Original subtitles

Previously on The Big Bang Theory...

So I told my mom

This is our wedding,

design the floral arrangements,

Thank you.

I mean, I-Im not trying

but... this is my specialty.

Everything okay?

Yeah, its just

I helped her install it.

You cant look at it.

Who the hell is this guy?

Ooh, let me see.

So youre still talking

Yes, and Im not gonna

And you need to delete

Because youre hiding

No, because you

How can I trust you?!

Then what are we doing?

I dont know.

Oh!

Aah,

sad man!

This is so great.

Why dont we do it

Because you have two kids,

I have Sheldon,

and Pennys apparently

cause damn, look at her!

Yeah, so impressive

to bounce back

Ah, another reason why

Youve come

I check the door

There are no traps.

I use my wizard eye

to see whats on the

Hey, thats sort of like how

to spy on your fiancée.

No, its nothing like that.

Your wizard eye

Oh. Is it alone and unloved?

I guess.

I open the door and say,

I have a bottle

Oh, we didnt order this.

Its from the gentleman

Oh. Well, if we drink it,

were making a promise?

Cause I am happily married,

Were not gonna do anything.

Really?

Why dont you just

you guys can work this out.

I dont want to talk about it.

Okay, the cyclops tells you

that the enchantress

at the Inn of the Dwarven Lords.

Really? An inn?

Anu is a concierge at a hotel.

Thats a little insensitive,

dont you think?

I hadnt noticed that

Well, now that Ive

Bad.

Shame on you.

Hey, ladies.

Zack!

Hi. You guys

Of course.

Did-did you

I did. I asked for the

They said it was $200,

and I said

more

expensive one.

And then, they said it was $300.

But it-it was the same...

Dont.

Thank you, but you shouldnt

Nah.

Its cool. I sold my company

And then I bought a boat.

Then I got married.

Guess where.

On your boat?

No, but that wouldve

Well, congratulations.

Hey, you and Leonard

should come over and have

Yeah, that would be so nice.

Leonard was just saying

with one of your ex-boyfriends

Well, then this worked out

Oh, yeah.

♪ Our whole universe

♪ Then nearly 14 billion years

♪ The Earth began to cool

♪ The autotrophs began to drool,

♪ We built the Wall

♪

We built the pyramids

♪

♪ Math, Science, History,

♪ That all started

♪

Bang!

♪

Hey. How was game night?

Oh, off the charts.

Literally.

it wasnt on any

Thats funny.

Wow. I should not have

How was ladies night?

It was fun. Amy got drunk

that Sheldons chest is smooth

Well, it does squeak

And we ran into Zack.

Oh. Yeah? Hows he doing?

He got married.

Oh. Well, thats nice.

Yeah, and he sold his company

Huh.

And you ended up with me,

Wait. Youre not

What? Oh, absolutely not.

In fact, he should be jealous

Oh.

And a dungeon with over 30 rooms

because no one thought

under the wizards throne.

Oh. You know, Id

Really?

Mm-hmm.

Well, Ill get the dice

Go away, Raj!

What are you doing?

style.

I dont know what that means.

Really? Youve never

Love Actually?

If you want to watch it

I have nothing to say to you.

Look, we both made mistakes.

I am so sorry that

I didnt mean to, but

Now, do you want

You also said you dont trust me

I really thought this would be

Honestly, Raj, why do you even

You know, family

Heres what I think.

All of your friends are married,

and you dont want

And honestly, thats not

Uh, okay, well, how

than what youre doing? Hmm?

Worried that you wasted

so many years dating the

youre just looking

Youre right.

Okay, so we agree.

Yeah.

Wait. What did we

That we shouldnt

You know what?

Why dont you shut the door,

Uh, do you remember

Leonard, I remember all

If youd like, I could

No, thank you.

Fun fact.

Zack would be

but she also dated two Zekes.

Well, apparently,

for a ton of money and retired.

And that bothers you?

I dont know. I mean...

I guess so. Yeah.

It doesnt seem fair.

I work hard.

Im really smart.

Ive made substantial

But Zack gets to be rich,

while Im still working

Well, a lot of people

That doesnt seem to bother you.

Sultan of Brunei,

Whos that?

Hes one of the first

Yeah, well, I dont

have to hang out

Well, thats too bad.

He helped create

Oh, the stories he could tell.

Penny told him wed go have

on their stupid boat.

Well, just tell her

Well, then, shell think

So you want to seem

I make one mistake, and she says

Like she never

Did she?

Well, she agreed to marry me.

Honestly,

I think you dodged a bullet.

I dont think

Howie, shh.

What?

You cant bad-mouth Anu.

Theyre gonna

and youre gonna look

I mean, remember

when we broke up, and Penny said

What did she say?

I dont want to get into it.

Some of it was hurtful,

So Im just supposed

I dont want you to lie to me.

