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1
00:00:03,570 --> 00:00:07,666
Sensors detect a ship
on an intercept course at warp speed.
2
00:00:07,875 --> 00:00:09,707
Should we go to red alert?
3
00:00:09,776 --> 00:00:11,244
Make it so.
4
00:00:13,547 --> 00:00:15,777
JOSEPH: I'm having a party next Sunday.
5
00:00:15,849 --> 00:00:18,181
BOBBY: Can I come?
JOSEPH: I guess.
6
00:00:19,086 --> 00:00:21,646
Arm the photon torpedoes.
7
00:00:23,090 --> 00:00:24,489
[Hawking spit]
8
00:00:24,992 --> 00:00:26,858
Is there gonna be cake?
9
00:00:26,927 --> 00:00:29,692
No. This party's gonna be different.
10
00:00:29,997 --> 00:00:31,487
Different how?
11
00:00:31,899 --> 00:00:33,799
There's gonna be girls.
12
00:00:33,967 --> 00:00:34,900
Fire!
13
00:00:34,968 --> 00:00:35,901
[Spits]
14
00:00:35,969 --> 00:00:36,959
[Swallows]
15
00:00:40,207 --> 00:00:42,767
[Theme music]
16
00:01:08,368 --> 00:01:11,963
TEACHER: In 1983, disaster struck
Mrs. Alma Campbell...
17
00:01:12,039 --> 00:01:16,806
when she got her hair chemically relaxed
at the Casa Linda Salon in Las Cruces.
18
00:01:16,910 --> 00:01:18,639
What was the issue?
19
00:01:19,546 --> 00:01:20,775
Miss Platter?
20
00:01:24,217 --> 00:01:26,242
-It didn't look good?
-No.
21
00:01:26,553 --> 00:01:29,284
Miss Johnson, enlighten us, please.
22
00:01:29,590 --> 00:01:33,049
The stylist failed to detect
the subject's habitual overuse of henna...
23
00:01:33,126 --> 00:01:35,595
which prevents penetration
of chemical relaxants...
24
00:01:35,662 --> 00:01:38,188
like sodium hydroxide
and ammonium thioglycolate.
25
00:01:38,265 --> 00:01:41,963
TEACHER: Bravo. Remember,
the most difficult cut in beauty school...
26
00:01:42,035 --> 00:01:45,938
is the cut that separates first-year
students from second-year students.
27
00:01:46,006 --> 00:01:50,000
Think about that while you study
for next week's final exam, Miss Platter.
28
00:01:51,912 --> 00:01:54,438
BOBBY: A manicurist with
a seven-inch file...
29
00:01:54,514 --> 00:01:57,643
is on a train heading east
at 80 miles per hour.
30
00:01:57,918 --> 00:02:00,148
Not another manicure question.
31
00:02:00,721 --> 00:02:03,349
Why do I need to learn all this stuff?
32
00:02:03,590 --> 00:02:05,115
Beauty is an art.
33
00:02:05,192 --> 00:02:09,652
It's not something you can learn in school,
like gym or study hall.
34
00:02:10,130 --> 00:02:12,724
Bill's. Bill's. Bill's.
35
00:02:13,300 --> 00:02:15,769
Why do we keep getting Bill's mail?
36
00:02:15,869 --> 00:02:18,770
Uncle Hank, want me to give you
a whole new look?
37
00:02:18,839 --> 00:02:22,298
Why would I want to do that?
You don't mess with success.
38
00:02:22,376 --> 00:02:27,109
LUANNE: But I need as much practice
as I can get before my final. Please?
39
00:02:27,214 --> 00:02:31,208
Well, it has been almost a week
since my last haircut.
40
00:02:31,585 --> 00:02:34,316
-What the heck? I could use a trim.
-Great.
41
00:02:35,188 --> 00:02:37,122
I'll be right with you.
42
00:02:41,328 --> 00:02:45,094
-I can't see any highlights.
-Yes, you can. You love them. Next.
43
00:02:45,365 --> 00:02:47,959
Hey, what's cooking, good...
