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Captioning sponsored by
FOX BROADCASTING COMPANY
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and TWENTIETH CENTURY FOX
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00:00:30,948 --> 00:00:33,610
BOBBY:
Do you really have to go?
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00:00:33,650 --> 00:00:36,085
You're old enough
to be on your own, Bobby.
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00:00:36,119 --> 00:00:37,416
Pretty soon the
baby-sitters
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00:00:37,454 --> 00:00:39,252
are gonna be
younger than you.
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00:00:39,289 --> 00:00:40,381
But... But...
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00:00:40,424 --> 00:00:41,585
Oh, you'll be fine.
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00:00:41,625 --> 00:00:43,184
I've gotten rid
of that hat rack
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00:00:43,227 --> 00:00:44,786
you said looked
like the devil.
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00:00:44,828 --> 00:00:45,920
Have fun.
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00:00:51,969 --> 00:00:54,028
MAN:
A Frankenstein monster?
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00:00:54,071 --> 00:00:55,596
In this day and age?
14
00:00:55,639 --> 00:00:57,471
I'm telling you kids...
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00:00:57,507 --> 00:00:59,100
( screams )
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00:01:04,281 --> 00:01:05,976
HANK:
Chuck Storm
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00:01:06,016 --> 00:01:07,279
on channel five predicts
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00:01:07,317 --> 00:01:09,877
"possible moderate breeze"
for the camping trip.
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00:01:09,920 --> 00:01:11,410
Uh-huh. Mm-hmm.
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00:01:11,455 --> 00:01:14,891
Yep. I don't know how you girls
get along without us every year.
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00:01:14,925 --> 00:01:15,915
Heh-heh-heh.
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00:01:15,959 --> 00:01:17,927
'You know, the French onion soup
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00:01:17,961 --> 00:01:20,328
and the minestrone soup
sound so good,
24
00:01:20,364 --> 00:01:22,230
I think I'm gonna order both.
25
00:01:22,266 --> 00:01:23,495
Two soups?
26
00:01:23,533 --> 00:01:25,228
Yes. In place of an entree.
27
00:01:27,938 --> 00:01:30,430
( Phone rings )
28
00:01:30,474 --> 00:01:31,566
Hello?
29
00:01:31,608 --> 00:01:32,973
Dad...
30
00:01:33,010 --> 00:01:34,569
I crawled into your bed
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00:01:34,611 --> 00:01:37,342
to calm me down, but it
just wasn't the same
32
00:01:37,381 --> 00:01:38,780
without you guys here.
33
00:01:38,815 --> 00:01:41,113
Bobby, everything
would have been fine
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00:01:41,151 --> 00:01:42,585
if you hadn't panicked.
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00:01:42,619 --> 00:01:44,519
The problem is
you lack confidence.
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00:01:44,554 --> 00:01:46,318
Give me confidence.
37
00:01:46,356 --> 00:01:48,916
Well, I can't give it to you,
you have to earn it.
38
00:01:48,959 --> 00:01:51,553
Hey, you know, one
of the best ways to do that
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00:01:51,595 --> 00:01:53,586
is to rely
on yourself in the wild.
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00:01:53,630 --> 00:01:55,325
Just you
against the elements.
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00:01:55,365 --> 00:01:56,662
I don't know...
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00:01:56,700 --> 00:01:58,464
I don't want you to get married
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00:01:58,502 --> 00:02:01,199
and have to have your wife
tuck you in at night.
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00:02:01,238 --> 00:02:03,138
'You're coming
on our camping trip.
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00:02:03,173 --> 00:02:06,370
Fine, but I don't know
what I can learn in the wild
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00:02:06,410 --> 00:02:09,004
that I can't learn
watching Zoobilee Zoo.
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00:02:09,046 --> 00:02:10,844
...and I figure
if we make this
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00:02:10,881 --> 00:02:12,872
an "eat only what
you catch" trip,
49
00:02:12,916 --> 00:02:15,886
Bobby will be forced
to learn some self-reliance.
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00:02:15,919 --> 00:02:17,717
That's a great idea.
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00:02:17,754 --> 00:02:20,189
Once you learn how
to light a cigarette
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00:02:20,223 --> 00:02:22,487
with two rocks, you
feel invincible.
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00:02:22,526 --> 00:02:25,052
Yeah, man, just like my
dang ol' Ted Nugent said, man.
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00:02:25,095 --> 00:02:27,621
'You know, they can't no grill,
'less you kill it man.
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00:02:27,664 --> 00:02:30,031
Like, dang, talking
about an old... foom.
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00:02:30,067 --> 00:02:33,162
Yeah, I use my survival
training every day.
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00:02:33,203 --> 00:02:35,331
Yep, being alone in the woods
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00:02:35,372 --> 00:02:39,240
prepared me for being alone,
well... everywhere else.
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00:02:43,480 --> 00:02:46,040
Oh, I'm gonna
miss Dale, shug.
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00:02:46,083 --> 00:02:48,142
And I will miss my boys,
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00:02:48,185 --> 00:02:49,584
but, you know,
I see this
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00:02:49,619 --> 00:02:51,053
as the perfect
opportunity
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00:02:51,088 --> 00:02:53,386
to take care of this
"things to do" list
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00:02:53,423 --> 00:02:55,448
that has been hanging
over my head.
