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1
00:00:02,485 --> 00:00:04,453
[Laughter]
2
00:00:05,888 --> 00:00:09,391
Yeah, and then he was like,
"I will look for you.
3
00:00:09,393 --> 00:00:11,393
"I will find you.
4
00:00:11,395 --> 00:00:13,495
And I will 'kall' you."
5
00:00:13,497 --> 00:00:14,730
That is such a good
Liam Neeson.
6
00:00:14,732 --> 00:00:15,732
Thank you.
7
00:00:15,733 --> 00:00:16,732
If he were
a drunk leprechaun.
8
00:00:16,734 --> 00:00:17,734
Hey!
9
00:00:17,735 --> 00:00:19,635
You could not do
better than that.
10
00:00:19,637 --> 00:00:20,969
I will look for you.
11
00:00:20,971 --> 00:00:22,738
Oh. Oh.
12
00:00:22,740 --> 00:00:24,406
I will find you.
13
00:00:25,842 --> 00:00:26,842
And I will kill you!
14
00:00:26,844 --> 00:00:27,844
Oh!
15
00:00:27,845 --> 00:00:29,845
Oh, hi, Fiona.
16
00:00:29,847 --> 00:00:31,313
I'm so sorry.
17
00:00:31,315 --> 00:00:32,714
We just saw this movie
18
00:00:32,716 --> 00:00:35,550
where Liam Neeson, like,
kills an entire country
19
00:00:35,552 --> 00:00:36,652
with his bare hands.
20
00:00:36,654 --> 00:00:38,320
Don't even bother explaining.
21
00:00:38,322 --> 00:00:39,588
She doesn't like anything
that's fun and violent.
22
00:00:39,590 --> 00:00:40,756
Hey, we got a single malt
23
00:00:40,758 --> 00:00:42,591
calling our name in there,
so let's go.
24
00:00:42,593 --> 00:00:44,593
Hey, no, I live alone.
25
00:00:44,595 --> 00:00:47,617
I know what's it like to have to
take out the trash by yourself at night.
26
00:00:47,642 --> 00:00:50,365
Well, this is actually compost
going in the worm hole, Liz.
27
00:00:50,367 --> 00:00:52,601
But thank you.
Point applies.
28
00:00:52,603 --> 00:00:55,671
Nice to have an empathetic
person around, Will, a human.
29
00:00:55,673 --> 00:00:57,372
You know what has made me
feel safer?
30
00:00:57,374 --> 00:00:58,507
Krav Maga.
31
00:00:58,509 --> 00:01:00,776
Yeah, it's Israeli
self-defense training.
32
00:01:00,778 --> 00:01:02,377
It's very empowering.
33
00:01:02,379 --> 00:01:04,346
Do you know, my friend Moishe
on the kibbutz,
34
00:01:04,348 --> 00:01:06,415
he was always trying to get me
to try Krav Maga,
35
00:01:06,417 --> 00:01:08,583
but I was always too busy
making the babka.
36
00:01:08,585 --> 00:01:10,352
You know, you could
come with me.
37
00:01:10,354 --> 00:01:11,356
Yeah. That'll be fun.
38
00:01:11,381 --> 00:01:13,455
I'll text you.
Will has your deets, right?
39
00:01:13,457 --> 00:01:14,823
(Will) Yeah, totally.
I got her deets.
40
00:01:14,825 --> 00:01:15,825
And I'll get those to you.
41
00:01:15,826 --> 00:01:17,025
You go get comfy.
42
00:01:17,027 --> 00:01:19,728
I'll go get those to you
right away, all right?
43
00:01:19,730 --> 00:01:20,862
Get cozy.
44
00:01:20,864 --> 00:01:22,030
Back off, babka.
45
00:01:22,032 --> 00:01:23,032
What?
46
00:01:23,033 --> 00:01:24,041
I like that girl very much,
47
00:01:24,066 --> 00:01:25,834
and any time you get
near someone that I like,
48
00:01:25,836 --> 00:01:26,836
bad things happen.
49
00:01:26,837 --> 00:01:28,054
But I happen to like her,
50
00:01:28,079 --> 00:01:30,439
and despite her very
questionable taste in men,
51
00:01:30,441 --> 00:01:31,641
I'm going to hang out
with her.
52
00:01:31,642 --> 00:01:33,542
She's nice. So I'll give her
my deets myself.
53
00:01:33,544 --> 00:01:35,677
Fine, but if you
figure out a way,
54
00:01:35,679 --> 00:01:38,580
with your weird compost voodoo,
to ruin what I have going
55
00:01:38,582 --> 00:01:40,015
with that adorable girl
in there,
56
00:01:40,017 --> 00:01:42,017
I will look for ye.
57
00:01:42,019 --> 00:01:44,653
I will find ye.
58
00:01:44,655 --> 00:01:46,054
And I will kill ye.
59
00:01:46,056 --> 00:01:48,090
God, you sound like
the Lucky Charms fellow.
60
00:01:48,092 --> 00:01:49,558
That was perfect Liam Neeson.
61
00:01:49,560 --> 00:01:50,560
You know it!
62
00:01:50,561 --> 00:01:55,397
[Brett Dennen's Comeback Kid(That's My Dog)]
63
00:01:55,399 --> 00:01:57,833
Well, maybe
it's the common curse
64
00:01:57,835 --> 00:02:01,403
Maybe things get bad
before they get worse
65
00:02:01,405 --> 00:02:03,105
I don't want
to become someone
66
00:02:03,107 --> 00:02:06,875
Who can't live up
to what I already done, don't
67
00:02:06,877 --> 00:02:08,543
Here comes a comeback
68
00:02:08,545 --> 00:02:11,113
The kid is back,
is back on track
69
00:02:11,115 --> 00:02:14,116
And there goes my hero
70
00:02:14,118 --> 00:02:17,019
He's the underdog,
he's coming out on top, and
71
00:02:17,021 --> 00:02:20,622
Sync & corrections by Alice
www.addic7ed.com
72
00:02:20,624 --> 00:02:23,024
What is this chaos
on the screen, buddy?
73
00:02:23,026 --> 00:02:25,026
My last text exchange
with Shea.
74
00:02:25,028 --> 00:02:27,996
I sent her
heart, heart, flame,
75
00:02:27,998 --> 00:02:28,998
winky face, winky face,
76
00:02:28,999 --> 00:02:31,466
sumo wrestler, obviously,
heart.
