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Previously on "Girlfriends'
Guide to Divorce"...
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I'm sad, and I'm tired, and I'm stressed.
3
00:00:06,107 --> 00:00:08,975
- Take a frickin' break.
- I can't, Jo. I cannot.
4
00:00:08,977 --> 00:00:10,894
I just need to finish my book this week.
5
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I am so close to being done.
6
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I was diagnosed... Social anxiety disorder.
7
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Doesn't that just mean you're shy?
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Debilitatingly shy.
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I thought that we
weren't getting emotional.
10
00:00:19,428 --> 00:00:20,810
Well, then we should've thought about that
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00:00:20,835 --> 00:00:23,959
before you stuck your funky love
cruffin inside of my pastry box.
12
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What you really want is an audience
13
00:00:26,486 --> 00:00:27,833
for your fabulous life.
14
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So you should just go get that
15
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because that sure as hell isn't me.
16
00:00:30,975 --> 00:00:32,474
It seems like we're done here.
17
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- Charlene... she left me.
- Wait. What?
18
00:00:35,419 --> 00:00:37,919
For that goddamn German tennis pro.
19
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Because I love you.
20
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I only want to be with you too.
21
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What about you and Gordon?
22
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I'm sick and tired of playing along
23
00:00:44,504 --> 00:00:46,371
with this perfect-wedding crap.
24
00:00:46,373 --> 00:00:47,956
This whole thing has just been a crock
25
00:00:48,008 --> 00:00:50,175
since you started screwing Albert.
26
00:00:50,210 --> 00:00:52,510
If you're gonna marry
anybody, I want it to be me.
27
00:00:52,546 --> 00:00:54,546
- I'm sorry, Albert.
- Don't diminish this.
28
00:00:54,598 --> 00:00:55,964
Albert, be reasonable.
29
00:00:56,016 --> 00:00:57,882
You're telling me that I'm
never gonna have this again?
30
00:00:57,884 --> 00:00:59,356
Yeah, that's exactly what I'm telling you.
31
00:00:59,381 --> 00:01:00,421
Go, run off to a new city,
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but you're still gonna want your freedom
33
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because that's who you are.
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You should seriously
reconsider being a part
35
00:01:05,811 --> 00:01:07,010
of my wedding.
36
00:01:09,134 --> 00:01:14,513
_
37
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♪ Here comes the bride ♪
38
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- Thank you for this, Phoebe.
- Oh, are you kidding?
39
00:01:24,764 --> 00:01:26,044
I love that you guys
aren't seeing each other
40
00:01:26,069 --> 00:01:27,380
until the ceremony.
41
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It's so... deliriously romantic.
42
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Does my milk bath await?
43
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She's been like this all morning.
44
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That's enough. I just want to get married.
45
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Aww.
46
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Have you told Phoebe
about the great apartment
47
00:01:37,788 --> 00:01:39,169
- we found in New York?
- I don't want to hear it.
48
00:01:39,194 --> 00:01:40,442
I'm gonna miss you so much.
49
00:01:40,467 --> 00:01:42,356
Phoebe, you would die.
50
00:01:42,480 --> 00:01:45,598
It's this amazing Tribeca
loft. It overlooks the Hudson.
51
00:01:45,763 --> 00:01:48,208
- Oh, my God.
- It's to die.
52
00:01:48,233 --> 00:01:50,372
Oh, God. It's work again.
53
00:01:50,439 --> 00:01:52,973
Somebody hasn't been
back to pick up her files.
54
00:01:53,213 --> 00:01:55,122
Honestly, I know why she's avoiding it.
55
00:01:57,166 --> 00:01:59,778
You hate saying good-byes.
56
00:02:03,178 --> 00:02:04,294
Well, work calls.
57
00:02:04,319 --> 00:02:05,755
Say hi to Abby and Jo for me tonight.
58
00:02:05,780 --> 00:02:07,246
Abby's...
59
00:02:07,750 --> 00:02:08,750
She's got a...
60
00:02:08,775 --> 00:02:10,891
Abby is so... she's so busy.
61
00:02:10,916 --> 00:02:12,778
- She's got a deadline.
- She's got so much work to do.
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00:02:12,803 --> 00:02:13,630
Whatever.
63
00:02:13,655 --> 00:02:14,755
Whatever. Come here.
64
00:02:14,780 --> 00:02:16,231
I love you, okay? I love you.
65
00:02:16,256 --> 00:02:17,657
- I love you.
- Thank you.
66
00:02:17,682 --> 00:02:18,450
Bye. Yes, you're welcome.
67
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- Bye.
- Bye.
68
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Was I not supposed to say anything?
69
00:02:20,452 --> 00:02:21,364
- It's okay.
- Sorry.
70
00:02:21,389 --> 00:02:23,255
I'll give you a pass, but listen...
71
00:02:23,667 --> 00:02:25,005
no more Abby talk, okay?
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00:02:25,209 --> 00:02:27,493
- Don't know who she is.
- Yeah.
73
00:02:38,722 --> 00:02:41,021
Sorry. I'm... I'm... I'm using this.
74
00:02:49,016 --> 00:02:51,294
Thank you.
75
00:03:00,578 --> 00:03:01,860
Yikes.
76
00:03:01,912 --> 00:03:03,862
It looks like "A
Beautiful Mind" up in here.
77
00:03:03,864 --> 00:03:05,091
Hey, did you get that copy I sent you?
78
00:03:05,116 --> 00:03:06,763
I did. That's why I've been calling.
79
00:03:06,818 --> 00:03:08,484
Oh, yeah, I'm sorry I
didn't get back to you.
80
00:03:08,536 --> 00:03:11,074
I just... All over the place,
81
00:03:11,099 --> 00:03:13,925
but guess who's almost done with her book.
82
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Me!
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My deadline's in two days, but
just one quick revision pass
84
00:03:17,162 --> 00:03:18,244
and I think I can send it in.
85
00:03:18,296 --> 00:03:19,462
And the kids are at school.
86
00:03:19,497 --> 00:03:20,997
So, once the book is off my plate,
87
00:03:21,022 --> 00:03:22,872
I am all about SheShe all the time.
88
00:03:23,635 --> 00:03:26,464
All right, well, I had
some notes and thoughts.
89
00:03:26,489 --> 00:03:27,970
Should I just email them to you?
90
00:03:28,006 --> 00:03:30,673
Um, that would be fab. I'm
just a multitasking mama.
91
00:03:30,675 --> 00:03:31,841
And I sent you an article.
92
00:03:31,843 --> 00:03:33,676
There's definitely a piece in it.
93
00:03:33,678 --> 00:03:36,145
You know the whole "can a
woman have it all" conundrum?
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00:03:36,181 --> 00:03:37,480
I hate that conundrum.
95
00:03:37,515 --> 00:03:39,015
Well, you're not alone.
96
00:03:39,067 --> 00:03:40,933
There's a new survey that just came out,
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00:03:40,985 --> 00:03:44,187
and it says today's woman can't
even think about having it all.
98
00:03:44,189 --> 00:03:46,322
She's just worried about
doing the shit she needs to do
99
00:03:46,357 --> 00:03:47,690
without losing it.
100
00:03:47,692 --> 00:03:50,159
You know, she's worried about cracking up.
101
00:03:50,552 --> 00:03:51,747
Answer...
102
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carbonated caffeine.
103
00:03:55,200 --> 00:03:56,575
Oh, yes.
104
00:03:56,918 --> 00:03:59,952
Actually, ma'am, you've
been here since we opened,
105
00:04:00,004 --> 00:04:02,038
and you haven't purchased anything yet.
106
00:04:07,138 --> 00:04:08,515
Okay, well, you know what?
107
00:04:08,778 --> 00:04:12,052
We're gonna have two coffees,
one of which will be to-go.
108
00:04:12,552 --> 00:04:14,217
- Thank you.
- Yeah.
109
00:04:14,677 --> 00:04:19,031
So I thought you might be able to relate...
110
00:04:19,567 --> 00:04:20,839
to the study.
111
00:04:20,864 --> 00:04:21,774
Oh, my God, yeah.
112
00:04:22,185 --> 00:04:23,652
And I'm sorry that I've
been all over the place,
113
00:04:23,677 --> 00:04:25,228
but Jake comes back from Latvia tomorrow,
114
00:04:25,230 --> 00:04:26,562
and then he's taking the kids,
115
00:04:26,564 --> 00:04:28,781
and then I can finally
get this off my plate,
116
00:04:28,817 --> 00:04:31,606
do all those changes, and I
can think about the next piece.
117
00:04:32,349 --> 00:04:35,839
All right, well, have you called Delia?
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00:04:35,864 --> 00:04:39,052
'Cause you all need to
make up before her big day.
119
00:04:39,528 --> 00:04:41,761
I think I'm gonna sit that
one out... the wedding.
120
00:04:41,786 --> 00:04:43,706
Sit it out? You're a bridesmaid.