44
00:02:48,201 --> 00:02:50,499
Well, I do not like it either.
45
00:02:50,570 --> 00:02:53,631
But I am trying to be supportive
of Luanne's education.
46
00:02:53,707 --> 00:02:55,801
And I expect you to do the same.
47
00:02:55,876 --> 00:02:57,139
LUANNE: Uncle Hank!
48
00:02:57,210 --> 00:02:59,577
One chair, no waiting.
49
00:02:59,713 --> 00:03:01,511
No way, Peggy.
50
00:03:01,581 --> 00:03:03,913
My hair is our livelihood.
51
00:03:04,184 --> 00:03:07,643
The advantages of propane
don't always sell themselves.
52
00:03:07,821 --> 00:03:09,687
LUANNE: All set, Uncle Hank.
53
00:03:09,990 --> 00:03:11,617
Luanne...
54
00:03:11,692 --> 00:03:14,627
I'm thinking about
just letting my hair grow.
55
00:03:14,695 --> 00:03:15,685
Oh.
56
00:03:16,029 --> 00:03:18,999
Have you ever considered
a different color?
57
00:03:19,099 --> 00:03:20,089
[Laughs]
58
00:03:20,300 --> 00:03:21,961
Men don't do that.
59
00:03:22,335 --> 00:03:26,499
Sure they do. Even President Reagan did.
60
00:03:26,640 --> 00:03:30,599
If Ron Reagan dyed his hair,
and I'm not saying he did...
61
00:03:30,744 --> 00:03:34,078
it was only to show his strength
to the Communists.
62
00:03:36,550 --> 00:03:38,541
Joseph's having a party.
63
00:03:38,685 --> 00:03:42,178
A boy-girl party, with girls.
64
00:03:42,289 --> 00:03:46,351
You're gonna need some chaperones,
especially if my Bobby's there.
65
00:03:46,893 --> 00:03:49,260
Don't worry, I got it all under control.
66
00:03:49,329 --> 00:03:52,492
There's not gonna be any hanky-panky
at my house.
67
00:03:52,766 --> 00:03:54,427
Hey, John Redcorn.
68
00:03:54,701 --> 00:03:56,533
[Rock music playing in jeep]
69
00:03:56,903 --> 00:03:57,893
[Nervous laugh]
70
00:03:58,004 --> 00:03:58,994
Yeah...
71
00:03:59,740 --> 00:04:03,301
You know, it's about time
Bobby got bit by the love bug.
72
00:04:04,611 --> 00:04:07,546
Boy, when I was his age,
I was so girl-crazy...
73
00:04:07,614 --> 00:04:10,345
they called me Ricardo Montalban.
74
00:04:11,885 --> 00:04:13,819
-After the actor.
-Yep.
75
00:04:14,254 --> 00:04:17,349
Joseph's getting to be
a real lady-killer, too.
76
00:04:18,525 --> 00:04:21,256
I reckon he gets that from his old man.
77
00:04:24,631 --> 00:04:28,590
Hey there, Bobby.
I guess they found a cure for the cooties.
78
00:04:29,536 --> 00:04:31,766
I don't know. What are cooties?
79
00:04:31,838 --> 00:04:35,900
When I was a boy, that's what we called
the germs you got from girls.
80
00:04:35,976 --> 00:04:38,138
You mean, like chlamydia?
81
00:04:38,612 --> 00:04:40,546
PEGGY: What are you two talking about?
82
00:04:40,614 --> 00:04:43,606
Bobby was invited
to his first boy-girl party.
83
00:04:44,017 --> 00:04:46,748
A boy-girl party? Already?
84
00:04:46,820 --> 00:04:48,914
I don't think I want to go.
85
00:04:48,989 --> 00:04:52,425
That's just fine, Bobby.
Would you like a juice box?
86
00:04:52,492 --> 00:04:53,516
Wait a minute.
87
00:04:53,593 --> 00:04:57,723
Son, why would you not want to go
to a boy-girl party?
