟全球的观众解释一下吧 474 00:26:12,833 --> 00:26:14,083 这有什么好解释的 475 00:26:14,250 --> 00:26:15,333 今年不是公开赛吗 476 00:26:15,541 --> 00:26:16,041 Open 477 00:26:16,541 --> 00:26:18,791 Open就是想参赛就能参赛 478 00:26:18,875 --> 00:26:21,416 您要是不想参赛您就能不参赛 479 00:26:22,000 --> 00:26:23,583 今儿晚上我看白狐就挺好 480 00:26:23,791 --> 00:26:24,708 既然环球评选 481 00:26:24,791 --> 00:26:26,000 可以有一个白人总统 482 00:26:26,500 --> 00:26:27,500 另外青卢也成 483 00:26:27,875 --> 00:26:29,291 总统还是新人当的好 484 00:26:29,708 --> 00:26:30,416 再说… 485 00:26:30,625 --> 00:26:31,833 我己然不年轻了 486 00:26:31,958 --> 00:26:33,458 嘿!您年轻! 487 00:26:33,500 --> 00:26:34,250 你闭嘴! 488 00:26:35,166 --> 00:26:36,750 我都当了两届总统了 489 00:26:36,791 --> 00:26:38,000 真不想再连任了 490 00:26:38,375 --> 00:26:39,791 要么白人要么新人 491 00:26:39,875 --> 00:26:41,041 反正甭选我 492 00:26:41,125 --> 00:26:43,291 哎呀钦佩雅量! 493 00:26:43,458 --> 00:26:45,166 既然您不想当了 494 00:26:45,250 --> 00:26:46,166 干吗还来呀? 495 00:26:46,333 --> 00:26:47,625 总统我悬不想当了 496 00:26:47,916 --> 00:26:49,583 花域的事我总得关心吧 497 00:26:49,916 --> 00:26:52,333 既然章程规定我这个总统必须到场 498 00:26:52,375 --> 00:26:53,041 那我就来 499 00:26:53,416 --> 00:26:54,791 就算章程没这个规定 500 00:26:54,833 --> 00:26:55,833 我也一定会来 501 00:26:56,458 --> 00:26:57,625 我要告诉大家伙儿 502 00:26:57,708 --> 00:26:59,208 刚才那些跳舞的Lady们 503 00:26:59,250 --> 00:27:01,833 人家不远万里不收一分钱来到上海 504 00:27:02,000 --> 00:27:03,291 为我们增光添彩 505 00:27:03,833 --> 00:27:05,041 人家是多么地了不起 506 00:27:05,125 --> 00:27:06,291 多么地无私啊! 507 00:27:07,875 --> 00:27:09,416 您说我这个前总统 508 00:27:09,583 --> 00:27:11,541 有什么理由儿不出现在现场 509 00:27:11,583 --> 00:27:13,291 人家话说得多好啊 510 00:27:13,375 --> 00:27:13,833 是是吧 511 00:27:14,041 --> 00:27:15,958 老总统刚才老说这章程 512 00:27:16,000 --> 00:27:17,291 它是个什么章程 513 00:27:17,375 --> 00:27:18,416 您能给解释解释吗? 514 00:27:18,500 --> 00:27:21,000 评选章程第七十八条 515 00:27:21,333 --> 00:27:22,708 第四款规定: 516 00:27:23,000 --> 00:27:25,916 凡是入选总决赛的选手 517 00:27:26,041 --> 00:27:30,916 有星仅有放弃至多两轮儿比赛的权利 518 00:27:30,958 --> 00:27:32,000 那要这么着的话 519 00:27:32,083 --> 00:27:33,500 那咱就别再耽误工夫啦 520 00:27:33,541 --> 00:27:33,750 嗯 521 00:27:33,791 --> 00:27:35,541 Now WhiteTiger Foster 522 00:27:35,625 --> 00:27:37,416 S9uth Pacific! (南太平洋! 》 523 00:28:01,083 --> 00:28:05,833 完颜英始终相信她是完颜阿骨打的孙女 524 00:28:07,000 --> 00:28:10,125 我说我还是阿骨打本人呢 525 00:28:10,708 --> 00:28:14,291 就这么着完颜爱上了我 526 00:28:15,125 --> 00:28:16,541 我的回答是… 527 00:28:17,250 --> 00:28:18,166 Me l-o01 528 00:28:20,041 --> 00:28:24,541 好些个朋友都说我们俩是青梅竹马 529 00:28:24,875 --> 00:28:25,958 我们俩呀 530 00:28:26,250 --> 00:28:29,583 可算是青梅不可以说是竹马 531 00:28:30,000 --> 00:28:31,750 我们俩这关系呢 532 00:28:31,791 --> 00:28:34,416 要多近有多近 533 00:28:34,541 --> 00:28:37,333 要多远有多远 534 00:28:39,500 --> 00:28:44,083 完颜英做过两届花域前总统 535 00:28:44,791 --> 00:28:47,666 可惜 那个时候花域的版图 536 00:28:47,916 --> 00:28:50,833 仅限于上海的地界儿 537 00:28:52,333 --> 00:28:55,333 此次又碰上她的卫冕之战 538 00:28:55,666 --> 00:28:58,416 对手全变成国际的了 539 00:28:59,083 --> 00:29:00,916 美利坚的白狐 540 00:29:01,083 --> 00:29:03,166 欧罗巴的青卢 541 00:29:03,458 --> 00:29:07,875 我和项飞田打算让她再进一步 542 00:29:08,208 --> 00:29:09,708 一百尺竿头嘛 543 00:29:31,833 --> 00:29:33,666 Mesdames et Messieurs! (女士们、先生们) 544 00:29:33,750 --> 00:29:34,958 女士们、先生们! 545 00:29:35,666 --> 00:29:36,750 寰宇直播 546 00:29:37,416 --> 00:29:39,041 环球沸腾了! 547 00:29:39,083 --> 00:29:43,000 我们现在已经收到全世界两千三百多封电报 548 00:29:43,166 --> 00:29:44,208 分别来自 549 00:29:44,458 --> 00:29:46,666 英、法、澳、日、俄、比、德! 550 00:29:46,708 --> 00:29:48,416 那这么多国家念哪个呢? 551 00:29:48,458 --> 00:29:50,541 念那个不念哪个都得罪人 552 00:29:50,583 --> 00:29:51,916 那咱们念个地区的 553 00:29:51,958 --> 00:29:52,958 有比地区还小的吗 554 00:29:53,041 --> 00:29:54,000 那就是家庭了 555 00:29:54,041 --> 00:29:54,875 比家庭还小 556 00:29:54,958 --> 00:29:56,208 那就是个人了 557 00:29:56,375 --> 00:29:57,708 个人太多了吧! 558 00:29:57,750 --> 00:29:58,791 念惨的呀 559 00:29:59,125 --> 00:30:00,083 啊!这个惨! 560 00:30:00,250 --> 00:30:03,166 库尔尼西亚二等兵卡布丹诺维奇 561 00:30:03,416 --> 00:30:04,708 忧伤绝笔! 562 00:30:05,041 --> 00:30:06,083 敌我双方 563 00:30:06,250 --> 00:30:08,541 响应号召停战至今 564 00:30:08,875 --> 00:30:10,708 一等再等却不见完颜 565 00:30:10,875 --> 00:30:12,333 完颜若战 566 00:30:12,500 --> 00:30:14,541 我等继续停战 567 00:30:14,833 --> 00:30:16,291 完颜不战 568 00:30:16,416 --> 00:30:18,458 我等将立即开战! 569 00:30:18,541 --> 00:30:19,750 什么意思啊这是? 570 00:30:19,833 --> 00:30:20,916 他意思是说 571 00:30:21,125 --> 00:30:23,416 完颜总统再不上台 572 00:30:23,625 --> 00:30:26,083 他们将立即开打 573 00:30:26,208 --> 00:30:26,833 啊! 574 00:30:28,166 --> 00:30:29,250 老总统啊 575 00:30:29,291 --> 00:30:30,791 别打了别打了我上来了 576 00:30:30,833 --> 00:30:31,750 你们听见了吗? 577 00:30:31,791 --> 00:30:32,375 听不见 578 00:30:32,541 --> 00:30:33,708 这不是寰宇直播吗? 579 00:30:34,000 --> 00:30:36,333 是直播、但不是电话 580 00:30:36,416 --> 00:30:38,583 急吗老总统要不然发个电报? 581 00:30:38,625 --> 00:30:40,708 不着急?哪儿都快打起来了 582 00:30:41,125 --> 00:30:42,916 你们男人怎么那么爱打仗啊: 583 00:30:43,625 --> 00:30:45,416 我看就是欠打! 584 00:30:46,000 --> 00:30:47,916 孩子都应该回到妈妈的怀抱 585 00:30:48,000 --> 00:30:49,916 男人都应该回到女人的怀抱 586 00:30:50,291 --> 00:30:51,916 都来女人的怀抱吧 587 00:30:52,125 --> 00:30:54,541 被拥抱的男人是不会出去打仗的 588 00:30:56,750 --> 00:30:58,083 女人多好啊! 589 00:30:58,208 --> 00:31:01,000 干吗非要在这儿评比分出个高下呢?对吧 590 00:31:01,041 --> 00:31:01,625 是是是 591 00:31:01,750 --> 00:31:02,750 青卢这样儿 592 00:31:06,041 --> 00:31:07,375 白狐这样儿 593 00:31:10,125 --> 00:31:12,083 不都挺漂亮挺美的吗 594 00:31:12,666 --> 00:31:15,666 我之所以不上台就是不想争不想比 595 00:31:15,916 --> 00:31:17,875 您瞧瞧我又说多了 596 00:31:17,916 --> 00:31:18,833 不多不多不多 597 00:31:19,041 --> 00:31:19,958 -说得好e安静-安静 598 00:31:20,000 --> 00:31:21,500 按照您的意思 599 00:31:21,750 --> 00:31:23,041 四自们应该怎么办呐? 600 00:31:23,166 --> 00:31:24,250 少往里争 601 00:31:24,375 --> 00:31:25,458 多往外拿 602 00:31:25,666 --> 00:31:26,500 您不高兴了 603 00:31:26,708 --> 00:31:27,708 请人家吃顿饭 604 00:31:28,083 --> 00:31:29,583 他高兴您也高兴 605 00:31:29,625 --> 00:31:31,083 每个人都往外给 606 00:31:31,416 --> 00:31:32,916 这世界不就和平了吗 607 00:31:33,000 --> 00:31:34,083 那你就先给点儿吧! 608 00:31:34,625 --> 00:31:36,000 给点儿哪儿成啊 609 00:31:36,291 --> 00:31:37,541 要给就全给 610 00:31:37,625 --> 00:31:39,750 我打算把我的家产全部捐出 611 00:31:39,916 --> 00:31:41,916 每一件首饰、每一套衣裳 612 00:31:42,000 --> 00:31:43,750 每一辆车、每一处儿房 613 00:31:44,125 --> 00:31:45,833 所有的、一切的、彻底的 614 00:31:45,958 --> 00:31:47,083 全部捐出去 615 00:31:47,208 --> 00:31:47,958 啊?! 616 00:31:48,458 --> 00:31:49,458 捐给谁呀? 617 00:31:49,500 --> 00:31:50,000 就是啊 618 00:31:50,125 --> 00:31:51,708 那些喝不上奶的孩子 619 00:31:52,000 --> 00:31:53,583 那些身无分文无家可归 620 00:31:53,666 --> 00:31:55,625 又胸怀大志的青年 621 00:31:55,791 --> 00:31:58,291 那些需要女人又没有慰藉的老人 622 00:31:58,458 --> 00:31:59,875 谁需要捐给谁 623 00:32:00,083 --> 00:32:01,458 没有任何中间环节 624 00:32:01,791 --> 00:32:02,583 直接地捐 625 00:32:02,791 --> 00:32:03,500 裸捐! 626 00:32:05,916 --> 00:32:07,500 别鼓掌别鼓掌! 627 00:32:07,875 --> 00:32:09,250 哎,嘘… 628 00:32:09,333 --> 00:32:11,333 一不做二不休我现在决定 629 00:32:11,583 --> 00:32:12,833 家产我捐了 630 00:32:13,041 --> 00:32:14,708 自个儿我也捐! 631 00:32:15,083 --> 00:32:16,041 捐我的过去 632 00:32:16,083 --> 00:32:16,416 啊? 633 00:32:16,458 --> 00:32:17,208 捐我的现在 634 00:32:17,250 --> 00:32:17,791 啊? 635 00:32:17,833 --> 00:32:18,875 捐我的未来 636 00:32:18,916 --> 00:32:19,875 啊?!… 637 00:32:19,958 --> 00:32:22,458 啊…你们都张着嘴别闭啊 638 00:32:22,625 --> 00:32:23,833 你们俩也是啊 639 00:32:24,250 --> 00:32:25,333 你们是不是想问 640 00:32:25,416 --> 00:32:27,125 过去现在还可以理解 641 00:32:27,250 --> 00:32:28,291 未来怎么捐呀 642 00:32:28,541 --> 00:32:30,291 我打算拍卖我的初嫁权 643 00:32:30,375 --> 00:32:32,083 三十天价高者得 644 00:32:32,166 --> 00:32:33,750 一会儿就拍就在这儿拍 645 00:32:34,125 --> 00:32:36,208 请大家踊跃出价不吝爱心 646 00:32:36,416 --> 00:32:38,291 所有善款完颜一毛不留 647 00:32:38,416 --> 00:32:39,666 全部捐出去! 648 00:32:41,333 --> 00:32:42,041 啊? 649 00:32:42,166 --> 00:32:44,750 你刚才说捐…什么来着? 650 00:32:44,916 --> 00:32:45,833 初嫁权 651 00:32:45,875 --> 00:32:46,541 啊! 652 00:32:47,208 --> 00:32:48,708 你们觉得很可笑是吧 653 00:32:49,250 --> 00:32:51,166 想说身为花域一员的我 654 00:32:51,250 --> 00:32:52,083 何谈初嫁呀? 655 00:32:52,333 --> 00:32:53,208 老话儿说 656 00:32:53,333 --> 00:32:55,375 苟日新日日新又日新 657 00:32:55,583 --> 00:32:57,083 从前种种臂如昨日死 658 00:32:57,375 --> 00:32:59,166 从后种种譬如今日生 659 00:32:59,250 --> 00:33:00,583 每天的太阳是新的 660 00:33:00,708 --> 00:33:01,833 像婴儿初生的脸 661 00:33:02,166 --> 00:33:04,458 每天阳光照耀的露珠是新的 662 00:33:04,541 --> 00:33:06,333 催开的花朵是新的 663 00:33:06,416 --> 00:33:08,291 每天早晨醒来的你我 664 00:33:08,541 --> 00:33:09,916 难道不是新的! 665 00:33:11,250 --> 00:33:13,416 华灯初上的每个夜晚 666 00:33:13,500 --> 00:33:15,708 难道每一嫁不是初嫁 667 00:33:17,291 --> 00:33:19,041 你会发现爱的秘诀 668 00:33:19,416 --> 00:33:21,833 就是永远把每一次当作 669 00:33:22,333 --> 00:33:23,458 第一回! 670 00:33:25,416 --> 00:33:28,000 完颜!完颜!完颜! 671 00:33:28,500 --> 00:33:29,583 诸位诸位诸位 672 00:33:29,750 --> 00:33:30,791 我必须告诉大家 673 00:33:31,166 --> 00:33:32,916 决选的章程有规定 674 00:33:33,000 --> 00:33:34,708 新总统花落谁家 675 00:33:34,791 --> 00:33:37,416 是靠我们吼声高低来决定 676 00:33:37,500 --> 00:33:39,208 我们最后一个环节 677 00:33:39,291 --> 00:33:40,958 青卢白狐 678 00:33:41,208 --> 00:33:42,875 再次登场 679 00:33:43,500 --> 00:33:46,291 现场有没有支持白孤的 680 00:33:48,291 --> 00:33:49,791 完颜!完颜!完颜! 681 00:33:49,875 --> 00:33:51,333 那青卢呢? 682 00:33:51,458 --> 00:33:55,583 完颜!完颜!完颜! 683 00:34:00,416 --> 00:34:03,291 完颜英在我和项飞田的安排下 684 00:34:03,541 --> 00:34:06,666 就这么当上了花域的大总统 685 00:34:07,125 --> 00:34:09,416 这原本是故事的结束 686 00:34:09,583 --> 00:34:10,250 可是… 687 00:34:10,583 --> 00:34:13,375 却变成了各种意外的开始 688 00:34:13,500 --> 00:34:14,416 好消息! 689 00:34:14,916 --> 00:34:16,083 强尼回电 690 00:34:16,416 --> 00:34:17,916 完颜登台 691 00:34:18,250 --> 00:34:19,833 全线停火 692 00:34:20,083 --> 00:34:21,708 永远停战! 693 00:34:21,791 --> 00:34:23,041 停战 694 00:34:23,958 --> 00:34:27,291 完颜!完颜!完颜! 695 00:34:33,583 --> 00:34:34,708 寰宇的听众 696 00:34:34,958 --> 00:34:36,541 现场的罴宾 697 00:34:36,875 --> 00:34:38,208 今晚的总决选 698 00:34:38,458 --> 00:34:40,666 还剩下最后、最大的 699 00:34:40,875 --> 00:34:41,750 Surprise! (惊喜!) 700 00:34:41,875 --> 00:34:42,708 那就是 701 00:34:42,958 --> 00:34:48,041 谁将为新当选的花域大总统加冕 702 00:34:49,083 --> 00:34:49,541 她 703 00:34:50,083 --> 00:34:51,333 冲破云霄 704 00:34:51,666 --> 00:34:52,708 照亮天际 705 00:34:53,166 --> 00:34:54,541 穿越夕、间 706 00:34:55,083 --> 00:34:56,500 来到这里 707 00:34:56,750 --> 00:34:57,458 她便是 708 00:34:58,000 --> 00:34:58,416 赛! 709 00:34:58,958 --> 00:34:59,375 二! 710 00:34:59,916 --> 00:35:00,375 爷! 711 00:35:05,666 --> 00:35:08,708 她来自遥远星辰 712 00:35:09,375 --> 00:35:10,916 光芒四射 713 00:35:11,541 --> 00:35:14,583 她是上天最完美的恩赐 714 00:35:15,416 --> 00:35:19,083 她是人类最杰出的作品 715 00:35:26,166 --> 00:35:28,250 她是赛二爷 716 00:35:28,750 --> 00:35:30,666 赛;-爷晨她 717 00:35:31,000 --> 00:35:34,291 一个女也的她 718 00:35:35,916 --> 00:35:37,458 现场的朋友们 719 00:35:38,000 --> 00:35:40,583 整个世界都在关注你们 720 00:35:40,791 --> 00:35:42,333 在羡慕你们 721 00:35:43,166 --> 00:35:43,625 请用您们的行动 722 00:35:43,666 --> 00:35:44,625 请用您们的行动 723 00:35:44,875 --> 00:35:47,416 支持完颜总统的义卖 724 00:35:48,250 --> 00:35:52,083 赛二爷给完颜总统戴上桂冠的一刻 725 00:35:52,625 --> 00:35:57,041 即是落锤定音之时! 726 00:36:13,583 --> 00:36:15,958 大功就这么告成了 727 00:36:16,625 --> 00:36:19,375 武七少爷的钱洗白了 728 00:36:19,708 --> 00:36:22,125 可是也都白洗了 729 00:36:22,708 --> 00:36:25,791 因为该花的钱花出去了 730 00:36:26,250 --> 00:36:29,625 该净的钱也都花出去了 731 00:36:35,458 --> 00:36:35,916 姑娘! 732 00:36:36,208 --> 00:36:37,375 姑娘侬慢慢走 733 00:36:37,791 --> 00:36:38,125 姑娘 734 00:36:38,541 --> 00:36:39,916 我还要跟你说一句 735 00:36:40,000 --> 00:36:40,458 您说 736 00:36:40,916 --> 00:36:41,750 你来我这儿 737 00:36:41,958 --> 00:36:43,958 饭也不吃水也不喝 738 00:36:44,041 --> 00:36:45,958 连家具都是自己带 739 00:36:46,125 --> 00:36:47,750 这金币再不拿走 740 00:36:48,083 --> 00:36:50,166 你这让我心里怎么过意得去呀 741 00:36:50,250 --> 00:36:52,083 大爷咱不是都说好了么 742 00:36:52,416 --> 00:36:53,708 说到就得做到 743 00:36:55,625 --> 00:36:57,083 那枕头套子是咱们家的吗? 744 00:36:57,208 --> 00:36:57,875 哎!姑娘 745 00:36:58,208 --> 00:36:58,500 姑娘 746 00:36:59,125 --> 00:37:01,333 这是我妈妈留给我的戒指 747 00:37:01,583 --> 00:37:02,958 我终身未娶 748 00:37:03,250 --> 00:37:04,708 现在留给你了 749 00:37:04,875 --> 00:37:05,250 大爷 750 00:37:05,625 --> 00:37:08,250 您这儿的一丝一缕我都不能沾 751 00:37:08,291 --> 00:37:11,833 我这一生有两件事儿是板上钉钉子 752 00:37:12,125 --> 00:37:14,791 第一我是阅尽了人间春色 753 00:37:15,250 --> 00:37:18,166 第二我是丧失了生活的信心 754 00:37:18,500 --> 00:37:19,708 今天你一来呀 755 00:37:20,000 --> 00:37:21,583 我这两件都成笑话了 756 00:37:21,833 --> 00:37:24,958 是你点燃了我心中的火焰呐! 757 00:37:25,083 --> 00:37:26,791 这就是我来这儿的目的呀 758 00:37:27,250 --> 00:37:29,833 就是要点着您心里头的火焰 759 00:37:29,916 --> 00:37:31,041 那你给我个电话 760 00:37:31,166 --> 00:37:31,541 钩儿姐! 761 00:37:31,625 --> 00:37:31,916 哎! 762 00:37:32,000 --> 00:37:32,916 给大爷张名片 763 00:37:33,083 --> 00:37:33,500 来了 764 00:37:34,000 --> 00:37:35,333 牛大爷这是我名片 765 00:37:35,458 --> 00:37:36,291 给我打电话 766 00:37:37,250 --> 00:37:38,583 大爷咱来日方长 767 00:37:39,000 --> 00:37:40,208 您硬硬朗朗的啊 768 00:37:40,291 --> 00:37:40,625 着车! 769 00:37:40,916 --> 00:37:43,500 我一定硬硬朗朗地等你! 770 00:37:46,791 --> 00:37:48,666 你一定要回来呀! 771 00:37:56,583 --> 00:37:57,250 下一站 772 00:37:57,958 --> 00:38:00,666 Joseph家 拉法耶特 B1389号 773 00:38:01,208 --> 00:38:03,291 钩儿姐我记得是个刘先生啊 774 00:38:03,416 --> 00:38:04,583 在艾当路59号 775 00:38:04,916 --> 00:38:06,625 当初就是刘先生拍来的 776 00:38:06,833 --> 00:38:08,791 当作一个大礼就送给了Joseph 777 00:38:08,958 --> 00:38:09,500 啊?! 778 00:38:10,166 --> 00:38:12,875 把咱们完颜姐当大礼送出去 779 00:38:12,958 --> 00:38:13,791 这行吗这个? 780 00:38:14,166 --> 00:38:15,666 咱可不能挑肥拣瘦的 781 00:38:16,583 --> 00:38:18,541 越是成功人士越得谨慎 782 00:38:19,166 --> 00:38:20,583 全世界都看着咱们呐 783 00:38:20,958 --> 00:38:22,750 去哪?去哪?什…什么路? 784 00:38:22,958 --> 00:38:24,916 拉法耶特B1389号 785 00:38:25,458 --> 00:38:27,041 早说呀在这边儿 786 00:38:28,125 --> 00:38:30,750 曹雪芹曹先生说过呀 787 00:38:31,125 --> 00:38:33,625 假作真时真亦假 788 00:38:34,083 --> 00:38:36,291 真作假时假亦真 789 00:38:36,708 --> 00:38:40,875 这完颜英啊还真把自己当成大总统了 790 00:38:41,208 --> 00:38:43,541 真把我当成她的司机了 791 00:38:43,833 --> 00:38:46,500 到处去捐钱行善 792 00:38:46,833 --> 00:38:50,916 谈笑有鸿儒往来不亵玩 793 00:38:51,208 --> 00:38:54,291 嘿!我就跟她提醒了无数回 794 00:38:54,625 --> 00:38:57,541 可她就从这梦里醒不过来 795 00:38:57,958 --> 00:39:00,875 您说这算怎么个事情呢这是 796 00:39:01,416 --> 00:39:03,958 所以啊好些个麻烦 797 00:39:04,291 --> 00:39:07,416 也就从这当中慢慢引出来了 798 00:39:07,541 --> 00:39:07,958 钩儿姐 799 00:39:08,416 --> 00:39:08,750 啊? 800 00:39:10,250 --> 00:39:11,000 咱们不是… 801 00:39:12,250 --> 00:39:13,291 去找Joseph么? 