All language subtitles for Empty Nest s04e15 The Great Escape.eng

Thanks a lot for
fixing me up, Barbara!

That was the worst date
I ever had!

What in the world made you think
we had anything in common?

Well, for one,
he said he was into causes.

No, Barbara, causeways!

He works for
the highway department!

Oh, it was very romantic.

We spent two hours
on the back of a truck

dropping rubber cones
every 20 feet.

What's your point?

You are the worst judge
of people in the entire world.

Nuh-uh, I hate you.

I will never again trust
anything you say, period.

You have terrible judgment
and terrible taste.

You're crazy.
I'm going to the video store.

They're holding ishtar for me.

It's probably just the pool boy.

Coming!

- Hi.
- Hello, who are you?

I'm looking for Barbara Weston.

Oh, she's not here.
I'm her sister, Carol.

- Is she expecting you?
- Sort of.

Four years ago,
I told her I'd be back.

Name is Lou, Lou zinni.

- Who?
- Lou zinni.

- Lou...
- Zinni!

I've heard that name somewhere.

Last night, details at 11:00.

That prison break.

You're one of
the escaped convicts!

Pretty smart for
a highway worker, aren't you?

Oh, my god, a gun.
A convict with a gun.

An escaped convict in my house

with a gun pointing at me.
All right, all right.

Shut up, lady, shut up!

A rude escaped convict
with a gun.

Listen, it's your sister
I'm after, not you.

Now, where is she?
What do you want with her?

Four years ago, she busted me.

I did time.
I wasn't a happy camper.

Now she's going to pay for it.

- You won't get away with this.
- Oh, really, why not?

Because we have an attack dog!

- Where?
- Right there!

Dreyfuss, kill!

Yeah! Kill, kill, kill!
We all love my face!

Kill, kill. Oh, nice attack dog.

Lori, what did the snail say

when he was riding
on the turtle's back?

Whee!

Stop dawdlin'.
We've got a schedule.

It's Friday, they's traffic.

All right, bye-bye.

I'll see ya.
Take care, my baby, now.

All right, Laverne, I'm ready.

The bag is in the car.

Do you really think
a weekend seminar in sarasota

is gonna do us any good?

"Doctors and nurses,
let's communicate."

Let's don't.

Laverne,
it'll be a good experience,

help us work out our problems.

We have no problems.

I'm efficient, you're not.

I'm right, you're wrong.

That's exactly what
I'm talking about, Laverne,

like last week.
Oh, here we go again.

You forget
your lady friend's birthday,

and then I send her a card,
and you complain about it.

Laverne,
it was her 50th birthday.

You don't send a sympathy card!

It was a joke!

I was givin' you
a great sense of humor.

Look, Laverne, it's not like
I don't appreciate the gesture,

but it was
an inappropriate choice.

Well, next time,
send ya own card.

Well, I mean, I would have,

if you'd given me half a chance!

Every time I give you
half a chance,

you take the wrong half.

All right, so what?
So maybe I would've forgotten.

The point is, Laverne,
you made a mistake,

and you just cannot admit
that you're wrong.

And I say, once again,
I saved your inefficient butt.

Cozy setup, fancy place here.

So, uh, who lives here?

Just me, my sister,
and my father.

Get real.

Do you expect me to believe
two women your age

still live at home with daddy?

Carol, bad news.
I couldn't get ishtar.

Oh, Barbara, that's criminal.

Well, well, well.

What, what's going on?
Who are you?

Does the name Lou zinni
ring a bell?

No.

Lou, I'm Lou zinni.

You put me behind bars,
for god's sake.

Are you part of
the Lou zinni gang?

No, no, no, no.
Louis, new word, zinni.

Money laundering, you remember?

- Oh, yeah.
- Ah, ah, ah, ah.

Oh, my god! He's got a gun!

I wouldn't try that,
if I were you.

You got any other weapons
stashed around here?

No, that's it.

Kitchen cupboard, third shelf,
behind the ho-hos.

- Look, ziddy.
- Zinni!

What is it you want from us?

Hey, hey, I'm giving
the orders around here.

Just sit down and shut up.

Do you mind if I use the phone?

It's a local call.

What are we going to do?
Don't you have a plan?

