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1
00:00:00,075 --> 00:00:01,157
LIAM: Previously on "Faking It"...
2
00:00:01,158 --> 00:00:02,659
I'll let you crash on my couch.
3
00:00:03,647 --> 00:00:05,780
My attempts at flirting can
come off as being a dick.
4
00:00:05,781 --> 00:00:06,982
SHANE: You like me?
5
00:00:06,983 --> 00:00:08,984
You're saving yourself for Felix.
6
00:00:08,985 --> 00:00:10,384
We can't have a thing.
7
00:00:10,385 --> 00:00:11,435
Not until New Year's Eve.
8
00:00:11,436 --> 00:00:13,270
It turns out I'm Jewish.
9
00:00:13,271 --> 00:00:14,805
Oh, mazel tov.
10
00:00:14,806 --> 00:00:16,640
I've always thought that I was straight,
11
00:00:16,641 --> 00:00:18,309
and now I'm starting to
think that maybe I'm not.
12
00:00:18,310 --> 00:00:19,443
AMY: I'm here for you.
13
00:00:21,647 --> 00:00:24,698
(UPBEAT MUSIC)
14
00:00:24,699 --> 00:00:26,033
15
00:00:26,034 --> 00:00:27,484
(KNOCKING)
16
00:00:27,485 --> 00:00:29,147
Karma, it's late.
17
00:00:29,148 --> 00:00:31,264
If this another attempt
to make me a Belieber...
18
00:00:31,265 --> 00:00:34,070
No, even though he is a
legitimate musician.
19
00:00:34,071 --> 00:00:36,090
Um, that's not why I'm here.
20
00:00:38,073 --> 00:00:40,523
Seeing how close you and
Sabrina were tonight
21
00:00:40,524 --> 00:00:42,659
at game night,
22
00:00:42,660 --> 00:00:44,527
it drove me a little crazy.
23
00:00:44,528 --> 00:00:47,914
And I think I finally realize why.
24
00:00:55,653 --> 00:00:58,153
No. No, I cannot go back there with you.
25
00:00:58,877 --> 00:01:00,176
(SIGHS)
26
00:01:01,713 --> 00:01:05,848
WOMAN:
All of our last days
27
00:01:05,849 --> 00:01:09,268
Maybe you can go there with me.
28
00:01:09,269 --> 00:01:12,939
WOMAN:
Are lost without a trace
29
00:01:12,940 --> 00:01:15,224
30
00:01:15,225 --> 00:01:18,728
- (ALARM RINGING)
- (GASPS)
31
00:01:18,729 --> 00:01:21,314
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
32
00:01:22,750 --> 00:01:24,857
Dude, I'm having major d?j? vu.
33
00:01:24,858 --> 00:01:27,076
In your defense, Sabrina is tr?s hot.
34
00:01:27,077 --> 00:01:30,029
(SIGHS) Hot or not, I can't
fall for another friend
35
00:01:30,030 --> 00:01:32,248
who's probably just gonna
turn out to be straight.
36
00:01:32,249 --> 00:01:35,151
Wait. As in it's possible she's not?
37
00:01:35,885 --> 00:01:37,134
Your face says I'm right!
38
00:01:37,135 --> 00:01:38,363
Okay! (SIGHS)
39
00:01:38,364 --> 00:01:42,719
Sabrina may have had a sexy
female dream of her own,
40
00:01:42,720 --> 00:01:44,804
but you cannot tell a
soul, especially Karma.
41
00:01:44,805 --> 00:01:48,391
And if Sabrina does
decide she likes girls,
42
00:01:48,392 --> 00:01:50,276
then maybe you two can end up together.
43
00:01:50,277 --> 00:01:51,477
Let's talk about something else.
44
00:01:51,478 --> 00:01:53,313
Oh, how are you and Noah?
45
00:01:53,314 --> 00:01:54,530
Do not change the subject.
46
00:01:54,531 --> 00:01:56,783
Why? What's the first subject?
47
00:01:56,784 --> 00:01:57,817
(SQUEAKS)
48
00:01:58,870 --> 00:02:01,454
Uh, how much...
49
00:02:01,455 --> 00:02:03,456
I love Cholula.
50
00:02:03,457 --> 00:02:06,326
But, uh, it makes me gassy.
51
00:02:06,327 --> 00:02:08,795
So I'm gonna go.
52
00:02:14,836 --> 00:02:16,552
Why is she wearing her crush boots?
53
00:02:16,553 --> 00:02:18,504
- Her what boots?
- Her crush boots.
54
00:02:18,505 --> 00:02:20,056
They kill her arches,
so she only wears them
55
00:02:20,057 --> 00:02:22,175
when she's trying to get
someone's attention.
56
00:02:22,176 --> 00:02:23,393
Who is it?
57
00:02:24,346 --> 00:02:25,678
It can't be Felix.
58
00:02:25,679 --> 00:02:26,980
She already has his attention.
59
00:02:26,981 --> 00:02:29,849
The only other new person
in her orbit is...
60
00:02:29,850 --> 00:02:30,850
Sabrina?
61
00:02:30,851 --> 00:02:32,602
- Your face says I'm right.
- Damn!
62
00:02:32,603 --> 00:02:34,604
Amy's just gonna get her
heart broken all over again.
63
00:02:34,605 --> 00:02:36,356
Pump the brakes, McSchemey.
64
00:02:36,357 --> 00:02:38,024
Don't go meddling like you always do.
65
00:02:38,025 --> 00:02:40,693
Just maybe let her work
this one out on her own?