88
00:04:57,798 --> 00:04:59,698
Parties are fun, Bobby.
89
00:05:00,133 --> 00:05:03,626
Everybody dresses up.
And you get to touch dance.
90
00:05:04,137 --> 00:05:06,765
Touch dance? I don't know.
91
00:05:07,107 --> 00:05:10,907
-What if I get felt up?
-You just need some practice.
92
00:05:13,547 --> 00:05:15,879
Luanne's right. All you need is practice.
93
00:05:15,949 --> 00:05:20,511
Do you think Jeff Foxworthy just woke up
one day and took some funny pills?
94
00:05:21,188 --> 00:05:24,590
And that's why blondes
don't necessarily have more fun.
95
00:05:24,658 --> 00:05:25,819
All right, class.
96
00:05:25,892 --> 00:05:29,487
Let's take a few moments
to discuss next week's final exam.
97
00:05:29,563 --> 00:05:32,328
Mr. Hernandez, hand them their heads.
98
00:05:32,532 --> 00:05:35,661
You have to demonstrate
a year's worth of theory...
99
00:05:35,735 --> 00:05:37,294
on your practice head.
100
00:05:37,370 --> 00:05:40,499
Be advised, in beauty school, as in life...
101
00:05:40,574 --> 00:05:42,508
you only get one head.
102
00:05:42,609 --> 00:05:46,773
You will need to use both
to pass the exam, Miss Platter.
103
00:05:54,354 --> 00:05:57,881
GIRL: Hey, watch where you're going.
BOBBY: Okay.
104
00:06:01,294 --> 00:06:02,693
[Girls giggling]
105
00:06:11,538 --> 00:06:13,336
[Hissing]
106
00:06:23,984 --> 00:06:26,248
GIRL: [Monster voice] What have we here?
107
00:06:31,858 --> 00:06:33,417
KAHN JR.: Hey, Bobby, want to eat?
108
00:06:33,493 --> 00:06:35,962
What? Okay.
109
00:06:37,063 --> 00:06:39,122
Are you going to Joseph's party?
110
00:06:39,199 --> 00:06:43,136
No. My dad won't let me be around boys
until after I'm married.
111
00:06:43,203 --> 00:06:44,967
-Are you going?
-No.
112
00:06:45,171 --> 00:06:49,768
Joseph's got a birthday in nine weeks.
And I don't want to get partied out.
113
00:06:51,344 --> 00:06:54,041
HANK: Which bolo tie do you want
to wear to the party?
114
00:06:54,114 --> 00:06:56,276
The cow's skull or the bull's skull?
115
00:06:56,349 --> 00:06:58,818
-It doesn't matter. I'm not going.
-What?
116
00:06:58,885 --> 00:07:02,446
BOBBY: It's just a dumb party.
HANK: A dumb party with girls.
117
00:07:02,522 --> 00:07:04,513
I don't like girls.
118
00:07:05,492 --> 00:07:07,927
Peg, honey, close the screen door.
119
00:07:07,994 --> 00:07:10,088
-Can I speak with you?
-In a minute.
120
00:07:10,163 --> 00:07:13,360
PEGGY: In the kitchen.
HANK: This better be about dinner.
121
00:07:15,135 --> 00:07:17,729
PEGGY: Why don't you just drive
him out to Hollywood...
122
00:07:17,804 --> 00:07:19,499
and put him on The Dating Game?
123
00:07:19,572 --> 00:07:23,873
HANK: He's almost a teenager.
It ain't normal not to be curious.
124
00:07:23,944 --> 00:07:26,914
It is perfectly normal
for a late bloomer to be a little--
125
00:07:26,980 --> 00:07:28,505
He is not a late bloomer.
126
00:07:28,581 --> 00:07:31,949
How can you even think
something like that about your own son?
127
00:07:32,018 --> 00:07:35,648
He obviously is not ready
to socialize with the opposite sex.
128
00:07:35,722 --> 00:07:38,419
The way you baby him, he never will be.
