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1
00:00:00,818 --> 00:00:04,419
Life goes on, and so do we
2
00:00:04,455 --> 00:00:08,990
Just how we do it
is no mystery
3
00:00:09,026 --> 00:00:13,028
One by one we fill the days
4
00:00:13,063 --> 00:00:16,398
We find a thousand
different ways
5
00:00:17,701 --> 00:00:22,104
Sometimes the answer
can be hard to find
6
00:00:22,139 --> 00:00:24,673
That's something
I will never be
7
00:00:24,708 --> 00:00:29,811
I'm always here
for anything that you need
8
00:00:31,014 --> 00:00:35,217
Rain or shine,
I'll be the one
9
00:00:35,252 --> 00:00:39,020
To share it all
as life goes on
10
00:00:39,056 --> 00:00:43,258
We share it all
11
00:00:43,293 --> 00:00:46,495
as life goes on
12
00:01:04,436 --> 00:01:06,169
ah. Now, here's an evening
13
00:01:06,205 --> 00:01:08,638
of good family
entertainment, huh?
14
00:01:08,674 --> 00:01:11,241
The sound of music
is coming back to town!
15
00:01:11,276 --> 00:01:13,343
Forget that, daddy.
Look at this.
16
00:01:13,378 --> 00:01:16,641
Judgment on nuremberg on ice.
17
00:01:17,549 --> 00:01:21,318
Brian boitano as Ernst janning.
18
00:01:23,121 --> 00:01:24,354
You know, I shouldn't
really make any plans
19
00:01:24,389 --> 00:01:25,655
until I find out
about that new assignment
20
00:01:25,691 --> 00:01:26,756
I applied for.
21
00:01:26,792 --> 00:01:27,891
What new assignment?
22
00:01:27,926 --> 00:01:29,326
To be the police liaison
23
00:01:29,361 --> 00:01:31,828
to the mayor's commission
on women's issues.
24
00:01:31,863 --> 00:01:33,129
Wow, Barbara!
25
00:01:33,165 --> 00:01:34,731
That sounds like
a very prestigious job!
26
00:01:34,766 --> 00:01:37,467
It is, and, daddy, the word
is I'm the frontrunner.
27
00:01:37,502 --> 00:01:38,702
Not only am I a good cop,
28
00:01:38,737 --> 00:01:40,170
but I have seniority
and I'm practically
29
00:01:40,205 --> 00:01:41,972
the only eligible woman
in the department.
30
00:01:42,007 --> 00:01:44,307
So, daddy,
should I call ticketmaster?
31
00:01:44,343 --> 00:01:46,407
Hold off on that, dear.
32
00:01:48,141 --> 00:01:49,846
Oh, good. You're all here.
33
00:01:49,881 --> 00:01:51,748
Because the dietzter's got
something to show you.
34
00:01:51,783 --> 00:01:53,542
All: No!
35
00:01:55,420 --> 00:01:57,621
I'm gonna take that as a yes.
36
00:02:02,427 --> 00:02:04,828
Charley, you got a tattoo!
37
00:02:04,863 --> 00:02:06,997
How could you
desecrate your body that way?
38
00:02:07,032 --> 00:02:09,580
Easy. I was blotto.
39
00:02:10,269 --> 00:02:12,802
Plus, it was the only way
I could get this...
40
00:02:12,838 --> 00:02:15,371
"Pamela" babe into bed.
41
00:02:16,742 --> 00:02:18,208
Well, Charley,
I hope it was worth it.
42
00:02:18,243 --> 00:02:19,409
You're gonna have to live
with that tattoo
43
00:02:19,444 --> 00:02:20,577
for the rest of your life.
44
00:02:21,341 --> 00:02:22,679
What?
45
00:02:25,150 --> 00:02:27,450
Didn't they tell you that
when they gave it to you?
46
00:02:27,486 --> 00:02:29,052
It's all kinda blurry, Harry.
47
00:02:29,087 --> 00:02:31,459
I just remember vomiting a lot.
48
00:02:31,957 --> 00:02:34,391
Well, I'm done with breakfast.
49
00:02:39,775 --> 00:02:41,575
Frank? Laverne.
50
00:02:41,611 --> 00:02:43,077
Doctor needs his usual
51
00:02:43,112 --> 00:02:46,013
sorry-it-didn't-work-out-
between-us carnations.
52
00:02:47,216 --> 00:02:49,150
No, frank, I wouldn't say
his datin' life
53
00:02:49,185 --> 00:02:50,700
is in the toilet.
54
00:02:51,621 --> 00:02:52,893
I'd say it's...
55
00:02:53,256 --> 00:02:55,789
No, toilet
pretty much sums it up.
56
00:02:57,493 --> 00:02:59,393
All right, my dear. Bye-bye.
57
00:02:59,428 --> 00:03:01,243
Call me any time you need me.
58
00:03:01,864 --> 00:03:03,731
Okay, Laverne,
if that's it for the morning,
59
00:03:03,766 --> 00:03:05,432
I'm going to lunch.
60
00:03:05,468 --> 00:03:06,468
I'm sorry, doctor.
61
00:03:06,502 --> 00:03:08,469
We've had
an unscheduled walk-in.
62
00:03:08,504 --> 00:03:10,738
Famous child evangelist.
Room one.
63
00:03:12,108 --> 00:03:15,409
- Timmy Moses?
- Tiny Timmy Moses.
64
00:03:15,444 --> 00:03:18,112
The tiny Timmy Moses.
65
00:03:18,147 --> 00:03:19,747
He's big.
