All language subtitles for Married.at.First.Sight.UK.S08E34.1080p.ALL4.WEB-DL.AAC2.0.H.264-NTb[eztv.re]_track4_eng

Previously... You've helped me
realise what I don't want.

I'm giving you this back.

After Laura brought her marriage
to a dramatic demise...

I took a chance

and it didn't pay off.

We could have had
something special.

I don't really know what else to
say, to be honest right now, sorry.

..Erica and Jordan looked forward
to their happy ever after.

I see a future with you by my side

and I can't wait to continue
this journey together.

Tonight...

Do you see me and Tasha,
like, working out?

I don't think you will. BLEEP.

..the last three couples seek
the wisdom of loved ones.

My fear is that JJ is going to say

that we're better off not
as a couple.

Adrienne doesn't want kids.

Oh, God, that's terrible.

Before bringing
this year's experiment...

I have made my decision.

Sometimes you've got to be cruel
to be kind.

I've finally learnt what I want
and deserve.

..to its epic conclusion.

I am very nervous about what Paul
is going to say.

I have come to the decision
that is the best for me.

As they decide whether to recommit
to one another...

These past few days,
I have been forced to ask myself

if you're the right woman for me.

..or end their marriages forever.

The biggest hurdle for me
is you not wanting kids,

and whether I see you and me
together.

I had to think long and hard
about all the times we've clashed

and what that said
about our relationship.

And Peggy must make the agonising
choice between family...

Do you think he is the perfect
son-in-law for you?

I wouldn't pick him.

..and the fairy tale.

I have thought over and over again

whether this is game over for us.

SHE SNIFFLES
I'm sorry.

This programme contains
strong language

This is by far the biggest
decision of my life.

My family want the best for me,

and family and respect to me
are everything.

They want me to be happy
and to put myself first.

And as much as I wanted
to trust you...

..trust for me is something
that is earned.

I may not trust easily...

..but I trust myself.

And I also trust that you'll prove
everyone who doubts you wrong.

And so my decision is to stay
and continue our story together.

Our fairy tale may just have begun.

But I'm certain it'll end
with a happy ever after

and the greatest reward of all,
love.

Come here.

That was beautiful.
Your vows were beautiful.

That was amazing.

You're very special.

I promised you we'd have fun
from the day we met

and that's just the start.
Here we go.

I feel really lucky to have Georges.

I've never really looked
forward to my future,

but now I'm just thinking about us.

I'm absolutely besotted with you
and I absolutely adore you.

I'm so confident in what we have.

You are everything I've asked for.

And you are most
of what I asked for,

but everything that I need.

Everything. Love that.

You're standing in your suitcase.

I need to squish it in.

Back in London, the remaining
couples are preparing to leave

the apartments
ahead of their final vows.

It is a very surreal feeling,
the journey that we've been on.

I feel like I've not only gained,
like, a wife,

but, like, I've gained
a best friend, as well.

Are you all packed?
I'm getting there.

You're very tidy.

I do feel sad that we're leaving
the apartment.

We're not going to wake up together
every single morning.

Yes, we're not going to be doing
that for now.

It's just going to be different.

I am genuinely really sad
that this is our final morning

in the experiment.

Like, how has it come
to this moment already?

All right, you're sloppy.

I've got a couple days to think
about what I'm going to do.

We've had a lot of highs,
but we also had quite a few lows.

And now I'm actually going
to have the space and time

to really focus on
what's best for me.

SHE LAUGHS

From the instant they met...

Hi!

..there was an obvious spark
between Paul and Tasha.

What's your name?
My name's Paul.

Nice to meet you. I'm Tasha.

Nice to meet you, Tasha.

Week after week...

Yes, I'm falling in love with Tasha.

OK. Oh, my God.

CHEERING

..they established themselves

as one of the experiment's
strongest couples.

How do you feel in this moment?

Safe.

Despite a troubling bump
in the road...

I don't want to argue with you now,
but obviously you're not all right.