77
00:02:31,468 --> 00:02:32,567
Right, okay.
78
00:02:32,569 --> 00:02:34,469
And she sent me...
79
00:02:34,471 --> 00:02:35,471
Skull.
80
00:02:35,472 --> 00:02:36,638
Oh, that's what that is.
81
00:02:36,640 --> 00:02:38,875
The point is, our emoji trade
deficit is at record levels here.
82
00:02:38,876 --> 00:02:40,475
Okay, that's not a thing.
83
00:02:40,477 --> 00:02:41,610
Sure, it is.
84
00:02:41,612 --> 00:02:44,613
That initial frisson
we first felt
85
00:02:44,615 --> 00:02:46,915
when we came together,
it's fading, Will.
86
00:02:46,917 --> 00:02:47,959
Here's the deal:
87
00:02:47,984 --> 00:02:51,086
You just need to take Shea
on a great date, okay?
88
00:02:51,088 --> 00:02:52,788
The best date I ever went on,
89
00:02:52,790 --> 00:02:55,023
when Sam and I just really
started to connect,
90
00:02:55,025 --> 00:02:56,351
we walked by this fountain,
91
00:02:56,376 --> 00:02:58,660
and we ended up liberating
these pedal boats.
92
00:02:58,662 --> 00:02:59,662
Pedal boats!
93
00:02:59,663 --> 00:03:01,430
Is there no end
to your genius?
94
00:03:01,432 --> 00:03:02,432
No end.
95
00:03:02,433 --> 00:03:03,799
It's the perfect plan.
96
00:03:03,801 --> 00:03:06,735
I'm going to pedal up
the romance with Shea,
97
00:03:06,737 --> 00:03:08,036
and you're coming along
to help.
98
00:03:08,038 --> 00:03:10,505
Oh, no, no, no, no, no,
chaperoning and romance
99
00:03:10,507 --> 00:03:12,474
do not go hand-in-hand,
my friend.
100
00:03:12,476 --> 00:03:14,042
Well, neither do romance
and drowning.
101
00:03:14,044 --> 00:03:15,044
I need you there, Will.
102
00:03:15,045 --> 00:03:16,545
I swim like a stone.
103
00:03:16,547 --> 00:03:18,713
- I'm already texting Shea.
- Oh, boy.
104
00:03:18,715 --> 00:03:19,715
Okay, just be honest
105
00:03:19,716 --> 00:03:20,982
- with me here.
- Mm-Hmm.
106
00:03:20,984 --> 00:03:22,751
Is 16 winky faces too much?
107
00:03:22,753 --> 00:03:23,753
- Yes.
- You're right.
108
00:03:23,754 --> 00:03:25,687
- 17 it is.
- Okay.
109
00:03:26,923 --> 00:03:28,223
- Hey.
- Hi.
110
00:03:28,225 --> 00:03:30,892
So I have a favor...
111
00:03:30,894 --> 00:03:33,562
- Ooh!
- To ask you,
112
00:03:33,564 --> 00:03:36,798
and it's annoying and lame,
and I'm really sorry.
113
00:03:36,800 --> 00:03:38,467
Wow, annoying and lame.
114
00:03:38,469 --> 00:03:40,469
Are you trying
to drive me wild with desire?
115
00:03:40,471 --> 00:03:41,603
[Laughs]
116
00:03:41,605 --> 00:03:43,772
Can you pick Clay up
after practice
117
00:03:43,774 --> 00:03:46,956
and just, like, hang out with him
for a couple of hours?
118
00:03:46,981 --> 00:03:49,110
Oh, uh, I would absolutely
love to.
119
00:03:49,112 --> 00:03:52,814
I'm chaperoning Marcus
on a date.
120
00:03:52,816 --> 00:03:53,849
It's so important to him.
121
00:03:53,851 --> 00:03:54,851
It's gonna be funny.
122
00:03:54,852 --> 00:03:56,551
Here you go.
123
00:03:58,154 --> 00:04:02,224
Okay, I don't want to be
that girlfriend, but...
124
00:04:02,226 --> 00:04:04,259
Earlier, you got
a little weird
125
00:04:04,261 --> 00:04:07,062
when Fiona and I were talking
about hanging out.
126
00:04:07,064 --> 00:04:08,263
And now you're picking
her kid's thing
127
00:04:08,265 --> 00:04:09,564
over my kid's thing.
128
00:04:09,566 --> 00:04:10,966
Whoa, whoa, wait.
Hold on.
129
00:04:10,968 --> 00:04:11,968
Hold on a second.
130
00:04:11,969 --> 00:04:13,635
Well, I mean,
you have to admit
131
00:04:13,637 --> 00:04:15,003
you guys do have kind of a--
132
00:04:15,005 --> 00:04:17,739
[laughs]
It's a strange relationship.
133
00:04:17,741 --> 00:04:19,808
No, she's strange.
I'll give you that.
134
00:04:19,810 --> 00:04:21,510
No, but she and I
are totally normal.
135
00:04:21,512 --> 00:04:23,111
Hey, can you do me up?
136
00:04:23,113 --> 00:04:24,679
Oh, my God,
137
00:04:24,681 --> 00:04:27,549
did Kofi annan come out
with a women's line of clothing?
138
00:04:27,551 --> 00:04:29,150
Zip it, J.Crew.
Literally.
139
00:04:29,152 --> 00:04:30,285
Hello, Liz!
140
00:04:30,287 --> 00:04:31,887
Looking forward
to our Krav Maga sesh.
141
00:04:31,889 --> 00:04:33,822
Have you seen my moccasins?
142
00:04:33,824 --> 00:04:34,856
Pointy toe or round toe?
143
00:04:34,858 --> 00:04:35,858
Pointy.
144
00:04:35,859 --> 00:04:36,925
(Will)
Oh, they're hideous.
145
00:04:36,927 --> 00:04:37,993
Yeah, they're under
your couch.
146
00:04:37,995 --> 00:04:40,762
(Fiona)
You liked them before.
147
00:04:40,764 --> 00:04:41,863
[Door thuds closed]
148
00:04:45,568 --> 00:04:47,569
What time would you like me
to pick Clay up?
149
00:04:47,571 --> 00:04:48,570
- 2:30.
