Original subtitles

Oh, man!

This stinks - shitty job.

Any plans for this weekend?

The game on Saturday

Oh, something new.

What? You want to come?

Oh, no. Soccer? No way.

Sometimes I wonder what you do when you're off.

Sunday I'm taking a spin

The new turbo's in

What does your fiance say?

Uschi-bear?

I never talk cars with her

Sure. I understand.

Clean that off!

You bet. Right away.

Police!

Don't move.

More police!

Turn off that crap.

Hands up in the air. Come on, get out.

Hands on there.

Damned

You can start the reports.

We get the best part again Thanks.

Is that her?

Yes, that's her.

She's srewing the captain?

And has a relative in the city hall.

Hello.

Hello.

You saw what happened. Distract and bust.

Ah, I'm astounded.

Can't say we share our know-how

Sh-t, sh-t, sh-t...

REGULAR GUYS

You guys sure showed that babe.

I got something to show her.

If she ever sees it...

Hey, it's too big to miss.

How about a beer?

Not today.

Uschi trouble again?

Just a temporary low.

Good evening.

Uschi-bear?

I told you.

Either the new ngine or me.

And what's that?

My new turbo.

Sorry, man. Fate.

Want to know something?

Something true?

Really, really true.

The absolute truth.

Men...

Men are just better people.

Tell me it's not true.

A guy... Sh-t.

I don;t believe it.

Hello, how're you? Hungover?

What?

Coffee or tea?

I'll make both.

Aspirin's up there.

What time is it?

No idea,

Nine I think...

Damned.

I just have toasts

with margerine there

How do you like your toast?

I wouldn;t go out like that.

Not a good idea.

But I have to be at the stakeout.

Uh, work. Where are my clothes?

In the washer.

Beer stains.

I'll drive you.

What kind of clothes?

Anything that fits.

Ok?

Very ok.

Where do you work?

I'm with the...

I work for the city.

Go on, what happened then?

It was drinks on the house.

Then I took you home.

You kept saying you were homeless.

And then?

We went to bed.

That is... I put you to bed.

Up there's fine.

Your clothes?

Where can I send them?

My garage is in the back.

The offer still stands. Stay at my place.

Thanks, but no, thanks, Edgar.

Say... Anything happened last night?

Well... nothing you didn't want.

Welcome to the club.

I'm looking for a flat. Are they renting?

A hard night? Leave me alone.

Solo déjame en paz

Nice outfit. New disguise?

¿Nuevo camuflaje?

Just joking.

Oh, I'm not fucking the captain.

And i don't have a relative in the city hall

I'm just here to learn.

I have to make a phone call.

Coming?

Yes

I'll feed the pidgeons.

Keep an eye on the bar.

Anything unusual happens, take pictures.

Real tough work.

-That bimbo?

- Some 'bimbo'? 2 semesters of sociology.

A year of law, even a month at the FBI Academy.

Careerwise, she has everything we don't.

If life was halfway fair,

she'd at least look like sh-t.

Thanks. Thanks a lot.

Ever had an AIDS test?

What? Does Ursula...?

Did you get laid without a rubber?

Do me a favour. Don't ask.

Horny?

If you want to talk to us: just do it. Now.

Uschi, it's me.

Please answer, I know you're at home.

My sweet cub...

You can't imagine what a night I had.

Ursula...

Ok. That was it. Thanks, bye.

Asshole.

Can i stay with you a few days?

With me?

Hey I'm sorry I... What? That bad?

Sweet cub, listen... I gave up my apartment

Prematurely, I admit...

But we're still engaged.

And I need my car keys.

Yes, i know the trade fair's going on.

What?

The Men's Shelter?

Are you crazy?

Did you order a "Pizza con tutto"?

And a green salad.

Do you accept credit cards? I'm out of cash.

Wait.

Here. A jeans shirt? Top quality.

Just your size and colour.

98 Marks new.

Want some wine too?

Thanks, not really, but...

How to say... could I sleep at your place?

Excusi, I've got to get back to the Pizzeria...

Not like that.

I'm fairly normal.

There has to be a bed somewhere in this town.

Take credit cards?

If I have to.

Then, a big breakfast.

Orange juice, coffee...

A mineral water and a softboiled egg.

Do you have a toilet?

Inside.

That's my car!