She'll scream it in my face.

This was the boundary
and she's crossed it completely.

DOOR SLAMS

Paul...
An emotional final date...

From the moment I met you,

I knew that this was going
to be something special.

..cemented the couple's feelings
for one another.

So, are you falling for me?

Yeah?
PAUL CHUCKLES

I'm so grateful to have had
this experience

and actually met someone
that I genuinely care about.

I like the way we're heading.

I'll miss you.

I'll miss you.

I'd like to say Paul and I are
on the same page

in terms of what we want in
the future and stuff.

I miss you already.

Bye, Paul.

I'm just hoping
he doesn't change his mind.

We're almost at the end,

and I didn't actually anticipate

that I would have feelings
this strong for somebody.

That is probably the first time
you've said that.

Genuinely,
that means the world to me.

It takes a lot for Adrienne
to bring her emotions out

sometimes, and shit,
the girl does like me.

I don't want to go. No.

Bit shit, innit?

My feelings are so strong for him,

but I am slightly worried
because we're very different.

I hope that we can work
through the differences.

How did you feel with
the children conversation?

If I had the option, I'd want
to have kids with you.

But I think what we have is
very rare. Mm.

So if I have kids with you,
it's a bonus.

If we don't, we don't.

OK.

I mean what I say.

If I want to be with this girl,
this is my decision.

And right now I'm OK with that.

Obviously it's a nice feeling
that Matt's happy to change

his whole world around for me.

I'm gonna miss you.
I'm gonna miss you.

But it does concern me, because it
has also been a short space of time

to completely change your life.

I'll see you soon.

Bye. Bye.

Bye, husband.

Bye, wifey. Bye, stranger.

I feel like it's a weird
feeling this morning. Yeah.

It's like last day at school,
isn't it? Yeah.

As Ella and JJ aren't
a married couple,

this will be their first
official commitment to one another.

These vows are an opportunity
to be truly vulnerable

and decide whether to continue
their relationship.

How are you feeling?

I don't know, I do feel emotional.

It's been such a long, hard journey,
but the fact that I'm sat here,

like, with you, that is still
the best decision that I've made.

I'm back, bitches!
TASHA SCREAMS

After rejoining the experiment
as a new couple...

I am really happy and I think you
can tell by the smile on my face.

..Ella and JJ had
an encouraging start.

When you're in a room,
it's like you're the only person
that's in the room.

But Ella's fear of history
repeating...

We haven't had sex yet.

I'm thinking, "Fuck, am
I being friend-zoned again?"

..and JJ's concerns over
her behaviour in private...

She's got really, really drunk
and she said some things to me

that I didn't like.

..have knocked the fledgling
romance off course.

When you have the same, like,
argument over and over again

with someone, you feel
like you might as well give up.

You know, right now, we're probably
both in a funny head space

about how we feel. Yeah.

But, like, it doesn't take away
the good things that we've done.

The last few days have been tough.

I have a few regrets

at how sometimes
I've screamed and shouted

and conducted myself.

I am worried I've pissed JJ off,

and I don't feel like I've got
any clarification

about how he feels
and where his head's at.

And that's what
I'm finding difficult.

Like, I don't want to speak for you,

but there's a lot for me to
obviously think about,

and it'd be good to clarify what
the right thing to do is.

It's really sad,

like, leaving Ella today.

Ella and I have been through
so much together

and she's been such a huge,
huge part of this experience.

Not knowing what I want
is tricky,

but I know I've got
a decision to make.

Ultimately, I want to be happy
and I want Ella to be happy.

Right, I should get going.

Taxi's...

..coming in, like, two minutes.

This feels so weird.

Part of me...

..wants to believe
this little fairy tale.

I'll see you in a few days.

Are you OK?

But then part of me is also saying,

"I need to think of me
and do what's best for me."

Right.

Jasmine!

Mm, hello, hello.

The final three couples have arrived
back in their home towns

ahead of final vows.

