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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:01:19,299 --> 00:01:20,506 Peter, hi. 2 00:01:20,508 --> 00:01:22,633 Hi. Did I wake you? 3 00:01:22,635 --> 00:01:24,093 No, no. I'm awake. 4 00:01:24,095 --> 00:01:27,347 I can't remember where you said to meet now. 5 00:01:27,349 --> 00:01:29,559 Coastguard station. 6 00:01:30,810 --> 00:01:32,142 Is it near the sea? 7 00:01:32,144 --> 00:01:35,062 Yeah, the coastguard station is near the sea, yeah. 8 00:01:35,064 --> 00:01:37,982 I think I know the place. There's a kind of prom. 9 00:01:37,984 --> 00:01:41,904 And some iron men. An ice cream man. 10 00:01:42,029 --> 00:01:42,987 I'm sure I'll find it. 11 00:01:42,989 --> 00:01:45,323 Do you know if the ice cream man does coffee? 12 00:01:45,325 --> 00:01:47,533 You're there already, aren't you? 13 00:01:47,535 --> 00:01:48,159 No. 14 00:01:48,161 --> 00:01:52,666 I can hear the seagulls. I'll be there as soon as I can. 15 00:01:55,001 --> 00:01:57,837 Thanks for that. 16 00:02:06,221 --> 00:02:08,306 Is that what you're wearing? 17 00:02:08,806 --> 00:02:10,475 What's wrong with it? 18 00:02:11,934 --> 00:02:14,396 Nothing. It's very smart. 19 00:02:15,480 --> 00:02:16,939 It's just... 20 00:02:18,733 --> 00:02:20,067 What? 21 00:02:20,985 --> 00:02:25,240 Well, I don't know, do I? I don't know what's appropriate. 22 00:02:25,948 --> 00:02:27,575 Appropriate? 23 00:02:31,954 --> 00:02:33,790 Very, you know... 24 00:02:33,998 --> 00:02:35,456 Quadrophenia. 25 00:02:35,458 --> 00:02:38,668 I was admiring the, er, ice cream van too. 26 00:02:38,670 --> 00:02:40,422 What do you think? 27 00:02:41,173 --> 00:02:44,257 The cream looks really creamy. 28 00:02:44,259 --> 00:02:48,012 My friends and I were admiring your paintwork. 29 00:02:51,057 --> 00:02:52,559 Great detail. 30 00:02:53,601 --> 00:02:56,103 My son paints these. 31 00:02:58,064 --> 00:03:00,358 Maybe this is one of his. 32 00:03:02,902 --> 00:03:04,987 He does the jingles too. 33 00:03:11,244 --> 00:03:13,205 Do you do a cappuccino? 34 00:03:30,096 --> 00:03:31,389 Thanks. 35 00:03:33,558 --> 00:03:36,058 - Been here long? - I was admiring 36 00:03:36,060 --> 00:03:36,934 the ice cream van. 37 00:03:36,936 --> 00:03:38,436 Yeah, it's not one of mine. 38 00:03:38,438 --> 00:03:42,232 - I don't do smiley ice creams. - I appreciate that. 39 00:03:42,234 --> 00:03:45,027 Do you want to go in mine or yours? 40 00:03:47,530 --> 00:03:49,031 Yours then. 41 00:03:49,907 --> 00:03:51,451 I'll drive it. 42 00:04:16,268 --> 00:04:18,144 What do you think of this? 43 00:04:20,730 --> 00:04:22,021 Is it a new jingle? 44 00:04:22,023 --> 00:04:23,939 I'm the wrong age bracket, really. 45 00:04:23,941 --> 00:04:27,028 No, it's not a jingle. 46 00:04:27,445 --> 00:04:29,445 What's with the overnight bag? 47 00:04:29,447 --> 00:04:32,407 I thought we might need to make a night of it. 48 00:04:32,409 --> 00:04:34,325 No, no, no. I've got to get back. 49 00:04:34,327 --> 00:04:36,454 Sue's got stuff to do. 50 00:04:36,704 --> 00:04:39,707 Everything all right at home, is it? 51 00:04:40,583 --> 00:04:42,084 Fine, thanks. 52 00:04:42,710 --> 00:04:45,922 Just a funny way of putting things, that's all. 53 00:04:47,882 --> 00:04:48,464 What? 54 00:04:48,466 --> 00:04:50,633 "I've got to be back because Sue's got stuff to do." 55 00:04:50,635 --> 00:04:53,428 Haven't you got stuff to do? Isn't this... 56 00:04:53,430 --> 00:04:56,806 - stuff? - Work. She's got work. 57 00:04:56,808 --> 00:04:58,974 Anyway what are you doing? It's like being in the car 58 00:04:58,976 --> 00:05:01,644 - with Jack. - It's a word game. An App. 59 00:05:01,646 --> 00:05:03,688 Lication. What was that about Jack? 60 00:05:03,690 --> 00:05:06,274 Are you not relating to him properly? 61 00:05:06,276 --> 00:05:07,525 - Am I what? - A girl in China 62 00:05:07,527 --> 00:05:09,694 played a computer game for three days and nights 63 00:05:09,696 --> 00:05:11,196 without a break. Dropped dead of exhaustion. 64 00:05:11,198 --> 00:05:13,239 - You want to watch your Jack. - What are you doing 65 00:05:13,241 --> 00:05:14,532 on your phone at a time like this? 66 00:05:14,534 --> 00:05:16,367 - We should be talking. - Since when did games 67 00:05:16,369 --> 00:05:18,118 stop people talking? Talking is what we did 68 00:05:18,120 --> 00:05:20,996 - when we played Scrabble. - We didn't play Scrabble. 69 00:05:20,998 --> 00:05:23,249 What? We were always playing Scrabble. 70 00:05:23,251 --> 00:05:26,461 It wasn't Scrabble. It was Scrabble-like. 71 00:05:26,463 --> 00:05:28,879 It was called Scribble. Or Scrobble. 72 00:05:28,881 --> 00:05:31,674 It was a cheap rip-off of Scrabble. 73 00:05:31,676 --> 00:05:33,468 The letters came on a cardboard sheet 74 00:05:33,470 --> 00:05:35,970 - and we had to press them out. - Oh, yeah. 75 00:05:35,972 --> 00:05:38,514 And you always insisted on having the dictionary 76 00:05:38,516 --> 00:05:39,724 - on the table. - Well, at least 77 00:05:39,726 --> 00:05:41,351 we played each other and not the bloody phone. 78 00:05:41,353 --> 00:05:43,603 That's the amazing thing. I'm not playing the phone. 79 00:05:43,605 --> 00:05:46,522 There's this guy called Skinny Thesaurus, 80 00:05:46,524 --> 00:05:49,110 and he's absolutely brilliant. 81 00:05:49,569 --> 00:05:52,487 Fine, talk to your digital mates then. 82 00:05:52,489 --> 00:05:53,948 What? 83 00:05:54,115 --> 00:05:54,947 I'm sure I'm going deaf. 84 00:05:54,949 --> 00:05:57,619 I don't hear half of what you're saying. 85 00:06:04,542 --> 00:06:05,250 You all right? 86 00:06:05,252 --> 00:06:08,588 Yeah, I'm fine. We've got to come back in the morning. 87 00:06:09,172 --> 00:06:10,713 It's only... Not even ten-to yet. 88 00:06:10,715 --> 00:06:14,717 The official who does it is on a job-share type of thing. 89 00:06:14,719 --> 00:06:15,801 Austerity. They finished early. 90 00:06:15,803 --> 00:06:18,638 Child-minding. We'll have to make a night of it. 91 00:06:18,640 --> 00:06:20,515 No, no, no. We'll go home and we'll come back 92 00:06:20,517 --> 00:06:22,183 in the morning. It's already getting dark. 93 00:06:22,185 --> 00:06:26,979 A Roads in the dark. Oncoming full-beam. Nightmarish. 94 00:06:26,981 --> 00:06:28,314 We'll get some sleep. 95 00:06:28,316 --> 00:06:29,649 We'd have to find somewhere to stay. 96 00:06:29,651 --> 00:06:32,693 Oh, that's okay. I've already booked somewhere. 97 00:06:32,695 --> 00:06:34,737 I never thought this was a realistic itinerary. 98 00:06:34,739 --> 00:06:37,365 I booked somewhere the day we heard. 99 00:06:37,367 --> 00:06:38,783 - Unbelievable. - There we go again. 100 00:06:38,785 --> 00:06:41,076 I didn't hear that either. It's almost as if you wanted 101 00:06:41,078 --> 00:06:43,078 to say things but you don't want me to hear them. 102 00:06:43,080 --> 00:06:45,080 It's like a kind of passive-aggressive thing. 103 00:06:45,082 --> 00:06:46,499 I said I didn't bring a toothbrush. 104 00:06:46,501 --> 00:06:48,709 Oh. Well, I noticed you didn't have a bag, 105 00:06:48,711 --> 00:06:51,003 so I got you one when we stopped for petrol. 106 00:06:51,005 --> 00:06:52,674 Which do you want? 107 00:06:52,840 --> 00:06:55,092 Cyberman or... 108 00:06:56,261 --> 00:06:57,595 Dalek. 109 00:07:04,186 --> 00:07:06,727 Obviously, the circumstances could be better, 110 00:07:06,729 --> 00:07:09,689 but on the other hand how often do we get to sit around 111 00:07:09,691 --> 00:07:12,068 enjoying each other's company? 112 00:07:12,652 --> 00:07:15,655 Let's us two make the best of it, eh? 113 00:07:30,127 --> 00:07:31,671 This is cosy. 114 00:07:32,129 --> 00:07:34,882 You can't beat a proper fire, can you? 115 00:07:40,555 --> 00:07:45,891 Excuse me. We couldn't have the music down a bit, could we? 116 00:07:45,893 --> 00:07:47,270 Or off. 117 00:07:51,399 --> 00:07:54,817 I always say the only good thing about jazz is that it scores 118 00:07:54,819 --> 00:07:56,821 very highly in Scrabble. 