- That's perfect for me.
150
00:04:48,572 --> 00:04:53,174
All right, how is having
your girlfriend's son on my date
151
00:04:53,176 --> 00:04:54,643
a good thing?
152
00:04:54,645 --> 00:04:56,244
Listen, I can't be
a third wheel, all right?
153
00:04:56,246 --> 00:04:58,713
You need a fourth wheel
to balance the vehicle.
154
00:04:58,715 --> 00:05:01,316
Balance the vehicle?
Is that a thing?
155
00:05:01,318 --> 00:05:03,051
No, not really,
but just trust me.
156
00:05:03,053 --> 00:05:04,733
Don't worry. You won't
even know he's here.
157
00:05:06,323 --> 00:05:07,482
Ahoy!
158
00:05:07,507 --> 00:05:10,959
Me and my lady seek
your fittest plastic vessel.
159
00:05:10,961 --> 00:05:12,627
This one should suffice.
160
00:05:12,629 --> 00:05:14,296
Be she polished
and seaworthy?
161
00:05:14,298 --> 00:05:17,032
She be 10 bucks, no refunds.
162
00:05:17,034 --> 00:05:20,168
Wait, life vests optional?
163
00:05:20,170 --> 00:05:22,637
Who wouldn't take an option
that could save your life?
164
00:05:22,639 --> 00:05:24,306
Actually, I'm--I'm good.
165
00:05:24,308 --> 00:05:25,740
(Clay)
Yeah, it's, like,
166
00:05:25,742 --> 00:05:27,075
2 feet deep out here,
all right, Marvin?
167
00:05:27,077 --> 00:05:28,310
I think you're gonna be okay.
168
00:05:28,312 --> 00:05:29,811
All right, first,
it's Marcus.
169
00:05:29,813 --> 00:05:32,814
And second of all,
you obviously haven't read
170
00:05:32,816 --> 00:05:34,749
the same safety blogs
my mom and I do.
171
00:05:34,751 --> 00:05:35,838
All right guys, listen up.
172
00:05:35,863 --> 00:05:38,053
There ain't no shame
in the safety game, all right?
173
00:05:38,055 --> 00:05:39,754
Dude wants a vest,
he's going to get a vest.
174
00:05:39,756 --> 00:05:41,656
[Sighs]
175
00:05:41,658 --> 00:05:43,158
You look like
a woman's small.
176
00:05:43,160 --> 00:05:44,926
Those are out back.
177
00:05:44,928 --> 00:05:47,862
I will return
in the blink of an eye.
178
00:05:56,172 --> 00:05:57,772
So what are you listening to?
179
00:05:57,774 --> 00:05:59,007
He can't hear
a word you're saying.
180
00:05:59,009 --> 00:06:00,241
Don't even bother
asking questions.
181
00:06:00,243 --> 00:06:01,710
Just stare out at the water.
182
00:06:01,712 --> 00:06:03,612
Actually, it's these guys,
4Cain.
183
00:06:03,614 --> 00:06:04,646
No one really knows them,
though.
184
00:06:04,648 --> 00:06:06,881
Really?
185
00:06:08,250 --> 00:06:09,384
Wait, when'd you get that?
186
00:06:09,386 --> 00:06:10,986
Oh, today with a Sharpie,
187
00:06:10,988 --> 00:06:12,287
but if I can save up enough,
188
00:06:12,289 --> 00:06:13,722
then I'm gonna get it
for real.
189
00:06:13,724 --> 00:06:15,256
Oh, you should go to my guy.
He's the best.
190
00:06:15,258 --> 00:06:17,659
Hey, just put your shirt down.
What's wrong with you?
191
00:06:17,661 --> 00:06:18,793
Marcus is about to come back--
192
00:06:18,795 --> 00:06:19,995
Are you two lovebirds
going in or not?
193
00:06:19,997 --> 00:06:21,329
They're not lovebirds.
They just met.
194
00:06:21,331 --> 00:06:22,191
They're not together.
195
00:06:22,216 --> 00:06:24,199
Actually, we have a class
together-- world civ.
196
00:06:24,201 --> 00:06:26,668
- She never shows up, so I--
- Hey, hey, hey.
197
00:06:26,670 --> 00:06:27,869
He's not writing
a book about you.
198
00:06:27,871 --> 00:06:28,903
I don't care what you are.
199
00:06:28,905 --> 00:06:30,271
You're holding up my line.
200
00:06:30,273 --> 00:06:31,339
Oh, sir, no.
Wait, hold on.
201
00:06:31,341 --> 00:06:32,807
Marcus, Marcus!
202
00:06:32,809 --> 00:06:34,643
(Marcus)
Right, who's ready
203
00:06:34,645 --> 00:06:37,779
for a sensible balance
of fun and safety...
204
00:06:37,781 --> 00:06:40,649
Where's my lady going?
205
00:06:40,651 --> 00:06:42,317
All right, you got to look
on the bright side, buddy.
206
00:06:42,319 --> 00:06:44,152
You and I get
to go boating together.
207
00:06:44,154 --> 00:06:45,754
You don't get seasick,
do you?
208
00:06:47,958 --> 00:06:51,660
All right, if Liam Neeson can jump
out of a helicopter into a powerboat,
209
00:06:51,662 --> 00:06:53,128
we should be able to get you
into that thing
210
00:06:53,130 --> 00:06:54,829
if you could just help me out
with a little more pedaling.
211
00:06:54,831 --> 00:06:57,265
Ugh. All right,
one question.
212
00:06:57,267 --> 00:06:59,434
Why is the sky
so cloudy and dark?
213
00:06:59,436 --> 00:07:01,302
I thought the weather
was clear today.
214
00:07:01,304 --> 00:07:03,238
What are--
215
00:07:03,240 --> 00:07:04,839
- Whoa.
- What?
216
00:07:04,841 --> 00:07:06,708
You are having
a major allergic reaction.
217
00:07:06,710 --> 00:07:08,109
Your meds are back in my car.
218
00:07:08,111 --> 00:07:09,210
It can't be.
219
00:07:09,212 --> 00:07:12,280
I haven't eaten anyhthing since
my gluten-free cereal this morning,
220
00:07:12,282 --> 00:07:13,381
and it's not pollen season yet.