Leave my car alone!

You asshole!

It's no use, that's what the police are for.

Yes, I know.

It's not gonna look too hot on your record.

Thanks a lot.

You and ursula. Is it serious?

What's wrong with women these days?

Can you tell me?

Too many hormones in the water?

Am I plumber?

Your fiance missed this.

Sorry, wrong topic.

I'm going to be around a while.

Can we adjust to that?

And if you feel as bad as you look,

I can't help it.

Alright, I'm going on my round. You do yours later.

Have a problem?

Yes, you could call it that.

Mr. Nice Guy

Name's Petrov; organizes the fake plates.

We want the "Czar"

We only know he's 60, Russian, drives a Jag.

And he's bringing fake papers.

I wanted to buy a round tonight.

But no sense inviting him.

Right. No point.

But I accept.

You look tired.

I tried to sleep in my car.

Could I spend a few nights here after all?

On the sofa?

Wherever. I have a guest room.

Feel right at home.

I have your clothes.

Edgar..., thanks.

It was love at first sight.

Listen, just a moment!

Tea? coffee? Or both?

Uh, before this gets complicated...

What's complicated?

I just need a bed for a night. Only.

And I'm only into women.

Too bad. Oh, no more coffee.

That's the way it is.

Fine.

No coffee.

- You know what I mean.

- Sure. Mineral water?

I could use a real drink.

Why are you a cop?

Acute case of BSE.

I wanted to work in a zoo,

but Im alergic to cats.

Really. No bullsh-t.

You guys think I'm on a career trip, right?

You're smart and attractive.

So you don't have a chance.

Thanks for the straight answer.

How about you?

Just don't bring any cats to work.

If that's what you mean.

I never mix work and pleasure.

Sure.

Look who's coming.

Who's that woth him?

A colleague?

No idea.

Hola, ¡aquí estás!

Hi, I'm Mike.

This is Edgar, a friend of a friend.

Hi Edgar. Helen.

We work together.

For the city too?

Kind of...

In the same unit.

Not tax people, I hope?

Red Libanese?

You're hip?

I hope so.

Smoke a lot?

Now and then.

You don't know each other long?

Eh?

Why?

Just asking.

The D.A's office complained they can't reach you

off duty and about your answering machine

Oh

I'd say we ignore it for now.

Inspector Niemcek.

Detective Rennmark.

Inspector Schwenk.

And what do you do?

Me? I remodel stolen cars.

Then we're a great team.

Where can we reach you?

My place. At least for the next few weeks.

4 8 3 9 6 5 for the next 2 weeks.

yes, yes. Temporarily.

Have an address?

Wiehlandstrasse 157, 3rd floor on the right.

Yeah...

He forgets it.

I'd better tattoo it on him.

What does Schwenk have against me?

Ah, Schwenk is a bit confused and doesn't want you to think he's a jerk.

So he overdoes it. More than usual.

Bueno, más de lo habitual

Clear. As long as I don't have to understand that - it's fine.

I can't invite you up for a coffee.

- Sure, not a good idea. - Yes.

It's ok. I understand.

Good night.

(lesbians ???)

Hello, ursula Roth isn't in and Christof Schwenk is dead...

If you have a message, leave it now.

I hope you're doing it with your steroid monster.

Just remember. The more muscle upstairs -

- the less downstairs.

What are you looking at? Beat it.

I'll keep track.

No problem.

Not feeling well?

If you want to talk... Good night.

A cop. I got myself a cop.

Oh no, it's Saturday!

Good morning.

Law and order, right?

'mornin'

Say...your upstairs neighbours...

Yeah, yeah, they play hard.

If it turns you on,

you know where to find me.

I thought men like you were neater.

Mmm, what else do you know

about "men like me"?

Sorry, forget it.

I don't know any...

¡Gays!

The word is Gays

G-A-Y three letters, easy to remember.

Try it sometime.

And if it's hard to say,

practice makes perfect.

Fine, I'll try it. Sometime.

Say... can you iron?

Sure. years of pro bachelorhood.

Then marry me.

Don't ogle me.

You're blinding me.

And wipe that "I'll get you" grin off your face.

I'm only into women.

The wrong ones maybe.

Fine, you said it. I heard it.

All I do all day long is think about getting into your pants.

Fine. I'll check the papers.