119 00:07:59,824 --> 00:08:04,537 In fact, you can't play the word "jazz" in Scrabble. 120 00:08:05,497 --> 00:08:07,915 There's only one "z" in the set. 121 00:08:08,416 --> 00:08:10,333 Oh, is that right? 122 00:08:10,335 --> 00:08:12,879 That's very interesting, that. 123 00:08:14,046 --> 00:08:16,007 There's only one "z". 124 00:08:16,549 --> 00:08:18,924 I haven't played Scrabble for years. I don't suppose 125 00:08:18,926 --> 00:08:20,134 anybody does these days, do they? 126 00:08:20,136 --> 00:08:23,388 It's all Grand Theft Auto now, isn't it? 127 00:08:23,390 --> 00:08:25,350 Arthur likes Scrabble. 128 00:08:25,475 --> 00:08:27,101 Don't you, Arthur? 129 00:08:27,435 --> 00:08:31,020 Peter, you'd love a game of Scrabble, wouldn't you? 130 00:08:31,022 --> 00:08:33,231 There's a set over there, look. 131 00:08:33,233 --> 00:08:35,193 Under the Cluedo. 132 00:09:04,597 --> 00:09:06,472 You need to count all the tiles. 133 00:09:06,474 --> 00:09:09,016 You don't want to get half way through a game and find 134 00:09:09,018 --> 00:09:11,271 you've got tiles missing. 135 00:09:12,522 --> 00:09:16,316 - I'm going to go to bed. - Oh, it's only half past eight. 136 00:09:16,318 --> 00:09:18,234 Come on. Have a game of Scrabble. 137 00:09:18,236 --> 00:09:19,902 You used to love Scrabble. 138 00:09:19,904 --> 00:09:21,779 I used to likeThunderCats. 139 00:09:21,781 --> 00:09:25,117 - I've moved on. - What are you gonna do? 140 00:09:25,618 --> 00:09:27,119 Say my prayers. 141 00:09:27,787 --> 00:09:29,497 It's a big day tomorrow. 142 00:09:42,302 --> 00:09:45,805 Exterminate. 143 00:09:45,972 --> 00:09:48,598 Exterminate. 144 00:09:48,600 --> 00:09:51,686 Exterminate. 145 00:10:02,489 --> 00:10:06,618 You don't fancy making this a bit more interesting, do you? 146 00:10:09,787 --> 00:10:11,331 How do you mean? 147 00:10:12,081 --> 00:10:12,663 A bet. 148 00:10:12,665 --> 00:10:15,040 - A flutter? A wager? - Or maybe not. 149 00:10:15,042 --> 00:10:17,502 You've obviously got a massive, what's it? 150 00:10:17,504 --> 00:10:22,717 - Lots of words. - Vocabulary. Lexicon. Wordhoard. 151 00:10:23,676 --> 00:10:25,176 That's very good. 152 00:10:25,178 --> 00:10:27,054 What do you think? 153 00:10:28,556 --> 00:10:30,350 If... we said... 154 00:10:31,226 --> 00:10:31,932 five? 155 00:10:31,934 --> 00:10:35,772 You're a confident man, Arthur. 156 00:10:36,439 --> 00:10:40,358 Oh, I haven't got 500 to spare, unfortunately. 157 00:10:40,360 --> 00:10:43,278 - Oh, well... - I've got 200. Is that okay? 158 00:10:43,280 --> 00:10:44,320 Or two... 159 00:10:44,322 --> 00:10:46,447 20, in fact. But call it 200. 160 00:10:46,449 --> 00:10:48,660 Never bet your last pound, eh? 161 00:10:49,536 --> 00:10:50,995 Two hundred? 162 00:10:53,956 --> 00:10:55,458 Sure. Why not? 163 00:11:01,381 --> 00:11:02,965 Ladies first. 164 00:11:03,883 --> 00:11:07,011 Oh. And I can bingo. 165 00:11:08,763 --> 00:11:10,638 That's when you can play all seven 166 00:11:10,640 --> 00:11:11,889 of your letters in one go. 167 00:11:11,891 --> 00:11:13,391 You get an extra 50 points for that. 168 00:11:13,393 --> 00:11:16,101 Oh, that's good, isn't it? Bingo, eh. 169 00:11:16,103 --> 00:11:18,565 You learn something new every day. 170 00:11:23,778 --> 00:11:27,488 Xi. That's a word, is it? Is that a word? 171 00:11:27,490 --> 00:11:29,990 It's a letter in the Greek alphabet. Alpha, 172 00:11:29,992 --> 00:11:33,578 - beta, gamma, delta, epsilon... - So it's not a word. 173 00:11:33,580 --> 00:11:36,581 - It's a letter. - No, it's a word. It's, erm, 174 00:11:36,583 --> 00:11:39,794 it's a word for a letter of the Greek alphabet. 175 00:11:42,464 --> 00:11:46,341 - M... What? - Muzjiks? Is that not a word? 176 00:11:46,343 --> 00:11:47,967 I know I've heard it somewhere before, 177 00:11:47,969 --> 00:11:51,387 - but if you haven't, then. - Dictionary. 178 00:11:51,389 --> 00:11:54,182 Arthur, it looks like a word. Play on. 179 00:11:54,184 --> 00:11:57,187 I could change it to Muzak. 180 00:12:01,148 --> 00:12:01,772 "Muzjik... 181 00:12:01,774 --> 00:12:07,071 - an indentured Russian peasant." - I knew I'd heard it before. 182 00:12:07,780 --> 00:12:09,697 - Where? - Where what? 183 00:12:09,699 --> 00:12:11,073 Where did you hear that? 184 00:12:11,075 --> 00:12:12,700 That's a very unusual word. 185 00:12:12,702 --> 00:12:15,077 It's not exactly in every-day use, is it? 186 00:12:15,079 --> 00:12:17,538 Come on down to Muzjiks-R-Us for all 187 00:12:17,540 --> 00:12:22,293 - your indentured peasant needs. - Arthur, it's a word. 188 00:12:22,295 --> 00:12:25,298 - What's it score? - Er... 189 00:12:26,466 --> 00:12:30,885 - A hundred and seventeen. - That's really good. 190 00:12:30,887 --> 00:12:31,927 Murmansk, by the way. 191 00:12:31,929 --> 00:12:35,306 I think I heard it in Murmansk. When I was in the Merchant Navy. 192 00:12:35,308 --> 00:12:38,019 We were in and out of Murmansk. 193 00:12:39,562 --> 00:12:42,104 It's what they call the storyteller in West Africa. 194 00:12:42,106 --> 00:12:45,443 - When I was on the Gold Coast... - Just play the word. 195 00:12:48,070 --> 00:12:49,154 Esrom? 196 00:12:49,156 --> 00:12:51,199 I think it's a font. 197 00:12:51,616 --> 00:12:54,492 Actually, it's a cheese. Made by Trappist monks. 198 00:12:54,494 --> 00:12:57,203 The stinkiest cheese in the world. 199 00:12:57,205 --> 00:12:57,953 Oh, 200 00:12:57,955 --> 00:13:00,500 it looks like I've bingo'd too. 201 00:13:01,334 --> 00:13:04,043 It's an Italian card game. You have two teams... 202 00:13:04,045 --> 00:13:06,130 Yeah, I know what Scopone is. 203 00:13:09,592 --> 00:13:10,966 I was going to play quartz. 204 00:13:10,968 --> 00:13:14,554 - You beat him to the q. - Is that right, Arthur? 205 00:13:14,556 --> 00:13:16,556 What's "qi" when it's at home? 206 00:13:16,558 --> 00:13:20,643 It's, um, life energy in Chinese philosophy. 207 00:13:20,645 --> 00:13:23,813 My aroma therapist is always talking about qi. 208 00:13:23,815 --> 00:13:26,901 I have aromatherapy for stress. 209 00:13:27,068 --> 00:13:29,026 You'd know about it if you ever listened 210 00:13:29,028 --> 00:13:31,404 - to a word I said. - Well, I didn't know 211 00:13:31,406 --> 00:13:32,197 about it, did I? 212 00:13:32,199 --> 00:13:33,489 He doesn't know anything about me. 213 00:13:33,491 --> 00:13:36,116 - I know you do aromatherapy. - You don't do aromatherapy. 214 00:13:36,118 --> 00:13:38,705 - You have it. - Like chicken pox. 215 00:13:38,996 --> 00:13:40,788 I have stress. 216 00:13:40,790 --> 00:13:43,876 You can probably see where I get it from. 217 00:13:48,340 --> 00:13:53,008 - Ti. A drink with jam and bread. - That's not how you spell it. 218 00:13:53,010 --> 00:13:54,929 Not tea. 219 00:13:55,263 --> 00:13:55,761 Ti. 220 00:13:55,763 --> 00:13:58,681 - Do-re-me-fa-so-la... - He's right. 221 00:13:58,683 --> 00:14:00,352 I know I'm right. 222 00:14:01,936 --> 00:14:04,814 It's a firearm with a... 223 00:14:05,273 --> 00:14:07,400 you know this, don't you? 224 00:14:14,491 --> 00:14:17,116 - What did you do that for? - What? 225 00:14:17,118 --> 00:14:18,909 What did you get for that? 226 00:14:18,911 --> 00:14:22,747 Six. Six points. Why did you do that? 227 00:14:22,749 --> 00:14:25,250 I was going to use that "men". I was going to turn it 228 00:14:25,252 --> 00:14:28,628 into "Anadyomene". Sixty-seven points. 229 00:14:28,630 --> 00:14:30,340 Where are you going? 230 00:14:30,465 --> 00:14:34,093 What's wrong? It's only a game. 231 00:14:36,929 --> 00:14:39,557 I'm going to take a leak. 232 00:14:40,057 --> 00:14:41,434 Oh... 233 00:14:41,559 --> 00:14:42,894 sorry. 