Original subtitles

Passengers on flight 455 to Madrid...

...please go to boarding gate 6.

-Done. -Why didn't you check the bags?

You know I hate to wait. Besides, it's just for a few days.

Are you still mad?

Why do you have to leave the week before?

-I have to go get him. -He's 31!

-Can't he get on a plane by himself? -He won't answer the phone.

Is he being an idiot, on drugs or what?

-I don't know. -Maybe he won't open the door.

Come on! Maybe something is really wrong with him!

Bu, bad news travels fast.

Wedding stress is getting to you. You're talking nonsense!

Does he know our wedding is next Saturday?

He does.

He should come, then! Maybe he doesn't want to be there.

That's why I have to go! I know something's wrong.

I'm not getting married if Javier is not there!

He's like a brother to me. Besides, he loves you.

-I'm scared of this trip. -Why?

It's too far, it's a long fligth and it's the most important day...

Of our lives. I know, sweetie. I know.

I know.

Trust me.

I'll be okay.

I love you.

-Bye, my love. -Bye-bye.

-I love you. -I love you, too.

Passengers on the flight to Madrid, please go to the boarding gate.

Last call for passengers on flight 455 to Madrid...

LOVE OF MY LIFE

Hello?

I hate him! I hate him!

I hope he will sign, go back to Madrid and get lost forever!

Speak for yourself. You know I've always been crazy for Javier.

Carlos is so busy and he had to go look for that moron!

You're such a bitch!

What if he is dead and his body is floating on the Seine?

The Seine is not in Spain, but in Paris, you dummy!

Lucia, don't get mad, you'll get wrinkles!

It will be okay as long as he's back for the wedding.

He'll be back next Friday.

Are you sure?

Yeah, I've looked into it!

If he misses his flight, there are more before the wedding.

I'm not an idiot.

-Did you get your dress? -I'll pick it up today!

Do you want to come?

Come on! You'll be the first to see it!

No! I'm not done with my make up!

Perfectly blended foundation, because I'm not a clown.

Then eyelashes, lipstick, blush and boobs...

You would be late.

-It's so hard to be a woman, right? -Tell me about it!

I haven't eaten in a week, my diet syrup tastes like hell.

Maybe it will help me detox.

-I killed him! -What?

-Are you Ok? -Yes!

-Lucia! -I killed Blue Demon!

I close the door to any jinx! Keep it out!

Keep it out! Keep it out!

Should I call an ambulance?

No, I'm fine.

-You can't walk! -I can move my legs.

But they hurt like hell!

-So I should call an ambulance. -Take me to a hospital!

Who? Me?

Yes, you.

Where do you want me to take you?

I don't know.

To my place?

Is your dad a doctor?

No.

Then I'd rather go to a hospital.

Were you scared?

I thought I had killed you. I didn't know what to do.

What?

I'd never killed anyone before. That was new to me...

...so I didn't know what to do.

You did fine.

-I thought you'd hit and run. -And leave you there?

I'm not that kind of girl.

Chill out!

Worse case scenario, they cut off my leg.

Sorry, I'm so stressed! I don't know if it's...

...the accident or the fact that I'm so damn hungry.

Look at my leg! Look at my leg! Look at it!

It's fine, okay?

Yuck! Disgusting!

Miss...

May I speak to you?

Yeah.

Maybe they're going to cut it off. You should pray.

Lucia.

And I, who thought you would become a cripple.

Is that all?

Yes. I missed a very important appointment...

...for a bandage and ointment.

You should not talk on the phone while driving.

You should not ride a bicycle wearing a wrestling mask.

I have dermatitis. The sun is bad for me.

You should go out by night, so you won't ruin someone's day.

Hey.

Can you help me?

It's the least you can do.

-Do it yourself. I have to go. -I can't get up.

Lucia.

-How do you know my name? -I'm a clairvoyant.

-Lucia. -What?

Did you pay the bill?

You're a sleazebag!

Thanks.

I can't believe it!

-I missed you so much, you jerk! -Are you crazy?

Why don't you answer the phone?

-You're getting married! -So, I had to come and get you.

-I missed you so much. -Yeah, right.

-Madrid has changed a lot. -So have we.

I'm still the same. How long have you been here?

Five years, three months, seventeen days.

-Ready for the wedding? -Yes!

First let's go for a drink and catch up. I'll go to my room.

Nothing in here is yours anymore!

Are you still mad? Really?

Are you still traveling light?

-I haven't changed, chubby. -I'm not chubby anymore.

Jesus!

Unpack and let's go have dinner. I'll take you to an amazing place.

I don't want a bachelor party. I came for you.

Javier.

Why do you have baby clothes?

It won't fit! I look like the Pillsbury Doughboy!

I can't breathe! I look like the Michelin Man!

What do you mean?

You're skinnier than a darn stick, sweetie!

I'll take it and I'll only have Diet Coke and cigarettes.

Calm down! You're making me nervous.

I'm crazy for coming to Madrid a week before the wedding.

How is the fair going?

The paintings are selling like hotcakes.

But professional success doesn't give you a hot body.

I only eat bread and prosciutto and food is greasy here!

You should have come with me!

Spain is too far! Besides, my feet are swelling up.

See? Whenever I need you, you're unavailable...

...and when I don't, you're under my nose!

No. It's so bridal! Mom, it's fluffy!

I wanted something short, simple, strapless and you know.

You're so confused. You don't know what you really want.

It's fine as long as I don't want to change the groom.

It's the only thing I'm sure of!

Wait, mom! I can't breath! I'll call you later!

So you don't like my dress.

I'm the best wedding dress designer in Madrid.

Not only in Madrid, in Spain!

Not only Spain, Europe! And you don't like my dress.

No, it's not that.

Enough! I heard you on the phone!

Sorry, I've had a bad day.

You want it shorter?

Maybe.

Not white?

It's predictable.

So, you don't want a wedding dress!

I can make a red one. Blood red. Vamp-like. Skin tight.

Or yellow, kimono style, like in Japan. What do you want?