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00:02:55,492 --> 00:02:56,926
"See boys off."
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00:02:56,960 --> 00:02:58,655
Done.
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00:03:04,701 --> 00:03:06,032
The Park Department
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00:03:06,069 --> 00:03:10,199
is not responsible
for my safety. Oh, God...
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00:03:10,240 --> 00:03:11,207
That's right.
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00:03:11,241 --> 00:03:13,039
'You're responsible now.
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00:03:14,578 --> 00:03:17,775
Oh, already that time
of year again, huh, Hank?
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00:03:17,814 --> 00:03:19,077
Yeah, looks like it.
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00:03:19,116 --> 00:03:20,880
How are you,
Ranger Bradley?
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00:03:20,917 --> 00:03:22,612
Working so hard, I
couldn't tell you.
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00:03:22,652 --> 00:03:23,881
What'll it be-- the usual?
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00:03:23,920 --> 00:03:27,356
Yep, ol' lot number 6347.
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00:03:27,391 --> 00:03:31,259
We watched that possum family
grow up right before our eyes.
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00:03:35,932 --> 00:03:38,128
So how does it feel
to be setting up
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00:03:38,168 --> 00:03:40,136
your own camp
for the first time?
80
00:03:40,170 --> 00:03:42,571
I brushed my teeth
with bug cream
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00:03:42,606 --> 00:03:44,574
and I'm still kinda woozy.
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00:03:44,608 --> 00:03:45,734
Can we go home?
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00:03:45,776 --> 00:03:47,801
No, we've
got work to do.
84
00:03:47,844 --> 00:03:49,903
We gotta pick up dinner.
85
00:03:52,149 --> 00:03:53,583
Come here, fish.
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00:03:53,617 --> 00:03:55,915
I'm not gonna hurt you.
87
00:03:57,487 --> 00:03:58,716
Idiot.
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00:03:58,755 --> 00:04:01,224
That's three for Dale,
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00:04:01,258 --> 00:04:04,125
three for me,
four for Boomhauer.
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00:04:04,161 --> 00:04:06,789
DALE:
And nada for Bobby,
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00:04:06,830 --> 00:04:09,162
and since it's an
"eat only
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00:04:09,199 --> 00:04:10,360
what you catch trip,"
93
00:04:10,400 --> 00:04:12,232
tonight, you will
be dining on...
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00:04:12,269 --> 00:04:15,261
fillet of zero.
95
00:04:15,305 --> 00:04:16,272
( Sighs)
96
00:04:16,306 --> 00:04:18,104
Shut up, Dale.
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00:04:18,141 --> 00:04:19,870
Maybe he's right.
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00:04:19,910 --> 00:04:21,537
I can't do this.
99
00:04:21,578 --> 00:04:22,875
Sure you can, Bobby.
100
00:04:22,913 --> 00:04:24,904
Just remember,
to catch a fish,
101
00:04:24,948 --> 00:04:26,916
you have to think
like a fish.
102
00:04:26,950 --> 00:04:32,184
Hmm, I'm wet,
and I don't even know it.
103
00:04:32,222 --> 00:04:33,417
( Sighs)
104
00:04:33,457 --> 00:04:35,892
No, where would you be feeding?
105
00:04:35,926 --> 00:04:37,155
Probably in that
106
00:04:37,194 --> 00:04:39,322
algae-covered
area over there.
107
00:04:39,362 --> 00:04:42,161
That algae does
look pretty good.
108
00:04:42,199 --> 00:04:44,327
PEGGY:
Nancy, in one day I have
109
00:04:44,367 --> 00:04:46,927
accomplished everything
I set out to do.
110
00:04:46,970 --> 00:04:49,098
Do you think
it would be gilding the lily
111
00:04:49,139 --> 00:04:51,233
to refinance the house
while Hank's away?
112
00:04:51,274 --> 00:04:53,106
Uh-oh, someone's beeping in.
113
00:04:53,143 --> 00:04:54,269
Hello, Peggy. This is
114
00:04:54,311 --> 00:04:55,938
Dora Shelwyn from Tom Landry.
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00:04:55,979 --> 00:04:56,946
I teach...
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00:04:56,980 --> 00:04:57,947
Are you retiring?
117
00:04:57,981 --> 00:04:59,244
Uh, no, actually,
118
00:04:59,282 --> 00:05:01,046
I just needed the number
of your veterinarian.
119
00:05:01,084 --> 00:05:02,176
I have a quick question.
120
00:05:02,219 --> 00:05:03,186
Go ahead.
121
00:05:03,220 --> 00:05:04,585
I meant for the vet.
122
00:05:04,621 --> 00:05:06,817
'You see, I bought
this myna bird,
123
00:05:06,857 --> 00:05:09,019
and it just won't talk and I...
124
00:05:09,059 --> 00:05:10,254
Put the bird on the line.
125
00:05:10,293 --> 00:05:12,193
What?
Trust me, I know what I'm doing.
126
00:05:14,564 --> 00:05:17,727
Okay, bird-- Awk!
I love Dora Shelwyn!
127
00:05:17,767 --> 00:05:18,962
Who's a good bird?
128
00:05:19,002 --> 00:05:20,401
I love Dora Shelwyn!