66
00:02:40,694 --> 00:02:42,862
Why? Is there something
else you're not telling me?
67
00:02:42,863 --> 00:02:45,031
Nope! Mmm.
68
00:02:45,032 --> 00:02:46,833
(MUFFLED) Eggs on tacos.
69
00:02:46,834 --> 00:02:48,284
Who knew?
70
00:02:48,285 --> 00:02:49,585
Mmm, mmm!
71
00:02:49,586 --> 00:02:54,007
Sync and corrections by btsix
www.addic7ed.com
72
00:02:54,008 --> 00:02:55,875
Put down the baby Jesus.
73
00:02:55,876 --> 00:02:57,677
Okay, okay. Sorry.
74
00:02:57,678 --> 00:02:59,712
Just wanted to set out
the menorah I made,
75
00:02:59,713 --> 00:03:01,431
but apparently I'm living
76
00:03:01,432 --> 00:03:03,049
in the Christmas section of Target.
77
00:03:03,050 --> 00:03:04,684
Christmas is the best...
78
00:03:04,685 --> 00:03:07,887
The smell of fir trees, the
crackle of the fireplace...
79
00:03:07,888 --> 00:03:10,056
The crushing weight of
American consumerism
80
00:03:10,057 --> 00:03:12,642
wiping out any real
meaning to the holiday...
81
00:03:12,643 --> 00:03:14,477
I can still kick you out.
82
00:03:14,478 --> 00:03:16,446
And until then, as your
official roommate,
83
00:03:16,447 --> 00:03:17,897
shouldn't I get to also decorate?
84
00:03:17,898 --> 00:03:19,732
You've been Jewish for,
like, five minutes.
85
00:03:19,733 --> 00:03:21,150
Do you even know what Hanukkah's about?
86
00:03:21,151 --> 00:03:22,819
Yeah, it's about the
dedication of the temple
87
00:03:22,820 --> 00:03:23,903
during the Macca...
88
00:03:23,904 --> 00:03:24,988
Okay, got it.
89
00:03:24,989 --> 00:03:26,539
No need for the whole holy history.
90
00:03:26,540 --> 00:03:28,541
(SIGHS) Fine.
91
00:03:28,542 --> 00:03:31,210
You can put your Hanukkah stuff...
92
00:03:31,211 --> 00:03:32,912
here.
93
00:03:32,913 --> 00:03:34,914
That's, like, one square foot.
94
00:03:35,967 --> 00:03:37,300
Which is all I need.
95
00:03:37,301 --> 00:03:38,968
Mm-hmm.
96
00:03:38,969 --> 00:03:40,386
(SIGHS)
97
00:03:42,724 --> 00:03:46,175
(GASPS) Maybe you're an Ellen Page type.
98
00:03:46,176 --> 00:03:48,311
Or a Portia de Rossi...
99
00:03:48,312 --> 00:03:49,429
if you like pant suits.
100
00:03:49,430 --> 00:03:50,596
(LAUGHS)
101
00:03:50,597 --> 00:03:52,932
Man, who knew exploring my sexuality
102
00:03:52,933 --> 00:03:54,400
would be so fun?
103
00:03:54,401 --> 00:03:55,902
And you make a pretty bomb tour guide.
104
00:03:55,903 --> 00:03:58,488
Uh... (LAUGHS NERVOUSLY)
105
00:03:58,489 --> 00:03:59,939
Oh, speaking of exploring,
106
00:03:59,940 --> 00:04:01,574
we should head up Lezbingo tonight.
107
00:04:01,575 --> 00:04:03,359
Oh, that's a real thing?
108
00:04:03,360 --> 00:04:05,661
Well, we're not gonna find
answers in a magazine.
109
00:04:05,662 --> 00:04:08,197
We need to find you a girl to kiss.
110
00:04:08,198 --> 00:04:09,866
KARMA: Hey, ladies.
111
00:04:09,867 --> 00:04:10,950
Get this.
112
00:04:10,951 --> 00:04:13,619
Tonight the three amigas, movie-oke.
113
00:04:13,620 --> 00:04:14,954
- Movie-what-e?
- Movie-oke.
114
00:04:14,955 --> 00:04:17,623
It's like karaoke but for movies.
115
00:04:17,624 --> 00:04:19,625
Alamo Drafthouse is doing "Mean Girls."
116
00:04:19,626 --> 00:04:24,130
Sabrina, you would be a
killer Regina George.
117
00:04:24,131 --> 00:04:25,465
Thanks, Karm,
118
00:04:25,466 --> 00:04:27,467
but Amy and I have plans.
119
00:04:27,468 --> 00:04:28,601
We have homework.
120
00:04:28,602 --> 00:04:31,304
We have to write that
essay about Malala.
121
00:04:31,305 --> 00:04:34,607
Yeah, for World Studies
that we're both in.
122
00:04:34,608 --> 00:04:36,642
And you're not, so rain check?
123
00:04:36,643 --> 00:04:38,895
You can't rain check
something like this.
124
00:04:38,896 --> 00:04:39,812
(GONG SOUNDS)
125
00:04:39,813 --> 00:04:41,064
Oh. (LAUGHS NERVOUSLY)
126
00:04:41,065 --> 00:04:42,198
Speaking of class...
127
00:04:42,199 --> 00:04:43,816
Bye!
128
00:04:45,036 --> 00:04:47,320
Okay, Sabrina, you need to be careful.
129
00:04:47,321 --> 00:04:48,821
Is that some sort of threat?