Next time you criticize one of my designs...

...ask yourself whether the problem is the dress...

...or the wedding.

-Finally you answered! -Hi, how are things going?

Fine! Tomorrow I'll get the wedding dress.

Did you like it?

Yes.

I loved it... It's...

...very comfortable and it has these little...

Ana, are you doubtful?

I think so...

-About the gown or the wedding? -No!

No! It's my insecurity, don't listen.

I looked fat.

What?

-But you're so skinny... -I gained weight, Leon!

-You'll lose it by our wedding day. -I'll start a diet today.

Okay... Tell me something.

Why do women want to become a different person...

...for their wedding day?

Change their make up, their hair style.

-You become another person. -Leon!

And then we say: "You're not the woman I married".

Because we married a cold inexpressive mannequin.

I fell in love with you with those extra pounds.

You're so rude.

Tell me, how are you doing?

Bad.

-Why? -A car hit me yesterday.

-How? -I was riding my bicycle...

...and a woman didn't see me and boom! I went flying!

Are you Ok?

Yes, it was not a big deal.

I mean, I got some bruises, and my knee and foot are hurt.

Jesus, no!

Leon, next Saturday you have to be the king of the dance floor!

I will be.

That stupid woman!

Yes, stupid woman.

Blind fat bitch!

-Yeah, fat! -Was she ugly?

Disgusting!

-She deserves that, for being so... -Fat.

Fat.

The good thing is that I'm fine.

Yeah. I'm glad you're fine.

I'll call you tomorrow to tell you how the preparations are going.

Okay. Perfect!

-Get some rest. -You too.

Bye.

I love you.

-Hello? -Lucia?

Who is it?

Leon.

Who?

It's me, Leon.

I'm going to hang up.

Don't! It's me, Leon! We met yesterday.

Oh, Leon!

Blue?

-Blue Demon? -Yep.

How did you get my number?

-I told you, I'm a clairvoyant. -No, you are a freak.

Do I owe you something?

I ran out of ointment. Bring me more.

You're really a sleazebag.

This sleazebag wants to invite you dinner.

Leon, I'm getting married.

So I am.

I hope. Someday.

I'm getting married next Saturday.

What? Next Saturday?

Yes. Believe it or not.

It's about time.

"It's about time"?

-Yes. -God, you're really in love.

And...

Have you cheated on him?

-What? Of course not! -There's always a first time.

I'm going to hang up.

Come on, it's just dinner. Have dinner with me.

I won't. I hit you yesterday, I couldn't pick my dress up, and...

It's a sign!

Believe me. I know. Come on, just dinner.

Okay.

And I won't call you again.

I'll get out of your life. Otherwise, I'm going to insist.

I'll find out where your wedding is and when the priest says:

"If anyone objects to this union, speak now or forever hold your peace".

I'll speak.

What would you say?

Do you believe in love at first sight?

I do!

What?

Carlos!

-What do you do? -I do marry you.

Remember when I said that?

Of course I do! Is everything all right?

Great! Better than ever.

I just want to tell you I'm fine and we're going to celebrate.

Where?

We don't know.

Just the two of you?

Yeah, just the two of us, sweetie.

Have fun.

I'll see you on Saturday.

-You won't be calling me again? -Why are you so suspicious?

I don't know. I think I am nervous.

Stop taking all that crap to lose weight...

...and stick to the sedatives, Ok?

I will.

Yeah. I'll tell him.

-What? Tell who? -Yeah. Javier says hi, too.

Okay, then. I love you.

Kisses, Bu.

She loves you.

I knew you would call.

Why?

These things don't happen every day.

And this is what life is about, isn't it?

Things happening to us.

-I don't know what I'm doing. -Asking me out.

-You're a sleazebag! -And I'm going to say "yes".

"Romita", 8:00 PM.

I'll be there.

Love is...

Damn! That's a tricky question.

Love is...

Getting horny with just a glance.

For me, love is passion.

Love is a hassle.

Is waking up every morning with this feeling in your stomach...

...and not knowing why you're there.

Love is a terminal illness.

Love is past tense.

In present time we screw up, we miss and love the one we lost.

Love is...

Look.

This one is my favorite.

She can't even talk.

Because she's remembering him. Look at her eyes.

Love is...

I don't know.

-What did she say? -"I don't know".

-But you were there! -She said that, dumbass!

Why is this your favorite?

She is the only one who thinks about it and cannot express it.

-Your video is pretty cool. -It's a documentary.

Okay, but how will you make a living?

Have you come here just to scold me?

You know why I am here.

Can I tape you?

No. No way!

Ask her.

Come on.

Go.

Sorry to bother you.

I'm shooting a documentary about the definition of love.

-Can I tape you? -Sure!

Really?

Love is...

Love is a journey.

Thank you. Excuse me.

Let me see.

-You'll finish it at my wedding. -You know I can't.

Dude!

It's my wedding! You're my best man! We planned it since we were kids!

We planned things that have not happened and never will.

I bought you a ticket.

I'm scared.

Okay, tape me.

Come on!

Love is...

Being there.

Fucking manipulator!

-I'm clever. -Be careful, dude!

Good evening.

Evening.

No, just "evening".

"Good evening" is a clich�. If I die tomorrow that's not good.

This time yesterday I was crying. I won't tell you why.

They say I'm bipolar.

But today we're fine, so evening! How are you doing, man?

Can I have a drink?

Sure! That's why I'm here! What can I get you?

A beer.

-Dark, pale? -I'd rather drink some water.

-Water, yes... -No, I prefer lemonade.

-Lemonade... -Orangeade!

With still water.

-Come on, man! -What?

I told you I'm bipolar.

I have to make the most of my time In case the world is ending

I have the heart of a tramp Looking for my freedom

I have travelled around the world And I've noticed that

Where war and hate don't exist Love is king

One, two, three...

...four, five, six! Come on!

Hello?

Shaila, I'm a whore!

I act, dress and smoke like a whore, so what am I?