221
00:07:13,383 --> 00:07:16,017
Unless...
222
00:07:16,019 --> 00:07:18,687
Oh, latex.
223
00:07:18,689 --> 00:07:20,055
The devil's fabric!
224
00:07:20,057 --> 00:07:22,057
- Get it off me, Will!
- Whoa! Don't rock the boat!
225
00:07:22,059 --> 00:07:23,299
Get it off
before it's too late!
226
00:07:25,194 --> 00:07:26,194
Ah!
227
00:07:26,196 --> 00:07:27,196
Whoo!
228
00:07:27,197 --> 00:07:28,197
Okay, your turn.
229
00:07:28,198 --> 00:07:29,297
Go ahead.
230
00:07:29,299 --> 00:07:31,399
Just give him a swift kick
to the throat.
231
00:07:31,401 --> 00:07:33,334
Trust me;
This feels amazing.
232
00:07:33,336 --> 00:07:35,870
- You got this.
- Okay, okay.
233
00:07:35,872 --> 00:07:36,872
Beep.
234
00:07:36,873 --> 00:07:38,139
Oh.
235
00:07:38,141 --> 00:07:39,174
I'm not very good at it.
236
00:07:39,176 --> 00:07:40,475
You know what helps me?
237
00:07:40,477 --> 00:07:43,978
If I think of someone
I really despise.
238
00:07:43,980 --> 00:07:46,815
If I tell you who I picture,
do you promise not to judge me?
239
00:07:46,817 --> 00:07:48,216
Oh, yeah.
No, go on. Tell me.
240
00:07:48,218 --> 00:07:49,718
Okay.
241
00:07:49,720 --> 00:07:54,155
It's the mean moms
at school...
242
00:07:55,357 --> 00:07:58,259
Gossiping about
which mom brought
243
00:07:58,261 --> 00:08:01,129
the pepperoni pizza
to the bake sale.
244
00:08:01,131 --> 00:08:02,163
Well, you know what?
245
00:08:02,165 --> 00:08:03,298
That was me,
246
00:08:03,300 --> 00:08:06,801
because I work for a living,
Kaitlin!
247
00:08:06,803 --> 00:08:09,771
I salute you,
fellow warrior mother.
248
00:08:09,773 --> 00:08:10,805
Oh.
249
00:08:10,807 --> 00:08:11,807
Ah, okay.
250
00:08:11,808 --> 00:08:13,708
- Got to work on my fiving.
- Yeah. Let's try that.
251
00:08:13,710 --> 00:08:16,211
I can't believe Will thought
something bad would come
252
00:08:16,213 --> 00:08:17,479
from us hanging out together.
253
00:08:17,481 --> 00:08:19,347
Well, he clearly
knows nothing.
254
00:08:19,349 --> 00:08:21,082
Well, I've been saying that
for a long time,
255
00:08:21,084 --> 00:08:22,951
although he never listens,
obviously.
256
00:08:22,953 --> 00:08:27,088
He's so arrogant and rude
and impossibly vain.
257
00:08:27,090 --> 00:08:31,059
And he never, ever, no matter
how many times I tell him,
258
00:08:31,061 --> 00:08:32,494
recycles!
259
00:08:34,330 --> 00:08:36,231
Anybody else?
260
00:08:36,233 --> 00:08:39,768
(Will) All right, buddy, you're
still in the game here, all right?
261
00:08:39,770 --> 00:08:40,902
You just need to perk up
a little bit.
262
00:08:40,904 --> 00:08:42,470
Get your lady
a soft-serve ice cream,
263
00:08:42,472 --> 00:08:44,239
and take her on a little stroll
around the park.
264
00:08:44,241 --> 00:08:46,074
You know, Will,
I'm beginning to think
265
00:08:46,076 --> 00:08:48,343
you may have given me
the wrong allergy medicine.
266
00:08:48,345 --> 00:08:49,878
No, no, no,
double dose of blue,
267
00:08:49,880 --> 00:08:52,080
just like
your mom's song says.
268
00:08:52,082 --> 00:08:53,882
Red is up, blue is down
269
00:08:53,884 --> 00:08:55,216
Get them wrong,
and you will...
270
00:08:55,218 --> 00:08:56,384
Oh! Frown.
271
00:08:56,386 --> 00:08:57,386
Marcus, are you okay?
272
00:08:57,387 --> 00:08:58,387
Oh, no.
273
00:08:58,388 --> 00:08:59,954
No, he's fine.
Yeah, he's--
274
00:08:59,956 --> 00:09:01,589
(Clay) He looks awful, dude.
He needs a nap.
275
00:09:01,591 --> 00:09:03,291
No, he's just
a little tuckered out
276
00:09:03,493 --> 00:09:05,260
for all the partying
he did last night.
277
00:09:05,262 --> 00:09:06,494
But he told me
he spent last night
278
00:09:06,496 --> 00:09:07,529
learning this new
knitting stitch
279
00:09:07,531 --> 00:09:09,030
called the cable and twist.
280
00:09:09,032 --> 00:09:10,331
Oh, that's not
a knitting stitch.
281
00:09:10,333 --> 00:09:11,900
That's a dance move
from Japan.
282
00:09:11,902 --> 00:09:13,001
It's on YouTube.
283
00:09:13,003 --> 00:09:14,169
I'm surprised
you guys haven't seen it.
284
00:09:14,171 --> 00:09:15,370
You know, the arm thing?
285
00:09:15,372 --> 00:09:16,805
It's like a...
One of those things,
286
00:09:16,807 --> 00:09:17,807
and then--
287
00:09:17,808 --> 00:09:18,573
Marcus!
288
00:09:18,575 --> 00:09:20,108
Yeah, he's fine.
He's fine.
289
00:09:20,110 --> 00:09:22,243
That's the end part
of the dance move,
290
00:09:22,245 --> 00:09:24,463
where you do the kneel.
He was just getting into it.
291
00:09:24,488 --> 00:09:26,548
All right, guys, let's go
get some soft-serve.
292
00:09:26,550 --> 00:09:28,016
Right over there.
They got the good stuff.
293
00:09:28,018 --> 00:09:29,951
Here we go.
294
00:09:29,953 --> 00:09:32,086
Uh, bud, what flavor
are you gonna get?
295
00:09:32,088 --> 00:09:33,955
Blueberry?
