All language subtitles for Love.Island.Games.S01E10.1080p.WEB.h264-EDITH[eztv.re]_track3_eng

NARRATOR: This week saw
the launch of Love Island's,

sort of brand-new show.

With sort of brand-new Islanders
from all around the world.

Oh, my word.

* I was talking in the air *

NARRATOR: And sort of brand-new
host, Maya Jama.

I thought
one of the guys farted.

NARRATOR: On the line,
my favorite things, cash.

A hundred thousand dollars.

NARRATOR: Oh, and love.

You literally just flashed me
your tits on day one.

NARRATOR:
The bombshells detonated.

Steph walked right out...

- [gasps]
- ...Kyra walked right in.

- Hi.
- She looks tip-top.

- 9 x 7?
- 49.

No!

What was I gonna say?

Don't know where
you were going with that one.

- NARRATOR: There was game...
- [screams]

- NARRATOR: ...after game...
- Oh!

Let's fucking go, bitch.

NARRATOR: ...after game.

- [screaming]
- [laughing]

I found your wig.

NARRATOR:
It's been an epic week of drama.

- [screaming]
- So, take your marks.

- Oh my God.
- NARRATOR: Get set.

Get off me, I'm not a tree.

- NARRATOR: Go...
- Crazy.

NARRATOR: ...into Unseen Bits.

[screaming]

***

[theme music]

NARRATOR:
Welcome to Unseen Bits.

We're giving "Love Island Games"
an almighty shakeup.

[all screaming]

NARRATOR: With exclusive
unseen Islander action

that will leave you tongue-tied.

I'll give you half.

Why did I think you were
gonna say "I'll give you head?"

- Maybe, no.
- [laughing]

NARRATOR: We are showing you
all the extra, exclusive,

unseen goodies
from our Islanders.

[laughing]

NARRATOR:
With "Love Island UK" host

and all-round global goddess,
Maya Jama.

That is not gonna be
a good pick.

NARRATOR:
It's a full episode

that will have you exploding
with excitement.

Oh, my days.

NARRATOR: We've got a romance
worthy of Broke-Bed Mountain.

And truckloads of insects
up here.

- [gasp]
- You okay?

Oh, my God. A fucking fly
almost went in my ear.

NARRATOR:
We've got forgettable stunts.

Do something
that I'm gonna remember

for the rest of my life.

- What was that?
- That was so weak.

What the fuck [indistinct]?

NARRATOR: So, come and join

the world's greatest Islanders

on the world's greatest island.

Bloody hell.
What a place.

NARRATOR: As they compete
for true ca--

I mean, true love and cash.

This is "Love Island Games"
Unseen Bits.

[romantic music]

Some say Love Island's
nothing more than cheap,

trashy titillation.

And while we do appreciate
the compliment,

we also feature in-depth
cultural exchanges.

Isn't that right, Callum?

Is there a such thing
as a French kiss?

- Yeah.
- What is it again?

You gotta sit like back
to front or something, innit?

- What?
- It's like you want to see

what a real French kiss is.

A French kiss is like
when you go like, you sit here.

- What is going on?
- That's a French kiss, innit?

Bro, bro, bro, are you being
deadly serious right now?

- Yeah.
- For real?

- Yes.
- Yeah, you're sick.

I wanna talk about.
What are we talking about?

- Sit down Callum, please.
- What are you talking about?

Yeah, but you gotta sit,
you sit opposites, bro.

- You sit like this.
- No, no.

Now, you sit there,
you sit there, sit there.

I don't know,
but this is weird.

- What is going on?
- That's the French kiss.

- That's the French kiss, bro.
- I swear to God, bro.

- I'm from France.
- [all laughing]

I never heard about that.

What the fuck, bro?

He's got my boy mad.

That's so ridiculous. Honestly.

A French kiss is just like a--
like tongue in, no?

No, because there's actually
there's actually sofas

that are designed like that.

Yeah,
but why is that a French kiss?

No, no, we don't do that.
French kiss is kiss.

I'm from France.
You know what I mean?

NARRATOR: Oui, oui.

A French kiss is when you care
for someone intensively.

A Glasgow kiss is when someone
puts you in intensive care.

***

NARRATOR: "Love Island Games"
host, Maya Jama,

is the most glamorous woman
in the galaxy.

I was humbled to discover
she memorized an entire

passage from my autobiography,

Crying in a Portaloo:
The Iain Stirling Story.

It's very sad.

So I had these strings
on this dress,

and I went in the portaloo and
they dripped in the portaloo.

And I didn't realize, and then
upstairs when I was putting it

back on and I was like,
"I can smell shit."

- No!
- What the fuck is going on?

Yeah, there was shit
on my strings.

Oh, shit.

So I cannot wait
to get this off.

How mad? I thought one of
the girls farted and it was--

- Yeah, it was you.
- It was me.

What? So is there still shit
on the string now?

No, they took it off.
No, they took it off.

I'm thinking,
"Is that the string there?"

They cut it off.

Now you got, like, shitty hands.

No, it got cut. It got cut.

So to confirm,
the shit bit got cut off.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

It's over.
The story over already.

What, would you put that in?
I don't mind.

NARRATOR:
We definitely put that in.

It's jokes, innit?

NARRATOR: "Love Island Games"
hosts-- they're just like us.

I'm covered in [bleep]
right now.

[fanfare playing]

NARRATOR:
"Love Island Games" is like

the United Nations
of saliva swapping.