121
00:04:43,731 --> 00:04:46,394
Yes, but I, uh... I
actually meant what I said,
122
00:04:46,419 --> 00:04:47,719
and Delia made it pretty clear
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00:04:47,754 --> 00:04:49,254
that she didn't want me there, so...
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00:04:49,306 --> 00:04:51,506
And I make it pretty clear
that I think my sister
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00:04:51,508 --> 00:04:54,892
is a thirsty ho for stealing my husband,
126
00:04:54,928 --> 00:04:57,228
but I'd still like an apology.
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00:05:00,066 --> 00:05:03,513
-- Synced and corrected by ChrisKe --
-- www.addic7ed.com --
128
00:05:08,646 --> 00:05:10,024
What?
129
00:05:10,026 --> 00:05:12,076
I thought that Alex was
coming in this morning.
130
00:05:12,112 --> 00:05:14,245
Mm, nope. Change of plans.
131
00:05:18,702 --> 00:05:19,751
Is there a problem?
132
00:05:19,927 --> 00:05:21,703
Yeah, there is, actually.
133
00:05:21,705 --> 00:05:23,087
It's about respect.
134
00:05:23,123 --> 00:05:24,539
I'm fed up with cleaning
up after customers.
135
00:05:24,591 --> 00:05:25,673
That's Alex's job.
136
00:05:25,709 --> 00:05:27,542
My job is very specific.
137
00:05:27,544 --> 00:05:29,877
I'm here for one thing
and for one thing only.
138
00:05:29,929 --> 00:05:31,212
- Screw people?
- Bake.
139
00:05:31,677 --> 00:05:32,430
Oh.
140
00:05:32,481 --> 00:05:33,931
You care to explain why
you're acting like such
141
00:05:33,967 --> 00:05:35,516
a bloody clam shiner?
142
00:05:35,739 --> 00:05:37,224
I don't know what you mean...
143
00:05:38,083 --> 00:05:38,936
literally.
144
00:05:38,972 --> 00:05:41,192
Jo, you've hardly even
looked at me this morning.
145
00:05:41,391 --> 00:05:42,440
Okay.
146
00:05:42,475 --> 00:05:43,725
I don't have time for games.
147
00:05:43,777 --> 00:05:45,226
I'm here to do my job.
148
00:05:45,278 --> 00:05:46,728
Part of being a professional
is leaving your feelings
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00:05:46,780 --> 00:05:48,380
at the door.
150
00:05:48,405 --> 00:05:50,497
Right, 'cause that's clearly
what you're doing right now.
151
00:05:59,743 --> 00:06:01,044
Oh, my God.
152
00:06:03,963 --> 00:06:05,123
Don't look at me like that.
153
00:06:17,614 --> 00:06:19,904
_
154
00:06:29,606 --> 00:06:31,022
This is Abby. Leave a message.
155
00:06:31,074 --> 00:06:32,357
Still no answer.
156
00:06:32,409 --> 00:06:33,716
Um...
157
00:06:34,661 --> 00:06:36,194
I really struggled making this call,
158
00:06:36,246 --> 00:06:38,794
but, Abby, on behalf of Delia,
159
00:06:39,082 --> 00:06:42,310
she is getting married tomorrow.
160
00:06:42,836 --> 00:06:45,536
On... on behalf of me, I'm just...
161
00:06:45,588 --> 00:06:47,255
I'm so disappointed in you.
162
00:06:47,791 --> 00:06:50,041
The Abby I know would never disappear
163
00:06:50,093 --> 00:06:51,419
on a friend like this.
164
00:06:52,879 --> 00:06:55,075
All right. Bye.
165
00:06:55,888 --> 00:06:57,505
I'm so disappointed in you.
166
00:06:58,301 --> 00:07:00,468
The Abby I know would never disappear
167
00:07:00,520 --> 00:07:01,794
on a friend like this.
168
00:07:02,138 --> 00:07:03,958
All right. Bye.
169
00:07:04,414 --> 00:07:05,950
End of messages.
170
00:07:16,050 --> 00:07:17,683
What am I supposed to do?
171
00:07:17,728 --> 00:07:19,527
I mean, seriously, if I went at this point,
172
00:07:19,552 --> 00:07:21,719
it would just upset everyone,
and I have to finish my book,
173
00:07:21,744 --> 00:07:23,718
and I'm just trying to get
it all done, and it's, like...
174
00:07:23,743 --> 00:07:26,711
Don't... don't give me that look.
175
00:07:29,162 --> 00:07:31,263
Lick your balls or something.
176
00:07:37,392 --> 00:07:39,692
_
177
00:07:41,975 --> 00:07:44,653
Hello. Hi. Is everything okay?
178
00:07:45,098 --> 00:07:46,347
Charlie's cup for baseball?
179
00:07:46,349 --> 00:07:47,552
He has a cup.
180
00:07:47,947 --> 00:07:51,022
Okay, listen, I'm so
sorry, but I am crazed.
181
00:07:51,047 --> 00:07:52,513
No, I'm on deadline.
182
00:07:52,538 --> 00:07:54,582
He needs it now, or he comes home?
183
00:07:55,302 --> 00:07:57,859
Okay, um...
184
00:07:57,861 --> 00:07:59,243
I...
185
00:07:59,279 --> 00:08:01,763
I will get there with
a cup before practice.
186
00:08:01,788 --> 00:08:03,237
All right, bye.
187
00:08:19,873 --> 00:08:21,224
Hey.
188
00:08:21,349 --> 00:08:23,399
Hey, this sack of potatoes
is looking for his wife.
189
00:08:23,434 --> 00:08:25,735
Screw me in the eyeball.
Are you frickin' kidding me?
190
00:08:25,770 --> 00:08:27,820
- He says he owns the place.
- Did he?
191
00:08:27,855 --> 00:08:29,522
Did he also tell you he's Pope Francis?
192
00:08:29,574 --> 00:08:30,833
Baby bird, I knew we'd find you.
193
00:08:30,958 --> 00:08:32,692
It's Jo. Frumpkis, come on.
194
00:08:33,537 --> 00:08:35,302
- You've got to get it together.
- Oh, I love you, sunshine.
195
00:08:35,327 --> 00:08:36,419
It's Jo. She left you.
196
00:08:36,444 --> 00:08:38,550
She left you, and so help me God,
197
00:08:38,575 --> 00:08:39,919
if you do anything to hurt our child,
198
00:08:39,944 --> 00:08:41,770
I will rip your liver out with my...
199
00:08:41,795 --> 00:08:43,378
Hey, hey, okay, okay, Sid and Nancy...
200
00:08:43,403 --> 00:08:44,486
With my bare frickin' hands.
201
00:08:44,511 --> 00:08:45,856
Someone needs to pay me his $300 bar tab,
202
00:08:45,881 --> 00:08:46,950
or I'm calling the cops.
203
00:08:48,956 --> 00:08:50,146
Put the... put the pastry down.
204
00:08:50,171 --> 00:08:50,919
- What?
- Put it down.
205
00:08:50,944 --> 00:08:52,226
Put the pastry down.
206
00:08:52,251 --> 00:08:53,161
- Come on...
- When are you gonna...
207
00:08:53,186 --> 00:08:54,396
You're defiling my creations.
208
00:08:54,421 --> 00:08:56,651
Stop getting trashed
and eating like the mom
209
00:08:56,676 --> 00:08:57,677
from "Gilbert Grape"?
210
00:08:57,702 --> 00:08:59,346
I got this. I'm gonna take him home.
211
00:08:59,388 --> 00:09:00,949
- I'll get the van.
- No, no, no, you stay here.
212
00:09:00,974 --> 00:09:01,981
I've got this. I've got this.
213
00:09:02,006 --> 00:09:03,278
Jo, we've handled him like this before.
214
00:09:03,303 --> 00:09:04,919
Scott, my daughter's
supposed to have dinner
215
00:09:04,944 --> 00:09:06,276
with this human garbage can tonight.
216
00:09:06,312 --> 00:09:07,871
I've got to clean him up,
I've got to put him to bed,
217
00:09:07,896 --> 00:09:09,446
and I have to come up with some kind of lie
218
00:09:09,482 --> 00:09:11,965
as to why her father's MIA.
219
00:09:12,001 --> 00:09:13,653
So excuse me for not wanting
to hang out right now.
220
00:09:13,678 --> 00:09:15,713
- Jo.
- You are giving me whiplash.
221
00:09:15,738 --> 00:09:17,544
A week ago, you go out
of your way to be a dick.
222
00:09:17,569 --> 00:09:19,560
You practically rip my head off earlier,
223
00:09:19,585 --> 00:09:21,544
and now you're playing Mr. Concern, man?
224
00:09:21,700 --> 00:09:23,533
- Just let me...
- Really?
225
00:09:27,239 --> 00:09:28,794
We're out of here. Come on.