130
00:04:48,822 --> 00:04:50,323
Because I don't scare easy.
131
00:04:50,324 --> 00:04:51,407
What? No.
132
00:04:51,408 --> 00:04:52,825
I mean for Amy's sake.
133
00:04:52,826 --> 00:04:54,794
She's starting to have feelings for you.
134
00:04:54,795 --> 00:04:57,130
It's true. Trust me.
135
00:04:57,131 --> 00:04:58,748
You probably don't even
know all the little ways
136
00:04:58,749 --> 00:05:00,583
you're sending her the wrong signals.
137
00:05:00,584 --> 00:05:02,418
Amy told you this?
138
00:05:02,419 --> 00:05:04,887
I'm her best friend, she didn't have to.
139
00:05:04,888 --> 00:05:07,423
You two should probably stop
hanging out alone so much.
140
00:05:07,424 --> 00:05:08,758
Avoid sleepovers
141
00:05:08,759 --> 00:05:10,510
or any gooey talks
about your friendship.
142
00:05:10,511 --> 00:05:13,146
(LAUGHS) You almost had me.
143
00:05:13,147 --> 00:05:14,230
Very convincing.
144
00:05:14,231 --> 00:05:15,565
You know, you're right,
145
00:05:15,566 --> 00:05:17,066
you're not the same
girl you were at camp,
146
00:05:17,067 --> 00:05:19,185
because that girl couldn't act.
147
00:05:20,522 --> 00:05:21,771
Excuse me.
148
00:05:21,772 --> 00:05:23,356
I was queen of skit night.
149
00:05:23,357 --> 00:05:25,575
They threw marshmallows.
150
00:05:25,576 --> 00:05:27,693
Wait, was that a good thing?
151
00:05:27,694 --> 00:05:30,863
So no band practice tonight?
152
00:05:30,864 --> 00:05:31,864
Nope.
153
00:05:31,865 --> 00:05:33,666
But maybe I could come
over to your place
154
00:05:33,667 --> 00:05:35,952
and give you a private concert.
155
00:05:35,953 --> 00:05:37,253
KARMA: Shane!
156
00:05:37,254 --> 00:05:39,088
Sorry. Am I interrupting?
157
00:05:39,089 --> 00:05:40,123
That's okay.
158
00:05:40,124 --> 00:05:42,208
I'm late for Subversive Literature.
159
00:05:42,209 --> 00:05:43,759
See you later.
160
00:05:45,713 --> 00:05:47,630
Why do people keep
leaving when I show up?
161
00:05:47,631 --> 00:05:48,681
You saw that, right?
162
00:05:48,682 --> 00:05:49,966
I'm not just being paranoid?
163
00:05:49,967 --> 00:05:51,384
Saw what?
164
00:05:51,385 --> 00:05:52,602
How he cools off
165
00:05:52,603 --> 00:05:53,886
just as things start heating up.
166
00:05:53,887 --> 00:05:55,771
(GASPS) That's it.
167
00:05:55,772 --> 00:05:57,440
It's so basic, I almost missed it.
168
00:05:57,441 --> 00:05:59,058
Noah's not out yet.
169
00:05:59,059 --> 00:06:00,693
(SIGHS) At least you're crushing
170
00:06:00,694 --> 00:06:02,311
on someone who could like you back.
171
00:06:02,312 --> 00:06:03,946
Poor Amy.
172
00:06:03,947 --> 00:06:08,201
Maybe she just needs to
focus on her other crush.
173
00:06:12,707 --> 00:06:14,040
(SIGHS)
174
00:06:19,214 --> 00:06:21,047
LAUREN: (GASPS)
175
00:06:21,048 --> 00:06:23,049
Penelope, what are you doing?
176
00:06:23,050 --> 00:06:25,585
Did you declare war on
Christmas like Starbucks?
177
00:06:25,586 --> 00:06:27,136
No, I have nothing against any holiday.
178
00:06:27,137 --> 00:06:29,088
I just can't favor one over another.
179
00:06:29,089 --> 00:06:30,890
And that's why there'll be no
Christmas break this year.
180
00:06:30,891 --> 00:06:32,642
- BOTH: What?
- People might get offended.
181
00:06:32,643 --> 00:06:34,060
Who? Who are these
people that get offended
182
00:06:34,061 --> 00:06:35,428
by pine trees and snowflakes?
183
00:06:35,429 --> 00:06:37,146
And vacation days?
184
00:06:37,147 --> 00:06:38,764
Okay, I don't know, but I'm
sure they're out there.
185
00:06:38,765 --> 00:06:40,099
Why don't we just ask the students
186
00:06:40,100 --> 00:06:41,934
what they think about
losing their holidays?
187
00:06:41,935 --> 00:06:43,486
I am just trying to do what's right.
188
00:06:43,487 --> 00:06:45,688
In an ideal world, everyone
would just wear labels
189
00:06:45,689 --> 00:06:47,523
that told us exactly how
not to offend them,
190
00:06:47,524 --> 00:06:48,574
but they don't.
191
00:06:48,575 --> 00:06:50,109
But what if they did?
192
00:06:50,110 --> 00:06:52,662
If we can get everyone
to label themselves,
193
00:06:52,663 --> 00:06:54,113
can we have our holidays back?
194
00:06:54,114 --> 00:06:56,616
How on Earth do you plan to do that?
195
00:07:00,455 --> 00:07:01,754
Not long now.
196
00:07:01,755 --> 00:07:03,623
Uh, till what?
197
00:07:03,624 --> 00:07:05,791
New Year's, silly.