We actually hired
a villa translator

so the international Islanders

could better understand
each other.

Then we fired the translator

'cause it's just much funnier
this way.

Do you say "no" like "nor"?
Because I've been told that--

- Nor.
- Nor.

Yeah, with an R.

We mock y'all
so much in America.

Nor.

Honestly, we just love people
with accents.

Oh, it's mental, bro.
It is mental.
Yeah, it's different gravy.

What does that mean?
Happens to that.

Yeah, I'm gonna say you're
just gonna be like, "Word."

I apparently have been
walking around saying

that I'm gonna go
and take a shit.

- Wait, what?
- Beat shat.

That's what you've been saying?

Oh, my God, stop.

Beat shat?

You thought it was called
the beat shat?

- Yeah.
- No.

- Give me American.
- Okay.

All right, American.
American like.

Yo, so, what's up, dawg?

From the States, y'all.

Yeah, G., hot in here, G.

I got your back,
but that was shockingly bad.

- Is it?
- Yeah.

- Is that aloe vera?
- It's aloe vera.

Do you know what would be crazy?

Hmm?

Toby walking over there
goes [indistinct].

What? It was the accent
and the speed all at once.

- I was like what?
- Yeah.

I need to slow down my speaking.

All of you guys.
It's crazy.

Liberty is the worst.

Yeah, but I said this before.

- Liberty's from Birmingham.
- Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Where are you from again?

Birmingham in the UK, yeah.

- Burningham?
- Birmingham.

Oh.

But in the second jar,
I went on the violin.

- The second what?
- The second jar.

- Jar?
- Yeah.

- What's a jar?
- The second jar.

- What does that mean?
- Like--

Oh, second year?
Second year.

It is mad, isn't it though?

I feel like things
change hourly.

I'm sorry,
I do not understand a word.

Have I woke up speaking,
like, a different language?

Oh, my God, your slang is weird.

I reckon if you had
a lot of drinks in you,

I reckon you'd be a hard bird
to understand on a night out.

Coming from the Welsh boy.
[laughs]

How much wood
would a woodchuck chop

if a woodchuck could chop wood?

Yo, if I had your accent
in the States, ooh.

No one'd know
what the fuck you saying.

I feel like we're all
sort of coordinating tonight.

We didn't even plan it.

I didn't understand
what you were saying.

We'll get used to it.
The different accents.

NARRATOR: Ma heid's mince,
which is Scottish

and translates
to I'm very confused.

Which is exactly what
I am after watching that montage

full of what these people
call English.

On to some Unseen Bits
that we can actually understand.

The new couples paired off
for their first one-to-one chat,

and it was then that we learned
Callum is more open

- than this can of beer.
- [can opens, hisses]

Cheers.

I feel like when it comes
to like strength sort of stuff,

I'm there, but intellectual
stuff, I'm fucked.

- You know what I mean?
- Okay.

So hopefully we can kind
of balance each other.

- What about speed?
- Speed?

Do you wanna have a race?
Shall we?

- Come on, let's do it.
- All right. Okay.

Are we? I'm not gonna
pump you on a speed race.

You'll never catch me.

No chance, no chance, no chance.

What you-- you already know?

- Are you scared of losing?
- All right.

All right. [screams]

Okay,
why am I so clumsy today?

So you wanna race me?

- Where are we racing to?
- Okay.

I need to test out the speed,
you know what I mean?

- So far what you've done.
- So far we're even.

Like,
what we've got going on.

Yeah,
so we complement each other.

- Yeah, but this--
- So this is the last thing--

This is the moneymaker,
and then we'll know--

We need to make sure we're
starting from the same spot.

And then we'll know who's
carrying the team and ready.

Right. Three. Two. One.

- [screaming]
- Oh, shit.

- No!
- Gonna beat you always.

I'll beat you always.
I'll beat you always.

I'll beat you always.

- Beat you always.
- No!

-So basically--
-My boobs nearly fell out.

- They are out.
- [screaming]

I was like, "Are they then out?"

I was really trying hard
to not get a nip slip.

You literally just flashed me
your tits on day one.

God, mental.

I was trying to, like, you know,
play hard to get as well.

- Fuck me.
- All right.

So we can add strength,
uh, speed to my list too.

I think we can add
speed to mine.

- [sighs] Questionable.
- That was really close.

- It was close.
- I was winning at first.

I'm fucked. Endurance.
I'm struggling to recover.

- I'm fucked.
- I feel like I'm gonna
fall over again.

NARRATOR: I find the best way
to get to know someone

is just going looking
through their bins.

Steph prefers
to ask people questions.

What a weirdo.

I have a question.
I have a question for you guys.

What's the most embarrassing
time you had in your life?

The most embarrassing time
I've had in my life?

Yes. My mom has
walked in on me, uh...

- Oh, my God.
- No way.

Doing the deed.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Wait. Walked in on you
doing what?

Doing the deed?
Having well, in that case--

Okay, so my girlfriend, um,

I had her bent over the radiator
and we were both butt naked.

And, uh, yeah, we were just,
we were going at it then.

- Not going at it.
- Yeah.

We were going for it, and me mom
just-- normally she knocks.

She just
walked straight in on me.

- Straight in.
I mean, butt naked.
- What did you do?

Couldn't hide it.
I pulled out
and just covered up.

No. No way.

- I didn't keep going.
- Oh, my God.

That's like the worst, like,

position for your parents
to walk you in on.

You know, like doggy style.

'Cos you can't even
cover that up.