226
00:09:28,819 --> 00:09:30,769
Get up. I need you to get up, please.
227
00:09:30,794 --> 00:09:32,960
I own this place.
228
00:09:35,211 --> 00:09:37,261
- Hey.
- Hey.
229
00:09:37,286 --> 00:09:39,458
I thought you were packing up your office.
230
00:09:39,483 --> 00:09:42,849
Yeah, I have decided to let my
assistant just handle it all.
231
00:09:43,153 --> 00:09:45,370
- Piece of cake.
- Oh, mama, it ended that badly?
232
00:09:45,395 --> 00:09:47,403
Let's talk about today!
233
00:09:47,428 --> 00:09:48,928
Okay, let's.
234
00:09:49,116 --> 00:09:51,282
What kind of movies are we
watching for our sleepover?
235
00:09:51,357 --> 00:09:52,396
Are they shameless?
236
00:09:52,421 --> 00:09:57,611
Uh, I have pretty much every
Renée Zellweger romantic comedy
237
00:09:57,663 --> 00:09:59,060
from 1996...
238
00:09:59,085 --> 00:10:01,331
- Yes!
- To 2004.
239
00:10:01,367 --> 00:10:03,333
Oh, I so miss her old face.
240
00:10:03,369 --> 00:10:05,836
Oh, my God, she was so good.
God, what a tragic thing.
241
00:10:05,871 --> 00:10:07,802
Um, Phoebe, can I talk to you?
242
00:10:07,827 --> 00:10:10,138
- Um, yeah.
- Hey.
243
00:10:13,091 --> 00:10:14,595
- Hey.
- Hey.
244
00:10:14,630 --> 00:10:15,963
What's up?
245
00:10:16,015 --> 00:10:17,848
Landlord's being a jerk.
246
00:10:17,883 --> 00:10:19,933
I tried to explain to him that
I wanted out of my lease early,
247
00:10:19,969 --> 00:10:21,301
and he kicked me out today.
248
00:10:21,303 --> 00:10:23,187
- Oh, my God, what an ass-head.
- I know.
249
00:10:23,222 --> 00:10:25,216
I know that it's bad
timing, with the wedding.
250
00:10:25,727 --> 00:10:27,618
- You know, I can always go...
- No, no.
251
00:10:27,643 --> 00:10:29,325
You are... you are staying here.
252
00:10:30,062 --> 00:10:31,481
Okay, what about...
253
00:10:33,373 --> 00:10:35,427
- Let me handle that.
- Okay.
254
00:10:38,718 --> 00:10:41,335
So...
255
00:10:41,360 --> 00:10:43,888
JD needs a place to crash for a bit,
256
00:10:44,043 --> 00:10:45,492
so he's gonna be here tonight,
257
00:10:45,544 --> 00:10:47,591
but I promise you he
will not be in our way.
258
00:10:47,640 --> 00:10:48,794
Wow.
259
00:10:49,358 --> 00:10:52,476
I thought you guys were
done. Now he's moving in.
260
00:10:52,697 --> 00:10:55,030
Yes, it is a story...
261
00:10:56,496 --> 00:10:57,962
For another time.
262
00:10:57,987 --> 00:10:59,237
Today's about vous.
263
00:10:59,262 --> 00:11:00,961
- I'm gonna go for a run.
- Okay, you go.
264
00:11:00,986 --> 00:11:02,369
Get that run on.
265
00:11:02,560 --> 00:11:04,810
_
266
00:11:14,860 --> 00:11:17,027
Katherine, hey.
267
00:11:17,052 --> 00:11:18,885
How's my favorite writer?
268
00:11:19,028 --> 00:11:20,778
- You almost done?
- So close.
269
00:11:20,803 --> 00:11:22,085
Just a few last-minute edits,
270
00:11:22,110 --> 00:11:24,361
and then I'm gonna send
it to you right away.
271
00:11:24,700 --> 00:11:25,999
Good God, where are you?
272
00:11:26,035 --> 00:11:27,784
- Okay.
- What are you doing?
273
00:11:27,836 --> 00:11:29,849
Buying a penis cup, jock strap.
274
00:11:29,874 --> 00:11:31,114
Uh...
275
00:11:31,908 --> 00:11:33,521
I have to call you back.
276
00:11:39,193 --> 00:11:40,526
When can we meet Dr. Harris?
277
00:11:40,551 --> 00:11:42,134
Very soon, ladies. Very soon.
278
00:11:42,296 --> 00:11:44,372
How did he finish his book so fast?
279
00:11:45,429 --> 00:11:46,692
Do you know him?
280
00:11:48,202 --> 00:11:49,146
No.
281
00:11:49,727 --> 00:11:53,661
No, he's just always, you
know, in some random country...
282
00:11:54,397 --> 00:11:55,896
screwing some random woman.
283
00:11:55,921 --> 00:11:58,121
I'm just wondering how he
finished his book that quickly.
284
00:11:58,325 --> 00:12:01,083
Oh, my God. I know you. Are you...
285
00:12:01,230 --> 00:12:02,896
You were his girlfriend.
286
00:12:03,527 --> 00:12:05,861
Uh, no. That is somebody else.
287
00:12:08,460 --> 00:12:09,543
Okay, bye.
288
00:12:09,585 --> 00:12:10,669
Aaah! Whoa!
289
00:12:10,694 --> 00:12:12,744
- I got you.
- Ow! Ow.
290
00:12:12,949 --> 00:12:15,442
I just Google-imaged them. It is her.
291
00:12:15,467 --> 00:12:18,841
It's totally Dr. Harris's ex...
The older one, Abby McCarthy!
292
00:12:18,866 --> 00:12:20,911
Get in there, and I'll
get your picture with her.
293
00:12:20,936 --> 00:12:22,102
Oh, my gosh.
294
00:12:22,127 --> 00:12:24,127
I know I had it 'cause I put it in here.
295
00:12:24,152 --> 00:12:26,319
Can't find your ticket, it's 24 bucks.
296
00:12:26,366 --> 00:12:27,396
What's the holdup?
297
00:12:27,421 --> 00:12:30,099
- You're holding up the line.
- I-I-I hear you.
298
00:12:30,124 --> 00:12:32,106
I'm just trying to find this.
299
00:12:32,135 --> 00:12:34,101
So is this gonna be cash or credit?
300
00:12:34,270 --> 00:12:35,936
Seriously? This is what
the world has come to now?
301
00:12:35,988 --> 00:12:37,263
You make one mistake,
302
00:12:37,288 --> 00:12:38,935
and suddenly you're a terrible
person who needs to be punished.
303
00:12:38,960 --> 00:12:41,252
- All right.
- Lady, let's go!
304
00:12:41,277 --> 00:12:42,942
Can I please just get one pass, one pass?
305
00:12:42,967 --> 00:12:44,606
I don't even want to be here. I have work.
306
00:12:44,631 --> 00:12:46,965
So is this gonna be cash or credit?
307
00:12:49,747 --> 00:12:53,287
I will no longer be punished!
308
00:12:53,339 --> 00:12:55,122
Anymore!
309
00:12:55,174 --> 00:12:56,873
You can... you can take your trolley,
310
00:12:56,925 --> 00:12:58,842
and you can take your ticket,
311
00:12:58,877 --> 00:13:03,430
and you can shove it up your ass!
312
00:13:03,465 --> 00:13:05,682
Hey! Hey! Oh!
313
00:13:11,614 --> 00:13:13,052
- Hey.
- Hmm?
314
00:13:13,085 --> 00:13:15,544
Is Delia still on the phone
with the wedding planner?
315
00:13:16,225 --> 00:13:17,341
- Yeah.
- Yeah?
316
00:13:17,366 --> 00:13:19,047
- Why?
- Okay.
317
00:13:19,049 --> 00:13:21,864
I'm... I'm worried about Abby.
318
00:13:22,107 --> 00:13:23,773
She's supposed to be
taking care of herself,
319
00:13:23,798 --> 00:13:25,881
but Barbara said she saw
her, and she looks like hell,
320
00:13:25,906 --> 00:13:27,839
and she's not responding to my calls,
321
00:13:27,864 --> 00:13:29,780
and I think that maybe you should try.
322
00:13:30,144 --> 00:13:31,606
Do you know who you're talking to?
323
00:13:31,631 --> 00:13:33,597
She's been screening
my calls since the '90s.
324
00:13:33,644 --> 00:13:35,227
She was just so awful to Delia.
325
00:13:35,366 --> 00:13:36,532
- Awful.
- The worst.
326
00:13:36,567 --> 00:13:38,239
This is not Abby. What
is going on with her?
327
00:13:38,345 --> 00:13:39,785
I was afraid this was gonna happen.
328
00:13:39,810 --> 00:13:41,286
- I've seen this before.
- What?
329
00:13:41,311 --> 00:13:43,200
She gets self-destructive.
She pushes people away.