While Matt
has returned to Harrogate,

two hours away in Cumbria,

Adrienne is seeking advice
from her grandmother.

It feels so nice to be home.

Yeah, I missed you.

Actually, I'm shocked at that.

The thing with my nana
is she's very straight to the point

and she will tell you exactly
how it is.

So I know that she's going to give
me the most honest and brutal advice

if I need any.

So, how did things go?

Things have been really,
really good.

Yeah, that's good.

Hello.

Hi!

On their wedding day...

What did you ask for?

You.

..Adrienne and Matt bonded
over shared life experiences.

My mum's got MS,
so she's now in a care home.

OK. Yeah. Bless you.

My dad's...
He's, like, paralysed, but...

Yeah? It's hard, isn't it? Yeah.

But concerns over their differing
personality types...

He doesn't give me the energy.

So to not have that with Matt
is giving me major doubts.

..and contrasting visions
for their future together...

It does worry me that
you do want kids

and I've always said
I don't want them.

..sowed seeds of doubt for Adrienne.

Listening to you now saying that
we're amazing, we're the best,

and it's almost as if
you're convincing yourself

that we're having this great time,
but it's not the case.

A big topic for us
has been having children.

Obviously I don't want kids.
You don't want children.

And Matt said he did want kids,

but he's now said that he's happy
not to have children.

But would you not change
your mind down the line?

But I worry that it gets to
three years and he's like,

"Right, I'm ready
to have kids now."

And I'm like, "Well,
I told you I didn't want kids."

I mean, I think we could work,

but I feel like there's a lot of
work to still be done,

and I feel like he's quite
introverted compared to me.

You do need to tone down a fraction.

But why do I need to tone down?

Like, I want somebody to meet me
on that level.

But you don't always get
everybody the same as yourself.

I know, and that's one thing
I've absolutely discovered.

Matt is a great guy, and we both
came for what we wanted,

and that's each other.

But also, I wouldn't ever
want to change Matt,

but I feel like sometimes Matt just
tells me what I want to hear,

which has been a problem.

I have a massive decision to make.

Do I protect him by leaving

because I know that'll be good
for him in the future?

Being honest with yourself
is sometimes brutal, and right now,

that's what I need to be.

There you are.
Thank you.

Oh, that's nice.

In Harrogate,
Matt is hoping his mum can offer

some words of wisdom.

So, how has it been going then,
since I last saw you?

It's just been a whirlwind.

It's been probably one of the best
experiences

I've ever done in my life.

It's like not only have I got
this amazing wife,

but I've also got...
A friend, really.

I've made a best friend, as well.
Yeah.

I think she makes you really happy.

We get on like a house on fire,
so... Yeah.

He seems to have fallen
for her hook, line and sinker.

I mean, it's all over his face
and in his eyes and everything,

which is wonderful.

So, is there anything
that you're worried about?

So, there is quite a big concern.

Erm, and that's...

..Adrienne doesn't want kids.

Oh, God. Why?

That's terrible.

I know, so that is obviously
a massive hurdle.

It was a bit of a shock.
I'm shocked.

You know how much I wanted
to be a grandma

and you a dad. Yeah, yeah.

Matt has always
wanted to have children,

so it's devastating for me.

But it's actually made me think,
well, if I didn't have kids,

it's not going to be the end
of the world.

That worries me.

Why? You're going against what
you've always wanted. Hm.

Aren't you?

In a way, yeah.

I don't think you can dismiss it.

It's a big thing to give up.

Yeah.

But you have to do
what you want to do.

It's your life, Matt. But just don't
jump in and regret it.

Mum bringing up she wanted grandkids
and stuff is important.

Adrienne not wanting kids has thrown
a spanner in the works.

It's something my mum's
always wanted me to do.

I'd want kids.

So is Adrienne worth me not
having that dream?

This isn't just a relationship.

This is a future, as well.

I have to put myself first.

Geez, what are you doing?
Oh, hello, mate!

As the couples prepare
for vow renewals,

Paul has returned
to his family home in Chesham.