You can't even cover that up.
Do you know what I mean?

There was no pretending
that you were like playing

mermaids or something, like.

Mine was actually
on Love Island.

So, like, so I had sex
in the Hideaway, right?

I was watching--
rewatching the episodes back

with my mum and my dad,
and all my cousins.

And I didn't know it was
a hideaway episode, right?

So, like, it started airing.

All you hear is me going,
"Ah, ah."

And it just played on surround
sound, echoed the whole house.

My mum and dad
are just like this.

Okay. Yeah, that's actually--

My cousins were like this.

And I was sitting there like...

And you watched it
with your family?

- Yeah, bro.
- The bass going every time

you're hitting the wall--
"Doof, doof, doof."

Watching with your family
is crazy.

It's fucked.
They showed everything.

I love that.

Mine has to be,
I was at a bar in San Diego

and I had just met this guy.

What!

But we end up having
sex on the beach, right?

So we're like
butt naked going at it.

There was like a couple
going on like

a romantic walk on the beach.

It was like at night. Yeah.

So they caught, like,
us having sex.

Girl, like, screams.
We run butt naked.

- She screamed?
- Yeah, she was like screaming

- because she, like, heard us.
- Oh, shit.

And so we run away.

When we got in the car,
we, like, look back.

He had a setup

and we were going at it,
like, right next to their setup.

Like, he was, like, walking her
to, like, take her on like--

For the marriage proposal
or something.

No, there was a sign that said,
"Will you be my girlfriend?"

No way.
And you were fucking next to it?

And then we probably
ruined their whole,

like, boyfriend
and girlfriend proposal.

No, you made it
rememorable forever.

They'll never forget that, ever.

You made that for them.

We blessed their little--
their relationship.

Yeah.

NARRATOR: Liberty was on
season seven of
"Love Island UK",

and we just haven't had
the chance to catch up
since the show.

Naturally,
I sat down and asked her

all the hard-hitting questions.

Liberty, what's
your biggest turn-on in a man?

You know what it is?

Like, people think
I'm really weird

but I really like [bleep].

Am I weird for that?
I don't know.

NARRATOR: So what the bleep
did she say?

Don't go anywhere.

We'll find out
Liberty's big turn-on

right after this short, short,
ever so short break.

***

NARRATOR: At "Love Island Games"
Unseen Bits College,

you'll study building
cultural bridges

with absolutely
no French stereotypes.

Do you eat frogs?

NARRATOR: You'll debate
democratic voting.

Should we take votes
on who's gonna cry first?

Ooh, right.
Let's go.

NARRATOR: Perform
avant-garde theater...

and learn solo exorcism.

You can work out
in the invisible gym

and do whatever this is.

[beatboxing]

NARRATOR: Learn
to strut your stuff

but not how to be
a barber for cats.

I haven't shaved my puss
since I got in here. [laughs]

NARRATOR: So enroll
at "Love Island Games"

Unseen Bits College today.

Terms and conditions apply.

***

Before the break,
I was just catching up
with Liberty, actually.

And I asked her
a very casual question.

What is her biggest turn-on
in a man?

You know what it is?

Like, people think
I'm really weird

but I really like the [bleep].

Am I weird for that?
I don't know.

NARRATOR: So what the bleep
did she say?

You know what it is?

Like, people think
I'm really weird

but I really like
the big, dry hands.

But I like them to be
moisturized anywhere else.

But the big, dry hands,
the work hands for me.

I just think
it's so sexy. [laughs]

NARRATOR: Oh, Liberty
likes her blokes

the way
I like my antique clocks.

Big. Dry. Hands.

This is "Love Island Games",

and as much as our cast
is playing games,

so are our producers.

They didn't give our Islanders

a single night
to get settled in

and threw blindfolds
on them all on night one.

And had two secret bombshells
come in to steal a few kisses.

The islanders
whose partners were kissed

then had to prepare for a duel
to keep their other half.

You already saw a bit
of Jess and Liberty
preparing for the duel.

But believe it or not,
there are some bits
you didn't get to see.

Here is an extended version
of Liberty and Jess

studying up to fight
for their lives or couple.

Whatever.
It's the same thing, ultimately.

- What's 3 x 3?
- 9.

BOTH: Yeah.

- 4 x 4.
- 16.

Yeah.

- What's 7 x 3?
- [shudders] 21.

- Yeah.
- Yeah. [laughs]

- Okay, I got--
I got a tricky one.
- Okay.

- This one's gonna be
a hard one, okay?
- Okay. No.

- 9 x 7.
- 49.

- No.
- It's not?

- Wait, it's not 49?
- I think it's 63.

Four times--
no, 9 x 7.

What is the capital of France?
That's easy, isn't it?

- Paris?
- Yeah.

What is the capital
of America?

Washington.

- Yeah.
- Yes.

What is the capital of...

Africa?

JESSICA: Wait,
isn't Africa a continent?

- Yeah, I think so.
- Okay.

What is the capital
of Australia?

Capital of Australia?

- Sydney.
- No.

- Melbourne?
- No.

- Brisbane?
- This one's a hard one.

- Queensland?
- No.

- Golden Coast.
- No.

[laughs] Golden Coast.

One more. One more,
and I'll give you the answer.

I don't know
any more places in Australia.

Are you training each other up?

- Is that what you're doing?
- Yeah, we're trying.

- What's the capital
of Australia?
- It's berserk.

Because it's this random place
called Canberra, ACT.

Yeah, and no one lives there.