Yeah, I like blueberry too.
296
00:09:33,957 --> 00:09:35,590
I'm gonna get chocolate
this time.
297
00:09:40,496 --> 00:09:42,363
Give me that.
You suck.
298
00:09:42,365 --> 00:09:43,965
I do not.
You suck.
299
00:09:43,967 --> 00:09:44,967
No, you suck.
300
00:09:44,968 --> 00:09:46,000
No, you suck.
301
00:09:46,002 --> 00:09:47,335
Hey, hey, hey, guess what.
302
00:09:47,337 --> 00:09:48,870
You both suck, okay?
303
00:09:48,872 --> 00:09:50,171
Time to go, Shea.
304
00:09:52,007 --> 00:09:53,608
Hey, um...
305
00:09:53,610 --> 00:09:55,376
You know, we should
hang out again.
306
00:09:55,378 --> 00:09:56,911
I'll call you.
307
00:10:03,953 --> 00:10:05,987
What was that?
Did you just ask her out?
308
00:10:05,989 --> 00:10:08,556
'Cause she is spoken for
by this awesome little dude
309
00:10:08,558 --> 00:10:10,358
right here.
310
00:10:10,360 --> 00:10:11,960
You know what, Will?
311
00:10:11,962 --> 00:10:13,995
I'm gonna walk home
from here.
312
00:10:13,997 --> 00:10:15,196
Clay, I'm not done with you.
313
00:10:15,198 --> 00:10:17,966
You--hey, don't put
your foot on--
314
00:10:17,968 --> 00:10:19,133
hey, Clay?
315
00:10:19,135 --> 00:10:21,502
Yeah, you keep walking.
316
00:10:25,074 --> 00:10:28,443
Chin up, dude.
317
00:10:28,445 --> 00:10:29,644
Literally, man.
318
00:10:29,646 --> 00:10:31,913
Let's get that thing closed.
319
00:10:34,016 --> 00:10:36,151
I have to say,
you could not be cooler,
320
00:10:36,653 --> 00:10:39,387
especially considering
what's going on
321
00:10:39,389 --> 00:10:42,090
with our kids right now.
322
00:10:42,092 --> 00:10:43,524
What is going on?
323
00:10:43,526 --> 00:10:44,893
Will didn't tell you?
324
00:10:44,895 --> 00:10:46,060
- No.
- Ugh.
325
00:10:46,062 --> 00:10:47,996
Well, apparently,
my son, Clay,
326
00:10:47,998 --> 00:10:49,497
tried to steal
Marcus's girlfriend.
327
00:10:49,499 --> 00:10:51,566
He is such a little monster.
328
00:10:52,935 --> 00:10:54,369
- Did he?
- Yeah.
329
00:10:54,371 --> 00:10:55,670
You know, I bet
Will didn't tell you
330
00:10:55,672 --> 00:10:57,505
because he was afraid
you would, like,
331
00:10:57,507 --> 00:10:58,940
freak out or something.
332
00:10:58,942 --> 00:11:00,508
Why do guys always do that?
333
00:11:00,510 --> 00:11:01,676
It's like just because
we're moms,
334
00:11:01,678 --> 00:11:03,645
we can't be
calm, rational people?
335
00:11:03,647 --> 00:11:04,979
That's ridiculous.
336
00:11:04,981 --> 00:11:06,981
I mean, I do feel really bad,
337
00:11:06,983 --> 00:11:08,483
but what are you gonna do?
338
00:11:08,485 --> 00:11:10,251
Kids will be kids, right?
339
00:11:10,253 --> 00:11:11,386
Unless you want to be
340
00:11:11,388 --> 00:11:13,988
one of those insane
helicopter moms
341
00:11:13,990 --> 00:11:17,959
who is afraid to let her child
feel a moment's disappointment.
342
00:11:17,961 --> 00:11:19,928
- Yeah, God forbid that, though.
- Mm-Hmm.
343
00:11:19,930 --> 00:11:21,629
That would be crazy,
wouldn't it?
344
00:11:21,631 --> 00:11:24,098
I mean, and we're
not crazy, are we?
345
00:11:24,100 --> 00:11:25,100
[Chuckles]
346
00:11:25,101 --> 00:11:26,167
Are we?
347
00:11:33,375 --> 00:11:36,077
Coffee, please.
Thank you.
348
00:11:36,079 --> 00:11:38,046
Oh, hey, Shea.
349
00:11:38,048 --> 00:11:39,614
Hey, I have homework to do,
350
00:11:39,616 --> 00:11:41,616
so I'm not really
in the mood to talk.
351
00:11:41,618 --> 00:11:43,952
Oh, me neither.
I hate talking.
352
00:11:43,954 --> 00:11:45,653
No... I'm just here
for the coffee.
353
00:11:45,655 --> 00:11:47,221
I love it here.
354
00:11:47,223 --> 00:11:49,457
Really?
Coffee's terrible here.
355
00:11:49,459 --> 00:11:51,626
All right, fine, look.
356
00:11:51,628 --> 00:11:56,631
Shea, I'm here to stop you
from making a huge mistake.
357
00:11:59,368 --> 00:12:01,069
You don't know
what you're talking about.
358
00:12:01,071 --> 00:12:02,470
Shea, let me just--
359
00:12:02,472 --> 00:12:04,072
just answer me
one question, okay?
360
00:12:04,074 --> 00:12:06,574
What does this--what does
this Clay kid have
361
00:12:06,576 --> 00:12:08,977
that Marcus doesn't?
362
00:12:08,979 --> 00:12:12,046
I--I don't know.
363
00:12:12,048 --> 00:12:16,317
It's just, he's into
all the same stuff that I am.
364
00:12:16,319 --> 00:12:18,519
And...
365
00:12:18,521 --> 00:12:21,255
Marcus is--he's just
still such a kid.
366
00:12:21,257 --> 00:12:22,557
Yeah, I mean, I hear you.
I hear you.
367
00:12:22,559 --> 00:12:25,460
You know, he may be
on the sheltered side.
368
00:12:25,462 --> 00:12:28,296
You know, and he may still
occasionally nap with a blankie.
369
00:12:28,298 --> 00:12:29,530
He naps with a blankie?
370
00:12:29,532 --> 00:12:31,733
Scratch that.
I never said that, okay?