802 00:39:13,791 --> 00:39:15,166 这儿怎么写的是钟三儿啊? 803 00:39:16,958 --> 00:39:18,875 Joseph就是钟三儿的意思 804 00:39:20,750 --> 00:39:22,416 Joseph就是钟三儿的意思? 805 00:39:22,750 --> 00:39:23,083 对 806 00:39:26,041 --> 00:39:27,000 我可认识一个人 807 00:39:27,625 --> 00:39:28,541 我最讨厌的人 808 00:39:28,625 --> 00:39:29,333 他也叫钟三儿 809 00:39:29,791 --> 00:39:30,375 不会是他吧? 810 00:39:31,208 --> 00:39:32,375 就是你讨厌的那个人 811 00:39:32,583 --> 00:39:33,125 就是他 812 00:39:34,666 --> 00:39:35,041 钩儿姐 813 00:39:35,750 --> 00:39:36,583 这你就不对了 814 00:39:37,625 --> 00:39:38,333 你应该告诉我 815 00:39:38,583 --> 00:39:39,750 我不会把车开到这儿来 816 00:39:41,083 --> 00:39:42,375 完颜姐告诉过我们 817 00:39:43,041 --> 00:39:44,166 不要挑肥拣瘦 818 00:39:44,958 --> 00:39:45,916 全世界的人 819 00:39:46,500 --> 00:39:47,416 都在看着我们 820 00:39:48,041 --> 00:39:49,541 这才是花域精英 821 00:39:50,083 --> 00:39:51,041 总统的气度 822 00:39:51,708 --> 00:39:53,166 什么钟三钟四的 823 00:39:53,750 --> 00:39:54,458 一碗水端平! 824 00:39:55,333 --> 00:39:56,416 这叫境界 825 00:39:56,708 --> 00:39:58,041 连我都做不到! 826 00:40:15,291 --> 00:40:16,083 马走日 827 00:40:16,583 --> 00:40:17,750 马走日马走日! 828 00:40:18,333 --> 00:40:19,291 这可不行啊! 829 00:40:19,666 --> 00:40:20,375 不行! 830 00:40:20,666 --> 00:40:21,208 马走日! 831 00:40:21,750 --> 00:40:24,250 阿拉朋友来的嘛!!! 832 00:40:28,416 --> 00:40:29,500 北京 833 00:40:30,125 --> 00:40:31,208 上海 834 00:40:32,000 --> 00:40:32,958 巴黎 835 00:40:33,458 --> 00:40:34,500 最好的餐厅 836 00:40:35,125 --> 00:40:36,250 您就挨个儿数吧 837 00:40:36,833 --> 00:40:37,750 我都去过 838 00:40:38,708 --> 00:40:40,916 他们说吧找你吃饭 839 00:40:41,958 --> 00:40:42,791 结果一去 840 00:40:43,458 --> 00:40:43,916 哟! 841 00:40:44,875 --> 00:40:45,958 就一张桌子 842 00:40:47,000 --> 00:40:48,166 整个儿餐厅包了 843 00:40:48,958 --> 00:40:50,125 就请我一人儿 844 00:40:52,291 --> 00:40:54,166 你们男的是不是都挺喜欢这套的 845 00:40:58,458 --> 00:40:58,791 来 846 00:41:02,500 --> 00:41:05,416 这儿是全上海最高的建筑 847 00:41:07,666 --> 00:41:08,541 今儿刚开业 848 00:41:11,458 --> 00:41:12,250 我包了 849 00:41:14,166 --> 00:41:16,458 请了个最好的意大利厨子 850 00:41:18,291 --> 00:41:19,666 就款待你一人儿 851 00:41:20,291 --> 00:41:20,750 谢谢 852 00:41:21,500 --> 00:41:23,875 我八岁那年过生日吃长寿面 853 00:41:23,958 --> 00:41:25,541 我就悄悄儿地许了个愿 854 00:41:26,125 --> 00:41:28,250 要是哪天有个男的为了我和别人打起来 855 00:41:28,333 --> 00:41:29,250 我就嫁给他 856 00:41:29,750 --> 00:41:30,583 八岁呀才 857 00:41:31,833 --> 00:41:33,708 我十八岁那年这男的没出现 858 00:41:34,375 --> 00:41:36,416 二十八岁那年这男的还没出现 859 00:41:36,916 --> 00:41:38,041 我都觉得没指望了 860 00:41:39,041 --> 00:41:40,666 我可不想等到我三十八岁的时候 861 00:41:40,750 --> 00:41:41,583 这人还不出现 862 00:41:42,666 --> 00:41:43,291 你猜怎么着? 863 00:41:44,416 --> 00:41:45,875 还真有这么个人 864 00:41:46,166 --> 00:41:47,375 还真就出现了 865 00:41:48,125 --> 00:41:50,208 还真为了我把别人儿给打了 866 00:41:51,125 --> 00:41:52,208 这个人就是你 867 00:41:54,083 --> 00:41:54,666 不会吧 868 00:41:57,083 --> 00:41:58,791 你为了我打了钟三儿 869 00:41:59,666 --> 00:42:00,541 因为你妒忌了 870 00:42:00,958 --> 00:42:02,250 我妒忌他呀 871 00:42:02,625 --> 00:42:03,333 你妒忌了 872 00:42:04,541 --> 00:42:05,250 因为你爱我 873 00:42:05,375 --> 00:42:07,916 完颜咱俩都认识二三十年了 874 00:42:08,000 --> 00:42:08,708 这么熟了 875 00:42:08,791 --> 00:42:09,958 熟成哪样啊? 876 00:42:10,291 --> 00:42:12,000 熟得睡睡… 877 00:42:12,083 --> 00:42:13,416 你睡了你嫉妒了 878 00:42:14,041 --> 00:42:15,625 嫉妒了你还打了人 879 00:42:16,291 --> 00:42:18,541 你嫉妒了你打了人你还打了个熟人 880 00:42:18,625 --> 00:42:20,041 那个人还是你的朋友 881 00:42:20,625 --> 00:42:21,583 这就是爱 882 00:42:22,000 --> 00:42:23,000 我是打了钟三儿 883 00:42:23,083 --> 00:42:24,500 但是钟三儿特别讨厌 884 00:42:24,708 --> 00:42:25,916 你干什么他跟你学什么 885 00:42:26,125 --> 00:42:27,333 你喜欢什么姑娘呢 886 00:42:27,458 --> 00:42:28,625 他也喜欢什么姑娘 887 00:42:28,750 --> 00:42:31,291 男的嘛都喜欢肉多点儿的女孩 888 00:42:31,375 --> 00:42:32,333 他就敢找一胖子! 889 00:42:32,625 --> 00:42:34,541 最讨厌的是还学你唱歌! 890 00:42:34,625 --> 00:42:36,000 哎哟你还会唱歌呐 891 00:42:36,083 --> 00:42:37,041 吹口哨我说 892 00:42:37,375 --> 00:42:38,250 吹口哨也行呀 893 00:42:38,375 --> 00:42:39,208 吹一个我听听 894 00:42:39,666 --> 00:42:40,458 拉提琴呢 895 00:42:40,875 --> 00:42:41,583 Excuse me 896 00:42:42,833 --> 00:42:43,291 Thank vou 897 00:42:43,666 --> 00:42:44,583 真吹啊? 898 00:43:00,125 --> 00:43:01,583 贵妃醉鬼呀 899 00:43:02,625 --> 00:43:04,416 您还能吹得再难听点儿么 900 00:43:06,166 --> 00:43:07,833 人家胡适之说得真对 901 00:43:08,125 --> 00:43:09,250 纯粹是猫叫 902 00:43:09,666 --> 00:43:10,000 哎! 903 00:43:10,375 --> 00:43:12,416 你这辈子有没有给谁说过我爱你 904 00:43:12,666 --> 00:43:13,458 说过呀 905 00:43:13,958 --> 00:43:14,791 很多回 906 00:43:14,958 --> 00:43:15,875 不同的人 907 00:43:15,958 --> 00:43:16,750 我没听过 908 00:43:17,125 --> 00:43:21,125 宝贝我爱你!我的太阳! 909 00:43:21,250 --> 00:43:22,000 说母语 910 00:43:22,875 --> 00:43:23,333 爱你 911 00:43:23,416 --> 00:43:23,875 谁爱? 912 00:43:24,041 --> 00:43:24,375 我 913 00:43:24,541 --> 00:43:25,041 你爱谁? 914 00:43:25,166 --> 00:43:25,541 你 915 00:43:25,791 --> 00:43:26,958 仨字儿连起来说 916 00:43:27,375 --> 00:43:28,083 我爱您 917 00:43:28,250 --> 00:43:29,250 干吗您呐? 918 00:43:29,333 --> 00:43:31,541 你你的特别不尊重人 919 00:43:31,666 --> 00:43:33,041 我不要你尊重我 920 00:43:33,750 --> 00:43:35,083 我要你爱我 921 00:43:52,916 --> 00:43:55,375 当啷啷!一字肩中尾! 922 00:43:55,708 --> 00:43:56,125 嚯! 923 00:43:57,125 --> 00:43:59,083 单肩大拖尾! 924 00:43:59,291 --> 00:44:00,041 好嘛! 925 00:44:01,208 --> 00:44:03,125 抹胸高腰百褶 926 00:44:03,375 --> 00:44:04,333 您看看 927 00:44:04,791 --> 00:44:05,750 您瞅瞅 928 00:44:06,458 --> 00:44:09,166 绕颈坠珠紧身 929 00:44:09,458 --> 00:44:10,291 啊… 930 00:44:11,125 --> 00:44:11,708 还有这件儿 931 00:44:12,125 --> 00:44:13,000 俩腿儿酌 932 00:44:14,250 --> 00:44:15,291 这不就是裤子么 933 00:44:16,666 --> 00:44:17,750 这么多婚纱 934 00:44:18,208 --> 00:44:19,291 您得嫁多少回呀? 935 00:44:19,833 --> 00:44:23,125 我见到喜欢的就悄悄儿买下来 936 00:44:23,958 --> 00:44:27,125 我见到喜欢的就悄悄儿买下来 937 00:44:27,708 --> 00:44:29,500 坚持了很多年 938 00:44:32,791 --> 00:44:33,375 好看吗? 939 00:44:33,791 --> 00:44:35,041 多好看的衣服 940 00:44:35,916 --> 00:44:37,083 也不如你本身好看! 941 00:44:37,166 --> 00:44:37,875 什么意思? 942 00:44:38,541 --> 00:44:39,125 不如不穿 943 00:44:39,291 --> 00:44:39,625 呸! 944 00:44:40,416 --> 00:44:43,041 结婚也不能不穿吧 945 00:44:43,125 --> 00:44:44,208 你要跟谁结婚? 946 00:44:45,208 --> 00:44:45,791 跟你 947 00:44:46,750 --> 00:44:49,416 啊!… 948 00:44:49,750 --> 00:44:51,708 钩儿姐钩儿姐! 949 00:44:52,125 --> 00:44:53,083 钩儿姐! 950 00:44:54,833 --> 00:44:55,791 你叫钩儿姐干吗 951 00:44:56,041 --> 00:44:56,875 我叫钩儿姐 952 00:44:57,291 --> 00:44:58,125 救救我行吗 953 00:44:58,375 --> 00:44:59,416 钩儿姐能救你吗? 954 00:44:59,750 --> 00:45:00,916 要救也是救我呀 955 00:45:01,541 --> 00:45:02,833 钩儿姐没事了 956 00:45:03,416 --> 00:45:03,958 完颜 957 00:45:04,583 --> 00:45:05,625 你今天有点儿反常 958 00:45:06,375 --> 00:45:07,291 吃着吃着饭 959 00:45:07,500 --> 00:45:08,333 非说我妒忌 960 00:45:09,000 --> 00:45:10,666 妒忌完了又让我说爱你 961 00:45:11,166 --> 00:45:12,208 爱您都不行 962 00:45:12,541 --> 00:45:14,000 好不容易爱完你吧 963 00:45:14,250 --> 00:45:15,166 又弄了个结婚来 964 00:45:15,541 --> 00:45:17,666 哪有一个晚上上仨台阶的 965 00:45:17,708 --> 00:45:18,541 还这么陡 966 00:45:18,958 --> 00:45:20,208 来歇会儿 967 00:45:20,791 --> 00:45:22,166 黴哟歇会儿 968 00:45:22,333 --> 00:45:23,250 刚不歇过了吗? 969 00:45:23,333 --> 00:45:23,875 没歇够 970 00:45:24,041 --> 00:45:25,000 我妈后天过来 971 00:45:25,083 --> 00:45:27,541 你看咱下礼拜办还是过几天就办 972 00:45:29,125 --> 00:45:30,708 婚礼简简单单的就行 973 00:45:31,166 --> 00:45:31,833 我要西式的啊 974 00:45:31,916 --> 00:45:32,833 干吗西式的呀? 975 00:45:33,416 --> 00:45:35,708 我就喜欢两个人儿站在那儿 976 00:45:35,875 --> 00:45:37,208 仰着头然后说 977 00:45:38,000 --> 00:45:38,708 1 d9 i 978 00:45:39,000 --> 00:45:40,791 您知道i do是什么意思么? 979 00:45:41,208 --> 00:45:42,458 我愿意 980 00:45:42,666 --> 00:45:43,333 啊? 981 00:45:43,833 --> 00:45:44,708 错啦! 982 00:45:45,166 --> 00:45:46,583 不是这个意思 983 00:45:47,041 --> 00:45:48,041 话说英国人呐 984 00:45:48,083 --> 00:45:49,958 有句词儿叫作How do you do 985 00:45:50,291 --> 00:45:50,541 嗯 986 00:45:50,666 --> 00:45:52,708 这里边儿好几个do do是什么意思 987 00:45:53,083 --> 00:45:55,666 汉语译作:嘁、哧、咔、嚓 988 00:45:56,041 --> 00:45:57,750 英国绅士每天起床 989 00:45:58,583 --> 00:45:59,416 一溜小跑儿 990 00:45:59,833 --> 00:46:01,500 奔一胡同口的小屋子去了 991 00:46:01,750 --> 00:46:02,833 在小屋子里一待 992 00:46:03,000 --> 00:46:03,833 喊、哧、咔、嚓 993 00:46:03,958 --> 00:46:06,041 就活生生变成一个真绅士 994 00:46:06,875 --> 00:46:08,083 街对面儿也过来一位 995 00:46:08,291 --> 00:46:09,625 俩人溜溜达达看着说 996 00:46:10,083 --> 00:46:10,541 How do you do? 997 00:46:10,666 --> 00:46:11,708 这个How do you do 998 00:46:12,000 --> 00:46:12,666 什么意思啊? 999 00:46:12,791 --> 00:46:14,541 就是您Do得怎么样啊? 1000 00:46:15,333 --> 00:46:16,958 你拉屎拉得怎么样 1001 00:46:17,041 --> 00:46:17,541 对呀! 1002 00:46:18,125 --> 00:46:19,541 就是指的上厕所 1003 00:46:20,000 --> 00:46:21,166 这不值得乐这事儿 1004 00:46:21,333 --> 00:46:23,291 Do不好咔脑溢血 1005 00:46:23,583 --> 00:46:24,458 我不是吓唬你啊 1006 00:46:24,666 --> 00:46:26,458 恺撒大帝、尼鲁 1007 00:46:26,750 --> 00:46:28,583 还有乔治二世全是那么死的 1008 00:46:29,291 --> 00:46:31,000 所以说啊完颜 1009 00:46:31,916 --> 00:46:34,166 婚礼上怎么能说Do呢 1010 00:46:34,666 --> 00:46:35,541 来好多朋友 1011 00:46:35,791 --> 00:46:36,333 一Do 1012 00:46:36,500 --> 00:46:37,583 咔!死一片 1013 00:46:37,958 --> 00:46:38,958 您这是何必呢! 1014 00:46:40,916 --> 00:46:42,125 哦我明白了 1015 00:46:42,416 --> 00:46:42,833 嗯 1016 00:46:43,791 --> 00:46:45,791 可是婚礼就得办西式的 1017 00:46:46,916 --> 00:46:48,625 就得说ldo 1018 00:46:49,333 --> 00:46:50,750 必须说ldo 1019 00:46:50,833 --> 00:46:51,541 你这在掐我 1020 00:46:51,666 --> 00:46:52,166 哎哟 1021 00:46:52,250 --> 00:46:52,833 一定得说 1022 00:46:52,875 --> 00:46:53,583 哎哟 1023 00:46:54,125 --> 00:46:54,541 不说 1024 00:46:55,125 --> 00:46:56,083 哎哟 1025 00:46:58,541 --> 00:46:59,375 我也会掐大腿 1026 00:46:59,791 --> 00:47:00,125 说疼 1027 00:47:00,625 --> 00:47:01,250 就说ldo 1028 00:47:01,666 --> 00:47:02,500 我使劲了儿啊 1029 00:47:03,000 --> 00:47:03,583 就说ldo 1030 00:47:04,125 --> 00:47:04,958 这是你腿吗? 1031 00:47:05,458 --> 00:47:06,041 说ldo 1032 00:47:07,625 --> 00:47:09,166 你怎么不喊疼啊! 1033 00:47:09,250 --> 00:47:10,166 你看都紫了 1034 00:47:10,916 --> 00:47:12,250 要么你掐死我 1035 00:47:13,000 --> 00:47:14,333 要么你娶我 1036 00:47:14,541 --> 00:47:15,958 我两样儿都舍不得 1037 00:47:16,041 --> 00:47:18,333 娶我有什么舍不得的呀 1038 00:47:18,416 --> 00:47:19,083 完颜 1039 00:47:19,791 --> 00:47:20,666 我警告你 1040 00:47:21,083 --> 00:47:22,166 不能随便嫁人 1041 00:47:22,541 --> 00:47:24,208 要嫁也不能嫁我这样儿的 1042 00:47:24,791 --> 00:47:25,791 你哪样儿的? 1043 00:47:25,875 --> 00:47:26,416 我… 1044 00:47:27,125 --> 00:47:28,208 还是个孩子 1045 00:47:29,583 --> 00:47:30,958 有你这么老的孩子吗? 1046 00:47:31,041 --> 00:47:32,416 有你这尺寸的孩子吗? 1047 00:47:32,500 --> 00:47:34,083 孩子不分老少 1048 00:47:34,250 --> 00:47:35,583 什么尺寸的都有 1049 00:47:35,875 --> 00:47:37,208 你就是不想负责任呗 1050 00:47:37,458 --> 00:47:37,958 没事儿 1051 00:47:38,750 --> 00:47:39,708 责任我负 1052 00:47:40,291 --> 00:47:42,666 婚我都向你求了不用你求 1053 00:47:43,250 --> 00:47:45,500 一切我都安排好了 1054 00:47:45,875 --> 00:47:48,750 我就是要你站在那儿说个I do! 1055 00:47:48,916 --> 00:47:49,125 好! 1056 00:47:49,875 --> 00:47:51,500 谁让咱俩这么多年的交情呢 1057 00:47:51,875 --> 00:47:52,708 我帮你个忙儿怎么了 1058 00:47:53,000 --> 00:47:54,666 咱也不是没干过坑蒙拐骗的事儿 1059 00:47:54,750 --> 00:47:56,583 你跟我结婚是坑蒙拐骗? 1060 00:47:56,666 --> 00:47:57,625 不是说要骗你妈吗? 1061 00:47:57,708 --> 00:47:58,791 谁说骗我妈啦? 1062 00:47:58,916 --> 00:48:00,333 那到底骗谁妈啊? 1063 00:48:00,416 --> 00:48:01,291 骗你妈! 1064 00:48:01,500 --> 00:48:03,708 我让你坑蒙拐骗 1065 00:48:30,250 --> 00:48:34,041 哈哈哈好像是一把枪啊 1066 00:48:34,208 --> 00:48:34,708 啊? 1067 00:48:35,291 --> 00:48:36,458 怎么玩着玩着 1068 00:48:37,041 --> 00:48:38,416 把枪拿出来了 1069 00:48:38,833 --> 00:48:39,708 会用吗? 1070 00:48:43,666 --> 00:48:45,041 你要是把我打死了 1071 00:48:45,708 --> 00:48:46,750 你自己也活不成了 1072 00:48:46,916 --> 00:48:48,708 我打死你我干吗还活呀 1073 00:48:48,791 --> 00:48:49,541 都死了 1074 00:48:50,500 --> 00:48:51,833 那不成了殉情了吗 1075 00:48:51,916 --> 00:48:53,041 我一枪把你给崩了 1076 00:48:53,916 --> 00:48:55,416 再把我白个儿给崩了 1077 00:48:56,041 --> 00:48:58,166 咱俩下了阴间还是这一出儿 1078 00:48:58,250 --> 00:49:00,958 你怎么还是这种完颜的脾气 1079 00:49:01,916 --> 00:49:03,208 这都到了民国了 1080 00:49:03,291 --> 00:49:04,708 到哪国我也这脾气! 1081 00:49:06,291 --> 00:49:07,583 我低三下四过吗? 1082 00:49:07,875 --> 00:49:08,166 没有 1083 00:49:08,250 --> 00:49:09,458 我曲意逢迎过吗? 1084 00:49:09,541 --> 00:49:10,208 更没有! 1085 00:49:10,291 --> 00:49:12,333 我自食其力当上了总统 1086 00:49:12,416 --> 00:49:13,958 我给完颇家丢过人吗? 1087 00:49:14,041 --> 00:49:14,875 不曾丢人 1088 00:49:15,333 --> 00:49:16,291 还长了脸 1089 00:49:16,375 --> 00:49:19,125 我就是想要有一个我喜欢的人真心待我 1090 00:49:19,208 --> 00:49:20,250 把我给娶了 1091 00:49:20,958 --> 00:49:22,458 你这算是拒绝我了? 1092 00:49:23,083 --> 00:49:24,291 不是拒绝您 1093 00:49:25,625 --> 00:49:27,625 我是心疼您 1094 00:49:29,208 --> 00:49:30,208 我真心的… 1095 00:49:31,041 --> 00:49:32,541 觉得您不是普通的人 1096 00:49:33,541 --> 00:49:34,708 我也真心觉得 1097 00:49:35,375 --> 00:49:36,500 不用让我娶您 1098 00:49:38,000 --> 00:49:39,083 您已经有了我 1099 00:49:39,708 --> 00:49:40,916 就不用再嫁给我 1100 00:49:47,208 --> 00:49:48,500 你真心不想娶我 1101 00:49:49,708 --> 00:49:51,500 我也真心不想活了 1102 00:49:52,166 --> 00:49:54,041 咱俩就真心对真心 1103 00:49:54,833 --> 00:49:55,250 啊… 1104 00:49:55,375 --> 00:49:57,000 但是真心不在那儿 1105 00:49:59,666 --> 00:50:01,291 真心在这儿 1106 00:50:04,083 --> 00:50:04,541 您… 1107 00:50:05,458 --> 00:50:06,541 打死我得了 1108 00:50:17,000 --> 00:50:18,041 万一有子弹呢? 1109 00:50:19,833 --> 00:50:21,000 那你就死了 1110 00:50:25,458 --> 00:50:25,791 走! 1111 00:50:33,250 --> 00:50:34,000 以后… 1112 00:50:34,666 --> 00:50:36,666 不许再用假枪来叮唬我! 1113 00:50:41,666 --> 00:50:42,958 真有子弹呐! 1114 00:50:47,541 --> 00:50:49,625 上辈子 1115 00:50:51,166 --> 00:50:54,083 我肯定是欠你的 1116 00:50:56,875 --> 00:50:58,833 要不然为什么 1117 00:50:59,875 --> 00:51:01,833 你对我这么坏 1118 00:51:03,458 --> 00:51:07,375 我还那么喜欢你 1119 00:51:07,916 --> 00:51:09,083 上辈子 1120 00:51:09,916 --> 00:51:10,958 咱们俩… 1121 00:51:12,083 --> 00:51:14,750 咱们俩是俩眼珠子 1122 00:51:15,333 --> 00:51:17,166 长在一个人儿的脸上 1123 00:51:18,041 --> 00:51:20,041 那就是天生的一对儿 1124 00:51:22,166 --> 00:51:23,083 可是… 1125 00:51:23,416 --> 00:51:25,250 谁也没看见过谁 1126 00:51:28,708 --> 00:51:31,708 那你是左眼 1127 00:51:31,750 --> 00:51:34,083 还是我是左眼? 1128 00:51:34,833 --> 00:51:35,708 您挑 1129 00:51:36,583 --> 00:51:38,875 您是左眼我就当右眼 1130 00:51:40,833 --> 00:51:42,666 那我是右眼 1131 00:51:43,083 --> 00:51:44,625 我就当左眼 1132 00:51:47,708 --> 00:51:48,708 可是… 1133 00:51:49,583 --> 00:51:51,916 一辈子谁也没见过谁 1134 00:51:52,416 --> 00:51:53,583 怪可怜的 1135 00:51:57,416 --> 00:51:59,125 那对眼儿呢? 