I'm like--
it's literally the map, like,

all the shit happens
on the beaches

around the whole island

and in this fucking--
[indistinct] the city,

it's just like a random
little village in the middle.

- [both laughing]
- And it's fucking tiny.

- It's tiny. Is it not?
- Yeah, true.

- How did they decide that one?
- I don't know.

I reckon it used
to be Sydney, didn't it?

- And then they just changed it.
- No. No, bro.

And then you know why?
You know why?

It's 'cause the fucking
prime minister lives there, bro.

So if the prime minister
moved to Sydney,
Sydney would be the one?

Probably, yeah.
I reckon that's how it works.

Wherever the prime minister is
that's the fucking capital.

No, that's not how it works.

Oh, my God, that's madness.
No way.

Because what happens
if the new prime minister
comes in like,

"Actually,
I want to live in Perth,"

and then we
all the offices--
have got to move to Perth

and everyone
that works in the government
have got to move to Perth.

Which is, like, 10 hours away.
That's not how it works, Jess.

- No?
- You're mental. You're mental.

NARRATOR: The cranial cram sesh
paid off big time.

For us. Not them.

The Duel was just
beating each other off...

a balance beam.

Get your heads
out of the gutters.

Bombshells Johnny and Megan
blew up Jess and Ray's game,

and they're the hot,
new default couple in town.

Let's check out
some more Unseen Bits.

***

The ASMR is the way
to get people feeling tingly

through sounds.

[indistinct whispering]

JESSICA: Oh, that feels so good
when you do that.

Do that again.

[Jessica laughs]

[indistinct]
ASMR. Isn't that the name?

- SMR? ASMR.
- ASMR.

[whispers] Hello, Islanders.

Do the people get,
like, off on that shit?

- JESSICA: Yeah,
you get tingles.
- Do they?

It's like, you know,
when you-- when you get, like--

I never understood it.

But, like,
when you hear ASMR,

it's like the equivalent
of feeling, like, goosebumps

when someone does this.

But you get it
through sounds

- LISA: Okay.
- That's mad.

[beatboxing]

That gave me goosebumps.

Spitting that shit.

Spit in my mouth.

- I spat-- I spat--
- I'm disgusted by that.

I spat in a guy's mouth once
when I was having sex with him

- because he pissed me off.
- [Lisa laughs]

And I went... [spits]
...in his mouth.

- I love that. I love that.
- In his mouth.

Wait, did you know
that the spitting thing

is, like, a witchcraft thing?

- And it's like--
- Shit, is it?

Yeah, I like-- love to,
like, read about that stuff

and apparently,
it's, like, a love spell.

So they're, like,
be wary of, like,

when men know to, like,
spit in your mouth during sex.

And, like-- it's like
sometimes they know, like,

it's, like, not a kink
but it's, like--

it's supposed to, like,
tie you to them.

Oh, my God.

That makes sense because
the guy's mouth I spat in,

he's, like, obsessed with me.

- Oh, my God.
- CELY: Girl, yeah.

You successfully did,
like, a witchcraft, like, spell.

- LISA: Wow.
- No.

CELY: So if you want him
to just be eating

out the palm of your hand,
just spit in his mouth.

- Noted. Noted.
- Noted.

NARRATOR: Noted?

We hear you, Cely,

but unfortunately, we found

that witch hats
were out of stock,

so we had to settle
for the next best thing.

Our most wanted challenge

had Islanders
casting spells left and right.

You can tell by their faces
they are falling in love.

[spitting]

- Mm. Mm-mm. Mm. Mm.
- Mm. Mm. Mm-mm.

Stop moving
the table too much

'cause the water's
going everywhere.

NARRATOR: Did you know
the game will be featured

at the upcoming Olympics?

The medals will be gold,

saliva and bronze.

CELY: I actually want to yak.

Yak a deedle deedle.

***

NARRATOR: Red alert!
Callum's chatting to Megan.

I can only assume
we're gonna need to bleep

something out somewhere.

Okay. Play on.

I don't know, I just never--
I just feel awkward in there

because I--
I've literally been there,
like, three or four times.

It's not much at all.
I just feel awkward.

I just feel-- I'm never
usually an awkward person,

but every time you're there,
I've just been so awkward.

Oh, my God. That's so funny.

When you come to the UK,
I want to take you [bleep]

Because I can't imagine
you being awkward.

I don't imagine.

I don't even feel myself
when I'm doing it.

It's fucked, Meg.
It's fucked.

It's like
I'm a different person.

I just feel vulnerable.

NARRATOR: What the bleep
did she say?

We'll find out
what makes Callum awkward

other than,
you know, being Callum

right after
this totally not awkward break.

***

NARRATOR: Welcome back to
"Love Island Games" Unseen Bits.

Before the break,
Callum revealed to Megan

the only place
he feels vulnerable.

But those bloody
producers bleeped it.

It's like,
I'm a different person.
I just feel vulnerable.

[bleep]

NARRATOR: So what they bleep
did she say?

That's so funny,
when you come to the UK,

I want to take you
to a strip club to see.

- Because I can't imagine you
being awkward.
- I don't imagine.

I don't even feel myself
when I'm doing it.
It's fucked.

It's like
I'm a different person.
I just feel vulnerable.

You're like--
when you can walk around and
you walk around your head's up

and you can tell a confidence--
confident guy

'cause he's just like--
he's just bouncing like that.

And that's what I'm like--
I'm, like, my heads up.

I'm always scouting out.
I like to be a peacock.