Yeah, I had a very good plan.

It was behind the ho-hos.

Hello, Connie, it's me.

I'm at this house in Miami,
two sisters,

one of them's a looker.

Now, look, I've just got
to wrap up some business here,

and then it's
that villa in Mexico,

just you and me, babe,
just the way we always...

Lou.

It's Lou zinni.

Jeez, look at your tattoo,
for god's sake.

Mr. zinni,
when you made that reference

to one of us being a looker...

shut up.

Before you put me away,

I was averaging 22 grand a year.

Not great, but steady.

I figure, for the four years
I did time,

you owe me 88,000 plus interest.

That's crazy. I don't have
that kind of money.

I'm a cop.

Well, either I get the money,
or I can get very unpleasant.

In prison,
I was known by the nickname

"violent mood swings."

Oh, my god!

All right, look.
I'll get the money.

I've got daddy's bank book.

- That's a good girl.
- You do?

Yes.

Daddy gave you his bank book?

- Yes.
- But daddy's the only one

authorized
to sign for withdrawal.

Not really,
I have power of attorney.

All right, then, it's all set.

Hold it. Daddy gave you
power of attorney?

- Yes.
- But why you?

I'm the oldest. I'm the sanest.

Will you can it, please?

You make me yearn
for solitary, you two.

Listen, you can't do this.

That's our father's
entire life savings.

Oh, a Miami doctor's going
to have cash flow problems.

My, my, that really saddens me.

Boo-hoo, boo-hoo!

It's all set.

Tomorrow morning,
we go to the bank.

By the way,
what else is in there?

You got a safe deposit box?

Yes, but the only thing
that's in it is daddy's will.

How do you know
about daddy's will?

- I'm the executor.
- You're the executor?

Shut up! Just shut up!

The car wouldn't
have broken down

if you hadn't been
such a rotten driver.

The car wouldn't have
broken down, Laverne,

if you hadn't been wrong
about taking that back road.

You two been married long?

We're not married.

We're doctor and nurse.

Well, if you've got 17.50,
you can be whatever you want.

We are doctor and nurse.

Yeah, sure.

You want the room
for an hour or a half hour?

Listen to me.
Our car broke down.

We are tired.
All we need is two rooms.

Only one room left, doctor.

We can't share a room.

How far is the nearest motel?

41 miles down.
That ain't as nice.

Don't have bug zingers.

Fine.

Harry Weston, m.D.
Oh, nice touch!

Whoa, hbo.

In prison, all we got
was basic cable.

Barbara, you're a cop.
Can't you do something?

Take it easy. When we were
in the kitchen before,

I left a note for Charley
in the refrigerator.

Oh, great, Charley.
He can barely read.

Come on,
you've had SWAT training.

Improvise, overpower him.

With what? He's got .45.

We've got knick-knacks.

Barbara,
Lou was desperate for food.

What's another
basic urge man has?

You'd better be talking
about cabinet-making.

Sex.

- Sex?
- Not real.

I'll pretend, I'll fake it.

Carol, you lost a husband
that way.

Barbara...

Look, I'll distract him.

I'll start to seduce him,
and you grab his gun.

Carol, this is not

one of your renaissance
fair performers!

This is a hardened criminal!
Barbara, I can handle it.

This is more than sex.
It's psychological.

The man has been
inadequately parented.

Trust me, I know how to push
all the right buttons.

Oh, Lou.

Lou, I feel so bad
that you were in prison

for such a long time.

There, oh, that's better.

My ample breasts
felt so contained.

I think he really
had the hots for you.

Shut up!

Would you look
at the size of these bugs?

What do they do,
nuclear testing around here?

Oh, oh, I'm so bushed.

Come on, Laverne,
let's get some sleep.

All right, but before
we get settled in,

they's gotta be some rules.

- Rules?
- No sleepwalkin',

no snorin', no spittin' tobacco.

Fine, and I won't
either, Laverne.

Oh, let's get some rest!

Want to watch TV?

No, no, no, no, please.
I just want to sleep.

Johnny, arsenio, or Lem?

Lem, who's Lem?

Local talk show guy.

He's real good.
His sidekick is Roland.

Please shut it off.
I need some sleep.

I want to be fresh
for the seminar.