198
00:07:05,792 --> 00:07:06,959
You and Amy's date.
199
00:07:06,960 --> 00:07:08,344
It's not really a date.
200
00:07:08,345 --> 00:07:10,463
It's more vague and no official plan.
201
00:07:10,464 --> 00:07:12,598
Felix? She likes you.
202
00:07:12,599 --> 00:07:14,550
Set it up. Ask her out for real.
203
00:07:14,551 --> 00:07:16,469
Woo her with a grand gesture.
204
00:07:16,470 --> 00:07:18,971
Well, I don't think I'm
so good at the woo.
205
00:07:18,972 --> 00:07:23,142
Well, lucky for you, 'cause
I am great at the woo.
206
00:07:23,143 --> 00:07:24,644
Come over tonight.
207
00:07:24,645 --> 00:07:26,562
I'm gonna Cyrano the crap out of you.
208
00:07:26,563 --> 00:07:28,030
(CHUCKLES)
209
00:07:30,318 --> 00:07:32,785
At Hester, we take pride
in our differences,
210
00:07:32,786 --> 00:07:34,320
and that's why I'm introducing
211
00:07:34,321 --> 00:07:36,989
Hester's new mandatory
sensitivity census.
212
00:07:36,990 --> 00:07:38,074
It's easy.
213
00:07:38,075 --> 00:07:39,625
You just enter the identity booth
214
00:07:39,626 --> 00:07:42,295
and pick the labels that
best represent who you are.
215
00:07:43,798 --> 00:07:45,581
Be sure to wear your labels proudly
216
00:07:45,582 --> 00:07:47,800
so everyone can support you.
217
00:07:47,801 --> 00:07:49,719
And so that we can have Christmas.
218
00:07:49,720 --> 00:07:51,170
Is that everything?
219
00:07:51,171 --> 00:07:53,139
Look, I want to "ho ho ho"
as much as the next Joe,
220
00:07:53,140 --> 00:07:55,508
but Noah shouldn't be
forced to label himself gay
221
00:07:55,509 --> 00:07:56,509
if he's not ready.
222
00:07:56,510 --> 00:07:57,677
I don't think it counts
223
00:07:57,678 --> 00:07:59,228
when the person's already out.
224
00:07:59,229 --> 00:08:00,429
Hey, there.
225
00:08:00,430 --> 00:08:02,682
Gay there.
226
00:08:02,683 --> 00:08:05,268
Um, is that a surprise?
227
00:08:05,269 --> 00:08:07,103
Do I give off a straight
vibe when we kiss?
228
00:08:07,104 --> 00:08:09,188
(FORCED LAUGHTER) Good one.
229
00:08:09,189 --> 00:08:11,407
So, uh, what about tonight?
You want to come over?
230
00:08:11,408 --> 00:08:14,610
My mom's usually out by 9:00
after half a box of ros?.
231
00:08:14,611 --> 00:08:15,878
I shouldn't.
232
00:08:15,879 --> 00:08:17,580
Big theoretical math test tomorrow
233
00:08:17,581 --> 00:08:20,366
that I will theoretically fail
if I don't hit the books.
234
00:08:20,367 --> 00:08:21,484
Some other time?
235
00:08:21,485 --> 00:08:23,619
Yeah.
236
00:08:23,620 --> 00:08:25,254
See? You were worried for nothing.
237
00:08:25,255 --> 00:08:27,757
Oh, he's hiding something,
just not that he's gay.
238
00:08:27,758 --> 00:08:29,508
Or he just really has to study.
239
00:08:29,509 --> 00:08:30,793
No one at this school studies.
240
00:08:30,794 --> 00:08:32,378
You realize you're probably spinning out
241
00:08:32,379 --> 00:08:33,546
over nothing, right?
242
00:08:33,547 --> 00:08:34,930
Yes.
243
00:08:34,931 --> 00:08:36,215
But we should follow him home tonight
244
00:08:36,216 --> 00:08:37,933
just to be safe.
245
00:08:39,553 --> 00:08:41,687
(UPBEAT MUSIC)
246
00:08:41,688 --> 00:08:43,773
Oh, there he is.
247
00:08:44,322 --> 00:08:46,455
Oh, told you. He's cheating.
248
00:08:46,456 --> 00:08:47,907
Doesn't prove anything.
249
00:08:47,908 --> 00:08:49,408
SHANE: Oh, great.
250
00:08:49,409 --> 00:08:51,295
We got another thruple sitch.
251
00:08:51,296 --> 00:08:52,571
Ah!
252
00:08:54,325 --> 00:08:56,124
You guys looking for a bed tonight?
253
00:08:56,125 --> 00:08:58,911
Uh, sorry, I'm taken, and
he's straight, so...
254
00:08:58,912 --> 00:09:00,746
Wait. What is this place?
255
00:09:00,747 --> 00:09:03,048
Homeless shelter for LGBTQ youth.
256
00:09:03,049 --> 00:09:04,800
Oh. Uh, sorry.
257
00:09:04,801 --> 00:09:07,469
Our mistake. Thanks.
258
00:09:07,470 --> 00:09:10,138
So Noah's cheating with a
bunch of homeless guys.
259
00:09:10,139 --> 00:09:11,974
Huh.
260
00:09:11,975 --> 00:09:14,092
Oh!
261
00:09:16,096 --> 00:09:18,430
Does this... Does this look okay?
262
00:09:18,431 --> 00:09:21,266
She's not gonna be able
to tell from her window.