Everyone sees me.
I want everyone to look at me.

But when I'm in there,
I'm just kind of like...

You look like
you're a little boy.

Yeah, my arms are together like
that and when I'm sitting down,

I'm just like sitting down
and I'm just like--

You know what I mean?
Like I'm like--

You're like, don't look at me.
I'm shy.

Yeah, I don't know
where to look.

I'm just like,
"Oh, don't feel uncomfortable."

I like it.

NARRATOR: I also feel
vulnerable at strip clubs.

But once I start dancing

and guys cram dollar bills
in my thong,

it's a real confidence boost.

***

Unseen Bits
isn't all fun and games.

Sometimes our stories
about the Islanders

that we just don't have time
for in the main show,

but it really helps you
get to know them better.

So we are changing the mood
for a moment

while we learn
a little more about Johnny.

I have a question, number one.
What's this scar on your head?

Got struck by lightning.

No way.

- Yeah.
- How?

I was outside,
riding my bike,

and it started, like,
thundering and stuff outside.

And it started raining
really, really hard,

and I was, like,
riding-- pedaling my bike
back-- back to my garage

which is like, probably, like,
two blocks away at this point.

I'm going really fast
and out of nowhere,

everything just,
like, went black.

And then I woke up,
like, two years later.

Yeah, and I woke up
out of a coma

and my mom
was standing there

and she's like, "Johnny,
you got struck by lightning."

- What?
- Yeah.

I did not expect that.

I know,
that happened when I was 21.

What's it like
to be in a coma?

Like, what happens
when you wake out of a coma?

Ah,
it's kind of surreal.

Like,
it was just like--

It felt like I had just
went to sleep, and woken up--

- Two years later.
- Yeah.

Oh, my God.
That's so crazy.

That's fucking crazy.

No, but really,
what happened-- [laughs]

Oh, my God!

I was two,
I was like, three years old,

- and I was playing tag.
- [laughs] Oh, for fuck's sake.

I believed it.
[laughing]

NARRATOR: Aw,
who was I kidding?

Unseen Bits
is all fun and games

all the bloody time.

***

In the Scene Show,
we showed you a spicy dare game.

And as the kids say nowadays,
it was GIFfing shocked.

The Scene Show
didn't have time to show you
all the shocking dares.

But I snuck into
one of the editor's computers

and swiped some extra dares
just for you.

Check out these unseen dares
you definitely haven't seen.

"Fake an orgasm."

- Oh, shit.
- [Jack laughs]

Picture it in your head,
close your eyes, and picture it.

I'm gonna picture...

[moans]

[all laughing]

- No.
- CALLUM: That was--

Let's see,
getting to know the girls.

A three-way kiss
with your top two.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah.

CALLUM: The two Brits,
innit?

The two Brits.
The two Brits, you two.

Ow.

Make sure
it's sloppy, yeah?

[Justine cheering]

JACK: Keep going.

[all laughing]

- "Reveal your dirtiest secret."
- Make it filthy.

Once, I went
to a sex party,

and someone
I knew from home come up to me

whilst
I was mid-sexual activity.

And it was so awkward.

I was like--
They was like, "How are you?"

And I was like--
she, like, mid... doing bits.

[awkward silence]

I dare you to do

your favorite
sex position,

with emotion, with the person
you would couple up with.

Come on then. [laughs]

JESSICA: Ow! [laughs]

[all applauding]

Right here.

BOYS: Whoa!

[all screaming
in shock]

JESSICA: Whoo!

[all applauding]

NARRATOR: Liberty's
all shook up

after an encounter
with that decking.

That's D-E-C-K-I-N-G.

Back with more unseen debauchery
after this break.

***

NARRATOR: Welcome back to
"Love Island Games" Unseen Bits,

a safe place
for like-minded enthusiasts

for bits
that haven't been seen

who can meet
to consume more Unseen Bits.

Like this one.

Don't stress,
you can't stress with this stuff

'cause you don't know--
you don't even know what
twists and turns this place has.

It's got more twists and turns
than the game of Jenga.

- Is it Jenga?
- No, it's Twister.

- Twister, that's the one.
- Twister, with the mats?

- Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
- Yeah. Yeah.

- What's Jenga?
- Jenga's where you-- [laughs]

Where you're building,
where you're building.

- You got the bricks.
- Yeah, see, it's not Jenga.

It's not Jenga.
We're not playing Twister.

We're not playing Jenga,
we're playing--

What was I going to say?
Who's on my mind?

Don't know where
you're going with that one.

- No.
- Don't know where
we go with that one.

What was it?
What's that game where you put--

Jigs-- Not Jigsaw.
Yeah, Jigsaw.

Jigsaw. Jigsaw. Jigsaw.
Yeah, we're playing Jigsaw.

But we're so slow,
'cause we're both so dumb.

NARRATOR: Remind me never
to invite these two
to games nights.

***

This is "Love Island Games",

and as the name suggests,
there's love,

there's an island,
and there's games.

But the mightiest game of all
is Beach Hut Battle.

BOTH: Beach Hut Battle!

- Let's go, baby.
- [both laughing]

NARRATOR: It's
a civilized death match

for dominance
between the USA and UK.

- Let's do this, UK.
[battle cry]
- UK, UK, UK!

- USA all the way, baby.
- America.

NARRATOR: Team UK
is Toby and Curtis.

* God save
our gracious king *

NARRATOR: Team USA
is Justine and Cely.

- Whoo!
- I'm ready to win the game.