66
00:03:21,184 --> 00:03:23,450
He's told more people
they are goin' to hell
67
00:03:23,486 --> 00:03:24,485
than any other eight-year-old
68
00:03:24,520 --> 00:03:26,200
in America today.
69
00:03:27,377 --> 00:03:29,557
Really? What's his problem?
70
00:03:29,592 --> 00:03:31,692
Well, I guess they's
just too much sin in the world
71
00:03:31,727 --> 00:03:33,127
for his likin'.
72
00:03:34,197 --> 00:03:35,529
No, I mean, why is he here?
73
00:03:35,565 --> 00:03:37,231
- Oh, laryngitis.
- Thank you.
74
00:03:38,634 --> 00:03:42,670
Hi, Timmy. Mrs. Moses.
I'm Dr. Weston.
75
00:03:42,705 --> 00:03:45,472
Laverne tells me
you lost your voice, huh?
76
00:03:46,453 --> 00:03:48,442
Well, I guess it hurts
a little bit.
77
00:03:48,477 --> 00:03:49,677
Let me take a look in there.
78
00:03:49,712 --> 00:03:52,012
Can you open wide and say "ah"?
79
00:03:52,048 --> 00:03:54,882
Ah.
80
00:03:54,917 --> 00:03:57,618
Can you say "amen"?
81
00:03:57,653 --> 00:03:59,453
Amen.
82
00:03:59,488 --> 00:04:00,921
Oh.
83
00:04:00,957 --> 00:04:02,723
You know, just open wide
and don't say anything.
84
00:04:02,758 --> 00:04:04,158
Let me take
a little look, all right?
85
00:04:04,193 --> 00:04:06,026
Let me see. Let me see.
86
00:04:06,062 --> 00:04:07,328
Ah.
87
00:04:07,363 --> 00:04:09,830
Well, I don't see
any signs of infection.
88
00:04:09,865 --> 00:04:11,094
You know what I think?
89
00:04:11,353 --> 00:04:13,107
I think you've just
overused your voice.
90
00:04:13,142 --> 00:04:15,142
So, this is what
you're gonna have to do here.
91
00:04:15,178 --> 00:04:17,444
You just gargle
with some warm salt water,
92
00:04:17,480 --> 00:04:18,445
and no preaching.
93
00:04:18,481 --> 00:04:19,680
For a little while anyway.
94
00:04:19,715 --> 00:04:21,749
For how long, Dr. Weston?
95
00:04:21,784 --> 00:04:23,150
Timmy has
a very important revival
96
00:04:23,186 --> 00:04:24,318
on the 18th.
97
00:04:24,353 --> 00:04:27,432
He's headlining
in the main tent.
98
00:04:27,857 --> 00:04:30,057
Ooh, well don't worry.
99
00:04:30,092 --> 00:04:31,258
If you follow my advice,
100
00:04:31,294 --> 00:04:32,660
he's gonna be
all better by then.
101
00:04:32,702 --> 00:04:35,169
Thank you, doctor.
Timmy'll say a prayer for ya.
102
00:04:35,198 --> 00:04:37,257
Thank you. A silent one.
103
00:04:37,829 --> 00:04:39,867
Bye-bye, dear. You call
me in a couple of days.
104
00:04:39,902 --> 00:04:41,802
Oh, yes, I will.
105
00:04:41,837 --> 00:04:43,404
All right, Laverne.
106
00:04:43,439 --> 00:04:47,041
Dr. Weston is now...
Going to lunch.
107
00:04:47,076 --> 00:04:48,842
Uh, wait, doctor, um...
108
00:04:48,878 --> 00:04:50,844
We need to have a talk.
109
00:04:50,880 --> 00:04:52,413
Oh. What is it?
110
00:04:52,448 --> 00:04:54,515
Well, it's about
the wretched damn mess
111
00:04:54,550 --> 00:04:56,234
you have made of your love life.
112
00:04:58,988 --> 00:05:00,788
I beg your pardon?
113
00:05:00,823 --> 00:05:02,790
It's about the wretched
damn mess you have made...
114
00:05:02,825 --> 00:05:05,292
Laverne, I heard what you said.
115
00:05:05,328 --> 00:05:07,995
Well, the truth is
I feel sort of guilty.
116
00:05:08,030 --> 00:05:09,263
For 2 1/2 years
117
00:05:09,298 --> 00:05:10,664
I've been sitting
here on my duff
118
00:05:10,700 --> 00:05:11,966
while you have wallowed in a sea
119
00:05:12,001 --> 00:05:14,368
of datin' ineptitude.
120
00:05:14,403 --> 00:05:16,237
What are you talking about?
121
00:05:16,272 --> 00:05:18,172
Doctor, you are lookin'
at a matchmaker
122
00:05:18,207 --> 00:05:19,740
with a perfect record!
123
00:05:19,775 --> 00:05:21,075
Oh, I see.
124
00:05:21,110 --> 00:05:22,309
No, thank you.
I appreciate the thought.
125
00:05:22,345 --> 00:05:23,644
Not necessary.
126
00:05:23,679 --> 00:05:26,380
Okay, now, I need to ask
you a few questions here.
127
00:05:28,284 --> 00:05:31,318
What is your favorite
form of precipitation?
128
00:05:31,354 --> 00:05:32,920
Hail.
129
00:05:32,955 --> 00:05:34,401
Uh-huh.
130
00:05:36,199 --> 00:05:39,134
Free associate
with the word "mule."
131
00:05:39,169 --> 00:05:41,664
- Laverne...
- I resent that.
132
00:05:42,205 --> 00:05:44,296
No, no, no, no. I'm...