-A fun girl? -How can you say that?

That's why you're alone, you damn slut!

-I'm getting married on Saturday. -Go straight to Reforma Avenue.

Yes, at nine o'clock. Good! Statue and fall down!

Relax! Besides, he's in Madrid!

-Yes, but it counts! -Okay, listen to me.

Prepare yourself mentally. Consider this your last sin.

-Your bachelorette party. -No!

It's not a bachelorette party! He's not a stripper!

-This is different! -Down with the sock!

-Don't brainwash me! -I'm not!

Then, why did you say yes, Lucia?

I don't know! Because I liked him...

...or maybe because of the pressure, the wedding stress...

...or because of the whore in me!

Sweetheart, just think:

What is he doing in Madrid right now? Have you thought about it?

He's having fun, partying...

...drinking wine, writing poetry, starry sky, Dal�, come on!

Stand up, please!

Just five seconds!

Get it?

He wouldn't do anything like that.

Listen, I have to finish the rehearsal.

We'll talk later, okay? See you! Call me!

Call me!

Okay? Bye-bye!

I don't like the monkey, let's do the cat!

Cat is not like that, but like this!

Is not like that! Like this!

I don't want "Thriller"! Give me a domestic cat!

Take the next exit...

...or keep straight to change your destination.

Next U-turn in 50 meters.

Recalculating route.

Can you give me another orangeade? With still water.

And a lot of ice.

"Curly"!

Get the mister another orangeade.

If I don't see you again I wish you the best of luck

Since it is so late and you won't answer the phone...

...it's clear that you've made a fool of me.

But I'll always know that I dared to ask you out.

But I would have kissed you.

I won't see you again, so I'll tell you this:

I would have fucked you, 'cause you're so hot!

There was chemistry between me and you.

But you chose not to see it.

I hope it will rain on your wedding day...

...with your small-sized boyfriend.

Otherwise, you wouldn't be looking for another man.

Don't call me! I won't pick up the phone!

This is bullshit!

I live so far from here!

I will be the cat under the rain

And I will meow for you

-A shot of tequila, please. -Sure, man.

Is everything fine?

Have you ever been in love?

Many times.

-You are married. -Yep.

-That's fucking tough. -Well...

But fucking awesome.

It's forever.

You'll fuck the same woman for the rest of your life.

Are you telling me...

...that if I fuck other women it means I don't love my wife?

-Maybe you're right. -You're wrong, man.

Not "maybe". I'm right.

You have to learn to tell...

...what is just fucking and what is love.

Tell me, are you in love?

I think so.

Come on! Are you in love or is it just sex?

That happens all the time and you get confused.

Sex is a serious thing! Listen:

I have a buddy, "Mr. Ugly".

He used to fuck the hottest chicks in the city! My hero!

He told me:

"When you get one of those chances that you can't miss...

...I mean a really hot chick that you can't just not fuck...

...you use the 'pre-forgiveness'.

It's like 'Dear Lord, forgive me...

...for I'm going to fuck her.'

After you fuck her, you can employ the 'post-forgiveness':

Dear Lord, forgive me, for I've already fucked her.

And then you get a cigarette".

-You're a real jerk! -I swear.

It works, I swear!

-I'm going to make a phone call. -Your girl?

Yes.

Hello?

Ana... did I wake you?

Leon?

Yes... I'm sorry. I didn't realize you were sleeping.

What did you think I was doing?

I don't know.

What happened?

Nothing. I wanted to tell you about something I did yesterday...

Tell me, honey, I'm already awake.

It's nothing.

I'm a jerk.

Go back to sleep. I fucked up.

I'll call you tomorrow, okay?

Ana...

Forgive me.

Okay, it's no big deal.

Kisses. Bye.

I mean it.

Forgive me.

I'm Javier Gonzalez!

I quit architecture to make documentaries...

...because I'm so fucking lazy!

It's noon and I'm still sleeping, because I'm an artist...

-...and I work at night. -Stop!

Yesterday I went to a bar and I drank a lot of booze...

...while I asked people what love is.

For me, Javier Gonzalez, what is love?

Enough!

Wake up, man! Get dressed and let's grab a bite.

Javier, did the landlady who left her baby's stuff...

...also forget her clothes in your drawers?

-Keep out of my stuff. -It's okay, man!

I came all the way here just to find out all this weird stuff!

-It's nothing! -Then why don't you come back?

I came... Because of Andrea, who left me!

A week before the wedding!

She did you a favor.

Turning me into a mess? Well, thanks, Andrea!

-Give me a break! Think about it! -It's not my fault, jerk!

You should have been with me.

I begged you to stay.

What for?

To see you and Lucia, knowing that Andrea is her best friend?

Did you want that?

Shaila is Lucia's best friend.

Times have changed.

Imagine how much we have changed.

I haven't heard from Andrea.

But she'll be at your wedding. We planned that too.

If that is the problem...

...I will ask Lucia to talk to her, but you need closure.

You're still not over her and I don't want to imagine how you're coping.

-You don't understand. -Especially if you don't talk to me.

-No. -You have changed, bitch.

-Please, don't make fun of me. -Of course I won't.

You can't smoke in here.

I'll go outside, okay?

-I'll be back soon. -Whatever.

I'll take as long as I have to.

Do you have a cigarette?

-Are you Mexican? -Are you racist?

I'm not! I'm Mexican too.

I'm amazed at how many Mexicans I've met here.

-Want some Diet Coke in exchange? -No, thanks.

Leon?

Jesus, Mom! I thought it was Leon.

Have you forgotten your own mother?

No. But any calls from Mexico show on my phone as "private".

Well, calm down.

At the end of the day, only family matters.

Yes, Mommy that's why I'm starting my own.

Dear, you are so wrong.

I'm very nervous, Mom! I hear it will be cloudy.

You insisted on having a garden wedding!

It's not my fault that you didn't get to organize your own!

What if it rains?

It won't! It's not rainy season!

What do you mean? Seasons don't exist thanks to global warming!