234 00:14:44,354 --> 00:14:45,813 Go on then. 235 00:14:52,737 --> 00:14:54,279 I'm sorry about this. 236 00:14:54,281 --> 00:14:57,657 - He's on edge. - I can see that. 237 00:14:57,659 --> 00:14:59,702 He's not always like this. 238 00:14:59,827 --> 00:15:02,162 He used to be a singer, can you believe? 239 00:15:02,164 --> 00:15:04,372 - A singer? - Sessions. You know. 240 00:15:04,374 --> 00:15:07,500 Remember back in the day when they used to do those... 241 00:15:07,502 --> 00:15:10,378 top 20 hits but not by the original artists. 242 00:15:10,380 --> 00:15:12,963 - Pickwick? - PickwickTop of the Pops. 243 00:15:12,965 --> 00:15:16,093 - No. - He was the Pickwick singer. 244 00:15:16,969 --> 00:15:21,724 He's been them all. Ken Dodd. Freddy Mercury. 245 00:15:24,352 --> 00:15:28,190 - He never sings anymore. - Oh, that's a shame. 246 00:15:31,943 --> 00:15:33,695 We lost our son. 247 00:15:35,280 --> 00:15:36,864 He went missing. 248 00:15:37,574 --> 00:15:39,784 We haven't seen him since. 249 00:15:40,410 --> 00:15:41,075 He was 19. 250 00:15:41,077 --> 00:15:44,579 That's why we're here. The police have found a body. 251 00:15:44,581 --> 00:15:47,124 It might be the body of our son. 252 00:15:47,917 --> 00:15:51,296 Oh, that's terrible. I'm sorry about that. 253 00:15:52,505 --> 00:15:53,963 You think it's... 254 00:15:53,965 --> 00:15:57,385 it's the not knowing that's the hardest. 255 00:15:58,386 --> 00:15:59,677 But tomorrow, maybe we will know. 256 00:15:59,679 --> 00:16:03,475 And maybe we'll wish we were back to not knowing, eh? 257 00:16:07,770 --> 00:16:09,645 Hope is a great friend. 258 00:16:09,647 --> 00:16:11,065 Yeah. 259 00:16:12,609 --> 00:16:14,777 He was Bonnie Tyler once. 260 00:16:15,069 --> 00:16:17,320 - Bonnie Tyler? - Yeah. 261 00:16:17,322 --> 00:16:20,030 He sang the Pickwick version of "It's a Heartache". 262 00:16:20,032 --> 00:16:22,827 You'd never have known it wasn't her. 263 00:16:39,677 --> 00:16:41,804 We thought it would all be... 264 00:16:42,680 --> 00:16:44,349 over with today. 265 00:16:46,809 --> 00:16:48,645 But when we got here... 266 00:16:49,521 --> 00:16:51,229 the official who runs the morgue, 267 00:16:51,231 --> 00:16:53,149 can you believe this... 268 00:16:53,650 --> 00:16:55,150 is on a job share. 269 00:16:55,152 --> 00:16:58,070 Had to leave early. Childcare. 270 00:17:03,785 --> 00:17:06,329 So. Anadyomene? 271 00:17:08,581 --> 00:17:12,082 I'm going to take "Amen" off the board. 272 00:17:12,084 --> 00:17:14,043 Alan doesn't mind, do you, Alan? 273 00:17:14,045 --> 00:17:16,254 No, no, not at all. Part of the fun 274 00:17:16,256 --> 00:17:18,841 is the magic of lovely words. 275 00:18:08,057 --> 00:18:09,351 Dad? 276 00:18:09,476 --> 00:18:11,644 - You all right? - Yeah. 277 00:18:12,061 --> 00:18:15,898 You know me. I can't sleep without a walk. 278 00:18:18,193 --> 00:18:20,153 Ever since, you know. 279 00:18:23,948 --> 00:18:27,535 I used to go out looking for him. 280 00:18:28,745 --> 00:18:32,332 Just walking the streets, you know. 281 00:18:33,250 --> 00:18:36,628 It's just a habit now. A ritual. 282 00:18:37,420 --> 00:18:38,713 I know. 283 00:18:41,799 --> 00:18:43,301 Bonnie Tyler. 284 00:18:44,927 --> 00:18:45,468 What? 285 00:18:50,392 --> 00:18:51,726 What is? 286 00:18:53,686 --> 00:18:56,063 Arthur, downstairs. 287 00:18:56,314 --> 00:18:57,021 Bonnie Tyler. 288 00:18:57,023 --> 00:18:59,982 PickwickTop of the Pops compilation album. 289 00:18:59,984 --> 00:19:02,236 No. 290 00:19:07,450 --> 00:19:08,785 Yeah. 291 00:19:14,874 --> 00:19:19,128 It was for him, anyway. Two hundred I took off him. 292 00:19:20,963 --> 00:19:22,129 You did what? 293 00:19:22,131 --> 00:19:23,548 I beat him. 294 00:19:23,550 --> 00:19:25,466 You hustled him? You hustled Bonnie Tyler... 295 00:19:25,468 --> 00:19:29,139 I didn't hustle him. I smashed him. 296 00:19:30,265 --> 00:19:32,097 Did you use your extra "z" on him? 297 00:19:32,099 --> 00:19:33,601 You what? 298 00:19:33,935 --> 00:19:35,310 "You can't play jazz in Scrabble 299 00:19:35,312 --> 00:19:38,440 because there's only one 'z' in the set." 300 00:19:38,523 --> 00:19:39,857 And? 301 00:19:40,650 --> 00:19:43,110 You played jazz that night. 302 00:19:44,946 --> 00:19:46,571 You played it off "zygote". 303 00:19:46,573 --> 00:19:49,949 Top right-hand corner. Triple word score, 304 00:19:49,951 --> 00:19:51,869 scored off the board. 305 00:19:58,710 --> 00:20:01,502 They're going up there themselves tomorrow. 306 00:20:01,504 --> 00:20:04,172 - Up where? - The morgue. 307 00:20:04,174 --> 00:20:05,798 They've got a son who went missing. 308 00:20:05,800 --> 00:20:08,511 They're gonna take a look at a body. 309 00:20:08,886 --> 00:20:10,761 That's the same body we're going to look at. 310 00:20:10,763 --> 00:20:12,722 The one that might be our Michael? 311 00:20:12,724 --> 00:20:14,309 That's right. 312 00:20:17,354 --> 00:20:18,686 Their son goes missing. 313 00:20:18,688 --> 00:20:20,313 They're going to look at the body. 314 00:20:20,315 --> 00:20:23,358 And you hustle them out of 200 quid? 315 00:20:23,360 --> 00:20:27,530 - Who are you? - When you put it like that. 316 00:20:29,073 --> 00:20:32,950 It started off as a game, then when I found out 317 00:20:32,952 --> 00:20:34,787 I... I seemed to... 318 00:20:37,499 --> 00:20:39,709 I got the feeling that... 319 00:20:42,379 --> 00:20:43,919 if I let him beat me, it would be our Michael 320 00:20:43,921 --> 00:20:48,134 and if I won, it would be their lad. I know it's mad. 321 00:21:01,773 --> 00:21:03,439 What are you doing here? 322 00:21:03,441 --> 00:21:05,360 This is where we, er... 323 00:21:08,863 --> 00:21:11,697 - Were you waiting for us? - No. 324 00:21:11,699 --> 00:21:14,244 We're here for the same... 325 00:21:14,869 --> 00:21:17,289 my lad went missing too. 326 00:21:18,956 --> 00:21:20,250 Oh. 327 00:21:20,583 --> 00:21:22,084 You didn't say. 328 00:21:22,294 --> 00:21:23,795 I didn't like... 329 00:21:23,878 --> 00:21:26,798 You were telling me about yours and... 330 00:21:28,466 --> 00:21:30,760 It was good of you to listen. 331 00:21:32,011 --> 00:21:33,513 If I'd known... 332 00:21:33,846 --> 00:21:35,598 You weren't to know. 333 00:21:40,187 --> 00:21:41,688 Mr. Mellor? 334 00:21:44,982 --> 00:21:46,276 I'll go. 335 00:21:54,075 --> 00:21:56,367 I thought you were a woman. 336 00:21:56,369 --> 00:21:58,413 Childcare issues. 337 00:21:58,830 --> 00:22:01,664 No, I, I have a three-year-old and, er... 338 00:22:01,666 --> 00:22:03,999 I'm on my own. So, you know. Well, 339 00:22:04,001 --> 00:22:05,668 - just the two of us. - Oh. Right. 340 00:22:05,670 --> 00:22:07,547 - Sorry. - Just in here. 341 00:22:12,510 --> 00:22:13,468 I'm, er... 342 00:22:13,470 --> 00:22:17,056 - I'm not sure I'm ready. - No, no. No, that's fine. 343 00:22:17,182 --> 00:22:18,641 That's fine. 344 00:22:35,533 --> 00:22:37,908 What my dad did last night... 345 00:22:37,910 --> 00:22:40,037 you'll have to excuse him. 346 00:22:41,206 --> 00:22:43,833 It takes us all in different ways. 347 00:22:43,958 --> 00:22:47,295 Oh. We know that, don't we, Arthur? 348 00:22:48,671 --> 00:22:51,297 It was nice to have something to take our mind off it 349 00:22:51,299 --> 00:22:52,590 to be honest. 350 00:22:56,012 --> 00:22:59,682 We should be apologising to him, really. 351 00:23:03,561 --> 00:23:05,311 Well, if I can make it up to you. 352 00:23:05,313 --> 00:23:07,148 No, no. It's all right. 353 00:23:13,112 --> 00:23:16,241 He probably thought you were millionaires. 354 00:23:17,909 --> 00:23:19,159 Rock stars. 