129
00:07:42,996 --> 00:07:45,761
Do you know anyone
who would like a hot fudge sundae?
130
00:07:45,832 --> 00:07:48,426
LUANNE: Look, I got my practice head.
131
00:07:48,501 --> 00:07:51,232
It's got real hair and everything.
132
00:07:51,304 --> 00:07:54,001
-It's a very nice head--
-Don't touch it!
133
00:07:54,074 --> 00:07:57,908
I can't let anything happen to it
before my final exam.
134
00:07:58,111 --> 00:08:00,409
This is my chance to show everyone...
135
00:08:00,480 --> 00:08:03,074
it doesn't matter
that I wasn't paying any attention.
136
00:08:03,149 --> 00:08:04,446
I may not be...
137
00:08:36,683 --> 00:08:40,711
PEGGY: Bobby and I are going to the mall.
There is a sale on jockey shorts at Sears.
138
00:08:40,787 --> 00:08:43,119
LUANNE: Maybe I'll go with you.
139
00:08:44,190 --> 00:08:46,682
Okay. Bobby, vamanos, come on.
140
00:08:46,793 --> 00:08:50,423
BOBBY: I just remembered.
There's an after-school special on.
141
00:08:50,797 --> 00:08:52,424
It's about Jesus.
142
00:08:53,767 --> 00:08:56,168
Well, you cannot miss that.
143
00:08:57,203 --> 00:08:59,695
Okay, Luanne, it's just you and me.
144
00:09:00,340 --> 00:09:01,671
Okay, bye.
145
00:09:13,920 --> 00:09:14,910
[Clears throat]
146
00:09:14,988 --> 00:09:15,978
Hi.
147
00:09:16,623 --> 00:09:17,613
[Sighing]
148
00:09:18,091 --> 00:09:19,718
Hi, I'm Bobby.
149
00:09:23,229 --> 00:09:25,630
BOBBY: I'm sorry. We're all out of diet.
150
00:09:28,568 --> 00:09:31,833
You look really special tonight.
151
00:09:32,338 --> 00:09:33,999
You want to dance?
152
00:09:37,377 --> 00:09:39,903
[Salsa music playing on stereo]
153
00:09:45,452 --> 00:09:46,442
[Horn honking]
154
00:09:50,023 --> 00:09:51,252
[Music stops abruptly]
155
00:09:55,562 --> 00:09:56,552
[Door closing]
156
00:09:58,431 --> 00:10:00,456
-Hello, sweetheart--
-Nothing!
157
00:10:03,303 --> 00:10:05,931
HANK: Hey, Dale, Bill, Boomhauer.
158
00:10:06,005 --> 00:10:10,067
Don't you "Dale, Bill, Boomhauer" us.
You said noon.
159
00:10:10,143 --> 00:10:11,633
It's 12:15.
160
00:10:11,711 --> 00:10:14,908
Do you have any idea
how long we've been waiting?
161
00:10:14,981 --> 00:10:18,110
HANK: I overslept.
My damned hair's getting so long...
162
00:10:18,184 --> 00:10:21,119
it's rustling on my pillow
and keeping me up all night.
163
00:10:21,187 --> 00:10:22,177
LUANNE: Uncle Hank!
164
00:10:22,255 --> 00:10:25,714
I've never seen you with such long hair.
Come on. Let me trim it.
165
00:10:25,792 --> 00:10:29,387
No. Sorry, I love my long, long hair.
166
00:10:29,462 --> 00:10:31,829
Why don't you practice
on your practice head?
167
00:10:31,898 --> 00:10:34,663
But I only get one chance to cut that hair.
168
00:10:34,734 --> 00:10:38,693
Hey! We got a whole busload of
new recruits coming on the base today.
169
00:10:38,771 --> 00:10:40,398
You could practice on them.
170
00:10:40,473 --> 00:10:44,137
Thanks, Mr. Dauterive.
I'll go get my instruments.
171
00:10:44,944 --> 00:10:48,574
Boy, I can't wait for her
to get that damn test over with.