129
00:05:20,437 --> 00:05:21,734
( Peggy squawks )
130
00:05:21,771 --> 00:05:24,172
Come on, bird. I got all day.
131
00:05:26,243 --> 00:05:28,405
( Birdlike):
Awk! I love Dora Shelwyn!
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00:05:38,922 --> 00:05:39,889
Hey, bro.
133
00:05:39,923 --> 00:05:40,890
What?
134
00:05:40,924 --> 00:05:43,393
Oh, hi.
135
00:05:43,426 --> 00:05:45,895
If you catch anything,
we should use this as a plate.
136
00:05:45,929 --> 00:05:48,330
I haven't even seen
a fish all day
137
00:05:48,365 --> 00:05:49,628
and I'm starving.
138
00:05:49,666 --> 00:05:51,361
I've got a hamburger
bun top.
139
00:05:51,401 --> 00:05:54,166
Still has most
of its sesame seeds.
140
00:05:55,205 --> 00:05:56,331
Bobby.
141
00:05:56,373 --> 00:05:57,636
Don't take that.
142
00:05:57,674 --> 00:06:00,666
It's okay-- we
can split it threezies.
143
00:06:00,710 --> 00:06:02,838
Thank you
for the, uh, bun,
144
00:06:02,879 --> 00:06:05,041
but we are only eating
what we catch this weekend.
145
00:06:05,081 --> 00:06:08,210
I'm trying to teach
my son self-reliance.
146
00:06:08,251 --> 00:06:12,119
No, I'm trying
to teach him self-reliance.
147
00:06:12,155 --> 00:06:12,883
What?
148
00:06:12,923 --> 00:06:14,254
Yeah. The thing
149
00:06:14,291 --> 00:06:17,921
about self-reliance
is... it's like, bad.
150
00:06:17,961 --> 00:06:19,520
Hugs for smokes.
151
00:06:19,563 --> 00:06:20,724
Look, I...
152
00:06:20,764 --> 00:06:23,165
oh, God.
153
00:06:24,100 --> 00:06:25,864
Another one?
154
00:06:25,902 --> 00:06:27,666
Okay, I don't know
what's going on,
155
00:06:27,704 --> 00:06:30,935
but you're gonna have to tell
your friends to get out of here.
156
00:06:30,974 --> 00:06:32,408
All of them?
157
00:06:38,748 --> 00:06:40,739
What are they, Dad?
158
00:06:40,784 --> 00:06:42,218
( Sighs)
159
00:06:42,252 --> 00:06:44,152
They're hippies, son.
160
00:06:45,922 --> 00:06:48,482
I love you!
161
00:06:53,663 --> 00:06:56,155
BOOMHAUER: Hey, man, I
thought that dang ol' Reagan
162
00:06:56,199 --> 00:06:58,896
got rid of all them in the 'ol
'80s, man, talkin' "bout
163
00:06:58,935 --> 00:07:00,767
them yippy
to yuppy, man.
164
00:07:00,804 --> 00:07:02,465
This land is our land!
165
00:07:02,505 --> 00:07:04,166
Welcome home,
friend!
166
00:07:04,207 --> 00:07:05,174
( Shrieks )
167
00:07:05,208 --> 00:07:06,505
Bobby, back in the tent!
168
00:07:06,543 --> 00:07:07,704
Go away!
169
00:07:07,744 --> 00:07:09,269
And put on some clothes!
170
00:07:09,312 --> 00:07:11,508
Hey, this isn't Kinko's, man.
171
00:07:11,548 --> 00:07:12,982
It's the Gathering!
172
00:07:13,016 --> 00:07:13,915
The what?
173
00:07:13,950 --> 00:07:15,782
The Gathering, bro.
174
00:07:15,819 --> 00:07:17,150
Everyone's here.
175
00:07:17,187 --> 00:07:18,882
Crunchies,
and hempies,
176
00:07:18,922 --> 00:07:21,118
Earth Mothers, vegans,
hyper-vegans...
177
00:07:21,157 --> 00:07:22,716
We're all here.
178
00:07:22,759 --> 00:07:24,249
Thousands of us.
179
00:07:27,497 --> 00:07:29,761
This may be
the saddest day of my career.
180
00:07:31,301 --> 00:07:32,826
Ranger, how could you
have given
181
00:07:32,869 --> 00:07:34,394
all these people park permits?
182
00:07:34,437 --> 00:07:35,598
What were you thinking?
183
00:07:35,639 --> 00:07:38,267
Sorry, Hank,
we were blind-sided.
184
00:07:38,308 --> 00:07:41,539
They got a bunch of
ACLU lawyers to sue,
185
00:07:41,578 --> 00:07:43,376
saying the First
Amendment allows them
186
00:07:43,413 --> 00:07:45,347
to peaceably assemble
without a permit.
187
00:07:47,017 --> 00:07:48,314
( Groans )
188
00:07:48,351 --> 00:07:50,843
Don't tell me that's covered by
the First Amendment.
189
00:07:50,887 --> 00:07:52,651
Public defecation
is protected
190
00:07:52,689 --> 00:07:54,919
as long as they say
it's a political
191
00:07:54,958 --> 00:07:57,086
or artistic statement.
192
00:07:57,127 --> 00:07:59,221
And they do.
193
00:07:59,262 --> 00:08:03,130
( Bongos and maracas playing )
194
00:08:06,536 --> 00:08:08,402
Nothing again.