Okay, I'm kind of
whooped myself.

Yeah, yeah.

Good night.

Oh, oh. Oh!

I can't sleep!

Does that mean
I can't sleep, either?

Carol, we're in trouble.

I don't have daddy's bank book.

I can't get the money.

You mean, you made up
the whole thing?

Well, I was trying to
buy us time.

Hold it.

Are you saying
you can't get the money?

Would you wait
just a minute, please!

So you don't have
power of attorney, after all?

You shouldn't have lied to me.

You shouldn't have
lied to me, either.

Lou, I know your pain.

I knew it.

I knew daddy would never
give you power of attorney,

or make you executor.

No. I am executor.
That part is true.

Oh, by the way, you get nothing.

Connie, we've got
a change in plans.

We're splitting
for Mexico right away.

Pick me up
at 1755 Fairview road.

It's a cul-de-sac.

You know,
it's one of those streets

when you come to the end of it,
it's round.

It's round!
Just get here, will ya?

Oh, and... Connie,
I won't be alone.

We're going to have
company for the ride.

It may be the looker.
I don't know!

Ride, what ride?

There's this thing
called ransom.

My guess is your daddy's
going to pay a pretty penny

to get his daughters back.

I'm going to pack some things.

Does your father
have any golf pants?

He's a doctor, isn't he?

He's going to take us to Mexico?

We need a miracle
to get out of this.

That, or a knight
in shining armor.

It's Charley.
He's going to see the note.

Oh, my god. Where's the beer?

Whoo! That was close.

I'm going to the kitchen
to get us some food.

Ah, no beer. Ah, there it is.

What happened to Charley?

Who knows?

Dreyfuss, dreyfuss,
dreyfuss, dreyfuss.

Dreyfuss to the rescue!

Dreyfuss? Are you kidding?

Dreyfuss, sit down, boy!

Sit down, sit down.

Good boy. Uh-huh.

Now, lay down.
Lay down, dreyfuss.

Lay down. Good boy.

Now, dreyfuss, bite the rope.

Bite the rope, dreyfuss!
Dreyfuss, bite the rope!

Bite the rope, dreyfuss!
Dreyfuss!

- Who is that?
- Our neighbor.

You just let him
come in here like that?

He's a wacky neighbor.

Hey, you gals still awake?

- I'll take care of him.
- No, no, don't hurt him.

We'll, we'll get rid of him.
You better, or I will.

Whoa!

Kinky.

I've died and gone to heaven.

Get out, Charley!

Oh, I know, three's company,
four's a crowd.

Been there.

nice voice.

- Favorite color?
- Purple.

Mine's red.
Greatest song ever writ?

Hoagy Carmichael, stardust.

Wrong, a boy named sue.

Greatest movie line of all time?

That's easy, Casablanca,
bogart's line.

"You'll regret it."

Maybe not today,
maybe not tomorrow,

"but soon, and for
the rest of your life."

- Wrong.
- Wrong?

Roadhouse.

The movie roadhouse
has the best line of all time?

Yeah, Patrick Swayze
is this cooler.

That's like a bouncer,
only better.

And in this scene, he's chewin'
out all the other bouncers,

and he gets right in their face,

and he says, "it's either
my way or the highway."

You think that's better
than Casablanca?

Casablanca oh, lord.

You just like that movie
because Veronica lake's in it.

You've always had a thing
for Veronica lake.

No, I, no, I haven't.
And she wasn't in that movie.

It was Ingrid bergman.

I have seen that dopey movie
two times,

and it was Veronica lake,
your honey.

Laverne,
the whole world knows it's...

It was Ingrid bergman.

This is a perfect example
of what I'm taking about.

You're wrong,
and you won't admit it.

I am not wrong!

Well, you think
you've never been wrong

in your whole life.

Well, that's stupid.

Everybody's been wrong
one time or another.

Oh, well, good.

Well, just give me one example.

Aside from
comin' to work for you?

Yeah, besides that.

Come on, Laverne.
When, when were you wrong?

All right.
All right, you want one?

I'll give you one...

A real doozy
that's haunted me my whole life.

I was 11.

We were in the state academic

grammar school Olympics
in little rock.