172
00:10:48,681 --> 00:10:50,740
I know. You know, I feel for that kid.
173
00:10:50,817 --> 00:10:55,254
I remember when I was starting
out as a young barber, I felt so alone--
174
00:10:55,321 --> 00:10:57,050
Nobody cares, Bill.
175
00:11:03,163 --> 00:11:06,189
Clean lines. Nice shape on the cowlick.
176
00:11:06,299 --> 00:11:07,789
Primo cut, Luanne!
177
00:11:07,867 --> 00:11:09,733
Thank you, Mr. Dauterive.
178
00:11:15,675 --> 00:11:16,665
[Whistles]
179
00:11:16,843 --> 00:11:18,140
PEGGY: Wow, you look good.
180
00:11:18,211 --> 00:11:19,701
You look better than good.
181
00:11:19,779 --> 00:11:21,907
You look like a weather man.
182
00:11:22,448 --> 00:11:25,975
I'm just gonna have some fruit
and a glass of skim milk.
183
00:11:26,920 --> 00:11:30,185
-I want to slim down for Joseph's party.
-Atta boy!
184
00:11:30,256 --> 00:11:32,281
But you said you didn't want to go.
185
00:11:32,358 --> 00:11:33,587
I changed my mind.
186
00:11:33,660 --> 00:11:35,424
He changed his mind.
187
00:11:35,595 --> 00:11:37,188
Bet I know why.
188
00:11:37,664 --> 00:11:39,632
Bobby Hill has a girlfriend.
189
00:11:39,699 --> 00:11:42,225
-He does not. Do you?
-No.
190
00:11:42,335 --> 00:11:44,599
There's nothing
to be embarrassed about, son.
191
00:11:44,671 --> 00:11:46,036
Hell, I'm proud of you.
192
00:11:46,105 --> 00:11:48,574
Hell, I'm proud of you, too, Dad. Bye.
193
00:11:48,641 --> 00:11:51,474
See, Peggy? Our boy is perfectly normal.
194
00:11:52,045 --> 00:11:54,309
[Romantic 1960s music playing]
195
00:12:38,224 --> 00:12:39,521
Hey, Courtney.
196
00:12:39,592 --> 00:12:41,321
How you doing, Ashley?
197
00:12:41,394 --> 00:12:44,557
Looking good, Maria.
I'll catch you later, Bonnie.
198
00:12:44,931 --> 00:12:48,231
Man, when did you get to be so slick?
199
00:12:48,835 --> 00:12:52,533
What do you mean?
Yo, Sharise, you stone-cold fox, what up?
200
00:12:52,605 --> 00:12:55,802
You are gonna be
the most popular guy at my party.
201
00:12:56,042 --> 00:12:58,374
I hope your lips don't fall off.
202
00:12:58,511 --> 00:12:59,774
From what?
203
00:12:59,846 --> 00:13:01,314
From kissing.
204
00:13:01,881 --> 00:13:04,043
We're gonna play Spin the Bottle.
205
00:13:04,117 --> 00:13:05,107
[Moans]
206
00:13:08,721 --> 00:13:10,052
BOBBY: Guess who?
207
00:13:12,425 --> 00:13:14,484
You look so tense.
208
00:13:15,461 --> 00:13:18,396
I have something special
planned for tonight.
209
00:13:25,538 --> 00:13:29,475
Bobby! Honey, I need some help
with the groceries!
210
00:13:32,612 --> 00:13:33,670
Bobby?
211
00:13:34,547 --> 00:13:37,448
[Mellow instrumental music]
212
00:13:41,654 --> 00:13:45,113
BOBBY: Relax, baby. It's just you and me.
213
00:13:50,830 --> 00:13:52,093
-Bobby!
-Mom!
214
00:13:57,804 --> 00:14:01,672
HANK: You must've got it wrong.
Maybe he just fell on it or something.
215
00:14:01,741 --> 00:14:05,905
Hank, he was kissing it.
I saw it with my own two eyes.
