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1
00:00:12,388 --> 00:00:15,472
May I sample the mango mayhem?
2
00:00:17,018 --> 00:00:19,560
Now you're gonna scream
for ice cream,
3
00:00:19,645 --> 00:00:21,061
John wick four!
4
00:00:21,188 --> 00:00:22,771
Actually, it's...
5
00:00:22,898 --> 00:00:24,148
Gelato.
6
00:00:26,777 --> 00:00:29,028
[muffled screaming]
7
00:00:32,324 --> 00:00:35,367
The violence mom won't let me
watch is the best.
8
00:00:35,494 --> 00:00:37,578
- [tires screech]
- [crashing outside]
9
00:00:37,663 --> 00:00:39,204
Damn it!
10
00:00:39,290 --> 00:00:39,997
Whoa.
11
00:00:40,082 --> 00:00:41,540
Live violence!
12
00:00:41,667 --> 00:00:42,499
[marge] homie, wake up.
13
00:00:42,626 --> 00:00:44,376
There's been a car crash!
14
00:00:49,091 --> 00:00:51,216
[yawns] what's happening?
15
00:00:51,343 --> 00:00:53,010
There's been an accident!
16
00:00:53,095 --> 00:00:54,553
Ooh, let's go gawk!
17
00:00:54,638 --> 00:00:56,221
- [grunts]
- yeah! [giggles]
18
00:00:57,558 --> 00:01:01,935
Marge, are you using
a charger cord as a robe belt?
19
00:01:02,063 --> 00:01:04,146
Uh, well, I lost my belt
20
00:01:04,231 --> 00:01:06,815
And bart lost this phone, so...
21
00:01:06,942 --> 00:01:09,151
What's that mark on your sleeve?
22
00:01:09,278 --> 00:01:10,986
I used it as an oven mitt.
23
00:01:11,072 --> 00:01:14,615
My milhouse buys me a new robe
every christmas.
24
00:01:14,700 --> 00:01:16,325
Ralphie bought me
this chenille beauty
25
00:01:16,410 --> 00:01:17,743
With his tooth fairy money.
26
00:01:17,861 --> 00:01:21,205
Don't you like any of the robes
your kids bought you?
27
00:01:21,332 --> 00:01:23,082
They've never bought me a robe.
28
00:01:23,250 --> 00:01:26,460
- The quintessential mom gift!
- [gasps] -un-frigging-believable.
29
00:01:26,545 --> 00:01:27,545
[both groan]
30
00:01:27,630 --> 00:01:29,880
My kids give me homemade gifts,
31
00:01:30,049 --> 00:01:31,799
Like hand turkeys
32
00:01:31,926 --> 00:01:33,842
And macaroni-covered...
33
00:01:33,928 --> 00:01:35,302
[stammers] stuff.
34
00:01:35,429 --> 00:01:38,555
Sounds like they're just
giving you their art class crap.
35
00:01:38,682 --> 00:01:39,848
Feel this.
36
00:01:39,934 --> 00:01:43,102
I like the thoughtful,
artistic gifts my kids...
37
00:01:43,229 --> 00:01:45,938
[gasps] oh, my
god, that's plush!
38
00:01:46,023 --> 00:01:48,190
[gasps] my robe is fine.
39
00:01:48,317 --> 00:01:51,026
It's just a little
worn in spots.
40
00:01:51,070 --> 00:01:53,821
Uh, one big spot in the back.
41
00:01:53,906 --> 00:01:55,781
Aah! The top of my crack!
42
00:01:55,866 --> 00:01:57,241
[gasps] oh! Here! Come here!
43
00:01:57,368 --> 00:01:58,368
Ooh! Mm.
44
00:01:58,494 --> 00:02:00,119
[gasping]
45
00:02:02,748 --> 00:02:04,248
♪ ♪
46
00:02:04,416 --> 00:02:06,041
It's magical.
47
00:02:06,168 --> 00:02:07,631
But it smells like
burning flip-flops.
48
00:02:07,711 --> 00:02:10,129
[gasps] ow! My flip-flops!
49
00:02:11,006 --> 00:02:12,840
Careful! Live wire
on the ground!
50
00:02:12,967 --> 00:02:14,508
Whoa. Thank you, homer.
51
00:02:14,593 --> 00:02:17,136
Aw, you da man.
52
00:02:18,597 --> 00:02:20,055
Did you hear that?
53
00:02:20,141 --> 00:02:22,057
Kirk said I was da man.
54
00:02:22,143 --> 00:02:25,227
I mean, it sounded stupid,
the way he said it, but still...
55
00:02:25,312 --> 00:02:28,438
Well, uh, if you want to
be "da man" for everybody,
56
00:02:28,524 --> 00:02:31,275
You should post a warning
about that live wire on alarmist.
57
00:02:31,443 --> 00:02:34,027
It's this app that alerts
neighbors to local dangers.
58
00:02:34,155 --> 00:02:35,571
Downloading now.
59
00:02:35,698 --> 00:02:38,115
[lenny] you film
dangerous stuff and post it.
60
00:02:38,200 --> 00:02:39,816
You know, traffic accidents,
61
00:02:39,827 --> 00:02:41,743
Nighttime animals
out during the day.
62
00:02:41,871 --> 00:02:44,204
Uh, hello. This
is homer simpson.
63
00:02:44,373 --> 00:02:45,747
Username, uh...
64
00:02:45,833 --> 00:02:47,207
The simp.
65
00:02:47,334 --> 00:02:50,043
There's a live wire sparking
on evergreen terrace.
66
00:02:50,129 --> 00:02:51,753
Risk of electrocution,
67
00:02:51,881 --> 00:02:53,755
1,000%.