1136 00:52:04,583 --> 00:52:07,666 那您得长一多矮的鼻梁子 1137 00:52:07,708 --> 00:52:10,625 才能让您的左眼看见您的右眼 1138 00:52:15,625 --> 00:52:16,333 不行 1139 00:52:17,166 --> 00:52:19,125 一辈子就当一对儿眼睛 1140 00:52:19,208 --> 00:52:20,791 谁也看不着谁 1141 00:52:21,083 --> 00:52:22,500 太可怜了! 1142 00:52:23,291 --> 00:52:25,041 我有一个好办法 1143 00:52:26,125 --> 00:52:28,500 你可以把我眼珠子抠出萨 1144 00:52:30,875 --> 00:52:31,750 看见你的眼睛 1145 00:52:33,916 --> 00:52:34,458 不行 1146 00:52:34,541 --> 00:52:35,791 哦那当什么呢 1147 00:52:35,875 --> 00:52:37,166 蜗牛! 1148 00:52:37,875 --> 00:52:38,208 蜗牛? 1149 00:52:38,291 --> 00:52:39,625 蜗牛的眼睛! 1150 00:52:39,708 --> 00:52:41,458 蜗牛的眼睛这么高 1151 00:52:41,750 --> 00:52:42,333 能伸得特别远! 1152 00:52:42,416 --> 00:52:43,666 这么高吗? 1153 00:52:46,708 --> 00:52:48,041 能看见你的大腿 1154 00:52:49,541 --> 00:52:51,125 能看见我后背 1155 00:52:51,291 --> 00:52:53,666 也能看见你后脑勺儿 1156 00:52:54,000 --> 00:52:55,708 要不然咱俩当俩海浪 1157 00:52:56,125 --> 00:52:56,958 海浪? 1158 00:52:57,375 --> 00:52:59,958 你在前边走我在后边追 1159 00:53:02,166 --> 00:53:03,458 我就不信追不上 1160 00:53:03,666 --> 00:53:04,333 开船! 1161 00:53:04,375 --> 00:53:05,208 I do! 1162 00:53:05,666 --> 00:53:07,208 咱现在去哪儿啊? 1163 00:53:07,375 --> 00:53:09,041 您说去哪儿咱就去哪儿! 1164 00:53:09,125 --> 00:53:10,583 咱哪儿都不去I 1165 00:53:10,666 --> 00:53:11,375 I do! 1166 00:53:11,541 --> 00:53:13,250 咱们哪儿都不去! 1167 00:53:13,541 --> 00:53:15,916 哪儿都不去怎么还开那么快呀? 1168 00:53:16,000 --> 00:53:18,166 只有快才能哪儿都不去呀 1169 00:53:18,291 --> 00:53:19,375 那我要回家 1170 00:53:19,458 --> 00:53:20,416 I do! 1171 00:53:21,625 --> 00:53:23,291 家到喽! 1172 00:53:23,666 --> 00:53:24,791 哪儿是家啊? 1173 00:53:24,875 --> 00:53:26,083 这儿就是家 1174 00:53:26,500 --> 00:53:28,708 您在”哪儿哪儿就是家 1175 00:53:28,833 --> 00:53:30,416 您就是家! 1176 00:53:31,083 --> 00:53:31,541 开灯 1177 00:53:31,625 --> 00:53:32,083 I do! 1178 00:53:32,375 --> 00:53:34,333 亮、亮、亮! 1179 00:53:36,416 --> 00:53:37,958 太亮啦 1180 00:53:38,166 --> 00:53:39,416 我给您关上几个 1181 00:53:39,541 --> 00:53:40,125 瞄准 1182 00:53:40,541 --> 00:53:41,000 走 1183 00:53:44,000 --> 00:53:45,083 您看这边儿 1184 00:53:50,833 --> 00:53:52,291 您好像是在唱歌儿? 1185 00:53:53,791 --> 00:53:56,291 我把那个最亮的灯给你打下来 1186 00:53:59,250 --> 00:54:00,000 别别 1187 00:54:00,291 --> 00:54:02,000 别打你该吓着我朋友了 1188 00:54:02,416 --> 00:54:03,583 这儿有你的朋友吗? 1189 00:54:03,875 --> 00:54:04,750 兔子啊 1190 00:54:04,916 --> 00:54:06,416 不跟那儿捣药呢吗 1191 00:54:06,458 --> 00:54:08,916 啊我看见了耳朵没看见兔子 1192 00:54:09,583 --> 00:54:12,250 看见耳朵了兔子就不远了 1193 00:54:12,375 --> 00:54:14,500 可是您这兔子太大啦 1194 00:54:14,750 --> 00:54:16,791 难怪把这月亮都挡得这么黑 1195 00:54:16,875 --> 00:54:18,541 那都是药啊 1196 00:54:18,708 --> 00:54:19,916 咱们上去把他吃喽! 1197 00:54:20,000 --> 00:54:21,083 把兔子吃了? 1198 00:54:21,166 --> 00:54:22,583 把药吃干净 1199 00:54:22,708 --> 00:54:26,166 让你的月亮白天也能这么亮 1200 00:54:26,708 --> 00:54:28,208 Let's go! 1201 00:54:29,791 --> 00:54:31,166 那兔子捣的什么药? 1202 00:54:31,250 --> 00:54:32,333 长生不老药 1203 00:54:34,125 --> 00:54:35,500 太好了i走! 1204 00:54:36,333 --> 00:54:38,250 解放兔子! 1205 00:54:39,875 --> 00:54:41,750 咱们月亮上的家还有什么人呐? 1206 00:54:41,791 --> 00:54:43,041 还有吴刚呢 1207 00:54:43,333 --> 00:54:44,416 吴刚是姐夫吧? 1208 00:54:45,125 --> 00:54:46,666 不是姐夫不是姐夫 1209 00:54:46,750 --> 00:54:47,541 那就让他回家 1210 00:54:47,625 --> 00:54:48,166 好! 1211 00:54:48,166 --> 00:54:49,416 月亮上就剩咱们四个 1212 00:54:49,791 --> 00:54:51,250 嫦娥、兔姐、你、我 1213 00:54:51,916 --> 00:54:53,208 嗯!那你娶我 1214 00:54:53,333 --> 00:54:53,791 都娶! 1215 00:54:54,041 --> 00:54:55,333 不行只娶我一个 1216 00:54:55,458 --> 00:54:56,041 I do! 1217 00:55:47,250 --> 00:55:50,000 千万不能抽鸦片呐 1218 00:55:50,083 --> 00:55:52,791 千万不能抽大烟 1219 00:55:53,291 --> 00:55:55,541 好好儿的一个完颜 1220 00:55:56,041 --> 00:55:57,875 就这么死了 1221 00:55:58,958 --> 00:56:03,375 要是能说句爱你你就不死了 1222 00:56:04,041 --> 00:56:06,625 我为什么不早说呢? 1223 00:56:08,416 --> 00:56:10,833 我可怎么办呢? 1224 00:56:14,916 --> 00:56:16,833 我还是先跑了吧 1225 00:56:17,333 --> 00:56:20,708 我实在是说不清楚眼前这个事情啊 1226 00:56:21,250 --> 00:56:23,250 我得找朋友给我帮忙 1227 00:56:23,583 --> 00:56:25,125 可是我找谁呢? 1228 00:56:25,541 --> 00:56:27,041 我找武六去吧 1229 00:56:27,500 --> 00:56:29,625 武六她爸是大帅呀 1230 00:56:30,000 --> 00:56:33,416 武六她妈毕竟是我的老师啊 1231 00:56:35,750 --> 00:56:36,208 谁呀? 1232 00:56:36,375 --> 00:56:37,041 马走日! 1233 00:56:37,208 --> 00:56:37,791 干什么的? 1234 00:56:38,208 --> 00:56:38,541 我… 1235 00:56:38,791 --> 00:56:39,125 我 1236 00:56:40,083 --> 00:56:40,958 我我找人 1237 00:56:41,083 --> 00:56:41,541 找谁? 1238 00:56:41,958 --> 00:56:42,791 武六武七! 1239 00:56:43,000 --> 00:56:44,083 六还是七? 1240 00:56:44,250 --> 00:56:45,750 -当然是六哇!-立正!敬礼! 1241 00:56:46,333 --> 00:56:48,416 你找武六武六认得你吗? 1242 00:56:48,458 --> 00:56:49,625 认识我 1243 00:56:49,750 --> 00:56:52,041 看你这个打扮我还以为是告状的呢 1244 00:56:52,375 --> 00:56:53,041 这边儿请! 1245 00:56:58,625 --> 00:56:59,000 坐! 1246 00:56:59,166 --> 00:56:59,458 好 1247 00:57:04,125 --> 00:57:04,750 看报纸! 1248 00:57:12,291 --> 00:57:15,333 马走日先生武六小姐有请! 1249 00:57:33,083 --> 00:57:34,208 在海边拍日落 1250 00:57:34,625 --> 00:57:35,833 去泰山拍日出 1251 00:57:36,333 --> 00:57:38,041 那正好啊我能帮上你的忙啊 1252 00:57:38,500 --> 00:57:39,833 我在法国留学的时候 1253 00:57:39,958 --> 00:57:41,000 弄了不少的电影 1254 00:57:41,333 --> 00:57:43,041 什么《火车进站》啦: 1255 00:57:43,708 --> 00:57:44,625 《水浇园丁》啊! 1256 00:57:44,666 --> 00:57:45,791 说几句法语听听 1257 00:57:45,916 --> 00:57:48,291 好!很好!奶酪! (法语) 1258 00:57:48,333 --> 00:57:49,041 哈哈哈… 1259 00:57:49,250 --> 00:57:52,250 小时候儿在香山四锐营高小读书的时候 1260 00:57:52,291 --> 00:57:54,166 老师逼着我们得说六门儿外语 1261 00:57:54,250 --> 00:57:55,500 我妈在那教过书! 1262 00:57:55,875 --> 00:57:57,583 敢问伯母贵姓啊? 1263 00:57:57,625 --> 00:57:58,125 姓葷 1264 00:57:58,500 --> 00:58:00,625 不是我覃赛男覃老师吧! 1265 00:58:01,291 --> 00:58:03,791 哎呀你妈年轻时候儿可太漂亮了 1266 00:58:04,541 --> 00:58:08,000 你妈可是我们所有男生的梦中情人儿 1267 00:58:08,250 --> 00:58:11,125 在很多方面给了我启蒙的老师 1268 00:58:11,541 --> 00:58:12,333 就是你妈 1269 00:58:12,541 --> 00:58:14,791 说说你去法国都干什么了 1270 00:58:15,791 --> 00:58:17,083 我喜欢上一个姑娘 1271 00:58:17,791 --> 00:58:20,416 就一直跟着她去了她的家乡 1272 00:58:21,583 --> 00:58:23,791 她家乡有一个湖 1273 00:58:24,458 --> 00:58:25,541 Hq罗梦湖 1274 00:58:25,625 --> 00:58:29,458 夏天我总是跟着她在湖边散步 1275 00:58:31,166 --> 00:58:31,750 看日落 1276 00:58:32,208 --> 00:58:33,125 看日出 1277 00:58:33,458 --> 00:58:34,041 后来呢? 1278 00:58:35,041 --> 00:58:35,666 打仗了! 1279 00:58:36,458 --> 00:58:37,291 我就上了战场 1280 00:58:37,875 --> 00:58:38,833 我跟她说 1281 00:58:39,166 --> 00:58:40,333 你在湖边儿上等我 1282 00:58:40,708 --> 00:58:42,208 就算我万一回不来 1283 00:58:42,833 --> 00:58:44,708 我的灵魂也会穿过大山 1284 00:58:45,208 --> 00:58:46,416 穿过森林 1285 00:58:46,875 --> 00:58:48,083 穿过大海 1286 00:58:48,333 --> 00:58:49,500 到湖边儿去找你 1287 00:58:50,041 --> 00:58:52,500 这不是人家苏格兰传说码? 1288 00:58:53,541 --> 00:58:54,083 这么巧? 1289 00:58:54,166 --> 00:58:55,375 他们也有这个传说? 1290 00:58:55,458 --> 00:58:56,333 而且 1291 00:58:56,583 --> 00:58:58,000 传说里的像… 1292 00:58:58,125 --> 00:58:59,166 已经死了 1293 00:58:59,250 --> 00:59:01,083 哦我是差点儿死了 1294 00:59:01,583 --> 00:59:02,625 一颗炮弹过来 1295 00:59:03,416 --> 00:59:03,958 就炸了 1296 00:59:04,958 --> 00:59:06,416 哎…捡了条命 1297 00:59:06,458 --> 00:59:07,125 可是… 1298 00:59:07,625 --> 00:59:08,333 腿没了 1299 00:59:08,875 --> 00:59:09,666 腿没了吗? 1300 00:59:10,416 --> 00:59:12,250 大夫好啊给我接了条假腿 1301 00:59:12,291 --> 00:59:12,750 你看 1302 00:59:13,250 --> 00:59:13,958 我要不说 1303 00:59:14,208 --> 00:59:15,375 你都看不出来哪个是假的 1304 00:59:16,291 --> 00:59:17,291 确实看不出来 1305 00:59:17,916 --> 00:59:20,875 哎哟你踢我那条好腿啦l 1306 00:59:22,250 --> 00:59:22,833 啊! 1307 00:59:25,000 --> 00:59:26,416 这条腿更疼! 1308 00:59:27,708 --> 00:59:30,541 腿被武六踢断了 1309 00:59:31,083 --> 00:59:34,125 两条腿都被她踢断了 1310 00:59:34,541 --> 00:59:39,083 武六就是容不得别人在她面前吹牛撒谎 1311 00:59:39,458 --> 00:59:42,333 我也只能眼巴巴地看着她们 1312 00:59:42,500 --> 00:59:44,833 上泰山拍电影儿去了 1313 00:59:45,958 --> 00:59:49,125 要是那回我的腿不被踢断 1314 00:59:49,458 --> 00:59:51,958 那该多好哇 1315 01:00:02,833 --> 01:00:03,250 哎 1316 01:00:04,333 --> 01:00:05,375 谁呢我以为 1317 01:00:05,583 --> 01:00:06,541 好久不见 1318 01:00:06,916 --> 01:00:08,666 马先生看着有点儿老啊! 1319 01:00:09,166 --> 01:00:09,916 老吗? 1320 01:00:09,958 --> 01:00:10,875 老! 1321 01:00:13,291 --> 01:00:15,875 还戴着眼镜像个教书先生 1322 01:00:15,916 --> 01:00:18,375 眼镜是借来的为了掩人耳目 1323 01:00:18,541 --> 01:00:19,625 你犯什么罪啦? 1324 01:00:20,166 --> 01:00:22,083 今天来找我帮什么忙? 1325 01:00:24,208 --> 01:00:26,500 我还真有点事想麻烦… 1326 01:00:27,166 --> 01:00:28,166 麻烦我 1327 01:00:28,791 --> 01:00:30,250 还是麻烦你覃老师呀? 1328 01:00:30,875 --> 01:00:31,833 我覃老师在吗? 1329 01:00:32,416 --> 01:00:33,041 小强! 1330 01:00:33,166 --> 01:00:33,541 有! 1331 01:00:34,250 --> 01:00:36,666 把马先生带去见他覃老师 1332 01:00:37,125 --> 01:00:37,666 是! 1333 01:00:38,666 --> 01:00:40,291 你这好像是个机器人吧? 1334 01:00:41,416 --> 01:00:43,041 咱们这时代就有机器人了? 1335 01:00:43,500 --> 01:00:44,583 还没凋好呢 1336 01:00:46,541 --> 01:00:50,791 噢!命运像月亮般变幻无常(拉丁文) 1337 01:00:50,875 --> 01:00:52,708 真是我敬爱的覃老师吗? 1338 01:00:52,875 --> 01:00:54,625 四锐营三旗高小的吧 1339 01:00:54,666 --> 01:00:55,791 您认出我来了 1340 01:00:55,875 --> 01:00:59,416 四锐营三旗高小叫我覃老师 1341 01:00:59,541 --> 01:01:01,916 仪静女中叫我覃先生 1342 01:01:02,375 --> 01:01:04,875 京北师就叫我覃校长 1343 01:01:05,583 --> 01:01:06,541 听这称呼 1344 01:01:06,666 --> 01:01:08,708 我就知道你是哪个学校的 1345 01:01:09,166 --> 01:01:10,375 但是你这人 1346 01:01:10,916 --> 01:01:12,375 我可真没认出来 1347 01:01:12,458 --> 01:01:13,291 马走日啊! 1348 01:01:13,375 --> 01:01:14,916 四锐营有姓马的吗? 1349 01:01:15,000 --> 01:01:16,500 老姓儿默尔济吉特 1350 01:01:16,750 --> 01:01:18,291 我就坐在最后一排 1351 01:01:18,375 --> 01:01:20,625 最后一排是一个胖黑丫头 1352 01:01:20,708 --> 01:01:21,708 胖黑丫头旁边那个 1353 01:01:21,833 --> 01:01:22,916 旁边是个校工 1354 01:01:23,000 --> 01:01:25,250 我是蹲过几年班啊覃老师 1355 01:01:25,500 --> 01:01:27,250 您必是把我当校工了 1356 01:01:27,333 --> 01:01:29,458 不对那校工是个独眼儿龙 1357 01:01:30,166 --> 01:01:32,541 没关系我能为你做些什么? 1358 01:01:32,666 --> 01:01:34,125 我敬爱的覃老师哎 1359 01:01:34,916 --> 01:01:36,375 您的学生马走日给您… 1360 01:01:36,416 --> 01:01:38,333 怎么还我敬爱的敬爱的啊 1361 01:01:38,833 --> 01:01:40,500 你到底跟我妈说没说呀? 1362 01:01:40,583 --> 01:01:41,541 我这不正要说呢吗! 1363 01:01:41,666 --> 01:01:43,958 妈他说您是他的情人 1364 01:01:44,000 --> 01:01:44,583 嗯?哎! 1365 01:01:44,708 --> 01:01:45,416 梦中的 1366 01:01:45,750 --> 01:01:47,583 他说您是他的启蒙老师 1367 01:01:48,041 --> 01:01:48,833 那方面的 1368 01:01:48,875 --> 01:01:51,250 我…我什么时候儿跟你这么样说过话呀! 1369 01:01:51,333 --> 01:01:52,416 火车上你忘了? 1370 01:01:53,125 --> 01:01:55,041 你真的这么说的? 1371 01:01:55,083 --> 01:01:56,375 覃老师我对不起您 1372 01:01:56,458 --> 01:01:59,833 哎呀不用这么不好意思 1373 01:01:59,916 --> 01:02:03,833 我学生当中说真话的人不多 1374 01:02:04,375 --> 01:02:06,458 你是头一个 1375 01:02:06,625 --> 01:02:07,958 你看小脸儿都红了 1376 01:02:08,125 --> 01:02:11,625 哎呀!大事不好了! 1377 01:02:11,708 --> 01:02:12,541 你好好说话 1378 01:02:12,708 --> 01:02:14,375 老狗和小狗咬起来了 1379 01:02:14,666 --> 01:02:16,250 要出人命啦! 1380 01:02:16,291 --> 01:02:17,583 狗打架怎么出人命啊? 1381 01:02:17,875 --> 01:02:18,458 她呀 1382 01:02:18,750 --> 01:02:20,416 管她丈夫叫老狗 1383 01:02:20,541 --> 01:02:22,291 管她儿子叫小狗 1384 01:02:22,458 --> 01:02:23,125 女婿? 1385 01:02:23,333 --> 01:02:24,458 不曾!不曾! 1386 01:02:24,708 --> 01:02:25,666 怎么拉着手儿呢? 1387 01:02:25,833 --> 01:02:26,541 我学生 1388 01:02:26,791 --> 01:02:28,458 你赶紧弄饭去吧啊 1389 01:02:28,541 --> 01:02:29,666 把那胡子摘了 1390 01:02:29,750 --> 01:02:33,000 我怎么老觉得你的嘴就长着耳朵底下似的 1391 01:02:33,083 --> 01:02:33,750 遵命! 1392 01:02:34,208 --> 01:02:35,541 你跟厨房讲一声 1393 01:02:35,625 --> 01:02:37,083 今天晚上有客人来的 1394 01:02:37,250 --> 01:02:38,708 好的太太那么军歌还唱吗? 1395 01:02:38,750 --> 01:02:40,041 唱啊为什么不唱啊? 1396 01:02:41,875 --> 01:02:42,791 想方便一下? 1397 01:02:42,916 --> 01:02:43,333 嗯 1398 01:02:43,708 --> 01:02:45,416 这边儿有这边儿有 1399 01:02:45,791 --> 01:02:47,541 这边儿还有后头也有 1400 01:02:48,208 --> 01:02:50,791 条条大路都能通茅房 1401 01:02:52,416 --> 01:02:53,291 我陪侬去好不好? 1402 01:02:53,541 --> 01:02:54,791 侬说什么呢 1403 01:02:54,875 --> 01:02:55,333 我自己能去 1404 01:02:55,916 --> 01:02:56,875 能伐着吗/ 1405 01:02:57,208 --> 01:02:57,666 能 1406 01:02:57,875 --> 01:02:59,541 你小时候就是这个毛病! 1407 01:03:17,291 --> 01:03:18,625 马走日马走日 1408 01:03:18,916 --> 01:03:21,125 现在是你求人救命的时候 1409 01:03:21,500 --> 01:03:22,833 你怎么张不开D啊 1410 01:03:23,250 --> 01:03:24,666 你跟我说马走日 1411 01:03:25,500 --> 01:03:26,583 你怕丢人吗? 1412 01:03:26,833 --> 01:03:28,500 不丢人不丢人 1413 01:03:30,250 --> 01:03:30,750 谁?! 1414 01:03:30,791 --> 01:03:32,333 飞田我呀 1415 01:03:32,625 --> 01:03:33,208 哎? 1416 01:03:33,250 --> 01:03:34,375 走日救我 1417 01:03:34,458 --> 01:03:35,458 你真的在这儿啊! 1418 01:03:35,750 --> 01:03:36,541 这是怎么回事儿? 1419 01:03:36,583 --> 01:03:38,291 别拉别拉这是马嚼子 1420 01:03:38,416 --> 01:03:39,125 嚼子? 1421 01:03:39,333 --> 01:03:40,708 背上还有马鞍子呢 1422 01:03:40,833 --> 01:03:41,958 谁干的这是? 1423 01:03:42,041 --> 01:03:43,166 武大帅呗 1424 01:03:43,291 --> 01:03:43,916 为什么呀? 1425 01:03:44,041 --> 01:03:45,625 他说我不配做人 1426 01:03:45,666 --> 01:03:47,250 让我逆向进化 1427 01:03:47,333 --> 01:03:49,541 让我重新变回猴儿去 1428 01:03:49,666 --> 01:03:50,541 变猴儿? 1429 01:03:50,791 --> 01:03:52,083 关马棚里干什么呀? 1430 01:03:52,166 --> 01:03:54,708 说是先从马这儿过渡一下 1431 01:03:55,125 --> 01:03:57,208 你这是把人家给得罪狠啦! 1432 01:03:57,791 --> 01:03:59,208 你到底干什么了你啊! 1433 01:03:59,291 --> 01:04:02,291 武七带我要去让他爸逮着了 1434 01:04:02,458 --> 01:04:03,375 嫖去了吧! 1435 01:04:03,416 --> 01:04:05,166 还能干吗呀 1436 01:04:05,250 --> 01:04:07,125 按说嫖不至于这么整你呀 1437 01:04:07,166 --> 01:04:08,750 他爸的人他爸的地儿 1438 01:04:08,958 --> 01:04:09,958 就怕是这个 1439 01:04:10,000 --> 01:04:11,375 你看见那闹钟了吗? 1440 01:04:11,541 --> 01:04:13,916 十二点你要不把我救出去 1441 01:04:14,333 --> 01:04:16,708 他说就把那俩野马放进来! 1442 01:04:16,958 --> 01:04:18,875 啊?!野马那什么您! 1443 01:04:19,416 --> 01:04:21,166 那你会很受委屈的! 1444 01:04:21,250 --> 01:04:24,500 我就是不愿意受这委屈! 1445 01:04:25,541 --> 01:04:27,083 我给你解开扣儿把你放跑了吧 1446 01:04:27,125 --> 01:04:27,833 哎哎千万别! 1447 01:04:27,916 --> 01:04:30,125 放了我也跑不了他非把我毙了 1448 01:04:30,291 --> 01:04:30,750 你呀 1449 01:04:30,791 --> 01:04:31,166 啊? 1450 01:04:31,208 --> 01:04:32,541 你找武六说说情 1451 01:04:32,625 --> 01:04:34,291 让武六跟他爸说说情 1452 01:04:34,375 --> 01:04:35,208 救救老哥 1453 01:04:35,666 --> 01:04:36,875 用用美男计! 1454 01:04:38,000 --> 01:04:39,083 你帮我看看几点了 1455 01:04:40,000 --> 01:04:41,125 十一点三十七 1456 01:04:41,208 --> 01:04:42,125 还有二十三分钟 1457 01:04:42,458 --> 01:04:44,041 那还来得及救你吗? 1458 01:04:44,125 --> 01:04:45,916 来得及来不及就看你啦! 