While Tasha is back in Leeds
catching up with best friend Izzy.

How's it like being back
in Leeds and away from Paul?

I'm loving being home. Mm-hm.

But it is weird being away from him.

I do love looking after him

and just hearing his voice
and stuff.

And you've not scared him away
with your shouting?

We have had arguments, but as
we've gone through the experiment,

it's become less of an issue.

Week by week,

my wall has started to come down...
Yeah. ..and I can open up to him.

I think Tasha really needs
a down-to-earth,

nice, funny guy.

And I think Paul is the right
balance of allowing her

to be exactly who she wants
to be,

but also standing
his own ground.

But now that I'm home and
I'm in my normal environment...

Yeah. ..my mind is now
starting to go a bit wild. Yeah.

I don't feel like I'm opening up

as much as he wants me to open up.
Yeah.

I don't know if it's enough for him.

I think he needs to recognise
how far you have come. Mm.

Do you think that if it was ever
too much for him,

do you think
he would say something?

I do fear that outside of
the experiment,

it is going to be too much for him
and he will just leave.

Yeah.

Oh, God.

This is a lot.

When I was with Paul, I felt
like I knew what his decision

was going to be.

But now that he's gone home,

spending time
with his family and friends,

I'm terrified that they could
influence his decision.

Mate, I've got so much to tell
you since I last saw you.

200 miles away in Chesham...

Like what? ..Paul is seeking advice
from his friend Tristan.

I've actually got this far
with Tasha.

No-one thought it.

What do you actually like about her?

Obviously, physically,
she's a good-looking girl,

but her personality, as well.
Yeah. I'm not believing it at all.

I can't lie. I honestly want her to
be my favourite person.

But I'm just not used to
so much conflict.

Don't fucking call me a little girl,
Paul.

At the homestays...

Do you feel like you get
angry quite quickly or not?

Yeah, feisty. Yeah?
I'm fiery.

..Tasha's outspoken nature...

Don't chat shit about me.

Wow.

..left Paul's friends questioning
their compatibility.

Kind of the way she talks to
you is a little bit kind of, like,

degrading at times.

Run for your life, bruv.

I'm not even... No.

You see the fiery thing, though?
Yeah.

How are you actually
going to handle

this level of fieriness
constantly?

I do have some reservations
about Tasha,

because I think the conflict
is only going to double up and grow.

I don't know if he can be
his true self around her.

It's not Paul. It's not Paul.

That's the thing,

do you see me and Tasha, like,
working out in the real world?

In the real world?

Hmm...

That's a no. Honest...

No, no, honest answer,
you know what it is, yeah?

Don't get mad at me, but I don't
think you will long term.

I don't even know what to say
to that, really.

Like, it's not nice for my best mate
to say that me and Tasha

are not going to work,
but are our arguments

or personality clashes going
to finish it off completely?

Well, listen, it's your decision,
so, you know.

Only you know what to do.

The problem is,
I don't know, mate.

I feel like, honestly,
if it was 100% or you did know,

we wouldn't even need this much
conversation.

You'd just say to me,
"She's the one, bro."

So I feel like deep down, you know.

Yeah.

Fuck.

I chose to do this experiment
because I am ready for love.

If this doesn't work out,
then I will have to rebuild myself.

Having that time at home
has made me come to a realisation

of a few things.

I am doubting our future.

Our personalities are just
different and...

..I want somebody that I can
thrive off and bounce off.

Somebody who knows exactly
what they want.

I'm a bit on edge today.

I've had to think long and hard.

It was difficult going home
listening to family

about mine and Adrienne's
relationship.

At this point, not having children
could be a deal breaker.

It is such a big call.

Today boils down to the future
I've wanted -

finding a wife who wants kids -

or the future with Adrienne.

The decision I've come to today
is definitely best

for the both of us.

Adrienne needs to know the truth
about how I really feel.

There's so many factors
that I've had to think about.

Everything that I need
to compromise on,

everything that Matt needs
to compromise on.