355 00:23:19,161 --> 00:23:23,331 We had all of those records. He used to get them for us... 356 00:23:26,083 --> 00:23:26,999 You... you told him 357 00:23:27,001 --> 00:23:29,835 - about that. You... - Well, it... it's not a secret, 358 00:23:29,837 --> 00:23:31,381 is it? I mean... 359 00:23:31,464 --> 00:23:33,175 it was then, but... 360 00:23:40,265 --> 00:23:42,016 What are you doing? 361 00:23:42,099 --> 00:23:43,643 I know it was... 362 00:23:43,768 --> 00:23:44,809 what was it? I think it was 363 00:23:44,811 --> 00:23:47,562 - a couple hundred quid, was it? - No. Don't be daft. 364 00:23:47,564 --> 00:23:49,564 What are you talking about? 365 00:23:49,566 --> 00:23:50,565 Dad's side bet. 366 00:23:50,567 --> 00:23:53,820 - He shouldn't have done that. - Bet? 367 00:23:54,487 --> 00:23:55,361 He said it was... 368 00:23:55,363 --> 00:23:58,448 - a couple of hundred. - You bet hundreds of pounds 369 00:23:58,450 --> 00:24:01,953 - on a game of Scrabble? - Not hundreds. 370 00:24:02,870 --> 00:24:04,162 Two hundred. 371 00:24:04,164 --> 00:24:07,167 - I thought he was... - He took you. 372 00:24:07,334 --> 00:24:09,959 He took you for the fool you are. 373 00:24:09,961 --> 00:24:12,253 - He cheated. - I'm sure he did. 374 00:24:12,255 --> 00:24:13,087 No. 375 00:24:13,089 --> 00:24:15,215 He's just a lot cleverer than you are. 376 00:24:15,217 --> 00:24:16,131 You keep that, son. 377 00:24:16,133 --> 00:24:19,260 That's the price a fool has to pay for... 378 00:24:19,262 --> 00:24:21,095 for acting like a fool. 379 00:24:21,097 --> 00:24:23,015 That's the fool tax. 380 00:25:08,770 --> 00:25:11,437 It wasn't him. I knew it wouldn't be. 381 00:25:11,439 --> 00:25:13,941 All the best then. Come on. 382 00:25:22,409 --> 00:25:24,452 Are you sure you wouldn't... 383 00:25:25,537 --> 00:25:26,829 No. 384 00:25:34,546 --> 00:25:36,212 Let's hear the new jingle. 385 00:25:39,342 --> 00:25:41,929 Small Faces. Yes! 386 00:25:42,011 --> 00:25:44,595 Or in my case, Arthur somebody! 387 00:25:44,597 --> 00:25:47,307 So not particularly "yes" at all. 388 00:25:47,309 --> 00:25:51,354 I never thought of that. He probably sang this as well. 389 00:25:51,938 --> 00:25:54,106 - Why? - Why what? 390 00:25:54,566 --> 00:25:56,818 Second best of everything. 391 00:25:57,319 --> 00:25:59,109 You didn't let us touch the real albums, 392 00:25:59,111 --> 00:26:00,861 it was only the Pickwick ones. 393 00:26:00,863 --> 00:26:02,822 We played Scrobble not Scrabble... 394 00:26:02,824 --> 00:26:03,614 It was the same. 395 00:26:03,616 --> 00:26:05,200 We didn't get proper Lego. You always got us 396 00:26:05,202 --> 00:26:08,118 - some snide Lego. - Ah, now, that was just as good. 397 00:26:08,120 --> 00:26:12,081 - Never Airfix, always Revell. - Revell was more rock and roll. 398 00:26:12,083 --> 00:26:14,250 You didn't get us Action Man, you got us something 399 00:26:14,252 --> 00:26:19,131 called Action Joe, and he did not have grip hands. 400 00:26:20,049 --> 00:26:22,300 - Yeah, that wasn't good. - Subbuteo? 401 00:26:22,302 --> 00:26:25,636 - No, Chad Valley Big League. - Yes, yes. 402 00:26:25,638 --> 00:26:28,013 You've made your point. Go on. 403 00:26:28,015 --> 00:26:29,432 - What? - Well, you also didn't have 404 00:26:29,434 --> 00:26:34,105 a mother, did you? Just a dad. So, poor substitute there. 405 00:26:49,120 --> 00:26:50,913 Left hand down. 406 00:26:51,956 --> 00:26:52,872 I can manage. 407 00:26:52,874 --> 00:26:55,791 I could back a bloody Panzer out of here. 408 00:26:55,793 --> 00:26:57,335 What was that? 409 00:26:57,337 --> 00:27:01,216 I said get back in the car. Get out of the cold. 410 00:27:01,758 --> 00:27:02,673 Sure. 411 00:28:47,322 --> 00:28:49,449 Your father's back. 412 00:28:49,949 --> 00:28:52,410 It wasn't your Uncle Michael. 413 00:28:53,911 --> 00:28:55,955 I think he's relieved. 414 00:28:56,623 --> 00:29:00,752 Well, it's hard to know what's for the best isn't it. I mean... 415 00:29:01,503 --> 00:29:03,669 Well, obviously the best would be... 416 00:29:03,671 --> 00:29:06,922 if they found him and he was alive and well, 417 00:29:06,924 --> 00:29:09,135 having a lovely life. 418 00:29:12,514 --> 00:29:15,183 Or would it? I mean... 419 00:29:15,683 --> 00:29:17,642 That'd be hard, wouldn't it? 420 00:29:17,644 --> 00:29:20,895 To find out that he's been happy all this time and just, 421 00:29:20,897 --> 00:29:22,440 you know... 422 00:29:22,774 --> 00:29:24,317 shunning you. 423 00:29:24,442 --> 00:29:26,778 Letting you go through all this. 424 00:29:27,612 --> 00:29:29,781 Like the sightings. 425 00:29:30,114 --> 00:29:32,532 You know people contact your grandad 426 00:29:32,534 --> 00:29:35,495 and say they've seen Michael. 427 00:29:35,662 --> 00:29:38,163 Some of them say they've talked to him. 428 00:29:38,165 --> 00:29:41,332 There was one in Argentina. 429 00:29:41,334 --> 00:29:42,919 Imagine. 430 00:29:43,545 --> 00:29:44,835 I'm not saying... 431 00:29:44,837 --> 00:29:47,505 it'd be better if he was dead. 432 00:29:47,507 --> 00:29:50,927 I'm just saying if you had to choose. 433 00:30:51,028 --> 00:30:52,614 Everything okay? 434 00:30:53,906 --> 00:30:56,117 Have you been there long? 435 00:31:01,038 --> 00:31:02,915 Don't worry about it. 436 00:31:08,755 --> 00:31:09,504 Alan. 437 00:31:09,506 --> 00:31:12,382 It's lovely to see you. Have you eaten? Uh, 438 00:31:12,384 --> 00:31:14,800 there's plenty of left overs. I'll get you a bowl. 439 00:31:14,802 --> 00:31:16,511 That'd be lovely. If you're sure there's enough. 440 00:31:16,513 --> 00:31:19,847 I'd be just as happy with a bit of toast and Marmite. 441 00:31:19,849 --> 00:31:21,393 No, no... 442 00:31:25,772 --> 00:31:28,900 You know you can't take Marmite into Canada? 443 00:31:29,025 --> 00:31:31,276 Because Marmite has a secret ingredient. 444 00:31:31,278 --> 00:31:32,860 And the Canadian government took the view 445 00:31:32,862 --> 00:31:34,445 that not telling them the secret ingredient 446 00:31:34,447 --> 00:31:36,989 was tantamount to asking them to import something 447 00:31:36,991 --> 00:31:38,073 without knowing what it is. 448 00:31:38,075 --> 00:31:42,662 That's why the people of Canada have no Marmite. Imagine. 449 00:31:42,664 --> 00:31:44,914 The second largest country on Earth. 450 00:31:44,916 --> 00:31:47,208 More or less nine million square miles 451 00:31:47,210 --> 00:31:48,793 and not one jar of Marmite. 452 00:31:48,795 --> 00:31:51,756 - How do they survive? - Vegemite. 453 00:31:53,341 --> 00:31:55,092 A poor substitute... 454 00:31:55,218 --> 00:31:58,428 but then sometimes a poor substitute 455 00:31:58,430 --> 00:32:00,097 is all there is. 456 00:32:01,183 --> 00:32:02,973 - Is Jack out then? - Yeah. 457 00:32:02,975 --> 00:32:04,517 Upstairs. 458 00:32:04,519 --> 00:32:06,977 - Gaming. - That's a worry, isn't it? 459 00:32:06,979 --> 00:32:08,396 Why would that be a worry? 460 00:32:08,398 --> 00:32:11,816 He's at home. He's not on the streets. 461 00:32:11,818 --> 00:32:13,151 He hasn't gone missing. 462 00:32:13,153 --> 00:32:15,653 You didn't hear about the girl in China then? 463 00:32:15,655 --> 00:32:18,323 I did hear about the girl in China. 464 00:32:18,325 --> 00:32:21,617 - Imagine that. It is a worry. - I know China's different, 465 00:32:21,619 --> 00:32:22,993 - but... - Exactly. We don't want him 466 00:32:22,995 --> 00:32:25,330 - to end up like her. - You should watch him. 467 00:32:25,332 --> 00:32:26,497 - I do try. - This business 468 00:32:26,499 --> 00:32:28,916 is probably affecting him more than you think. 469 00:32:28,918 --> 00:32:30,293 - Do you think so? - No! 470 00:32:30,295 --> 00:32:32,337 - I think you might be right. - He's got exams! 471 00:32:32,339 --> 00:32:35,381 He's doing A-levels. They're stressed. 472 00:32:35,383 --> 00:32:36,632 They're all stressed. 473 00:32:36,634 --> 00:32:38,718 They're supposed to be stressed. 474 00:32:38,720 --> 00:32:41,011 If you can't be stressed about your A-levels 475 00:32:41,013 --> 00:32:42,472 what can you be stressed about? 