I've told you a thousand times not to use English terms with me!

Global warming, Mom! Don't you see how it affects the world?

We're devastating the Earth and we don't even notice!

Mom?

He's so handsome!

Mom!

She hung up!

Ana?

I'm at the bank. I can't talk.

At this hour?

I'm depositing the check for the party.

You were supposed to do that yesterday!

Do you remember I was run over?

Well, hurry!

I'm number...

I have to wait too much!

Fucking women!

Fucking women!

-Didn't you live far from here? -I work nearby.

-So you hang around here. -You stood me up!

I told you I was getting married.

-Now you aren't? -I am!

I forgot my ring!

Sorry, wrong verb tense.

Sorry for your grammar or sorry you stood me up?

Both.

Do you want to make me feel guilty? It won't happen.

Do you think this is causality or coincidence?

What do you mean?

I mean...

...causality is planned and coincidence just happens.

Do you think I'm following you?

No, but I think a Supreme Being is doing this.

-It's a test. -You're getting on my nerves.

Hey... what were you going to tell me?

Oh, that...

You said that you wanted to kiss me.

You're dangerous!

I said I wanted to do something else, too.

-What? Fuck me? -Yep.

Don't move, motherfuckers!

-Can't you hear? -I'm talking to you, bitch!

Hands on your head and keep quiet!

-Get down! Do you hear me? -Relax, relax.

-Everything's going to be Ok. -Shut the fuck up!

Do you have a death wish, pretty boy?

Go to the cashiers!

Maybe this is the last day of our lives.

Relax.

We're going to make it.

I wanted to fuck you, too.

'Cause you're so fucking hot!

Take your clothes off! Come on!

Take your clothes off! Come on!

Javier, the baby! Javier!

Something's wrong with the baby!

Javier!

-Are you Ok? -Yes.

-Are you Ok? -Yes.

That's great, dude.

I've always worried about you.

Sorry I disappeared.

Don't apologize. That's the way it is.

You know I'll always be there for you.

I'm sorry for what I said about Lucia.

-I don't remember. -What if Lucia was fucking...?

Cut that shit!

And you're wasting water! Get out of there!

Or are you one of those who cry in the shower?

Wimp!

Come on! I want some drinks!

Look.

-Where did you hide it? -Inside my underwear.

They may take my wallet, but never my car.

Besides, I'm pretty skillful with my hands.

I thought that...

-What? -Nothing.

It's nothing.

-Everybody's leaving. -Do you want to call home?

-Did you hide your phone in there too? -No, I didn't.

-But you can ask anyone... -Come on!

I don't want to see anybody in this state!

-Just go out... -Come on!

-...and call a cab! -Yeah, I know! I'm sorry!

I'm like... I don't know.

I can give you a ride.

Okay.

Let's go.

They told me: "Give me the money, you fucking bitch!"

I'm sorry.

A lot of things have happened in just a few days.

You're a spoiled girl.

Please, don't start. Okay?

It's true.

You want to win every time, so this is the result.

-Why do you say that? -Because life is not like that.

You have to allow yourself to make mistakes.

To be told to fuck off.

To screw up. To freak out.

To realize that at the end of the day...

...it's all Ok.

-I will be the cat under the rain. -What?

Yes.

I was singing that song that day when...

...I stood you up. I did a U-turn and I was singing...

..."The Cat Under The Rain".

I've never heard it.

It was very famous. Before the chorus it goes like:

My love

If someday we run into Each other somewhere

Buy me a cup of coffee And make love to me

And if I don't see you again

I wish you the best of luck

You can see

Such is life

Now you leave

And I stay right here

Dear Lord, forgive me...

...for I'm going to fuck her.

I will be the cat

Under the rain

You can see

Such is life

Now you leave

And I stay right here

It will rain

And I won't be yours anymore

I will be the cat

Under the rain

And I will meow

Dear Lord, forgive me, for I've already fucked her.

For you

For me, love is fantasy...

...freedom...

...passion...

...war...

...trust...

...but above all those things, if it's true love...

...so much happiness

Mom?

I had a nightmare.

That's too bad!

I want to know if everything is fine.

Yes.

But I got botox for your wedding and I can't talk much.

Mom, I want to thank you.

I know it hasn't been easy. The distance, the wedding...

...Diet Coke and cigarettes.

Thank you.

You must thank God...

...who took your Dad's soul.

Mom, don't say that.

Well, I asked Him every night...

...with devotion and faith, Ana.

I decreed it, and now you see!

Okay, Mom.

Bye.

Hello?

Hi!

Honey!

Are you okay?

No, Ana, Im not.

I'm pissed!

What's wrong?

I'm sorry, but I can't get married.

I can't marry you.

Leon, are you Ok?

No, I'm not!

You don't know what you're saying!

Yes, I do! I'm telling you I won't marry you!

-Are you drunk? -I'm not!

I'm not high! I just...

-You can't do this to me! -I'm so confused!

-I can't sleep! -How will you after this?

You can't do this to me!

Leon, what happened?

Do you remember the woman who hit me?

I had a bad feeling about that!

I'm not dreaming!

I'm sorry.

Honey, don't make a decision right now.

I'll take the first flight to Mexico, okay?

It would be better if you stayed there.

You can't say that! We're getting married on Saturday!

Honey, I'm sorry. Tell me what happened.

I don't know.

I don't know! Really!

Listen...

When you see me...

...you will realize what we have together...

Ana, it's useless! I've made up my mind!

You can't do this to me! You can't do this to me!

It's the best I can do for you.

Hold on! I'm on my way!

I'm going to be sick.

Take a deep breath. It will pass.

-How much is it? -30 euros.

Here.

Do you have ten?

-Carlos! -Keep it down! I get dizzy.

Take some Valium.

If I take it now I'll fall asleep in the waiting room. I'll be fine.

Here's the 10.

Here. Thank you.

-Hey! You forgot a suitcase! -I won't take that.

Excuse me, do you have a wife or little children?

I do.

If you're not superstitious, keep it. I hope it will be of use.