68
00:02:53,883 --> 00:02:55,674
♪ ♪
69
00:02:55,801 --> 00:02:56,633
[gasping]
70
00:02:56,760 --> 00:02:57,926
A thousand percent?
71
00:02:58,012 --> 00:03:00,095
My baby could've
played with that wire!
72
00:03:00,181 --> 00:03:02,306
He ain't born, but
he's 'bout to be.
73
00:03:02,433 --> 00:03:05,475
Congratulations, you're
now part of the alarmy army.
74
00:03:05,644 --> 00:03:09,146
Hey, I can barely read my
name without my cheaters.
75
00:03:09,190 --> 00:03:11,440
How do I get a bigger
font like these guys?
76
00:03:11,525 --> 00:03:14,067
Um, those are the top
alarmers on the app.
77
00:03:14,195 --> 00:03:16,445
You want your name
in a readable font size?
78
00:03:16,530 --> 00:03:18,447
You better learn
how to spread fear.
79
00:03:18,532 --> 00:03:21,658
I'll do it. I'll get to the
top of this leaderboard
80
00:03:21,744 --> 00:03:24,203
If it's the most
useless thing I ever do!
81
00:03:24,330 --> 00:03:27,539
Bart, we need to talk about
mom's birthday present.
82
00:03:27,666 --> 00:03:29,291
Finishing it as we speak.
83
00:03:29,376 --> 00:03:30,667
Ta-da!
84
00:03:30,753 --> 00:03:35,047
Uh, it might be time to
retire the pasta art genre.
85
00:03:35,174 --> 00:03:37,424
What? In my vital
bucatini phase?
86
00:03:37,509 --> 00:03:41,053
You heard what those judgy
women said about our presents.
87
00:03:41,138 --> 00:03:43,639
We need to buy mom
a present this year.
88
00:03:43,766 --> 00:03:44,723
Where are we gonna get money?
89
00:03:44,808 --> 00:03:46,850
Otto stopped paying
for clean urine.
90
00:03:46,936 --> 00:03:49,269
Hmm. Mr. Flanders is generous.
91
00:03:49,396 --> 00:03:52,397
I've sold him so many
magazine subscriptions.
92
00:03:52,524 --> 00:03:54,316
Why cat fancy?
93
00:03:54,401 --> 00:03:57,236
His cat isn't even that fancy.
94
00:03:57,321 --> 00:03:58,487
[humming]
95
00:03:58,614 --> 00:04:00,077
Yo, flan-man. We're
trying to make some scratch
96
00:04:00,157 --> 00:04:01,365
For our mom's birthday gift.
97
00:04:01,492 --> 00:04:03,367
You need any help
cleaning this mess up?
98
00:04:03,494 --> 00:04:05,819
Sorry. I always keep
my grass trimmed.
99
00:04:05,871 --> 00:04:06,912
You know the old saying...
100
00:04:06,997 --> 00:04:09,414
"the lawn is the
mustache of the house."
101
00:04:09,500 --> 00:04:10,749
Aw, we get it.
102
00:04:10,834 --> 00:04:12,793
We just thought mom
deserved something nice.
103
00:04:12,920 --> 00:04:14,962
But if you don't think so,
104
00:04:15,089 --> 00:04:16,213
Mm, that's cool.
105
00:04:16,298 --> 00:04:17,589
Now, well, hold on!
106
00:04:17,758 --> 00:04:21,343
If, uh, you clean those two
leaves on my sidewalk up,
107
00:04:21,470 --> 00:04:22,594
I'll give you...
108
00:04:22,763 --> 00:04:24,179
$44.
109
00:04:24,265 --> 00:04:25,514
- Both leaves?
- [grunts]
110
00:04:25,641 --> 00:04:27,349
-Ow! -Deal.
111
00:04:28,894 --> 00:04:30,143
This store has everything.
112
00:04:30,229 --> 00:04:31,270
[gasps]
113
00:04:31,355 --> 00:04:34,064
This will make mom
feel cozy and loved.
114
00:04:34,191 --> 00:04:37,025
And it'll put a sock in the
yaps of those gossipy hens.
115
00:04:37,111 --> 00:04:39,736
I'm gonna ignore the
problematic "hens"
116
00:04:39,780 --> 00:04:42,114
Because I support the sentiment.
117
00:04:42,992 --> 00:04:44,491
- Whoa.
- Whoa.
118
00:04:44,576 --> 00:04:46,368
Is it a toy?
119
00:04:46,495 --> 00:04:48,745
Yes. But it's also...
120
00:04:48,831 --> 00:04:50,038
Gear.
121
00:04:50,124 --> 00:04:52,416
It's got a pen that's
actually a tape recorder,
122
00:04:52,501 --> 00:04:54,951
An eavesdropping device
that lets you hear conversations
123
00:04:55,045 --> 00:04:55,961
From miles away.
124
00:04:56,088 --> 00:04:57,796
And when you
get in a tight spot,
125
00:04:57,965 --> 00:05:00,299
Sour gummy cyanide capsules!
126
00:05:00,384 --> 00:05:03,135
This could change everything.
127
00:05:03,178 --> 00:05:06,722
Deep down, I
know I'm the dingus!
128
00:05:06,807 --> 00:05:08,640
[crying]
129
00:05:08,767 --> 00:05:10,809
[crying replays on pen]
130
00:05:10,936 --> 00:05:12,227
Give me your lunch money
131
00:05:12,313 --> 00:05:14,646
Or the whole playground
hears you blubber.
132
00:05:14,732 --> 00:05:16,023
You, too, bow tie.
133
00:05:16,984 --> 00:05:20,444
The eavesdropper
could be so useful.