It's not even gonna be played,
because we're gonna be winning.

- Ooh, energy. Okay.
- [both laughing]

NARRATOR: Team UK will be
tested on American slang.

While team USA will be grilled
on terms from the UK.

The team with the most
correct answers wins.

I feel like we know
this line, pretty well, innit?

- Innit?
- [laughs] Yeah.

That's the extent
of how much we know.

NARRATOR: Both nations
are gagging for bragging rights,

so let's do this.

First question
is for the girls.

What is a quid?

England--
A quid is money.

It's a currency,
a coin?

How much-- Right?

Like a Quidditch cup
in Harry Potter.

[laughing] Girl.

- A quid is money or currency.
- Lock that in.

- Lock that in. Yeah.
- Lock that in.

NARRATOR: Ching, ching,
a quid is a British pound.

- Okay. We were right.
- Oh. Yeah!

NARRATOR: Across the pond,
it's the first question
for the boys.

In America,
what's a fanny?

"In America,
what is a fanny?"

"In the America,
what's a fanny?"

"In America,
what is a fanny?"

Is it like sliders?
No, that's, no, that's--

That's the Aussies,
they say "G-string."

Fanny pack?

- That's not [indistinct]
- No, no. That is.

It's the Americans who say
"fanny pack," yeah, yeah.

Yeah, it's a bum bag.

NARRATOR: So close,
but not close enough.

- [buzzer]
- That is incorrect.

A fanny is a butt
in American English.

A butt?

A fanny.

What? Well, that it does explain
why a bum bag is called

a fanny pack then
in America.

- Ah, geez.
- 'Cause a bum's fanny.

We should have
thought of that.

NARRATOR: The American girls
are up 1-0.

Girls, what is
a chinwag?

Oh, wait, I feel
like I know this.

A chinwag? Chinwag,
it sounds like an insult.

"You fucking chinwag,"
you know.

- Like, a dick, maybe?
- Yeah.

- Should we lock-- Chinwag.
- Lock in like, a dick
or asshole.

Yeah.

NARRATOR: That is
incorrect.

A chinwag is another word
for chat.

[both laughs]

- That makes sense.
- You got to chinwag.

'Cause your chin is wagging
when you're talking,
that makes sense.

You're gonna have
a good chinwag, innit?

I still think it sounds
like a dis.

"You fucking chinwag."

NARRATOR: Boys,
over to you in America.

What is a trunk?

- Ah!
- Oh, a boot of a car.

A trunk is a boot
of a car.

Yeah, like, in the trunk,
"Put it in the trunk."

- "Put it in the trunk."
- Yeah, junk in the trunk.

NARRATOR: That's correct.

[both cheering]

The score is now tied
one all.

Girls, over to you,
if someone in the UK

says "fanny,"
what are they saying?

- Fanny is--
- [Cely laughs]

Is it their vagina,
or is it their booty?

- It's that fat coochie.
- [both laughing]

Yeah, lock it in,
we're gonna lock in...

- Vagina.
- ...vagina.

- NARRATOR: Correct.
- [both laughing]

Nice. One thing
we gonna know is vagina.

Okay?
Okay. Period. [laughs]

NARRATOR: The girls
are now up 2-1.

The boys need
to get this next question

to tie it up
and force another round.

Boys, what is arugula?

- Arugula.
- Arugula.

- Arugula, like--
- You got arugula.

- You got, like, swag.
- I'm thinking a snake.

You know what,
with fanny being a bum,

and arugula
could be a--

Arugula, "You've got
a nice arugula."

A big old johnson,
yeah.

Right, we're locking it in.
Arugula means...

...penis!

NARRATOR: No, it's rocket,
I'm afraid.

- Oh, what?
- What?

"Have you seen
that arugula going up?"

NARRATOR: No, no,
not that kind of rocket.

- Like, the salad.
- Oh, rocket, the salad.

I thought it was a rocket,
like... [imitates whooshing]

- Ah.
- Arugula.

NARRATOR: Sorry, lads,
but the ladies from the USA

just kicked you both
in the "arugula."

That's right, baby! I mean,
I knew we were gonna win.

That's how we do it.
That's how we do it.

- Light work.
- Light work.

- What's up?
- [Cely laughing]

- Ah, my--
- We were crap, weren't?

NARRATOR: Join us next week
for another Beach Hut Battle.

***

In this Unseen Bit,
Cely's confession

is so interesting,
I almost didn't notice her

rudely putting
her shoes on my couch.

Come on, I've just
had them reupholstered.

- What's your body count?
- [both laughing]

- What's yours?
- No, what's yours?

- What's yours?
- Is yours, like, ridiculous?

- No, it's not.
- Mine is like, 21 to, like, 25.

- Okay, now say yours.
- Thirty-five.

That's respectable,
you know?

Enough to know
what you're doing,

but not like,
in the hundreds

where you're like,
just a fucking--

You'll fuck
anything that moves.

I feel like I'm a very
sexual person, like--

But, um,
I'm-- I'm about

to be
one-year celibate in--

- One year?
- Mm-hmm.

That's crazy,
you know?

I was like, "Let me just, like,
not hook up just to hook up."

- Yeah.
- And, I don't know,

after I hit,
like, one month, I was like,

"Wait, I kind of
like, feel really good,"

hit two months,
but, like, next thing I knew,

it was six months,
and I was like,

it's been half a year,
and then, at that point,

it became something like,
"Let me see how long I can go."

- The person I break--
- Breaks this for you.