Okay, thank you.

Thank you.

I feel terrible!

Wait!

Watch my luggage!

Damn! I'm sorry!

-Are you okay? -I'm not.

Are you alone?

Passengers on the flight to Mexico, please go to the boarding gate.

Calm down. Can I help you?

Could you...

...watch my things? I don't feel good. I need the toilet.

-Are you Mexican? -I am.

-Are you going to Mexico? -I am.

-We're on the same flight. -How do you know that?

Because I need to take the next flight to Mexico.

I see, I'm sorry. Go ahead, I'll wait for you here.

Passengers on flight 178 to Mexico City...

...please go to the gate 15.

-How do you feel? -Better, I threw up.

Disgusting!

Did you go shopping?

I'm taking care of some girl's suitcase.

-We have to check in! -She won't take long.

This is dangerous! What if she's carrying a pound of cocaine?

Or many pounds of cocaine? That would be cool!

-Are you a drug addict? -Not anymore.

It's an emergency! I think a relative is dead.

Javi, I feel like shit!

When you throw up you produce a cold sweat.

As if your pores exuded freezing water, get it?

Well, this feeling only lasts 15 minutes, I can't waste it.

Okay, go check in.

Javier, bring the Valium or it will be the worst flight ever.

But you wanted to party.

Passengers on the flight to Mexico, please go to the boarding gate.

Passengers on the flight to Mexico, please go to boarding gate 5.

Mexican suitcase girl, I'm waiting for you!

Mexican girl?

I'll leave your stuff!

I don't trust you.

Mexican girl?

Hello?

I'm a whore, Shaila! A slut!

Wake up! I need you to listen.

-What should I do? -Play dumb.

Then what? Behave as if nothing happened?

He will notice it! I can notice it myself!

-I smell of him! -Take a shower.

I did! I don't literally smell like him, you idiot.

It's something else.

I...

I can't imagine how he's going to react. He's going to get mad!

-He'll call off the wedding! -He doesn't need to know.

I can't believe I jeopardized everything.

It's different for you, guys, because...

...for you sex is just that. You don't mix your feelings.

Don't tell me you're in love.

Of course I'm not!

I really liked it.

He was so hot!

Wake up! I need you to listen carefully.

It was rough, you know?

I love rough men!

Shut up, bitch!

I mean...

Carlos is very different.

I've never felt anything like that before.

It's the newness. You'd get used to it or things would get worse.

I had one like that once. He was rough, a real thug!

And that turned me on. Until one day, he spits on me.

He spat on me and I found it not erotic at all.

What?

Yes, he spat on me.

Like...

I'm open-minded but that kind of game is not my thing.

I'm not a pervert.

-That's disgusting! -I know!

-Nobody noticed it? -Sure, I threw up in the line.

I didn't even try to reach the toilet.

-What did you do? -Nothing. I just was standing there.

What about you? I couldn't risk missing the flight.

-How embarrassing! -Well, I won't see them again.

What about the girl? Did she lose a relative?

-She didn't, crazy woman! -Then why was all that mess?

She broke up with her boyfriend. Take this.

Are you in the last row?

Don't make fun of me. Fortunately we could check in.

Thanks to the scene she made.

-You are not going to sleep. -I'll dope her.

-Have some rest. Love you. -Love you.

Thank God you're here! Takeoffs freak me out.

No kidding!

Want some Valium? It will help you relax.

No, thanks. I ate so badly all week.

-I'm on a diet. -You're skinny!

I wanted to fit into my wedding dress.

-Were you getting married? -Didn't you hear what I said?

Fucking hell, all men are the same!

Everything you said to the airline crew was true?

Yes.

Don't get married, then.

Social pressure doesn't matter when you're looking for happiness.

Why else would you still be considering it?

Because I'm in love.

-It has to be mutual, Mariana. -Ana.

I'm Ana. Nice to meet you.

Nice to meet you.

Please hold me. Takeoff really freaks me out.

Maybe it's none of my business, but if he is getting cold feet...

...maybe it will be worse in the future.

Marriage is hard even when people are crazy in love.

-Are you married? -No, I'm not.

I was about to do it.

Did she stand you up?

She cancelled the wedding a week before.

I...

Jaime, I know I'm not easy to get along with, but I do my best.

My name is Javier.

-Did you argue a lot? -No!

He doesn't like it that I'm an independent woman.

He wants me to stay home and take care of the children.

I was going to be a dad.

And... she had a miscarriage.

And I lost the one I thought I'd be happy ever after with.

I'm sorry.

Don't worry. I'm fine.

I'm doing my best.

-What were you doing in Madrid? -I went to the Art Fair.

I trade art.

Those canvases painted in a single color...

...with a black dot that cost millions?

Or those sculptures of a chair with a rotten apple...

...in the middle called "Loneliness".

And it costs more than my parents' house.

I like art too. Not modern art, but I like it.

I love it! I know contemporary art is weird.

-I hate... -...Romero Britto.

-I knew it! -How come?

You look like you would.

-Do I look smart? -No...

You look... Jewish?

What's up, Tomas?

"Curly", where's my lemonade?

-What's up, Tomas? -What's up, dude?

-Ana arrives today. -I'm sorry, Ana who?

My girlfriend, I told you about her the other night.

Right! The "pre-forgiveness guy"!

-That's me. -Sorry, dude. I was drunk.

-She's coming back from Madrid. -Well...

Awesome, dude!

I live nearby and I wanted to tell you.

Well, dude...

Just...

...say hello...

...to Ana, dude.

-Awesome! -I will.

Cool! Here.

Beer is the way to go...

Listen, dude... I used the pre-forgiveness...

...and then the post and...

...I fucked another woman.

Fucking blondes, dude! You're so horny!

All white guys are horny!

I don't know why, but you are. Great, dude!

We were going to get married.

What do you mean? What happened?

I called off the wedding.

Did she find out?

I told her.

Give me a break! You're a real dumbass!

If there was a dumbass contest, you'd lose, you're so dumb!