I'll have a place by Monday.

Monday? When did you look for a place last?

The year they killed Kennedy?

Edgar Sänger

Hi, Marko.

At my place?

Not this weekend.

I have company.

Not a man.

My mother's here.

You know how she just showes up.

Some other time, okay?

Hollo mamá

How about a spin?

It doesn't have tags.

You have enough illegal ones.

You searched my place?

All day long I think about

how I can bust used car dealers.

I tripped over them.

If you take back the "used car dealer" then...

May I?

Drive my car.

Look at that. Well, well, well.

Schwenk and mechanic?

On a test drive?

We questioned tnhat guy last year.

The oldtimer connection.

Schwenk's buying a classic sports car from him?

He can't afford a used Korean scooter.

Check... if the red tag's clean.

Calm down. Perhaps the guy is a pal of Schwenk's.

I doubt it.

Why?

He's a faggot.

Maybe Schwenk's on duty?

Embarrassing if he isn't.

You drive like a maniac.

Red tags are for temporary use, not joy rides.

The tags? They're stolen.

Want us to bust you?

No, I want him to.

We checked this car museum out.

So. let's all do something.

Good idea.

Listen... Watch what you say on the phone, okay?

Or you're dead.

Think of your appointment.

Where? At my inspection?

No, a new job. Chief programmer at a major bank.

Bye.

Professor Schwarzenegger.

Very funny.

Well, sister, which one?

Doctor, I hardly know them.

2 are my parents.

Sure. The 3rd is an ass. The 4th doesn't have one.

The 5th looks like one, the 6th snores. The 7th's right either.

No, the one is nice but a colleague.

The other's goodlooking but a pothead. And the 3rd's...

the 3rd's...

I'm exhausted.

Bad day at the hospital?

A patient died.

I know you don't want to hear it.

Motorcycle accident?

- Here - Thanks

A shooting star.

Or a crashing satellite.

I made a wish for you.

Oh, yeah? What?

Guess.

A man.

Thanks, sister dear.

What was the guy's name that I wrote your love letters to?

Efi something...

Efi Katlevsky

You and your helper syndrome.

I thought he was interesting.

I wish you had a real man again.

I'd prefere an apartment.

But all to myself?

Why is it that men are all frogs

before they turn into princes?

To rid us from mosquitos.

Hey.

Still annoyed about Anton?

Afraid you can't compete?

With a guy on every billboard with muscular nipples

you start wondering.

Do I know what women like?

Do they know?

Well, your figure's fine.

Thanks

How's the water?

Wet.

Good.

What are you doing?

Me? Having a bath.

Hand me the shampoo?

How about doing it later?

I always wash my hair first.

Am I making you nervous?

Yes.

Fine. The shampoo.

Very funny.

Hey, man. What's the problem?

You're only into women. I'm safe.

Sure, and it's your tub.

This is what your mama warned you about:

the big bad homo is trying to grab your gonads.

You're so funny and I'm the dumb cop.

You're the cool and I'm the prole. Great.

You just can't take being hit on.

You can't be a hawk, you're a mouse.

Know how I feel?

Do you even care?

Maybe I'd like a straight answer.

Like about: what happened that first night

If there's anything I should know.

Should know?

Yes! We have to talk about it.

Oh God. Now the AIDS number.

No use running to a doctor

and getting tested. It takes weeks before they can tell.

Thanks!

Thanks a lot for provisionally declaring me dead.

I'm sorry.

It's not so easy.

Yeah.

I'll get out.

No, it's okay.

Just would've been nice...

What?

If you'd asked me.

You probably would've said no.

No? Probably...

Shampoo.

Flowers?

Hello Edgar...

He's in the tub.

And you're his mother?

No, I just live here.

Send greetings to Edgar

from Marko.

Tell him I would've stayed longer but his mother

is too masculine for me.

Eh, one moment. You've got it wrong.

I'm making my round!

Please.

Somebody has to get food.

I've been twice already.

Then you know where.

Something wrong?

Just wondering

Ah, yeah? What about?

I thought men like you were extinct.

Very funny.

A currywurst for me.

Fine, same here.

Then get them.

No wonder.

No wonder what?

You got dumped.

Where did you...?

Let's leave my personal life out of this.

Now we're talking about lunch.

Praise the Lord.