263
00:09:23,437 --> 00:09:25,237
(PLAYING GUITAR)
264
00:09:25,238 --> 00:09:28,941
We've waited, oh, so patiently
265
00:09:28,942 --> 00:09:32,444
But now I do believe
266
00:09:32,445 --> 00:09:36,114
It's time I ask officially
267
00:09:36,115 --> 00:09:38,417
Be my date to New Year's...
268
00:09:38,418 --> 00:09:39,618
Felix!
269
00:09:39,619 --> 00:09:42,621
Lord, you are just too
cute for your own good.
270
00:09:42,622 --> 00:09:43,789
Hi, Farrah.
271
00:09:43,790 --> 00:09:45,457
Um, is... is Amy home?
272
00:09:45,458 --> 00:09:47,459
Oh, no. Sorry, hon.
273
00:09:47,460 --> 00:09:49,544
Oh, you want me to grab
my phone real quick
274
00:09:49,545 --> 00:09:52,464
and send her a VineTube or a video chat
275
00:09:52,465 --> 00:09:55,300
or whatever it is you
kids use these days?
276
00:09:55,301 --> 00:09:57,970
Amy said she'd be here studying.
277
00:09:57,971 --> 00:09:59,304
Where did she go?
278
00:09:59,305 --> 00:10:01,356
Oh, some bingo thing with Sabrina.
279
00:10:01,357 --> 00:10:03,308
I'm sure she'll be back soon.
280
00:10:03,309 --> 00:10:04,693
Oh, you!
281
00:10:04,694 --> 00:10:06,478
(GIGGLES)
282
00:10:10,317 --> 00:10:13,151
Hey, um, this was a mistake.
283
00:10:13,152 --> 00:10:15,871
Thanks for all the support, but...
284
00:10:15,872 --> 00:10:17,990
I'm gonna head home.
285
00:10:19,743 --> 00:10:22,327
(SIGHS)
286
00:10:22,328 --> 00:10:24,663
Let's go over tomorrow's shift schedule
287
00:10:24,664 --> 00:10:25,831
for the label makers.
288
00:10:25,832 --> 00:10:26,999
Yeah, that'll be quick.
289
00:10:27,000 --> 00:10:28,383
I'm not taking any.
290
00:10:28,384 --> 00:10:29,835
What? Why?
291
00:10:29,836 --> 00:10:32,671
Making people label themselves
doesn't celebrate differences.
292
00:10:32,672 --> 00:10:34,139
It just calls them out.
293
00:10:34,140 --> 00:10:36,508
No, but our holidays are
being held hostage.
294
00:10:36,509 --> 00:10:39,928
That's your battle, not mine.
295
00:10:39,929 --> 00:10:41,563
(SCOFFS)
296
00:10:58,415 --> 00:11:02,167
You sucker-punched that narc
to go to jail with Karma?
297
00:11:02,168 --> 00:11:03,785
- Yeah.
- That's loyalty.
298
00:11:03,786 --> 00:11:05,337
KARMA: That's Amy.
299
00:11:05,338 --> 00:11:07,205
Loyal to a fault.
300
00:11:10,844 --> 00:11:12,594
Sweet tea runs right through me,
301
00:11:12,595 --> 00:11:15,714
so I need to see a man about a horse.
302
00:11:19,103 --> 00:11:21,053
So where were you two?
303
00:11:21,054 --> 00:11:22,854
I can't tell you that. (SIGHS)
304
00:11:22,855 --> 00:11:25,724
I thought we were past all
the secrets and lies.
305
00:11:25,725 --> 00:11:27,275
It's not what you think.
306
00:11:27,276 --> 00:11:29,394
Really? Because I think you
have a crush on Sabrina.
307
00:11:29,395 --> 00:11:31,229
(SIGHS) Damn it, Shane.
308
00:11:31,230 --> 00:11:33,231
It wasn't Shane. It's obvious.
309
00:11:33,232 --> 00:11:34,816
Okay, you got me.
310
00:11:34,817 --> 00:11:36,518
I might have a tiny crush.
311
00:11:36,519 --> 00:11:37,869
But it's not the end of the world.
312
00:11:37,870 --> 00:11:39,454
Amy, how can you say that?
313
00:11:39,455 --> 00:11:41,656
I mean, you've fallen for
a straight friend before.
314
00:11:41,657 --> 00:11:44,209
And I know how much that hurt you.
315
00:11:44,210 --> 00:11:46,211
Thanks for the warning, Officer,
316
00:11:46,212 --> 00:11:47,746
but you don't have to
police my feelings,
317
00:11:47,747 --> 00:11:50,082
especially when they're not about you.
318
00:11:56,974 --> 00:11:58,517
(SIGHS)
319
00:11:59,662 --> 00:12:00,681
Come on, people.
320
00:12:00,682 --> 00:12:01,849
Get your diversity on!
321
00:12:02,792 --> 00:12:04,091
You haven't buttoned up yet?
322
00:12:04,092 --> 00:12:05,259
It's not rocket science.
323
00:12:05,260 --> 00:12:06,761
You like guys. You like girls.
324
00:12:06,762 --> 00:12:09,096
Just (BLEEP) pick "bisexual"
so we can have Christmas!
325
00:12:09,097 --> 00:12:10,548
That might be the strangest thing
326
00:12:10,549 --> 00:12:11,632
I've ever heard anyone say.
327
00:12:11,633 --> 00:12:13,217
LAUREN: Ugh. Excuse me.
328
00:12:13,218 --> 00:12:15,386
You're not the only one I
have to yell at right now.