133
00:05:45,070 --> 00:05:46,441
Donald o'Connor.
134
00:05:46,476 --> 00:05:47,876
That's better.
135
00:05:47,911 --> 00:05:50,478
Now, we need to be
scientific here.
136
00:05:50,514 --> 00:05:52,480
If a Wolverine
was a-chasin' you,
137
00:05:52,516 --> 00:05:54,680
would you tend
to run east or west?
138
00:05:55,919 --> 00:05:58,153
Laverne, please,
no more questions.
139
00:05:58,188 --> 00:06:00,182
I am going to lunch!
I have a date!
140
00:06:00,457 --> 00:06:02,524
Now you can see
I am perfectly capable
141
00:06:02,559 --> 00:06:04,926
of finding a suitable woman.
142
00:06:04,961 --> 00:06:07,095
That reminds me,
that suitable woman
143
00:06:07,130 --> 00:06:08,429
just phoned and canceled.
144
00:06:08,465 --> 00:06:10,365
She claims she has five separate
145
00:06:10,400 --> 00:06:11,833
and distinct personalities
146
00:06:11,868 --> 00:06:14,235
and four of them hate your guts.
147
00:06:21,111 --> 00:06:22,810
Anne, I'm so glad
you introduced yourself
148
00:06:22,846 --> 00:06:23,978
to me today.
149
00:06:24,014 --> 00:06:25,113
Well, I've wanted to
for a while,
150
00:06:25,148 --> 00:06:26,347
but I'm still pretty new
on the force,
151
00:06:26,383 --> 00:06:27,515
and I figured,
152
00:06:27,551 --> 00:06:29,150
anyone with
your personality and looks
153
00:06:29,186 --> 00:06:30,952
must have more friends
than she knows what to do with.
154
00:06:30,987 --> 00:06:33,154
Well, you can never have
too many friends.
155
00:06:34,135 --> 00:06:36,491
Thought I'd heard
someone down here.
156
00:06:36,526 --> 00:06:38,126
Barbie Barb, aren't you going
157
00:06:38,161 --> 00:06:40,350
to introduce me
to your little playmate?
158
00:06:41,998 --> 00:06:43,665
This is my sister Carol.
159
00:06:43,700 --> 00:06:45,800
Hi, I'm Anne Caldwell.
Barbara and I work together.
160
00:06:45,835 --> 00:06:47,101
Oh, really? That's odd.
161
00:06:47,137 --> 00:06:48,203
I thought I knew
all Barbara's friends
162
00:06:48,238 --> 00:06:49,204
on the force.
163
00:06:49,239 --> 00:06:50,205
Come on, Anne.
164
00:06:50,240 --> 00:06:51,272
I'll show you the rest
165
00:06:51,308 --> 00:06:52,674
of my back-scratcher collection.
166
00:06:52,709 --> 00:06:54,075
It's such an unusual
thing to collect, Barbara.
167
00:06:54,110 --> 00:06:55,877
You really are an original.
168
00:06:55,912 --> 00:06:57,979
Lucky Barbara.
169
00:06:58,014 --> 00:07:00,515
She found a new friend.
170
00:07:03,253 --> 00:07:05,787
But I've always got you,
dreyfuss.
171
00:07:05,822 --> 00:07:08,989
Let me tell you about my day.
172
00:07:17,469 --> 00:07:19,603
And this one I got in Chinatown
173
00:07:19,638 --> 00:07:20,871
on my trip to New York.
174
00:07:20,906 --> 00:07:23,407
- Cute!
- Oh, this one is so cool.
175
00:07:23,442 --> 00:07:24,841
It's musical.
176
00:07:24,877 --> 00:07:28,545
You wind it up and it plays
my boyfriend's back.
177
00:07:28,581 --> 00:07:30,411
Oh.
178
00:07:31,350 --> 00:07:34,084
What an incredible collection.
179
00:07:34,119 --> 00:07:35,485
This is so much fun, Barbara.
180
00:07:35,521 --> 00:07:37,754
We really should get
together more often.
181
00:07:37,790 --> 00:07:39,856
But you probably
won't have a lot of time
182
00:07:39,892 --> 00:07:41,225
for the little people like me
183
00:07:41,260 --> 00:07:43,193
once you get that job
on the mayor's commission.
184
00:07:43,229 --> 00:07:44,795
Of course I will.
185
00:07:44,830 --> 00:07:45,896
If I get it.
186
00:07:45,931 --> 00:07:47,497
This one is all the way
from Canada.
187
00:07:47,533 --> 00:07:49,199
Oh, but you're gonna
get the job.
188
00:07:49,235 --> 00:07:50,500
Everybody knows that.
189
00:07:50,536 --> 00:07:52,336
You're obviously
the most qualified.
190
00:07:52,371 --> 00:07:53,537
No one else even comes close.
191
00:07:53,572 --> 00:07:54,705
Well...
192
00:07:54,740 --> 00:07:56,373
so, have you thought about
193
00:07:56,408 --> 00:07:57,975
what you'd like to accomplish
on the commission?
194
00:07:58,010 --> 00:07:59,476
Oh, yeah.
195
00:07:59,511 --> 00:08:01,478
You see, I think
it's time we realized
196
00:08:01,513 --> 00:08:03,713
that women's issues
are really people issues.
197
00:08:03,748 --> 00:08:04,881
Like daycare.
198
00:08:04,916 --> 00:08:07,784
I, uh... I thought
Anne might like a snack.
199
00:08:07,819 --> 00:08:09,285
Thank you!