Is it any of your business?

What do you know about me?

What I know about you?

Yes!

I'll tell you what I know.

I know there was always someting on TV

whenever she wanted to talk.

That after every fight, you brought her some dumb present

to clear the air.

You don't know the coulour of her eyes

or when the last time was you did what she wanted in bed.

You go nuts when she has her menstruation cycle.

And your definition of a nice weekend

is a big soccer game. or joyriding on the autobahn.

You cut your toenails watching TV.

You think that "Married with Children" is an educational show.

That's about it. Enough?

Cut it out please.

Looking in my head. Gives me a migraine.

Nothing in there could hurt.

Say... how you'd know all that?

Me?

I used to know someone like you.

Fine, I'll make my round and get some food.

Is sausage (currywurst) alright?

I need 5 minutes out there alone.

You think I've changed recently?

I know what you have.

A midlife crisis. But it'll pass.

Idiot.

Women don't react to me like they used to.

Don't worry about it.

For example - I react to you.

I'm going to check the back.

Chuck the sausages, guys.

A green Jaguar just pulled up.

Is the guy Russian?

I graduated a Russian school, I'll ask him.

What's she up to?

Sh-t, sh-t, sh-t. Is she crazy?

Wait till he answers in Russian.

I know the face.

- Police

- Hands on the trunk!

- And speed it up. No tricks!

- Great. And is he Russian? - Surely Russian.

Spread the legs.

I recognize his face.

Distract and bust.

You're going to be sorry.

Let's see what we have here.

I never forget a face.

Guys, guys... you almost ruined the concert.

But you made the papers.

Well, somebody has to direct traffic.

- Too bad. - Real funny, guys.

Speaking of traffic...

Schwenk, next time you drive around town

with red tags, make sure they're clean.

Do you owe us one again?

Here, for your new colleague.

She wanted to take a look.

If she wants

We'll show her a thing or two.

Yes, there will be a tough night for Rennmark colleague

Well, you can go to console.

I do not know if I need just to me for that.

Oh, she has a man?

No, living with a woman.

Yes? So what?

What's special about that?

Nothing. I just said that living with a woman.

Oh, and immediately you have to draw conclusions.

Conclusions? What conclusions?

Oh, no. If I have not suggested it has something with it.

Say it loud so rejoice colleagues.

You're crazy. Who usually make those comments in bad taste

about lesbians and homos ah? I do not. Seriously I do not!

No, Christof Schwenk called. Christof Schwenk,

The king of the jokes about fags.

Man, excellent.

Yes?

Ah, yes, I'm Christof. "Helen is?

No, he is sleeping.

The issue has affected her and took a bottle of wine.

If, uh, just wanted to deliver this.

Goodbye

Goodbye.

Tell me, should I give any reason?

Eh, yes, maybe I'm very sorry.

Today I spent in tone.

And it is a great companion.

Goodbye

Your cop-friend was here.

I said you were sleeping.

Which partner?

The frog?

Yes. I told him to leave.

Too bad. I would have liked to squash him.

What did he want?

Nothing.

He apologized and said you were an excellent companion.

Not Schwenk?

Oh yes, good night.

Good night.

"Schwenki" Well, well, well.

Your guy... He can fry the eggs himself.

I used the red toothbrush. I hope it's alright.

I would like some tea please.

He can't even make his own tea, or what?

Don't make such a face. Is this a scene?

You wish, right?

I do not like seeing strange

naked men in the shower

Did you forget who's apartment is this?

Tell me how did this silly toy get into your bed?

It's mine

I did not say anything

What then?

But say something!

Well...

Well. There are no pigeon poop. That's something.

It used to be a toy store here.

great place for parties.

Yes, there is also music. Where does it come from?

Yes, it's the drawback. A movie theatre downstairs.

What;s playing? "Action Film?

Yeah, well....hardcore or...

Some action there. Softcore maybe.

Say it is not true.

A porn cinema.

The place is empty, the previous tenant left it.

Who can stand listening to sex all day?

They just disturb and entice everyone around.

This apparently was commissioned in Kiev.

Now it just has to be stolen.

Busy. Busy.

Bees make honey.

Who is that?

Marko Reiferd. His uncle owns a junkyard

and apparently he's sold some stolen parts.