1459 01:04:46,208 --> 01:04:48,041 起立唱! (日语) 1460 01:04:48,166 --> 01:04:50,125 我们知道就是知道 1461 01:04:50,166 --> 01:04:52,083 绝对不能装 1462 01:04:52,416 --> 01:04:53,958 不能装 1463 01:04:54,250 --> 01:04:55,625 不能装! 1464 01:04:55,666 --> 01:04:57,625 我分了不知道就不知道 1465 01:04:57,666 --> 01:04:59,500 也不能装 1466 01:04:59,625 --> 01:05:01,125 不能装 1467 01:05:01,458 --> 01:05:02,666 不能装! 1468 01:05:02,833 --> 01:05:04,541 我们知道就是知道 1469 01:05:04,666 --> 01:05:06,458 绝对不能装 1470 01:05:06,875 --> 01:05:08,375 不能装 1471 01:05:08,625 --> 01:05:09,958 不能装! 1472 01:05:10,041 --> 01:05:11,916 我们不知道就不知道 1473 01:05:12,041 --> 01:05:13,791 也不能装 1474 01:05:13,958 --> 01:05:15,250 不能装 1475 01:05:15,375 --> 01:05:17,125 绝对不能装! 1476 01:05:17,458 --> 01:05:19,541 绝对不能装! 1477 01:05:20,000 --> 01:05:21,083 什么不能装? 1478 01:05:21,541 --> 01:05:22,958 统统不能装! 1479 01:05:23,250 --> 01:05:23,750 坐下! 1480 01:05:23,791 --> 01:05:25,500 坐1日语) 1481 01:05:26,125 --> 01:05:27,500 咦这是谁? 1482 01:05:28,125 --> 01:05:28,708 这是我 1483 01:05:28,791 --> 01:05:29,541 你是我儿? 1484 01:05:29,666 --> 01:05:30,583 哪个是你娘? 1485 01:05:30,666 --> 01:05:31,375 俺覃老师 1486 01:05:31,583 --> 01:05:32,666 不是女婿吗? 1487 01:05:32,750 --> 01:05:34,875 哎呀这是我原来一个学生 1488 01:05:35,000 --> 01:05:36,208 信奉什么… 1489 01:05:36,291 --> 01:05:38,333 一日为师终生为母 1490 01:05:40,375 --> 01:05:41,000 来人! 1491 01:05:41,125 --> 01:05:42,833 把那两个混蛋带上来! 1492 01:05:58,708 --> 01:05:59,458 别哭啦! 1493 01:06:01,583 --> 01:06:02,500 哭也别出声儿 1494 01:06:02,708 --> 01:06:05,041 你们知道老七是什么问题吗? 1495 01:06:05,625 --> 01:06:07,000 见着钱就想花 1496 01:06:07,583 --> 01:06:08,791 见着女人就想嫖 1497 01:06:09,333 --> 01:06:09,791 说! 1498 01:06:10,250 --> 01:06:10,958 军费呐! 1499 01:06:11,333 --> 01:06:11,958 嫖了! 1500 01:06:13,583 --> 01:06:17,583 啊…武七啊 1501 01:06:17,958 --> 01:06:19,375 妈别哭啦! 1502 01:06:19,458 --> 01:06:20,291 我没死! 1503 01:06:20,375 --> 01:06:22,375 那是我要开军校的钱 1504 01:06:23,083 --> 01:06:24,708 美国有个西点 1505 01:06:25,583 --> 01:06:28,125 我就是要在中国办个东点! 1506 01:06:28,208 --> 01:06:30,291 你是想娶全世界的小老婆 1507 01:06:30,708 --> 01:06:32,000 那也得身体好 1508 01:06:32,625 --> 01:06:34,041 我就是要让中国的军人 1509 01:06:34,833 --> 01:06:35,375 结实! 1510 01:06:36,125 --> 01:06:36,750 有劲儿! 1511 01:06:37,208 --> 01:06:38,958 可是这两个混蛋… 1512 01:06:39,250 --> 01:06:40,416 结果这两个混蛋… 1513 01:06:41,166 --> 01:06:43,125 把该花在男人身上的钱 1514 01:06:43,708 --> 01:06:45,250 都花在了女人身上 1515 01:06:45,958 --> 01:06:46,291 啊对! 1516 01:06:47,083 --> 01:06:47,791 你说得对呀! 1517 01:06:48,083 --> 01:06:48,541 大帅 1518 01:06:49,583 --> 01:06:50,000 您… 1519 01:06:51,000 --> 01:06:52,000 高瞻远瞩 1520 01:06:53,208 --> 01:06:54,041 马某人我 1521 01:06:54,291 --> 01:06:55,541 要是年轻几岁 1522 01:06:55,916 --> 01:06:58,458 一定会跟着您征战南北 1523 01:06:58,958 --> 01:06:59,791 别的大帅 1524 01:07:00,000 --> 01:07:02,500 都把钱花在了飞机坦克上 1525 01:07:03,000 --> 01:07:05,625 可是您却一下子抓住了人 1526 01:07:06,000 --> 01:07:08,083 大帅您应该生气 1527 01:07:08,833 --> 01:07:09,500 他们两个… 1528 01:07:10,208 --> 01:07:11,416 应该被枪毙 1529 01:07:12,250 --> 01:07:13,500 把马给我牵上来 1530 01:07:15,291 --> 01:07:16,041 先马办 1531 01:07:16,750 --> 01:07:17,583 后法办! 1532 01:07:17,708 --> 01:07:18,375 且慢! 1533 01:07:18,583 --> 01:07:19,041 大帅! 1534 01:07:19,541 --> 01:07:22,750 要想培养中国的军人个个有劲儿 1535 01:07:23,208 --> 01:07:24,750 不一定都靠钱 1536 01:07:25,333 --> 01:07:26,541 钱都花光了 1537 01:07:26,750 --> 01:07:27,458 还能昨办? 1538 01:07:27,708 --> 01:07:28,291 赛先生 1539 01:07:28,416 --> 01:07:29,083 科学! 1540 01:07:29,375 --> 01:07:30,708 科学是造大炮的 1541 01:07:31,083 --> 01:07:32,041 又不是造人的 1542 01:07:32,250 --> 01:07:34,208 科学能够造大炮 1543 01:07:34,541 --> 01:07:36,041 也能够造人的身体! 1544 01:07:36,333 --> 01:07:37,000 您要是不信 1545 01:07:37,291 --> 01:07:38,625 我现在就给您证明 1546 01:07:39,083 --> 01:07:40,708 您的手能摸着地吗? 1547 01:07:41,083 --> 01:07:42,500 我闲得没事儿摸什么地 1548 01:07:42,833 --> 01:07:43,375 不摸 1549 01:07:43,666 --> 01:07:44,625 我知道够不着 1550 01:07:44,750 --> 01:07:45,958 只要您跟着我学 1551 01:07:46,541 --> 01:07:48,958 马上就能立竿见影 1552 01:07:49,041 --> 01:07:50,541 嘿!你要是耍我 1553 01:07:51,000 --> 01:07:52,958 你的下场就像他们一样 1554 01:07:53,458 --> 01:07:54,708 马力法办枪毙! 1555 01:07:54,708 --> 01:07:55,916 耍不你想个别的办法 1556 01:07:55,916 --> 01:07:56,625 -别!-不必! 1557 01:07:56,791 --> 01:07:57,375 就这个! 1558 01:07:57,458 --> 01:07:58,250 就这个办法! 1559 01:07:58,333 --> 01:07:58,541 起立! 1560 01:07:58,750 --> 01:07:59,083 好 1561 01:07:59,208 --> 01:07:59,458 来 1562 01:07:59,541 --> 01:08:00,208 站起来都站起来都来做(日语) 1563 01:08:00,291 --> 01:08:01,166 俺要看看 1564 01:08:01,250 --> 01:08:01,958 都站起来吗? 1565 01:08:02,041 --> 01:08:02,416 都来 1566 01:08:02,625 --> 01:08:03,416 都想摸着地? 1567 01:08:03,541 --> 01:08:04,000 当然! 1568 01:08:04,375 --> 01:08:04,666 好! 1569 01:08:05,083 --> 01:08:06,666 您能把手举到这儿吗? 1570 01:08:07,291 --> 01:08:08,666 俩腿站直 1571 01:08:08,875 --> 01:08:09,458 然后 1572 01:08:09,791 --> 01:08:11,125 手慢慢放下 1573 01:08:12,041 --> 01:08:13,291 您能摸到地吗? 1574 01:08:13,375 --> 01:08:13,916 摸不着 1575 01:08:14,291 --> 01:08:15,875 大家都摸不着吗? 1576 01:08:16,458 --> 01:08:17,041 不可能的 1577 01:08:17,125 --> 01:08:17,750 那就对了 1578 01:08:17,875 --> 01:08:18,250 嗯? 1579 01:08:18,375 --> 01:08:19,708 现在跟着我学 1580 01:08:20,416 --> 01:08:20,791 一 1581 01:08:21,625 --> 01:08:22,333 这有什么! 1582 01:08:22,958 --> 01:08:24,625 您用不着踢着腿 1583 01:08:25,375 --> 01:08:27,541 只需要这样和这样 1584 01:08:28,000 --> 01:08:28,583 二十次 1585 01:08:28,666 --> 01:08:29,125 开始! 1日语) 1586 01:08:29,958 --> 01:08:30,041 二 1587 01:08:30,041 --> 01:08:30,708 二 1588 01:08:30,958 --> 01:08:31,666 三 1589 01:08:32,000 --> 01:08:32,791 四 1590 01:08:32,875 --> 01:08:33,500 七 1591 01:08:33,875 --> 01:08:34,500 八 1592 01:08:34,791 --> 01:08:35,416 九 1593 01:08:35,625 --> 01:08:36,333 十 1594 01:08:36,583 --> 01:08:37,291 十三 1595 01:08:37,500 --> 01:08:38,083 十四 1596 01:08:38,291 --> 01:08:39,041 十七 1597 01:08:39,208 --> 01:08:39,916 十八 1598 01:08:40,250 --> 01:08:40,916 十九 1599 01:08:41,041 --> 01:08:41,833 二十! 1600 01:08:41,916 --> 01:08:43,291 关键的时候儿来啦! 1601 01:08:43,666 --> 01:08:44,208 举高 1602 01:08:44,625 --> 01:08:46,083 您摸到了太阳 1603 01:08:46,833 --> 01:08:48,000 摸到了月亮 1604 01:08:48,166 --> 01:08:49,708 摸到了星辰 1605 01:08:49,958 --> 01:08:51,458 摸到了大海 1606 01:08:51,666 --> 01:08:53,166 摸进大海! 1607 01:08:54,041 --> 01:08:54,958 这怎么回事儿? 1608 01:08:55,041 --> 01:08:56,000 筋长一寸 1609 01:08:56,250 --> 01:08:57,208 多活十年! 1610 01:08:57,291 --> 01:08:59,250 哎听俺说从今以后 1611 01:08:59,416 --> 01:09:00,875 饭前唱军歌儿 1612 01:09:00,958 --> 01:09:01,958 饭后就模脚 1613 01:09:02,041 --> 01:09:02,500 大帅 1614 01:09:02,583 --> 01:09:02,916 啊? 1615 01:09:03,000 --> 01:09:04,208 您不必再摸脚了 1616 01:09:04,291 --> 01:09:04,833 摸什么? 1617 01:09:04,916 --> 01:09:06,125 您摸摸您的 1618 01:09:06,250 --> 01:09:06,666 摸脸? 1619 01:09:06,750 --> 01:09:07,833 您摸到了什么? 1620 01:09:07,916 --> 01:09:08,416 胡子! 1621 01:09:08,500 --> 01:09:08,916 不对 1622 01:09:09,166 --> 01:09:10,375 您摸到了笑 1623 01:09:10,708 --> 01:09:13,041 摸到了像孩子一样的笑容 1624 01:09:13,333 --> 01:09:14,750 您有四十多年 1625 01:09:15,000 --> 01:09:17,458 没有这么从心底上笑过啦! 1626 01:09:17,541 --> 01:09:18,375 你这狗日的 1627 01:09:18,458 --> 01:09:20,500 四十年从来没跟我笑过 1628 01:09:23,291 --> 01:09:24,208 我笑了!我笑了! 1629 01:09:24,291 --> 01:09:25,708 笑了笑了! 1630 01:09:25,791 --> 01:09:27,666 我必须好好报答你呀I 1631 01:09:27,750 --> 01:09:28,166 不用 1632 01:09:28,250 --> 01:09:28,666 快说! 1633 01:09:29,500 --> 01:09:30,708 我从不欠人情 1634 01:09:30,791 --> 01:09:31,708 一定要说吗? 1635 01:09:31,750 --> 01:09:32,541 说呀! 1636 01:09:32,916 --> 01:09:33,500 放了他们两个 1637 01:09:33,583 --> 01:09:34,416 耶!哈哈哈… 1638 01:09:34,500 --> 01:09:35,333 你闭上嘴! 1639 01:09:38,375 --> 01:09:38,958 大帅… 1640 01:09:40,833 --> 01:09:43,291 请您放了他们两个! 1641 01:09:46,250 --> 01:09:48,625 这可真是奇耻大辱啊 1642 01:09:49,125 --> 01:09:50,041 噩梦啊 1643 01:09:50,125 --> 01:09:50,916 项警官 1644 01:09:51,083 --> 01:09:53,458 你就不应该跟我弟这种人混这么熟 1645 01:09:53,541 --> 01:09:54,500 是不该太熟 1646 01:09:54,666 --> 01:09:56,000 太熟了就容易出危险 1647 01:09:57,125 --> 01:09:59,583 七八成的谋杀案都是熟人干的 1648 01:09:59,666 --> 01:10:01,208 马走日可跟你很熟 1649 01:10:01,291 --> 01:10:02,250 人家没害你 1650 01:10:02,333 --> 01:10:03,541 刚才还把你给救了 1651 01:10:04,375 --> 01:10:05,208 啊?我呀 1652 01:10:05,875 --> 01:10:07,708 我看你爸也没真想怎么着他们 1653 01:10:08,250 --> 01:10:09,625 也就是想就坡儿下驴 1654 01:10:10,375 --> 01:10:12,750 可没您搭这坡儿驴也下不去 1655 01:10:13,166 --> 01:10:15,000 别看小马儿平时胡说八道的 1656 01:10:15,250 --> 01:10:17,125 关键时刻真够仗义 1657 01:10:17,500 --> 01:10:18,625 武六小姐作证啊 1658 01:10:19,000 --> 01:10:21,291 日后走日若是需要帮忙 1659 01:10:21,666 --> 01:10:23,583 项某定是万死不辞! 1660 01:10:23,875 --> 01:10:24,333 谢了 1661 01:10:33,250 --> 01:10:34,083 多谢相送 1662 01:10:34,416 --> 01:10:35,250 多谢救命! 1663 01:10:36,083 --> 01:10:36,541 帽子 1664 01:10:36,708 --> 01:10:37,208 哎哎哎! 1665 01:10:37,916 --> 01:10:38,500 帽子 1666 01:10:39,958 --> 01:10:41,875 拜托二位一定替兄弟我保密 1667 01:10:42,708 --> 01:10:44,000 第一不能让外人知道 1668 01:10:44,083 --> 01:10:45,541 第二不能让法国人知道 1669 01:10:45,875 --> 01:10:47,458 没事儿的你精神点儿 1670 01:10:47,541 --> 01:10:47,708 哎 1671 01:10:47,791 --> 01:10:48,125 再见 1672 01:10:48,333 --> 01:10:48,750 再见 1673 01:10:59,375 --> 01:11:00,083 马走日 1674 01:11:00,458 --> 01:11:01,416 马走日! 1675 01:11:01,875 --> 01:11:03,791 你成杀人犯啦! 1676 01:11:04,625 --> 01:11:05,166 马走日 1677 01:11:05,250 --> 01:11:05,500 嗯 1678 01:11:05,791 --> 01:11:07,833 我怎么觉得你有点儿奇怪呢? 1679 01:11:09,125 --> 01:11:09,500 啊! 1680 01:11:10,458 --> 01:11:11,208 我奇怪吗? 1681 01:11:12,250 --> 01:11:13,166 说不上来 1682 01:11:13,833 --> 01:11:14,750 反正有点儿不对 1683 01:11:17,375 --> 01:11:19,333 我挺对的没什么事儿 1684 01:11:20,166 --> 01:11:20,875 真没事儿? 1685 01:11:21,458 --> 01:11:23,041 没事儿我能有什么事儿啊 1686 01:11:23,416 --> 01:11:25,250 有事儿你告诉我我可以帮你呀 1687 01:11:25,791 --> 01:11:28,500 我可不敢找你你爸再把我毙喽 1688 01:11:30,208 --> 01:11:33,291 武六小姐那天对我还真好 1689 01:11:33,625 --> 01:11:34,875 一再地问我 1690 01:11:34,958 --> 01:11:37,416 你有什么事情我可以帮忙 1691 01:11:37,791 --> 01:11:39,000 您再瞧瞧我 1692 01:11:39,125 --> 01:11:42,166 装模作样地一再说我没事儿 1693 01:11:42,541 --> 01:11:45,083 我怎么能没事儿呢? 1694 01:11:45,375 --> 01:11:48,500 我都快成了杀人犯了我! 1695 01:11:49,916 --> 01:11:51,083 我就不明白 1696 01:11:51,208 --> 01:11:53,458 为什么一见着完颜 1697 01:11:53,833 --> 01:11:56,750 我就不三不四地装不正经 1698 01:11:57,041 --> 01:11:58,583 可是一见着武六 1699 01:11:58,750 --> 01:12:00,583 我就七上八下 1700 01:12:00,791 --> 01:12:04,458 想说的话一个字儿都说不出口 1701 01:12:06,041 --> 01:12:07,750 楼上有很多北京来的朋友 1702 01:12:07,916 --> 01:12:08,666 不上去坐坐? 1703 01:12:09,083 --> 01:12:09,875 我先把车停下 1704 01:12:10,625 --> 01:12:11,208 五楼见 1705 01:12:11,416 --> 01:12:11,750 好 1706 01:12:32,208 --> 01:12:32,458 嗨 1707 01:12:32,541 --> 01:12:32,916 先生? 1708 01:12:33,333 --> 01:12:34,666 把车钥匙给刚刚那位小姐 1709 01:12:34,750 --> 01:12:35,250 是先生 1710 01:12:36,000 --> 01:12:36,500 钱给你 1711 01:12:36,583 --> 01:12:37,125 谢谢你先生 1712 01:12:37,208 --> 01:12:37,791 谢谢 1713 01:12:37,875 --> 01:12:38,500 谢谢你 1714 01:12:39,000 --> 01:12:41,041 哎先生请上车 1715 01:12:42,208 --> 01:12:43,041 您想去哪里啊? 1716 01:12:44,000 --> 01:12:44,750 哟这么多啊 1717 01:12:45,708 --> 01:12:46,541 你坐上头 1718 01:12:47,416 --> 01:12:49,416 不可以不可以这个不可以啊 1719 01:12:54,000 --> 01:12:57,166 我这算作是舍己救人吗? 1720 01:12:58,333 --> 01:13:01,500 我本该找大帅来救我的命 1721 01:13:01,875 --> 01:13:06,291 可是却阴错阳差地救了项飞同的命 1722 01:13:07,000 --> 01:13:09,875 他倒是从猴儿又变回了人 1723 01:13:10,250 --> 01:13:11,458 可是我呢 1724 01:13:11,750 --> 01:13:16,291 却成了项飞田追捕的杀人犯 1725 01:13:18,958 --> 01:13:22,416 那么这项飞田算是恩将仇报吗 1726 01:13:23,541 --> 01:13:25,708 我到也不完全怨他 1727 01:13:26,541 --> 01:13:30,541 您想啊谁落了难都希望被营救 1728 01:13:31,125 --> 01:13:34,458 可是谁又乐意他落难的那惨相儿 1729 01:13:34,541 --> 01:13:37,333 被人家瞧见被人家记住了呢 1730 01:13:48,625 --> 01:13:53,708 我的确是忘不了这项飞因差点儿被马办喽 1731 01:13:54,250 --> 01:13:58,958 这也就不怪人家项飞田非要把我给法办喽 1732 01:14:00,375 --> 01:14:03,791 项冬田呢倒是没马l1N着我 1733 01:14:03,958 --> 01:14:06,500 他抓了一大堆的嫖客儿 1734 01:14:07,458 --> 01:14:10,333 他把这叶所有没破了的命案 1735 01:14:10,416 --> 01:14:14,875 全算成了是嫖客儿杀舞女了 1736 01:14:15,125 --> 01:14:15,708 嘿!这倒好 1737 01:14:18,541 --> 01:14:20,750 他就这么一路地立功受奖 1738 01:14:21,125 --> 01:14:25,625 最终成了这个上海滩法租界里头 1739 01:14:25,791 --> 01:14:29,000 鼎鼎大名的华人警官 1740 01:14:30,041 --> 01:14:30,958 而我呢 1741 01:14:32,041 --> 01:14:33,625 亡命天涯 1742 01:14:34,250 --> 01:14:35,958 久而久之的 1743 01:14:36,291 --> 01:14:40,958 连我自个儿都不知道我自个,L是谁了 1744 01:15:23,000 --> 01:15:25,791 嗨朋友我在哪里能找到唱京剧的? 1745 01:15:26,041 --> 01:15:28,000 没有北京剧只有上海剧 1746 01:15:28,166 --> 01:15:30,583 上海?不不不京剧 1747 01:15:30,875 --> 01:15:31,500 马走日 1748 01:15:31,625 --> 01:15:32,750 不认得马走日 1749 01:15:33,416 --> 01:15:34,000 马走日 1750 01:15:34,291 --> 01:15:35,250 只有上海剧 1751 01:15:35,333 --> 01:15:36,666 刺杀马走日 1752 01:15:38,708 --> 01:15:40,625 完颜英啊完颜英! 1753 01:15:40,708 --> 01:15:43,458 你这是薄情寡义 1754 01:15:43,833 --> 01:15:45,708 咎由自取! 1755 01:15:45,916 --> 01:15:47,916 她是完颜小英 1756 01:15:48,083 --> 01:15:50,416 我是马嘎走日 1757 01:15:50,708 --> 01:15:53,416 我们俩本是一对狗男女 1758 01:15:54,500 --> 01:15:56,083 她当上了总统 1759 01:15:56,333 --> 01:15:58,041 赚了钱不给我花 1760 01:15:58,333 --> 01:15:59,750 关了灯不让我睡 1761 01:15:59,875 --> 01:16:01,958 我马嘎走日留着她还什么用呢 1762 01:16:02,041 --> 01:16:03,083 没用! 1763 01:16:03,291 --> 01:16:06,583 莫怪我马走日心狠手黑 1764 01:16:06,958 --> 01:16:10,583 替天行道! 1765 01:16:10,708 --> 01:16:13,000 好! 1766 01:16:13,375 --> 01:16:15,833 哎呀坑挖小啦! 1767 01:16:17,125 --> 01:16:18,166 铁锨没有 1768 01:16:18,875 --> 01:16:20,541 不能改坑哇? 1769 01:16:22,250 --> 01:16:23,875 只能改侬啊! 1770 01:16:28,291 --> 01:16:29,000 哪一把啊? 1771 01:16:29,125 --> 01:16:31,750 大的!大的!大的! 1772 01:16:39,875 --> 01:16:47,333 完颜呀总统 1773 01:16:47,791 --> 01:16:55,041 变呀变了心 1774 01:16:55,416 --> 01:17:01,791 小妹妹挣钞票郎花不着 1775 01:17:02,208 --> 01:17:09,041 英呀我只能把你一JJ分 1776 01:17:10,291 --> 01:17:11,875 哎哎哎…你是什么人啊? 1777 01:17:12,208 --> 01:17:15,208 听说你等了我一晚上? 1778 01:17:15,291 --> 01:17:16,875 能跟您老见上面 1779 01:17:17,458 --> 01:17:18,541 就是等上一年 1780 01:17:18,791 --> 01:17:19,625 也值! 1781 01:17:20,083 --> 01:17:20,958 想演戏? 1782 01:17:21,041 --> 01:17:21,583 不是 1783 01:17:21,791 --> 01:17:23,041 我呢受人之托 1784 01:17:23,416 --> 01:17:25,000 给您老带点儿东西 1785 01:17:25,708 --> 01:17:26,291 谁呀? 1786 01:17:26,791 --> 01:17:27,750 马走H… 1787 01:17:28,125 --> 01:17:29,541 的表哥 1788 01:17:34,416 --> 01:17:36,708 啊是吧 1789 01:17:44,125 --> 01:17:46,250 哎哟太客气了 1790 01:17:47,708 --> 01:17:49,375 来!