329
00:12:15,387 --> 00:12:17,021
What the hell is wrong with you?
330
00:12:17,022 --> 00:12:18,506
Hi to you too.
331
00:12:18,507 --> 00:12:20,057
One minute, you're all
Hanukkah and the Maccabees
332
00:12:20,058 --> 00:12:21,459
and blah, blah, blah, and the next,
333
00:12:21,460 --> 00:12:23,227
you're throwing your
menorah in the trash?
334
00:12:23,228 --> 00:12:24,779
What happened to your
heritage, your dad?
335
00:12:24,780 --> 00:12:25,980
Well, that's just it, Lauren.
336
00:12:25,981 --> 00:12:27,448
I got a call yesterday.
337
00:12:27,449 --> 00:12:30,535
My dad had a small estate,
and so they did a DNA test.
338
00:12:30,536 --> 00:12:34,372
Turns out he's not my dad,
so I'm not even Jewish.
339
00:12:37,627 --> 00:12:39,243
Hey, this seat taken?
340
00:12:39,244 --> 00:12:40,995
Well, I was saving it for Adam Lambert,
341
00:12:40,996 --> 00:12:43,414
but I'm starting to
think he's a no-show.
342
00:12:43,415 --> 00:12:44,665
(LAUGHS)
343
00:12:44,666 --> 00:12:47,084
You know you can tell me
absolutely anything, right?
344
00:12:47,085 --> 00:12:49,086
People say I'm the best at listening.
345
00:12:49,087 --> 00:12:51,722
Like, I could provide
references upon request.
346
00:12:51,723 --> 00:12:53,641
That's kind of... odd.
347
00:12:53,642 --> 00:12:55,476
What are you getting at?
348
00:12:55,477 --> 00:12:59,263
It's... okay. I already know.
349
00:12:59,264 --> 00:13:00,848
Know what?
350
00:13:00,849 --> 00:13:04,318
That you're... homeless.
351
00:13:04,319 --> 00:13:05,319
Really?
352
00:13:05,320 --> 00:13:07,438
And how exactly did you figure that out?
353
00:13:07,439 --> 00:13:08,773
Did you follow me?
354
00:13:08,774 --> 00:13:10,741
It's okay. There's nothing
to be ashamed of.
355
00:13:10,742 --> 00:13:13,160
Lots of kids get kicked out
or run away for being gay.
356
00:13:13,161 --> 00:13:15,947
Actually, I'm not ashamed of anything,
357
00:13:15,948 --> 00:13:18,749
and you don't know what the
(BLEEP) you're talking about.
358
00:13:18,750 --> 00:13:21,118
Try not to follow me this time.
359
00:13:23,089 --> 00:13:24,872
AMY: Oh, there you are.
360
00:13:24,873 --> 00:13:28,092
Oh, man! Lauren got to you?
361
00:13:28,093 --> 00:13:29,677
Don't listen to her.
362
00:13:29,678 --> 00:13:31,596
It wasn't Lauren.
363
00:13:31,597 --> 00:13:33,264
Look, you've been an awesome coach,
364
00:13:33,265 --> 00:13:36,767
but I think my slugger
only bats one way.
365
00:13:36,768 --> 00:13:39,270
And now we can both move on.
366
00:13:39,271 --> 00:13:41,055
You don't have to waste your time on me.
367
00:13:41,056 --> 00:13:43,557
It wasn't a waste.
368
00:13:43,558 --> 00:13:46,143
I'm gonna go get us a spot.
369
00:13:47,814 --> 00:13:49,647
Yes! Whoo-hoo!
370
00:13:49,648 --> 00:13:50,948
We have an asexual.
371
00:13:50,949 --> 00:13:52,533
(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)
372
00:13:52,534 --> 00:13:54,819
That leaves us with...
373
00:13:54,820 --> 00:13:56,654
Amy Raudenfeld.
374
00:13:56,655 --> 00:13:58,155
Label! Label!
375
00:13:58,156 --> 00:14:03,127
ALL: (CHANTING) Label!
Label! Label! Label! Label!
376
00:14:03,128 --> 00:14:05,129
Fine! Okay, fine.
377
00:14:05,130 --> 00:14:07,331
(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)
378
00:14:10,670 --> 00:14:12,053
Hey.
379
00:14:12,054 --> 00:14:13,671
Not going to the diversity assembly?
380
00:14:13,672 --> 00:14:16,674
Uh, no, it's... It's a little misguided.
381
00:14:16,675 --> 00:14:19,593
Kind of like my attempt
at a grand gesture.
382
00:14:19,594 --> 00:14:21,562
(SIGHS) No, that was my fault.
383
00:14:21,563 --> 00:14:23,681
I pushed you too far with
the whole singing thing.
384
00:14:23,682 --> 00:14:27,151
Amy likes you for you,
not my version of you.
385
00:14:27,152 --> 00:14:29,570
Well, you know, you were
right about one thing.
386
00:14:29,571 --> 00:14:31,522
I do want to make New Year's official,
387
00:14:31,523 --> 00:14:34,692
so I decided, uh, to give her this.
388
00:14:34,693 --> 00:14:37,194
She can set it to
midnight New Year's Eve.
389
00:14:37,195 --> 00:14:39,947
(LIGHT MUSIC)
390
00:14:39,948 --> 00:14:42,083
Do you think she'll like it?
391
00:14:42,084 --> 00:14:43,617
(CHUCKLES)
392
00:14:43,618 --> 00:14:45,870
I know I'd melt if I got
something like this.