Here's a note : "Small Fish. Observe"

- Do you know him? - Me? No. Just wondering

Edgar, tell Marco to lay low.

What?

I do not find it funny

Do you know what awaits me if they find a connection between us?

Then the two can tweak to jail.

Maybe you'd like it.

Find him.

Problems?

Well sort of...

Your fiance, right?

Something like that.

I looked for a flat for tonight and a "fiance" might help

Mike unfortunately did not have time

If the apartment is fine, I may move with you.

Why? Is there something wrong with your current apartment?

It's not mine.

Edgar's had enough of you?

Not exactly.

Good compromised. Is it time?

Recently celebrated two years.

I hope in this case you're more decisive re the apartment.

Want children?

Children? Yes - by all means.

Anyway. Two, at least

It was a perfect performance

Oh, almost forgot.

Thanks.

Many compromises and breaches in recent days.

I should not have asked

Sorry if I cause trouble.

All right. Just was not adequate.

Are you sure?

It's the only thing I'm sure at this point

We will take something even

Somewhere where we can do whatever we want.

This is wonderful.

Sorry.

Maybe too much wine

or the moon.

The noise last night... it wasn't us...

I realized that

We did not do anything.

My influence is positive, right?

And why you cleaned up

and hid everything gay.

That is not important now.

I have to avoid rumors

And we have to seriously talk tonight about Marko

Okay, your coming out is postpone for a few days...

Promise?

I promise

I'll act straight when you see a cop.

Welcome to the Middle Ages

Good morning

Good morning

I used the green toothbrush, I hope you are well.

By the way, I wanted to ask a small favour

Other?

Well, I need to find a pair of strong men to help me move

And if Mike helps we'd be done in no time.

Sure, we'll be happy, right?

Sure. After all we are friends, aren't we?

Yes, Massa, yes, yes, yes

Your friend Edgar, doesn't he like me?

Eddie?

E.., Edgar? No, he likes you.

He's just a little shy.

Shy

But he has a man under the glass upright toothbrush

a Priapus with gigantic erection?

Tell me, last night ...

I'd rather not talk about it

I am going through a crisis

Ah...

Okay

Good morning

Good morning

Incidentally you to just come from a power breakfast, don't you?

Work related, of course.

Hey, don't ask, okay?

Yeah, okay ... it's obvious.

At last the old Schwenk is back as we know him...

Leave me alone, OK?

What is wrong with him anyway?

Could somebody tell me?

Before I met you, my life was in order

mine too.

If you were not so straight, there'd be no problem

There's a void in your life.

Okay, but I'm not the filling.

I am a accident.

Tell me ...what's with...

...a mistake.

...you and Helen?

Two cops. Absolutely impossible.

And for sure not at your place.

Any progress finding a pad?

I'm a pain, right?

Well...

There is this notion in the scene.

Every straight is gay, he just doesn't know it.

You seem to be the exception to the rule.

Unfortunately

We must separate ourselves a little

Well, I have to forget you.

I think I know what you need

How about that one over there?

What about him?

No, I do not like leather

Why? Clothes don't make the man.

And that other in the suit?

Friendly, funny, serious.

7 years ago has a stable relationship

Man, this isn't a bargain scale.

What about that one in front?

He's quite handsome.

Wow, did you also notice?

Yes, he's a pain. I know him.

So tell me what you want.

How can I know what you want?

I'm completely lost...

And there!

Where?

Well up there next to that guy.

The perfect blend of male and mouse

Come on.

Oh no, sh-t!

Colleagues

They know me.

There's a back exit.

No, too late.

Tell me that now was ...

Good evening, "I can see your IDs please?"

I hope that's enough.

He's one of my informers.

Have a good night.

Same to you, Inspector.

I can't believe it.

I'm running away from the police just to be in the wrong place

Welcome to the club.

For someone not homosexual you kiss pretty well

How do they know you?

"Schwenk?

With an informer

that matches the description of the mechanic.

Deixel, what does that tell us?

I think ...

we should check this mechanic.

Be more careful

Yes Massa. Sorry Massa ! I will look better next time.

If you could move your asses faster ...

What's in there? Lead Plates or what?

Yeah, whatever. Perhaps she collects weights?

Rock samples, ha?

Or heavy water?

If your policeman is no good, take the other. He's ok too.

Seem to think that I need it urgently.