371
00:12:31,735 --> 00:12:34,102
Look, there are so many
cooler guys in the world
372
00:12:34,104 --> 00:12:36,004
than Marcus, all right?
373
00:12:36,006 --> 00:12:40,541
But, Shea, there is no one
374
00:12:40,543 --> 00:12:46,180
with a bigger, sweeter heart
375
00:12:46,182 --> 00:12:52,320
and a goofier, braver spirit
than Marcus.
376
00:12:52,322 --> 00:12:54,422
And I will take that
377
00:12:54,424 --> 00:12:57,725
over that polished act
Clay's got any day.
378
00:13:03,298 --> 00:13:04,432
(Fiona)
Um, excuse me.
379
00:13:04,434 --> 00:13:06,234
[Loud music in headphones]
380
00:13:06,236 --> 00:13:07,769
Oi!
381
00:13:09,605 --> 00:13:11,105
Those precious to you,
are they?
382
00:13:11,107 --> 00:13:12,473
Uh, yeah.
383
00:13:12,475 --> 00:13:15,276
Well, I'd like you to imagine
what it would feel like
384
00:13:15,278 --> 00:13:17,445
to have something
that you cared about deeply
385
00:13:17,447 --> 00:13:19,047
ripped out of your hands,
386
00:13:19,049 --> 00:13:20,748
'cause then you'll understand
how my son feels.
387
00:13:20,750 --> 00:13:24,485
Okay, look, Mrs...
Will's neighbor.
388
00:13:24,487 --> 00:13:27,388
Um, I didn't rip
anyone away, okay?
389
00:13:27,390 --> 00:13:30,558
I'm not sure you get
how liking someone works.
390
00:13:30,560 --> 00:13:32,060
Oh, you're not sure
I get that.
391
00:13:32,062 --> 00:13:34,362
Mm-Hmm. Well.
[Clears throat]
392
00:13:34,364 --> 00:13:36,431
I would just like you
to consider
393
00:13:36,433 --> 00:13:38,800
the karmic implications
of your actions,
394
00:13:38,802 --> 00:13:41,069
because did you know
the Buddha teaches
395
00:13:41,071 --> 00:13:44,739
that for every selfish act,
a seed of pain is planted
396
00:13:44,741 --> 00:13:47,675
inside your consciousness
that will one day blossom
397
00:13:47,677 --> 00:13:49,677
into a great big tree
of suffering?
398
00:13:49,679 --> 00:13:52,346
Uh, yeah, my tree's good.
399
00:13:52,348 --> 00:13:53,714
Really?
400
00:13:53,716 --> 00:13:55,750
[Muttering]
...You're not having those...
401
00:13:55,752 --> 00:13:58,119
Those are mine.
Give those back.
402
00:13:58,121 --> 00:13:59,754
Promise me that you won't
steal Shea. Promise!
403
00:13:59,756 --> 00:14:00,822
You're crazy.
404
00:14:00,824 --> 00:14:02,723
I have not begun
to bring the crazy.
405
00:14:02,725 --> 00:14:05,426
Basketball's not
your sport, is it?
406
00:14:08,530 --> 00:14:10,398
Ladies.
407
00:14:16,438 --> 00:14:18,139
Hey, we have a situation.
408
00:14:18,141 --> 00:14:19,540
Oh, yeah, we have
a situation.
409
00:14:19,542 --> 00:14:21,509
You allowed
your girlfriend's son
410
00:14:21,511 --> 00:14:23,878
to ruin Marcus's date
and probably his life.
411
00:14:23,880 --> 00:14:25,346
Okay, the important thing is,
412
00:14:25,348 --> 00:14:26,547
I am doing something
about it, all right?
413
00:14:26,549 --> 00:14:27,615
Well, I'm doing something
about it.
414
00:14:27,617 --> 00:14:28,616
I've done something about it.
415
00:14:28,618 --> 00:14:29,684
[Knocking at door]
Bloody hell.
416
00:14:29,686 --> 00:14:30,686
Listen, stay right there.
417
00:14:30,687 --> 00:14:32,320
I am not done with you.
418
00:14:32,322 --> 00:14:34,856
[Knocking continues]
419
00:14:34,858 --> 00:14:36,290
- [Groans]
- Hi.
420
00:14:36,292 --> 00:14:37,325
What were you thinking,
421
00:14:37,327 --> 00:14:38,526
accosting my kid
at school today?
422
00:14:38,528 --> 00:14:40,128
I didn't accost him.
423
00:14:40,130 --> 00:14:41,518
We were having
a conversation.
424
00:14:41,543 --> 00:14:43,264
- Well, because he told me...
- Oh, come in.
425
00:14:43,266 --> 00:14:45,800
...that you stole his headphones
426
00:14:45,802 --> 00:14:48,836
and then you threatened
to "bring the crazy"?
427
00:14:48,838 --> 00:14:50,371
Yeah, well, that's just
cockney rhyming slang
428
00:14:50,373 --> 00:14:51,405
for... something.
429
00:14:51,407 --> 00:14:54,175
- What? - Well, nothing that
you'd understand, actually.
430
00:14:54,177 --> 00:14:55,543
And you know what?
I did accost him.
431
00:14:55,545 --> 00:14:57,278
I did.
But he started it.
432
00:14:57,280 --> 00:14:59,847
Wow, I cannot believe
I thought you were cool.
433
00:14:59,849 --> 00:15:01,215
I am cool.
434
00:15:01,217 --> 00:15:02,683
Hey, guys,
what are you talking about?
435
00:15:02,685 --> 00:15:04,452
And of course you're here,
436
00:15:04,454 --> 00:15:05,820
at your neighbor's house,
mm-hmm.
437
00:15:05,822 --> 00:15:08,422
Are you aware that she basically
mugged my child today?
438
00:15:08,424 --> 00:15:10,558
What?
I did not mug your child.
439
00:15:10,560 --> 00:15:13,761
I confiscated his headphones,
and he deserved it.
440
00:15:13,763 --> 00:15:15,229
Remember when I was telling you
441
00:15:15,231 --> 00:15:16,697
how whenever you get near
someone I like--
442
00:15:16,699 --> 00:15:18,499
what was it, good things happen
or bad things happen?
443
00:15:18,501 --> 00:15:19,501
I forget.
444
00:15:19,502 --> 00:15:20,968
I was just protecting my son.