上茶 1791 01:17:50,000 --> 01:17:51,125 他表哥… 1792 01:17:51,291 --> 01:17:53,250 除了让你捎了这点儿金子 1793 01:17:53,375 --> 01:17:54,625 先生请喝茶 1794 01:17:55,125 --> 01:17:55,750 谢了您 1795 01:17:56,541 --> 01:17:58,458 还有没有其他的… 1796 01:17:58,916 --> 01:18:02,333 表哥呢还让我给您老带来三句话 1797 01:18:02,458 --> 01:18:02,916 请讲 1798 01:18:03,166 --> 01:18:04,125 这头一句呢 1799 01:18:04,208 --> 01:18:04,541 嗯 1800 01:18:04,750 --> 01:18:05,583 是希望您 1801 01:18:06,625 --> 01:18:08,208 老老实实做人 1802 01:18:08,666 --> 01:18:10,166 认认真真演戏 1803 01:18:10,250 --> 01:18:11,250 这个不用说! 1804 01:18:11,333 --> 01:18:12,250 来第二句 1805 01:18:12,458 --> 01:18:13,625 第二句是呢… 1806 01:18:13,708 --> 01:18:14,166 嗯 1807 01:18:15,458 --> 01:18:16,291 他希望您呐 1808 01:18:16,375 --> 01:18:16,750 嗯 1809 01:18:17,541 --> 01:18:18,583 以后能不能… 1810 01:18:19,333 --> 01:18:22,458 不要再演《枪毙马走日》了 1811 01:18:22,791 --> 01:18:23,250 为什么? 1812 01:18:23,458 --> 01:18:24,208 因为呢… 1813 01:18:24,791 --> 01:18:27,416 这么下去对马走日呢 1814 01:18:27,541 --> 01:18:28,125 不利! 1815 01:18:28,333 --> 01:18:29,416 对您老自个儿 1816 01:18:29,875 --> 01:18:30,583 更不利! 1817 01:18:31,916 --> 01:18:32,375 第三句 1818 01:18:32,458 --> 01:18:33,666 第三句是呢… 1819 01:18:33,750 --> 01:18:35,083 您老都记住了么 1820 01:18:35,208 --> 01:18:38,250 我是问他让你捎的第三句话是什么 1821 01:18:38,333 --> 01:18:40,125 表哥捎的第三句话就是 1822 01:18:40,208 --> 01:18:41,750 问您老都记住了么 1823 01:18:41,916 --> 01:18:45,458 嘿!啧!他表哥他… 1824 01:18:48,208 --> 01:18:49,708 我就是想了解一下 1825 01:18:50,250 --> 01:18:52,416 他表哥到底是干什么的? 1826 01:18:54,708 --> 01:18:55,625 表哥呢… 1827 01:18:56,416 --> 01:18:57,625 他是嘛都不干 1828 01:18:58,291 --> 01:18:59,708 又是嘛都干 1829 01:19:00,250 --> 01:19:02,583 拿人钱财替人消灾呗 1830 01:19:02,666 --> 01:19:03,625 他就是干这个的 1831 01:19:03,958 --> 01:19:04,666 这一次 1832 01:19:04,833 --> 01:19:07,583 他是头一回给别人送钱 1833 01:19:07,708 --> 01:19:11,000 昨天呐有人威胁我 1834 01:19:11,125 --> 01:19:11,500 啊?! 1835 01:19:11,625 --> 01:19:14,333 企图收买我让我不演这出戏了 1836 01:19:14,625 --> 01:19:16,000 我现在听听大家的意见 1837 01:19:16,083 --> 01:19:16,708 我是演还是不演? 1838 01:19:17,083 --> 01:19:18,375 演!演!演! 1839 01:19:18,458 --> 01:19:20,250 那这个人砍还是不砍呐? 1840 01:19:20,333 --> 01:19:21,625 砍!砍i砍! 1841 01:19:21,708 --> 01:19:22,958 用哪把JY砍? 1842 01:19:23,083 --> 01:19:24,541 大7J!大I11 1843 01:19:24,666 --> 01:19:26,458 嘿!都不用啦! 1844 01:19:34,375 --> 01:19:35,333 砍完怎么办? 1845 01:19:35,916 --> 01:19:38,583 继续、继续 1846 01:19:38,666 --> 01:19:41,666 今天我是只杀不用 1847 01:19:43,125 --> 01:19:45,875 明天我是只用不杀 1848 01:19:46,708 --> 01:19:49,666 后天我是又用又杀 1849 01:19:51,250 --> 01:19:53,250 若想看全我的戏 1850 01:19:53,333 --> 01:19:55,208 要连看三天! 1851 01:19:58,750 --> 01:20:06,375 完颜呀总统 1852 01:20:06,875 --> 01:20:11,750 变呀变了心 1853 01:24:11,083 --> 01:24:13,375 花域大总统刚壺出来就死了 1854 01:24:13,500 --> 01:24:15,666 杀她的人居然是她的姘头儿 1855 01:24:15,750 --> 01:24:16,916 杀完他就跑了 1856 01:24:17,083 --> 01:24:19,875 跑了两年还是让我给抓回来了! 1857 01:24:19,916 --> 01:24:22,166 最了不起的是(法语l 1858 01:24:22,250 --> 01:24:23,666 整个过程(法语l 1859 01:24:23,833 --> 01:24:26,708 都被武六小姐的摄影机拍下来了(法语) 1860 01:24:28,000 --> 01:24:30,541 拍的都是真人真事(法语l 1861 01:24:30,625 --> 01:24:32,541 你们创造了历史的一根柱子(法语) 1862 01:24:32,625 --> 01:24:34,083 这真是前所未有的(法语1 1863 01:24:34,250 --> 01:24:37,041 连在巴黎都没见过(法语1 1864 01:24:37,125 --> 01:24:38,416 这是前所未有的事儿 1865 01:24:38,500 --> 01:24:40,791 若非项某人亲力亲为 1866 01:24:40,958 --> 01:24:44,166 断然不敢相信这千载难逢的奇迹 1867 01:24:44,250 --> 01:24:46,916 你说这好事儿全让你们给捞着了哈? 1868 01:24:47,875 --> 01:24:50,750 机遇总是垂青那些有准备的人么 1869 01:24:50,833 --> 01:24:51,541 我问你们 1870 01:24:51,708 --> 01:24:53,291 这个电影讲什么故事? 1871 01:24:53,416 --> 01:24:55,000 项警官枪毙马走日啊 1872 01:24:55,083 --> 01:24:55,791 为什么枪毙? 1873 01:24:55,875 --> 01:24:56,916 杀了完颜英啊 1874 01:24:56,958 --> 01:24:58,666 他什么时候杀的?为什么杀? 1875 01:24:58,708 --> 01:24:59,875 他又怎么杀的 1876 01:25:00,083 --> 01:25:01,291 谁又看见他杀了? 1877 01:25:02,458 --> 01:25:03,458 这些都没有 1878 01:25:04,041 --> 01:25:06,333 说明这个电影根本就没拍完 1879 01:25:08,500 --> 01:25:10,125 人都死了事儿都过去了 1880 01:25:10,416 --> 01:25:11,208 你怎么拍呀? 1881 01:25:11,875 --> 01:25:13,833 咱随便找一人演不就完了吗 1882 01:25:14,333 --> 01:25:16,041 你妈不是演老生的吗 1883 01:25:16,208 --> 01:25:17,125 可以演马走日 1884 01:25:17,375 --> 01:25:18,750 你妈可以演! 1885 01:25:18,833 --> 01:25:21,208 我妈要演也只能演完颜 1886 01:25:21,458 --> 01:25:22,541 她演不了男的 1887 01:25:22,583 --> 01:25:23,375 你妈是男的… 1888 01:25:23,416 --> 01:25:24,916 你妈才是男的呢! 1889 01:25:25,166 --> 01:25:26,625 只聊电影不聊妈 1890 01:25:26,708 --> 01:25:27,750 妈都是女的 1891 01:25:27,875 --> 01:25:30,041 那当然了这是全世界都一样 1892 01:25:30,125 --> 01:25:31,916 当然了那当然! (法语) 1893 01:25:32,250 --> 01:25:35,375 我很喜欢你们的生活方式(法语) 1894 01:25:35,666 --> 01:25:37,125 一个男的几年老婆(法语) 1895 01:25:37,166 --> 01:25:38,375 (很多孩子到处跑! (法语) 1896 01:25:38,416 --> 01:25:39,666 (多好啊多好啊! (法语) 1897 01:25:39,750 --> 01:25:41,750 就为这个我也想当个中国人 1898 01:25:42,666 --> 01:25:43,083 我问你 1899 01:25:43,166 --> 01:25:44,000 你爸… 1900 01:25:44,875 --> 01:25:47,083 有没有计划娶一个新的老婆? 1901 01:25:47,291 --> 01:25:48,000 问你爸呢 1902 01:25:48,750 --> 01:25:49,375 没准儿 1903 01:25:51,791 --> 01:25:53,458 要找一个好演员这是关键的 1904 01:25:53,541 --> 01:25:54,833 要找一流的演员 1905 01:25:55,125 --> 01:25:57,083 非王天王莫属 1906 01:25:57,416 --> 01:25:58,666 他那个看家戏 1907 01:25:58,875 --> 01:25:59,833 《枪毙马走日》 1908 01:26:00,166 --> 01:26:01,250 已经演了一千多场 1909 01:26:01,541 --> 01:26:03,333 法国戏剧节都求他去 1910 01:26:03,666 --> 01:26:04,458 马走日! 1911 01:26:06,000 --> 01:26:07,583 马走日演马走日! 1912 01:26:10,458 --> 01:26:12,500 牛牛! (法语) 1913 01:26:12,750 --> 01:26:14,208 男主角是杀人犯 1914 01:26:14,291 --> 01:26:15,750 杀人犯是男主角 1915 01:26:16,125 --> 01:26:17,375 (牛! (法语) 1916 01:26:17,583 --> 01:26:20,250 电影的关键就是真人演真事儿 1917 01:26:20,416 --> 01:26:22,416 关键是真人杀了他的朋友 1918 01:26:22,458 --> 01:26:23,541 关键的关键是 1919 01:26:23,666 --> 01:26:25,416 他的朋友最后把他枪毙了 1920 01:26:25,708 --> 01:26:27,541 等会儿六姐哪儿是关键呀? 1921 01:26:27,875 --> 01:26:29,333 关键是枪毙马走口啊! 1922 01:26:29,416 --> 01:26:30,125 真毙假毙? 1923 01:26:30,333 --> 01:26:31,625 他真杀了人真枪毙 1924 01:26:31,708 --> 01:26:33,125 那可是你的旧相识啊 1925 01:26:33,166 --> 01:26:34,750 论旧也旧不过项警官呀 1926 01:26:34,958 --> 01:26:36,750 法律面前不论新旧 1927 01:26:36,791 --> 01:26:37,750 对女人下手 1928 01:26:37,875 --> 01:26:39,875 搁全世界来讲都该枪毙 1929 01:26:40,375 --> 01:26:41,083 拍完就毙 1930 01:26:41,291 --> 01:26:42,250 毙必须毙! 1931 01:26:42,333 --> 01:26:44,000 哎!我替你毙呀 1932 01:26:44,041 --> 01:26:45,666 我拿着枪在他脑袋后头 1933 01:26:45,708 --> 01:26:47,041 我就啪!啪!啪! 1934 01:26:47,125 --> 01:26:48,833 (冷静冷静! (法语) 1935 01:26:48,916 --> 01:26:50,125 这电影儿可真是啊! 1936 01:26:50,250 --> 01:26:52,708 前不见古人后不见来者啊 1937 01:26:52,875 --> 01:26:54,458 两头儿见不着人! 1938 01:26:54,583 --> 01:26:56,208 (改写历史又多一根柱子(法语) 1939 01:26:56,291 --> 01:26:58,375 我必须把这部电影带到巴黎博览会去(法语) 1940 01:26:58,500 --> 01:26:59,000 不用巴黎 1941 01:26:59,041 --> 01:27:00,500 上海就行在上海办! 1942 01:27:00,625 --> 01:27:02,208 跟花域大选一个规模 1943 01:27:02,250 --> 01:27:03,166 也选总统 1944 01:27:03,250 --> 01:27:04,250 得用一个新词儿 1945 01:27:04,375 --> 01:27:05,625 影帝!影后! 1946 01:27:05,666 --> 01:27:07,250 这下我钱可有地儿花了 1947 01:27:07,458 --> 01:27:08,500 咱也设立一大奖 1948 01:27:08,708 --> 01:27:09,416 金葱花奖! 1949 01:27:09,833 --> 01:27:11,541 男的给金葱女的给金花 1950 01:27:11,791 --> 01:27:13,500 好敬金葱花! 1951 01:27:13,541 --> 01:27:14,458 牛! (法语) 1952 01:27:15,125 --> 01:27:17,666 迫不及待地想看这部电影啦! 1953 01:27:18,000 --> 01:27:19,208 马走日一到位 1954 01:27:19,375 --> 01:27:20,083 电影就开拍 1955 01:27:20,125 --> 01:27:21,083 他要是不愿意演呢? 1956 01:27:21,458 --> 01:27:23,041 那就看项警官的本事了 1957 01:27:23,708 --> 01:27:25,208 我只有五成的把握 1958 01:27:25,541 --> 01:27:26,750 我给你讲个故事 1959 01:27:27,166 --> 01:27:28,250 你讲给他听 1960 01:27:28,375 --> 01:27:29,458 保证加五成儿! 1961 01:27:29,791 --> 01:27:31,000 长吗故事? 1962 01:27:31,333 --> 01:27:32,291 我记不住啊! 1963 01:27:33,375 --> 01:27:35,083 敬礼! (安南语) 1964 01:27:35,291 --> 01:27:35,750 稍息 1965 01:27:36,583 --> 01:27:38,291 敬礼 (多南语) 1966 01:27:38,708 --> 01:27:39,250 稍息 1967 01:27:39,541 --> 01:27:41,333 (敬礼! (安南语) 1968 01:27:42,333 --> 01:27:43,000 稍息 1969 01:27:47,416 --> 01:27:50,541 杀了完颜潜逃两年 1970 01:27:50,708 --> 01:27:52,625 本可就此逍遥法外 1971 01:27:52,833 --> 01:27:55,458 却见不得一个名角儿… 1972 01:27:55,541 --> 01:27:56,750 辱没自己 1973 01:27:57,041 --> 01:27:58,083 愤然出手! 1974 01:27:58,458 --> 01:28:00,875 打了王天王进了牢房 1975 01:28:00,958 --> 01:28:02,458 面对死亡 1976 01:28:03,208 --> 01:28:04,000 不错! 1977 01:28:05,083 --> 01:28:05,791 工是如此 1978 01:28:06,250 --> 01:28:07,375 不可理喻 1979 01:28:12,000 --> 01:28:12,666 我问你 1980 01:28:12,791 --> 01:28:14,833 你要是再见到这个名角儿王天王 1981 01:28:14,875 --> 01:28:16,041 你还打他吗? 1982 01:28:18,375 --> 01:28:18,833 打! 1983 01:28:20,416 --> 01:28:21,958 可杀不可辱是吗! 1984 01:28:22,625 --> 01:28:23,875 人呐什么都不怕 1985 01:28:24,000 --> 01:28:24,875 就怕不理智 1986 01:28:26,250 --> 01:28:27,541 我面对着死 1987 01:28:28,125 --> 01:28:31,208 理智不理智有什么不一样? 1988 01:28:31,375 --> 01:28:32,083 哎! 1989 01:28:32,583 --> 01:28:33,208 小马儿 1990 01:28:34,041 --> 01:28:35,958 我现在就给你讲一个 1991 01:28:36,041 --> 01:28:38,500 面对死亡理智的故事 1992 01:28:38,875 --> 01:28:40,458 日本有丫时代叫江户 1993 01:28:40,583 --> 01:28:42,291 江户时代有个武士 1994 01:28:42,625 --> 01:28:45,083 武士的名字叫日夏步 1995 01:28:45,541 --> 01:28:47,250 日夏步七岁那年 1996 01:28:47,333 --> 01:28:48,791 他爸爸闯了大祸 1997 01:28:49,291 --> 01:28:51,208 全国通缉追杀 1998 01:28:51,500 --> 01:28:53,208 一个夜晚没有月亮 1999 01:28:53,500 --> 01:28:54,666 官兵来到家里 2000 01:28:54,708 --> 01:28:56,625 提着一颗人头问日夏步 2001 01:28:57,458 --> 01:28:58,416 这是你父亲吗? 2002 01:28:59,166 --> 01:29:00,208 ?夏步摇、L说 2003 01:29:00,750 --> 01:29:01,583 这干是我爸 2004 01:29:02,375 --> 01:29:03,541 又是一个夜晚 2005 01:29:03,791 --> 01:29:04,833 又是没有月亮 2006 01:29:05,083 --> 01:29:06,541 又是官兵来到家里 2007 01:29:06,625 --> 01:29:08,541 提着一颗人头问日夏步 2008 01:29:08,666 --> 01:29:09,833 这是你父亲吗? 2009 01:29:10,083 --> 01:29:11,541 日夏步依然摇头说 2010 01:29:12,125 --> 01:29:12,958 这不是我爸 2011 01:29:13,375 --> 01:29:14,666 还是一个夜晚 2012 01:29:14,791 --> 01:29:16,000 还是没有月亮 2013 01:29:16,333 --> 01:29:17,958 还是官兵来到家里 2014 01:29:18,333 --> 01:29:19,625 还是提着一颗人头 2015 01:29:19,875 --> 01:29:21,625 还是朝日夏步大喊 2016 01:29:22,208 --> 01:29:23,208 这是你父亲吗? 2017 01:29:24,291 --> 01:29:26,958 小日夏步盯着人头 2018 01:29:27,291 --> 01:29:28,500 凝视良久 2019 01:29:29,083 --> 01:29:30,208 脸色一变 2020 01:29:30,416 --> 01:29:31,500 倒头便拜! 2021 01:29:31,833 --> 01:29:32,875 抽出短刀 2022 01:29:32,958 --> 01:29:34,791 剖腹自尽口中高喊 2023 01:29:35,000 --> 01:29:35,750 爸爸… 2024 01:29:36,333 --> 01:29:38,041 儿子随你而去! 2025 01:29:45,208 --> 01:29:45,791 莫非… 2026 01:29:47,125 --> 01:29:48,416 你要随我而去? 2027 01:29:50,250 --> 01:29:51,166 马走日! 2028 01:29:51,291 --> 01:29:52,125 项飞田I 2029 01:29:52,541 --> 01:29:53,500 我不需要你 2030 01:29:53,916 --> 01:29:54,916 我自己能走! 2031 01:29:55,000 --> 01:29:58,291 哈哈哈… 2032 01:29:59,291 --> 01:30:00,000 走日 2033 01:30:00,666 --> 01:30:03,458 这可是日本最经典的武士故事 2034 01:30:03,666 --> 01:30:04,500 可笑 2035 01:30:05,500 --> 01:30:08,125 不过是一个普通孝子的故事 2036 01:30:08,666 --> 01:30:09,166 错! 2037 01:30:09,666 --> 01:30:12,541 这不是儿子随爸爸而去的故事 2038 01:30:13,333 --> 01:30:15,500 是儿子救爸爸的故事! 2039 01:30:16,000 --> 01:30:18,750 那几个人头里有他爸爸吗? 2040 01:30:22,666 --> 01:30:23,500 没有! 2041 01:30:32,125 --> 01:30:33,958 儿子随父而去的义举 2042 01:30:34,000 --> 01:30:36,458 使官兵深信他的爸爸已经死了 2043 01:30:37,041 --> 01:30:39,208 从而解除通缉追杀 2044 01:30:40,041 --> 01:30:42,791 可是两年多了 2045 01:30:43,458 --> 01:30:45,916 各方戏院已经把我枪毙了 2046 01:30:46,000 --> 01:30:47,750 若干回若干回了 2047 01:30:48,500 --> 01:30:50,166 我怎么还没得救呢? 2048 01:30:50,666 --> 01:30:51,458 知道为什么吗? 2049 01:30:51,541 --> 01:30:53,916 我没有那个小日夏步呗! 2050 01:30:54,083 --> 01:30:54,541 有! 2051 01:30:56,791 --> 01:30:58,500 你就是那个小日夏步 2052 01:30:59,291 --> 01:31:01,750 你也是他的父亲那个老日夏步 2053 01:31:02,333 --> 01:31:03,666 你能不能从容逃生 2054 01:31:04,000 --> 01:31:05,791 就看你能不能切腹自尽 2055 01:31:07,750 --> 01:31:10,125 那你是让我活还是让我死啊? 2056 01:31:10,208 --> 01:31:10,958 又冲动! 2057 01:31:11,250 --> 01:31:12,500 我的谋略是 2058 01:31:12,791 --> 01:31:16,416 你把杀死完颜英的电影儿演了 2059 01:31:16,708 --> 01:31:19,208 把马走日的丑恶、卑劣、无耻 2060 01:31:19,583 --> 01:31:21,500 淋漓尽致地表现出来 2061 01:31:21,791 --> 01:31:23,625 进而被我枪决 2062 01:31:23,875 --> 01:31:25,208 而真正的你 2063 01:31:25,250 --> 01:31:28,041 却变成了信封里的安南人 2064 01:31:29,833 --> 01:31:31,000 阮青山! 2065 01:31:35,916 --> 01:31:38,333 那什么那您枪毙那位? 2066 01:31:38,416 --> 01:31:39,958 自然不是你本人呐! 2067 01:31:41,000 --> 01:31:43,208 哦 2068 01:31:45,083 --> 01:31:46,041 哦是这么着 2069 01:31:46,125 --> 01:31:47,250 囚犯很多 2070 01:31:47,291 --> 01:31:49,000 戴上头套押上刑场 2071 01:31:49,250 --> 01:31:50,125 一枪爆头! 2072 01:31:50,250 --> 01:31:52,208 谁能说他不是你马走日? 2073 01:31:52,333 --> 01:31:54,500 兄弟手足肝胆相照 2074 01:31:54,750 --> 01:31:56,875 我为你甘愿铤而走险 2075 01:31:57,541 --> 01:31:58,166 小马儿 2076 01:31:58,500 --> 01:31:59,416 你好好想想 2077 01:32:02,541 --> 01:32:03,708 你要是愿意 2078 01:32:04,416 --> 01:32:05,833 就把这个信封给撕开 2079 01:32:14,250 --> 01:32:15,666 叫武六来见我 2080 01:32:17,166 --> 01:32:18,708 有名角儿陪你! 2081 01:32:26,500 --> 01:32:30,291 马走日!马走日!马走日! 2082 01:32:32,291 --> 01:32:34,833 老老实实做人认认真真演戏 2083 01:32:34,958 --> 01:32:35,291 说! 2084 01:32:35,583 --> 01:32:36,291 为什么啊? 2085 01:32:37,958 --> 01:32:39,708 你教我的你会 2086 01:32:40,250 --> 01:32:40,583 说! 2087 01:32:42,833 --> 01:32:44,041 老老实实做人 2088 01:32:44,375 --> 01:32:45,333 认认真真演戏 2089 01:32:46,291 --> 01:32:47,375 用上海话说 2090 01:32:47,666 --> 01:32:48,625 不会说上海话 2091 01:32:49,125 --> 01:32:51,000 老老实实做人 2092 01:32:51,208 --> 01:32:52,958 老老实实做人 2093 01:32:53,375 --> 01:32:56,625 认认真真演戏 2094 01:32:56,916 --> 01:32:58,958 认认真真做人 2095 01:32:59,375 --> 01:33:00,458 演戏 2096 01:33:00,541 --> 01:33:01,458 演戏! 2097 01:33:01,750 --> 01:33:02,791 连起来说一遍 2098 01:33:02,833 --> 01:33:04,208 老老实实做人 2099 01:33:04,250 --> 01:33:05,708 认认真真演戏! 2100 01:33:05,750 --> 01:33:06,250 侬看 2101 01:33:06,708 --> 01:33:07,708 你的杀人现场 2102 01:33:07,791 --> 01:33:09,250 我现在给你布置得怎么样? 2103 01:33:09,541 --> 01:33:10,250 浪漫吧 2104 01:33:10,458 --> 01:33:11,291 大气吧 2105 01:33:11,416 --> 01:33:12,250 有腔调吧? 2106 01:33:12,916 --> 01:33:13,625 换衣裳去啊! 2107 01:33:14,375 --> 01:33:16,333 马走日!马走日!马走日! 2108 01:33:16,500 --> 01:33:17,541 安静点儿安静点儿 2109 01:33:17,916 --> 01:33:20,000 谁再说话就给我滚出去 2110 01:33:22,250 --> 01:33:23,208 客气点呀! 2111 01:33:24,583 --> 01:33:25,875 这些都是我朋友呀 2112 01:33:25,916 --> 01:33:26,708 朋友朋友朋友 2113 01:33:27,166 --> 01:33:28,875 龙虾三吃晓得不啦 2114 01:33:29,083 --> 01:33:29,791 晓得晓得晓得 2115 01:33:30,833 --> 01:33:31,875 电影拍了 2116 01:33:32,458 --> 01:33:35,166 顺便观众票子也卖了 2117 01:33:35,208 --> 01:33:36,041 卖了卖了卖了 2118 01:33:37,875 --> 01:33:40,750 马走日!马走日!