330
00:13:43,240 --> 00:13:44,940
She's bullheaded. You know that about her.
331
00:13:44,942 --> 00:13:47,503
And I already picked Frumpkis
off the floor earlier today.
332
00:13:47,528 --> 00:13:48,341
Mm-hmm.
333
00:13:48,366 --> 00:13:49,622
My back hurts.
334
00:13:50,172 --> 00:13:51,177
Mm-hmm.
335
00:13:51,870 --> 00:13:54,120
Okay, okay. If we don't
hear from her tomorrow...
336
00:13:54,122 --> 00:13:55,121
Okay.
337
00:13:55,123 --> 00:13:56,506
Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.
338
00:13:58,126 --> 00:14:00,042
- We're gonna party!
- Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay.
339
00:14:00,095 --> 00:14:01,844
Before dick games and
bad romantic comedies,
340
00:14:01,880 --> 00:14:03,575
I just have one...
341
00:14:03,798 --> 00:14:04,797
request.
342
00:14:04,799 --> 00:14:07,350
- Uh-oh.
- Huh? Bam.
343
00:14:07,385 --> 00:14:09,635
Whoo-hoo!
344
00:14:13,538 --> 00:14:15,839
- Whoo!
- Yeah!
345
00:14:18,439 --> 00:14:20,656
_
346
00:14:20,681 --> 00:14:22,931
_
347
00:14:24,225 --> 00:14:26,129
Whoo!
348
00:14:31,576 --> 00:14:32,792
_
349
00:14:36,581 --> 00:14:39,081
Yeah!
350
00:14:42,003 --> 00:14:43,586
Frumpkis, he's, like...
351
00:14:43,611 --> 00:14:46,278
His drama's this vacuum that sucks you in.
352
00:14:46,341 --> 00:14:47,974
How was I married to him for so long?
353
00:14:48,009 --> 00:14:49,392
I think what you did was very brave.
354
00:14:49,427 --> 00:14:50,731
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
355
00:14:50,756 --> 00:14:52,890
Most women would've hung
their douche-bag ex out to dry.
356
00:14:53,200 --> 00:14:55,417
Zooey is very lucky to have you.
357
00:14:55,442 --> 00:14:57,575
Thanks for letting her stay over, honey.
358
00:14:57,600 --> 00:14:59,200
I couldn't have her at his place tonight.
359
00:14:59,225 --> 00:15:01,843
I've got to keep her out of
his mess as long as I can.
360
00:15:01,990 --> 00:15:03,773
You know, you cannot
keep doing this forever.
361
00:15:03,825 --> 00:15:05,158
- Mm.
- You do realize that, right?
362
00:15:05,193 --> 00:15:07,193
I can if I can get him
to clean the hell up.
363
00:15:07,195 --> 00:15:09,078
Like that ever worked
for you in the past...
364
00:15:09,113 --> 00:15:10,196
Waiting for him to clean up.
365
00:15:10,198 --> 00:15:11,497
Got to be a first, right?
366
00:15:12,534 --> 00:15:14,584
Oh, God, sorry. Uh, no peeking.
367
00:15:14,619 --> 00:15:16,841
I, uh... I left my phone.
368
00:15:17,163 --> 00:15:18,296
Uh...
369
00:15:18,456 --> 00:15:19,422
found it!
370
00:15:19,457 --> 00:15:20,942
Okay, bye! Sorry!
371
00:15:22,544 --> 00:15:24,200
What was Rain Man going on about?
372
00:15:24,225 --> 00:15:26,059
- Hey.
- I think he's living here now.
373
00:15:26,084 --> 00:15:27,300
What? Why?
374
00:15:27,325 --> 00:15:29,208
- Mm-mm.
- I thought you were done.
375
00:15:29,233 --> 00:15:30,649
Because I like him a lot.
376
00:15:30,852 --> 00:15:32,385
Oh, Phoebes, come on.
377
00:15:32,387 --> 00:15:34,220
He's got the social skills
of a coco banana slug.
378
00:15:34,222 --> 00:15:35,388
You seriously need to stop it.
379
00:15:35,763 --> 00:15:36,979
I-I like him.
380
00:15:37,162 --> 00:15:38,461
I actually more than like him,
381
00:15:38,486 --> 00:15:39,785
so I need you to cut him some slack.
382
00:15:39,810 --> 00:15:41,527
Phoebes, take a beat.
383
00:15:41,552 --> 00:15:44,520
You took his virginity, like, a minute ago.
384
00:15:44,545 --> 00:15:46,876
Clearly your vagina's
made of leprechaun gold,
385
00:15:46,901 --> 00:15:48,367
because the boy is sprung.
386
00:15:48,403 --> 00:15:50,069
Well, maybe you like having the upper hand
387
00:15:50,071 --> 00:15:51,427
because all the guys
you've been dating lately...
388
00:15:51,452 --> 00:15:53,085
Are assholes. I know.
389
00:15:53,199 --> 00:15:55,950
This is not a reaction,
and I don't feel obligated.
390
00:15:55,975 --> 00:15:59,059
This is the first time someone
has actually made me feel smart
391
00:15:59,084 --> 00:16:00,950
and funny and needed,
392
00:16:00,975 --> 00:16:03,142
and I know JD and I have not
been together for a long time,
393
00:16:03,167 --> 00:16:06,502
but... I feel closer to
him than I've ever felt
394
00:16:06,527 --> 00:16:07,856
to any man.
395
00:16:08,764 --> 00:16:11,348
So back off, both of you,
396
00:16:11,475 --> 00:16:13,525
because he's not going anywhere.
397
00:16:13,550 --> 00:16:15,550
The claws come out. I like it.
398
00:16:15,575 --> 00:16:17,658
You should suck on candy dicks more often.
399
00:16:17,683 --> 00:16:19,933
Look, if you like him
and he makes you happy,
400
00:16:19,958 --> 00:16:21,207
then we love him.
401
00:16:21,232 --> 00:16:22,732
Absolutely.
402
00:16:32,975 --> 00:16:34,424
Oh, my God, it's Abby.
403
00:16:34,449 --> 00:16:35,748
Oh, my God.
404
00:16:35,783 --> 00:16:36,999
Finally. I knew she would.
405
00:16:37,035 --> 00:16:38,751
I know. I knew she would too.
406
00:16:38,786 --> 00:16:39,952
Of course.
407
00:16:39,954 --> 00:16:41,871
Okay. "I'm sorry.
408
00:16:41,923 --> 00:16:43,589
I wish you lots of happiness. I really do."
409
00:16:43,625 --> 00:16:44,590
Aww.
410
00:16:44,626 --> 00:16:45,708
She's still writing.
411
00:16:58,439 --> 00:16:59,669
That's it?
412
00:17:00,275 --> 00:17:01,349
Really?
413
00:17:01,726 --> 00:17:02,810
Really?
414
00:17:02,857 --> 00:17:04,690
D, she kind of said she was sorry.
415
00:17:04,715 --> 00:17:07,332
All those things that she said
at the bachelorette party...
416
00:17:07,357 --> 00:17:08,306
Very insensitive.
417
00:17:08,331 --> 00:17:10,114
Yeah, well, did she mean them?
418
00:17:10,334 --> 00:17:12,785
Because two people that
I'm close to this week
419
00:17:12,810 --> 00:17:14,009
said the same thing to me...
420
00:17:14,155 --> 00:17:15,231
"Don't marry Gordon."
421
00:17:15,256 --> 00:17:17,389
Hey, D, Albert is obsessed with you.
422
00:17:17,414 --> 00:17:18,830
And Abby's not herself right now.
423
00:17:19,127 --> 00:17:20,993
I'm getting married tomorrow,
424
00:17:20,995 --> 00:17:23,364
and all I can hear is them in my head.
425
00:17:23,389 --> 00:17:24,771
Their doubt.
426
00:17:24,817 --> 00:17:25,949
Hey, the way you look at him...
427
00:17:25,974 --> 00:17:27,441
- Mm-hmm.
- Mm.
428
00:17:27,466 --> 00:17:29,479
You two are so... in love.
429
00:17:29,504 --> 00:17:30,591
Yeah.
430
00:17:30,616 --> 00:17:31,653
Trust that.
431
00:17:32,486 --> 00:17:35,120
It'd be disgusting if I
didn't like you so much.
432
00:17:39,564 --> 00:17:41,677
Okay, enough romantic comedies.
433
00:17:42,989 --> 00:17:45,184
I need to get my "Mr. Robot" on.
434
00:17:45,186 --> 00:17:47,019
- Oh, God, yes.
- Ooh.
435
00:17:47,021 --> 00:17:48,688
Let's do it. Come on.
436
00:17:57,699 --> 00:18:00,082
Uh...
437
00:18:00,187 --> 00:18:02,246
God.
438
00:18:04,599 --> 00:18:06,539
This is done. I got this.
