All language subtitles for King of the Hill s02e21 life in the fast lane.eng

[Engine revving]

[Boomhauer's engine revving]

[Both engines revving]

[Tires squealing]

[Rock 'n' roll music playing]

[Siren wailing]

[Police radio chattering]

Hey, my dang ol' wife's in labor, man,
gonna go down to the hospital...

have that Lamaze partner, man.

Good evening, sir.
Do you know why I pulled you over?

Because you beat me. I want a rematch.

Not here. This is a school zone.

There's an amateur race
at the speedway this weekend.

Winner gets to drive the pace car
when NASCAR comes to town.

Whoa, man.
You talking about that NASCAR?

I been trying five years, man,
to get on that dang ol" pace car, man.

You gonna get me on in there?

I see I'm talking your language now. Here.

I'm gonna let that go.

[Theme song playing]

[Engine idling]

Okay, Bill, give her some gas.

[Engine revving]

Fuel mixture's still too rich.

DALE: Yep.
BOOMHAUER: Yep.

BILL: Hey, Boomhauer, look at me.
Maybe I could be a race car driver, too.

[Sighing]

[Grunting]

Yeabh, Bill,
you'd be a regular Dale Earnhardt...

if you could make it all the way around the
track without stopping for a Ding-Dong.

Or you can do like Jeff Gordon did,
and have a rich daddy.

I hate that Jeff Gordon. I bet I could be
NASCAR's top money-winner, too...

if my daddy had bought me
a quarter midget car...

instead of, you know, corrective shoes
that all the girls laughed at.

Yeah, his father didn't do him any favors,
I tell you what.

My dad didn't buy me a car
when I turned 16.

He sold me one, and it was a lemon.
Taught me the value of a dollar.

My dad never sold me anything.

BOBBY: Dad, could you please sign
this check? I already filled it out for you.

BOBBY: Dad, could you please sign
this check? I already filled it out for you.

"Pay to the order of The Bike Barn"?

$175!

It's for a new BMX bike.

You expect me to just sign this?

I think you have to, or it doesn't work.

Bobby, these checks aren't magic tickets.

They represent real money that I,
and to a lesser extent your mother...

work real hard to earn.

You can ride it whenever you want.

My point is, you don't just get money
because you ask for it.

You want to end up like Jeff Gordon?

I like Jeff Gordon. He's handsome.

[Laughs nervously]

Bobby, you joke around like that in public,
people are gonna think you ain't right.

BILL: Hey, guys. A little help here?

[Grunting]

Thank you very much.

[Buzzing]

But Jeff Gordon is handsome,
and he's a great champion.

[Sighs]

He's the world's fastest Christian.

He's a bad influence on our son.

Bobby thinks the world
is just gonna be handed to him.

He has no concept of the value of a dollar.

Watch. Bobby, come here.

Son, how much do you think
those shorts you're wearing cost?

I don't know. They're pretty nice. $1007

[Hank sighs pensively]

$100 for a pair of cotton short pants.

What do you think
the average salary is in this country?

Well, Jim Carrey makes
$20 million a movie.

You see that?

He doesn't even know the difference
between $20 million and $20,000.

You know, Bobby...

they say old Buck Strickland started out
with nothing but a single dollar bill.

And now he's at the top
of the propane ladder.

Bobby, here's your dollar.
Let's see what you can turn it into.

[Bobby grunting]

What are you doing, son? Did you use
that dollar to start a shoeshine business?

BOBBY: What?
HANK: Bobby!

You almost made me drop it.

HANK: This is what
you spent your dollar on?

No, I also got a quesadilla.
It's from the value menu.

Well, thank you, Hank.
Your plan certainly backfired.

You've spoiled his appetite.

Okay, I guess I was wrong.
But I'll get through to him.

There's a way in there, I know there is.

Maybe it's time Bobby got a job.

Hank, it's his vacation. He's just a boy.

He should be doing boyish things.

Bobby, how would you
like to go to cooking school?

I'm listening.

Bobby, I know we've
never talked about this...

but someday I'm going to die.

And when that happens,
then you can go to cooking school.

[Car horn honking]

Come on, Bobby.
You're coming with me to the racetrack.