马走日! 2119 01:33:46,458 --> 01:33:48,291 为什么让你穿成这样 2120 01:33:49,375 --> 01:33:51,208 世界语言嘛 2121 01:33:51,375 --> 01:33:52,500 哈哈哈… 2122 01:33:52,583 --> 01:33:53,875 你这个阿无卵啊 2123 01:33:54,125 --> 01:33:55,291 真是让我羡慕 2124 01:33:55,750 --> 01:33:57,083 能演电影 2125 01:33:58,458 --> 01:33:59,166 观众朋友们 2126 01:33:59,333 --> 01:34:00,041 电影是什么? 2127 01:34:00,250 --> 01:34:04,416 电影就是全世界的观众都能看得懂的艺术 2128 01:34:04,833 --> 01:34:06,541 有一句话是这么说的 2129 01:34:07,083 --> 01:34:09,625 越是本地的就越是世界的 2130 01:34:09,875 --> 01:34:11,166 这话我很不同意! 2131 01:34:11,708 --> 01:34:13,291 越是长春就越是上海的? 2132 01:34:14,666 --> 01:34:17,250 长春就是长春上海就是上海嘛 2133 01:34:17,458 --> 01:34:18,125 所以说是 2134 01:34:18,416 --> 01:34:21,958 越是世界的万越是世界的 2135 01:34:22,208 --> 01:34:23,333 你看你这身这么一穿 2136 01:34:23,625 --> 01:34:25,000 观众一目了然 2137 01:34:25,166 --> 01:34:27,500 马走日是个丧心病狂的 2138 01:34:27,916 --> 01:34:28,333 阿无卵! 2139 01:34:28,666 --> 01:34:29,916 哈哈哈… 2140 01:34:30,625 --> 01:34:31,916 我们开始拍电影啦 2141 01:34:32,166 --> 01:34:32,875 布机位啊 2142 01:34:34,333 --> 01:34:35,000 赶紧上车 2143 01:34:35,375 --> 01:34:35,958 躺好啊 2144 01:34:36,500 --> 01:34:38,000 你现在要闭上眼睛 2145 01:34:38,250 --> 01:34:39,000 你已经死了 2146 01:34:39,125 --> 01:34:40,250 我害怕嘛! 2147 01:34:40,333 --> 01:34:40,958 怕什么? 2148 01:34:42,416 --> 01:34:43,000 你怕他? 2149 01:34:44,375 --> 01:34:46,375 那么多的法国警察都在这儿 2150 01:34:46,541 --> 01:34:49,000 他但凡要对你有不轨的行为 2151 01:34:49,333 --> 01:34:49,958 立即枪毙! 2152 01:34:50,000 --> 01:34:51,833 我们拍的就是《枪毙马走日》嘛 2153 01:34:52,000 --> 01:34:53,708 不行的话我们今天两场戏就一块拍了 2154 01:34:53,833 --> 01:34:54,375 Slate! (打板l 2155 01:34:54,625 --> 01:34:55,750 《枪毙马走日》 2156 01:34:56,041 --> 01:34:57,250 第一场、第一镜、第一次! 2157 01:34:57,375 --> 01:34:57,916 A机 2158 01:34:58,833 --> 01:34:59,416 B机 2159 01:35:00,000 --> 01:35:01,125 C机 D机 2160 01:35:01,500 --> 01:35:02,125 Carneral I开拍! l 2161 01:35:11,125 --> 01:35:12,083 快点啊 2162 01:35:13,916 --> 01:35:16,833 哎哟你这个节奏完全不对嘛! 2163 01:35:17,458 --> 01:35:19,333 你自己做过的事情你全忘啦? 2164 01:35:20,000 --> 01:35:20,916 我现在教你 2165 01:35:21,166 --> 01:35:23,458 我教你怎么演你就怎么演 2166 01:35:23,625 --> 01:35:24,791 来把车门打开 2167 01:35:26,875 --> 01:35:28,708 哎把完颜抱下来 2168 01:35:29,166 --> 01:35:29,875 拖到后面去 2169 01:35:32,416 --> 01:35:35,083 很好很好快快拖 2170 01:35:35,458 --> 01:35:36,750 哎往后拖 2171 01:35:37,916 --> 01:35:39,083 躺下让她躺下 2172 01:35:40,791 --> 01:35:41,916 好马走日 2173 01:35:42,375 --> 01:35:42,750 接住! 2174 01:35:44,083 --> 01:35:44,666 宰人 2175 01:35:46,250 --> 01:35:47,291 用点力气啊 2176 01:35:47,750 --> 01:35:49,375 一 二 三 2177 01:35:49,666 --> 01:35:50,500 宰i 2178 01:35:53,125 --> 01:35:54,458 侬快呀I 2179 01:35:55,041 --> 01:36:04,458 完颜呀总统变呀变了 2180 01:36:04,625 --> 01:36:06,041 哎好极啦! 2181 01:36:06,333 --> 01:36:08,291 来继续继续 2182 01:36:10,333 --> 01:36:11,541 继续啊 2183 01:36:14,250 --> 01:36:16,291 开始啊把JJ先放下 2184 01:36:16,666 --> 01:36:17,625 动起来 2185 01:36:18,000 --> 01:36:19,416 哎I哎!哎! 2186 01:36:21,041 --> 01:36:22,333 他还学会造反了 2187 01:36:22,583 --> 01:36:23,416 马走日! 2188 01:36:24,500 --> 01:36:25,125 警察! 2189 01:36:25,375 --> 01:36:26,250 法国警察! 2190 01:36:26,750 --> 01:36:27,666 警察! 2191 01:36:41,791 --> 01:36:43,583 请让我跟他说几句话好吗? 2192 01:36:43,791 --> 01:36:44,583 警官先生 2193 01:36:45,000 --> 01:36:45,458 好 2194 01:36:45,708 --> 01:36:46,750 就给你两分钟! 2195 01:36:47,708 --> 01:36:48,458 马走日 2196 01:36:49,625 --> 01:36:51,208 我看你是不想活了 2197 01:36:51,458 --> 01:36:52,833 枪毙了我吧 2198 01:36:53,208 --> 01:36:54,250 别装硬汉 2199 01:36:54,708 --> 01:36:55,500 那天 2200 01:36:55,791 --> 01:36:57,833 项警官没跟你说清楚吗? 2201 01:36:58,250 --> 01:36:59,416 拍完电影 2202 01:36:59,833 --> 01:37:01,333 就把你放了! 2203 01:37:01,875 --> 01:37:03,250 说得很清楚 2204 01:37:04,791 --> 01:37:06,250 可是我演不了 2205 01:37:07,291 --> 01:37:09,666 你是害怕面对自己的丑恶? 2206 01:37:09,833 --> 01:37:10,958 不丑恶! 2207 01:37:11,541 --> 01:37:13,000 我没有杀完颜! 2208 01:37:14,208 --> 01:37:16,666 完颜是因我而死 2209 01:37:17,166 --> 01:37:18,333 枪毙我 2210 01:37:19,000 --> 01:37:19,958 我不冤枉 2211 01:37:20,791 --> 01:37:22,083 可是完颜 2212 01:37:22,833 --> 01:37:24,416 不应该受辱骂 2213 01:37:25,250 --> 01:37:26,875 她是个体面的人 2214 01:37:27,666 --> 01:37:29,375 她是个要强的人 2215 01:37:30,250 --> 01:37:31,250 那那天 2216 01:37:31,875 --> 01:37:33,791 你做了什么致她而死? 2217 01:37:34,125 --> 01:37:35,500 我不能告诉你 2218 01:37:35,583 --> 01:37:35,958 为什么? 2219 01:37:36,041 --> 01:37:37,875 因为我不记得! 2220 01:37:43,416 --> 01:37:44,000 那天 2221 01:37:44,833 --> 01:37:46,208 她突然很高兴 2222 01:37:47,208 --> 01:37:48,208 想听我说爱她 2223 01:37:49,333 --> 01:37:50,208 我没说 2224 01:37:51,041 --> 01:37:52,416 她还想让我娶她 2225 01:37:53,708 --> 01:37:54,875 可是我没娶 2226 01:37:56,208 --> 01:37:57,500 我给她抽了大烟 2227 01:37:59,208 --> 01:38:00,958 开车带她出去兜风 2228 01:38:02,250 --> 01:38:03,458 那天的月亮… 2229 01:38:05,083 --> 01:38:06,166 特别大… 2230 01:38:07,750 --> 01:38:08,666 特别大! 2231 01:38:10,291 --> 01:38:11,208 她跟我说… 2232 01:38:13,083 --> 01:38:14,250 咱们上月亮吧 2233 01:38:15,583 --> 01:38:17,375 我就开车带她上了月亮 2234 01:38:18,916 --> 01:38:19,958 等我醒过来… 2235 01:38:20,625 --> 01:38:21,583 车翻了 2236 01:38:22,625 --> 01:38:24,000 她就死在那儿 2237 01:38:25,458 --> 01:38:27,083 跟睡着了一样 2238 01:38:29,958 --> 01:38:30,666 把面具摘了 2239 01:38:31,791 --> 01:38:32,250 不摘 2240 01:38:32,541 --> 01:38:33,000 摘了! 2241 01:38:33,375 --> 01:38:33,875 不摘! 2242 01:38:34,000 --> 01:38:34,416 摘了! 2243 01:38:34,875 --> 01:38:35,541 不摘! 2244 01:38:41,083 --> 01:38:41,958 马走日 2245 01:38:43,875 --> 01:38:45,125 我能相信你吗? 2246 01:39:09,583 --> 01:39:10,916 开灯开灯开开开! 2247 01:39:14,666 --> 01:39:16,416 改写历史得两根jl柱子 2248 01:39:16,583 --> 01:39:18,500 马走日他不演杀人 2249 01:39:18,708 --> 01:39:19,416 断了一根儿 2250 01:39:19,625 --> 01:39:20,375 还有一根儿 2251 01:39:20,541 --> 01:39:22,166 就是枪毙真人马走日 2252 01:39:22,250 --> 01:39:24,833 一根儿只能改写历史的一半儿啊 2253 01:39:24,916 --> 01:39:27,166 改写一半儿那叫改写历史吗? 2254 01:39:27,333 --> 01:39:28,833 显然改变不了 2255 01:39:29,375 --> 01:39:32,458 鄙人有一句话不知道当讲不当讲 2256 01:39:32,541 --> 01:39:33,000 快说! 2257 01:39:34,541 --> 01:39:36,250 一个男人的一张脸 2258 01:39:36,916 --> 01:39:38,208 一个婴儿的一张脸 2259 01:39:38,291 --> 01:39:39,583 接在一起慈祥 2260 01:39:40,041 --> 01:39:41,500 一个男人的一张脸 2261 01:39:41,625 --> 01:39:44,041 接一个光屁股的女人 2262 01:39:44,333 --> 01:39:44,750 流氓 2263 01:39:44,916 --> 01:39:47,375 所以马走日那张狰狞的脸 2264 01:39:47,458 --> 01:39:49,375 接上一个断头女人 2265 01:39:49,458 --> 01:39:51,125 他就是杀完颜英 2266 01:39:52,250 --> 01:39:54,208 办大事儿还得需要搞艺术的! 2267 01:39:55,041 --> 01:39:56,000 如此这般 2268 01:39:56,125 --> 01:39:58,166 杀完颜在观众看来 2269 01:39:58,458 --> 01:39:59,291 他是有的! 2270 01:39:59,500 --> 01:40:01,958 所以枪毙马走日 2271 01:40:02,125 --> 01:40:03,125 要么你来要么我来! 2272 01:40:03,416 --> 01:40:05,166 两根儿柱子都有了 2273 01:40:05,416 --> 01:40:07,208 历史依然可以改变 2274 01:40:07,750 --> 01:40:08,708 那就敬武六小姐 2275 01:40:08,791 --> 01:40:09,500 敬我姐! 2276 01:40:09,583 --> 01:40:10,291 死去吧 2277 01:40:10,500 --> 01:40:11,083 谁死去? 2278 01:40:11,250 --> 01:40:11,750 你们 2279 01:40:12,041 --> 01:40:12,708 我们? 2280 01:40:12,833 --> 01:40:13,458 你们仨 2281 01:40:13,708 --> 01:40:14,250 我们仨? 2282 01:40:14,333 --> 01:40:15,833 你们仨都死去吧 2283 01:40:16,791 --> 01:40:19,875 您这是发的哪门子火儿啊武小姐 2284 01:40:20,000 --> 01:40:22,000 马走日刚说自己没杀人 2285 01:40:22,333 --> 01:40:23,625 你们就在这里商量 2286 01:40:23,666 --> 01:40:24,750 怎么把他枪毙了 2287 01:40:25,041 --> 01:40:26,583 我记得前两天问您 2288 01:40:26,666 --> 01:40:28,416 是真枪毙还是假枪毙 2289 01:40:28,916 --> 01:40:30,500 你可说的是真毙! 2290 01:40:30,833 --> 01:40:32,083 这话是我说的没假 2291 01:40:32,333 --> 01:40:33,250 可是我还说了 2292 01:40:33,458 --> 01:40:34,916 真杀人才能真枪毙 2293 01:40:35,000 --> 01:40:37,041 枪毙他也是观众的呼声! 2294 01:40:37,125 --> 01:40:37,666 你说什么? 2295 01:40:37,833 --> 01:40:40,083 你总不能让观众也闭嘴吧? 2296 01:40:41,791 --> 01:40:42,500 你跟谁说话呢 2297 01:40:42,958 --> 01:40:43,791 不是我是跟… 2298 01:40:43,875 --> 01:40:44,916 跟谁说话呢! 2299 01:40:45,000 --> 01:40:45,458 站起来 2300 01:40:45,750 --> 01:40:46,041 啊? 2301 01:40:46,125 --> 01:40:46,750 站起来 2302 01:40:52,875 --> 01:40:53,583 站直喽! 2303 01:40:54,666 --> 01:40:55,125 姐 2304 01:40:55,875 --> 01:40:58,166 为了一个马走日不值当的呀! 2305 01:40:58,375 --> 01:40:59,625 要不是马走日 2306 01:41:00,625 --> 01:41:03,500 项警官那天早就在马厩里… 2307 01:41:03,916 --> 01:41:04,916 变成猴了! 2308 01:41:10,583 --> 01:41:15,750 滚!都给我滚! (安南语l 2309 01:41:16,166 --> 01:41:17,958 看说胡话了吧 2310 01:41:18,958 --> 01:41:21,833 我是怕他们偷听咱们说人话 2311 01:41:22,166 --> 01:41:23,208 像您这身份 2312 01:41:23,291 --> 01:41:24,916 一般都喜欢逛逛戏园子 2313 01:41:25,000 --> 01:41:26,458 捧个老生小生的 2314 01:41:26,625 --> 01:41:27,583 您可倒好 2315 01:41:27,791 --> 01:41:29,500 喜欢逛个巡捕房 2316 01:41:29,708 --> 01:41:30,791 这也没什么问题 2317 01:41:30,875 --> 01:41:33,000 可您不能捧男犯人吧 2318 01:41:33,083 --> 01:41:34,250 项飞田 2319 01:41:34,541 --> 01:41:35,916 官升得太快了 2320 01:41:36,083 --> 01:41:37,666 说话都敢带刺儿了! 2321 01:41:37,750 --> 01:41:38,833 咱都不慢呐! 2322 01:41:39,041 --> 01:41:40,666 感谢大清亡了国嘛 2323 01:41:40,958 --> 01:41:42,541 咱都是暴发户! 2324 01:41:42,625 --> 01:41:43,541 1尔, 葫人 2325 01:41:43,833 --> 01:41:45,250 环感谢大清亡了国? 2326 01:41:45,333 --> 01:41:47,666 哎!我现在是法国人 2327 01:41:48,000 --> 01:41:48,791 布鲁诺,项 2328 01:41:49,000 --> 01:41:50,708 让·皮埃尔不在的时候 2329 01:41:51,041 --> 01:41:52,250 法租界这地儿 2330 01:41:52,583 --> 01:41:53,416 我说了算! 2331 01:41:54,000 --> 01:41:55,333 马走B说毙就毙! 2332 01:41:57,458 --> 01:41:58,416 谁不在 2333 01:41:59,083 --> 01:42:00,291 你也做不了主 2334 01:42:00,916 --> 01:42:02,375 刚才你说我是暴发户 2335 01:42:03,000 --> 01:42:03,791 那弘今天 2336 01:42:03,958 --> 01:42:05,416 就,点儿暴发户该干的事儿 2337 01:42:05,500 --> 01:42:06,125 让你瞧瞧 2338 01:42:06,416 --> 01:42:07,208 胶片我带走I 2339 01:42:07,666 --> 01:42:08,708 马走日我也带走 2340 01:42:09,041 --> 01:42:10,166 谁也别想枪毙他! 2341 01:42:10,333 --> 01:42:11,458 引渡到沪军署去 2342 01:42:11,625 --> 01:42:13,166 你爸爸的事儿你也做主? 2343 01:42:15,166 --> 01:42:15,875 我还就… 2344 01:42:16,625 --> 01:42:17,500 做主了! 2345 01:42:21,000 --> 01:42:22,666 那也得依靠.去律吧 2346 01:42:22,875 --> 01:42:24,458 依靠律师吧开开庭吧 2347 01:42:24,583 --> 01:42:25,208 砸了 2348 01:42:25,416 --> 01:42:26,250 玩砸了 2349 01:42:26,375 --> 01:42:28,666 电影儿没拍成马走日也毙不了了 2350 01:42:28,875 --> 01:42:31,083 毙不毙马走日就看你想不想 2351 01:42:32,750 --> 01:42:34,250 我哪儿有那么大本事啊? 2352 01:42:34,500 --> 01:42:35,166 有啊 2353 01:42:35,291 --> 01:42:37,625 妇人之仁对你姐姐来说 2354 01:42:37,875 --> 01:42:38,375 正常 2355 01:42:38,791 --> 01:42:39,125 出去 2356 01:42:39,208 --> 01:42:39,916 哎好的 2357 01:42:40,125 --> 01:42:40,875 大义灭亲 2358 01:42:40,958 --> 01:42:42,291 对我采说正常 2359 01:42:42,416 --> 01:42:43,500 时势造英雄 2360 01:42:43,625 --> 01:42:45,000 对你来说正好 2361 01:42:45,875 --> 01:42:47,583 看你想不想当这英雄了 2362 01:42:48,375 --> 01:42:48,708 当啊 2363 01:42:49,458 --> 01:42:51,833 当英雄就必须得毙了马走日? 2364 01:42:52,083 --> 01:42:54,375 枪毙马走日不是个人恩怨 2365 01:42:55,041 --> 01:42:57,208 是时势要毙他人心要毙他 2366 01:42:57,416 --> 01:42:58,875 而且已经毙了两年了 2367 01:42:58,958 --> 01:43:01,083 现在就看你是不是顺势而为 2368 01:43:01,416 --> 01:43:02,666 替大家毙了他 2369 01:43:02,791 --> 01:43:04,708 你枪毙的不是马走B 2370 01:43:05,250 --> 01:43:06,083 是民愤! 2371 01:43:06,166 --> 01:43:07,375 我懂了懂了 2372 01:43:07,666 --> 01:43:10,750 武家一门要出俩大帅了 2373 01:43:13,625 --> 01:43:15,500 马走日! 2374 01:43:16,000 --> 01:43:18,750 这两年外面嚷嚷要枪毙那个人 2375 01:43:19,625 --> 01:43:20,458 叫马走日 2376 01:43:20,875 --> 01:43:21,583 是一个人吗? 2377 01:43:21,666 --> 01:43:22,750 对就是他 2378 01:43:23,500 --> 01:43:24,416 他是冤枉的 2379 01:43:25,125 --> 01:43:27,291 我想请你把他引渡过来重新审审 2380 01:43:27,375 --> 01:43:29,291 哎!这是两个国家的问题 2381 01:43:29,541 --> 01:43:30,750 爸爸一个人说了不算 2382 01:43:30,875 --> 01:43:32,291 你必须得说了算! 2383 01:43:32,708 --> 01:43:34,083 你不是大帅吗? 2384 01:43:34,708 --> 01:43:35,750 真正的大帅 2385 01:43:36,208 --> 01:43:37,833 不仅能随便冤枉一个人 2386 01:43:38,416 --> 01:43:40,625 更能随便不冤枉一个人 2387 01:43:43,625 --> 01:43:43,958 来人! 2388 01:43:44,041 --> 01:43:44,375 有! 2389 01:43:45,416 --> 01:43:47,250 你记一下到法国警署 2390 01:43:47,375 --> 01:43:48,416 把那个… 2391 01:43:48,500 --> 01:43:49,083 马走日! 2392 01:43:49,166 --> 01:43:50,000 马走日 2393 01:43:50,458 --> 01:43:51,208 给俺弄过来 2394 01:43:51,625 --> 01:43:52,333 留着活的啊! 2395 01:43:52,416 --> 01:43:52,750 是! 2396 01:43:54,583 --> 01:43:55,000 还有 2397 01:43:56,125 --> 01:43:57,583 你能不娶小老婆了吗? 2398 01:43:57,791 --> 01:43:58,250 怎么啦? 2399 01:43:58,416 --> 01:43:59,166 丢人! 2400 01:43:59,583 --> 01:44:01,208 那些法国人就拿这种事儿 2401 01:44:01,291 --> 01:44:02,583 来奚落我们笑话我们 2402 01:44:02,750 --> 01:44:04,208 他们那是妒忌 2403 01:44:04,416 --> 01:44:06,125 一嘴的科学民主 2404 01:44:06,375 --> 01:44:07,875 一肚子的男盗女娼 2405 01:44:08,125 --> 01:44:10,291 人家面儿上总是过得去吧 2406 01:44:10,375 --> 01:44:11,000 什么是面儿? 2407 01:44:11,250 --> 01:44:12,416 没有里子哪有面儿? 2408 01:44:12,958 --> 01:44:14,291 里子就是本事 2409 01:44:14,458 --> 01:44:16,833 你的本事就是拍好电影 2410 01:44:17,000 --> 01:44:18,375 当个电影艺术家 2411 01:44:18,625 --> 01:44:19,791 我在外边儿喝酒 2412 01:44:19,916 --> 01:44:20,916 很有面子! 2413 01:44:21,208 --> 01:44:23,041 好让你多娶几个小老婆 2414 01:44:23,125 --> 01:44:24,208 你咋又说这事儿了! 2415 01:44:24,791 --> 01:44:26,708 啊今天你说 2416 01:44:27,250 --> 01:44:28,291 我答应你一件事儿 2417 01:44:28,458 --> 01:44:29,416 是马走日 2418 01:44:29,750 --> 01:44:30,625 还是小老婆 2419 01:44:30,833 --> 01:44:31,291 你选! 2420 01:44:33,250 --> 01:44:33,708 马走日 2421 01:44:33,916 --> 01:44:34,208 好! 2422 01:44:34,541 --> 01:44:35,125 我同意! 2423 01:44:35,833 --> 01:44:36,291 你坐下 2424 01:44:38,708 --> 01:44:39,541 小六子 2425 01:44:41,250 --> 01:44:42,208 俺老了 2426 01:44:43,083 --> 01:44:44,041 你也长大了 2427 01:44:47,375 --> 01:44:49,458 俺有几句心里话 2428 01:44:49,708 --> 01:44:50,708 也该跟你 2429 01:44:51,041 --> 01:44:51,833 说说啦 2430 01:44:52,708 --> 01:44:53,708 你爸爸的心 2431 01:44:53,916 --> 01:44:56,125 永远在你妈妈的肚子里 2432 01:44:57,208 --> 01:44:59,375 你以为俺喜欢小老婆 2433 01:44:59,666 --> 01:45:00,208 不对! 2434 01:45:00,833 --> 01:45:01,708 我不是色鬼! 2435 01:45:03,083 --> 01:45:03,958 你说你说 2436 01:45:04,291 --> 01:45:05,958 小老婆你不娶来 2437 01:45:06,833 --> 01:45:07,791 别人就娶走了 2438 01:45:08,083 --> 01:45:09,125 别的大帅娶走 2439 01:45:09,541 --> 01:45:11,958 就会对他们形成新的力量 2440 01:45:12,250 --> 01:45:13,833 对我们形成新的威胁 2441 01:45:14,708 --> 01:45:15,916 爸爸九死一生 2442 01:45:16,333 --> 01:45:17,416 就是为了这个家! 2443 01:45:18,500 --> 01:45:19,250 为了你们 2444 01:45:19,708 --> 01:45:21,000 娶多少小老婆 2445 01:45:22,375 --> 01:45:23,291 俺都不后悔! 2446 01:45:23,791 --> 01:45:24,958 这是俺的战略 2447 01:45:25,583 --> 01:45:26,875 你听明白了没有? 