You really think I need it bad.

That's not the word. Let me take my time.

Until you find the wrong one?

Where does this go?

Over there.

Well, what else do we have to do?

I need someone to do the renovating.

I wouldn't live in a place I renovated.

Yes, and I I have 2 left hands.

Yeah, I... I'm priceless.

Thirty for an hour.

Forty.

Thirtyfive.

I'm an idiot, but I need the money.

I take it.

You take the sofa, I go up to take the ironing board

You're a lazy pig.

Listen, I'm allergic to leather...

Take them both.

Leave me alone.

What?

Cut it out!

It's a miracle that no one's getting horny

when left alone with these orgy sounds

Have you noticed this country is oversexed.

Totally. Everywhere you look, people are having sex.

what?

Hey Chris, I have to talk to you.

One of my sources tells me that Kallenbach Deixel are

interested in his garage. Officially.

They are investigating

Edgar is clean.

If you have a car that is not...

would be better we get rid of him fast!

Thanks for the tip.

Edgar! "I'm at Helen's"

Sh-t.

Now he says he is a mouse.

No way! Did he?

Really?

I do not understand. Am I the cat?

I have the impression that you are a lot alike.

Chris says you're a little shy with women.

Well, yes...

Do I look like a rodent?

No, much better.

I'm sure you've been told that ...

you have a great ass

Every now and then.

Don't misunderstand me please.

I have no intention to seduce you, you know...

I have no problem with that. Same here.

Why not?

It is in me?

No. Really. It's me...

for a woman you have everything.

But I don't turn you on.

Uh, well...

Marko!

I'll give you a kick in the butt

You will not, young man.

Sorry, I didn't mean to you.

I hope so.

I am Edgar's mother.

If you don't mind...?

Yeah, right.

Thanks.

Since you live here, you can call me Iris.

Iris

Where is my son?

Is he at work?

Yes, car renovation. By the way, I'm Christof Schwenk.

I live here temporarily.

Mind if I call you Chris?

This begins to look like a real home with civilized people.

Is that your influence?

You should definitely stay longer.

Edgar needs someone who's orderly

like you. You're good for my boy

I, uh, I'm not ... I'm just ...

Yes, yes, of course.

You are right

Basically everything he does, does not concern me.

This is a misunderstanding

- Ah, no

- Yes

How did this get here?

This is mine

Aren't you both too old for this?

Listen, I'm just here a guest

Edgar and I are not ...

Calm down. I am aware of my son's sexual preferences

I mean, we live in the 90's...

And I do not have to like it

if you two are happy.

Yes, but me and Edgar, a moment ...

I'm not gay.

Did you sleep with my child?

I do not know!

You do not know?

This is getting more interesting, dear Chris.

So this is the first thing you have forgotten.

But I said I'm not...

How I can start something with your boy?

I don't have to be Catholic to go to church.

But if my son now sleeps with heterosexual

then you could try a woman.

Edgar's really only likes men.

How do you know?

And you too are also not too sure, right?

Besides, I know my son longer than you.

You do not think seriously that Edgar may have something with a woman?

It is not excluded.

Today it all works, right?

I mean, under certain circumstances, if a woman is attractive

intelligent, responsible and safe, why not?

Where is she working?

Where a colleague of mine.

So?

Is she smart, responsible and attractive?

She is.

and selfconfident.

You see?

That's a start.

By the way, you are also quite handsome by the way.

And you're sure you're not gay?

Me?

Hello, Eddi, dear!

Mother!

When did you come here?

Got a valid search warrant?

I had an interesting conversation with your charming roommate.

Ok, then I'm going to unpack the rest and then I will lie down from...

the trip...

But tomorrow I have to hear all about your pretty boss.

Good night

Good night

Why are you so late, eh?

How?

Surely you had too much to renovate, Eddi, my dear.

Tell me, are you both crazy or have smoked something?

Better tell me where will I sleep. With your mother?

My bed is big enough.

You wish. No way.

Then sleep in the bathtub or under a bridge

or go to a brothel. You and my mother

You two get on my nerves,

That I can assure you.

Do not worry. He's inherited this from his father.

It's a madhouse.

But none of weaknesses, right?

If my mother is visiting, I never can... anyway.

Great mother

Oh, you sh-t.

Even if one of you is not gay

you look like a perfect match.