You're the real thing!

Help me out here, "Curly"!

You can't do that! It's your best friend's wedding!

-I think you're nervous. -I haven't seen her in a long time.

That woman, Andrea, dumped you because she's an idiot.

I'll tell her I came out of the closet.

You'd lose. Gossip spreads like wildfire.

It's the best revenge for any woman who has a brain.

I'll tell her: "I cheated on you with a man...

...and now I'm happily married.

-And you are divorced, right?" -I'd love to see her face!

But many a true word is spoken in jest.

No way! I really love women!

Where is Carlos?

-He is devastated! -No more than I am.

If Leon leaves me it will be your fault! I should have slept!

If he does, I'll buy you a coffee. We'll be more comfortable.

-Don't make fun of me! -No, I'm not.

Here.

-Thanks. -If you don't get married...

-...call me. -Is this your bag?

Yes, dude.

-Thanks. -Here.

-Well... -Bye.

-Bye. -Bye.

-Are you going to tell me? -Sure!

Lucia! Are you okay?

Carlos, we need to talk.

-We agreed to meet at the church. -Carlos, we need to talk.

-What are we doing now? -Can you come with me?

-I'll go to your place. -I knew you'd come.

I asked Shaila to take you.

-Really? -Yes, she's there.

-I mean, is this really happening? -It is.

Take my bag. The keys are inside. I'll see you at home.

Come here!

Javier! What are you doing?

Javier!

How are you?

It has been years! I can't believe it!

-You don't recognize me, do you? -Sorry, I don't.

I've changed a lot.

Dude...

It's me, Fernando.

-Fernando? Hi, dude! -Don't push me, man!

-What is your new name? -Shaila.

Like Shaila Durcal.

The daughter of the singer. She's less talented but younger.

And she's alive.

And living is the most important thing.

Why didn't anyone tell me about this?

Because you were lost in Europe.

Going on picnics in Versailles, with royalty.

Picnics!

You look so slim!

You look really good.

So do you.

Thanks.

I always knew you would do it.

-You sucked with women! -Come on!

Don't you say that.

Many women would love Fernando to take care of them.

Go to Hell!

Hold on, dude!

Hold on! Be careful!

Woman, woman

The Devil is here, at the door

Why don't you pretend to be dead?

Why don't you dance Can-can

Just for me?

Just for me?

If they ask for you

What am I going to say? What story am I going to make up?

When you are not Around here anymore

What am I going to say? What story am I going to make up?

If they ask for you

What am I going to say? What story am I going to make up?

When you are not Around here anymore

What am I going to say? I will have to pretend!

Woman, woman

I don't know why You decided this

The Devil will be very unhappy

And he's taking care of you

Just for me

Just for me

We are here. Welcome back.

-Are they going to be Ok? -I hope so.

Remember: you have the looks, the body and she has nothing.

-Take care. -See you. Thanks.

Call me!

I looked for you.

I stepped off the plane and I looked for you.

And for the first time, you were not there.

This is the first time you are not there...

...to hug me, to kiss me...

...to make love to me.

I'm going to tell you the same words that you told me:

"You are the love of my life...

...do you want to marry me?"

-I don't want to marry you. -What?

-Let me talk. -All you ever do is talk!

It's because I need someone to listen, Carlos!

I need to say how I feel and what's going on with me.

The day you left I hit a man with my car.

I lied to you.

She wasn't fat or ugly.

He was wearing a wrestling mask. He took it off.

I saw her.

I saw him.

And something happened. Something that had never happened.

I didn't accept his invitation.

But something inside of me wanted to do it.

I called you to tell you, but you were asleep.

Fate is a bitch.

I ran into her at the bank.

Those things happen because it's written in the stars.

We were robbed.

I had a gun to my head and I wondered what I was doing with my life.

They took our clothes off.

They took my car.

I offered her a ride.

What did you want me to do?

We fucked.

But it was more than that.

I had never cheated on you.

I swear! You know I would never... I had never done that.

-I know this is painful. -But it'd be worse not to tell you.

I realize it'd be a mistake to get married tomorrow.

Because I know you cannot forgive me.

I could forgive you.

You're a scumbag!

You're the love of my life.

I don't understand. I...

How can you compare our relationship to something fleeting?

-How many times have you seen him? -That doesn't matter!

Of course it matters! Love is not an ephemeral dream!

It's not an illusion, but something that you can touch!

That you can look at.

You can feel it. You build it. Not just having the hots!

It's not just the hots!

I'm a woman who can go without sex and you know that!

Well, I'm not that sure.

You are afraid.

This is new and exciting! But new gets old.

Are you going to leave people when that happens?

I'm not sure.

Are you going to throw this away for a dude you don't even know?

-I know him! -You can't know someone in 3 days!

Cut the bullshit, please!

Do you see this face?

Huh?

Had you ever seen this before?

No.

Had you known this in all of these years?

Of course not! This is also new!

Look into my eyes! What do you see?

Touch me! Had you ever felt my skin like this?

Don't get like this, Carlos!

How else could I react?

I feel like I'm dying!

I have a fucking pain on my chest that I hadn't felt before!

Because you'd never been through this.

The jerk said: "You'd never been through this!"

You're right!

I had never been proposed to and then dumped the day before the wedding!

You feel that pain because you'd never loved before!

Ana, you're growing so much!

Some day you will forget me! Great things will come your way!

You love to travel, to discover!

My life is here!

I hope I'll go out and run over the love of my life!

-I don't know if she's the one. -You see?

But I know you are not!

Does he know what your favorite food is?

Has he met your parents and your siblings, Lucia?

Your attitude is very childish.

Childish? You mean realistic, because I love you with the whole package.

Now my family is a package?

Don't be silly! I mean our five years knowing each other.

Five years of understanding, of accepting each other.

Remember all the things that we've built and lived together.

Close your eyes and think about it.

Close your eyes and think about it, goddammit!

Don't yell at me, Carlos!

I've never done anything to hurt you.

-I've always been the best boyfriend. -I know that!