445
00:15:20,993 --> 00:15:24,305
Yeah, by butting into something
that had nothing to do with you.
446
00:15:24,307 --> 00:15:27,341
- What? - Kids need to make
their own mistakes, you know.
447
00:15:27,343 --> 00:15:29,343
That's the only way
they learn anything.
448
00:15:29,345 --> 00:15:30,511
Two women,
two parenting styles.
449
00:15:30,513 --> 00:15:33,046
I think we should agree
to disagree and go get some cookies.
450
00:15:33,048 --> 00:15:36,284
that is the most facile,
tiger motherish thing to say.
451
00:15:36,286 --> 00:15:37,718
You know why your son
doesn't need protecting?
452
00:15:37,720 --> 00:15:38,886
- Why?
- 'Cause he's the bully.
453
00:15:38,888 --> 00:15:41,455
Oh, that's interesting,
coming from a woman
454
00:15:41,457 --> 00:15:44,325
who threatens a child
half her size.
455
00:15:44,327 --> 00:15:45,393
Oh, oh, oh!
We're going to do
456
00:15:45,395 --> 00:15:46,694
the tall girl jokes now,
are we?
457
00:15:46,696 --> 00:15:48,629
Well, hey,
if the gigantic shoe fits...
458
00:15:48,631 --> 00:15:49,697
Get ready!
459
00:15:49,699 --> 00:15:51,699
Oh, you watch yourself.
460
00:15:51,701 --> 00:15:53,467
I am a Krav Maga level seven.
461
00:15:53,469 --> 00:15:54,869
Well, I am a mama bear
level eight.
462
00:15:54,871 --> 00:15:56,537
Ladies, ladies, ladies!
463
00:15:56,539 --> 00:15:59,240
As much as I would like
to watch you guys go at it
464
00:15:59,242 --> 00:16:00,474
and tear
each other's clothes off,
465
00:16:00,476 --> 00:16:01,709
just get in there, ah,
466
00:16:01,711 --> 00:16:04,879
I need you to relax
and chill!
467
00:16:07,449 --> 00:16:09,717
- Ooh!
- Oh, my gosh, are you okay?
468
00:16:09,719 --> 00:16:12,220
Yeah, I was trying to tell you
that I talked to Shea
469
00:16:12,222 --> 00:16:13,688
and I think I really may have
gotten through to her.
470
00:16:13,690 --> 00:16:15,690
Well, do you think she'll change
her mind about dumping him?
471
00:16:15,692 --> 00:16:16,626
I do.
472
00:16:16,651 --> 00:16:19,427
Ugh, this is the strangest
relationship ever.
473
00:16:19,429 --> 00:16:21,329
Will, Mom!
474
00:16:21,331 --> 00:16:22,897
Clay's mom.
475
00:16:22,899 --> 00:16:25,266
I don't know what happened
while I was unconscious,
476
00:16:25,268 --> 00:16:26,434
but it must have been
pretty good,
477
00:16:26,436 --> 00:16:27,935
because I just got
a text from Shea
478
00:16:27,937 --> 00:16:29,937
saying,
"We need to talk."
479
00:16:31,707 --> 00:16:33,641
I owe it all to you, Will.
480
00:16:34,921 --> 00:16:36,821
That's what
"we need to talk" means?
481
00:16:36,846 --> 00:16:38,413
Are you sure?
482
00:16:38,715 --> 00:16:40,414
So sorry, buddy.
483
00:16:40,416 --> 00:16:41,949
Look, you know,
all I can say is,
484
00:16:41,951 --> 00:16:44,418
I've been in your shoes,
and it's just--
485
00:16:44,420 --> 00:16:46,254
You've had the girl
you're crazy about
486
00:16:46,256 --> 00:16:47,622
leave you for somebody else?
487
00:16:49,558 --> 00:16:52,426
N-no, not exactly.
488
00:16:52,428 --> 00:16:54,829
But, you know, there have been
things that I've wanted
489
00:16:54,831 --> 00:16:56,831
- that I haven't gotten--
- She's not some new iPhone
490
00:16:56,833 --> 00:16:58,599
there's a waiting list for.
491
00:17:00,302 --> 00:17:06,307
She's my heart and my soul
and...
492
00:17:08,477 --> 00:17:10,645
She's here.
493
00:17:13,882 --> 00:17:16,284
"She walks in beauty,
like the night
494
00:17:16,286 --> 00:17:19,553
"of cloudless climes
and starry skies.
495
00:17:19,555 --> 00:17:22,056
"And all that's best
of dark and bright
496
00:17:22,058 --> 00:17:24,759
meet in her aspect
and her eyes."
497
00:17:24,761 --> 00:17:27,395
That was so beautiful, man.
498
00:17:27,397 --> 00:17:29,430
Is that John Mayer?
499
00:17:29,432 --> 00:17:31,899
Lord Byron,
you handsome dummy.
500
00:17:31,901 --> 00:17:33,601
[Sighs]
501
00:17:33,603 --> 00:17:37,305
Well, I guess this is it.
502
00:17:37,307 --> 00:17:39,573
Got to go have the talk
with her.
503
00:17:39,575 --> 00:17:40,841
Listen.
504
00:17:40,843 --> 00:17:43,344
If you need help,
I'll go down there with you.
505
00:17:43,346 --> 00:17:45,546
No.
506
00:17:45,548 --> 00:17:50,017
I need to do this one on my own.
507
00:17:50,019 --> 00:17:51,419
[Sighs]
508
00:17:54,523 --> 00:17:58,492
Hey, you--you said
you wanted to talk?
509
00:17:58,494 --> 00:18:00,895
FYI, I just found out
what that means.
510
00:18:00,897 --> 00:18:02,496
Yeah, uh...
511
00:18:02,498 --> 00:18:05,866
God, this is so hard.
512
00:18:05,868 --> 00:18:08,536
Have you--have you read
the Fire Be With Me books?
513
00:18:08,538 --> 00:18:09,904
I have not.
514
00:18:09,906 --> 00:18:10,938
Well, um,
515
00:18:10,940 --> 00:18:13,507
there's this sorceress,
Meeha,
516
00:18:13,509 --> 00:18:17,478
and she--she has
this awful decision to make.