476 00:32:42,474 --> 00:32:46,058 He doesn't seem stressed. He seems more, sort of, 477 00:32:46,060 --> 00:32:47,643 to be, you know... 478 00:32:47,645 --> 00:32:48,519 playing that game, 479 00:32:48,521 --> 00:32:52,106 - which does beg the question... - The girl in China question. 480 00:32:52,108 --> 00:32:53,485 Exactly. 481 00:33:05,830 --> 00:33:10,335 You know why he's saying Jack's stressed? 482 00:33:11,253 --> 00:33:12,545 No. 483 00:33:12,837 --> 00:33:15,131 Because he's stressed himself. 484 00:33:15,590 --> 00:33:16,381 Is he? 485 00:33:16,383 --> 00:33:19,384 Classic transference of anxiety. 486 00:33:19,386 --> 00:33:22,094 He was stressed on the drive then, was he? 487 00:33:22,096 --> 00:33:23,137 Oh, yeah. 488 00:33:23,139 --> 00:33:26,098 Very defensive. Quite guarded. 489 00:33:26,100 --> 00:33:29,687 Do you not find him a bit passive aggressive? 490 00:33:29,937 --> 00:33:34,609 I do, sometimes, but you have to make allowances. 491 00:33:48,373 --> 00:33:49,707 Oh. 492 00:33:50,833 --> 00:33:52,252 A present. 493 00:33:52,627 --> 00:33:55,380 That's kind of you, Alan. 494 00:33:57,840 --> 00:33:59,301 What is it? 495 00:33:59,717 --> 00:34:01,176 It's a thing. 496 00:34:01,178 --> 00:34:03,137 Doing labels. 497 00:34:05,348 --> 00:34:09,018 He was putting labels on everything when we were kids. 498 00:34:09,727 --> 00:34:10,435 "Jumpers only". 499 00:34:10,437 --> 00:34:12,937 "Please fold towels before replacing". 500 00:34:12,939 --> 00:34:14,647 "Please replace after use"... 501 00:34:14,649 --> 00:34:17,775 It helped keep things running smoothly, you know. 502 00:34:17,777 --> 00:34:20,736 But also the font, look... 503 00:34:20,738 --> 00:34:22,447 it has an elegant precision. 504 00:34:22,449 --> 00:34:24,865 You don't really see that font anywhere else. I don't know 505 00:34:24,867 --> 00:34:28,246 what it's called. But I thought you'd appreciate it. 506 00:34:36,003 --> 00:34:37,297 Well... 507 00:34:38,130 --> 00:34:39,672 it's getting late. 508 00:34:39,674 --> 00:34:41,259 Yeah, it is. 509 00:34:44,929 --> 00:34:47,682 Obviously, you're welcome to stay. 510 00:34:48,140 --> 00:34:49,892 Well you would be, 511 00:34:49,976 --> 00:34:51,603 only, um... 512 00:34:51,936 --> 00:34:54,562 we don't really have a spare bed, do we? 513 00:34:54,564 --> 00:34:57,315 Just the bunk in Jack's room, so. 514 00:34:57,317 --> 00:34:59,819 I'm sure that would be fine. 515 00:35:21,258 --> 00:35:22,759 Which is you? 516 00:35:23,009 --> 00:35:24,967 The one with the big cleavage, that's you? 517 00:35:24,969 --> 00:35:28,638 There is total sexual equality among the undead. 518 00:35:28,640 --> 00:35:31,974 It doesn't make any difference which gender you are. 519 00:35:31,976 --> 00:35:35,853 So why choose to be a girl with enormous breasts? 520 00:35:35,855 --> 00:35:39,984 - Stop saying things like that. - Not breasts. 521 00:35:41,110 --> 00:35:42,445 Bosoms. 522 00:35:43,112 --> 00:35:44,320 Assets. 523 00:35:44,322 --> 00:35:45,696 Glands. 524 00:35:45,698 --> 00:35:50,493 - Bazookas. Which do you prefer? - Other players are more polite 525 00:35:50,495 --> 00:35:51,827 to you if you're a girl. 526 00:35:51,829 --> 00:35:55,748 It looks a bit choppy if you don't mind me saying. 527 00:35:55,750 --> 00:35:58,293 - What? - It's not running very smoothly, 528 00:35:58,295 --> 00:36:00,545 is it? It's slow and then it's jumpy. 529 00:36:00,547 --> 00:36:02,380 Do you want me to change the settings for you? 530 00:36:02,382 --> 00:36:06,303 - I'm in the middle of an action. - Only take a mo. 531 00:36:55,935 --> 00:36:57,142 Grandad. 532 00:36:57,144 --> 00:36:59,689 - What? - That's my bed. 533 00:37:00,940 --> 00:37:01,856 Yeah? 534 00:37:01,858 --> 00:37:05,737 You didn't expect me to climb up there, did you? 535 00:37:06,238 --> 00:37:07,362 Or did you? 536 00:37:07,364 --> 00:37:08,946 I could give it a go. 537 00:37:08,948 --> 00:37:11,491 No, no. No, I didn't expect that, Grandad. 538 00:37:14,287 --> 00:37:16,289 I'm saying me prayers. 539 00:37:31,679 --> 00:37:33,348 Jack! 540 00:37:33,806 --> 00:37:35,141 What? 541 00:37:35,392 --> 00:37:36,684 Nothing. 542 00:37:36,768 --> 00:37:38,102 Nothing. 543 00:37:38,895 --> 00:37:39,519 We just... 544 00:37:39,521 --> 00:37:43,858 don't normally see you for breakfast, that's all. 545 00:37:56,871 --> 00:38:00,041 - Jack. - All right. All right. 546 00:38:00,375 --> 00:38:04,086 Grandad's up there and he's playing on my computer. 547 00:38:04,546 --> 00:38:06,631 Where else am I supposed to go? 548 00:38:07,048 --> 00:38:08,923 Well, I'm sure it's very difficult for you 549 00:38:08,925 --> 00:38:11,301 having Grandad in your bedroom, but... 550 00:38:11,303 --> 00:38:15,097 it's very nice for us having you for breakfast. 551 00:38:15,557 --> 00:38:18,601 Oh, I'll give you a lift if you like. 552 00:38:19,477 --> 00:38:20,726 Bye then! 553 00:38:20,728 --> 00:38:22,061 Why doesn't he want a lift? 554 00:38:22,063 --> 00:38:24,691 You drive past the school every day. 555 00:38:24,982 --> 00:38:26,191 There's a girl. 556 00:38:26,193 --> 00:38:26,982 Oh. 557 00:38:26,984 --> 00:38:29,902 He walks past two bus stops to be at the same bus stop 558 00:38:29,904 --> 00:38:33,283 as her. And he stands next to her... 559 00:38:33,408 --> 00:38:35,285 but he doesn't speak. 560 00:38:35,452 --> 00:38:36,576 Really? 561 00:38:36,578 --> 00:38:38,371 How do you know that? 562 00:38:39,581 --> 00:38:41,166 It's a guess. 563 00:39:01,853 --> 00:39:05,313 Yeah, man. Last night was quality. 564 00:39:05,315 --> 00:39:08,109 Yeah, we were going more or less all night. 565 00:39:08,360 --> 00:39:11,654 Oh, we just listened to music, 566 00:39:11,863 --> 00:39:12,987 jammed. 567 00:39:12,989 --> 00:39:14,239 Wrote a few new songs. 568 00:39:14,241 --> 00:39:16,574 It was a good night, man. 569 00:39:16,576 --> 00:39:18,286 Jack! 570 00:39:19,621 --> 00:39:20,997 Woo-hoo! 571 00:39:21,373 --> 00:39:23,040 Breakfast. 572 00:39:23,291 --> 00:39:26,878 Do let me know if that's not to your satisfaction. 573 00:39:33,176 --> 00:39:36,344 Half a million registered players. 574 00:39:36,346 --> 00:39:37,637 I'm never short of a game. 575 00:39:37,639 --> 00:39:40,975 Does that mean you'll be staying another night then? 576 00:39:41,768 --> 00:39:43,686 Unless it's a problem. 577 00:39:44,437 --> 00:39:46,856 No. No, it's not a problem. 578 00:39:47,982 --> 00:39:49,442 It's just... 579 00:39:50,902 --> 00:39:53,655 No, no, it's not a problem. 580 00:40:50,086 --> 00:40:54,090 Most of them play the board not the man. 581 00:40:57,093 --> 00:40:58,886 Always play the man. 582 00:40:59,471 --> 00:41:02,096 Go for two letter words. 583 00:41:02,098 --> 00:41:04,432 They're your real friends. 584 00:41:04,434 --> 00:41:06,226 There are 101 two letter words. 585 00:41:06,228 --> 00:41:10,355 Five of them are letters of the Greek alphabet 586 00:41:10,357 --> 00:41:15,360 Mu. M-U. Nu. N-U. Pi, obviously. 587 00:41:15,362 --> 00:41:17,237 And xi. X-I. 588 00:41:17,239 --> 00:41:21,532 And then you've got your unusual ones like O-E, oe 589 00:41:21,534 --> 00:41:24,535 which is a wind in the Faroe Islands. 590 00:41:24,537 --> 00:41:27,497 Did your father ever tell you about your great-grandmother's 591 00:41:27,499 --> 00:41:30,791 shop? She had a shop, sold all sorts. 592 00:41:30,793 --> 00:41:35,421 - Liquorice all sorts? - No, all sorts of things. 593 00:41:35,423 --> 00:41:36,881 Bread, the papers. 594 00:41:36,883 --> 00:41:41,679 Hair nets were big business, I seem to remember. Harpic. 595 00:41:42,639 --> 00:41:44,764 Are you telling me a bedtime story? 596 00:41:44,766 --> 00:41:46,724 I'm telling you your family history. 