195
00:08:08,438 --> 00:08:10,600
We'll never
catch anything.
196
00:08:10,640 --> 00:08:13,974
Fish hate loud hippie
drums and so do I.
197
00:08:14,010 --> 00:08:15,739
Hey, yo!
198
00:08:15,779 --> 00:08:19,511
J Beautiful,
drifting Gypsy man 2
199
00:08:19,549 --> 00:08:22,746
J Collecting
empty soda cans
200
00:08:22,786 --> 00:08:26,518
I He whispered,
"Aflantis is not far away I
201
00:08:26,556 --> 00:08:31,426
I Just travel
on a manta ray." I
202
00:08:31,461 --> 00:08:34,829
That music�- it's beautiful.
203
00:08:34,864 --> 00:08:36,195
Dang it,
if I have to pull
204
00:08:36,232 --> 00:08:37,700
one more
hook out of Bill...
205
00:08:37,734 --> 00:08:38,701
( Bill grunts )
206
00:08:41,371 --> 00:08:43,703
Excuse me, sir, but
I could not help noticing
207
00:08:43,740 --> 00:08:45,333
you're making
your salad wrong.
208
00:08:45,375 --> 00:08:46,536
Where are the beets?
209
00:08:46,576 --> 00:08:47,839
Where are the red beans?
210
00:08:47,877 --> 00:08:48,844
I don't know.
211
00:08:48,878 --> 00:08:50,039
You know what, yeah,
212
00:08:50,080 --> 00:08:51,514
we're just going to
have to start all over.
213
00:08:51,548 --> 00:08:53,539
I made a salad last
night that people
214
00:08:53,583 --> 00:08:54,982
are still talking about.
215
00:08:55,018 --> 00:08:57,385
I mean look at us,
we're talking about it.
216
00:09:01,524 --> 00:09:02,685
Fire wood.
217
00:09:04,227 --> 00:09:05,592
Lognappers!
218
00:09:08,264 --> 00:09:10,198
I'm starving, Dad!
219
00:09:10,233 --> 00:09:13,066
Can't you teach me self-reliance
at a restaurant?
220
00:09:13,103 --> 00:09:15,470
I'll order
off the adult menu.
221
00:09:15,505 --> 00:09:16,734
Now, calm down.
222
00:09:16,773 --> 00:09:18,639
I found some perfectly
good thorn-apples
223
00:09:18,675 --> 00:09:20,734
and sour berries
in the forest.
224
00:09:20,777 --> 00:09:22,211
You go find us
some sticks
225
00:09:22,245 --> 00:09:24,213
and we can roast
them like s'mores.
226
00:09:24,247 --> 00:09:26,807
And do not talk
to any hippies.
227
00:09:42,265 --> 00:09:44,859
My name's Fudgie,
and that's Topaz.
228
00:09:44,901 --> 00:09:46,630
We met on a
turnip farm.
229
00:09:46,669 --> 00:09:47,830
Oh.
230
00:09:47,871 --> 00:09:49,566
Whatcha got in the kettle?
231
00:09:49,606 --> 00:09:51,005
Jumbo Gumbo.
232
00:09:51,040 --> 00:09:53,008
How much does it cost
for a bowl?
233
00:09:53,042 --> 00:09:55,010
Everything here
is free, little guy.
234
00:09:55,044 --> 00:09:57,638
This ain't
the Ronald McMoney scene.
235
00:09:57,680 --> 00:10:00,650
People here share
with one another.
236
00:10:00,683 --> 00:10:04,517
'You give what you can
and you get what you need.
237
00:10:04,554 --> 00:10:06,750
I don't know if I should.
238
00:10:06,790 --> 00:10:10,283
My dad said I can
only eat what I catch.
239
00:10:10,326 --> 00:10:11,794
Then catch.
240
00:10:15,198 --> 00:10:17,394
So you're sure this is okay?
241
00:10:17,433 --> 00:10:20,130
My dad wants me to be
self-reliant.
242
00:10:20,170 --> 00:10:22,264
In a hundred years,
who's going to care
243
00:10:22,305 --> 00:10:24,069
if you were
self-reliant or not?
244
00:10:30,814 --> 00:10:34,341
'You make a good point, Fudgie.
245
00:10:35,752 --> 00:10:37,379
No thank you.
246
00:10:37,420 --> 00:10:39,479
I'll probably catch
a deer tomorrow
247
00:10:39,522 --> 00:10:41,616
and I want to make
sure I'm hungry.
248
00:10:41,658 --> 00:10:43,319
Good for you, Bobby.
249
00:10:43,359 --> 00:10:44,918
You're really
hanging in there.
250
00:10:44,961 --> 00:10:45,928
You know what?
251
00:10:45,962 --> 00:10:47,396
If you can wait,
I can wait.
252
00:10:47,430 --> 00:10:48,898
DALE:
Good-bye, gentlemen,
253
00:10:48,932 --> 00:10:50,297
and good riddance.
254
00:10:50,333 --> 00:10:53,325
I'm one chorus of "Truckin�
away from snapping.
255
00:10:53,369 --> 00:10:56,634
Yeah, man, like that dang ol' mandolin,
man ain't never sounded so bad.