200
00:08:09,321 --> 00:08:11,821
So, Barbara,
who actually decides
201
00:08:11,857 --> 00:08:13,256
who gets this position?
202
00:08:13,291 --> 00:08:14,424
One of the mayor's assistants
203
00:08:14,459 --> 00:08:15,525
interviews everybody next week
204
00:08:15,560 --> 00:08:16,826
and then he decides.
205
00:08:16,862 --> 00:08:19,395
Hmm. And this assistant,
have you scoped him out?
206
00:08:19,431 --> 00:08:20,497
Do you know what he's like?
207
00:08:20,532 --> 00:08:21,498
Yeah, I've heard
a lot about him.
208
00:08:21,533 --> 00:08:23,099
I know his name
is Jerry hartman.
209
00:08:23,135 --> 00:08:24,968
Hmm. Married? Single?
210
00:08:25,003 --> 00:08:27,003
Married. And I think
his wife is in...
211
00:08:27,038 --> 00:08:29,072
Barbara, Barbara,
how you do go on.
212
00:08:29,107 --> 00:08:30,874
I'm sure you're boring
Anne silly.
213
00:08:30,909 --> 00:08:32,337
Not at all.
214
00:08:33,345 --> 00:08:34,911
You know, Barbara,
215
00:08:34,946 --> 00:08:36,279
I wish I had
your self-confidence.
216
00:08:36,314 --> 00:08:37,647
I would be afraid to even apply
217
00:08:37,682 --> 00:08:38,781
for a job like that.
218
00:08:38,817 --> 00:08:40,517
They'd probably laugh me
off the force.
219
00:08:40,552 --> 00:08:42,018
Come on. From what I've heard,
220
00:08:42,053 --> 00:08:43,520
you've come up
through the ranks really fast.
221
00:08:43,555 --> 00:08:45,121
So you must be
pretty good at what you do.
222
00:08:45,157 --> 00:08:46,410
I'll say.
223
00:08:48,627 --> 00:08:50,426
Well, I really should be going.
224
00:08:50,462 --> 00:08:52,829
I'll see you tomorrow, okay?
225
00:08:52,864 --> 00:08:54,164
Okay.
226
00:08:54,199 --> 00:08:55,761
- Bye.
- Bye.
227
00:08:56,718 --> 00:08:58,951
My god, Barbara!
What is wrong with you?
228
00:08:58,987 --> 00:09:00,153
What did I do?
229
00:09:00,188 --> 00:09:01,821
Don't you recognize
a manipulator
230
00:09:01,856 --> 00:09:02,856
when you see one?
231
00:09:02,891 --> 00:09:04,057
Have you learned nothing at all
232
00:09:04,092 --> 00:09:06,590
in your 28 years as my sister?
233
00:09:07,328 --> 00:09:09,195
What are you talking about?
234
00:09:09,230 --> 00:09:10,830
I am talking about the way
235
00:09:10,865 --> 00:09:12,265
that Anne was working you.
236
00:09:12,300 --> 00:09:14,467
It's obvious she is after
the same position you are.
237
00:09:14,502 --> 00:09:16,035
Carol, that is ridiculous!
238
00:09:16,071 --> 00:09:17,796
Barbara, wake up!
239
00:09:18,752 --> 00:09:21,219
Didn't you see
the way she was pumping you
240
00:09:21,255 --> 00:09:22,637
for information?
241
00:09:22,670 --> 00:09:24,122
You don't think
she really came here
242
00:09:24,158 --> 00:09:26,692
to see your stupid
backscratchers.
243
00:09:32,444 --> 00:09:36,179
Damn it! I can't
believe how stupid I am!
244
00:09:36,214 --> 00:09:37,214
Let me guess.
245
00:09:37,248 --> 00:09:38,680
Might this have something to do
246
00:09:38,709 --> 00:09:40,442
with our new best friend Anne?
247
00:09:40,485 --> 00:09:41,551
Can you believe it?
248
00:09:41,586 --> 00:09:44,009
Not only did she apply
for the job,
249
00:09:44,037 --> 00:09:46,687
but she got past
the initial interview.
250
00:09:46,721 --> 00:09:48,900
She's been on the force
for seven months!
251
00:09:48,939 --> 00:09:50,449
Do you know
where she is right now?
252
00:09:50,477 --> 00:09:51,677
Having dinner with the man
253
00:09:51,712 --> 00:09:53,011
who makes the final decision?
254
00:09:53,047 --> 00:09:55,180
No. That's tomorrow night.
255
00:09:57,483 --> 00:09:59,716
Tonight she's going
shopping with his wife.
256
00:09:59,751 --> 00:10:02,135
Uh, she's good.
257
00:10:02,521 --> 00:10:05,489
For six years I have
busted my butt on the force
258
00:10:05,524 --> 00:10:07,357
and this suck-up
comes out of nowhere,
259
00:10:07,392 --> 00:10:08,625
picks my brain
260
00:10:08,660 --> 00:10:10,760
and now has a good chance
of getting my job!
261
00:10:10,796 --> 00:10:13,949
Oh, poor, sweet, naive Barbara.
262
00:10:14,933 --> 00:10:16,867
You thought you could get ahead
263
00:10:16,902 --> 00:10:18,568
by hard work and dedication.
264
00:10:18,604 --> 00:10:20,003
Yeah, well.
265
00:10:20,038 --> 00:10:21,938
I'll beat her at her own game.
266
00:10:21,974 --> 00:10:24,107
It takes being a snake
to get ahead?
267
00:10:24,143 --> 00:10:26,676
I can crawl on my belly
with the lowest of them.