597 00:41:46,726 --> 00:41:50,102 Coal. She sold coal. People would ask for five pound 598 00:41:50,104 --> 00:41:53,063 of potatoes and a bag of coal. She'd go downstairs 599 00:41:53,065 --> 00:41:54,984 and get them the coal. 600 00:41:55,235 --> 00:41:55,733 Why? 601 00:41:55,735 --> 00:41:58,736 Why didn't she just keep it upstairs? 602 00:41:58,738 --> 00:42:00,571 Ah. That's the point. 603 00:42:00,573 --> 00:42:02,365 One day someone from the coal board, 604 00:42:02,367 --> 00:42:06,869 coal was nationalised then, heard about this and thought, 605 00:42:06,871 --> 00:42:11,499 "we don't deliver to that shop so how come she sells coal?" 606 00:42:11,501 --> 00:42:12,375 Go on. 607 00:42:12,377 --> 00:42:17,507 Well, it turns out there's a seam in the cellar. 608 00:42:17,674 --> 00:42:21,551 The cellar of the shop, one wall of it had a coal seam 609 00:42:21,553 --> 00:42:22,302 running off it. 610 00:42:22,304 --> 00:42:23,969 If you asked her for coal, she'd go down there, 611 00:42:23,971 --> 00:42:27,598 pick up a pick axe and chop out a bit of fresh coal for you. 612 00:42:27,600 --> 00:42:30,560 She was a part time freelance coal miner, 613 00:42:30,562 --> 00:42:31,811 your great-grandmother. 614 00:42:31,813 --> 00:42:35,481 That story is completely untrue. 615 00:42:35,483 --> 00:42:39,111 That story is as true as my name. 616 00:43:05,763 --> 00:43:06,262 Er. 617 00:43:06,264 --> 00:43:10,433 - Sorry I... I was just, um... - No, good idea. Give it a go. 618 00:43:10,435 --> 00:43:12,645 Which one do you like best? 619 00:43:31,289 --> 00:43:34,751 - I've never been in here before. - No. 620 00:43:52,519 --> 00:43:53,978 Stand straight. 621 00:43:54,812 --> 00:43:57,605 It's hard to gauge the fall of the trouser 622 00:43:57,607 --> 00:43:59,607 without proper shoes. 623 00:43:59,609 --> 00:44:01,651 It's got to be Oxfords, really. You might get away 624 00:44:01,653 --> 00:44:05,114 with a Chelsea boot. Have you got a Chelsea boot? 625 00:44:05,657 --> 00:44:08,115 I don't know what you're talking about. 626 00:44:08,117 --> 00:44:08,866 Ah. 627 00:44:08,868 --> 00:44:10,993 When this is done, the thing you have to remember 628 00:44:10,995 --> 00:44:16,168 about these buttons is, sometimes, always, never. 629 00:44:17,210 --> 00:44:17,750 What? 630 00:44:17,752 --> 00:44:19,335 The buttons, a man keeps fastened. Sometimes. 631 00:44:19,337 --> 00:44:23,005 Always. Never. Now take it off and we'll make it sing. 632 00:44:23,007 --> 00:44:28,680 You know how this suit needs a bit of a tidy up? A trim? 633 00:44:31,098 --> 00:44:33,935 Same thing goes for your hair. 634 00:45:05,258 --> 00:45:08,634 You look spruce. Doesn't he look spruce? 635 00:45:08,636 --> 00:45:11,013 Well, I wasn't sure it was him. 636 00:45:17,687 --> 00:45:20,022 Is it one of your grandad's? 637 00:45:21,816 --> 00:45:23,858 You haven't got a spare gun, have you? 638 00:45:23,860 --> 00:45:27,320 - So I can shoot myself. - Don't mutter. 639 00:45:27,322 --> 00:45:30,906 Your father mutters. It's not endearing 640 00:45:30,908 --> 00:45:33,035 and it's not effective. 641 00:45:35,538 --> 00:45:38,958 I know it's inconvenient with your grandad. 642 00:45:39,834 --> 00:45:41,751 It's not inconvenient. 643 00:45:41,753 --> 00:45:45,507 - It's disorientating. - Awkward. 644 00:45:46,799 --> 00:45:48,426 Destabilising. 645 00:45:48,551 --> 00:45:52,222 - Confusing? - Not confusing. 646 00:45:52,680 --> 00:45:54,182 Unsettling. 647 00:45:55,475 --> 00:45:57,101 Disquieting. 648 00:45:58,311 --> 00:45:59,435 Tense. 649 00:45:59,437 --> 00:46:01,731 Anyway it can't be helped. 650 00:46:02,940 --> 00:46:04,984 And er, well... 651 00:46:07,320 --> 00:46:09,406 you look spruce. 652 00:46:15,662 --> 00:46:19,372 Well, I would not want to play Scrabble with you. 653 00:46:19,374 --> 00:46:20,373 Really? 654 00:46:20,375 --> 00:46:23,085 - Wouldn't you? - Or your mum. 655 00:46:35,014 --> 00:46:36,349 Jack. 656 00:46:36,641 --> 00:46:38,685 Give you a lift if you like. 657 00:46:56,203 --> 00:46:59,829 So his brother went missing and ever since then... 658 00:46:59,831 --> 00:47:01,164 The prodigal son. 659 00:47:01,166 --> 00:47:03,249 - What? - Well, the prodigal son 660 00:47:03,251 --> 00:47:05,543 goes missing, and then comes back, 661 00:47:05,545 --> 00:47:08,546 and the dad kills the fatted calf and everything, 662 00:47:08,548 --> 00:47:09,422 gives him a ring. 663 00:47:09,424 --> 00:47:11,799 And then the other son, the one that actually stayed behind 664 00:47:11,801 --> 00:47:14,053 to help him, he gets nothing. 665 00:47:15,054 --> 00:47:16,848 I hate the prodigal son. 666 00:47:19,141 --> 00:47:20,893 Then you'll like my dad. 667 00:47:27,317 --> 00:47:30,111 - Um, are we in the way? - No. 668 00:47:30,278 --> 00:47:31,486 No, it's fine. 669 00:47:31,488 --> 00:47:35,992 - Are you eating with us? - Is that okay? 670 00:47:36,784 --> 00:47:40,119 Yeah. And you can carry on after food. 671 00:47:40,121 --> 00:47:42,624 I'll have well beaten him by then. 672 00:48:12,612 --> 00:48:13,946 Good. 673 00:48:14,572 --> 00:48:16,073 Good game plan. 674 00:48:17,784 --> 00:48:18,991 Play the man not the board. 675 00:48:18,993 --> 00:48:24,081 - She's a girl, grandad. - Me too, as a matter of fact. 676 00:48:24,416 --> 00:48:25,498 "Zo"? 677 00:48:25,500 --> 00:48:27,375 You can't have that. Zoo's got two O's. 678 00:48:27,377 --> 00:48:31,796 - No. Actually, zo is a word. - Are you sure? 679 00:48:31,798 --> 00:48:35,508 Definitely zo's a word. What's that? 680 00:48:35,510 --> 00:48:37,262 "Oxycamphors". 681 00:48:37,637 --> 00:48:38,928 What's an oxycamphor? 682 00:48:38,930 --> 00:48:42,557 It's a chemical. I'm a chemist, Alan. Remember. 683 00:48:42,559 --> 00:48:43,683 I'd check that if I were you. 684 00:48:43,685 --> 00:48:46,313 We're not checking anything. 685 00:48:47,647 --> 00:48:49,106 She's a chemist. 686 00:48:49,232 --> 00:48:52,610 If she says oxycamphors is a chemical... 687 00:48:52,860 --> 00:48:54,194 it's a chemical. 688 00:48:54,196 --> 00:48:55,903 I don't mind people checking. 689 00:48:55,905 --> 00:48:59,242 Anything that spins the game out to be honest. 690 00:49:00,117 --> 00:49:01,617 "Gu" by the way... 691 00:49:01,619 --> 00:49:03,453 is a traditional stringed instrument 692 00:49:03,455 --> 00:49:06,789 - from the Shetland Islands. - I'm impressed. 693 00:49:06,791 --> 00:49:09,085 But I still want to check it. 694 00:49:10,212 --> 00:49:13,421 I also want to know if the dictionary tells us 695 00:49:13,423 --> 00:49:14,839 why Jack would ever know the name 696 00:49:14,841 --> 00:49:18,926 of a traditional string thing from the Falklands. 697 00:49:18,928 --> 00:49:20,472 Shetlands. 698 00:49:20,638 --> 00:49:22,597 And what's "yo"? 699 00:49:22,599 --> 00:49:24,807 You can't have yo. What is it? 700 00:49:24,809 --> 00:49:28,896 - Clearly, it's half a yo-yo. - It's a greeting. 701 00:49:29,439 --> 00:49:30,980 Greetings are allowed. 702 00:49:30,982 --> 00:49:33,693 Thank you, Mr. Jack's Dad. 703 00:49:34,194 --> 00:49:36,402 There it is. Oxycamphor. You were right. 704 00:49:36,404 --> 00:49:38,238 She knows damn well she's right. 705 00:49:38,240 --> 00:49:40,367 What are you talking about? 706 00:49:40,992 --> 00:49:42,783 What was the next one, "yo"? 707 00:49:42,785 --> 00:49:44,704 Don't look that up. 708 00:49:45,121 --> 00:49:48,914 I just said it's a greeting and greetings are allowed. 709 00:49:48,916 --> 00:49:53,253 You were forever using "hi" and "ho". You know "yo" is okay. 710 00:49:53,255 --> 00:49:56,549 Did you really play "ho", Grandad? 711 00:49:56,966 --> 00:49:58,216 As in... 712 00:49:58,218 --> 00:49:59,802 "hos and cars". 713 00:50:02,430 --> 00:50:04,013 I said, don't look that up. 714 00:50:04,015 --> 00:50:06,976 Dad! You're not even playing. 