[Bluesy instrumental music]

[Camera clicking]

-Well, Bobby, what do you think?
-The rope is soft and pretty.

Look at the pace car, Bobby.

It's what Boomhauer gets to drive
if he wins his amateur race.

What's a pace car?

Well, it's the car...

that all the other drivers
have to stay behind...

at the beginning of a race,
or whenever there's a crash.

If Boomhauer wins, he"ll have the honor
of driving on the same track...

as Dale Earnhardt,
or, as you'd look at it, with Jeff Gordon.

Jeff Gordon's a race car driver, too?

I thought he was just a cereal-box model.

Hey, sodas here. Get your sodas.

Hey, I'll take one.

Nice hustle, son.

[Dejected]
I can rest when I'm dead, sir.

You hear that, Bobby?
That is a good attitude.

That's what Mr. Witchard told us.
He's my boss.

Maybe someday
you can land a job like this.

Why not today?

HANK: Mr. Witchard, I wonder if you have
an opening for my son, Bobby, here.

If you work for Jimmy,
you're gonna work hard.

People up there are hot and dry.
They want something cold and wet.

You do your job, you make money,
but you work hard.

That's the way you work,
if you want to work for Jimmy.

So, if I understand you correctly...

you're saying you'll teach my boy
the value of a dollar.

If you work for Jimmy,
you gonna work hard. You make money.

WITCHARD: The people are hot and dry--
HANK: That sounds just fine.

This is going to be
a great experience for you, son.

HANK: My dad told me if I worked hard,
I could be another Buck Strickland.

Well, I don't know
who the hell Buck Strickland is...

but my dad told me I couldn't leave
this job until I got someone to replace me.

Good luck, Bobby. You're gonna need it.

PEGGY: You look so good in that apron,
like a cooking-school professor.

PEGGY: Say cheese.
BOBBY: Cheese.

Don't smile, son. You're a working man.

All right, now, remember, Bobby,
if there's a crash on the track...

here's the Fun Saver.
Try to get me two angles.

ANNOUNCER: T. Goods on takes the lead.

Don't come a-knockin',
'cause these trucks are rock in".

[Dejected instrumental music]

Soda! Hey, soda here! I got peanuts!

Peanuts!

[Grunts]

[Gasps]

MAN: Hey, soda!

[Ominous instrumental music]

[Bobby grunting]

[Groans]

[Grunting]

[Panting]

[Bobby grunts]

Oh, is that diet?

BOBBY: Regular.
MAN: Sorry.

[Gasps]

[Bobby sighs]

[Tires squeal]

[Car crashes]

[Crowd gasps]

WITCHARD: Hey, you. You want a hot dog?
BOBBY: Sure.

[Grunts]

$4.50 for a jumbo dog,
and $20 for a tray of stolen drinks...

and the $28 you owed me.

Now you owe me, yeah,
you owe me $52.50, Tommy.

I'm not Tommy, I'm Bobby.

You making fun of me? You're Tray 27.

See? 27! Tommy!
Go sell some sodas, Tommy.

[Bobby grunts]

[Witchard groaning derisively]

HANK: You know, maybe now's
a good time to run some pit-crew drills.

Time us, Boomhauer.
Bill, you clean the windows.

Dale and me will take tire duty.

[Engine revving]

HANK: Okay, go.

[Upbeat instrumental music]

HANK: Tire one, check.
DALE: Tire one, check.

HANK: Tire two.
DALE: Time out.

Man attached.

BOBBY: Mr. Witchard?

[Bobby gasps]

Mr. Witchard, I think I'm ready to go.

Okay.

You owed me $68 in trays...

and you paid me $72...

but you also owed me $40,
for a total of you owing me...

$88,888...

and 88 cents.

[Guitar strumming]

[Guitar strumming]

Hey, there's our working man.

Here, Bob, grab a root beer.

Yep.

You can say "yep," too. You've earned it.

Dad, I want to quit.

What? Quit?

It's horrible, Dad.
It's hot, and the tray is heavy.

And my boss is really mean.
And he calls me Tommy.

And he watches TV in a hot dog,
and I think he might be a moron.