268
00:10:28,579 --> 00:10:30,154
Carol, teach me how.
269
00:10:34,620 --> 00:10:35,919
Sister!
270
00:10:43,754 --> 00:10:45,253
Stick with me,
Barbara, you'll have
271
00:10:45,289 --> 00:10:47,989
your phd. In manipulation
in no time.
272
00:10:48,025 --> 00:10:50,025
Now, we've covered
pouting, whining,
273
00:10:50,068 --> 00:10:52,035
the fine art of acting helpless.
274
00:10:52,062 --> 00:10:53,328
Uh, Barbara,
you should really put
275
00:10:53,371 --> 00:10:55,004
those groceries away
before the ice-cream melts.
276
00:10:55,048 --> 00:10:56,113
I'd do it myself, but.
277
00:10:56,149 --> 00:10:57,582
I know. Your tennis elbow.
278
00:10:57,617 --> 00:11:01,922
Now Carol, do you really think
this manipulation stuff works?
279
00:11:01,961 --> 00:11:05,095
Why do you think you're
putting away the groceries?
280
00:11:06,766 --> 00:11:10,423
Wow! You're like
a real master at this!
281
00:11:11,437 --> 00:11:13,604
This is like in that movie
the karate kid.
282
00:11:13,639 --> 00:11:14,805
You know, where the real old guy
283
00:11:14,840 --> 00:11:16,807
teaches the cute
young kid all those tricks?
284
00:11:19,745 --> 00:11:22,374
Wax on. Wax off.
285
00:11:22,681 --> 00:11:23,967
Wax... Barbara!
286
00:11:24,952 --> 00:11:26,452
Now, you're going to be working
287
00:11:26,487 --> 00:11:28,688
at a disadvantage
because you've already blabbed
288
00:11:28,723 --> 00:11:29,889
so much to Anne.
289
00:11:29,924 --> 00:11:31,357
So, what else do you know
about the guy
290
00:11:31,392 --> 00:11:32,958
making the final decision?
291
00:11:32,994 --> 00:11:35,027
Well, he went to school
at Indiana.
292
00:11:35,063 --> 00:11:36,429
Perfect!
Pretend you're a big fan.
293
00:11:36,464 --> 00:11:37,963
I can do that!
294
00:11:37,999 --> 00:11:39,498
"How about those hoosiers?"
295
00:11:39,534 --> 00:11:41,333
Great. Now, what else?
296
00:11:41,369 --> 00:11:42,902
- He's on a diet.
- Excellent.
297
00:11:42,937 --> 00:11:44,070
You're gonna want your meeting
298
00:11:44,105 --> 00:11:45,671
to be the first one after lunch,
299
00:11:45,707 --> 00:11:48,009
while he's still
in the Rosie afterglow of food.
300
00:11:48,476 --> 00:11:50,743
I can't do it.
They want me there at 4:00.
301
00:11:50,778 --> 00:11:52,111
Well, call his secretary
302
00:11:52,146 --> 00:11:53,612
and tell her to change
the meeting to 1:00.
303
00:11:53,648 --> 00:11:54,714
I don't know.
304
00:11:54,749 --> 00:11:55,781
Why don't you tell them
305
00:11:55,817 --> 00:11:56,916
that it conflicts
306
00:11:56,951 --> 00:11:58,918
with your volunteer work
at the orphans home?
307
00:11:58,953 --> 00:12:01,215
Come on, Carol!
Nobody buys that stuff!
308
00:12:01,255 --> 00:12:02,521
Oh, no?
309
00:12:02,557 --> 00:12:04,323
And how do you think
I got out of doing the dishes
310
00:12:04,358 --> 00:12:06,459
every Sunday dinner?
311
00:12:06,494 --> 00:12:07,526
But it's different.
312
00:12:07,562 --> 00:12:09,095
You had choir practice down at...
313
00:12:11,032 --> 00:12:13,203
- Not fair!
- Yes!
314
00:12:17,505 --> 00:12:20,072
Anyway, lurlene, doctor is out
315
00:12:20,108 --> 00:12:22,608
on a lunch date
with his "perfect soul mate"
316
00:12:22,643 --> 00:12:24,509
thanks to my match-makin'.
317
00:12:25,246 --> 00:12:27,279
Well, of course I swung
the rock counter-clockwise.
318
00:12:27,315 --> 00:12:29,352
I'm a professional.
319
00:12:30,595 --> 00:12:32,184
Oh, here come
the love birds now.
320
00:12:32,220 --> 00:12:33,352
I've gotta go.
321
00:12:34,822 --> 00:12:36,589
- Both: Oh!
- Excuse me. Sorry again.
322
00:12:36,624 --> 00:12:37,690
Sorry.
323
00:12:41,095 --> 00:12:42,962
Oh, please, go on...
324
00:12:46,768 --> 00:12:48,601
Well, it's been great,
hasn't it?
325
00:12:48,636 --> 00:12:50,302
Great.
326
00:12:50,338 --> 00:12:51,707
Both: Well...
327
00:12:52,673 --> 00:12:54,206
all right. Bye-bye
328
00:12:54,242 --> 00:12:56,445
oh... This is something...
329
00:12:56,469 --> 00:12:58,102
Sorry.
330
00:12:58,137 --> 00:12:59,436
Thank you.
331
00:13:02,933 --> 00:13:04,308
Oh.
332
00:13:04,348 --> 00:13:05,608
Well...
333
00:13:06,159 --> 00:13:09,014
That was painful to watch.
334
00:13:11,210 --> 00:13:12,176
I don't know.