256
00:10:56,673 --> 00:10:59,438
Like a dang ol' Bill Monroe
spinning his dang ol' grave, man.
257
00:10:59,475 --> 00:11:01,842
What? You guys can't
get up and leave now.
258
00:11:01,878 --> 00:11:03,972
What kind of lesson
is that for Bobby?
259
00:11:04,013 --> 00:11:05,139
A good one.
260
00:11:05,181 --> 00:11:06,706
He can learn
from our bad example.
261
00:11:06,749 --> 00:11:09,377
Well, I guess
self-reliance
262
00:11:09,419 --> 00:11:11,751
isn't for
everyone, Dad.
263
00:11:15,692 --> 00:11:18,354
Stellar gumbo, Fudgie,
just stellar.
264
00:11:18,394 --> 00:11:21,227
This time, don't skimp
on the potatoes.
265
00:11:21,264 --> 00:11:22,356
Dig deep.
266
00:11:22,398 --> 00:11:24,662
Sorry, but the gumbo's
gone-bo.
267
00:11:24,701 --> 00:11:27,534
Oh. That's okay.
268
00:11:27,570 --> 00:11:30,369
I should probably be getting
back to my campsite anyway.
269
00:11:30,406 --> 00:11:32,397
Hold on, little guy.
270
00:11:32,442 --> 00:11:33,637
The pot's empty.
271
00:11:33,676 --> 00:11:35,667
It's time
for you to share up.
272
00:11:35,712 --> 00:11:37,908
Uh, I don't have anything.
273
00:11:37,947 --> 00:11:41,713
But in a hundred years,
who's going to care, right?
274
00:11:41,751 --> 00:11:44,516
Fudgie's hungry now.
275
00:11:46,089 --> 00:11:48,148
FUDGIE: ...and then I'm
going to share your cooler.
276
00:11:48,191 --> 00:11:50,523
'You think your dad's got
any money we could share?
277
00:11:53,830 --> 00:11:56,800
Hey, I can trade
these for a burrito.
278
00:11:56,833 --> 00:11:58,665
Wait!
279
00:11:58,701 --> 00:12:00,726
Those are my dad's
fishing poles.
280
00:12:00,770 --> 00:12:01,965
You can't
take those.
281
00:12:02,005 --> 00:12:03,871
We only want to share, guy.
282
00:12:03,907 --> 00:12:06,239
You didn't mind sharing
our gumbo, did you?
283
00:12:06,276 --> 00:12:08,074
No.
284
00:12:08,111 --> 00:12:09,738
So we're sharing back.
285
00:12:09,779 --> 00:12:11,474
It's the law of Karma.
286
00:12:11,514 --> 00:12:13,414
Promise that
you'll bring them back
287
00:12:13,449 --> 00:12:14,883
before my dad gets here.
288
00:12:17,353 --> 00:12:19,048
So we're agreed, right?
289
00:12:19,088 --> 00:12:20,886
You'll bring them back?
290
00:12:22,692 --> 00:12:24,251
Yeah, man, sure.
291
00:12:27,664 --> 00:12:29,257
Still no sign of Bill.
292
00:12:29,299 --> 00:12:31,427
Probably got his head
stuck in something.
293
00:12:31,467 --> 00:12:33,697
But I'm sure he'll turn up
once we start cooking
294
00:12:33,736 --> 00:12:35,226
those fish
we're about to catch.
295
00:12:35,271 --> 00:12:37,000
Actually, I'm
in the mood
296
00:12:37,040 --> 00:12:38,633
for more
thorn berries,
297
00:12:38,675 --> 00:12:40,200
or maybe a pine cone.
298
00:12:40,243 --> 00:12:42,337
Bobby, the fishing rods
are gone!
299
00:12:42,378 --> 00:12:44,642
'You were supposed to be
watching this stuff.
300
00:12:44,681 --> 00:12:48,447
I-I'm sure whoever took them
will bring them right back.
301
00:12:48,484 --> 00:12:51,613
Thieves don't
return stolen items.
302
00:12:51,654 --> 00:12:53,281
It's just a thing, Dad.
303
00:12:53,323 --> 00:12:55,087
They didn't steal
something important,
304
00:12:55,124 --> 00:12:57,354
like a smile, right?
305
00:12:57,393 --> 00:12:59,191
Bobby, that's
just hippie talk,
306
00:12:59,228 --> 00:13:01,390
and all the hippie talk
in the world
307
00:13:01,431 --> 00:13:03,229
isn't going
to get our stuff back.
308
00:13:03,266 --> 00:13:05,963
We have to actually
do something about it.
309
00:13:15,211 --> 00:13:18,670
Excuse me, I'm looking for
a couple of fishing rods.
310
00:13:18,715 --> 00:13:21,514
Dual paddle crank handles,
12-pound lines.
311
00:13:21,551 --> 00:13:23,383
Never mind.
312
00:13:23,419 --> 00:13:26,116
I'm really sorry
to hear about
313
00:13:26,155 --> 00:13:28,283
your fishing poles, man.
314
00:13:28,324 --> 00:13:30,122
Uh... okay.
315
00:13:30,159 --> 00:13:33,094
If anyone can help you,
it's the Council Circle.
316
00:13:33,129 --> 00:13:35,826
There's some real
wise bastards there.
317
00:13:35,865 --> 00:13:38,891
Uh... thanks.