I don't want kids.
Matt wants kids.

I wanted somebody coming into this

who knew exactly what they wanted
from life.

Matt is trying to mould himself
into this man

that he thinks that I want.

I want somebody who wants
what they want, not what I want.

I have made my decision.

Sometimes you've got to be cruel
to be kind.

Wow.

You look gorgeous.

Totally got lipstick all over you.
You look amazing.

Are you OK?
Yeah, are you? Yeah.

You are stunning.
You look gorgeous.

Oh, God.

Adrienne.

I came into this experiment hoping
to find my forever woman.

As soon
as you walked down the aisle,

I was stunned by this gorgeous
woman coming towards me.

The first conversation we had was
a moment I'll remember forever,

because we found out how much
we have in common.

I love that you are a bubbly,
fun, outgoing person.

I genuinely feel like I've won
the lottery.

For the first time in my life,

I finally feel like I'm good enough
for someone.

Don't get me wrong though,

we have had some challenging moments
along the way.

I have many concerns.

But the biggest hurdle for me
is you not wanting kids.

I've always wanted children.

And knowing they might not
be a part of my future...

..I have to imagine what life on
the outside world might look like.

And whether I see you
and me together.

Hand on heart...

..I can't see anyone else
in my life but you.

Adrienne, you have brought a sparkle
back into my life.

I visualise a lot of things,
and the biggest one right now

is creating the most amazing
memories with you.

You are my rock.

That was so nice.

From the heart, you know.

Matt.

I can't believe seven weeks ago
I didn't even know your name

or that you even existed.

But what I couldn't have anticipated
was our connection

from the moment
that we met.

My first impressions were,
"God, he's fit.

"And he's tall."

But also, you're not just easy
on the eye.

You're kind, caring, and thoughtful.

In this short space of time,

we've had some of our best
times together.

But there's also been some
big challenges.

I've worked extremely hard to become
this strong and resilient woman

stood in front of you today.

But I wonder if I am
too overbearing for you.

I've worked extremely hard to become
the strong and resilient woman

stood in front of you today.

But I wonder if I am
too overbearing for you.

At the start, you said you wanted
children.

But now you're willing not
to have them

for the sake of us being together.

This makes me question if you're
just looking at the short term

rather than forever.

I thought I would be happy
to have some time apart.

I was nervous that I wouldn't
miss you.

However...

It's true what they say.

Absence makes the heart grow fonder.

And this time apart has cemented

that I'm ready for a life together
outside the experiment.

Now let's dream big,

aspire to be great and continue our
adventure in the outside world,

because I'm falling for you.

Love that.

Oh.

Ready for the outside life?
Let's do it.

Crazy, isn't it?
Oh, God. It is crazy.

I'm on flipping cloud nine.

I'm absolutely buzzing.

What a feeling. I just can't get
over how amazing she looks as well.

You look unbelievable.

I'm blown away.

I knew that we would go
on a journey.

I just didn't know how much
of a journey.

I'm glad that we're here
and we've made it through,

and this is it now.

We're going to go and see
what the world holds for us.

Sam, bro. How are you doing? Sweet.
Come in.

In Essex, JJ has returned home to
deliberate,

while partner Ella has travelled

three hours back to her hometown,
Weston-super-Mare.

It actually feels really nice
to be home.

Hello, my darl! Hello.

Towards the end of the experiment,

things haven't been so great
with JJ.

OK, so how is it being home?

It feels weird. Does it? Does it
feel weird being away from JJ?

Yeah, like, I miss, I actually
do miss JJ.

He would sit in bed and listen
to me talking about, like,

my transition stuff.

And he would ask questions,

basically just making me feel
accepted.

But obviously, like, not everything
is perfect.

And he does blow hot and cold.

If you were to ask JJ right
now, like,

"Do you like me?
Do you have feelings for me?",

what do you think he would say?

He would say,
"I care about you a lot."

OK. And then it stops there.