It was nip and tuck,

right up to
the tie breaker question,

"who invented the steamboat?"

And all my teammates
kept sayin' "Robert fulton",

Robert fulton."

But I knew they was wrong,
and I was right.

I mean, you might not
believe it,

but I's pretty stubborn
at that age.

You're kidding.

Anyway, I was the team captain,

so I stood up
in front of 800 people

and announced that the inventor
of the steamboat

was Stephen foster.

Now, that whole big auditorium
just broke up laughin'.

Well, maybe it was
funny to them,

but I thought I'd die.

That must have been
awful for you.

Well, it was, at the time.

As a matter of fact, doctor,

you're the first person
I ever told that story to.

But now that I've got it
off my chest,

it don't seem so bad.
There you go.

You see? I mean,
it's not so terrible.

Yeah, as a matter of fact,
it's kind of a relief.

I was wrong, big deal.

That's the spirit.

Come on, everybody's wrong
now and then.

I've been wrong a ton
of times, doctor, and

if that's made your life
difficult, I do apologize.

Well, I, I, I,
I can't say it hasn't,

but I want you to know, Laverne,

I truly appreciate
all that you do for me.

Thank you, doctor.

Well, whoo-wee,
it's been quite a day.

I am plumb wore out.

We'd better get some rest

if we're gon' make
that seminar tomorrow.

Well, I don't know.

Maybe we don't have to go
to that seminar, Laverne.

I think we just had ours.

I think you're right.

Good night, doctor.
Good night, dear.

You know,
I was wrong another time.

I never should've bought
that gremlin hatchback.

You bought a gremlin hatchback?

Connie will be here any minute.

Time to go to Mexico.

Oh, he's really
going to take us.

Not us.

One of you should be enough
to bring your daddy's money.

- Come on, red.
- Me?

- Yeah, you.
- He's taking me, Barbara.

Well, wait a minute.
Are you crazy?

Don't take my sister. Take me.

You've never been
on a trip with her.

She's a whiner.
She gets carsick.

She has a real small bladder,

and you'll never get her
to eat at stuckey's!

Hey, I call the shots here.

I decide who to take.
Red's going.

You'd be too much trouble,
you're a cop.

Come on, red.

Oh, oh, oh, oh!
No, no, I can't go to Mexico!

All those tortillas and flan!

The choking smog in la zocalo.

Thanks for warning me.
I'll gag her in the car.

Oh, brilliant, Connie!

Honk, honk!

2:00 in the morning,
and she's honking the horn.

Okay, red, let's go.

All right, wait a minute!

Carol, you're not
going with him.

What?

Lou, the only way
you're leaving here is alone,

because nobody
is going with you.

What are you, crazy, lady?
I'm taking your sister hostage.

Carol, don't listen to him.
Just, just move away from him.

Barbara, but perhaps you've
forgotten about bang, bang.

Carol, trust me.

I know this guy's profile.

I know what he's about.
He's not going to shoot you.

Now, come over here.
I'm warning you.

Carol, don't listen to him!

Get over here!

All right, come on, Connie!

Why don't you flash
the lights, too?

Let's go, red. Carol, stay put.

He not going to shoot you.

He doesn't have it in him.
Are you sure, Barbara?

Yeah, are you sure, Barbara?

One hundred percent sure.

Carol, he's bluffing.
I'm not bluffing.

He says he's not bluffing.

- I'm cocking the gun.
- He's cocking the gun.

He's not going to do it, Carol.

- Don't make me do this.
- I think he's going to do it.

Carol, trust me.

Barbara, I told you I would
never ever trust you again,

but I've changed my mind.

I'm going with my sister.

All right,
you leave me no choice.

I'm leaving!

But it's my choice.

Wait!

Lou, before you go,
just one thing.

Yeah?

Which one of us is the looker?

You'll never know.

Car's all fixed, gassed up,
just like you asked... doctor.

Thanks. What's the best way
back to Miami?

Hey, just head out highway 81.

I know a quicker way.

Laverne, we're not taking
that back road again.

You just go up the road
about a mile,

you make a right
at the nuclear power plant.

Hey, there's that guy, look!

They caught
that escaped convict.

How do you feel about
being recaptured, Mr. ziddy?

Zinni! Lou zinni!

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