2448 01:45:30,166 --> 01:45:31,000 马走日… 2449 01:45:31,666 --> 01:45:32,416 别忘了! 2450 01:45:33,708 --> 01:45:34,375 姓名 2451 01:45:34,791 --> 01:45:35,750 姓竖弯 2452 01:45:36,333 --> 01:45:36,958 名钩儿 2453 01:45:37,333 --> 01:45:38,125 Swan Girl 2454 01:45:38,625 --> 01:45:40,291 美国老师给我起的名字 2455 01:45:40,750 --> 01:45:41,708 天鹅姑娘 2456 01:45:42,125 --> 01:45:44,291 中国人一叫就变成了竖弯钩儿 2457 01:45:44,583 --> 01:45:46,458 于是他们叫我钩儿姐 2458 01:45:46,750 --> 01:45:47,208 年龄 2459 01:45:47,958 --> 01:45:49,000 二十…二 2460 01:45:50,750 --> 01:45:51,208 学历 2461 01:45:51,333 --> 01:45:53,166 复旦外文系学士 2462 01:45:53,333 --> 01:45:54,166 怎么干上这个了 2463 01:45:54,458 --> 01:45:55,291 学以致用 2464 01:45:55,791 --> 01:45:56,666 这你都问过 2465 01:45:57,041 --> 01:45:58,000 例行公事 2466 01:45:58,291 --> 01:45:58,875 签个字儿 2467 01:46:01,958 --> 01:46:04,541 马走日已经被缉拿归案 2468 01:46:04,833 --> 01:46:07,666 但是呢这个案情依然疑点重重 2469 01:46:08,208 --> 01:46:10,833 马走日和完颜的关系… 2470 01:46:10,916 --> 01:46:11,375 好 2471 01:46:11,875 --> 01:46:13,333 连坐马桶都手牵手 2472 01:46:13,625 --> 01:46:14,625 好成这样儿 2473 01:46:15,416 --> 01:46:16,958 他能对完颜下得去手吗? 2474 01:46:17,041 --> 01:46:17,750 图财 2475 01:46:18,166 --> 01:46:18,833 而且害命 2476 01:46:19,041 --> 01:46:20,000 死者身上啊 2477 01:46:20,208 --> 01:46:21,125 伤痕累累 2478 01:46:21,250 --> 01:46:22,291 惨不忍睹! 2479 01:46:22,500 --> 01:46:24,208 他会不会有暴力史呢? 2480 01:46:24,541 --> 01:46:25,333 那我不知道 2481 01:46:25,541 --> 01:46:26,416 反正每次来 2482 01:46:26,916 --> 01:46:27,958 暖瓶都掉下来 2483 01:46:29,375 --> 01:46:30,416 暖瓶? 2484 01:46:32,708 --> 01:46:33,750 就是这种暖壶 2485 01:46:34,666 --> 01:46:36,583 砰砰砰!啪! 2486 01:46:37,166 --> 01:46:37,750 碎了! 2487 01:46:39,125 --> 01:46:40,416 马走日一去隔壁 2488 01:46:40,583 --> 01:46:41,750 这暖壶就碎五个 2489 01:46:45,166 --> 01:46:46,166 都发生什么了? 2490 01:46:47,000 --> 01:46:47,833 各种晌动 2491 01:46:49,166 --> 01:46:50,125 还有叫声 2492 01:46:51,458 --> 01:46:52,291 叫声? 2493 01:46:53,958 --> 01:46:54,708 惨吗? 2494 01:46:55,000 --> 01:46:55,958 不是一般地惨! 2495 01:46:57,125 --> 01:46:57,958 就在隔壁? 2496 01:46:58,833 --> 01:46:59,666 就在隔壁! 2497 01:47:02,958 --> 01:47:03,750 墙的那边儿… 2498 01:47:04,875 --> 01:47:05,666 就是暖壶 2499 01:47:05,958 --> 01:47:07,708 那边儿就是暖壶? 2500 01:47:07,791 --> 01:47:08,125 对 2501 01:47:10,458 --> 01:47:11,833 有这么大动静儿吗? 2502 01:47:11,916 --> 01:47:12,375 有 2503 01:47:12,833 --> 01:47:13,875 有这么大动静儿吗? 2504 01:47:13,958 --> 01:47:14,291 有 2505 01:47:14,583 --> 01:47:15,208 有这么大动静儿? 2506 01:47:15,333 --> 01:47:15,666 有 2507 01:47:16,333 --> 01:47:18,291 哪有这么大动静儿啊! 2508 01:47:18,375 --> 01:47:22,041 我怎么觉得没有这么大动静儿啊! 2509 01:47:24,708 --> 01:47:26,416 项飞田… 2510 01:47:26,833 --> 01:47:29,916 这不算完!!! 2511 01:47:30,791 --> 01:47:32,666 又是马走日? 2512 01:47:32,958 --> 01:47:34,041 引渡马走日 2513 01:47:34,291 --> 01:47:37,208 是咱们远东布局重要的一步 2514 01:47:38,541 --> 01:47:41,666 您最近要娶白俄女公爵卡捷琳娜对吧 2515 01:47:42,041 --> 01:47:42,916 其实我知道 2516 01:47:43,083 --> 01:47:47,083 您看重的是她欧洲皇室远亲背景 2517 01:47:47,541 --> 01:47:51,291 联姻之后您就不只是上海王了 2518 01:47:51,791 --> 01:47:54,666 我们把马走日从法国人手里弄回来 2519 01:47:55,000 --> 01:47:57,333 在白俄面前我们有了颜面 2520 01:47:57,750 --> 01:47:58,833 娶了卡捷琳娜 2521 01:47:59,166 --> 01:48:01,541 在法国人面前我们也有了颜面 2522 01:48:01,708 --> 01:48:02,916 最重要的是 2523 01:48:03,041 --> 01:48:05,541 马走日一案民愤极大 2524 01:48:05,833 --> 01:48:07,625 我们把他弄回来毙了 2525 01:48:08,875 --> 01:48:10,958 您赢得了人心 2526 01:48:11,500 --> 01:48:13,166 一箭三雕! 2527 01:48:16,208 --> 01:48:18,291 你们都查清楚 2528 01:48:18,416 --> 01:48:21,166 马走日真杀了人? 2529 01:48:22,041 --> 01:48:22,458 爸! 2530 01:48:23,166 --> 01:48:25,541 他杀没杀人这件事儿很重要吗? 2531 01:48:27,833 --> 01:48:28,291 我… 2532 01:48:29,291 --> 01:48:30,583 就一个担心 2533 01:48:31,166 --> 01:48:31,500 嗯? 2534 01:48:32,625 --> 01:48:33,208 我姐 2535 01:48:33,708 --> 01:48:35,208 她跟马走日 2536 01:48:35,541 --> 01:48:38,458 确确实实是有事儿 2537 01:48:39,125 --> 01:48:39,708 老七 2538 01:48:40,958 --> 01:48:42,041 做大事 2539 01:48:42,625 --> 01:48:43,875 不要顾虑女人! 2540 01:48:47,791 --> 01:48:49,000 Hello? Bonjiur? (你好?l 2541 01:48:49,125 --> 01:48:50,208 崩什么如啊我 2542 01:48:50,333 --> 01:48:52,125 呵哈哈哈武七少帅 2543 01:48:53,291 --> 01:48:55,375 人证、物证都力瓷实了 2544 01:48:55,500 --> 01:48:56,958 我爹、我姐也瓷实了 2545 01:48:57,375 --> 01:48:58,125 引渡怎么样了? 2546 01:48:58,666 --> 01:49:01,375 上海的中外报馆本人都亲自邀请 2547 01:49:02,958 --> 01:49:04,416 我只有一个担心啊 2548 01:49:05,250 --> 01:49:06,458 太过张扬 2549 01:49:06,625 --> 01:49:07,625 人多嘴杂 2550 01:49:07,958 --> 01:49:09,375 容易把你姐也捎上 2551 01:49:09,458 --> 01:49:11,833 招不来风那叫什,+大树啊 2552 01:49:12,000 --> 01:49:14,291 既然场面儿搞那么大 2553 01:49:14,541 --> 01:49:15,875 咱就把它拍下来 2554 01:49:16,000 --> 01:49:17,833 到时候马走日被毙 2555 01:49:18,291 --> 01:49:19,250 也能真拍 2556 01:49:19,375 --> 01:49:19,958 引渡 2557 01:49:20,333 --> 01:49:20,958 枪毙 2558 01:49:21,375 --> 01:49:21,958 电影 2559 01:49:22,541 --> 01:49:24,750 这仨鸟一块儿打死? 2560 01:49:24,833 --> 01:49:25,625 论谋略 2561 01:49:25,833 --> 01:49:26,791 你胜过大帅 2562 01:49:27,625 --> 01:49:28,333 拍电影儿 2563 01:49:28,416 --> 01:49:29,583 你超过你姐 2564 01:49:29,666 --> 01:49:31,500 论坏我远不及你 2565 01:49:32,625 --> 01:49:33,208 我坏吗? 2566 01:49:33,333 --> 01:49:33,958 坏呀! 2567 01:49:34,041 --> 01:49:37,541 我这张脸谁能相信我是坏人办坏事? 2568 01:49:37,875 --> 01:49:40,416 那不像马走日天生一副坏人样儿 2569 01:49:40,500 --> 01:49:41,458 命中该死 2570 01:49:42,375 --> 01:49:44,208 这些日子没人儿理我 2571 01:49:44,291 --> 01:49:46,166 他们都干吗去了 2572 01:49:47,250 --> 01:49:50,541 唉有些个事情啊不知道也好 2573 01:49:51,083 --> 01:49:53,791 因为您想知道他也知道不了 2574 01:49:55,000 --> 01:49:57,583 砸了电影的场子让。路易生气了 2575 01:49:57,916 --> 01:49:59,083 他要毙了你 2576 01:49:59,333 --> 01:50:01,125 好在引渡到大帅那儿 2577 01:50:01,333 --> 01:50:02,416 明天引渡 2578 01:50:02,750 --> 01:50:03,958 你千万别这德行 2579 01:50:04,333 --> 01:50:06,541 到了那边别的我不敢保证 2580 01:50:07,208 --> 01:50:08,750 至少不会让你冤死 2581 01:50:09,083 --> 01:50:11,208 但是你明天千万不能喊冤啊 2582 01:50:11,291 --> 01:50:12,166 记者都在 2583 01:50:12,541 --> 01:50:14,250 我们家老爷子呢好热闹 2584 01:50:14,583 --> 01:50:16,000 你得说点儿开心的话 2585 01:50:16,333 --> 01:50:17,750 但是也不能太开心 2586 01:50:18,000 --> 01:50:18,458 嗯… 2587 01:50:19,208 --> 01:50:20,458 我也得提醒你啊 2588 01:50:21,166 --> 01:50:23,500 引渡是国与国之间的大事儿 2589 01:50:23,875 --> 01:50:25,125 法国人喜欢浪漫 2590 01:50:25,333 --> 01:50:26,625 但你也不能太浪 2591 01:50:26,750 --> 01:50:28,875 马走日说话记得用脑袋说 2592 01:50:29,208 --> 01:50:30,041 不要用嘴说 2593 01:50:38,958 --> 01:50:39,958 你这条好腿… 2594 01:50:40,416 --> 01:50:40,875 疼吗? 2595 01:50:41,791 --> 01:50:42,500 疼啊! 2596 01:50:42,916 --> 01:50:43,708 疼你就记得 2597 01:50:43,958 --> 01:50:45,125 该说什么不该说什么 2598 01:50:45,416 --> 01:50:46,000 别吹牛! 2599 01:51:04,708 --> 01:51:06,083 敬礼! 2600 01:51:06,958 --> 01:51:11,916 大帅大好!大帅大好!大帅大好! 2601 01:52:13,625 --> 01:52:16,416 Meodames et Messieurs! (女士们、先生们) 2602 01:52:16,500 --> 01:52:17,833 Today! 2603 01:52:18,458 --> 01:52:22,416 Today is history! 2604 01:52:22,833 --> 01:52:27,333 Today we make nistory! 2605 01:52:27,625 --> 01:52:33,583 And today we are a part of history! 2606 01:52:34,500 --> 01:52:35,916 引渡是假 2607 01:52:36,083 --> 01:52:37,416 偷情是真 2608 01:52:37,791 --> 01:52:40,958 大帅女情陷奸杀犯 2609 01:52:41,166 --> 01:52:43,958 武大帅询私救爱婿! 2610 01:52:44,166 --> 01:52:44,750 啊呸! 2611 01:52:44,916 --> 01:52:46,916 我是全上海最后一个知道这事儿的吧! 2612 01:52:47,000 --> 01:52:49,125 俺才是上海最后知道这事儿的! 2613 01:52:49,208 --> 01:52:51,500 你就是一个长着胡子的娘们儿 2614 01:52:51,666 --> 01:52:52,000 你! 2615 01:52:52,500 --> 01:52:53,041 你坐下 2616 01:52:54,000 --> 01:52:55,166 俺又不是你儿子 2617 01:52:55,333 --> 01:52:56,375 你就是我儿子 2618 01:52:56,458 --> 01:52:57,416 那他是你孙子! 2619 01:52:57,500 --> 01:52:58,666 我是什么重要吗? 2620 01:52:58,875 --> 01:53:01,708 咱们引渡不就是为了显示咱们的实力吗 2621 01:53:01,916 --> 01:53:02,375 现在好 2622 01:53:02,541 --> 01:53:04,666 全世界人都在看咱们的笑话 2623 01:53:04,916 --> 01:53:06,000 你那婚礼我不去了! 2624 01:53:06,250 --> 01:53:07,458 早知道是这样的话 2625 01:53:07,666 --> 01:53:09,250 我一个小老婆都不会让你娶的! 2626 01:53:09,375 --> 01:53:10,583 覃老师 2627 01:53:13,625 --> 01:53:16,083 没有新娘不能没有你 2628 01:53:17,083 --> 01:53:19,000 明天我让上海的报纸 2629 01:53:19,250 --> 01:53:20,375 统一辟谣! 2630 01:53:20,583 --> 01:53:22,166 侬脑筋有毛病啊侬! 2631 01:53:22,250 --> 01:53:23,416 这就等于造谣! 2632 01:53:23,500 --> 01:53:24,375 你说咋办! 2633 01:53:24,458 --> 01:53:25,750 你回去坐下! 2634 01:53:25,791 --> 01:53:26,208 我… 2635 01:53:26,791 --> 01:53:27,250 坐回去! 2636 01:53:28,125 --> 01:53:28,416 去 2637 01:53:28,708 --> 01:53:29,666 将计就计 2638 01:53:29,791 --> 01:53:32,083 他们不是说你要救这个马走日吗? 2639 01:53:32,333 --> 01:53:32,916 咱们… 2640 01:53:33,125 --> 01:53:34,166 就把他给毙了! 2641 01:53:35,625 --> 01:53:36,458 怎么回事儿! 2642 01:53:37,583 --> 01:53:40,083 怎么会把马走日跟马关在一起呢! 2643 01:53:40,166 --> 01:53:42,541 好歹法国人还把他关在人待的地方 2644 01:53:43,583 --> 01:53:45,083 喏你看看… 2645 01:53:49,208 --> 01:53:51,125 这些下三滥的报纸你们也信啊 2646 01:53:51,166 --> 01:53:53,416 我们不信有人会信呀 2647 01:53:53,625 --> 01:53:54,666 信就信呗 2648 01:53:54,958 --> 01:53:57,583 不就是救个人吗有什么大惊小怪的 2649 01:53:58,416 --> 01:53:58,875 爸 2650 01:53:59,500 --> 01:54:00,375 你不是要结婚吗 2651 01:54:00,791 --> 01:54:02,750 大赦天下把所有人都放了 2652 01:54:02,791 --> 01:54:04,000 你这倒是提醒了我 2653 01:54:04,083 --> 01:54:06,416 你去那些小报馆跟他们宣布 2654 01:54:06,416 --> 01:54:08,583 大帅结婚大赦天下 2655 01:54:08,750 --> 01:54:10,458 唯有马走日罪不容恕I 2656 01:54:10,500 --> 01:54:10,958 为什么? 2657 01:54:11,000 --> 01:54:11,958 婚礼以后 2658 01:54:12,250 --> 01:54:13,041 马上枪毙! 2659 01:54:13,125 --> 01:54:13,708 什么意思! 2660 01:54:13,791 --> 01:54:15,583 要以大局为重 2661 01:54:16,000 --> 01:54:16,833 再说了 2662 01:54:16,958 --> 01:54:18,875 你也不会真心喜欢他 2663 01:54:18,916 --> 01:54:19,500 闭嘴! 2664 01:54:20,208 --> 01:54:21,833 你懂什么真喜欢假喜欢的 2665 01:54:22,208 --> 01:54:24,583 妈这个家就不能为我做点儿事儿吗? 2666 01:54:24,875 --> 01:54:26,041 爸那天在这儿 2667 01:54:26,083 --> 01:54:27,666 你可答应我放了马走日的 2668 01:54:27,750 --> 01:54:29,708 哎呀天有不测风云 2669 01:54:29,916 --> 01:54:32,333 云还有瞬息万变呐! 2670 01:54:32,708 --> 01:54:33,166 滚! 2671 01:54:33,458 --> 01:54:34,500 你们俩给我出去 2672 01:54:34,625 --> 01:54:35,458 覃老师! 2673 01:54:35,666 --> 01:54:36,208 出去! 2674 01:54:36,875 --> 01:54:38,208 好听你娘的 2675 01:54:38,500 --> 01:54:39,458 她有学问 2676 01:54:40,541 --> 01:54:41,875 心肝女儿! 2677 01:54:42,333 --> 01:54:42,875 过来 2678 01:54:43,250 --> 01:54:44,208 妈同你讲 2679 01:54:44,500 --> 01:54:45,625 过来呀 2680 01:54:46,291 --> 01:54:49,416 过来坐下来妈跟你有话讲 2681 01:54:51,916 --> 01:54:53,708 你是妈唯一的闺女 2682 01:54:54,250 --> 01:54:56,333 这世上谁都可以害你 2683 01:54:56,458 --> 01:54:59,208 只有娘不会害你 2684 01:55:01,458 --> 01:55:02,791 娘年轻的时候 2685 01:55:03,291 --> 01:55:04,500 也如花似玉哟! 2686 01:55:05,041 --> 01:55:06,333 小腰比你的还细 2687 01:55:06,750 --> 01:55:07,625 一掐就断 2688 01:55:09,000 --> 01:55:11,041 多少翩翩君子求我不得 2689 01:55:11,375 --> 01:55:12,625 可我那时候 2690 01:55:12,958 --> 01:55:16,000 就喜欢那倒霉的忧郁少年 2691 01:55:16,625 --> 01:55:18,125 老想挽救他们 2692 01:55:18,291 --> 01:55:19,666 我爸是忧郁少年吗? 2693 01:55:19,875 --> 01:55:20,916 我可没说你爸 2694 01:55:21,250 --> 01:55:23,125 你爸就是一个粗鲁的武夫! 2695 01:55:23,250 --> 01:55:25,208 可是我怎么落到他手里呢? 2696 01:55:25,583 --> 01:55:26,833 那是我选的! 2697 01:55:26,916 --> 01:55:28,375 他有前途 2698 01:55:28,833 --> 01:55:30,041 有钞票! 2699 01:55:30,541 --> 01:55:31,583 有势力! 2700 01:55:31,750 --> 01:55:33,416 我不是在挑男人 2701 01:55:33,500 --> 01:55:34,708 我是在给你 2702 01:55:34,958 --> 01:55:35,708 挑个爹! 2703 01:55:35,916 --> 01:55:36,375 妈 2704 01:55:36,833 --> 01:55:38,541 您是想让我感谢您吗? 2705 01:55:38,791 --> 01:55:40,250 我可没让您把我生出来 2706 01:55:40,666 --> 01:55:41,500 再说了 2707 01:55:42,333 --> 01:55:44,708 我觉得您这么做根本不值得炫耀 2708 01:55:45,416 --> 01:55:46,583 倒觉得有点儿恶心 2709 01:55:47,833 --> 01:55:48,625 说难听点儿 2710 01:55:48,791 --> 01:55:49,875 就是图慕虚荣而己! 2711 01:55:50,083 --> 01:55:51,291 不是图慕虚荣 2712 01:55:51,500 --> 01:55:52,708 这是自然法则 2713 01:55:52,875 --> 01:55:54,166 《天演论》你看过吗? 2714 01:55:54,291 --> 01:55:55,916 Huxley(赫胥黎l你知道是谁吗? 2715 01:55:55,958 --> 01:55:57,250 那时候大清亡国了吗? 2716 01:55:57,541 --> 01:55:59,958 你怎么知道你老公以后能当上大帅呢 2717 01:56:00,000 --> 01:56:01,791 那是知识给我的眼界呀! 2718 01:56:01,791 --> 01:56:02,666 那你怎么知道 2719 01:56:02,750 --> 01:56:04,458 马走日以后就不能当上大帅呢! 2720 01:56:04,500 --> 01:56:06,041 马走日?呸! 2721 01:56:06,375 --> 01:56:08,583 我认识他比你早三岁看到老 2722 01:56:08,666 --> 01:56:10,833 他根本就是一个没出息的胚子! 2723 01:56:11,291 --> 01:56:11,875 妈… 2724 01:56:13,166 --> 01:56:15,875 您这辈子真心喜欢过谁吗? 2725 01:56:17,375 --> 01:56:19,083 真心喜欢? 2726 01:56:19,125 --> 01:56:21,583 那不就是荷尔蒙一分钟的荡漾吗? 2727 01:56:23,375 --> 01:56:24,625 我就喜欢这么荡着 2728 01:56:25,416 --> 01:56:26,625 我这一分钟啊… 2729 01:56:27,416 --> 01:56:28,458 顶你一辈子! 2730 01:56:28,541 --> 01:56:29,750 你别刺激我 2731 01:56:30,416 --> 01:56:32,458 你这话我都跟我妈说过 2732 01:56:32,916 --> 01:56:33,875 我告诉你 2733 01:56:33,916 --> 01:56:36,458 女人大不了就是选两种男人 2734 01:56:36,541 --> 01:56:38,666 要不然就是官儿大有钱 2735 01:56:39,125 --> 01:56:41,625 要不然就是欲罢不能的 2736 01:56:41,750 --> 01:56:44,666 这马走日是占着哪头了? 2737 01:56:44,833 --> 01:56:46,250 官儿大有钱? 2738 01:56:46,625 --> 01:56:47,541 不会吧? 2739 01:56:47,666 --> 01:56:48,875 欲罢不能吗? 2740 01:56:49,000 --> 01:56:49,875 我就喜欢他 2741 01:56:50,083 --> 01:56:52,500 我就想帮他就看不得他受委屈 2742 01:56:52,625 --> 01:56:54,333 你懂什么叫喜欢吗? 2743 01:56:54,666 --> 01:56:56,250 你连男人你都不懂 2744 01:56:56,625 --> 01:56:58,375 没有过四十个男人 2745 01:56:58,541 --> 01:57:00,750 你怎么有资格谈喜欢 2746 01:57:01,041 --> 01:57:01,958 我告诉你 2747 01:57:02,208 --> 01:57:04,833 对男人的了解是靠量的积累 2748 01:57:05,166 --> 01:57:07,291 就您?还有过四十个男人呐? 2749 01:57:07,458 --> 01:57:08,333 这就是一种比喻! 2750 01:57:08,333 --> 01:57:10,083 四个四十个有什么区别?啊! 2751 01:57:10,208 --> 01:57:10,750 你跟马走日… 2752 01:57:10,833 --> 01:57:11,583 到什么地步了? 2753 01:57:11,875 --> 01:57:12,458 睡过他哇?i 2754 01:57:13,125 --> 01:57:13,875 香过面孔哇?! 2755 01:57:14,000 --> 01:57:14,708 拉过手哇?! 2756 01:57:17,041 --> 01:57:17,666 妈… 2757 01:57:18,666 --> 01:57:19,708 那天也是在这 2758 01:57:20,250 --> 01:57:22,375 我爸跟我说讨小老老婆的战略 2759 01:57:23,416 --> 01:57:25,791 今天你又在这里跟我说找找男人的战术 2760 01:57:26,916 --> 01:57:27,833 你们俩呀… 2761 01:57:28,833 --> 01:57:30,291 真是一丘之貉! 2762 01:57:32,125 --> 01:57:33,708 你想好了再来找我! 2763 01:57:36,333 --> 01:57:37,208 杀个人 2764 01:57:37,458 --> 01:57:38,125 头版 2765 01:57:38,291 --> 01:57:38,958 抓回来 2766 01:57:39,333 --> 01:57:39,875 头版 2767 01:57:39,958 --> 01:57:40,500 引渡 2768 01:57:40,791 --> 01:57:41,708 还是头版! 2769 01:57:42,166 --> 01:57:43,250 明儿才毙您 2770 01:57:43,500 --> 01:57:45,791 今天就把头版给您留出来了! 2771 01:57:46,083 --> 01:57:48,833 还有那么多姑娘总真心惦记着您 2772 01:57:49,041 --> 01:57:49,750 我姐 2773 01:57:50,250 --> 01:57:51,791 我姐就五迷三道的 2774 01:57:52,375 --> 01:57:55,125 我也真心盼着您当我姐夫 2775 01:57:55,208 --> 01:57:56,833 可是没机会了 2776 01:57:56,875 --> 01:57:59,083 您非要奔死了去! 