134
00:05:21,697 --> 00:05:25,032
Okay, the meeting of the cool
girls has been called to order.
135
00:05:25,159 --> 00:05:27,367
It's been decided
that the new cool thing
136
00:05:27,453 --> 00:05:29,911
Is to wear earmuffs
in warm weather,
137
00:05:30,080 --> 00:05:31,997
So don't tell any randos...
138
00:05:32,124 --> 00:05:33,790
- [gasps]
- hey, guys!
139
00:05:33,959 --> 00:05:35,208
[chuckling knowingly]
140
00:05:35,294 --> 00:05:37,210
[gasps] now lisa's cool, too!
141
00:05:37,296 --> 00:05:39,546
And there's nothing
we can do about it!
142
00:05:39,631 --> 00:05:41,631
[crying]
143
00:05:41,800 --> 00:05:43,091
[chuckles] yes.
144
00:05:43,177 --> 00:05:45,510
Cry, sherri, cry.
145
00:05:45,637 --> 00:05:47,971
Okay, just thinking out loud...
146
00:05:48,057 --> 00:05:51,933
This kit is the same
price as the robe...
147
00:05:51,977 --> 00:05:54,019
[gasps] are you suggesting
148
00:05:54,104 --> 00:05:55,645
- That we...
- You know I am!
149
00:05:55,731 --> 00:05:57,230
[sighs] say yes. Come on, lis.
150
00:05:57,358 --> 00:05:59,232
I need two keys to
launch this missile.
151
00:05:59,360 --> 00:06:01,943
Mom has never really
been a gift person.
152
00:06:02,029 --> 00:06:04,988
True. She's more
into stuff like hugs
153
00:06:05,074 --> 00:06:06,531
And seeing us happy!
154
00:06:06,617 --> 00:06:09,785
But we can't just buy a spy
kit for us and nothing for mom.
155
00:06:09,912 --> 00:06:11,745
[stammers] bart?
156
00:06:13,123 --> 00:06:15,332
Bart, we can't do this.
157
00:06:15,459 --> 00:06:17,876
Would you like to apply
for a bullseye credit card?
158
00:06:17,961 --> 00:06:19,044
I'm eight.
159
00:06:19,129 --> 00:06:21,171
Yeah, you won't get
it. But if you apply,
160
00:06:21,256 --> 00:06:23,173
You get a free bullseye
ironing board cover.
161
00:06:23,300 --> 00:06:24,966
[gasps] we could buy the spy kit
162
00:06:25,094 --> 00:06:26,968
And give mom the
ironing board cover!
163
00:06:27,054 --> 00:06:30,472
That's like giving her a
whole new ironing board!
164
00:06:30,599 --> 00:06:32,015
Give me an application!
165
00:06:32,101 --> 00:06:34,142
We'll give her two
ironing board covers!
166
00:06:34,228 --> 00:06:35,644
[group] ♪ happy birthday ♪
167
00:06:35,729 --> 00:06:38,355
♪ to you! ♪
168
00:06:39,108 --> 00:06:40,774
Uh, open my present first.
169
00:06:40,859 --> 00:06:41,859
I got to hit the streets.
170
00:06:41,985 --> 00:06:43,402
I have citizens to alarm.
171
00:06:43,487 --> 00:06:46,655
Another charm for
my charm bracelet!
172
00:06:46,782 --> 00:06:49,699
That bracelet was the
smartest investment ever.
173
00:06:49,827 --> 00:06:51,535
No matter what the occasion,
174
00:06:51,662 --> 00:06:52,953
I always know what you need...
175
00:06:53,080 --> 00:06:54,788
Another charm.
176
00:06:54,957 --> 00:06:56,915
You know me so well.
177
00:06:57,042 --> 00:06:59,793
I better after
however many years.
178
00:06:59,920 --> 00:07:01,378
Open mine next!
179
00:07:02,631 --> 00:07:05,632
Oh. An ironing board cover.
180
00:07:05,801 --> 00:07:08,009
Yeah, 'cause,
you know, you iron.
181
00:07:08,053 --> 00:07:09,719
I sure do.
182
00:07:09,805 --> 00:07:11,805
Open mine. It's in
the bullseye bag!
183
00:07:11,932 --> 00:07:14,349
Hmm. Such clever
wrapping. [chuckles]
184
00:07:14,476 --> 00:07:17,769
Ah, it's another
ironing board cover.
185
00:07:17,855 --> 00:07:19,137
What do you get for the woman
186
00:07:19,189 --> 00:07:21,106
Who has only one
ironing board cover?
187
00:07:21,233 --> 00:07:22,983
Thank you. Both of you.
188
00:07:23,068 --> 00:07:24,526
I love them.
189
00:07:25,279 --> 00:07:26,528
I got to hit the road.
190
00:07:26,697 --> 00:07:29,156
If I find just three more
things to warn people about,
191
00:07:29,283 --> 00:07:32,451
I'll move ahead of cautionary
gale and cry wolfcastle
192
00:07:32,494 --> 00:07:33,577
On the leaderboard.
193
00:07:33,662 --> 00:07:34,744
We'll help clean up!
194
00:07:34,913 --> 00:07:35,704
[grunts]
195
00:07:35,873 --> 00:07:37,456
No! I'll do it.
196
00:07:37,541 --> 00:07:41,001
You guys have...
Done so much for me.
197
00:07:46,633 --> 00:07:47,674
[sighs deeply]
198
00:07:52,806 --> 00:07:53,847
[groans]
199
00:07:53,932 --> 00:07:55,012
Enjoying your present, huh?
200
00:07:55,100 --> 00:07:56,683
Don't play with it all day!
201
00:07:56,768 --> 00:07:58,018
[grumbles]
202
00:07:58,145 --> 00:08:00,979
We'll know soon enough
who broke this va...