715 00:50:35,172 --> 00:50:36,212 Dad? 716 00:51:43,906 --> 00:51:46,909 Sue? 717 00:51:48,370 --> 00:51:49,996 Sue is that you? 718 00:51:51,038 --> 00:51:52,582 Peter! 719 00:51:53,250 --> 00:51:54,749 It's me. Your dad. 720 00:51:54,751 --> 00:51:56,751 Sorry. 721 00:51:56,753 --> 00:51:58,253 You all right? 722 00:51:58,255 --> 00:52:00,465 Yeah, I was just passing. 723 00:52:05,678 --> 00:52:08,012 You don't have to get out. It's fine. 724 00:52:08,014 --> 00:52:12,225 - My house, your house. - I was finished anyway. 725 00:52:12,227 --> 00:52:13,936 Cup of tea? 726 00:52:14,937 --> 00:52:16,898 I just wanted to say... 727 00:52:17,482 --> 00:52:19,108 about last night. 728 00:52:19,859 --> 00:52:24,111 It's fine. No problem. Come on. Cup of tea. 729 00:52:24,113 --> 00:52:25,905 I don't know how we keep... 730 00:52:25,907 --> 00:52:29,452 rubbing each other up, you know, the wrong way. 731 00:52:29,911 --> 00:52:32,664 I think it's to do with Michael, isn't it? 732 00:52:32,747 --> 00:52:34,166 Probably. 733 00:52:34,291 --> 00:52:37,252 Hey, come and look at this. 734 00:52:40,713 --> 00:52:43,464 Don't worry about me trying to communicate with you 735 00:52:43,466 --> 00:52:45,009 or anything. 736 00:52:56,771 --> 00:52:59,649 Where have you seen those words before? 737 00:53:00,358 --> 00:53:01,651 Erm. 738 00:53:01,818 --> 00:53:03,736 In a game of Scrabble. 739 00:53:04,404 --> 00:53:06,823 Our Michael used to play them. 740 00:53:09,242 --> 00:53:10,577 What? 741 00:53:11,994 --> 00:53:14,456 All good players use those words. 742 00:53:15,081 --> 00:53:17,250 They're two letter words. 743 00:53:17,959 --> 00:53:20,084 You've got them written down here. 744 00:53:20,086 --> 00:53:22,587 It's him. I'm sure of it. 745 00:53:22,589 --> 00:53:24,422 He's fast and he's got lovely words 746 00:53:24,424 --> 00:53:25,715 and he always maximises the score. 747 00:53:25,717 --> 00:53:28,050 And he's not sentimental, you know. He doesn't just play 748 00:53:28,052 --> 00:53:30,678 a word because it looks nice. It's him. 749 00:53:30,680 --> 00:53:35,350 "Zo". He played zo that night. You said there was no such word 750 00:53:35,352 --> 00:53:37,562 and that's when he walked out. 751 00:53:40,106 --> 00:53:41,272 What? 752 00:53:41,274 --> 00:53:44,777 You said there was no such word and that's what... 753 00:53:50,367 --> 00:53:52,118 Are you blaming me? 754 00:53:56,289 --> 00:53:57,455 Who... 755 00:53:57,457 --> 00:53:58,706 - What? - I told you to stay 756 00:53:58,708 --> 00:54:01,125 - in the bathroom. - I did stay in there, 757 00:54:01,127 --> 00:54:03,794 but I was turning into a prune in that bath. 758 00:54:03,796 --> 00:54:08,134 Anyway, why should I hide? Done nothing wrong. 759 00:54:09,135 --> 00:54:11,679 I know you. I've met you. 760 00:54:11,971 --> 00:54:14,389 - You're married. - Not any more, son. 761 00:54:14,391 --> 00:54:16,432 Looking for our Nigel was the only thing 762 00:54:16,434 --> 00:54:18,142 that kept us together... 763 00:54:18,144 --> 00:54:20,188 and once we found him... 764 00:54:21,523 --> 00:54:25,277 recriminations, boredom, you name it. 765 00:54:26,444 --> 00:54:28,738 What, what have you been... 766 00:54:32,492 --> 00:54:34,202 Have you had sex? 767 00:54:34,286 --> 00:54:36,035 - Have you had sex in my bed? - Well, we weren't going 768 00:54:36,037 --> 00:54:38,329 to have sex in Jack's bed, were we? It's a bunk bed. 769 00:54:38,331 --> 00:54:41,582 I'm not Tarzan. Anyway, it didn't feel right, did it, 770 00:54:41,584 --> 00:54:43,753 having sex in the kid's room? 771 00:54:44,754 --> 00:54:46,296 You had sex in my bed? 772 00:54:46,298 --> 00:54:50,425 How could you do that? Even I don't have sex in my bed. 773 00:54:50,427 --> 00:54:52,468 - Don't you? - Son... 774 00:54:52,470 --> 00:54:55,012 you must ask yourself why you're making so much fuss. 775 00:54:55,014 --> 00:54:57,725 I mean, what harm are we doing? 776 00:54:58,142 --> 00:55:00,601 Anyway you should be proud of your dad. 777 00:55:00,603 --> 00:55:03,438 Let me tell you, he's a very considerate 778 00:55:03,440 --> 00:55:06,106 - and accomplished lover. - Oh, God. Shut up. 779 00:55:06,108 --> 00:55:07,233 - No, seriously. - Please. 780 00:55:07,235 --> 00:55:08,359 - He's got empathy. - Please. 781 00:55:08,361 --> 00:55:10,863 - No one has ever... - Please stop talking. 782 00:55:14,159 --> 00:55:15,702 I'm gonna go. 783 00:55:17,370 --> 00:55:20,790 And when I come back this hasn't happened. 784 00:55:21,416 --> 00:55:22,750 Okay? 785 00:55:38,600 --> 00:55:40,142 Yeah. 786 00:55:40,560 --> 00:55:43,143 Yeah, yeah. You see the thing is, 787 00:55:43,145 --> 00:55:45,940 the traffic is horrendous. 788 00:55:46,358 --> 00:55:48,818 Mm-hmm. I mean really. 789 00:55:49,944 --> 00:55:51,319 So let's reschedule. 790 00:55:51,321 --> 00:55:54,532 Then I can, er, get my ducks in a row. 791 00:55:55,908 --> 00:55:58,203 No, I don't mean literal ducks. 792 00:56:00,037 --> 00:56:02,374 No I... I don't do ducks. 793 00:56:04,376 --> 00:56:06,753 I don't do chipmunks either. 794 00:56:06,961 --> 00:56:08,919 Chipmunks are, I mean chipmunks 795 00:56:08,921 --> 00:56:12,133 aren't even an indigenous species. 796 00:56:12,634 --> 00:56:15,762 And we've already agreed on squirrels. 797 00:56:16,221 --> 00:56:19,432 Hmm. Squirrels eating ice cream. 798 00:56:20,267 --> 00:56:22,394 Who's not gonna love that? 799 00:56:41,704 --> 00:56:43,165 What? 800 00:56:58,346 --> 00:56:59,681 Alan. 801 00:57:01,391 --> 00:57:02,850 No problem. 802 00:57:28,376 --> 00:57:30,170 Grandad's gone. 803 00:57:30,462 --> 00:57:32,672 Gone? Gone where? 804 00:57:32,755 --> 00:57:33,379 Gone gone. 805 00:57:33,381 --> 00:57:37,635 His bags are gone. The lot. He's not answering his phone. 806 00:57:37,844 --> 00:57:38,468 He's left. 807 00:57:38,470 --> 00:57:41,262 Did you say something to him. Have you had a row? 808 00:57:41,264 --> 00:57:42,597 What? No. Ask him. 809 00:57:42,599 --> 00:57:46,476 I never said anything to him apart from "goodnight". 810 00:57:46,478 --> 00:57:47,435 We have to find him. 811 00:57:47,437 --> 00:57:49,939 What do you mean we have to find him? 812 00:57:50,022 --> 00:57:51,689 He's a missing person. 813 00:57:51,691 --> 00:57:53,358 What are you on about, he's a missing person? 814 00:57:53,360 --> 00:57:56,319 He's a grown man. He's gone back to his own home. 815 00:57:56,321 --> 00:57:59,197 I don't know why he left it in the first place. 816 00:57:59,199 --> 00:57:59,822 Mum. 817 00:57:59,824 --> 00:58:03,159 - We should find him. - Definitely. Erm. 818 00:58:03,161 --> 00:58:06,206 What? Have you both gone crazy? 819 00:58:06,373 --> 00:58:07,330 He didn't live here. 820 00:58:07,332 --> 00:58:09,582 Therefore the fact that he's not here 821 00:58:09,584 --> 00:58:10,958 does not make him lost. 822 00:58:10,960 --> 00:58:12,668 On the contrary, it means he's gone back 823 00:58:12,670 --> 00:58:15,171 - to where he's supposed to be. - How do you know that 824 00:58:15,173 --> 00:58:16,922 if he's not answering his phone? 825 00:58:16,924 --> 00:58:18,883 Maybe you should go round and check. 826 00:58:18,885 --> 00:58:20,468 He's lived in that house for 50 years. 827 00:58:20,470 --> 00:58:24,722 Not once in all of that time have I ever considered going 828 00:58:24,724 --> 00:58:27,477 to see if he's still living there. 829 00:58:32,440 --> 00:58:33,775 What? 830 00:58:50,542 --> 00:58:51,876 Dad? 831 00:59:58,193 --> 00:59:59,275 - Is he in? - No, he's not. 832 00:59:59,277 --> 01:00:00,693 - Do you know where... - Where is he? 833 01:00:00,695 --> 01:00:02,947 I don't know where he is. Do you? 834 01:00:03,114 --> 01:00:06,574 - He's not in there. I've looked. - I know but... 835 01:00:06,576 --> 01:00:08,784 can I have a look around? I've never been inside. 