318
00:13:38,935 --> 00:13:41,495
Hey, can you
give me some money?
319
00:13:41,537 --> 00:13:42,504
No.
320
00:13:42,538 --> 00:13:44,006
Fascist.
321
00:13:44,040 --> 00:13:45,667
It's only with teamwork
322
00:13:45,708 --> 00:13:48,268
that we can find Apple-Seed's
missing teeth.
323
00:13:48,311 --> 00:13:49,972
HANK:
Uh, pardon me.
324
00:13:50,013 --> 00:13:52,710
Hank Hill, assistant manager,
Strickland Propane.
325
00:13:52,749 --> 00:13:53,648
Shut up!
326
00:13:53,683 --> 00:13:54,707
Quiet!
327
00:13:54,751 --> 00:13:55,843
What gives you
the right?
328
00:13:55,885 --> 00:13:57,979
BILL: The rules
say you can't speak
329
00:13:58,021 --> 00:14:00,080
unless you got
the feather.
330
00:14:00,123 --> 00:14:02,057
Aw, Bill.
331
00:14:02,091 --> 00:14:03,490
Hey, Hank...
332
00:14:03,526 --> 00:14:06,985
my new name is Energy Turtle.
333
00:14:07,030 --> 00:14:08,828
I've found myself.
334
00:14:08,865 --> 00:14:09,991
Bill, fun's over.
335
00:14:10,033 --> 00:14:12,365
Wash that mud off now,
and help me find
336
00:14:12,402 --> 00:14:13,699
my fishing rods.
337
00:14:13,736 --> 00:14:14,965
Oh, Hank.
338
00:14:15,004 --> 00:14:17,905
I bet you searched
for them everywhere...
339
00:14:17,940 --> 00:14:19,271
except your heart.
340
00:14:19,308 --> 00:14:20,742
Get out of
the Circle!
341
00:14:20,777 --> 00:14:21,938
He's serious.
342
00:14:21,978 --> 00:14:23,946
No Being may speak
without the feather.
343
00:14:23,980 --> 00:14:25,573
Okay! Where are
my fishing rods?
344
00:14:25,615 --> 00:14:27,014
Hey, why'd you come
345
00:14:27,050 --> 00:14:29,348
to a Gathering
if you didn't want to share?!
346
00:14:29,385 --> 00:14:32,548
I didn't come to the Gathering!
The Gathering came to me!
347
00:14:32,588 --> 00:14:34,522
Oh, yeah? Well, I'll come to you
348
00:14:34,557 --> 00:14:36,457
and gather... your...
your face!
349
00:14:36,492 --> 00:14:38,256
All right.
Negative vibes!
350
00:14:38,294 --> 00:14:39,693
Negative vibes!
351
00:14:39,729 --> 00:14:41,026
This Circle will
resume discussion
352
00:14:41,064 --> 00:14:44,466
after a round
of jumping jacks.
353
00:14:44,500 --> 00:14:45,661
Oh, God!
354
00:14:45,701 --> 00:14:47,396
Don't ruin jumping jacks.
355
00:14:47,437 --> 00:14:50,668
( Grunting )
356
00:14:53,676 --> 00:14:56,441
Looks like we're going
to have to drive
357
00:14:56,479 --> 00:14:58,379
into town
to get new poles.
358
00:14:58,414 --> 00:15:00,212
Bobby, my truck is gone!
359
00:15:00,249 --> 00:15:01,512
What happened?!
360
00:15:01,551 --> 00:15:03,849
MAN:
Hey, a talking bear!
361
00:15:05,588 --> 00:15:07,113
Ugh! My sleeping bag!
362
00:15:07,156 --> 00:15:08,954
Your nudity!
363
00:15:08,991 --> 00:15:11,358
Calm down.
'You can join us.
364
00:15:11,394 --> 00:15:13,590
Yeah, you can hold
the Yanni.
365
00:15:13,629 --> 00:15:15,859
Bobby, what
is going on here?
366
00:15:17,967 --> 00:15:20,197
Dad...
367
00:15:20,236 --> 00:15:22,671
I ate hippie gumbo!
368
00:15:22,705 --> 00:15:24,469
What? No!
369
00:15:24,507 --> 00:15:26,441
I know I was
supposed to be self-reliant,
370
00:15:26,476 --> 00:15:27,705
but I was hungry.
371
00:15:27,743 --> 00:15:29,905
And I didn't think
I'd ever catch anything,
372
00:15:29,946 --> 00:15:31,971
and they said
since they shared with me,
373
00:15:32,014 --> 00:15:33,812
I had to share our stuff
with them.
374
00:15:33,850 --> 00:15:36,410
And then they shared our stuff
all over the place,
375
00:15:36,452 --> 00:15:37,544
and I'm sorry.
376
00:15:44,694 --> 00:15:47,026
My name's Fudgie.
377
00:15:51,501 --> 00:15:53,401
Oh, divine Sun!
378
00:15:53,436 --> 00:15:55,666
ALL:
Oh, divine Sun!
379
00:15:55,705 --> 00:15:58,902
We observe
your holy wisdom!
380
00:15:58,941 --> 00:16:01,933
We observe your holy wisdom!
381
00:16:01,978 --> 00:16:04,879
So... the sun is God?
382
00:16:04,914 --> 00:16:06,075
Yes!