The coffee is ready

Oh, mother ...

Ah, Marko

Feeding time! Oh...

I just woke up to the tigers.

I'm Iris, the mother of Edgar. Good morning.

Rennmark Helen, I'm Chris'n colleague

Ah, the beautiful Employer. Guys, have seen

Helen

You must tell me all about you.

Okay, here's the deal: You do not say you are gay

and I tell you that your garage me be searched.

Not enough.

If I turn my character, you have to help me with something.

Help?

The red Alfa on the patio is stolen

Insurance believes that six months ago is Ishinovkahot

Help me movi it out tonight

It's landing in the press, okay?

No selling spare parts, no traces, no trouble, ok?

OK?

Ok

Hi Helen

Hi Edgar

Good morning, Helen

Good morning

So early in the job?

Yes, the heater in the room was damaged.

I have to talk to you Iris.

Iris, well, she is a colleague.

Please do not tell her Edgar is gay. Please.

Just the opposite

And if something goes wrong with your garage, make sure it's clean.

immediately, okay?

Promised.

And not a word to Chris. This is a spontaneous breakfast visit

This car is fantastic

Alfa

Fantastic

I had one like this

Exactly like this one, really.

Till 6 months ago;

Oh, yeah?

And now it's gone

The Alfa.

How is that?

Missing, lost...

I was drunk and crashed into a wall

Totaled it

And then the police took my license. Imagine

Sons of b-tches

Don't you think also that the cops ...?

Nice car. Alfa

F-cking cops.

For this engine would have given me 5000

Goes to press

A beautiful car...Alfa... super class!

The cars and the engine will be finished soon

Have you heard about the ozone hole?

I'm seeing a very big one in front of me.

Oh, yeah?

Yeah

Let's make a break.

This smells like chicken poop

Aren't we exaggeratting a little?

Something stinks here. I can smell it.

Well, for you.

But look.

The informer and his teacher...

They act like a team.

Makes you wonder:

Why did his fiance suddenly throw him into the street?

You think...?

I will guess...

Schwenk?... gay?

Sorry I came so late

Thanks

Where?

There. I do not know what's happening with Schwenk.

He keeps avoiding me for days.

I heard the rumour that you're on the hunt for Helen

That ought to cheer you up.

Take the mechanic. At least he can fix something.

Am I wrong, colleagues, or smells a little chicken poop?

Very funny

Take a cold beer

That is needed. The gay one is here.

What happens?

Better that we leave.

You know what? I'm getting tired of you.

I go to parties I want to go

And I'm on holiday I want.

I do not know why, but my compass points to Chris.

And what are you waiting for?

Schwenk lately is living with the mechanic

Yesterday we went to look more closely at the car lot

And who comes home late at night hand in hand?

Like a couple in love

Schwenk with Edgar

Be careful not to let him get too close to you

Come Deixel

Chris?

What re you going out there?

You'll cath a cold.

It may not be as gay as you think

Or just on weekends or days or something.

Oh, yeah? Most men I know think they're tigers

Or at least a roosters

But that one says he's a mouse

That sounds pretty gay to me.

But mice breed.

Almost always, as a rule

It's so embarrassing.

"Helen?

Tell me - do you find it embarrassing or are in love with him?

I think both

This is serious. Are you going out already?

Not until I'm dead.

What did Mike want from you?

You're like a mother.

I do not want you to call me "mother"

But mothers do not have to know everything

Only makes them worry more

Now we're so comfortable here,

It must be like our first night

When?

Ah... again you're avoiding the subject.

I would not think even in my dreams. It's too exhausting

I know now what happened that time...

But I still won't tell you...

But I still don't know...

You really don't?

Ah, that... again...

It's gotten to be a reflex.

How can I explain it otherwise...?

Much could not have happened...

Raspberry.

What does that mean? "Yes" or "No"?

I don't know.

Listen, you were there, no?

Yeah, right.

But not entirely.

Blackout

One moment ...

A moment.

For heaven's sake, i don't know.

He does not know.

He does not know.

That has to sink in. He is going to bed with me

And doesn't know!

Say ...

What exactly does that mean ? "I do not know".

Is it something like...

Well, I-care-not-who-I-f-ck

"I do not know"?