335
00:13:12,211 --> 00:13:13,777
I have been match-makin'
all my life
336
00:13:13,813 --> 00:13:15,412
and nothin' like that
has ever happened.
337
00:13:15,448 --> 00:13:17,448
What a disaster.
338
00:13:17,483 --> 00:13:18,682
I stood, she sat.
339
00:13:18,718 --> 00:13:20,351
I turned left, she turned right!
340
00:13:20,386 --> 00:13:22,233
I'm black and blue!
341
00:13:23,289 --> 00:13:24,889
Could've been
such a wonderful date too.
342
00:13:24,924 --> 00:13:26,724
And it was raining out.
I love the rain.
343
00:13:26,759 --> 00:13:27,858
It's so romantic.
344
00:13:27,894 --> 00:13:29,627
You love the rain?
345
00:13:29,662 --> 00:13:32,335
Well, where do you stand
on the hail?
346
00:13:34,200 --> 00:13:35,599
I can take it or leave it!
347
00:13:35,635 --> 00:13:38,569
Well, just wait a minute
here, buster doctor.
348
00:13:40,039 --> 00:13:41,438
When I asked you the other day,
349
00:13:41,474 --> 00:13:43,607
you told me that hail
was your favorite form
350
00:13:43,643 --> 00:13:44,675
of precipitation.
351
00:13:44,710 --> 00:13:46,110
I wasn't paying attention!
352
00:13:46,145 --> 00:13:48,412
I just said something
that came out of my face!
353
00:13:49,910 --> 00:13:51,682
Well, a little thing
like that can throw
354
00:13:51,717 --> 00:13:52,983
the whole formula off!
355
00:13:53,019 --> 00:13:55,519
Now I've gotta
recalculate everything!
356
00:13:55,555 --> 00:13:56,654
Please...
357
00:13:56,689 --> 00:13:58,222
Don't bother, please!
358
00:13:59,759 --> 00:14:01,427
Doctor's office.
359
00:14:01,861 --> 00:14:04,528
Oh, hi, Mrs. Moses. How's Timmy?
360
00:14:04,564 --> 00:14:05,763
Oh.
361
00:14:05,798 --> 00:14:07,565
Oh, seems Timmy has suffered
362
00:14:07,600 --> 00:14:09,800
a terrible setback
vocal cord-wise.
363
00:14:09,835 --> 00:14:11,201
He watched some blasphemers
364
00:14:11,237 --> 00:14:12,803
on Geraldo.
365
00:14:12,838 --> 00:14:15,506
Well, tell him to gargle
and watch something else.
366
00:14:15,541 --> 00:14:16,707
Who's on Oprah?
367
00:14:16,742 --> 00:14:19,149
Wife-swappin' bigamists.
368
00:14:21,147 --> 00:14:22,580
Well, tell him "forget TV"
369
00:14:22,615 --> 00:14:24,055
and ask him if he wants
three tickets
370
00:14:24,083 --> 00:14:26,118
to judgment on nuremberg on ice.
371
00:14:27,153 --> 00:14:29,896
Ooh, with Brian boitano?
372
00:14:40,453 --> 00:14:41,731
Hi, I'm Barbara Weston.
373
00:14:41,766 --> 00:14:43,399
Mr. hartman will be
with you in a moment.
374
00:14:43,435 --> 00:14:45,368
He's in with
another interview right now.
375
00:14:45,403 --> 00:14:46,402
Oh, I thought I was gonna be
376
00:14:46,438 --> 00:14:47,937
the first appointment
after lunch.
377
00:14:47,973 --> 00:14:49,372
You were,
but the other candidate
378
00:14:49,407 --> 00:14:50,373
needed to reschedule
379
00:14:50,408 --> 00:14:51,708
so she could donate blood
380
00:14:51,743 --> 00:14:53,877
for the Lithuanian
flood victims.
381
00:14:56,648 --> 00:14:59,182
Thanks again
for your time, Jerry.
382
00:14:59,217 --> 00:15:00,350
And thank you for sharing ideas
383
00:15:00,385 --> 00:15:01,385
on daycare with me.
384
00:15:01,419 --> 00:15:02,719
Well, like I said.
385
00:15:02,754 --> 00:15:04,187
I think it's time we realized
386
00:15:04,222 --> 00:15:06,723
that women's issues
are really people's issues.
387
00:15:08,093 --> 00:15:11,060
Barbara!
Don't you look sharp today?
388
00:15:11,096 --> 00:15:12,295
Hi, Anne.
389
00:15:12,330 --> 00:15:13,763
Well, see you soon, Jerry.
390
00:15:13,798 --> 00:15:15,398
And give my best
to Linda and the boys.
391
00:15:15,433 --> 00:15:16,900
Will do.
392
00:15:16,935 --> 00:15:18,234
Good luck.
393
00:15:19,404 --> 00:15:21,004
You must be Barbara Watkins.
394
00:15:21,039 --> 00:15:23,039
- Weston.
- Weston.
395
00:15:23,074 --> 00:15:24,674
So I see you went
to school in Indiana.
396
00:15:24,709 --> 00:15:26,543
- Yeah.
- How about those hoosiers?
397
00:15:26,578 --> 00:15:28,244
- Are you an Indiana fan?
- Are you kidding?
398
00:15:28,280 --> 00:15:30,213
I think Bobby knight
is the best basketball coach
399
00:15:30,248 --> 00:15:31,481
that ever lived!
400
00:15:31,516 --> 00:15:34,050
Come on. Did you see
that Kentucky game?