393
00:14:45,871 --> 00:14:50,041
394
00:14:50,042 --> 00:14:52,843
ALL: Label! Label! Label!
395
00:14:52,844 --> 00:14:54,295
This is it!
396
00:14:54,296 --> 00:14:56,263
This is the last piece of
the sensitivity puzzle.
397
00:14:56,264 --> 00:14:58,049
ALL: Label! Label! Label!
398
00:14:58,050 --> 00:15:00,051
WOMAN:
I want to be your boyfriend
399
00:15:00,052 --> 00:15:01,802
And I want to be your girlfriend
400
00:15:01,803 --> 00:15:04,805
(SONG CONTINUES)
401
00:15:04,806 --> 00:15:07,558
402
00:15:07,559 --> 00:15:08,609
(SIGHS)
403
00:15:08,610 --> 00:15:11,896
ALL: Label! Label! Label! Label!
404
00:15:11,897 --> 00:15:13,564
(CHANTING FADES)
405
00:15:17,070 --> 00:15:18,202
What?
406
00:15:18,203 --> 00:15:19,987
Isn't this what you wanted
407
00:15:19,988 --> 00:15:21,655
so you can get holidays off?
408
00:15:21,656 --> 00:15:23,741
Or did you think that
these labels would, what,
409
00:15:23,742 --> 00:15:26,410
help you understand me better?
410
00:15:26,411 --> 00:15:29,046
Well, good luck with that.
411
00:15:29,047 --> 00:15:30,748
I barely understand myself.
412
00:15:30,749 --> 00:15:32,083
(SCOFFS)
413
00:15:32,084 --> 00:15:33,551
Brad?
414
00:15:33,552 --> 00:15:36,670
If you're proud of your
label, good for you.
415
00:15:36,671 --> 00:15:38,089
Shout it from the rooftop.
416
00:15:38,090 --> 00:15:39,673
BRAD: I'm asexual!
417
00:15:39,674 --> 00:15:41,008
Yeah, mm-hmm.
418
00:15:41,009 --> 00:15:43,894
That's not what I meant. Okay.
419
00:15:43,895 --> 00:15:46,376
What I'm saying is,
420
00:15:47,233 --> 00:15:52,103
I'm a walking pile of contradictions.
421
00:15:52,104 --> 00:15:54,271
(GENTLE MUSIC)
422
00:15:54,272 --> 00:15:58,442
We all are, and none of this equals us.
423
00:15:58,443 --> 00:16:00,945
It's just not that black and white.
424
00:16:00,946 --> 00:16:04,281
And no one should be
pressured to slap on a label
425
00:16:04,282 --> 00:16:06,784
so that someone else can define them.
426
00:16:06,785 --> 00:16:08,169
427
00:16:08,170 --> 00:16:10,004
That's just kind of douchey.
428
00:16:11,791 --> 00:16:13,040
(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)
429
00:16:13,041 --> 00:16:14,425
No labels!
430
00:16:14,426 --> 00:16:16,677
Whoo!
431
00:16:16,678 --> 00:16:18,262
(APPLAUSE)
432
00:16:18,263 --> 00:16:21,465
(GUITAR MUSIC)
433
00:16:21,466 --> 00:16:25,136
434
00:16:25,137 --> 00:16:26,771
(KNOCKING)
435
00:16:27,755 --> 00:16:29,356
Promise I didn't follow you here.
436
00:16:29,357 --> 00:16:31,142
Just made an educated guess.
437
00:16:31,143 --> 00:16:33,527
Look, I got paranoid,
438
00:16:33,528 --> 00:16:35,813
because every time we get close,
439
00:16:35,814 --> 00:16:37,531
you pull away, and...
440
00:16:37,532 --> 00:16:39,533
I've never had that happen before.
441
00:16:39,534 --> 00:16:43,753
And my imagination went to
some pretty dark places
442
00:16:44,791 --> 00:16:46,235
but only because...
443
00:16:48,222 --> 00:16:51,495
I'm really falling for you.
444
00:16:51,496 --> 00:16:53,881
It's been a long time
since I felt like this,
445
00:16:53,882 --> 00:16:56,967
and last time,
446
00:16:56,968 --> 00:16:59,170
I really screwed it up.
447
00:17:00,339 --> 00:17:02,230
I don't want that to happen again.
448
00:17:03,218 --> 00:17:04,925
You're right.
449
00:17:04,926 --> 00:17:06,894
I did pull away,
450
00:17:06,895 --> 00:17:09,480
because I knew if we got too close,
451
00:17:09,481 --> 00:17:10,848
I'd have to tell you...
452
00:17:10,849 --> 00:17:12,817
But now I know, and it's fine.
453
00:17:12,818 --> 00:17:15,352
No, you... you don't know.
454
00:17:15,353 --> 00:17:16,821
I didn't get kicked out
455
00:17:16,822 --> 00:17:20,191
because my parents didn't
accept me for being gay.
456
00:17:20,192 --> 00:17:21,525
(SIGHS)
457
00:17:21,526 --> 00:17:23,244
They didn't accept that their daughter
458
00:17:23,245 --> 00:17:25,412
was actually their son.
459
00:17:26,866 --> 00:17:28,699
Shane, I'm transgender.
460
00:17:30,753 --> 00:17:32,503
(SIGHS) Oh.
461
00:17:32,504 --> 00:17:35,289
I haven't dated anyone
since transitioning.
462
00:17:35,290 --> 00:17:38,542
I know it can be too
much for some people.