Or what's-one-more-matter

"I do not know"

Or maybe it's this: When-I've-had-enough-drinks

then-f-ck-everything-that-moves. I do not know.

I say, against all my morals to sleep with a man

And I constantly wonder if I should stick with that or not

And you do not know!

I mean, do you really not know?

Shut up there, you perverts!

Or I'll call the vice squad.

And have you arrested.

I just know that I'm fond of you a lot.

Same here.

They say that nowadays everything is possible.

Yes.

But it is not true.

Simply not true

Sorry.

True love stories almost always end badly.

Listen

I, um ...

When an old octopus is too alone in an aquarium

He begins biting off his tentacles.

Well, I'm just a young gay but I don't want to come to that.

Wouldn't suit you either.

I know. I think I'll better get going soon.

Too bad.

Yes.

Too bad.

Schwenk is not gay

No? He lives with a "homo" and embraces him in public

He swings his hips better than Madonna already... Hold on to your values...

Hey, Schwenk, here is only for men. This shower room's for us.

Schwenk, do not go crazy, if you don't tip off

your boyfriend and his pals, everything is fine.

He's really cute

I'm really hot for tough guys, like you or Deixel

Where's your partener?

Unfortunately you only do it together

You piss together, shower together.

So do you think I'm gay?

Okay, so I am

GAY, GAY

Three-letter word

G, A and Y.

Got it?

And your little secret?

And your partner... Leaning on some hooker for a quickie.

We all know that!

Yes, and him

When have you paid last time for the Turkish meals?

Ah, Deixel!

Using your handcuffs again off-duty?

Or is that why your poor wife had a black eye the other day?

So from now on I'm the gay guy in this sedeshow!

Happy?

Have a good night.

You macho queen!

Oh, sorry about that.

You were good out there.

Back there?

You were... really would not have expected something like that from you

It was courageous.

Thanks

Although I also think it's lousy too.

Lousy? What?

That you're gay.

Oh, that.

Do not get me wrong. I think it's great that you're gay.

Haw long have you known?

Yeah, well ...

That does not concern me. I have no right to ask.

All right.

Only it's more complicated than you think.

That's right.

For some reason I can not explain,

I've fallen madly in love with you.

and...

the fact that you're gay does not change anything about it.

just ...

Only what?

Only complicates the situation.

Or maybe eased it.

or both.

Do you understand now?

Yes?

Loud and clear.

Yes? You do?

I do not.

Yes.

I understand you.

Well

Now I have only two choices

Either we stop now...

Or

Or not?

But if you really don't want to do it with a woman

There's nothing I'd rather do.

Or if the windows bother you...

There are no trees, no cats, no problem.

Well because I'm not repress

Much better

Now, nothing distracts me.

Open the door

And everything else we discuss later, right?

Yes. Later.

Much later.

They sure turned the sound up. Enough to drive you crazy.

Guys, I have to explain you something

It's a bit complicated, but...

Ah, sh-t!

No, boys, somehow... you could have warned me first...

After all we're on duty.

I do not mind, but ...

Shut up, Mike!

What?

Just shut up, Mike.

Ok

Sorry, colleagues. We went into action!

What?

Action!

Sh-t!

Come, come, come quick!

Sh-t!

The two escaped, you let them get away!

Why the hell didn't you guys use your walkie-talkies?

We were ...

We were in a pause.

Yes.

This break is going to cause problems and not make the D.A happy.

If the prosecutor finds out.

But Kallenbach, Kallenbach.

On a night like this I could care less.

Look I just finished my duty, here ...finished

Now begins my private life

Yes, this, incidentally my new boyfriend.

Yes, but you already know him.

Ah, did I ever tell you that I'm gay?

Sorry friends, I must have forgotten in the rush and it must've slipped my mind

If and when you two rabbits,

make any dumb remarks, then I'll just knock your lights. OK?

Well!

So, goodbye.

Do they come with us?

Do you understand anything?

Nothing.

Have you noticed how complicated the world has become?

it's hard to keep up...

In Greece, cops can retire after 15 years of service

Here is barely sufficient for a rest cure

I was told that here they send you to a spa. Bad Salzufflen's for example.

Really? It is supposed to be nice.

Once I was in Bad Orb

Wasn't bad...

Yes, that can feed the deer there in the park...

Deer?

"...but there's still so much to learn..."