401
00:15:34,085 --> 00:15:36,088
Unbelievable!
402
00:15:42,294 --> 00:15:43,626
Hey, Harry.
403
00:15:43,662 --> 00:15:47,163
I would like you
to meet my fiancee Pamela.
404
00:15:49,734 --> 00:15:52,101
The woman who will be by my side
405
00:15:52,137 --> 00:15:54,305
for the rest of my life.
406
00:15:55,040 --> 00:15:56,664
Wanna get me a beer?
407
00:15:56,875 --> 00:15:58,796
Well, it's a great pleasure.
408
00:16:00,144 --> 00:16:02,312
Charley, you're getting married?
409
00:16:02,347 --> 00:16:04,380
Sometimes, fate steps in
410
00:16:04,416 --> 00:16:05,848
and makes your choices for you.
411
00:16:05,884 --> 00:16:07,016
You know, it's funny.
412
00:16:07,052 --> 00:16:08,651
A couple of days ago,
I though this tattoo
413
00:16:08,687 --> 00:16:09,919
was gonna work against me.
414
00:16:09,955 --> 00:16:11,628
Wait a minute. Charley. Charley.
415
00:16:11,892 --> 00:16:13,558
You're gonna marry this woman
because you have
416
00:16:13,594 --> 00:16:15,794
her name tattooed on your arm?
417
00:16:15,829 --> 00:16:17,098
Yeah.
418
00:16:19,553 --> 00:16:21,933
Anyway, I promised her
the whole ball of wax, you know.
419
00:16:21,969 --> 00:16:24,336
The house in the suburbs,
the white-picket fence.
420
00:16:24,371 --> 00:16:25,871
The station wagon, the kids.
421
00:16:25,906 --> 00:16:27,339
It's the American dream, Harry!
422
00:16:27,374 --> 00:16:28,807
And it's coming true
423
00:16:28,842 --> 00:16:31,775
for the future
Mr. and Mrs. Charley dietz.
424
00:16:32,742 --> 00:16:35,569
This is weird, but I guess...
425
00:16:35,611 --> 00:16:37,176
Congratulations are in order.
426
00:16:37,220 --> 00:16:39,086
- Thanks, Harry.
- Sure thing.
427
00:16:39,122 --> 00:16:41,431
And to think
I owe it all to this baby.
428
00:16:41,657 --> 00:16:43,904
Hey, look. It's fading.
429
00:16:44,961 --> 00:16:46,327
Well, maybe the guy
didn't have enough ink
430
00:16:46,362 --> 00:16:47,461
in his needle.
431
00:16:47,497 --> 00:16:49,211
What needle?
432
00:16:50,284 --> 00:16:52,317
The needle he used
when he gave you the tattoo.
433
00:16:52,352 --> 00:16:54,202
Uh, I hate needles.
434
00:16:54,555 --> 00:16:56,755
This baby's pure magic marker.
435
00:16:59,671 --> 00:17:01,109
Charley, all you have to do
to get rid of that
436
00:17:01,160 --> 00:17:02,760
is just scrub it off.
437
00:17:02,796 --> 00:17:04,062
You mean I don't have
to live with this
438
00:17:04,098 --> 00:17:05,559
for the rest of my life?
439
00:17:05,599 --> 00:17:06,665
Right.
440
00:17:07,594 --> 00:17:08,861
Or this?
441
00:17:11,865 --> 00:17:13,784
Pam, scram.
442
00:17:21,441 --> 00:17:22,840
Good-bye.
443
00:17:34,521 --> 00:17:35,678
Whoo!
444
00:17:36,656 --> 00:17:38,189
Good thing
we didn't get married.
445
00:17:38,224 --> 00:17:39,791
She's got a temper.
446
00:17:51,571 --> 00:17:53,037
Not what you think.
447
00:17:55,275 --> 00:17:56,741
Hi.
448
00:17:56,776 --> 00:17:59,187
Hi, sweetheart.
Did you get the job?
449
00:17:59,227 --> 00:18:01,710
No, they gave it
to Anne Caldwell instead.
450
00:18:01,758 --> 00:18:03,525
What about
all those things we rehearsed?
451
00:18:03,560 --> 00:18:05,527
What about those hoosiers?
452
00:18:05,562 --> 00:18:07,796
Carol, I tried to do that stuff,
453
00:18:07,831 --> 00:18:09,681
but I just couldn't
go through with it.
454
00:18:10,067 --> 00:18:11,067
Did learn something
455
00:18:11,101 --> 00:18:12,767
pretty important
about life, though.
456
00:18:12,803 --> 00:18:14,336
You know what you become
when you start
457
00:18:14,371 --> 00:18:15,995
kissing butt like that?
458
00:18:16,573 --> 00:18:18,239
A butt kisser!
459
00:18:21,445 --> 00:18:24,296
Oh, Barbara Weston
is no butt kisser.
460
00:18:24,335 --> 00:18:25,580
If I get ahead, it's gonna be
461
00:18:25,616 --> 00:18:27,637
on my own honest terms.
462
00:18:28,585 --> 00:18:30,018
I can't believe
someone like Anne
463
00:18:30,053 --> 00:18:31,519
is gonna be so successful.
464
00:18:31,555 --> 00:18:33,588
Oh, honey. Come here.
465
00:18:33,624 --> 00:18:36,057
I'm still real proud
of you, you know?
466
00:18:36,093 --> 00:18:37,425
C'mon, you remained
true to yourself,
467
00:18:37,461 --> 00:18:38,526
showed a lot of integrity
468
00:18:38,562 --> 00:18:40,362
and if this Anne person
could get ahead
469
00:18:40,397 --> 00:18:42,998
on her own ability,
she wouldn't have to kiss...