I want the answer to be, "Yeah, I
do really like you",

because it used to be like that.
Why, and what's happened?

Um...

A lot of JJ's issues with me

is mainly just that
when I've had a drink,

I can be quite loud and brash.

I suddenly pluck up the courage
to be like,

"OK, I don't like this",

and then it all comes out
the wrong way.

She can be, you know, a little bit
too crazy,

but that isn't Ella all of the time.

I think Ella needs JJ to learn
to accept her for her.

I don't know, I don't want to say
it's not right, but, you know,

you're just very different
in personality.

There will be plenty of people
out there

that accept you - everything.

Charlotte's obviously got my best
interests at heart.

Keep blaming myself and doubting
myself,

but I shouldn't need to change who I
am.

What is your gut feeling
of how this is going to go?

My fear is that JJ is going to say

that we're better off not as a
couple.

That's my fear.

I think since being away
from JJ, I've had a few more doubts.

I think because JJ has accepted me

and he's everything
I could ever want,

I feel like I'm putting
this pressure on myself

to be this perfect girlfriend,

but I feel like I'm having to
compromise who I am.

I love the idea of me and JJ.

But I think in reality...

..it's not as perfect
as I hoped or wanted it to be.

I need to take JJ out of this

and think about what's
best for me.

Made you a coffee, mate.
Cheers, mate. Appreciate it.

All right, bro.

Yeah, so the last time I saw you was
with, um, Ella.

How's things going?

We've had, like, some
amazing, like, amazing times.

But there's also quite a lot of,
like, bad times as well.

So what's changed from then to now?

More often than not, we're, like,
arguing and bickering.

And I just think
she's an amazing person.

But we're quite different in terms
of she's quite, like, chaotic

and I'm more relaxed and chilled
and quite different.

The biggest one is, like,
the disrespect

when she's been drinking.

How do you feel she's being
disrespectful, in what way?

Her insults and stuff are quite
personal.

Like, some of the things
that she said to me,

I said, like, "This is something
that I've been through before

"and something I don't want to go
through again."

I'm surprised things aren't
going as great

as the last time I spoke to JJ, but
I understand what JJ's worries are

as he's been through them in the
past with his ex-girlfriends.

It's getting to the point now

where I feel like I've always got
a problem with her, and I feel bad.

I don't want to ask her to change.

I don't want to have to be the
person that, like,

dulls her sparkle.

When you first meet someone,

you're never going to look at the
negatives. Yeah.

So to find them, like, quite early
on,

it's obviously something that you're
going to have doubts on. Yeah.

But I always just sort of like try
and trust my gut.

And literally at this minute,

I don't actually know
what it's saying.

I want Ella in my life, definitely.

And I know that for a fact,
but it's just, like, how?

I took part in this experiment
because I was 100% ready

to find my person, my soulmate,
and I wanted to be someone's wife.

I am worried that whilst Paul's
being separated from me,

he may have let his friends
and family get into his head,

but me and Paul are good together.

We are a strong team.

I came into the experiment
looking for love,

to find someone to spend
the rest of my life with.

I asked the experts for a fiery
woman.

I got more than I bargained for.

She's made me smile.
She made me laugh.

But she's also made me really sad
at the same time.

After speaking to my friend, I
started questioning the decision.

If this does become an issue,

clearly, we're just not made
for each other.

I did put everything on the line for
this experiment, this relationship.

I have come to the decision
that is the best for me.

I am praying that Tasha understands.

It is a case of me opening up and
being honest,

and I'm not sure
how she's going to take it.

Today I'm just going to say what I
need to say and I could get hurt,

but I'm just hoping that me and
Tasha are on the same page.

Throughout this experiment,

I have learned that it is OK
to open up.

It is OK to be emotional.

I am putting my heart on my sleeve.

I hope Paul appreciates this.

I really don't want to get
hurt today.

I am very nervous about what Paul
is going to say.

You look amazing, by the way.
Thank you.

You look very handsome.

Paul,

I came into this experiment
hoping to find my soulmate.