439
00:18:06,591 --> 00:18:08,007
Oh, hello, Kat.
440
00:18:08,042 --> 00:18:10,310
- Say hello to my big book.
- _
441
00:18:12,714 --> 00:18:15,548
"Send." Oh.
442
00:18:17,885 --> 00:18:18,981
Done.
443
00:18:44,304 --> 00:18:48,817
What is happening?
444
00:18:50,740 --> 00:18:53,394
Well, for one thing,
445
00:18:53,419 --> 00:18:55,553
this blanket hog has a
really big day ahead of her.
446
00:18:55,588 --> 00:18:57,555
Delia!
447
00:18:57,590 --> 00:18:59,090
The blanket hog needs another hour.
448
00:18:59,142 --> 00:19:02,176
No, rise and shine. It is 7:30.
449
00:19:06,399 --> 00:19:07,648
Oh, God.
450
00:19:26,919 --> 00:19:28,619
Why do I have so many work emails?
451
00:19:28,671 --> 00:19:30,325
Doesn't everybody know
I'm getting married today?
452
00:19:30,350 --> 00:19:31,599
Do you?
453
00:19:31,624 --> 00:19:33,490
- What?
- Where's the excitement?
454
00:19:33,646 --> 00:19:36,013
Yeah, I know we're not
ritually cleansing you, but...
455
00:19:36,065 --> 00:19:38,433
The next time you see Gordon,
you're gonna be married to him.
456
00:19:38,485 --> 00:19:40,485
That's crazy. Honestly, that's crazy.
457
00:19:40,520 --> 00:19:43,404
Okay, we need a game plan.
Who's showering in what order?
458
00:19:43,440 --> 00:19:46,591
I'm gonna take one at my
place when I drop Zooey off,
459
00:19:46,626 --> 00:19:50,161
but first I've got... I've
got to run over to Rize Bakery
460
00:19:50,196 --> 00:19:51,829
and just check on the wedding orders
461
00:19:51,865 --> 00:19:53,414
and make sure that they're good to do.
462
00:19:53,450 --> 00:19:55,283
Um, all right, well, the
glam squad's gonna meet us
463
00:19:55,335 --> 00:19:56,367
at the mansion in a little bit.
464
00:19:56,419 --> 00:19:58,669
- Delia, your massage...
- Skip it.
465
00:19:58,705 --> 00:20:00,121
- No time.
- Why?
466
00:20:00,173 --> 00:20:02,053
I forgot. I have a quick
errand I need to run.
467
00:20:02,091 --> 00:20:04,425
- You need your massage.
- It's important.
468
00:20:04,461 --> 00:20:06,677
I'll meet you guys there.
469
00:20:06,713 --> 00:20:08,846
- Okay.
- Sorry. Top-secret bride stuff.
470
00:20:08,882 --> 00:20:10,097
All right, sweetie.
471
00:20:10,841 --> 00:20:11,799
See you!
472
00:20:17,997 --> 00:20:19,774
Working?
473
00:20:19,809 --> 00:20:21,325
On your very own wedding day?
474
00:20:22,935 --> 00:20:24,228
What are you doing here?
475
00:20:24,280 --> 00:20:27,315
Reminding you to take a break
and enjoy this momentous day.
476
00:20:27,367 --> 00:20:29,817
Delia, isn't it, like,
bad luck or something?
477
00:20:29,869 --> 00:20:31,035
No, no, no.
478
00:20:31,070 --> 00:20:33,091
Only if you see me in my wedding dress.
479
00:20:37,772 --> 00:20:39,071
Anyway...
480
00:20:39,096 --> 00:20:42,739
do you really want to
send emails all morning?
481
00:20:43,638 --> 00:20:45,466
I mean, I know that... That
you're not superstitious
482
00:20:45,502 --> 00:20:46,467
or anything...
483
00:20:46,503 --> 00:20:48,336
This is the happiest day of my life.
484
00:20:48,388 --> 00:20:49,504
I wanted to see you.
485
00:20:55,094 --> 00:20:57,856
I don't understand how you're
so calm about this, frankly.
486
00:20:57,881 --> 00:20:59,491
Oh, everything's fine, Zooey.
487
00:20:59,516 --> 00:21:01,265
You just got to let
your mom take care of...
488
00:21:01,317 --> 00:21:04,005
How are you gonna take care
of Charlene leaving Dad?
489
00:21:05,534 --> 00:21:08,034
What? Why do you think that...
490
00:21:08,059 --> 00:21:10,152
Because he's been drinking
and forgetting stuff
491
00:21:10,177 --> 00:21:11,497
and disappearing.
492
00:21:11,726 --> 00:21:14,606
And, oh, yeah, Charlene's gone,
and so is my tennis instructor.
493
00:21:15,208 --> 00:21:16,872
Everyone at the club knows.
494
00:21:18,034 --> 00:21:19,500
Well, that makes sense.
495
00:21:19,536 --> 00:21:21,146
I'm worried he's gonna hurt himself.
496
00:21:21,588 --> 00:21:23,685
You know what happens if he
doesn't have someone to...
497
00:21:23,710 --> 00:21:25,031
Suck the essence out of?
498
00:21:27,044 --> 00:21:28,603
Look, I love your abnormally large heart,
499
00:21:28,628 --> 00:21:31,128
but... I've been through this many times.
500
00:21:31,130 --> 00:21:32,192
Your dad...
501
00:21:33,422 --> 00:21:35,088
it's like the "Circle of Life"
502
00:21:35,187 --> 00:21:36,720
with barbiturates instead of lions.
503
00:21:36,936 --> 00:21:38,386
Why are you making jokes about this?
504
00:21:38,438 --> 00:21:39,887
I'm not finding any of this funny.
505
00:21:39,939 --> 00:21:41,114
Okay, listen, listen,
506
00:21:41,139 --> 00:21:43,316
I am not gonna let him fall apart, okay?
507
00:21:43,341 --> 00:21:44,200
How?
508
00:21:44,225 --> 00:21:46,277
If we abandon him, then
he's just gonna keep...
509
00:21:46,312 --> 00:21:48,692
He's gonna get help this
time. I will make sure of it.
510
00:21:48,717 --> 00:21:51,528
I promise you no one is
abandoning your father...
511
00:21:53,294 --> 00:21:55,797
even though he makes it so tempting.
512
00:21:56,271 --> 00:21:57,872
- You mean it?
- Yes.
513
00:21:57,907 --> 00:22:00,388
He can even stay with us for a
while if that's what it takes.
514
00:22:00,800 --> 00:22:03,267
But listen, kid, you've
got to stop worrying.
515
00:22:03,292 --> 00:22:04,650
That's my job.
516
00:22:06,132 --> 00:22:07,081
Okay.
517
00:22:07,133 --> 00:22:08,192
- Okay?
- Thank you.
518
00:22:09,310 --> 00:22:11,836
Now go help Scott load everything up.
519
00:22:11,838 --> 00:22:13,137
Okay.
520
00:22:15,925 --> 00:22:18,175
Hey. Are those ready for the van?
521
00:22:18,177 --> 00:22:19,343
- I got them. Thanks.
- No, I'll take them.
522
00:22:19,345 --> 00:22:20,678
- It's cool.
- Okay.
523
00:22:20,680 --> 00:22:22,013
Thanks, Zooey.
524
00:22:22,015 --> 00:22:23,514
Everything's in order?
525
00:22:23,516 --> 00:22:24,646
Yeah.
526
00:22:24,901 --> 00:22:26,684
- You all right?
- Oh, yeah.
527
00:22:26,686 --> 00:22:28,019
Couldn't be better.
528
00:22:28,021 --> 00:22:29,236
Can I give the two of you a lift?
529
00:22:29,272 --> 00:22:30,571
Oh, no. No, no, no.
530
00:22:30,607 --> 00:22:31,906
Thank, but, no, thanks.
531
00:22:31,941 --> 00:22:34,208
The wonders of modern
technology called Uber.
532
00:22:34,966 --> 00:22:36,671
I guess I'll see you at the ceremony, then.
533
00:22:36,696 --> 00:22:37,945
See you.
534
00:22:48,341 --> 00:22:49,707
- Still no answer?
- Nope.
535
00:22:49,759 --> 00:22:51,342
- Nothing?
- No.
536
00:22:51,377 --> 00:22:54,128
I come bearing extra calories.
537
00:22:54,180 --> 00:22:55,546
Babs.
538
00:22:55,598 --> 00:22:56,881
Everything okay?
539
00:22:56,883 --> 00:22:58,549
Bride still on her mystery errand?
540
00:22:58,601 --> 00:22:59,567
Yep.
541
00:23:00,053 --> 00:23:02,053
But Abby... bad news.
542
00:23:02,055 --> 00:23:04,722
You got a hold of her?
What the hell's going on?
543
00:23:04,724 --> 00:23:06,216
No, we didn't get a hold of her.
544
00:23:07,360 --> 00:23:08,726
Show her.