463
00:17:40,630 --> 00:17:42,847
And I can see it's too
much for you, so...
464
00:17:42,848 --> 00:17:45,216
Hey, don't.
465
00:17:45,217 --> 00:17:47,635
It's a lot to take in.
466
00:17:47,636 --> 00:17:50,721
But it doesn't change the
way I feel about you.
467
00:17:50,722 --> 00:17:52,723
You can take some time
to think about it.
468
00:17:52,724 --> 00:17:53,807
I don't need to.
469
00:17:53,808 --> 00:17:55,776
Are you sure?
470
00:18:02,401 --> 00:18:04,985
I hereby forgive you for following me.
471
00:18:04,986 --> 00:18:06,153
(CHUCKLES)
472
00:18:06,154 --> 00:18:07,806
But do me a favor.
473
00:18:08,574 --> 00:18:11,122
Don't share this with anyone else.
474
00:18:12,185 --> 00:18:14,929
At my old school, I was "the trans kid."
475
00:18:15,403 --> 00:18:16,740
Here, I'm just Noah.
476
00:18:17,500 --> 00:18:21,385
I get to disclose to people
when I feel comfortable.
477
00:18:22,755 --> 00:18:24,755
I won't tell a soul.
478
00:18:26,759 --> 00:18:28,592
(SIGHS)
479
00:18:31,786 --> 00:18:33,298
(SIGHS)
480
00:18:34,320 --> 00:18:35,482
(ANGRILY) What's this?
481
00:18:35,483 --> 00:18:37,289
I told you I'm not Jewish anymore.
482
00:18:37,290 --> 00:18:38,380
Wasn't that clear?
483
00:18:38,381 --> 00:18:40,129
(SIGHS) The only thing that was clear
484
00:18:40,130 --> 00:18:41,965
was how connected you
feel to your faith...
485
00:18:41,966 --> 00:18:43,349
More than I've ever been.
486
00:18:43,350 --> 00:18:45,184
Well, the amount of
things in here twinkling
487
00:18:45,185 --> 00:18:46,336
says otherwise.
488
00:18:46,337 --> 00:18:48,221
Yeah, but I only love Christmas
489
00:18:48,222 --> 00:18:50,306
because those are the
best memories I have left
490
00:18:50,307 --> 00:18:51,641
of my mom.
491
00:18:53,611 --> 00:18:55,028
Lauren...
492
00:18:55,029 --> 00:18:56,729
Don't try and make this a moment.
493
00:18:56,730 --> 00:18:58,815
I'm just saying you really have
494
00:18:58,816 --> 00:19:00,650
a spiritual connection to Hanukkah.
495
00:19:00,651 --> 00:19:01,734
But the DNA test...
496
00:19:01,735 --> 00:19:03,903
Who cares about a DNA test?
497
00:19:03,904 --> 00:19:06,823
Take it from me, biology
has very little to do
498
00:19:06,824 --> 00:19:08,408
with how you really feel inside.
499
00:19:08,409 --> 00:19:12,378
So if you feel you're
Jewish, then you're Jewish.
500
00:19:14,416 --> 00:19:15,999
(CHUCKLES)
501
00:19:19,721 --> 00:19:21,304
And at least this means
502
00:19:21,305 --> 00:19:23,423
your real dad might still be out there,
503
00:19:23,424 --> 00:19:25,224
alive.
504
00:19:35,320 --> 00:19:38,404
What? Tinsel is super flammable.
505
00:19:39,441 --> 00:19:40,740
(SIGHS)
506
00:19:40,741 --> 00:19:42,325
(LAUGHTER)
507
00:19:42,326 --> 00:19:44,243
You were just like, "You want a label?
508
00:19:44,244 --> 00:19:45,778
How's this for a label?"
509
00:19:45,779 --> 00:19:46,996
- Ugh!
- Ah!
510
00:19:46,997 --> 00:19:48,865
It was just so bad-ass.
511
00:19:48,866 --> 00:19:50,116
You're my new idol.
512
00:19:50,117 --> 00:19:51,951
Sorry, Ronda Rousey.
You got knocked out.
513
00:19:51,952 --> 00:19:53,870
It was kind of fun.
514
00:19:53,871 --> 00:19:55,288
Fun? It was electrifying.
515
00:19:55,289 --> 00:19:56,873
You stood up for what you believe in
516
00:19:56,874 --> 00:19:58,591
and actually inspired change
517
00:19:58,592 --> 00:20:01,461
in them, in me.
518
00:20:01,462 --> 00:20:04,714
Does that mean you still
want to find a girl to kiss?
519
00:20:04,715 --> 00:20:06,849
MAN:
Yeah, I'll come running
520
00:20:06,850 --> 00:20:08,768
I think I already found one.
521
00:20:08,769 --> 00:20:12,688
MAN:
Everybody wants
something for nothing
522
00:20:12,689 --> 00:20:14,357
Okay, I'm doing this myself this time.
523
00:20:14,358 --> 00:20:15,975
You cannot participate.
524
00:20:15,976 --> 00:20:17,944
I'm just here for support.
525
00:20:17,945 --> 00:20:19,529
And curiosity.
526
00:20:19,530 --> 00:20:21,438
Don't worry, I'll hide
behind this bush...
527
00:20:21,439 --> 00:20:23,646
MAN:
When things go away
528
00:20:23,647 --> 00:20:25,745
I'll come running
529
00:20:25,746 --> 00:20:30,266
Sync and corrections by btsix
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530
00:20:30,316 --> 00:20:34,866
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