Original subtitles

Femme Fatales 1x01 Behind Locked Doors Original Air Date on April 16, 2011

== sync, corrected by elderman ==

[Announcer] Exclusive--

Hollywood starlet Lacey Rivers

has reached a new low--

running over innocent pedestrians,

and this time she's going to jail.

[Man] I think when Lacey Rivers

started off doing commercials,

when she had the TV series,

doing guest spots,

she was wonderful. She was a rocket.

Then... to call her a train wreck--

right now I think she's a train wreck.

[Announcer] Lacey Rivers is a train wreck.

On drugs!

I told you-- [bleep]

I'm still talking to you!

The actress was arrested

outside a posh L.A. nightclub this weekend

for reckless endangerment

after running over a family of German tourists

while drunk, high on cocaine,

and Tweeting behind the wheel.

When I was young,

I went through my wild times, too.

I mean, that was before I settled down, of course,

you know, with Hannah.

[giggles] [giggles]

And Pepper.

Yeah, I can always rely on Lacey

to do something totally inappropriate.

You know, I get 12,000 text messages a day,

but I don't read them while driving.

Lacey? Let me tell you

a little something about Lacey, okay?

Lacey only dated me because of my Y star status, okay?

I hope the little tramp rots in hell, you know?

I mean, look at her. Look at me.

I can't even afford a haircut. [bleep]

[fans cheering] [Woman] I love you so much!

[Announcer] Fans rallied to her support today

in an L.A. Superior Court hearing,

where she was sentenced to 18 months behind bars.

Looks like this part-time princess

is about to find herself behind locked doors.

[Woman] Are you from the South?

[Lacey] No. Chicago.

I thought I detected a slight southern twang.

Oh, a heart tattoo. Sexy.

You're going to be real popular in here.

I'm popular everywhere.

Tell that to the poor pedestrians you mowed down

while Tweeting behind the wheel.

I should be in Prague right now shooting a movie.

Well, somebody better call Dakota Fanning

because it looks like you're going to be unavailable!

[screaming]

♪ I've got my eye on you ♪

♪ I've got my eye on you ♪

♪ And I'm hooked, dear, too ♪

♪ Your fooling around's ♪

♪ Getting blood on my shoes, oh ♪

♪ Whoa-oa, oh, oh ♪

♪ Whoa-oa ♪

♪ I've set my sights on you ♪

♪ I've set my sights on you ♪

♪ I've got an alibi, too ♪

♪ So don't look around ♪

♪ I've got nothing to lose ♪

♪ Whoa-oa, oh, oh ♪

♪ Whoa-oa, oh, oh ♪

♪ Whoa-oa ♪

♪ Whoa-oa, oh, oh ♪

♪ Whoa-oa ♪

[gunshot]

[steel clatters]

[shuts]

[keys rattle]

Sorry it's not exactly a designer

you can wear on the red carpet,

but I'm sure you'll make it work.

[women chattering]

[yelling]

Welcome to hell, princess.

[chuckles]

Prison can be a very scary place--

survival of the fittest and all that.

What's a spoiled young Hollywood actress to do

when thrown into the tank with all those sharks?

Those are just the prison guards.

No, Lacey Rivers is going to have to rely

on her one skill she can count on--

her acting.

You don't get 5 million a picture

without any talent.

Behind these locked doors, our little Lacey

is about to give the performance of her life.

Almost home, princess.

Can you please stop calling me that?

But you were so memorable

as that feisty teenage princess

who escapes her magical kingdom to go on Spring Break.

How are you still single?

[grunts]

Just remember, you are in my castle now, princess,

and I'm the queen around here!

You got that?

[buzzer sounds]

Officer, show this tramp to her suite.

Enjoy your stay.

[inmates shouting]

You okay?

Sorry, uh...

about her.

We're not all like that.

Come on.

[door clangs shut]

Uh...

I'm Lacey.

So what are you in for?

Oh.

Okay. Uh...

Just trying to be sociable,

you know, considering we're stuck in here together.

I've never really had roommates, you know.

I've always had a place of my own.

Listen, honey, I'm not your roommate.

We're not going to be sharing makeup tips

or braiding each other's hair.

So keep your mouth shut

and stay out of my way.

Didn't mean to scare you.

I'm Big Aggie.

Lacey.

Oh, I know who you are.

I'm your number 1 fan.