545
00:23:08,728 --> 00:23:11,786
So yesterday the "Habby" hashtag lit up.
546
00:23:11,811 --> 00:23:13,731
- Oh.
- Here's why.
547
00:23:14,341 --> 00:23:16,150
Oh, this doesn't look good.
548
00:23:16,419 --> 00:23:17,985
Oh, my God, is she at The Grove?
549
00:23:18,037 --> 00:23:19,236
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
550
00:23:19,288 --> 00:23:20,763
She's in really big trouble, isn't she?
551
00:23:21,908 --> 00:23:23,324
"Dr. Harris dumped the train wreck.
552
00:23:23,376 --> 00:23:24,875
Never understood the appeal."
553
00:23:24,911 --> 00:23:27,128
"Damaged goods didn't seem like his type."
554
00:23:28,414 --> 00:23:30,081
Breakups are bad enough
without 1,000 people
555
00:23:30,083 --> 00:23:32,083
screaming that you're
a... "Dumpster whore."
556
00:23:32,135 --> 00:23:34,719
- This shit is rough.
- Dumpster whore?
557
00:23:34,754 --> 00:23:36,354
Yeah, if I'm Abby, I'm staying far away
558
00:23:36,389 --> 00:23:37,722
from technology right now.
559
00:23:37,757 --> 00:23:39,997
Or digging a hole to quietly die in.
560
00:23:40,560 --> 00:23:42,942
- Yeah.
- Okay, I am officially worried.
561
00:23:43,973 --> 00:23:44,997
Guys...
562
00:23:45,624 --> 00:23:47,286
she lives, like, ten minutes from here.
563
00:23:47,984 --> 00:23:49,350
Why don't we just go over there?
564
00:23:49,402 --> 00:23:50,351
- Let's go.
- Let's go.
565
00:23:50,403 --> 00:23:51,575
Yeah, let's go.
566
00:23:51,807 --> 00:23:54,481
I'm sorry. Don't we have
a wedding to get ready for?
567
00:23:55,108 --> 00:23:56,774
We have a wedding to save.
568
00:23:56,826 --> 00:23:59,026
Okay, I don't know how many
goddamn Kate Hudson movies
569
00:23:59,078 --> 00:24:00,161
you watched last night,
570
00:24:00,196 --> 00:24:02,279
but folks don't actually run around
571
00:24:02,331 --> 00:24:05,616
saving weddings and magically
getting people back together.
572
00:24:05,618 --> 00:24:07,380
Not with that attitude, they don't.
573
00:24:08,751 --> 00:24:09,931
- Vamos.
- Come on.
574
00:24:12,458 --> 00:24:15,259
Well, that was probably for the best.
575
00:24:16,652 --> 00:24:17,575
Probably.
576
00:24:18,700 --> 00:24:20,598
At any point of the
day, if you get stressed,
577
00:24:20,633 --> 00:24:24,218
at least you can say,
"I had amazing sex with"...
578
00:24:24,270 --> 00:24:26,270
My wife.
579
00:24:26,515 --> 00:24:28,965
'Cause you'll be my wife by then.
580
00:24:31,144 --> 00:24:32,910
How's it feel?
581
00:24:32,945 --> 00:24:34,685
Like, finally.
582
00:24:37,267 --> 00:24:40,067
Tomorrow we can just wake up and...
583
00:24:40,379 --> 00:24:41,903
have our lives together.
584
00:24:43,156 --> 00:24:45,956
I know that some part
of you has always dreamed
585
00:24:45,992 --> 00:24:47,278
about this day.
586
00:24:49,719 --> 00:24:51,207
I mean, you are still a woman.
587
00:24:53,199 --> 00:24:54,498
Uh, shouldn't you go?
588
00:24:54,550 --> 00:24:57,752
Aren't you gonna be
late, uh, for our wedding?
589
00:24:59,722 --> 00:25:01,088
- I'll see you on the aisle.
- Okay.
590
00:25:22,768 --> 00:25:24,185
You feeling nimble?
591
00:25:24,327 --> 00:25:25,146
Huh?
592
00:25:26,249 --> 00:25:27,915
Get out of here. That's a tiny window.
593
00:25:27,950 --> 00:25:29,083
You're a tiny person.
594
00:25:29,118 --> 00:25:30,201
I'm a biter too.
595
00:25:31,954 --> 00:25:34,088
The door is locked, and she's
still not answering her phone.
596
00:25:35,163 --> 00:25:37,146
- What?
- We've got a lead.
597
00:25:37,627 --> 00:25:39,093
No, I am not missing Delia's wedding
598
00:25:39,128 --> 00:25:40,795
because I got arrested
for breaking and entering.
599
00:25:40,847 --> 00:25:42,263
And I'm not missing Delia's wedding
600
00:25:42,298 --> 00:25:44,021
because Abby got dumped and
downed a bottle of pills.
601
00:25:45,051 --> 00:25:47,099
It's not usually how she handles
things. Just saying.
602
00:25:47,926 --> 00:25:50,414
I'm gonna keep calling.
603
00:25:53,109 --> 00:25:55,109
Sometimes you got to be a hero.
604
00:25:56,395 --> 00:25:58,279
Oh, my God.
605
00:26:38,813 --> 00:26:40,414
Oh, naked!
606
00:26:42,594 --> 00:26:44,859
So you have a major book deadline.
607
00:26:44,982 --> 00:26:48,923
Yes, but in that there is victory.
608
00:26:48,948 --> 00:26:49,947
I sent it in.
609
00:26:49,949 --> 00:26:51,448
- Yeah.
- That's great.
610
00:26:51,500 --> 00:26:52,783
- Yeah.
- Really?
611
00:26:52,785 --> 00:26:54,201
I just had all these plates up in the air,
612
00:26:54,253 --> 00:26:55,619
and then I was like, "You know what?
613
00:26:55,671 --> 00:26:56,921
"The book's in good shape,
614
00:26:56,956 --> 00:26:58,956
and this is an impossible
amount of plates, so done."
615
00:26:58,958 --> 00:27:01,041
- That's the spirit, baby.
- Yeah.
616
00:27:01,093 --> 00:27:03,878
I just can't keep worrying about
every little thing, you know?
617
00:27:03,930 --> 00:27:05,445
I'm gonna give myself a heart attack.
618
00:27:09,555 --> 00:27:11,484
Honestly, I feel like
619
00:27:11,637 --> 00:27:14,117
I am cracking up a little bit...
620
00:27:14,545 --> 00:27:15,911
like the survey says.
621
00:27:16,275 --> 00:27:18,225
Abby, I think you're a
little hard on yourself.
622
00:27:18,617 --> 00:27:20,978
And you're always asking... for more
623
00:27:20,980 --> 00:27:23,063
when you should be asking for help.
624
00:27:23,380 --> 00:27:26,500
And that is a very
unhelpful defense mechanism.
625
00:27:28,527 --> 00:27:31,728
And I think you... are
especially hard on yourself
626
00:27:31,824 --> 00:27:34,541
when you think something is your fault.
627
00:27:36,295 --> 00:27:37,500
Oh. Uh-huh.
628
00:27:38,529 --> 00:27:39,645
No.
629
00:27:40,049 --> 00:27:42,333
No. No, no, no Delia talk right now.
630
00:27:42,385 --> 00:27:43,918
This is not a good time.
631
00:27:43,970 --> 00:27:45,336
Abby, I know you're
probably blaming yourself.
632
00:27:45,388 --> 00:27:46,837
Well, it's my fault.
633
00:27:46,889 --> 00:27:49,172
I just don't have the bandwidth
to deal with it at the moment.
634
00:27:49,542 --> 00:27:51,626
Will you tomorrow, when
you wake up and you realize
635
00:27:51,651 --> 00:27:53,023
that you skipped out on
your friend's wedding?
636
00:27:53,048 --> 00:27:56,324
I didn't skip out. I was uninvited.
637
00:27:56,349 --> 00:27:59,203
Mm. That sounds like an excuse to me.
638
00:28:09,495 --> 00:28:11,195
Okay, uh, this has been
639
00:28:11,247 --> 00:28:14,836
a very productive rescue mission.
640
00:28:14,861 --> 00:28:16,894
Clearly I'm not dead, so...
641
00:28:16,919 --> 00:28:18,953
Great. Just skip it. Skip the wedding.
642
00:28:19,005 --> 00:28:20,921
I mean, this will all blow
over, and in a few years,
643
00:28:20,957 --> 00:28:22,414
you'll probably forget
there was ever a fight.
644
00:28:24,010 --> 00:28:25,459
But I know you,
645
00:28:25,511 --> 00:28:27,962
and you will always regret
646
00:28:28,014 --> 00:28:30,109
not being there for a friend.
647
00:28:38,318 --> 00:28:40,318
Hurry up, you're already committed.
648
00:28:48,180 --> 00:28:49,963
Oh, my God.