When I first laid eyes on you,

well, my reaction said it all.

I was overjoyed and so grateful
that this beautiful, tall, handsome

black king was stood waiting for me.

How blessed were we to be paired
with each other?

I think it's fair to say that we've
had an amazing journey so far,

one that has been filled
with happiness and laughter.

However...

Oh, gosh.

..there have been times

where I've questioned
if I was right for you.

Am I too much for you?

Too loud, too opinionated, too bold?

I worried that this might not
be a relationship

you'd want to stay in.

This has played a massive part
in the decision I'm making today.

The question I had to ask myself
was, could I put my trust in you?

Could I really see a life
for us together?

Paul...

..you are one of the few people
who's come into my life

who I feel I can count on...

..who will never knowingly hurt me,

and who will never betray my trust.

You bring out the best in me.

You help me to be someone

who's not afraid to open
up and express their emotions.

Paul...

..I choose you now,

tomorrow and forever.

That was nice.

My turn now.

Oh.

Feeling nervous.

Tasha, I'll never forget the moment
when I turned around

and saw you walking down the aisle

will your beautiful long veil,

your stunning face,

your great smile.

I thought, "This is the woman for
me."

It was supposed to be one
of the most serious moments

of our lives yet.

We turned it into a moment
filled with laughter.

We've laughed a lot since that day.

But...

..our time together hasn't
been without its challenges.

These challenges have hurt me.

I had to think long and hard
about all the times we've clashed,

and what that said
about our relationship.

I started to question us,

to wonder if we were really a good
match.

I had to think long and hard
about all the times we've clashed

and what that said
about our relationship.

I started to question us,

to wonder if we were really
a good match.

However...

You have taught me so much
and given me so many opportunities

to learn and grow.

You have helped me become
a better version of myself.

I am so thankful for the life
we have created together.

On this day,

I vow to always support
and encourage you to grow

and reach for your dreams.

Tasha, I love you,

and I can't wait
to continue our journey together.

So, now it's just us
and the future.

There's no turning back now.

Who says I want to turn back?

I was always excited,

but the fact that we fully committed
to each other,

I'm actually buzzing for the future.

You're the best.

I've never felt so safe, so at home
with someone in my life.

Just a nice feeling to know
that I mean that much to someone.

You've been everything and more
that I could have asked for,

so thank you.

Coming into the experiment, I never
thought I'd be in this position

with someone that I didn't marry.

But meeting Ella,
it's been amazing for me.

Ella lights up any room
she walks in.

And that's kind of what I come
into this experiment looking for,

someone that makes me feel that way.

But if Ella and I continue
arguing,

we'll end up, like, disliking each
other.

It's just a difficult situation.

This experiment has been an absolute
roller coaster for me.

I married someone who just wasn't
for me,

and I didn't ever think
I'd meet someone like JJ.

It has been an adventure,

but I have definitely learned
so much about myself.

I'm not perfect, and I never
will be.

I feel that it's possible
to work on yourself

and be with somebody else.

I hope JJ feels the same.

I've finally learned what I want
and I need and I deserve.

This vow ceremony is like the
wedding

that me and JJ never got to have.

I hope that me and JJ are
on the same page.

I definitely have feelings for Ella.

I do think the decision
that I've made today

is the right one.

I'm just being true to myself
and putting my heart on the line.

I think you've just got to be open
and honest

to get the outcome that you want.

Hi. You OK?

I'm good.

You look lovely. Thank you, so do
you. Thank you.

I'm so nervous.

It's just very overwhelming.

JJ, we've been on such a journey
since we came into the experiment.

I got married and really tried
to make it work,

but I had a gut feeling my husband
wasn't willing

to fight for the relationship
in the same way I was.

Then this handsome, tattooed
Essex geezer walked in.

I couldn't keep my eyes off you
and wondered if you felt the same.

I instantly felt a spark
just by looking at you.

You accepted me truly for who I am

and accepted my transition
without any question.

Oh...