2777 01:57:59,458 --> 01:58:00,375 您看看您 2778 01:58:01,333 --> 01:58:03,291 一张杀人犯的脸 2779 01:58:03,875 --> 01:58:06,791 您但凡长成项警官那路数 2780 01:58:06,916 --> 01:58:08,333 谁看着都喜欢 2781 01:58:08,500 --> 01:58:09,958 说您是杀人犯 2782 01:58:10,333 --> 01:58:12,041 谁信呐! 2783 01:58:13,541 --> 01:58:17,208 默尔济吉特改汉姓非姓马 2784 01:58:17,333 --> 01:58:18,500 还走日! 2785 01:58:18,875 --> 01:58:19,833 别住腿儿了吧 2786 01:58:20,041 --> 01:58:20,750 看人家 2787 01:58:20,875 --> 01:58:24,500 舒穆禄改姓项叫飞田 2788 01:58:24,583 --> 01:58:27,000 人家走一步顶您两步 2789 01:58:27,125 --> 01:58:28,208 俩日! 2790 01:58:28,833 --> 01:58:29,416 四个 2791 01:58:31,125 --> 01:58:31,916 四个吗? 2792 01:58:32,833 --> 01:58:33,541 四个 2793 01:58:33,833 --> 01:58:34,750 讨厌! 2794 01:58:34,875 --> 01:58:36,375 您纠正我干什么呀?! 2795 01:58:36,625 --> 01:58:38,375 您讨厌就讨厌在这儿 2796 01:58:38,541 --> 01:58:40,416 这个时候您纠正我干什么呀? 2797 01:58:40,541 --> 01:58:41,166 啊?! 2798 01:58:44,125 --> 01:58:46,958 我怎么着着您死我那么开心呢! 2799 01:58:47,583 --> 01:58:48,750 有进步啊 2800 01:58:49,666 --> 01:58:50,750 会说“您”了 2801 01:59:02,666 --> 01:59:03,625 诸位好 2802 01:59:03,708 --> 01:59:05,666 今天我们在这里出席 2803 01:59:05,791 --> 01:59:09,458 这位男士和这位女士 2804 01:59:09,541 --> 01:59:11,250 你们俩牧师问你们 2805 01:59:11,583 --> 01:59:13,458 有什么理由要后悔吗? 2806 01:59:13,791 --> 01:59:14,625 你不后悔 2807 01:59:14,708 --> 01:59:15,583 俺就不后悔 2808 01:59:22,166 --> 01:59:23,083 武大年 2809 01:59:23,416 --> 01:59:25,000 您愿意娶卡捷琳娜 2810 01:59:25,333 --> 01:59:26,875 作为你合法的妻子吗? 2811 01:59:27,458 --> 01:59:28,166 俺愿意! 2812 01:59:28,500 --> 01:59:29,333 I Do! 2813 01:59:29,791 --> 01:59:30,958 I Do! 2814 01:59:37,750 --> 01:59:38,333 I Do! 2815 01:59:39,750 --> 01:59:40,708 把戒指给她 2816 01:59:46,833 --> 01:59:49,166 以法律赋予我的权力我宣布 2817 01:59:49,208 --> 01:59:51,583 你们已经成为合法的夫妻啦! 2818 01:59:52,333 --> 01:59:52,875 亲她 2819 01:59:54,291 --> 01:59:55,208 亲嘴! 2820 02:00:07,750 --> 02:00:09,208 哎!闺女! 2821 02:00:23,666 --> 02:00:26,166 大伙儿听着这是俺们家老六 2822 02:00:26,291 --> 02:00:27,833 俺们给大家唱个歌 2823 02:03:57,083 --> 02:03:57,791 敬礼! 2824 02:03:59,750 --> 02:04:01,125 去给他换上 2825 02:04:12,875 --> 02:04:13,666 我要把他带走 2826 02:04:14,083 --> 02:04:14,875 可以! 2827 02:04:15,291 --> 02:04:16,250 你不会有麻烦吗? 2828 02:04:17,375 --> 02:04:18,125 有麻烦! 2829 02:04:27,666 --> 02:04:29,166 这样才不会有麻烦! 2830 02:04:30,083 --> 02:04:30,708 快走! 2831 02:04:36,041 --> 02:04:36,750 武六小姐 2832 02:04:36,875 --> 02:04:38,458 你不是要把我骗到哪儿去枪毙吧 2833 02:04:38,791 --> 02:04:40,500 马走日你真是马狗日 2834 02:04:40,583 --> 02:04:41,625 我想毙你早就毙了 2835 02:04:41,875 --> 02:04:42,416 快开! 2836 02:04:52,166 --> 02:04:52,916 武六 2837 02:04:53,750 --> 02:04:55,458 你把车停下来 2838 02:04:55,750 --> 02:04:58,333 一切都好商量 2839 02:04:58,833 --> 02:05:00,291 没什么好商量的! 2840 02:05:00,458 --> 02:05:02,041 你没有一句实话 2841 02:05:02,125 --> 02:05:03,541 是被你骗大的! 2842 02:05:03,791 --> 02:05:05,750 今天这事儿就是被你逼的! 2843 02:05:05,875 --> 02:05:07,083 你说什么呢 2844 02:05:07,125 --> 02:05:08,625 你妈我一辈子 2845 02:05:08,750 --> 02:05:11,333 为人师表桃李满天下 2846 02:05:11,416 --> 02:05:13,958 我就是骗人我也不会骗你呀! 2847 02:05:14,000 --> 02:05:15,458 你偷看我日记 2848 02:05:15,833 --> 02:05:18,333 把喜欢我的男同学全都开除了 2849 02:05:19,208 --> 02:05:21,833 居然还告诉我说他们自己转走的 2850 02:05:22,666 --> 02:05:23,750 我告诉你吧 2851 02:05:23,875 --> 02:05:26,666 那些日记啊我是写给你看的 2852 02:05:26,875 --> 02:05:28,791 我讨厌谁我就写谁 2853 02:05:29,083 --> 02:05:31,375 就是希望你把他们全都弄走 2854 02:05:31,458 --> 02:05:33,583 那你还说我是骗子 2855 02:05:33,708 --> 02:05:35,666 这些都是跟你学的 2856 02:05:35,875 --> 02:05:37,666 你这个没良心的 2857 02:05:37,833 --> 02:05:39,833 我白跟你掏心窝子啦! 2858 02:05:40,125 --> 02:05:42,458 妈您的心没白掏 2859 02:05:42,750 --> 02:05:44,416 您那男人全都白找啦 2860 02:05:44,500 --> 02:05:45,791 您那四十个男人啊 2861 02:05:45,875 --> 02:05:47,208 全都白找啦! 2862 02:05:47,458 --> 02:05:49,625 你的老婆有过四十个男的! 2863 02:05:49,666 --> 02:05:51,250 你老婆才有过四十个男人呢! 2864 02:05:51,500 --> 02:05:53,375 你怎么不跟我学点儿好 2865 02:05:53,416 --> 02:05:55,875 昨天晚上是不是去找马走目了? 2866 02:05:55,916 --> 02:05:57,916 那儿的宪兵都告诉我啦 2867 02:05:57,958 --> 02:05:59,541 我是去找他了 2868 02:05:59,666 --> 02:06:01,083 可是我没睡他 2869 02:06:01,291 --> 02:06:02,958 因为我爱他i 2870 02:06:04,041 --> 02:06:05,833 人家都没搭理你 2871 02:06:06,541 --> 02:06:07,500 我告诉你 2872 02:06:07,791 --> 02:06:09,250 想找找不成 2873 02:06:09,583 --> 02:06:10,916 这才叫丢脸呐! 2874 02:06:11,458 --> 02:06:13,291 我给你最后一次机会 2875 02:06:13,375 --> 02:06:14,666 你把车停下来 2876 02:06:14,791 --> 02:06:16,416 我什么都答应你 2877 02:06:17,000 --> 02:06:19,750 那马走日是什么下三滥 2878 02:06:20,458 --> 02:06:21,666 他找了个舞女 2879 02:06:21,875 --> 02:06:23,458 还把舞女给杀了! 2880 02:06:24,791 --> 02:06:25,875 你跟他好 2881 02:06:26,000 --> 02:06:27,916 早晚有一天他也把你 2882 02:06:28,125 --> 02:06:28,666 给杀掉! 2883 02:06:28,750 --> 02:06:29,958 我能让她们不说话吗? 2884 02:06:30,458 --> 02:06:31,958 我能让她们不说话吗? 2885 02:06:32,125 --> 02:06:32,916 你想打死你妈? 2886 02:06:33,166 --> 02:06:34,666 我想打喇叭让她们闭嘴 2887 02:06:34,708 --> 02:06:35,250 打得准吗? 2888 02:06:35,708 --> 02:06:36,166 不准 2889 02:06:36,625 --> 02:06:37,166 瞄准你妈 2890 02:06:37,208 --> 02:06:38,666 那万一打着她怎么办? 2891 02:06:38,708 --> 02:06:40,416 越瞄准你妈你妈越安全 2892 02:06:41,916 --> 02:06:42,250 不行 2893 02:06:42,333 --> 02:06:42,541 啊? 2894 02:06:42,625 --> 02:06:43,791 后面有一辆车拦着 2895 02:06:44,583 --> 02:06:45,375 正好可以试试 2896 02:06:45,916 --> 02:06:46,500 瞄准司机 2897 02:06:46,875 --> 02:06:47,333 开枪! 2898 02:06:48,583 --> 02:06:49,291 车没了 2899 02:06:49,375 --> 02:06:49,791 我看见了! 2900 02:06:49,875 --> 02:06:50,333 我打中了! 2901 02:06:50,416 --> 02:06:51,333 没打中司机 2902 02:06:51,583 --> 02:06:52,583 你打中机器盖子了 2903 02:06:52,666 --> 02:06:53,250 瞄准你妈 2904 02:06:53,541 --> 02:06:54,458 二 三 2905 02:06:56,500 --> 02:06:57,125 你妈还在吗? 2906 02:06:57,166 --> 02:06:59,000 我妈还在喇叭打没啦! 2907 02:06:59,500 --> 02:07:00,291 接着接着打 2908 02:07:00,375 --> 02:07:02,208 妈跟你说过回头是岸 2909 02:07:02,916 --> 02:07:03,208 我现在告诉你 2910 02:07:03,208 --> 02:07:04,541 现在告诉你 2911 02:07:05,125 --> 02:07:05,916 那岸没了 2912 02:07:05,958 --> 02:07:06,791 你妈没发现 2913 02:07:06,916 --> 02:07:07,583 继续打 2914 02:07:07,833 --> 02:07:09,875 妈!你别乱动! 2915 02:07:10,041 --> 02:07:11,208 我瞄不准! 2916 02:07:11,583 --> 02:07:12,125 武六 2917 02:07:12,541 --> 02:07:12,791 快 2918 02:07:12,875 --> 02:07:14,708 你竟敢向你妈开枪 2919 02:07:14,750 --> 02:07:15,625 你妈还说着话呢 2920 02:07:15,708 --> 02:07:15,958 快! 2921 02:07:16,083 --> 02:07:17,333 我告诉你 2922 02:07:17,875 --> 02:07:19,916 我们两个人母女的情分 2923 02:07:20,041 --> 02:07:21,833 就一y3两断啦! 2924 02:07:27,291 --> 02:07:29,625 妈!您打死我吧! 2925 02:07:29,708 --> 02:07:32,083 俺们武家是巾帼不让须眉啊! 2926 02:07:32,333 --> 02:07:33,375 什么意思? 2927 02:07:33,541 --> 02:07:34,875 就是女的厉害 2928 02:07:56,333 --> 02:07:56,958 哎! 2929 02:07:59,416 --> 02:08:00,458 趁你妈没跟上 2930 02:08:00,541 --> 02:08:01,500 你让我自己跑吧 2931 02:08:01,625 --> 02:08:03,458 你回去找你妈赔个不是行吗? 2932 02:08:03,583 --> 02:08:04,291 你找死! 2933 02:08:04,333 --> 02:08:06,166 没听说过娘儿俩真开枪的 2934 02:08:06,208 --> 02:08:07,750 我不值得你对我这么好 2935 02:08:07,791 --> 02:08:08,750 你死去吧! 2936 02:08:09,083 --> 02:08:10,791 你跟你妈都疯了!我跑了! 2937 02:08:11,333 --> 02:08:12,166 回来!不管你们! 2938 02:08:12,791 --> 02:08:13,708 回来!你给我回来! 2939 02:08:14,208 --> 02:08:15,875 你再不回来我就开枪啦! 2940 02:08:16,250 --> 02:08:17,833 我开枪打你啦! 2941 02:08:34,333 --> 02:08:36,666 马走日!醒醒醒醒! 2942 02:08:36,958 --> 02:08:38,166 让你别跑 2943 02:08:39,875 --> 02:08:44,416 我上一回逃跑是因为完颜死了 2944 02:08:45,125 --> 02:08:46,791 我这一回逃跑 2945 02:08:47,083 --> 02:08:50,041 是怕武六再因为我死喽 2946 02:08:51,791 --> 02:08:53,458 你为什么开枪打我! 2947 02:08:53,500 --> 02:08:54,708 我没开枪打你 2948 02:08:54,833 --> 02:08:55,833 你不能死 2949 02:08:56,250 --> 02:08:58,541 你死了还真是以为我把你打死的 2950 02:08:58,791 --> 02:09:00,083 醒醒醒醒! 2951 02:09:00,166 --> 02:09:00,958 你没打我 2952 02:09:01,916 --> 02:09:02,708 我知道 2953 02:09:03,250 --> 02:09:04,208 你是在帮我 2954 02:09:04,583 --> 02:09:05,458 我要喝水 2955 02:09:06,166 --> 02:09:07,208 如果你死了 2956 02:09:07,625 --> 02:09:08,333 我就自杀 2957 02:09:08,875 --> 02:09:10,541 我就开枪把自己打死! 2958 02:09:10,750 --> 02:09:11,875 不要这样做 2959 02:09:12,208 --> 02:09:13,500 你不是这样的人 2960 02:09:14,291 --> 02:09:15,083 完颜! 2961 02:09:15,333 --> 02:09:16,750 我不是完颜 2962 02:09:17,083 --> 02:09:17,791 你不是? 2963 02:09:18,750 --> 02:09:19,666 我知道 2964 02:09:20,000 --> 02:09:20,958 你是武六 2965 02:09:22,416 --> 02:09:23,375 马走日醒醒 2966 02:09:23,416 --> 02:09:24,000 没油了!没油了! 2967 02:09:24,125 --> 02:09:24,916 我知道没油了 2968 02:09:25,291 --> 02:09:26,000 快跑! 2969 02:09:26,166 --> 02:09:26,500 跑? 2970 02:09:26,625 --> 02:09:27,333 跑! 2971 02:09:27,500 --> 02:09:28,375 快跑! 2972 02:09:38,791 --> 02:09:39,500 哎?怎么停了? 2973 02:09:39,666 --> 02:09:40,250 没油啦! 2974 02:09:40,583 --> 02:09:41,208 那怎么办呐? 2975 02:09:41,291 --> 02:09:41,666 我去加! 2976 02:09:41,708 --> 02:09:42,458 都听着! 2977 02:09:42,791 --> 02:09:45,416 我只要一个人撒一泡尿1 2978 02:09:45,708 --> 02:09:47,583 水比油重油比水轻 2979 02:09:47,708 --> 02:09:48,666 这是科学i 2980 02:10:03,541 --> 02:10:04,791 报告队长!没人! 2981 02:10:07,875 --> 02:10:09,125 报告帅母没人! 2982 02:10:11,500 --> 02:10:12,083 武六 2983 02:10:12,791 --> 02:10:13,708 咱俩不会… 2984 02:10:14,166 --> 02:10:15,166 都死了吧? 2985 02:10:17,250 --> 02:10:18,041 你害怕了? 2986 02:10:18,291 --> 02:10:19,000 我… 2987 02:10:19,666 --> 02:10:21,125 早就该死了 2988 02:10:21,333 --> 02:10:22,125 马走日· 2989 02:10:22,666 --> 02:10:24,166 我愿意跟你一起死 2990 02:10:24,750 --> 02:10:25,958 你愿意跟我一起死吗? 2991 02:10:26,250 --> 02:10:27,208 我不愿意 2992 02:10:27,500 --> 02:10:28,625 你还不愿意? 2993 02:10:29,125 --> 02:10:29,958 为什么? 2994 02:10:32,375 --> 02:10:33,041 武六… 2995 02:10:33,791 --> 02:10:34,958 找个男的 2996 02:10:35,250 --> 02:10:37,458 不是为了跟他一块儿死 2997 02:10:37,916 --> 02:10:38,958 找个男人 2998 02:10:40,166 --> 02:10:42,708 是要跟他一块儿好好活! 2999 02:10:42,958 --> 02:10:43,541 马走日 3000 02:10:43,875 --> 02:10:44,666 不要一个人走! 3001 02:10:44,875 --> 02:10:45,625 带我一起走! 3002 02:10:47,416 --> 02:10:49,833 你醒过来干什么呀? 3003 02:10:50,041 --> 02:10:50,500 啊?! 3004 02:10:51,291 --> 02:10:51,875 不然… 3005 02:10:52,458 --> 02:10:54,416 你也不会再挨这么一下子不是! 3006 02:10:55,000 --> 02:10:56,916 我真是对不起你 3007 02:10:57,083 --> 02:10:58,958 但是我有什么办法呢 3008 02:10:59,291 --> 02:11:00,750 别再醒过来了j阿! 3009 02:11:05,458 --> 02:11:06,791 武六再见! 3010 02:11:07,958 --> 02:11:10,791 诸位马走日在此 3011 02:11:11,000 --> 02:11:12,208 枪毙我可以啊! 3012 02:11:12,458 --> 02:11:13,833 别上来抓我! 3013 02:11:14,375 --> 02:11:15,666 谁也别上来抓我! 3014 02:11:16,166 --> 02:11:18,791 武六是被我绑架的! 3015 02:11:19,250 --> 02:11:21,583 我就把她放在风车里头了 3016 02:11:22,041 --> 02:11:23,666 我为什么绑她呀? 3017 02:11:23,958 --> 02:11:25,583 我不是想逃吗? 3018 02:11:25,875 --> 02:11:27,166 我逃哪儿去呀? 3019 02:11:27,458 --> 02:11:28,625 我就逃到这儿 3020 02:11:28,791 --> 02:11:31,291 不都想枪毙马走日吗? 3021 02:11:32,041 --> 02:11:32,500 这儿! 3022 02:11:33,125 --> 02:11:33,833 最好! 3023 02:11:33,958 --> 02:11:35,791 那位说了你有枪 3024 02:11:36,583 --> 02:11:37,791 怎么不自杀呀? 3025 02:11:38,250 --> 02:11:38,583 嘿… 3026 02:11:38,875 --> 02:11:40,583 那多不讲究 3027 02:11:40,916 --> 02:11:43,333 我马走日要么他杀 3028 02:11:43,708 --> 02:11:45,208 我要么杀他 3029 02:11:45,333 --> 02:11:47,375 我怎么能自杀呢?嘿! 3030 02:11:47,708 --> 02:11:48,083 哎! 3031 02:11:49,416 --> 02:11:50,750 什么枪法这是 3032 02:11:51,000 --> 02:11:53,083 有点凉风儿进来了倒是 3033 02:11:53,916 --> 02:11:55,666 我不但对不起武六 3034 02:11:56,333 --> 02:11:58,250 我连武七都对不起! 3035 02:11:58,750 --> 02:11:59,583 武七呀 3036 02:11:59,875 --> 02:12:01,625 把他爸的钱偷出来 3037 02:12:01,916 --> 02:12:03,583 说让我给洗白喽! 3038 02:12:04,083 --> 02:12:04,916 我说行啊! 3039 02:12:05,125 --> 02:12:05,958 都给他花喽! 3040 02:12:06,416 --> 02:12:10,125 说办一个全世界的舞女大赛 3041 02:12:10,583 --> 02:12:12,583 我哪儿找那么多舞女去呀? 3042 02:12:12,833 --> 02:12:15,583 那都是我自己瞎安排的 3043 02:12:16,041 --> 02:12:18,166 那位说了那赛金花呢? 3044 02:12:18,916 --> 02:12:19,833 赛金花… 3045 02:12:20,125 --> 02:12:21,125 嘿!好! 3046 02:12:21,791 --> 02:12:23,583 这是不想听我说了呗 3047 02:12:24,166 --> 02:12:25,875 您倒是打准点儿 3048 02:12:26,416 --> 02:12:27,875 我就闭嘴啦 3049 02:12:28,875 --> 02:12:32,208 按说挨了枪子儿不能说这么多话呀 3050 02:12:32,666 --> 02:12:34,833 可是我没有要死的意思呢? 3051 02:12:35,250 --> 02:12:39,916 您想知道这个赛二爷到底是真是假是吧 3052 02:12:40,625 --> 02:12:41,416 这么说吧 3053 02:12:41,583 --> 02:12:45,083 有没有真的赛二爷我都弄不清楚 3054 02:12:45,458 --> 02:12:46,208 不过啊 3055 02:12:46,666 --> 02:12:48,000 这位大姐 3056 02:12:48,208 --> 02:12:49,583 倒真是好人 3057 02:12:50,083 --> 02:12:51,041 人家跟我说 3058 02:12:51,041 --> 02:12:53,791 小马儿我帮你忙行 3059 02:12:54,208 --> 02:12:56,458 一分钱我都不能要你的 3060 02:12:57,750 --> 02:12:58,958 看看人家 3061 02:12:59,833 --> 02:13:01,583 头发虽是白的 3062 02:13:02,208 --> 02:13:04,041 心却是红的 3063 02:13:04,500 --> 02:13:07,458 说为什么非得枪毙马走日 3064 02:13:07,833 --> 02:13:10,000 我也不知道为什么呀! 3065 02:13:10,208 --> 02:13:12,833 这不都说完颜是我杀的么 3066 02:13:13,125 --> 02:13:15,208 完颜呐还就是我杀的! 3067 02:13:15,625 --> 02:13:16,375 怎么说呢? 3068 02:13:16,416 --> 02:13:18,166 人家当了总统 3069 02:13:18,500 --> 02:13:19,666 想嫁个人 3070 02:13:20,125 --> 02:13:20,708 找我 3071 02:13:20,916 --> 02:13:22,500 我就是不想娶她 3072 02:13:22,875 --> 02:13:23,791 可是啊 3073 02:13:24,041 --> 02:13:27,708 我也没想明白她因为这事儿就死了 3074 02:13:27,958 --> 02:13:30,291 我早知道她想不开能死喽 3075 02:13:30,458 --> 02:13:32,125 我就把她娶了不是? 3076 02:13:32,666 --> 02:13:33,333 诸位! 3077 02:13:33,708 --> 02:13:36,250 有人儿要是想嫁你们的时候 3078 02:13:36,541 --> 02:13:38,000 千万别犹豫 3079 02:13:38,333 --> 02:13:39,166 娶她! 3080 02:13:39,500 --> 02:13:42,750 要不然就得搭两条人命! 3081 02:13:43,041 --> 02:13:45,458 就算活着也活不好! 3082 02:13:45,875 --> 02:13:46,875 那又问啦 3083 02:13:47,958 --> 02:13:50,333 你把完颜绐带出去那天 3084 02:13:50,375 --> 02:13:53,750 到底出什么事了她就算死了呢? 3085 02:13:54,250 --> 02:13:55,458 我跟你说吧 3086 02:13:56,041 --> 02:13:57,083 那天晚上… 3087 02:13:57,541 --> 02:13:57,708 哎! 3088 02:13:57,791 --> 02:13:57,833 哎! 3089 02:13:59,791 --> 02:14:01,208 那天晚上… 3090 02:14:02,708 --> 02:14:04,750 下着大雪呀! 3091 02:14:05,333 --> 02:14:08,458 老佛爷把我叫到她那儿去 3092 02:14:08,750 --> 02:14:10,583 一把给我按到炕头儿上 3093 02:14:11,000 --> 02:14:11,958 说小马儿 3094 02:14:12,500 --> 02:14:13,875 你给我出点儿主意 3095 02:14:14,291 --> 02:14:17,125 我说老佛爷怎么又让我出主意呀? 3096 02:14:33,833 --> 02:14:34,916 嘿嘿嘿! 3097 02:14:35,416 --> 02:14:36,250 回来嘿! 3098 02:14:36,750 --> 02:14:37,583 哎! 3099 02:14:38,333 --> 02:14:39,416 就这么着 3100 02:14:40,000 --> 02:14:42,041 我让人家给枪毙啦! 3101 02:14:42,458 --> 02:14:43,458 据说啊! 3102 02:14:46,083 --> 02:14:49,916 也倒没觉着跟活着有什么不一样 3103 02:14:50,916 --> 02:14:51,833 就是啊… 3104 02:14:52,291 --> 02:14:55,208 不知道后来这武六怎么着了 3105 02:14:55,916 --> 02:14:57,125 拜托诸位 3106 02:14:57,583 --> 02:15:00,041 得空儿帮我打听打听哎! 190938

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