203
00:08:01,064 --> 00:08:03,315
[gasps, groans]
204
00:08:03,400 --> 00:08:05,030
[bart] yellow sparrow,
this is slingshot.
205
00:08:05,110 --> 00:08:06,860
Prepare for
face-to-face discussion.
206
00:08:07,029 --> 00:08:09,154
Roger that. Face is prepared.
207
00:08:09,239 --> 00:08:11,198
This spy kit is great!
208
00:08:11,325 --> 00:08:14,743
All the secrets of this
house are being laid bare.
209
00:08:14,912 --> 00:08:17,037
And mom loves her present.
210
00:08:17,164 --> 00:08:19,372
She can't stop
muttering about it.
211
00:08:19,458 --> 00:08:20,916
We rule. Over.
212
00:08:21,001 --> 00:08:22,334
Roger that. Over.
213
00:08:23,504 --> 00:08:26,671
Inappropriate billboard
near noiseland arcade.
214
00:08:26,798 --> 00:08:28,673
Guaranteed danger of corruption.
215
00:08:28,800 --> 00:08:30,133
Keep children away!
216
00:08:30,219 --> 00:08:32,302
- [phone chimes]
- hmm. Whoa, whoa.
217
00:08:32,429 --> 00:08:36,056
Thanks for warning us about
the vulgar wordplay, simp!
218
00:08:36,808 --> 00:08:38,892
"itch, please."
219
00:08:39,019 --> 00:08:40,852
Wait, I get it!
220
00:08:40,938 --> 00:08:42,729
"itch" rhymes with "bi..."
221
00:08:42,814 --> 00:08:45,232
Uh, mom hates
that word. Trust me.
222
00:08:46,276 --> 00:08:49,736
One more post
and I'll be top five.
223
00:08:49,821 --> 00:08:51,154
Homer.
224
00:08:51,240 --> 00:08:52,948
Religious fanatic
running through town.
225
00:08:53,033 --> 00:08:54,366
Possibly from murder scene.
226
00:08:54,493 --> 00:08:55,659
Avoid outdoors.
227
00:08:55,744 --> 00:08:57,202
[phone chimes]
228
00:08:57,287 --> 00:08:58,954
- I did it.
- Fanatic!
229
00:08:59,039 --> 00:09:00,497
I'm number five!
230
00:09:00,624 --> 00:09:02,457
I'm better than everyone!
231
00:09:02,584 --> 00:09:04,084
♪ ♪
232
00:09:06,338 --> 00:09:08,964
-[static] -[frink] uh-uh-uh.
Your name is not "frink."
233
00:09:09,049 --> 00:09:11,967
You are "frink's
monster," you see?
234
00:09:12,052 --> 00:09:14,844
[frink's monster]
[growls] frink sad.
235
00:09:14,972 --> 00:09:16,805
[frink] no, frink's
monster is sad!
236
00:09:16,890 --> 00:09:18,557
What is wrong with you?!
237
00:09:18,642 --> 00:09:21,184
[moe] all right, one of youse
rats has been eating pool chalk
238
00:09:21,311 --> 00:09:23,895
And leaving chalky
pellets all over the place.
239
00:09:24,022 --> 00:09:25,235
No, no, don't
look at each other!
240
00:09:25,315 --> 00:09:27,148
Look at me! Hey! Steve!
241
00:09:27,234 --> 00:09:29,109
-[static] -[flanders]
oh, hey, marge.
242
00:09:29,194 --> 00:09:31,903
- [marge] hi, ned.
- Ooh, that's mom!
243
00:09:32,030 --> 00:09:33,488
What a party yesterday.
244
00:09:33,574 --> 00:09:36,575
I don't usually take
my water on the rocks.
245
00:09:36,702 --> 00:09:37,993
I was buzzing all night.
246
00:09:38,078 --> 00:09:40,328
Yeah. It was... Fun.
247
00:09:40,414 --> 00:09:42,539
- [crying]
- [lisa] oh.
248
00:09:42,666 --> 00:09:45,375
Whoa. I didn't mean to
bring on a peeper-puddle.
249
00:09:45,460 --> 00:09:46,460
What's wrong?
250
00:09:46,545 --> 00:09:48,753
[marge] it's silly.
I-I'm embarrassed
251
00:09:48,880 --> 00:09:52,215
That my feelings were
hurt by a stupid birthday gift.
252
00:09:52,342 --> 00:09:54,718
[flanders] oh, now,
feelings aren't stupid.
253
00:09:54,803 --> 00:09:56,970
Some of them are evil,
but they're not stupid.
254
00:09:57,097 --> 00:09:59,723
It's just... On my one day,
255
00:09:59,766 --> 00:10:01,558
I'm barely an afterthought.
256
00:10:01,685 --> 00:10:04,894
It's like they don't
think of me as a person.
257
00:10:05,022 --> 00:10:06,396
[sighs]
258
00:10:07,733 --> 00:10:10,025
I don't get it. Why
is she so sad?
259
00:10:10,152 --> 00:10:12,777
Bart, she's feeling unseen.
260
00:10:12,904 --> 00:10:14,070
What? I always see her.
261
00:10:14,197 --> 00:10:16,031
She's in my phone
contacts three times...
262
00:10:16,158 --> 00:10:18,158
Under "mom,"
"mommy" and "sandwich."
263
00:10:18,201 --> 00:10:21,411
She does so many things
that we take for granted.
264
00:10:21,496 --> 00:10:23,913
Imagine how we
would feel if she...
265
00:10:23,999 --> 00:10:26,541
Half-tushied our birthdays.
266
00:10:26,668 --> 00:10:29,753
What? I'd be fine if she only...