Being seen for Ella as Ella
without any judgement

is something
I never thought would happen to me.

I only dreamed of it as a child,

and you made me realise it was a
reality rather than a dream.

You are kind, funny, handsome
and I've never met a guy like you.

You're a special human
being with a big heart.

And I admire how open-minded
you are.

You make me a better person

because you inspire me to be proud
of my past

and not to see it as an issue or
something I should be ashamed of.

But it's not been easy.

I did feel pressure to be, speak

and act a certain way
to impress you.

I guess I was naive to think
it would be perfect the whole time.

You said you liked my crazy, loud
side,

but I think you like the idea of it.

And you're not the most
forward or open person,

which made me have doubts,

so that's something I've realised
I need.

Something I've learned is, everyone
needs to compromise

in a relationship.

You shouldn't have to change
each other.

I also have needs and wants

and shouldn't just settle because
someone accepts my transition.

You're so special to me.

I wanted it to be you.

But it isn't right now.

I'll never forget
you and what you've done for me,

which will change my life forever.

Oh, God.

You've done so much for the little
boys and girls like I once was.

I may not have found the one in you,

but I have found myself
and my worth.

I'm going home as a strong,
independent, proud woman

who has learned so much
for the better about myself.

I'll always have so much
love for you.

This is just really hard.

It's just hard.

Ella, the spark and connection I
felt

when I walked into my first dinner
party and met you

is something I'll never forget.

From that moment on, I knew my
experience in this process

was about to get turned on its head.

The moment we shared our first kiss,

it's a memory that will
always be special to me.

We came back into the experiment

in the hope we could create a bond
as strong as any marriage.

But these past few days,
I've been forced to ask myself

if you're the right woman for me
and if I'm the right man for you.

I think you're amazing.

I've learned so much from you.

But as things stand, I believe
becoming friends

is the healthiest thing for both of
us.

You are truly an inspirational
person.

You'll always, always hold
a very special place in my heart.

I hope we can remain in each other's
lives today

and for many years to come.

I'm always going to be here for you.

Thank you.

I feel quite sad
that things, I guess,

didn't work out how I wanted them
to.

But I don't think that we're
right for each other romantically.

SHE SOBS

But Ella's an inspiration.

She's a special person and...

Yeah, any time she needs sort
of anything or anyone,

I hope she knows that I will always
be there.

I'm so proud of her.

Like, she's amazing.

I didn't expect that to be as hard
as it was.

I feel sad, but deep down, I know
I've done the right thing.

It's fair to say JJ will always hold
a special place in my heart.

He's made me see that I am...

I'm good enough.

And I shouldn't just settle
for someone accepting me.

I should aim high.

I should ask for the whole package,
and I should be able to get that.

Having someone accept you when
you've always doubted yourself...

..it's the best feeling in the
world.

Next time...

Oh, hello there, honey!

..the whole group reunite
for one final dinner party...

Are you going to say hi
to your ex-wife? Fuck that.

..where they'll discover which
marriages have thrived...

Oh, my God!

..and which marriages have
floundered...

Oh! She's by herself.

..as old feuds reignite...

I love you so much.

This is the fucking worst.

I've had to watch you two being,
like, cuddly. What the fuck?

When you told me that you loved me
and you didn't have any feelings,

it's so deceitful to do
that to someone.

..new tensions come to a head...

All I'm asking for is for you
to tell me how you fucking feel.

..as a shocking rumour...

Was it the blonde or the brunette
that Jordan kissed?

Jordan kissed? ..threatens Erica
and Jordan's marriage.

No, she didn't kiss me before that.
That's what I mean!

Whoa!

But it's the return
of the honesty box...

I'm not having it any more.
I'm not having it any more.

..that fuels the biggest flare-up
of the night.

I can't do it.
Can you get that away from me?

I don't want to do this.

So there is a photo, Jordan, and
you've got your arm around her...

We had to get food...
..like a fucking dickhead.

I haven't done fuck-all wrong.

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