649
00:28:49,988 --> 00:28:51,094
And you guys thought
I wasn't gonna make it.
650
00:28:51,119 --> 00:28:52,203
Where have you been?
651
00:28:52,228 --> 00:28:57,016
Well, we had our own
wedding-related errands to run.
652
00:29:00,476 --> 00:29:01,977
Hi, Delia.
653
00:29:05,555 --> 00:29:06,625
Hi, Abby.
654
00:29:09,239 --> 00:29:10,891
It's time to get dressed.
655
00:29:14,698 --> 00:29:17,615
Okay, well, I have a wedding
dress to put on, so...
656
00:29:22,372 --> 00:29:25,740
Well, that was chilly,
but it could've been worse.
657
00:29:25,792 --> 00:29:27,430
Are my nipples showing?
658
00:29:29,109 --> 00:29:31,246
Um, I'm gonna go get dressed too.
659
00:29:31,248 --> 00:29:32,492
Okay.
660
00:29:33,049 --> 00:29:34,299
Hi.
661
00:29:34,594 --> 00:29:35,810
Whoa!
662
00:29:35,838 --> 00:29:37,755
Boners for Algernon.
663
00:29:37,807 --> 00:29:39,640
JD.
664
00:29:39,675 --> 00:29:41,070
Am I wearing it right?
665
00:29:41,095 --> 00:29:44,586
Um, you are wearing it exactly right.
666
00:29:45,374 --> 00:29:46,957
How you doing, babe?
667
00:29:47,001 --> 00:29:49,835
I'm very excellent, actually.
668
00:29:50,019 --> 00:29:51,602
I really like painting at your house.
669
00:29:51,664 --> 00:29:54,488
You get... very good light, like you.
670
00:29:54,524 --> 00:29:56,824
Oh.
671
00:29:56,859 --> 00:29:58,555
I'm sorry. Who is that?
672
00:29:59,028 --> 00:30:00,297
Phoebe's new dude.
673
00:30:02,258 --> 00:30:04,446
How's my blushing?
674
00:30:08,421 --> 00:30:10,588
Aww.
675
00:30:10,623 --> 00:30:12,206
Oh, my God.
676
00:30:12,208 --> 00:30:13,541
I'd marry you.
677
00:30:13,543 --> 00:30:16,303
Okay. Let's get this show on the road.
678
00:30:22,385 --> 00:30:23,968
- Hi.
- Hello. Right there.
679
00:30:24,020 --> 00:30:25,686
Thank you.
680
00:30:32,562 --> 00:30:33,978
Don't worry. I found the bar.
681
00:30:34,030 --> 00:30:35,863
The bridal party is
assembling for the portraits.
682
00:30:35,898 --> 00:30:38,449
Mm. Well, shit, I'll go join them.
683
00:30:49,912 --> 00:30:51,629
Hey.
684
00:30:51,664 --> 00:30:53,344
You guys talk yet?
685
00:30:56,752 --> 00:30:58,302
Jesus Christ, you two.
686
00:30:58,337 --> 00:31:01,722
Would you rather take
care of this at the altar?
687
00:31:06,753 --> 00:31:08,887
Delia...
688
00:31:12,504 --> 00:31:14,242
I feel like an idiot.
689
00:31:14,520 --> 00:31:18,105
I feel like a mean idiot,
and I don't want to be mean,
690
00:31:18,107 --> 00:31:19,657
much less to you, my friend,
691
00:31:19,692 --> 00:31:22,776
who I-I adore and who is right.
692
00:31:22,778 --> 00:31:24,047
I-I...
693
00:31:24,165 --> 00:31:26,945
I freaked out on you
because of my own shit.
694
00:31:28,118 --> 00:31:33,022
And that is horrible on more
levels than I can probably count
695
00:31:33,063 --> 00:31:34,820
or... comprehend.
696
00:31:38,878 --> 00:31:42,012
I just want you to be happy. I really do.
697
00:31:42,048 --> 00:31:44,508
I really do, and what I said...
698
00:31:45,301 --> 00:31:47,134
it came out wrong.
699
00:31:47,136 --> 00:31:49,688
It just... but it came
out of love, you know...
700
00:31:50,890 --> 00:31:53,357
just a very, very, very dumb kind of love
701
00:31:53,392 --> 00:31:55,891
and extremely poorly timed, apparently.
702
00:31:56,670 --> 00:31:58,320
I'm so sorry.
703
00:32:00,047 --> 00:32:02,116
Delia, I am so sorry.
704
00:32:05,571 --> 00:32:07,538
If you're finished with
your portraits, ladies,
705
00:32:07,573 --> 00:32:08,989
it's time to leave for the church.
706
00:32:09,041 --> 00:32:10,824
I'm gonna grab another drink.
707
00:32:10,826 --> 00:32:12,320
Great. I'm going to...
708
00:32:12,989 --> 00:32:14,038
join you.
709
00:32:24,840 --> 00:32:26,140
Okay.
710
00:32:32,565 --> 00:32:34,014
- Hi.
- Hi.
711
00:32:34,016 --> 00:32:36,016
Can I get one of those
pre-reception cocktails, please?
712
00:32:36,068 --> 00:32:37,351
- Quick.
- You got it.
713
00:32:37,353 --> 00:32:38,485
Thank you.
714
00:32:40,523 --> 00:32:42,516
Knocking them back, eh?
715
00:32:43,025 --> 00:32:44,775
You're not even the one getting married.
716
00:32:44,827 --> 00:32:46,410
God, stop worrying about me.
717
00:32:46,445 --> 00:32:48,996
Why can't I, huh? I don't mind.
718
00:32:49,031 --> 00:32:51,115
Because I'm your boss. Remember?
719
00:32:51,167 --> 00:32:52,533
Back when things were normal.
720
00:32:52,585 --> 00:32:54,585
I don't want to go back to normal.
721
00:32:54,620 --> 00:32:56,281
Ay, Dios. Make up your mind.
722
00:32:56,872 --> 00:33:00,374
Look, I only agreed for things
going back to the way they were
723
00:33:00,376 --> 00:33:02,555
because I am a terrific coward.
724
00:33:03,125 --> 00:33:05,719
I don't actually want that.
725
00:33:06,180 --> 00:33:08,599
Besides, I don't think it can happen.
726
00:33:08,727 --> 00:33:11,680
So I'll hire someone to
manage you instead of me...
727
00:33:11,938 --> 00:33:14,722
a great, big, non-seduceable dude
728
00:33:14,724 --> 00:33:16,106
with no homosexual leanings.
729
00:33:16,142 --> 00:33:17,808
Listen, will you just... I am trying to...
730
00:33:17,860 --> 00:33:19,523
God, woman, you are difficult.
731
00:33:19,697 --> 00:33:21,614
You just lock your jaws and won't let go.
732
00:33:21,688 --> 00:33:22,914
And I'm helpless...
733
00:33:23,250 --> 00:33:24,466
every time.
734
00:33:24,491 --> 00:33:26,992
I am completely helpless against you, Jo.
735
00:33:27,017 --> 00:33:30,051
The way we fight... God, it's exhausting
736
00:33:30,076 --> 00:33:33,294
and hot and exhilarating
and, frankly, weird,
737
00:33:33,492 --> 00:33:34,742
but you know what?
738
00:33:34,744 --> 00:33:36,827
I cannot imagine sparring
739
00:33:36,879 --> 00:33:38,711
with anyone else ever.
740
00:33:40,227 --> 00:33:42,333
Well, I'm sure there are
plenty of ladies out there
741
00:33:42,385 --> 00:33:44,001
- for you to sword-fight.
- No, no, no.
742
00:33:44,053 --> 00:33:46,503
See, now I believe that all
of those were just replacements
743
00:33:46,555 --> 00:33:48,266
for you, Josephine.
744
00:33:48,291 --> 00:33:51,842
They... those women, they
were just one off and good-bye,
745
00:33:51,894 --> 00:33:53,477
but you, I...
746
00:33:53,852 --> 00:33:55,679
I can't stop thinking about you.
747
00:33:55,836 --> 00:33:58,182
I wake up, and I cannot stop imagining
748
00:33:58,234 --> 00:33:59,850
how we might be together.
749
00:33:59,902 --> 00:34:01,518
I am... God help me...
750
00:34:01,570 --> 00:34:03,234
I am in love with you.
751
00:34:10,413 --> 00:34:12,281
You're insane, you know that?
752
00:34:13,148 --> 00:34:16,617
Not... significantly more than you are.
753
00:34:19,505 --> 00:34:20,414
Hmm.
754
00:34:21,340 --> 00:34:22,867
Hmm, okay.
755
00:34:23,342 --> 00:34:24,406
Well...
756
00:34:26,629 --> 00:34:29,296
Weddings tend to make
people... lose their minds,
757
00:34:29,348 --> 00:34:31,965
and that's why the alcohol's free, so...