No ones gonna lie to you.

She says

the only reason Im marrying her

is because

and I dont want

Oh, thats nonsense.

No.

Shes right.

So, Marissa, how

did you guys meet?

Oh, its a pretty

We met in a bookstore.

That

is

funny.

Yeah, I was just there

but this one had a stack

Oh. So, you really like to read?

Oh, no. I work there.

Yeah, she is super smart.

Seriously, you name,

shell tell you if

Go on, try her.

Oh, uh, well, uh...

Catcher in the Rye.

Nope.

I guess we both like nerds.

So, uh, we gonna

Nah. Its a little

Yeah, thats okay-- this is

Its actually kind of peaceful.

Well, its a beautiful boat.

Thanks, man.

We love it.

Although, hes so tall

almost every time

After the first couple,

Where are our manners?

Zack, lets get our guests

Oh, you got it, babe.

Are you jealous?

I know, I know,

Hes super sweet.

Oh, its driving

Really?

Yes. I was trying

like it wasnt so you

Wha-- turns out

I love you so much.

Aw.

Cheers, guys.

Aw, thanks.

Thank you.

So listen, I got

We sort of have another reason

We want to have a baby,

but we cant do it

because of the game me and

where we kicked each other

But the doc says

We just dont know.

Huh.

You went to college.

And Zacks

because youre

Okay, whoa, whoa.

Whoa, whoa. You know, this

Lets all just stop before

Leonard, would you be

Aw, you said a thing.

Wow, this is

And also really weird, right?

you dont get to...

No, I...

I got it.

Just because I slept

with your wife doesnt mean

We... we get it,

but... thank you

Youre welcome.

I know its a big ask,

really dont want

I know.

...sperm.

And Zacks always talked about

I...

I really

Really? You dont know

You know, I-I think we

Oh, yeah. Definitely,

Take your time.

He means privately.

Right. Sorry.

Sure. Yep.

Come on, Zack.

Okay. Yeah.

Okay.

You really think

Theres nothing

Ow!

Hello, Daddy.

Did you install a camera

No!

Thats what her parents told me

when they said they

But I told them you would never

I mean, I did install a camera

and I did spy on her, but I did

to

spy on her.

Well, thats not going

our

story.

Our story is that shes a liar.

And-and old.

An old, dirty liar.

Oh, no.

Im the one who screwed up.

Well, dont say that to

them.

Shes bad. Youre good.

They have to pay me back

I should have...

So youre saying

Fine. Then Ill call her parents

and well straighten

I dont think

And honestly...

she deserves someone better.

Rajesh, you need to stop

Youre a good man.

Y-Youve never told me that.

Youre also a dope.

But your hearts

and you deserve happiness.

So you just need to figure out

and if that means cancelling the

But figure it out quickly,

my next birthday

and marigolds than I expected.

And Leonard just stood

like he was watching a puppy

Well, I can see how hed

Its not flattering.

Well, something can be both

and

creepy.

You know, just the other night,

looked like

Really? So

if someone wanted to use Sheldon

Oh, absolutely not. I am

So Leonards

Yes. We got in a

He said, well, if I

then why shouldnt someone else

What?

Well, there is

to pass on your genes.

Its only natural.

So youre on his side?

Well, viewing

its perfectly

But viewing him

And we hate him.

Really? Zack

your genetic material

Yeah. So Id be helping out a

and they were gonna pay us,

That doesnt make

They wanted

you?

(video game tires screeching,

Yes, Sheldon,

Im smart. Im nice.

Im smart. Im nice.

And I can eat cheese

Are you upset he

Of course not. I just

that of all the people

Well, he does.

I dont see why Penny

Well, perhaps Pennys worried

the emotional toll of knowing

who is biologically yours

Wow, thats

Yeah, Im taller than you

Those people are crazy.

Come on, I know youre there,

Youre just making this harder.

Look...

you were right.

I was doing this for

You deserve to marry

how amazing you are...

because he doesnt want to spend

Not... not because he wants

Thank you.

And I want you to know, I

Raj, Im not gonna marry you.

Im not asking you to.

Then why are you here?

Because I like you.

Okay? I like you.

I-I like you enough

at the beginning,

So...

will you go out

Okay.

But I warn you,

I just got out of

and I might complain

Maybe hes being weird

Hey.

Hi.

Where you been?

Just out.

All right, look, um...

Im sorry that we fought before.

I know this is

and if you dont want me

Really?

Yeah.

Were a team.

Ill be right back.

What is that?

Its a sample cup.

Really? Cause it looks like

Its the closest thing

Its a gesture. Shut up.

All right, sorry.

So... are you saying

but... when I told you

you didnt have a say

maybe I dont need

Thank you.

They couldnt have picked

Are you calling Zack?

No, Sheldon. Would you say

Oh, my...

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