Now, Bobby, I know your first day
was hard, but don't call your boss names.

That's acting like a baby.
Babies want everything handed to 'em.

But you're there to work, and not play.

That's why it's called "work,"
and not "play."

And if you don't understand that,
well, son, maybe you're the moron.

Okay.

There you go.

Now, what you need are
a few pointers on salesmanship.

Remember, a good salesman
always says "yes" to the boss.

He approaches every task
with a can-do attitude.

And when things get tough,
he shrugs it off and sings a happy tune.

This is that thing
about me giving 110 percent, right?

Bobby, if you weren't my son, I'd hug you.

That's tray number three, Mr. Witchard.
I'm giving 110 percent.

You know, I have to admit, at first,
I didn't think you were the best boss.

WITCHARD: I'm the boss.
BOBBY: I know.

My dad set me straight.

And I'm gonna be the best worker
you ever had.

WITCHARD: You work for me.
BOBBY: You bet I do.

You're gonna see
a whole new Tommy today.

How would you want to be my "go to" guy?

BOBBY: That's me!
WITCHARD: Okay.

First, you "go to" the men's room
and mop out the unerals.

Then you "go to" my cigarettes in my car.
Then "go to" back here.

Can do.

HANK: All right, give it another push.

Dale, no faking this time.

BOBBY: Dad! Your advice really worked.

Mr. Witchard promoted me to "go to" guy.

Wow! I hope you'll still return my calls.

You got any other success tips for me?

[Sighs pensively]

[Hank stuttering]

Here's a great one.
Find the job nobody wants...

and then do it better.

I'll do it better!

You're the "go to� guy.

ANNOUNCER: Welcome
to the Amateur Classic 100.

[Engines revving]

This is exciting, isn't it?

I'm excited, Hank.

We'll get excited when Boomhauer
takes that checkered flag.

Right now we got a job to do.

[Air whooshing]

[Bobby grunting]

WITCHARD: Smash it down good, Tommy.
Smash it. Down.

Smash, yeah.

Good, I said.
Don't be afraid of them bottles.

They pop good.
Make them pop good. Smash.

[Pants]

[Adventurous instrumental music]

[Tires screeching]

[Cheering]

DALE: All right, Boomhauer! Way to go!

Can we bring him in?

His windows look pretty dirty.

Well, he's probably low on gas.
I'll set the flag.

Remember to keep Dale away
from the, well, everything.

I'll get the gas,
check the tires and the suspension.

BILL: I'll get the windows.
HANK: Dale, here's a bucket of sand.

Hold it with both hands.

DALE: Hank, what am I supposed to do
with the sand?

It's slipping! Hank!

Never mind.

[Upbeat instrumental music]

All set, Boomhauer! Go!

I think we did it, Bill.
We kept Dale from screwing it up.

HANK: Bill?

Man! Ain't supposed
to be on those windows.

Dang ol', dang ol' weight up, man.

You saying no?
You can't say no to the boss.

And I'm the boss. See?

WITCHARD: So put on the hot dog, you--
BOY: No way. You put it on.

I'll do it, Mr. Witchard.

How come you keep wanting to do things
nobody wants to do?

Because I've got a can-do attitude, boss.

My dad says there's no limit to what a guy
with a can-do attitude can do.

Maybe one day, I'll even have your job.

WITCHARD: You're after my job?
BOBBY: Yes, sir.

You think you're so good?
You put on the suit now.

[Bobby groans]

It looked to me like you could have
cut that guy off in the last turn...

but fourth place
is nothing to be ashamed of.

HANK: Hang in there.

You may not get
to open the race tomorrow...

but if there are just three accidents,
you'll still get to drive that pace car.

Give it up, Hank.
The man's dream is no more.

HANK: No, we can't give up now.

You know, it was just the other day,
my boy wanted to quit his job...

because it was too tough.

And today, well,
I think you know how this story ends up.

Bobby Hill has become the "go to" guy.

[Jeering]

[Screams]

[Screams]

Dang!

Bobby, what are you doing up?
It's 5:30 in the morning.

Jimmy wants me to strain the bugs
out of the fryer before the oil gets too hot.