Don't fight me, darling.

This could be the beginning of a great love story.

You can play Juliet...

just like in the movies.

Uhh...

Ow!

Let her go, Aggie.

Take a hike, Camille.

This ain't your concern.

[whimpering]

Hi, baby.

She's not into you.

What?

I said she's not your type.

♪ [rockabilly]

Hi.

You mind if I...

Thanks.

You saved my ass.

You gotta get a t tougher

if you want to survive around here.

What happened to her?

One of Aggie's girls.

That's how she marks her territory.

How can they let her get away with that?

Who?

Maxine?

She's a bigger psycho than Aggie.

What about him?

Cutie-pie over there.

Rafe?

Poor sap. He's got no pull here.

Maxine calls all the shots.

[phone rings]

[Man] Crow's nest. Mm-hm. Hold on.

Max, got a call.

Yeah.

Hey, how y'all doin'?

Same old shit here.

Just palm trees.

You got that info I asked you for?

Really?

Uh-huh.

Fax it on over when it's ready.

So why are you here?

I killed my husband.

Oh.

Stabbed him in the chest six times.

Jesus. You must've been really pissed at him.

Same old Lifetime movie.

He used me as a punching bag every night he'd come home

after a bottle of whiskey.

I felt worthless. Thought I deserved it.

My only hope was Rhonda.

Rhonda?

She lived down the road from me.

In the same trailer park?

[chuckles]

I didn't live in a trailer park.

Oh. Sorry.

I fell real hard for that one.

So you're a...

Don't worry. You're not my type.

I did a guest spot on The L Word,

so I'm like totally cool with you guys.

[laughs]

Eddie walked in on us.

[moans]

He wt bat-shit crazy.

[yells]

I grabbed the nearest thing that I could find,

and it happened to be a butcher knife.

Why did you have a butcher knife in the bedroom?

We were on the kitchen table.

Oh.

So it was self-defense.

Yeah.

That's not how the jury saw it.

I got 20 years.

[whistle blows]

Roll call!

Rand! Yeah.

Batchko! Here.

O'Rourke! Here.

Cheney! Yep.

Dorith! All right.

Ferguson! Here.

Kelly Otis! Here.

Martinez! Yeah!

Nixon! Yeah.

O'Reiley! Here.

Rivers!

Rivers?

Rivers!

Oh, here.

I think me and you need to have a little talk.

See, when I set my sights on something, get it.

Don't I, baby girl?

Why don't you and me...

go somewhere where we can get comfy

and talk about it?

What do you say, huh?

I say...

go to hell.

Mm-hmm.

I'm gonna carve you like a pumpkin.

Bitches.

Did you get a hint now?

Nobody will ever want that ugly mug of yours.

Stop it, you fucking bitch. You're going to kill her!

Enough, Max.

Causing trouble again, Camille?

She's lying. That fucking dyke did it.

You better watch your pretty mouth.

Back to your cells.

Looks like you're going to be checking into the hole.

Think you can handle the night off carpet duty?

I'm gonna fucking kill you.

Sweet talker. [chuckles]

You okay?

It's not fair.

It's-- It's prison.

You've got to help me.

I'm never going to make it.

You're safe now.

Come on.

[door shuts]

Where's Camille?

Don't worry about Camille.

I want to talk about money.

What money?

The hundred grand you're going to give me.

Why would I give you any money?

Two words--

Little Rock.

Yeah. See, I'm from Arkansas, too, princess,

and I got friends back home,

lots of friends in the force.

I've got information.

Yeah. So you are going to give me your money.

Nighty-night, princess.

[Man on TV] I can't believe you lied to me.

[Lacey on TV] I'm sorry.

You don't understand. I had to.

When I was a little girl,

my dad came to me,

and he told me that I was different,

that I was special--

a princess.

And I knew from then on

that I would never have real friends,

that I would always just be royalty.

So I told myself

that one day I would flee the kingdom,

and I would find real friends

and my true love.

[weeping] And I found you.

You don't know the meaning of true love,

but I do.

I love you.

I love you, Jake. I love you so much.

I love you, Rafe.

I love you so much.

[door shuts]

[footsteps]

Was it horrible?

Fucking Maxine.

She'll get what she deserves.

I missed you.

I need you, Camille.

You're the only person I can trust.

You're not my type.

[panting, moaning]

[moans]

Shh.

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