267
00:10:29,838 --> 00:10:31,880
[groaning]
268
00:10:31,965 --> 00:10:33,632
[sighs]
269
00:10:33,759 --> 00:10:35,467
We suck. Over.
270
00:10:35,594 --> 00:10:37,636
Roger that. Over.
271
00:10:38,430 --> 00:10:39,763
As of this morning,
272
00:10:39,848 --> 00:10:43,516
I am number one on the
leaderboard of the alarmist app.
273
00:10:43,644 --> 00:10:44,726
[gasps] look at that!
274
00:10:44,853 --> 00:10:46,853
What? The broken sprinkler?
275
00:10:46,938 --> 00:10:48,104
We need to warn people!
276
00:10:48,190 --> 00:10:49,731
It could cause a sinkhole
277
00:10:49,816 --> 00:10:51,566
Or activate a gremlin!
278
00:10:51,693 --> 00:10:53,526
This is your number one alarmy
279
00:10:53,654 --> 00:10:56,404
With a warning that a geyser
of water is pouring onto...
280
00:10:56,531 --> 00:10:57,864
- [phone chimes]
- wha...?
281
00:10:57,949 --> 00:11:01,242
Hey! Someone named silver
bullet already reported a...
282
00:11:01,370 --> 00:11:04,079
"vertical tsunami at the park."
283
00:11:04,164 --> 00:11:06,539
Whoa! That's good mongering.
284
00:11:06,667 --> 00:11:07,707
I got scooped?
285
00:11:07,834 --> 00:11:10,627
Silver bullet is now
alarmy number one.
286
00:11:10,712 --> 00:11:12,337
What?! Who is this guy?
287
00:11:12,464 --> 00:11:16,383
Those fat fingers are too
slow for the silver bullet!
288
00:11:16,468 --> 00:11:18,968
Silver bullet, your
days are numbered!
289
00:11:19,054 --> 00:11:20,845
Tell me something
my doctor hasn't.
290
00:11:20,972 --> 00:11:23,723
You smell like old lady.
291
00:11:23,850 --> 00:11:25,600
So do you.
292
00:11:25,644 --> 00:11:28,728
I smell like a lot of things.
293
00:11:28,855 --> 00:11:30,772
We have to get
mom a new present.
294
00:11:30,857 --> 00:11:32,148
Something meaningful.
295
00:11:32,275 --> 00:11:35,902
So, let's make a list of
everything we know about mom.
296
00:11:36,029 --> 00:11:38,363
Yes. Great idea.
297
00:11:39,282 --> 00:11:40,407
Mm...
298
00:11:40,492 --> 00:11:43,159
Hmm. Her first name
is actually margaret.
299
00:11:43,245 --> 00:11:45,161
Good. Write that down.
300
00:11:45,247 --> 00:11:46,329
Hmm.
301
00:11:48,125 --> 00:11:51,418
Ooh, I know. She loves
coming to my jazz recitals.
302
00:11:51,503 --> 00:11:52,794
Uh, no, she doesn't.
303
00:11:52,963 --> 00:11:55,714
She hides a copy of people
magazine in the program.
304
00:11:55,799 --> 00:11:57,424
Oh. Ugh!
305
00:11:57,509 --> 00:11:59,634
Why is this so hard?
306
00:11:59,678 --> 00:12:02,470
We should know the
woman who gave birth to us.
307
00:12:02,597 --> 00:12:03,972
Maybe she's unknowable.
308
00:12:04,141 --> 00:12:05,682
What if we just
give her the spy kit
309
00:12:05,767 --> 00:12:08,476
And breakfast in bed
for the rest of her life?
310
00:12:08,562 --> 00:12:10,395
Or, you know that trunk
311
00:12:10,480 --> 00:12:12,981
Where mom keeps all
her memories and stuff?
312
00:12:13,066 --> 00:12:16,693
What if we use the
spy kit to break into it?
313
00:12:16,778 --> 00:12:19,571
Ooh, welcome to the dark side.
314
00:12:19,656 --> 00:12:21,197
♪ ♪
315
00:12:22,367 --> 00:12:23,575
[lisa] huh.
316
00:12:23,618 --> 00:12:25,160
[gasps] here we are.
317
00:12:26,288 --> 00:12:28,621
I don't know if these
lock-picking tools
318
00:12:28,749 --> 00:12:29,998
Are even going to work.
319
00:12:30,083 --> 00:12:34,294
I mean, this is
just a toy... [gasps]
320
00:12:34,379 --> 00:12:39,048
Oh. Now I'm concerned about
those gummy cyanide capsules.
321
00:12:39,134 --> 00:12:41,134
Mom's birth announcement.
322
00:12:41,261 --> 00:12:45,138
Oh, her name is
marjorie, not margaret.
323
00:12:45,265 --> 00:12:48,266
We officially know
nothing about her.
324
00:12:48,393 --> 00:12:49,893
Hmm.
325
00:12:50,061 --> 00:12:52,520
Mom had a parrot named petey?
326
00:12:55,358 --> 00:12:59,027
Oh, they were best friends,
like me and santa's little helper.
327
00:12:59,154 --> 00:13:01,613
- [whining]
- not now, boy. Busy.
328
00:13:01,782 --> 00:13:03,406
[gasps] look at this one.
329
00:13:03,575 --> 00:13:06,993
[bart] oh, mom's parents
must've given petey away.
330
00:13:07,078 --> 00:13:08,953
Hey, we just learned
something about her.
331
00:13:09,039 --> 00:13:10,789
Grandma was a jerk-ass.
332
00:13:10,916 --> 00:13:13,208
Wait. Parrots live
for, like, 80 years.