383
00:16:06,115 --> 00:16:07,549
Wow.
384
00:16:07,583 --> 00:16:09,642
RANGER BRADLEY:
The security camera shows
385
00:16:09,685 --> 00:16:11,847
that your truck
hasn't left the park.
386
00:16:11,888 --> 00:16:13,947
We'll monitor the exit
at all times
387
00:16:13,990 --> 00:16:15,458
to make sure it doesn't.
388
00:16:15,491 --> 00:16:17,550
( Sighing ). What's
your advice here?
389
00:16:17,593 --> 00:16:20,654
Just sit tight. This park
covers 1,000 square miles.
390
00:16:20,696 --> 00:16:22,824
And it's
mushroom season.
391
00:16:22,865 --> 00:16:25,425
Your truck could
be anywhere.
392
00:16:25,468 --> 00:16:28,631
Dad, I'm sorry
I ruined the trip.
393
00:16:28,671 --> 00:16:30,435
It was all my fault.
394
00:16:30,473 --> 00:16:31,770
Yes. Yes, it was.
395
00:16:31,807 --> 00:16:34,435
But, uh, you just
took responsibility
396
00:16:34,477 --> 00:16:35,876
and admitted it.
397
00:16:35,912 --> 00:16:39,314
That's the first step
towards self-reliance.
398
00:16:40,483 --> 00:16:42,144
What are you doing?
399
00:16:42,185 --> 00:16:44,677
I'm calling your mom
to come pick us up.
400
00:16:44,720 --> 00:16:48,520
I guess I'll have to come back
later and pack out my truck.
401
00:16:48,558 --> 00:16:50,526
'You mean, we're just giving up?
402
00:16:50,560 --> 00:16:52,688
The hippies have us
surrounded, Bobby.
403
00:16:52,728 --> 00:16:54,218
There's nothing we can do.
404
00:16:54,263 --> 00:16:55,230
But, Dad,
405
00:16:55,264 --> 00:16:56,459
if we just give up,
406
00:16:56,499 --> 00:16:59,161
the hippies might keep
coming back forever.
407
00:16:59,202 --> 00:17:01,671
They are like locusts,
but I don't know
408
00:17:01,704 --> 00:17:03,672
what the heck we
can do about it.
409
00:17:03,706 --> 00:17:06,801
I guess we'll just camp
somewhere else next year.
410
00:17:06,842 --> 00:17:09,004
Well, maybe
it's like what you said:
411
00:17:09,045 --> 00:17:12,709
If you want to catch a fish,
you have to think like a fish.
412
00:17:12,748 --> 00:17:14,876
We just have
to think like hippies!
413
00:17:14,917 --> 00:17:16,817
That is impossible.
414
00:17:16,852 --> 00:17:18,650
Come on, Dad.
Just try.
415
00:17:18,688 --> 00:17:20,486
Okay, I'm a hippie...
416
00:17:20,523 --> 00:17:24,153
I'm naked,
because I smoked all my clothes.
417
00:17:24,193 --> 00:17:25,160
Uh, yeah.
418
00:17:25,194 --> 00:17:26,252
Yeah.
419
00:17:26,295 --> 00:17:28,024
And I don't like
to work.
420
00:17:28,064 --> 00:17:29,225
Right.
421
00:17:29,265 --> 00:17:31,324
I like everything
handed to me.
422
00:17:31,367 --> 00:17:33,893
I'm just like a kid!
423
00:17:33,936 --> 00:17:39,136
Right! An overgrown kid who
can't take care of himself.
424
00:17:42,745 --> 00:17:46,045
Figures this is the one place
they're not burning incense.
425
00:17:46,082 --> 00:17:47,607
Stay in school, son.
426
00:17:47,650 --> 00:17:50,244
You know, Ranger Bradley,
the First Amendment
427
00:17:50,286 --> 00:17:52,846
guarantees the hippies
the right to be here.
428
00:17:52,888 --> 00:17:54,652
But as Bobby was pointing out,
429
00:17:54,690 --> 00:17:57,990
does it guarantee them the right
to these park services?
430
00:17:58,027 --> 00:17:59,620
Yeah, the ranger station
431
00:17:59,662 --> 00:18:01,790
shouldn't have to deal
with this.
432
00:18:01,831 --> 00:18:03,265
'You're telling me.
433
00:18:03,299 --> 00:18:06,234
Did you know that hippies
are the number-one source
434
00:18:06,269 --> 00:18:08,397
of airborne and
riverborne pollution?
435
00:18:08,437 --> 00:18:11,304
Right in front of Dow
Chemical and Mexican trucks.
436
00:18:11,340 --> 00:18:13,638
Uh, I'm not sure about that,
437
00:18:13,676 --> 00:18:16,737
but, uh, these hippies
have got to go.
438
00:18:16,779 --> 00:18:18,110
What would you say
439
00:18:18,147 --> 00:18:20,013
to Bobby and me taking care
of them ourselves?
440
00:18:20,049 --> 00:18:21,141
Great!
441
00:18:21,183 --> 00:18:22,651
How many fire hoses
do you need?
442
00:18:22,685 --> 00:18:25,279
I've got some pepper spray
that could take down a bear.
443
00:18:25,321 --> 00:18:26,880
Uh... uh-huh.