Well, you know what they say:

"Find what your niche is,
that leads to riches.�

Yeah, that makes a lot of sense, Dad.

But sometimes I still think
Jimmy Witchard ain't right.

HANK: Now, Bobby--

But then I remember about 110 percent.

[Car approaches]

That's the spirit.

ANNOUNCER: And we have
record attendance today...

with 62,427 fans.

[Crowd cheering]

That's a lot of people.

And it's hot. They're gonna want drinks.

I know that. You think I don't know that?
People are hot and dry.

They want something cold and wet.
Tommy!

It's nice, but where are the cigarette ads?

Hey, look, it's Dale Earnhardt,
and he's coming this way.

It's "The In timid at or."

[Bill gasping]

Hey, man, remember
that dang ol' third turn, Darling ton, man?

I just wanted to turn it loose
just make it go "wooo," I tell you what!

Man, this rope sure is soft and pretty!

I noticed it when we unloaded my car.

ANNOUNCER: And the honorary
pace-car driver to start the race...

Officer Clint "Radar" Jemson...

winner of the Amateur Classic 100.

The cars are getting good traction.
We're not gonna see many crashes today.

DALE: Yep.
BOOMHAUER: Yep.

So, okay, we wave this sign around
and Jeff Gordon sees it.

Then he comes up to us in the stands...

and is so taken by our charms
that he asks one of us to marry him.

And is so taken by our charms
that he asks one of us to marry him.

Well, honey, it probably won't be me.
I have got a ring on my finger.

Yeah, and big feet.

[Crashing]

I'm only ignoring that
because a man is on fire.

[Cars driving]

[Tires squealing]

BILL: Two down, one to go.

Soda! Get your soda!

Hey, what timing!
We're all ready for a cold soda.

DALE: I don't know.
It looks like Bobby sweat on them.

I had some milk, don't even need it.

It's on me.

BILL: Oh, goodie!
DALE: Oh, thanks.

Bobby, these sodas are hot.

Son, you gotta find a way
to be more efficient.

Listen to Mr. Witchard.
He'll tell you what to do.

Okay.

Witchard? Jimmy Witchard?

You told Bobby
to listen to Jimmy Witchard?

He was in my gun club.

People say he fried his brain one day,
just staring at the sun.

Of course, he couldn't have been too smart
to do that in the first place.

Kind of a chicken-egg thing.

[Panting]

Make me thirsty. I need a soda.

Hey!

Hey, you! Tommy, I need a soda.

Yes, Mr. Witchard.

WITCHARD: Not that way. Just run across.

But the track!

Don't backtalk the boss man.
Ain't you never crossed a highway?

Run when there ain't any cars.

They're going too fast!

Do it, you monkey boy! I'm the boss of you.

[Suspenseful instrumental music]

HANK: What the hell? Bobby, no!

What are you doing?

I'm gonna cross the track
and bring Mr. Witchard a soda.

That's crazy.
Why would you do something like that?

I'm giving 110 percent, Dad.

"Go to" here, "go to" boy!

I want a soda. "Go to" now, you.

[Growling]

ANNOUNCER: There's a crazy man
on the track.

[Screams]

And there goes Gordon into the wall.

GORDON: Daddy!

You're up.

DALE: Boomhauer, yeah!

[Witchard screams]

[Laughing]

You can't get me.

[Hank growling]

[Witchard moaning]

[Witchard screaming]

[Hank kicking]

[Witchard screaming]

Hey, Bobby, whatcha doing?
Playing a video game?

Okay.

[Hesitates]

I just wanted to say...

I should've listened to you when you said
how bad that Witchard guy was.

I almost died. I'd rather not talk about it.

Bobby, you worked harder this month
than any guy on this block...

and I wanna give you
the money you earned.

Dad, I don't want money.
I was happy before...

when you just bought all the stuff around
here and there was no money involved.

Well, still, I'd like to give you
a couple hundred dollars.

I tell you what.

Just buy me a couple of pairs
of short pants...

and we'll call it even.

And we'll call it even.

[Theme song playing]

WITCHARD: Do it, you monkey boy!

WITCHARD: Do it, you monkey boy!

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