216
00:14:05,978 --> 00:14:08,379
I'm gonna be seeing it
for the rest of my life.
217
00:14:08,448 --> 00:14:10,746
Now, Peggy, it's not your fault.
218
00:14:11,684 --> 00:14:14,654
-Why'd you say that?
-I just said it's not your fault.
219
00:14:14,954 --> 00:14:18,822
Well, it did not need saying.
I know it is not my fault.
220
00:14:19,292 --> 00:14:21,624
If anything, this is your fault.
221
00:14:21,794 --> 00:14:24,161
You made him go
to that camp with no toilet doors.
222
00:14:24,230 --> 00:14:26,198
Don't point your finger at me, woman.
223
00:14:26,265 --> 00:14:28,734
You're the one who parks him
in front of the TV...
224
00:14:28,801 --> 00:14:30,599
and makes him watch all them Muppets.
225
00:14:30,670 --> 00:14:32,798
They got frogs kissing pigs.
226
00:14:33,005 --> 00:14:34,939
What did they think was gonna happen?
227
00:14:35,007 --> 00:14:37,942
We are not gonna get anywhere
by attacking each other.
228
00:14:38,010 --> 00:14:40,411
We have to do the sensible thing.
229
00:14:41,114 --> 00:14:42,809
-We'll move to Berlin.
-What?
230
00:14:42,882 --> 00:14:44,646
Bobby will be accepted there.
231
00:14:44,717 --> 00:14:47,982
I read somewhere that Germans,
they're a very tolerant people.
232
00:14:48,054 --> 00:14:50,318
Their culture admires all kinds of freaks.
233
00:14:50,390 --> 00:14:53,951
Our boy is not a freak. He's just confused.
234
00:14:54,026 --> 00:14:55,926
I'm gonna cut those apron strings...
235
00:14:55,995 --> 00:14:59,954
you got him tied down with
and set that boy straight, I tell you what.
236
00:15:01,234 --> 00:15:02,429
HANK: Bobby?
237
00:15:02,502 --> 00:15:05,563
We are heading down the hall
towards your room, son.
238
00:15:08,174 --> 00:15:09,471
[Knocking]
239
00:15:10,343 --> 00:15:13,422
That's us knocking, your mother and me.
240
00:15:13,446 --> 00:15:13,469
That's us knocking, your mother and me.
241
00:15:13,579 --> 00:15:14,671
Come in.
242
00:15:14,781 --> 00:15:17,273
HANK: Okay, then. We're coming on in.
243
00:15:25,892 --> 00:15:28,623
Bobby, how would you like
to go for a car ride?
244
00:15:29,829 --> 00:15:32,730
Look, Bobby, I'm as open-minded
as the next guy.
245
00:15:32,865 --> 00:15:36,597
But just so you know, most states
won't let you marry a plastic head.
246
00:15:36,736 --> 00:15:38,431
I don't want to marry it.
247
00:15:39,505 --> 00:15:43,237
I just needed to practice my first kiss,
so I don't look like an idiot.
248
00:15:43,376 --> 00:15:47,074
You're kissing a plastic head,
and you're afraid of looking like an idiot?
249
00:15:48,748 --> 00:15:50,910
Son, I'm doing this for your own good.
250
00:15:50,983 --> 00:15:53,077
You're just using this head as a crutch.
251
00:15:53,186 --> 00:15:54,915
It's not a crutch, Dad.
252
00:15:54,987 --> 00:15:58,048
It's something I've come to rely on
to help me through life.
253
00:15:58,724 --> 00:16:01,455
Well, I'll make you a deal.
Go to your party.
254
00:16:01,527 --> 00:16:04,326
Afterwards, if you still want this head,
you can have it.
255
00:16:04,397 --> 00:16:06,559
But I won't need it after the party.
256
00:16:06,632 --> 00:16:07,895
Exactly.
257
00:16:09,535 --> 00:16:11,503
HANK: Let this be the end of it.