Yeah, like, break celibacy with,
will be, like, someone

that I know cares about me,
and, like,

I know has potential of, like,
being in my life, you know?

A year's celibacy.
That's-- You know what that is?

That's
an interesting fact about Cely.

- [laughs] Yeah.
- And that's why

your name's Cely,
for celibacy.

[Cely laughing]

NARRATOR: And Toby
is short for...

"Toby or not Toby.

That is the question."

***

Hark, Lady Liberty
of Love Island Manor

has gathered
her most trusted chambermaids

to talk
titillating tattle.

In other words,
huge goss incoming!

You know what's, like,
really weird?

Like, sometimes,
I feel like [bleep] when I walk.

- What?
- LIBERTY: Is that really weird?

NARRATOR: But
what the bleep did she say?

Find out
this extremely important

dressing room news
when we come back.

***

["So Hot" by Lee Richardson
playing]

* Give it all that you got *

NARRATOR: Here at
"Love Island Games" Unseen Bits,

we've got unseen bits.

Oh, my God.
They have unseen bits.

NARRATOR: Affirmative.

We've got
solid gold unseen bits.

No "ifs" or "buts."

Actually,
there's a lot of butts.

I will distract you with my body
and destroy you with my mind.

NARRATOR: Mom says
the same thing.

Look,
it's an unseen bit!

Get off me,
I'm not a tree.

NARRATOR: And another.

Freestyle makes a nice change
from all the breast stroking.

So, slip into
some very strong unseen bits.

- Look at my muscles.
- JUSTINE: Girl.

***

[soft instrumental playing]

NARRATOR: Before the break,
Liberty called a very important

meeting with the other girls
who were getting ready for bed

to deliver
some shocking personal news.

You know what's, like,
really weird?

Like, sometimes
I feel like [bleep]
when I walk.

- What?
- LIBERTY: No,
is that really weird?

NARRATOR: But what the bleep
did she say?

Like, sometimes I feel like
I orgasm when I walk.

- What?
- LIBERTY: No,
is that really weird?

CELY: Okay. How do you do it?

- Give us some tips.
- MEGAN: Yeah, teach us how.

No, so, when I'm, like--
so when I'm, like,

running late for something

and my, like,
adrenaline is, like,

really, like, high,

and I feel like
I'm running late for something

or like I'm really tense,

like, my muscles,
my vagina muscles start, like,

moving.

Oh, my God. No way.

LIBERTY: Yeah. Is that weird?

- CELY: And then what?
It just happens?
- Yeah.

And then, like,
obviously, like, in public,

- I can't let it but like--
- CELY: You can't let it?

You say, "Relax.
Not now. Not now."

I would just be turning up late
to everything if that happened.

- What a superpower.
- MEGAN: I know.

NARRATOR: You heard it here
first, folks.

Liberty has superpowers.

My superpower is always
being able to conjure up

more of these unseen bits.

When he got dumped,
Steph left bereft,
but he cheered himself up

by wearing the biggest condom
in the villa as a hat.

But moments before that,

there was this unseen bit.

- [speaks French]
- [accordion music plays]

NARRATOR: We fired
the villa translator,

but I studied French for a day
and I'm pretty sure he said,

"This narrator is really cool."

Well said, Steph.

But it wasn't long
before Steph was replaced
by another French guy.

Who, it turns out,
wasn't a French guy at all.

It's a bit of a [indistinct]

- [gasps]
- [upbeat music plays]

NARRATOR: Callum
is such a fan of a sleep-in.

Pretty much anything
that happens before midday
is an unseen bit.

- RAY: You didn't even
see it, bro.
- What?

- Bombshell.
- Oh, fuck.

Her name's Kyra Green
from Ray's season.

Seems nice, bro.

- Seems nice.
- She's actually a bombshell?

- Yeah. Yeah.
- The girls
are showing her around.

- Fuck off.
- Swear to God.

CALLUM: You guys
are the worst liars in town.

Bro, a beautiful girl?
I swear to God.

- Hmm. That white bikini.
- CALLUM: Shut up.

Long, dark hair.

- JACK: Good to go, bro.
- JOHNNY: Listen.

Why-- why would they be
shouting like that?

Go up there now and say hello.

CALLUM: Oh,
there is another one up there.

JOHNNY: Yeah,
that's what we said.

NARRATOR: This is exactly
why I wake up

at 4:00 a.m. every morning.

Don't want to miss a thing.

More unseen bits, please.

She looks all right.
She looks tip-top.

***

NARRATOR: I have said it once,
and I will say it again,

the games part
of this Love Island

is actually important now.

And our Islanders are taking
the games very seriously.

Literally every single Islander

is taking it so seriously.

If you was a spy
and you had to walk--

walk into a room...

- Without--
without you seeing me?
- ...without me seeing you.

- Okay. Just sit there.
- Okay.

And I'm gonna come
right up to you

- without you seeing me.
- Okay.

- I'll pretend
I'm reading a newspaper.
- Okay.

[upbeat sneaky music plays]

Where is he?
I can't see him at all.

[both laugh]

You're doing all right.
You're doing all right.

You can't look at me.
You can't look at me.

I'm trying not to,
but it's hard

- when you [indistinct].
- Stop looking at me

- and open the newspaper.
- Okay.

Yeah, yeah, I'm doing that now.

- [Callum exclaims]
- [Liberty screams and laughs]

- Yeah, you know what?
You've done quite well there.
- Okay.

Okay, that was your strength.