333
00:13:13,293 --> 00:13:16,169
Maybe we could find
petey, and then reunite mom
334
00:13:16,296 --> 00:13:18,004
With her long-lost friend.
335
00:13:18,131 --> 00:13:19,714
That would be like
getting her a robe
336
00:13:19,841 --> 00:13:21,674
That tells you it
wants crackers.
337
00:13:21,760 --> 00:13:23,259
How do we find this lady?
338
00:13:23,345 --> 00:13:25,678
[lisa] well, we need to
go to north townsburg.
339
00:13:25,722 --> 00:13:27,388
Oh, that place is sketchy.
340
00:13:27,474 --> 00:13:30,558
Milhouse's dad was a sign
spinner for a meth clinic there.
341
00:13:30,644 --> 00:13:32,977
But let's do it, for mar-ge-dy!
342
00:13:33,063 --> 00:13:35,396
- Marjorie.
- Whatever.
343
00:13:37,901 --> 00:13:40,985
Oh, townsburg is
three hours away?!
344
00:13:41,071 --> 00:13:43,238
Fine. I'll just kick
the seat in front of me
345
00:13:43,365 --> 00:13:46,449
Until that little screw
falls out. [grunting]
346
00:13:46,576 --> 00:13:48,159
That is so rude.
347
00:13:48,286 --> 00:13:49,610
[grunting]
348
00:13:49,663 --> 00:13:52,622
Well, you have to get
closer to the screw, like this.
349
00:13:52,707 --> 00:13:54,415
[both grunting]
350
00:13:55,460 --> 00:13:56,501
Great.
351
00:14:00,966 --> 00:14:03,174
[both groaning]
352
00:14:03,301 --> 00:14:05,510
Oh, this place is depressing.
353
00:14:05,595 --> 00:14:07,887
Isn't that the corner
where nic cage went crazy?
354
00:14:08,056 --> 00:14:10,098
Yep. There's the statue.
355
00:14:11,309 --> 00:14:13,601
[gasps] there's the
mechanic's shop.
356
00:14:15,021 --> 00:14:16,187
Let's do this.
357
00:14:16,273 --> 00:14:18,439
Hey, grease stains,
seen this bird?
358
00:14:18,567 --> 00:14:21,776
Yeah, I remember
him. That's krista's bird.
359
00:14:21,862 --> 00:14:23,152
He in some kind of trouble?
360
00:14:23,238 --> 00:14:24,571
We'll ask the questions.
361
00:14:24,656 --> 00:14:27,407
What's the skinny on
this krista character?
362
00:14:27,492 --> 00:14:29,492
Well, she owns the craft
store down the block.
363
00:14:29,661 --> 00:14:31,077
She also sells liquor and weed.
364
00:14:31,204 --> 00:14:32,871
- Let's go.
- Don't leave town.
365
00:14:32,998 --> 00:14:34,914
But my niece's
wedding is tomorrow.
366
00:14:34,958 --> 00:14:36,875
I said don't leave town.
367
00:14:37,002 --> 00:14:41,004
Fine. Hey, shirl, it's
vince. I can't make it.
368
00:14:41,089 --> 00:14:44,257
I don't know, some kid
told me I can't leave town.
369
00:14:44,342 --> 00:14:46,718
I've got to get back to
being alarmy number one.
370
00:14:46,803 --> 00:14:49,762
Gotta warn people
about... Something.
371
00:14:49,890 --> 00:14:53,057
[gasps] death from above.
372
00:14:53,184 --> 00:14:55,184
Falling branches
in springfield park!
373
00:14:55,228 --> 00:14:58,146
- Stay away.
- [phones chiming]
374
00:14:58,273 --> 00:15:00,773
- We have to get out of here!
- I did it.
375
00:15:00,901 --> 00:15:02,317
I'm alarmy number one!
376
00:15:02,444 --> 00:15:05,445
Not for long, you
toad-faced beanbag.
377
00:15:05,572 --> 00:15:10,033
I will cut you into tiny pieces
like my son's pancakes.
378
00:15:10,118 --> 00:15:12,744
I'm going to eat you
up and crap you out
379
00:15:12,829 --> 00:15:14,787
Like my son's pancakes.
380
00:15:14,873 --> 00:15:16,080
[grumbles]
381
00:15:17,083 --> 00:15:19,542
The air at springfield
park is full of pollen.
382
00:15:19,586 --> 00:15:22,211
Individuals with lungs
should avoid the area.
383
00:15:22,339 --> 00:15:23,546
[groans]
384
00:15:23,632 --> 00:15:26,591
Lifeless bodies at the
park. Possible gas leak.
385
00:15:26,718 --> 00:15:29,427
Demented man throwing
objects at the duck pond.
386
00:15:29,512 --> 00:15:31,220
Chemical air attack
at the play yard.
387
00:15:31,306 --> 00:15:33,598
Ufos hovering over picnic area.
388
00:15:33,683 --> 00:15:37,143
String-guided dragons, most
likely time travelers attack...
389
00:15:37,270 --> 00:15:39,395
I saw the kites
first, ya big galoot!
390
00:15:39,522 --> 00:15:40,522
[rumbling]
391
00:15:40,649 --> 00:15:42,065
[both cry out]
392
00:15:42,108 --> 00:15:43,274
What happened?
393
00:15:43,360 --> 00:15:46,194
The earth couldn't
support your giant ass.
394
00:15:46,321 --> 00:15:47,946
Maybe satan heard your voice
395
00:15:48,031 --> 00:15:50,114
And decided to
fast-track you to hell.
396
00:15:50,200 --> 00:15:52,450
Okay, we both got one in.
397
00:15:52,535 --> 00:15:54,827
How are we getting
out of this sinkhole?