Maybe that's the reason!

I was your first girlfriend.

I think you need to travel, because you don't know how to be alone.

I think this is the first time you have travelled alone.

Carlos, you need to live!

Live, feel, smell!

Screw half the women in Madrid!

Drink as much tequila as you want! Eat, travel!

Stay alone in a bar until you get kicked out.

Don't tell me what I want or what I need.

It's crystal clear for me.

What is that?

My wedding dress.

It doesn't look like one, right? Wait, I'll put on the veil.

Ana...

I asked the designer to make me a dress...

...that wasn't so bridal.

I didn't want to be a picture-perfect bride, the bride you want.

The one you need.

Funny, isn't it?

A bride asking for her wedding dress not to look too bridal.

Jesus, I knew it!

I've always known it.

But you are better at that than me:

Making decisions.

Even though I knew I shouldn't marry you...

...I would have never left you.

Despite your mistakes and mine, I was in love with you.

I would have looked beautiful.

No, I would have looked gorgeous!

Ana, please.

Do you like me?

Ana.

I mean it. Forget about feelings, bitterness and everything.

I want an emotional, carnal, instinctive answer.

Do you like me?

You drive me crazy.

What are you doing?

I'm saying goodbye.

This is yours.

-Can I give you a ride? -I'd rather walk.

Bye.

Do not be surprised If I tell you what you were

An ungrateful person With my poor heart

Because the fire In your beautiful dark eyes

Illuminated the path To another love

Love of my life

My dear love What have you done to me?

That I cannot comfort myself

Without being able to behold you

Since you paid my sincere love So poorly

This is what you'll get: I'II never mention you again

Love of my life

If you stopped loving me

Don't worry

People won't know about that

What's the use of saying That a man changed my fate?

They'll only laugh at me

I'm here. I won't let you go.

Everything is going to be fine.

Are you her?

Excuse me?

No, you're not excused.

I don't understand.

If you understood, you wouldn't have done this.

Do what?

Are you her or not?

Who?

You ran him over!

-I ran over who? -Leon!

So, who are we talking about?

I didn't understand you.

Yes, I ran him over.

-Is something wrong with him? -Yes.

Well, I'm much worse than he is, but yes, he's not Ok.

-I don't get it... Who are you? -I am Ana!

I'm his fianc�e.

Well, l was his fianc�e.

We were getting married tomorrow.

But Leon just sent all to hell for some slut who ran him over.

I can't be rude. People think I'm a lady and I have class.

But I am about to prove otherwise.

No.

I'm going to thank you instead.

I will find a man who loves me...

...and appreciates me the way I deserve.

That's what the jerk said!

After five years of relationship, those were his comforting words.

Do you like my dress?

Do you like it?

My dress?

Do you like my dress?

I'm asking you, do you like my dress?

I'm asking you, do you like my dress?

I'm asking you, do you like my dress?

I didn't know! I swear! I didn't know!

I didn't know!

-I don't believe you. -I swear!

I have no reason to lie to you after what you just told me.

Look at me.

Look at me.

I can't say I wouldn't have done it.

I did it despite loving my boyfriend so much.

And I let him go because of this jerk.

But I've never considered myself smart enough...

...to get away with this.

I can't believe I chose someone else's man.

And yes, I think your dress is gorgeous.

Can we talk?

-Alone? -Sure! I'm leaving now!

I had to ask her if she liked my dress.

And she did like it! He liked it too.

-Sorry, what's your name? -Lucia.

Lucia.

In order to fit in this dress...

...I haven't eaten for a week.

So I'll go home and eat a pint of ice cream...

...while I watch a chick flick.

And I'll cry a couple of hours over you, then I have to call my guests.

You have to call yours to tell them the wedding is off.

Don't expect me to put in a good word for you.

And you won't get your ring back. I'll sell it and throw a party.

A small one. I won't get much for it.

I'm going to celebrate not marrying you.

By then I will have realized this was the best thing for me.

Beware, Leon.

As long as I feel like this...

...I'll devote all my energy to decree...

...that you'll suffer at least as much as I am.

I hope you'll be alone, so your suffering will be worse.

You'll be alone for sure! You don't have a single fucking friend...

...because you are a real jerk!

Lucia...

...if he lied once, he will lie always.

Do you know what I feel like doing?

Taking your eyeballs out and crushing them, asshole!

Good night.

God will punish you I'm leaving

Since that is what you want

Well, look

Now you laugh and play

With all the expectations That I have laid on you

With all the trust That I rested on you

This is for the best

Go, fly like a bird If you are going to be

That man that I've always wanted to see

Although I won't stand By your side

As your woman

I understand you now.

Don't say that. That's not the point.

She'll come back.

-Why do you say that? -Because I know.

I always knew I shouldn't have done it.

My body warned me.

-Lucia, listen... -Why did you lie to me?

Because I knew if I told you, I wouldn't have a chance.

Why not?

I was cheating on the love of my life. Risking everything!

-So was I! -Who did you think you were?

The Horny Stallion?

If things had not worked with me, would you have married that woman?

-I knew I wouldn't marry her. -Well, she didn't!

This is it, chubby.

This is love.

Remember the girl who cried when I taped her? The one who...?

Couldn't talk?

Her name is Bea.

She was having my child. She had a miscarriage and left me.

All I can tell you is: you'll be fine.

I went to the airport to pick Carlos up.

And I told him what happened between me and a total stranger.

And he forgave me.

And I sent everything to hell.

The man that I've loved the most...

...I've wounded him deeply.

You know why?

-Because I'm a whore! -Don't say that.

A woman who screws a manwhore is a whore.

Like a bitch that screws a dog, a she-cat and a tomcat...

...a female monkey and a male monkey, the whole fucking Ark! Like animals!

She'll come back.

-Carlos, I... -I know her well enough.

-Almost like I know you. -Why do you think that?

Because that jerk doesn't know her!

And she doesn't know him! She's a wonderful woman!

-But she's not easy. -The wedding is tomorrow.