258
00:16:13,506 --> 00:16:14,701
[Snoring]
259
00:16:18,344 --> 00:16:19,607
[Dog barking]
260
00:16:20,813 --> 00:16:22,042
[Snoring]
261
00:16:25,585 --> 00:16:26,575
[Lock opening]
262
00:16:27,887 --> 00:16:28,877
[Snoring]
263
00:16:31,591 --> 00:16:32,581
[Door creaking]
264
00:16:36,262 --> 00:16:39,493
Well, that just tears it.
I have tried to be patient.
265
00:16:39,565 --> 00:16:42,398
But now it's time for a little tough love.
266
00:16:45,838 --> 00:16:46,862
BOBBY: Wait!
267
00:16:46,939 --> 00:16:48,907
LUANNE: What's going on?
PEGGY: I don't know.
268
00:16:48,975 --> 00:16:51,706
BOBBY: No, Dad! No!
269
00:16:52,178 --> 00:16:53,168
[Saw running]
270
00:16:53,246 --> 00:16:54,338
Hank!
271
00:16:55,248 --> 00:16:57,182
Stop, Hank. Please.
272
00:16:57,517 --> 00:17:01,112
LUANNE: Oh, no. Please, not my head!
273
00:17:01,587 --> 00:17:04,420
LUANNE: My test! What about my test?
274
00:17:08,261 --> 00:17:09,592
TEACHER: Passable.
275
00:17:11,931 --> 00:17:13,296
Good.
276
00:17:13,633 --> 00:17:16,796
First, this is not the plastic head
you were issued.
277
00:17:16,903 --> 00:17:19,065
Second, just look at the way you shaved...
278
00:17:19,138 --> 00:17:21,800
against the grain here, here, and here.
279
00:17:22,408 --> 00:17:26,208
And these are the worst sideburns
I've seen since Chair 3...
280
00:17:26,279 --> 00:17:28,543
which makes me suspect you cheated.
281
00:17:28,781 --> 00:17:29,771
.
282
00:17:29,982 --> 00:17:31,347
That means, you fail.
283
00:17:36,522 --> 00:17:37,921
What a bitch.
284
00:17:39,325 --> 00:17:43,091
Don't cry, Luanne.
This is the best haircut I ever had.
285
00:17:43,162 --> 00:17:45,187
The hair is all nice and uniform...
286
00:17:45,264 --> 00:17:48,757
which is tough 'cause I have
bumps here and here.
287
00:17:49,035 --> 00:17:50,059
LUANNE: I noticed.
288
00:17:50,136 --> 00:17:53,629
I layered on the upslopes
and tapered on the down.
289
00:17:54,006 --> 00:17:56,873
Yep. This is my all-time favorite haircut.
290
00:17:58,044 --> 00:17:59,773
Thanks, Uncle Hank.
291
00:18:00,346 --> 00:18:01,541
Miss Platter?
292
00:18:03,182 --> 00:18:04,513
I'm sorry.
293
00:18:04,584 --> 00:18:06,609
I've been mean and unfair.
294
00:18:06,786 --> 00:18:09,050
I guess I just got so far from the hair...
295
00:18:09,121 --> 00:18:12,386
and so into the whole power trip
of running the academy...
296
00:18:12,458 --> 00:18:16,417
I forgot the most important principle
of the beautician's art.
297
00:18:17,296 --> 00:18:19,492
Repeat business and referrals.
298
00:18:20,232 --> 00:18:23,361
You pleased your customer. You pass.
299
00:18:30,476 --> 00:18:32,171
[Class applauding]
300
00:18:32,378 --> 00:18:34,107
[Cheering and whistling]
301
00:18:38,084 --> 00:18:41,247
Come here, Ladybird.
Come here. You're so pretty.
302
00:18:41,354 --> 00:18:42,947
[Makes kissing noises]
303
00:18:48,995 --> 00:18:53,330
PEGGY: Bobby, your father told me you
were just kissing the head for practice.
304
00:18:53,532 --> 00:18:55,967
Now, I know he made that up
to protect me.
305
00:18:56,035 --> 00:18:57,525
But I am your mother.