398
00:15:54,913 --> 00:15:57,121
I dropped my phone.
Do you have yours?
399
00:15:57,207 --> 00:15:59,958
No. Just start shouting.
Someone will hear us.
400
00:16:00,043 --> 00:16:01,876
- Help!
- Down here!
401
00:16:01,962 --> 00:16:03,878
Save me, not her!
402
00:16:03,964 --> 00:16:06,756
[girl] hurry, the
dragons are coming!
403
00:16:06,883 --> 00:16:10,218
Oh, yeah, petey. He
was smart as a whip.
404
00:16:10,303 --> 00:16:13,254
Could imitate anything:
Political figures of the day,
405
00:16:13,306 --> 00:16:16,057
The "you lose" horn
from price is right.
406
00:16:16,142 --> 00:16:18,142
So many times I
thought contestants lost
407
00:16:18,228 --> 00:16:19,394
When they hadn't.
408
00:16:19,562 --> 00:16:22,939
Why are you talking
about him in the past tense?
409
00:16:23,066 --> 00:16:26,609
Oh, I left his cage open by
mistake and he flew away.
410
00:16:26,695 --> 00:16:29,278
Last I heard, he joined
a flock of wild parrots.
411
00:16:29,364 --> 00:16:32,907
Oh. I guess we came
all this way for nothing.
412
00:16:33,034 --> 00:16:34,409
Stay in town.
413
00:16:34,494 --> 00:16:36,160
But my daughter's wedding is...
414
00:16:36,287 --> 00:16:39,664
[sighs] shirl? Bad news.
415
00:16:39,749 --> 00:16:41,916
We failed mom again.
416
00:16:42,002 --> 00:16:44,335
We are losers.
417
00:16:44,421 --> 00:16:47,880
[voice imitates the
price is right horn]
418
00:16:47,966 --> 00:16:49,632
Bart, it's petey!
419
00:16:49,718 --> 00:16:51,759
How can we lure him down here?
420
00:16:51,845 --> 00:16:53,428
Uh, uh, I've got it.
421
00:16:53,555 --> 00:16:56,431
[marge's voice] bart, are
you secretly recording me?
422
00:16:56,558 --> 00:16:58,975
I'm on hold to talk
about our water bill.
423
00:16:59,102 --> 00:17:00,852
I'm sorry, no, I'm
not talking to you.
424
00:17:00,937 --> 00:17:03,062
I'm talking to my annoying son.
425
00:17:03,148 --> 00:17:04,605
- Yes!
- Got him!
426
00:17:04,733 --> 00:17:05,862
[petey] annoying son. [squawks]
427
00:17:05,942 --> 00:17:07,191
[agnes] hello?!
428
00:17:07,277 --> 00:17:09,485
Can't any of you
idiots hear us?!
429
00:17:09,612 --> 00:17:12,905
There's no one to save us.
We scared everyone away.
430
00:17:13,033 --> 00:17:15,700
- Isn't that ironic?
- I guess.
431
00:17:15,827 --> 00:17:17,952
No, I'm asking. I don't
know what ironic means.
432
00:17:18,038 --> 00:17:20,079
Why did we get so crazy?
433
00:17:20,206 --> 00:17:21,831
I was doing a public service.
434
00:17:21,916 --> 00:17:23,380
I warned everyone
that broken sprinkler
435
00:17:23,460 --> 00:17:24,751
Would cause a sinkhole.
436
00:17:24,919 --> 00:17:27,879
Bull-scat. You were trying
to move up the leaderboard.
437
00:17:28,048 --> 00:17:31,049
- We both were.
- Now we're stuck down here.
438
00:17:31,176 --> 00:17:34,093
[sighs] I miss
the surface world.
439
00:17:34,220 --> 00:17:36,304
Hey, you gotta share that!
440
00:17:36,389 --> 00:17:38,639
We both need strength
to fight off chuds.
441
00:17:38,767 --> 00:17:42,101
Hell no. My
werther's, my choice.
442
00:17:42,187 --> 00:17:44,937
- [grumbling]
- [choking]
443
00:17:45,065 --> 00:17:46,647
Yeah, yeah, you
got candy in there.
444
00:17:46,775 --> 00:17:47,899
Stop showing off.
445
00:17:48,026 --> 00:17:50,818
Are you choking?
Hang on, I'll save you.
446
00:17:50,945 --> 00:17:52,904
Wait, is this irony?
447
00:17:52,989 --> 00:17:56,657
Ow. Ow! Okay, I'm doing it.
448
00:17:56,785 --> 00:17:57,825
[grunts]
449
00:17:57,911 --> 00:17:59,452
[gasps] I can breathe!
450
00:17:59,537 --> 00:18:00,537
[sighs]
451
00:18:00,663 --> 00:18:01,871
Simpson,
452
00:18:01,956 --> 00:18:04,707
Instead of mongering
fear, you mongered...
453
00:18:04,793 --> 00:18:06,793
Life itself.
454
00:18:06,920 --> 00:18:09,003
- Thank you.
- [gasps]
455
00:18:09,089 --> 00:18:11,130
This is the feeling I was after.
456
00:18:11,216 --> 00:18:13,049
Not some stupid leaderboard.
457
00:18:13,176 --> 00:18:14,472
I'm gonna help
you get out of here.
458
00:18:14,552 --> 00:18:16,761
Step in my hands,
I'll boost you up.
459
00:18:16,930 --> 00:18:18,221
[grunts]
460
00:18:18,306 --> 00:18:22,225
Oh, there's so
much to grab on to.
461
00:18:24,303 --> 00:18:27,146
I'll tell everyone
you're down there.
462
00:18:27,232 --> 00:18:31,192
Which will make me
alarmy number one. Suck it!