I don't care if it's tomorrow, or in three months!

Listen, Carlos...

...if she came back, do you think this could work?

I think this could work.

My goodness! You really are a beast!

I'm really surprised, Leon.

I'm surprised that you can talk...

...that you can conjugate verbs, enunciate your thoughts...

...which are nothing but bullshit.

Unfounded, incoherent.

Asshole!

Well...

I'll tell you something:

You carry your punishment in your name.

I'll go through that door...

...and you'll be alone.

And the woman who loved you...

...was very wise for wishing you bad things.

I hope someone will run over you.

And I hope they will hit and run.

Stress makes you do stupid things.

I'm not saying Lucia is stupid.

She's doing stupid things because she wants to have it all.

-You can't, for Christ's sake! -Tell me about it!

You'll find a girl, better than Andrea and Bea. I'm sure!

I hope you're right.

Like you were about me?

You asked how I would feel if Lucia dumped me a week before the wedding.

You barely missed, it was just a few hours, moron!

I'm sorry.

I didn't see this coming.

I didn't plan this.

"If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans."

I'm sure he's crying a river of tears over me!

-Lucia is at the door, right? -How do you know that?

I know her.

Better than I know you.

-I'll leave you two alone. -Don't go!

Carlos told me you're making a documentary, right?

Can you shoot me?

-But... -Please.

If this doesn't work, you will have some pretty cheesy footage.

Are you shooting?

Yes.

Come on, ask.

Love is?

Love is forgiveness.

Love is reconciliation.

Love is understanding.

Well, I may be a...

...bitch, coming and telling you this and crying...

...and asking for a second chance, but...

...if I had the guts to tell you the stupid thing I did...

...I also want you to hear this from me:

Thank you for all these years you've been with me...

...for transforming me into this woman...

...for becoming such an incredible man.

You made me see things in a different way.

And today, you gave me a life lesson.

Now I have to finish this, so...

I wanted this to be on tape and...

...I wanted Javier, who knows you so well...

...to have something to help to erase...

...the bad memories that you'II have of me.

This way, some day...

...when you watch this video...

...it will make it right.

And...

...you'll know I was really happy.

Thank you.

Will you marry me?

Won't you look at me?

It's bad luck to see the bride before the wedding.

What is love?

Love is...

...the best investment that you can make in your life.

But...

...you need to know the difference: being loved is easy, loving is not.

When you really love someone you become a better person...

...an extraordinary human being.

Nice to meet you.

Can you excuse us for a second?

Did I miss something?

Well, you missed a lot of things. How long have you been together?

-Javier... -Six months.

You got divorced seven months ago! You're fast, Andrea!

It's not my fault that you couldn't get over me.

-You look awful. -You are more beautiful than ever.

-What? -We are being sponsored...

...by a tequila from Celaya, would you like to try it?

-Can you excuse us? -Are you sure?

-Yes. Go with him. -With her.

Yes, with her. Sorry.

-Sure? -Yes, just one minute.

You're a darling! Come this way, please! Thank you.

This way, please.

What do you want?

You know what, Andrea?

I don't have to hide from you.

I didn't have to run away, you were at fault, you gold digging bitch!

Hey, I'm only guilty of telling you...

...I didn't love you anymore.

And I'm sure you loved that nauseating fat boss of yours!

Yuck! You reek of alcohol! Stop drinking!

Are you bossing me around? What else, Little Miss Perfection?

There's a lot that you must do.

Cut your hair, shave this homeless guy beard...

...get a ticket and go back to Madrid...

...or else I will follow you.

-You are... -It was really good seeing you.

It was, right?

To hear exactly those words.

-You know what, Andrea? -What?

This is closure for me.

-Lucia, it's time for the first dance. -Hold on a second, please.

Where are you?

-I'm busy. -It's time for the first dance.

Do your best! Don't make a fool of yourself!

You won't see me?

Lucia, I'm busy!

I'm stuck in the elevator...

...with a man who says he's going to screw my brains out!

But maybe I will make it.

You're a slut!

I'll hurry, but if I take longer, God willing...

...distract Andrea, so that she won't miss her boyfriend.

Shut up! You are with him?

If she's a bitch, I'm a bitch and a half!

Love you. Impress them, dear!

Jesus!

Good evening.

Love you, dumbass!

Wearing my heart upon my sleeve

I want to tell you with this song

That you are my life

I don't love anyone but you

Wearing my heart upon my sleeve

I want to tell you with this song

That you are my heaven

The birds that sweep the sky

That I breath the air

That I breath the air

That I breath the air That you breath

You're a hopeless case

Hello.

You're a hopeless case, You are the love of my life

Wearing my heart upon my sleeve

I want to sing you a song

That you are my heaven

You are my comfort

That I breath the air

That I breath the air

That I breath the air That you breath

Titanic step!

Love of my life

You are my paradise

-Are you going to be fine? -I'll be super fine!

-Send me a copy of the documentary. -Do you want to see it?

It'll be a pleasure!

-I love you, buddy! -I love you too.

MY SWEETHEART

Hello, this is Runaway Ana.

I won't be available any time soon.

Yes, the wedding is off. And yes, it was his decision.

I'll be fine. I promised my mom that, she's always supportive.

Don't send your condolences, nobody died.

Actually, my therapist forbade me to utter his name.

So, the guy who dumped me is more alive that ever, being a jerk.

I'll take this as a second chance, so thanks for calling.

If your call is to ask about your wedding present...

...don't worry, we'll send it back.

If you want to say something else, leave your message after the tone.

Oh my God! I can't believe it!

Mariana?

-No! -I'm joking! Ana!

-What a coincidence! -Fortuitous, indeed.

-I don't know the difference. -Neither do I.

Are you going back so soon?

I could ask you the same. Did you get married?

Well... Look at me and repeat your question.

Did you get married?

What do you think?

Remember what I said I'd do if you didn't marry that jerk?

-Yep. -What?

Ask me out for coffee.

May I help you?

Two coffees, please.