517
00:18:17,480 --> 00:18:20,715
She has to choose between Kade,
the man-wolf,
518
00:18:20,717 --> 00:18:22,917
and Soren,
the wind whisperer.
519
00:18:22,919 --> 00:18:25,353
Yeah, I'm just gonna take
a wild guess
520
00:18:25,355 --> 00:18:28,789
that in this analogy,
I am not the man-wolf.
521
00:18:28,791 --> 00:18:30,791
And the thing is,
522
00:18:30,793 --> 00:18:33,094
she really likes
the both of them,
523
00:18:33,096 --> 00:18:35,363
just in different ways.
524
00:18:35,365 --> 00:18:38,799
And she goes back and forth
for, like, hundreds of years.
525
00:18:38,801 --> 00:18:41,435
That's--that's kind of
how I feel.
526
00:18:41,437 --> 00:18:44,405
I like you.
I really do.
527
00:18:44,407 --> 00:18:48,142
But I--I also like
somebody else,
528
00:18:48,144 --> 00:18:50,911
and it's really confusing.
529
00:18:50,913 --> 00:18:52,980
Does that make sense?
530
00:18:52,982 --> 00:18:54,115
Not really.
531
00:18:54,117 --> 00:18:57,518
I mean, you're my favorite.
532
00:18:57,520 --> 00:19:00,087
I'd never go back and forth
about you.
533
00:19:00,089 --> 00:19:03,090
Marcus, that's what makes this
really hard.
534
00:19:03,092 --> 00:19:04,592
You're just so sweet.
535
00:19:04,594 --> 00:19:06,827
I get it.
536
00:19:06,829 --> 00:19:09,730
You don't feel
the same way that I do,
537
00:19:09,732 --> 00:19:12,032
and you feel too bad
about hurting me
538
00:19:12,034 --> 00:19:15,469
to come out and say it,
so I've got to say it for you.
539
00:19:17,873 --> 00:19:20,107
Good-bye, Shea.
540
00:19:20,109 --> 00:19:23,010
It was brief,
but it was beautiful.
541
00:19:23,512 --> 00:19:26,714
Thanks for letting me
get to know you.
542
00:19:27,416 --> 00:19:30,184
You turned out even greater
than I thought you would.
543
00:19:32,621 --> 00:19:35,022
And I thought you'd be
pretty great.
544
00:19:35,024 --> 00:19:38,726
(Man)
When I tried the
545
00:19:38,728 --> 00:19:40,661
search to find
546
00:19:40,663 --> 00:19:44,131
the colors
547
00:19:44,133 --> 00:19:47,134
in your eyes
548
00:19:47,136 --> 00:19:49,036
I lose my mind
549
00:19:49,038 --> 00:19:52,573
in colors
550
00:19:52,575 --> 00:19:55,142
[sobbing]
551
00:19:55,144 --> 00:19:57,178
Oh, darling, I do know
exactly how you feel.
552
00:19:57,180 --> 00:20:00,815
It's like you're in
a tidal wave of heartbreak
553
00:20:00,817 --> 00:20:01,882
that is threatening
to sweep you
554
00:20:01,884 --> 00:20:03,851
into an ocean of grief.
555
00:20:03,853 --> 00:20:06,487
I--I think what your mom
is trying to say is,
556
00:20:06,489 --> 00:20:09,457
you know, you kept
your dignity, man,
557
00:20:09,459 --> 00:20:11,492
and we're just so proud
of you for that.
558
00:20:11,494 --> 00:20:13,928
What good is my dignity?
559
00:20:13,930 --> 00:20:16,831
Can my dignity hold my hand
on my way to school?
560
00:20:16,833 --> 00:20:17,898
[Crying]
No!
561
00:20:17,900 --> 00:20:19,967
Can my dignity kiss me
four times?
562
00:20:19,969 --> 00:20:21,535
No, darling.
563
00:20:21,537 --> 00:20:22,803
You only kissed her
four times?
564
00:20:22,805 --> 00:20:24,505
Would you shut up?
565
00:20:24,507 --> 00:20:26,540
I'm sorry, but he--
he was going out with her
566
00:20:26,542 --> 00:20:27,808
for, like, months.
567
00:20:27,810 --> 00:20:30,478
I may have missed her lips
a couple times,
568
00:20:30,480 --> 00:20:31,745
caught some earlobe instead.
569
00:20:31,747 --> 00:20:34,482
Well, that's still face,
man, so that counts.
570
00:20:34,484 --> 00:20:37,017
You know, Will,
the only beacon of light
571
00:20:37,019 --> 00:20:40,888
shining in the black sea of
despair that is my heart
572
00:20:40,890 --> 00:20:44,725
is knowing that I'm not
the only one who'll be alone.
573
00:20:44,727 --> 00:20:45,893
That's right.
574
00:20:45,895 --> 00:20:47,094
That's a really good way
of looking at it.
575
00:20:47,096 --> 00:20:48,996
Your mom is all alone too.
576
00:20:48,998 --> 00:20:51,632
Yeah, thank you
for bringing that up
577
00:20:51,634 --> 00:20:53,033
right now, Will.
578
00:20:53,035 --> 00:20:54,969
No, I meant you, Will.
579
00:20:54,971 --> 00:20:56,737
As my best friend,
there's no way
580
00:20:56,739 --> 00:20:57,972
you could continue going out
581
00:20:57,974 --> 00:21:00,774
with the mother
of my sworn enemy.
582
00:21:00,776 --> 00:21:02,643
[Crying]
583
00:21:02,645 --> 00:21:04,778
Darling, little bear,
584
00:21:04,780 --> 00:21:07,815
it's all right;
Mummy's here.
585
00:21:07,817 --> 00:21:10,618
I'm gonna go
warm up this tea here.
586
00:21:10,620 --> 00:21:13,087
Nobody wants to stay
at the Heartbreak Hotel,
587
00:21:13,089 --> 00:21:15,222
- darling. - [Sobbing]
_
588
00:21:15,224 --> 00:21:18,926
You don't ever need
a girlfriend, darling.
589
00:21:18,928 --> 00:21:21,795
You've got mummy.
590
00:21:21,797 --> 00:21:23,797
You don't need a girl.
591
00:21:24,321 --> 00:21:28,221
Sync & corrections by Alice
www.addic7ed.com
592
00:21:28,271 --> 00:21:32,821
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
42216
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