463
00:18:31,361 --> 00:18:33,986
Hairless ground
hippo stuck in sinkhole.
464
00:18:34,072 --> 00:18:37,198
She's horrible.
465
00:18:37,325 --> 00:18:40,785
Mom, we have one more
birthday surprise for you.
466
00:18:40,870 --> 00:18:42,203
Oh. Really?
467
00:18:42,288 --> 00:18:46,833
We tracked down
your best friend.
468
00:18:46,918 --> 00:18:49,752
- Petey?
- Petey?
469
00:18:49,879 --> 00:18:52,046
How-how is this happening?
470
00:18:52,132 --> 00:18:54,048
How is this happening?!
471
00:18:54,134 --> 00:18:56,175
How is this happening?!
How is this happening?!
472
00:18:56,261 --> 00:19:01,639
Aah! Get it off! Get
it off before he... oh!
473
00:19:01,766 --> 00:19:02,807
-Ew. -Ugh.
474
00:19:02,934 --> 00:19:04,725
- Ow! Ow!
- [lisa] bart, do something!
475
00:19:04,811 --> 00:19:06,644
[grunts]
476
00:19:06,729 --> 00:19:07,645
Sorry.
477
00:19:07,730 --> 00:19:08,938
We thought he loved you.
478
00:19:09,023 --> 00:19:10,773
This is how he shows love.
479
00:19:10,900 --> 00:19:13,151
By grooming me and
regurgitating on me.
480
00:19:13,319 --> 00:19:15,111
I could never have friends over,
481
00:19:15,196 --> 00:19:16,529
He was so possessive.
482
00:19:16,656 --> 00:19:17,780
Mine!
483
00:19:17,866 --> 00:19:20,283
[squawking angrily]
484
00:19:28,084 --> 00:19:29,625
So why did you even get him?
485
00:19:29,711 --> 00:19:32,086
I didn't. I wanted a kitten.
486
00:19:32,213 --> 00:19:34,338
Our neighbor was
giving away their parrot.
487
00:19:34,424 --> 00:19:38,509
Since petey can meow, my dad
decided he was close enough.
488
00:19:38,595 --> 00:19:39,802
[petey] meow.
489
00:19:39,929 --> 00:19:42,221
- You're nothing like a kitten!
- [all yell]
490
00:19:42,348 --> 00:19:45,183
Don't worry, we'll take
him back to townsburg.
491
00:19:45,268 --> 00:19:47,059
He's part of a wild flock there.
492
00:19:47,145 --> 00:19:49,312
You went all the
way to townsburg?
493
00:19:49,480 --> 00:19:51,772
We wanted to get you
something, you know,
494
00:19:51,900 --> 00:19:53,733
Personal for your birthday.
495
00:19:53,860 --> 00:19:57,403
Yeah. We did not make
friends on the bus ride home.
496
00:19:57,530 --> 00:19:59,071
Petey is kind of racist.
497
00:19:59,199 --> 00:20:01,991
Well, that's just... [crying]
498
00:20:02,076 --> 00:20:03,367
We're sorry.
499
00:20:03,494 --> 00:20:05,203
We didn't mean to
re-traumatize you
500
00:20:05,330 --> 00:20:07,663
With your childhood
nightmare bird.
501
00:20:07,790 --> 00:20:10,041
My wonderful babies!
502
00:20:10,168 --> 00:20:12,501
You went to all
that trouble for me.
503
00:20:12,587 --> 00:20:16,214
I wasn't an afterthought,
I was a thought.
504
00:20:16,299 --> 00:20:19,800
Well, yeah, 'cause... You know,
505
00:20:19,928 --> 00:20:23,221
We see you as a person.
506
00:20:23,348 --> 00:20:27,516
We really do. Our
favorite person.
507
00:20:27,685 --> 00:20:29,769
Oh, that is so...
508
00:20:29,854 --> 00:20:31,896
- [crunch]
- ow!
509
00:20:32,023 --> 00:20:34,649
You little...
510
00:20:34,734 --> 00:20:38,402
Who wants to help mommy
abandon petey in townsburg?
511
00:20:38,529 --> 00:20:39,779
[both] we do!
512
00:20:52,335 --> 00:20:54,543
- [tires screech]
- [crashing]
513
00:20:54,796 --> 00:20:56,629
[concerned murmuring]
514
00:20:56,756 --> 00:20:59,799
Marge, what a beautiful robe.
515
00:20:59,926 --> 00:21:01,384
Is that terry cloth?
516
00:21:01,469 --> 00:21:05,012
French terry, from the
terry province of France.
517
00:21:05,139 --> 00:21:07,014
[excited murmuring]
518
00:21:07,141 --> 00:21:08,474
My kids got it for me.
519
00:21:08,601 --> 00:21:11,644
I just threw it on to see
what that noise was.
520
00:21:11,771 --> 00:21:14,772
I think it came from over there.
521
00:21:14,857 --> 00:21:17,316
Look at the fullness
in that sleeve.
522
00:21:17,443 --> 00:21:20,528
What was that sound?
I don't see anything.
523
00:21:20,571 --> 00:21:24,031
Well, it's a mystery.
We may never know.
524
00:21:24,200 --> 00:21:25,788
- Look at how it moves.
- Poetry in fabric.
525
00:21:25,868 --> 00:21:27,076
You better work.
526
00:21:28,538 --> 00:21:30,538
[bart laughs]
527
00:21:30,623 --> 00:21:32,832
Mission accomplished. Over.
528
00:21:32,959 --> 00:21:34,750
[both] roger that. Over.
529
00:21:34,919 --> 00:21:36,961
Shh!
530
00:21:37,041 --> 00:21:39,041
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