758
00:34:32,018 --> 00:34:33,336
go at it.
759
00:34:36,939 --> 00:34:39,857
And to have and to hold
760
00:34:39,892 --> 00:34:41,108
from this day forward.
761
00:34:41,143 --> 00:34:42,693
For better... for better...
For better or for...
762
00:34:42,728 --> 00:34:43,977
Is it time to go?
763
00:34:44,030 --> 00:34:45,396
It's time to go to the church, you guys.
764
00:34:45,448 --> 00:34:46,697
You've got a few minutes.
765
00:34:46,732 --> 00:34:48,195
This came via messenger.
766
00:34:48,534 --> 00:34:49,650
Today?
767
00:34:49,702 --> 00:34:51,318
Okay, thank you.
768
00:35:31,780 --> 00:35:33,496
- Sorry. I have to take this.
- Okay.
769
00:35:34,375 --> 00:35:35,990
Hey, Kat.
770
00:35:36,026 --> 00:35:37,859
Um, now's not a very good time, but I...
771
00:35:37,911 --> 00:35:39,742
It must be. This book is gibberish.
772
00:35:39,767 --> 00:35:41,166
What do you mean it's gibberish?
773
00:35:41,191 --> 00:35:43,608
You loved the first
chapters that I sent you.
774
00:35:43,633 --> 00:35:45,500
Yeah. Yeah. What did you do with those?
775
00:35:45,809 --> 00:35:48,059
'Cause now they're as riveting
as reading the instructions
776
00:35:48,084 --> 00:35:49,500
on my universal remote.
777
00:35:50,313 --> 00:35:52,492
I-I just tweaked them.
778
00:35:52,517 --> 00:35:55,568
I-I certainly didn't
turn them into gibberish.
779
00:35:55,593 --> 00:35:57,510
Listen, you need to get your shit together.
780
00:35:57,555 --> 00:35:59,722
Just tell me what meds you need
781
00:35:59,757 --> 00:36:02,174
and how long you need when
you can get me a do-over.
782
00:36:02,226 --> 00:36:04,143
A do-over?
A do-over?
783
00:36:04,178 --> 00:36:05,311
The whole book?
784
00:36:05,346 --> 00:36:07,555
How am I supposed to get a whole do-over?
785
00:36:07,580 --> 00:36:10,086
I mean, how...
786
00:36:11,089 --> 00:36:12,472
Really?
787
00:36:12,874 --> 00:36:13,923
It is that bad?
788
00:36:14,022 --> 00:36:15,438
I mean, it's, like,
789
00:36:15,720 --> 00:36:17,386
the whole thing, a lost cause?
790
00:36:17,411 --> 00:36:19,164
Abby, it's a total disaster.
791
00:36:24,115 --> 00:36:25,865
Sorry. This is a private area.
792
00:36:25,867 --> 00:36:26,984
Excuse us for a moment.
793
00:36:36,367 --> 00:36:38,063
I received an envelope...
794
00:36:39,365 --> 00:36:40,865
with photos...
795
00:36:43,982 --> 00:36:45,250
You and Albert.
796
00:36:48,009 --> 00:36:49,695
You looked like you were having fun.
797
00:36:50,475 --> 00:36:53,275
It wasn't fun. It was ugly and desperate.
798
00:36:53,311 --> 00:36:56,112
It was. I know it was. I saw that.
799
00:36:56,147 --> 00:36:58,114
What I didn't know was that my future wife
800
00:36:58,149 --> 00:36:59,703
was so ugly and desperate.
801
00:37:01,758 --> 00:37:03,308
Gordon, I've been terrified...
802
00:37:03,343 --> 00:37:04,559
You've been terrified?
803
00:37:04,594 --> 00:37:06,177
You've been terrified?
804
00:37:06,179 --> 00:37:07,345
Of what?
805
00:37:07,347 --> 00:37:09,031
What have you been terrified of?
806
00:37:10,684 --> 00:37:12,539
Having a husband that adores you?
807
00:37:12,853 --> 00:37:14,903
Someone that would give you
anything that you wanted?
808
00:37:14,938 --> 00:37:16,858
Gordon, this whole time
all I've wanted is you!
809
00:37:16,907 --> 00:37:18,490
No, it looks like you wanted your boss!
810
00:37:18,525 --> 00:37:21,192
No, I didn't! I didn't!
811
00:37:21,244 --> 00:37:23,528
I told myself I never
wanted to get married,
812
00:37:23,580 --> 00:37:26,998
and you and this big
wedding and your big life...
813
00:37:27,033 --> 00:37:29,367
I just felt like it
was swallowing me whole.
814
00:37:29,369 --> 00:37:30,805
Oh, so you spread your legs?
815
00:37:33,373 --> 00:37:35,039
Not the part of me that loves you,
816
00:37:35,041 --> 00:37:36,591
just the ugly, desperate part.
817
00:37:36,626 --> 00:37:39,427
- I'm so disgusted with myself.
- You should be.
818
00:37:41,298 --> 00:37:42,764
I didn't think there was anything
819
00:37:42,799 --> 00:37:43,882
that you could do, anything.
820
00:37:47,757 --> 00:37:49,711
And you have. You've done it.
821
00:37:52,392 --> 00:37:53,775
You ruined it.
822
00:37:55,478 --> 00:37:58,479
Oh, my...
823
00:37:59,649 --> 00:38:01,065
Oh, God. We should, um...
824
00:38:02,402 --> 00:38:04,285
Tell someone so that everybody can go home.
825
00:38:04,321 --> 00:38:05,703
That's what you want, right?
826
00:38:05,739 --> 00:38:07,238
- How could you do this?
- To call it off?
827
00:38:07,290 --> 00:38:10,600
You wanted to humiliate
me in front of 250 people?
828
00:38:10,625 --> 00:38:11,459
No.
829
00:38:11,494 --> 00:38:13,745
In front of my friends, my family?
830
00:38:13,797 --> 00:38:15,213
Right, my friends.
831
00:38:15,248 --> 00:38:16,445
My family!
832
00:38:16,784 --> 00:38:18,667
Because you don't have either.
833
00:38:19,125 --> 00:38:20,552
I should've been paying attention to that.
834
00:38:20,587 --> 00:38:22,387
Gordon, I'm so sorry. I hate myself.
835
00:38:22,422 --> 00:38:24,305
I don't want to hear your tears. Don't cry.
836
00:38:24,341 --> 00:38:25,840
That doesn't help anything.
837
00:38:25,892 --> 00:38:27,859
Crying isn't gonna get us out of this.
838
00:38:29,429 --> 00:38:32,597
Jesus.
839
00:38:34,086 --> 00:38:36,184
I got nothing. I can't
come up with anything.
840
00:38:36,236 --> 00:38:38,519
The only thing I can think of is
going out and telling everybody
841
00:38:38,572 --> 00:38:41,072
that the wedding is off
because the bride is a whore.
842
00:38:42,859 --> 00:38:44,776
What do you think? You
have any better ideas?
843
00:38:44,828 --> 00:38:45,944
I'll do anything.
844
00:38:45,946 --> 00:38:47,875
Please, just tell me what you want.
845
00:38:49,141 --> 00:38:51,391
Please.
846
00:39:06,600 --> 00:39:08,883
Looks like the WASP’s are getting restless.
847
00:39:09,102 --> 00:39:11,636
- Where's our bride?
- That is a very good question.
848
00:39:11,688 --> 00:39:14,188
- Shouldn't we be starting now?
- Yes.
849
00:39:16,810 --> 00:39:18,373
Come on, hurry up. We're already late.
850
00:39:18,398 --> 00:39:21,062
Gordon, you can't be serious.
I would never make you do this.
851
00:39:21,114 --> 00:39:22,447
Too bad. I'm making you do it.
852
00:39:22,482 --> 00:39:23,564
You are?
853
00:39:23,617 --> 00:39:25,316
You said that you would do anything.
854
00:39:25,586 --> 00:39:27,235
Now, you owe me at least that much.
855
00:39:27,287 --> 00:39:28,569
Now, we are going downstairs,
856
00:39:28,622 --> 00:39:30,221
and we are gonna walk down that aisle.
857
00:39:30,563 --> 00:39:34,367
You are gonna pretend to be
a perfectly respectable bride.
858
00:39:34,942 --> 00:39:36,875
We are gonna put on a show.
859
00:40:37,607 --> 00:40:41,225
I, Gordon, take thee, Delia,
860
00:40:41,277 --> 00:40:42,727
to be my wife.
861
00:40:42,779 --> 00:40:45,697
I, Delia, take thee, Gordon,
862
00:40:45,732 --> 00:40:48,399
as my wedded husband.
863
00:40:48,451 --> 00:40:51,069
Until death do us part.
864
00:41:51,789 --> 00:41:57,765
-- Synced and corrected by ChrisKe --
-- www.addic7ed.com --
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