444
00:18:26,922 --> 00:18:30,119
Or maybe we could just cut off
some of the park's services.
445
00:18:30,159 --> 00:18:32,685
Well, that doesn't sound
quite as interesting,
446
00:18:32,728 --> 00:18:34,253
but you're on your own.
447
00:18:44,106 --> 00:18:46,404
Okay, what do we got?
448
00:18:46,442 --> 00:18:48,501
But I'm on a roll!
449
00:18:48,544 --> 00:18:52,003
I want to give strokes
and warm fuzzies to Bubble man
450
00:18:52,048 --> 00:18:54,915
for creating
limitless bartering periods...
451
00:18:54,950 --> 00:18:57,009
Bobby, grab the feather
for me.
452
00:18:57,053 --> 00:18:59,420
But I wasn't finished
with my heart song!
453
00:18:59,455 --> 00:19:00,684
Attention, people!
454
00:19:00,723 --> 00:19:02,748
Minutes ago, I spoke
with the Ranger,
455
00:19:02,792 --> 00:19:04,886
and due to unforeseen
circumstances,
456
00:19:04,927 --> 00:19:08,625
all services in the park will be
cut off, effective immediately.
457
00:19:08,664 --> 00:19:09,688
What?!
458
00:19:09,732 --> 00:19:11,200
Oh, no!
Oh, no!
459
00:19:11,233 --> 00:19:14,362
This means the port-a-potties
are no longer available.
460
00:19:14,403 --> 00:19:16,371
We have a right
to those potties!
461
00:19:16,405 --> 00:19:17,964
Yes, we do.Yeah!
I have the runs!
462
00:19:18,007 --> 00:19:20,874
Clean water will no
longer be provided to you,
463
00:19:20,910 --> 00:19:22,344
and as of this moment,
464
00:19:22,378 --> 00:19:25,109
the park's shack bar is closed.
465
00:19:25,147 --> 00:19:26,842
( Wailing ). No shacks?! What?!
466
00:19:26,882 --> 00:19:29,044
Hey, uh, is it just me,
467
00:19:29,085 --> 00:19:32,680
or am I picking up some
negative vibes out there?
468
00:19:32,722 --> 00:19:34,918
Well here's a positive vibe
for you--
469
00:19:34,957 --> 00:19:38,086
You don't need the park
to provide services for you,
470
00:19:38,127 --> 00:19:40,061
because we're gonna
show you how,
471
00:19:40,096 --> 00:19:41,564
with a little hard work,
472
00:19:41,597 --> 00:19:43,497
you can take care
of yourselves.
473
00:19:44,667 --> 00:19:45,793
Grab the feather!
474
00:19:45,835 --> 00:19:47,360
Yeah, this'll
be great!
475
00:19:47,403 --> 00:19:49,872
We'll teach you how
to dig your own latrines,
476
00:19:49,905 --> 00:19:53,136
maintain your own roads,
purify your own water,
477
00:19:53,175 --> 00:19:54,870
and catch your own fish.
478
00:19:54,910 --> 00:19:58,869
So, what do you say?
Who here is ready to work?
479
00:20:06,122 --> 00:20:07,453
Rumsfeld.
480
00:20:07,490 --> 00:20:09,652
So long now.
481
00:20:09,692 --> 00:20:11,854
Hank, Bobby...
482
00:20:11,894 --> 00:20:15,524
I came to say good-bye,
and wish you much love.
483
00:20:15,564 --> 00:20:16,929
Where are you going?
484
00:20:16,966 --> 00:20:19,901
Dallas. The Phish is playing
a musical concert there.
485
00:20:19,935 --> 00:20:22,233
We're all gonna live
in the parking lot.
486
00:20:22,271 --> 00:20:23,432
See ya.
487
00:20:23,472 --> 00:20:25,964
Will we ever see
Mr. Dauterive again?
488
00:20:26,008 --> 00:20:27,772
Around the 15th.
489
00:20:27,810 --> 00:20:31,610
That's when he has to report
back to work, or he's AWOL.
490
00:20:31,647 --> 00:20:34,048
Go to helll
491
00:20:34,083 --> 00:20:35,448
Good riddance!
492
00:20:35,484 --> 00:20:37,851
Hug this!
493
00:20:40,623 --> 00:20:42,785
Okay, you drive, I'll push.
494
00:20:42,825 --> 00:20:44,759
On three, punch the gas.
495
00:20:44,794 --> 00:20:47,422
I'm on it!
496
00:20:47,463 --> 00:20:48,589
( Grunts)
497
00:20:48,631 --> 00:20:50,121
One...
498
00:20:50,166 --> 00:20:52,134
two... three.
499
00:20:52,168 --> 00:20:54,227
( Engine turns )
Hit it!
500
00:20:58,574 --> 00:21:00,633
Okay, what do you
say there, son?
501
00:21:00,676 --> 00:21:01,768
Ready to go home?
502
00:21:01,811 --> 00:21:02,903
Not yet, Dad.
503
00:21:02,945 --> 00:21:05,573
We still gotta pick up dinner.
504
00:21:14,924 --> 00:21:19,361
Captioned by Media Access
Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org
505
00:21:51,927 --> 00:21:54,521
HANK ( sighing ):
They're hippies, son.
506
00:21:54,571 --> 00:21:59,121
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