470
00:18:43,033 --> 00:18:44,319
Stuff.
471
00:18:44,801 --> 00:18:47,569
Daddy, Barbara
is not the only one
472
00:18:47,604 --> 00:18:50,739
who's... Who's suffered
a terrible blow today.
473
00:18:52,743 --> 00:18:56,044
I taught her how to be
manipulative and she failed.
474
00:18:56,079 --> 00:18:59,047
What does that say
about me, daddy?
475
00:18:59,082 --> 00:19:01,282
Honey, don't take it
so personally.
476
00:19:01,318 --> 00:19:03,752
Carol, you're
a wonderful suck-up.
477
00:19:13,230 --> 00:19:15,063
This is not fair.
478
00:19:15,098 --> 00:19:16,498
Not only does she take my job
479
00:19:16,533 --> 00:19:18,333
but I have to watch her
move into her new office.
480
00:19:18,380 --> 00:19:20,213
Should've been my office.
481
00:19:20,248 --> 00:19:22,882
Those should've been
my filing cabinets.
482
00:19:22,918 --> 00:19:24,818
My chair.
483
00:19:24,853 --> 00:19:26,534
My plant.
484
00:19:27,623 --> 00:19:30,223
My... Thingamajig
you put on the desk
485
00:19:30,258 --> 00:19:32,225
so when you write
it doesn't hurt the finish.
486
00:19:34,062 --> 00:19:35,695
- Anne.
- Jerry, hi!
487
00:19:35,731 --> 00:19:37,564
- Hey, great tie.
- Yeah.
488
00:19:37,599 --> 00:19:39,132
Anne, where is
the daycare report?
489
00:19:39,167 --> 00:19:40,967
You promised me
I'd have it by this morning!
490
00:19:41,003 --> 00:19:43,336
Let's talk about that
in my office, shall we?
491
00:19:46,441 --> 00:19:48,141
Now, my butt's on the line here!
492
00:19:48,176 --> 00:19:50,777
Maybe Anne can kiss it
and make it better.
493
00:19:52,581 --> 00:19:53,680
Jerry, I don't know
494
00:19:53,715 --> 00:19:55,015
what's wrong with me lately!
495
00:19:55,050 --> 00:19:56,483
I...I think I might be
coming down with something.
496
00:19:56,518 --> 00:19:57,751
And I'm under so much stress!
497
00:19:57,786 --> 00:19:59,319
Well, I don't wanna hear it!
498
00:19:59,354 --> 00:20:01,641
I just want that report
by the end of the day!
499
00:20:07,736 --> 00:20:09,269
Boy, I really blew it this time.
500
00:20:11,106 --> 00:20:12,839
You must hate me.
501
00:20:12,874 --> 00:20:15,375
I don't blame you.
I'm such a screw-up!
502
00:20:15,410 --> 00:20:17,810
Well, we all make mistakes.
503
00:20:18,910 --> 00:20:21,147
I'd really like
to be friends again.
504
00:20:23,051 --> 00:20:24,083
I don't know.
505
00:20:25,153 --> 00:20:26,119
Oh, god!
506
00:20:26,154 --> 00:20:27,287
I don't know how I can write
507
00:20:27,322 --> 00:20:29,489
this report when I'm this upset!
508
00:20:29,524 --> 00:20:31,124
You're so smart, Barbara.
509
00:20:31,159 --> 00:20:32,759
I bet you could do it
in a minute.
510
00:20:33,244 --> 00:20:34,894
You're right!
511
00:20:34,930 --> 00:20:36,075
I could!
512
00:20:38,010 --> 00:20:39,378
Bye.
513
00:20:48,516 --> 00:20:49,748
Okay.
514
00:20:49,784 --> 00:20:52,351
I have found your perfect
and revised soul mate.
515
00:20:52,386 --> 00:20:54,320
Stop, Laverne,
with the match-making.
516
00:20:54,355 --> 00:20:55,495
Come on.
517
00:20:55,656 --> 00:20:57,623
Oh, hi, Timmy! How you doing?
518
00:20:57,658 --> 00:20:59,325
His voice is back, doctor.
519
00:20:59,360 --> 00:21:00,893
Just in time
for the revival meeting.
520
00:21:00,928 --> 00:21:03,729
Oh, that's great news!
I'm so glad to hear it.
521
00:21:03,764 --> 00:21:05,397
I mean, I knew that...
okay, Laverne.
522
00:21:05,433 --> 00:21:08,501
Where's that perfect man
you've been telling me about?
523
00:21:13,295 --> 00:21:15,057
Hi, I'm Harry.
524
00:21:16,043 --> 00:21:17,477
Michelle.
525
00:21:31,392 --> 00:21:33,126
Michelle.
526
00:21:33,828 --> 00:21:35,928
That's a beautiful name.
527
00:21:35,963 --> 00:21:38,297
Oh. Thank you.
528
00:21:38,332 --> 00:21:40,499
Would you like to...
529
00:21:40,535 --> 00:21:42,001
yes.
530
00:21:42,036 --> 00:21:43,269
Fornicator!
531
00:21:43,304 --> 00:21:45,037
What? Who...
532
00:21:45,072 --> 00:21:47,673
- Fornicator!
- Wait. Wait a minute.
533
00:21:47,708 --> 00:21:49,708
- Just a minute.
- Fornicator!
534
00:21:49,744 --> 00:21:51,911
Wait! You...
535
00:21:51,961 --> 00:21:56,511
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