306
00:18:57,603 --> 00:19:01,301
And I have decided
that I am gonna love you no matter what.
307
00:19:01,841 --> 00:19:02,967
Okay.
308
00:19:03,042 --> 00:19:06,672
I realize I am just as much to blame
for your condition...
309
00:19:06,746 --> 00:19:08,646
as the media and the devil.
310
00:19:08,714 --> 00:19:11,945
I have been overprotective.
You're not a baby anymore.
311
00:19:12,018 --> 00:19:15,386
You are gonna have a long
and interesting life ahead of you.
312
00:19:15,454 --> 00:19:17,980
And it's time for me to just let go.
313
00:19:18,090 --> 00:19:20,115
Just let go. So you go on.
314
00:19:20,326 --> 00:19:22,761
You go to the party. That's right.
315
00:19:23,095 --> 00:19:26,258
Just spread your wings
and fly away, little bird.
316
00:19:39,912 --> 00:19:41,243
[Swallows]
317
00:19:46,619 --> 00:19:47,950
KAHN JR.: Watch out!
318
00:19:48,587 --> 00:19:50,954
Hey, aren't you going to Joseph's party?
319
00:19:51,023 --> 00:19:52,957
I can't. It's a make-out party.
320
00:19:53,025 --> 00:19:55,289
And my dad took away my plastic head.
321
00:19:55,361 --> 00:19:58,422
What a buzz kill.
I've been practicing, too. Look.
322
00:19:59,899 --> 00:20:01,867
What a great idea.
323
00:20:02,301 --> 00:20:04,167
I want my first kiss to be perfect.
324
00:20:04,236 --> 00:20:07,729
You know, something sweet
I can keep with me my whole life.
325
00:20:07,807 --> 00:20:10,276
Hey, Bobby, can we practice
on each other?
326
00:20:10,342 --> 00:20:13,277
-You want to kiss me?
-No, just practice.
327
00:20:14,346 --> 00:20:15,711
Okay.
328
00:20:15,781 --> 00:20:17,374
Close your eyes.
329
00:20:19,151 --> 00:20:20,676
This is stupid.
330
00:20:20,820 --> 00:20:23,152
Let's try it with our eyes open.
331
00:20:28,027 --> 00:20:29,495
Was that right?
332
00:20:29,562 --> 00:20:31,963
I think so. Do I have any hickies?
333
00:20:32,298 --> 00:20:34,096
I don't see anything.
334
00:20:34,166 --> 00:20:37,727
MINH: Kahn Jr., come home for dinner.
Your prawn's getting cold.
335
00:20:39,805 --> 00:20:42,331
Well, I better get to that party.
336
00:20:43,175 --> 00:20:44,700
Hey, good luck.
337
00:20:45,644 --> 00:20:46,839
Thanks.
338
00:20:48,280 --> 00:20:49,270
[Sighs]
339
00:20:50,049 --> 00:20:51,983
[Crickets chirping]
340
00:21:03,262 --> 00:21:06,197
DALE: All right!
Why is it so quiet down here?
341
00:21:06,265 --> 00:21:07,824
What are you kids up to?
342
00:21:07,900 --> 00:21:08,958
Dad!
343
00:21:12,505 --> 00:21:15,736
NANCY: Let's leave them alone.
DALE: You can't leave them alone.
344
00:21:15,808 --> 00:21:18,436
NANCY: For Pete's sake.
DALE: Told you this would happen.
345
00:21:18,511 --> 00:21:20,741
We get them boys and girls,
leave them alone...
346
00:21:20,813 --> 00:21:22,941
we get all that hanky-panky going on.
347
00:21:23,015 --> 00:21:25,211
NANCY: But that's what's
supposed to happen.
348
00:21:25,284 --> 00:21:26,945
DALE: it's the damn sugar.
349
00:21:27,019 --> 00:21:29,545
NANCY: Sugar, what?
350
00:21:38,330 --> 00:21:40,890
[Theme music]
351
00:21:40,940 --> 00:21:45,490
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