You can be discreet
in some aspects,
that's good to know.

Fucking endurance
is not there though, is it?

NARRATOR: The name's Blond.
James Blond.

Callum's training
for the All Spies on Me game

was quickly thrown out
the window

because the blokes
just stood around doing nothing.

Here are some seen
and unseen bits

from our challenge,
All Spies on Me.

- I found your wig.
- [all laughing]

IMANI: Thanks, girl.

- MAYA: Oh, my God!
- [laughing]

That went straight
into my fucking eye, bro.

Like, into my eye, bro.

- WOMAN: I love the support.
- [laughing]

Well, Lisa, you did so, so good.

- Thank you.
- Thank you.

- You did all right.
- Thank you.

She hates swimming.

STEPH: Let's go!

- Energy.
- MAYA: Energy.

Energy in the water.

- IMANI: Yes, Cely!
- [all whoop]

- Yeah!
- [all whoop]

- [all exclaim]
- JESSICA: Oh, my God!

LISA: Oh, my God!

NARRATOR: 007
has a license to kill.

Unseen Bits
has a license to thrill...

you with this short
commercial break.

***

NARRATOR: Welcome back to
"Love Island Games" Unseen Bits.

You asked for more Love Island,

we gave you "Love Island Games".

You asked for more unseen bits,

we gave you so many
more Unseen Bits.

Shoe chef. No, sous-chef.
Sous-chef, Callum.

- Sous-chef.
- Sous-chef. What'd I say?
Shoe chef.

- Sous-chef.
- Sous-chef Callum
is in the house.

NARRATOR:
You asked for more gossip,

so now we are giving you

Unseen & Uncensored.

Hello. Hello. Hello.

NARRATOR: This week,
we asked the Islanders

- what their weirdest ick is.
- Uh.

NARRATOR: Other
than a Scottish narrator

breathing heavily
into a VO booth microphone.

[narrator breathes heavily]

Play the bit.

Wet doorknobs.

Why didn't you just
dry your hands a bit?

When guys shave
their whole body.

I mean, unless
you're in a swimming competition

and you're doing it
for, like, aerodynamic reasons,

why are you trying
to be silkier than me?

Like, drinking tap water
at the kitchen sink.

When guys have long toenails,

'cause if you're in bed
with them and, like,

they scratch you,
like, that's a lot.

Like, you don't really
want that.

Ah, ugly feet.
You know, corns, bunions.

You know what I'm saying?
Crust on the heels.

Oh, you know
what I'm talking about.

You know,
when somebody's toothbrush,

when they just leave it
to get super dirty

with all build-up of toothpaste
nonstop on it.

They just, like, leave it there
and it just gets dirtier
and dirtier

and they still use it.

When a dude thinks he's, like,
giving you sexy eyes,

and it's just, like,
the most awkward stare.

Like, he's just like...

When guys have big butts.

I genuinely feel like men should
not be allowed to wear socks

because they just, like,
look crazy, putting them on.

If you're not looking
after your nails...

what else
are you not looking after?

Salty lips?

Think of a man
putting on a dainty little sock

on his big-ass foot.

NARRATOR: Well, I don't think
I'll be shopping

at Dainty Socks anymore.

Now, an unseen bit of Callum
giving Liberty a geography quiz.

Fun fact, Liberty's wearing
exactly the same outfit I wore

when I auditioned for this gig.

What city in America
has that big, red bridge?

- New York?
- Nah, there's no bridges
in New York.

There's no bridges in New York?

Nah, there's no bridges
in New York.

Yes, there is a bridge
in New York.

There's no bridges in New York.
There's not a single bridge.

There's that big, red bridge
in New York, there is.

No, that big red bridge
is definitely not in New York.
It's in somewhere else.

- Brooklyn?
- No, it's not Brooklyn.

- San Francisco.
- Is it?

San Francisco, like this disco.

See,
that's not geography though.
That's your [indistinct].

Yes, exactly.
I can't believe that.

Give me a state in America
that's not, like, a city.

California.

California is a city, babe.

- Is it?
- I-- it's definitely a city.

It's too big not to be a city.

["Lovers for the Night" by
Aldous Finch, Calvin Yeah,
Margot Maxine]

NARRATOR: Speaking
of California,

we decided to fly Ariana Madix

all the way from Los Angeles
to Fiji

to grace us with her presence.

I can't believe
I'm gonna be watching
a challenge IRL

- in front of my face.
- Ariana,
I thought you were a bombshell.

[gasps] I'm like 40.

- No way.
- 38.

- No way.
- ARIANA: Yeah.

NARRATOR: Even the wasps
were excited to see her.

Whoa, my God. Oh, my God.

Okay. Sorry, it was a huge wasp.

NARRATOR: Hang on.
Isn't this show Unseen Bits?

Hey, producers,
show us the bits we didn't see.

Let's fucking go, bitch.

- Fucking hell.
- [whooping]

- I feel like a bitch,
but it makes me so happy.
- [screaming]

Not in the face.

***

Madness and badness.

I love it. Revenge is sweet.

[exclaims] Fuck this!

[screaming]

Spread your weight
over all four limbs.

Curtis keeps saying things
about spreading fingers and toes

and [indistinct]

What a game.

Someone help me, please.

I can't see nothing at all.

I feel like
I'm in Edward Scissorhands.

NARRATOR: That felt
like a lot of unseen bits

probably 'cause
it was a lot of unseen bits.

Join us next week for another
a lot of Unseen Bits.

***