836 01:00:08,786 --> 01:00:11,454 - He's funny about it. - Well, if he's funny about it, 837 01:00:11,456 --> 01:00:14,626 it's not for me to be serious about it, is it? 838 01:00:14,751 --> 01:00:15,291 But... 839 01:00:15,293 --> 01:00:18,380 well I thought there might be, you know, 840 01:00:18,713 --> 01:00:19,337 a clue. 841 01:00:19,339 --> 01:00:23,174 If he's not said where he is, maybe he doesn't want you 842 01:00:23,176 --> 01:00:24,592 to know where he is. 843 01:00:24,594 --> 01:00:28,179 We're supposed to be going to this thing in Chester. 844 01:00:28,181 --> 01:00:31,268 He bought me tickets. A present. 845 01:00:31,351 --> 01:00:32,933 Why would he buy them and not turn up? 846 01:00:32,935 --> 01:00:36,314 Why does he do most of the things he does? 847 01:00:37,106 --> 01:00:39,984 Has he talked to you about this, um... 848 01:00:40,067 --> 01:00:43,153 - Skinny what's-his-name? - Thesaurus. 849 01:00:43,155 --> 01:00:45,070 He doesn't know anything about him. 850 01:00:45,072 --> 01:00:46,906 Says he wants to meet him. Everyone knows 851 01:00:46,908 --> 01:00:48,241 you should never arrange to meet someone 852 01:00:48,243 --> 01:00:50,493 that you only know from the internet. 853 01:00:50,495 --> 01:00:51,286 It's dangerous. 854 01:00:51,288 --> 01:00:52,953 There was that girl, wasn't there, from Barnsley, 855 01:00:52,955 --> 01:00:56,916 ran off with some guy who turned out to be 30 stone. 856 01:00:56,918 --> 01:00:58,168 She was only 14. 857 01:00:58,170 --> 01:01:02,213 I don't think anyone's been sexually grooming my dad. 858 01:01:02,215 --> 01:01:02,838 No, 859 01:01:02,840 --> 01:01:07,804 but what if this Skinny fella turns out to be a kid? 860 01:01:08,095 --> 01:01:09,262 And people, um... 861 01:01:09,264 --> 01:01:13,100 think it's your dad who's doing the abducting? 862 01:01:14,394 --> 01:01:15,770 Jesus. 863 01:01:31,244 --> 01:01:32,745 Is this you? 864 01:01:38,835 --> 01:01:39,500 Yeah. 865 01:01:39,502 --> 01:01:41,963 - That's me and... - Michael. 866 01:01:42,339 --> 01:01:44,131 The one who ran away. 867 01:01:46,008 --> 01:01:46,966 Is that him? 868 01:01:46,968 --> 01:01:48,803 That's him. 869 01:01:49,179 --> 01:01:50,805 The prodigal son. 870 01:01:55,393 --> 01:01:56,642 Are you okay? 871 01:01:58,188 --> 01:02:01,191 - Wait. I'll just get a, er... - I'm... 872 01:02:01,441 --> 01:02:02,900 I'm fine. 873 01:02:09,157 --> 01:02:11,159 I'm not fine at all. 874 01:02:25,715 --> 01:02:27,008 Arthur? 875 01:02:27,342 --> 01:02:31,929 Arthur, I'm... I'm so sorry. 876 01:02:32,514 --> 01:02:36,643 I don't know. I don't know what I was thinking of. 877 01:02:36,893 --> 01:02:39,020 I need you. 878 01:02:40,062 --> 01:02:44,151 I'm so sorry. Could you come and pick me up? 879 01:03:06,047 --> 01:03:07,340 Hi. 880 01:03:13,095 --> 01:03:15,012 I came here and I... 881 01:03:15,014 --> 01:03:17,350 I saw these pictures and... 882 01:03:18,518 --> 01:03:19,934 that's his... 883 01:03:19,936 --> 01:03:21,101 I remembered being in the morgue 884 01:03:21,103 --> 01:03:23,020 - looking at... - All right. 885 01:03:23,022 --> 01:03:24,607 It's okay. 886 01:03:25,608 --> 01:03:28,110 What was I thinking of? 887 01:03:28,195 --> 01:03:31,111 Is he mentally enfeebled in any way? 888 01:03:31,113 --> 01:03:33,281 No more than he ever was. 889 01:03:33,283 --> 01:03:35,618 Confused at all? 890 01:03:35,993 --> 01:03:38,869 No more than the rest of us. 891 01:03:38,871 --> 01:03:40,037 I can take his details. 892 01:03:40,039 --> 01:03:42,790 - I'll get you a photo. - If we get an unidentified body 893 01:03:42,792 --> 01:03:45,793 or an injured person that matches the description 894 01:03:45,795 --> 01:03:47,253 then sure, we can give you a call 895 01:03:47,255 --> 01:03:49,839 - and ask you to come and... - Don't do that. 896 01:03:49,841 --> 01:03:52,760 - I don't want to do that. - Well then... 897 01:03:53,135 --> 01:03:53,843 to be honest... 898 01:03:53,845 --> 01:03:56,971 he's hale and hearty. He's past the age of consent. 899 01:03:56,973 --> 01:03:59,890 Unless he's waving round unlicensed fire arms or driving 900 01:03:59,892 --> 01:04:02,560 without due care and attention, then I don't see... 901 01:04:02,562 --> 01:04:04,689 Well, I know. I know. 902 01:04:06,941 --> 01:04:08,566 You know one night... 903 01:04:08,568 --> 01:04:10,276 my son went missing. 904 01:04:10,278 --> 01:04:13,112 He got in a big nark and walked out of the room. 905 01:04:13,114 --> 01:04:14,905 We were watchingTop Gear. 906 01:04:14,907 --> 01:04:18,909 I told him to stop talking over it. Off he went. 907 01:04:18,911 --> 01:04:22,413 Banged the door. Then he never came back. 908 01:04:22,415 --> 01:04:24,832 State of panic. Rang all his mates. 909 01:04:24,834 --> 01:04:28,419 I was driving round the streets looking for him. Wife in tears. 910 01:04:28,421 --> 01:04:29,920 - You've no idea. - Yes, I have. 911 01:04:29,922 --> 01:04:33,716 I'm driving round and I am literally shaking. 912 01:04:33,718 --> 01:04:35,801 I call the station. Got people on it. Didn't know 913 01:04:35,803 --> 01:04:39,972 what else to do. And then I went up to his bedroom. 914 01:04:39,974 --> 01:04:41,432 - I know. - No, no. 915 01:04:41,434 --> 01:04:43,645 I went up to his bedroom... 916 01:04:44,103 --> 01:04:46,063 and he were fast asleep. 917 01:04:47,274 --> 01:04:49,151 He'd gone straight to bed. 918 01:04:49,942 --> 01:04:51,903 There he was all cosy. 919 01:04:53,070 --> 01:04:54,656 It happens. 920 01:04:57,242 --> 01:04:58,951 Not all the time. 921 01:05:53,005 --> 01:05:56,048 - Jack's found him. - What? He's here? 922 01:05:56,050 --> 01:05:57,342 No. He's not here. 923 01:05:57,344 --> 01:05:59,719 He synced his phone with my desktop. 924 01:05:59,721 --> 01:06:05,518 He had "Find My Phone" turned on. So, if I go here. 925 01:06:06,978 --> 01:06:08,186 That's him. 926 01:06:08,188 --> 01:06:10,022 That's where he is. 927 01:06:10,190 --> 01:06:11,691 Where is that? 928 01:06:12,192 --> 01:06:15,153 Somewhere near Ainsdale. 929 01:06:16,363 --> 01:06:18,404 Well then, he's fine then, isn't he? 930 01:06:18,406 --> 01:06:20,740 He's just gone to go and get away from it all. 931 01:06:20,742 --> 01:06:23,909 That's where we used to go on holiday when we were kids. 932 01:06:23,911 --> 01:06:25,995 What if he's gone to meet someone? 933 01:06:25,997 --> 01:06:26,746 What? 934 01:06:26,748 --> 01:06:29,582 He talked about going to meet some guy off the internet. 935 01:06:29,584 --> 01:06:31,751 He's not gone to meet some guy off the internet. 936 01:06:31,753 --> 01:06:35,257 What's a guy off the internet doing in Ainsdale? 937 01:06:35,548 --> 01:06:36,088 What? 938 01:06:36,090 --> 01:06:38,924 That explains why he's not answering his phone. 939 01:06:38,926 --> 01:06:40,887 He's got no signal. 940 01:06:41,471 --> 01:06:43,390 You don't even care. 941 01:06:44,474 --> 01:06:46,056 You don't even care one little bit. 942 01:06:46,058 --> 01:06:47,267 Well, what do you want me to do? 943 01:06:47,269 --> 01:06:50,730 He's gone on a jolly. You just said. 944 01:06:54,609 --> 01:06:57,237 I know my dad better than you. 945 01:06:58,280 --> 01:07:00,573 And I know he's okay. 946 01:07:02,492 --> 01:07:04,952 But I'm going to go up there. 947 01:07:05,370 --> 01:07:08,538 But I'm doing it for you. Not him. 948 01:07:08,540 --> 01:07:09,999 Okay? 949 01:07:47,204 --> 01:07:48,705 "Nissom." 950 01:07:50,623 --> 01:07:52,124 What's that? 951 01:07:53,626 --> 01:07:55,378 It's just a nice word. 952 01:07:56,338 --> 01:07:57,839 I'm just... 953 01:07:59,882 --> 01:08:01,426 Favourite words. 954 01:08:07,599 --> 01:08:10,852 Do you know what my favourite word is? 955 01:08:12,562 --> 01:08:14,314 No, I don't. 956 01:08:16,191 --> 01:08:17,609 Soap. 957 01:08:20,487 --> 01:08:21,946 Soap. 958 01:08:24,824 --> 01:08:26,073 Go on. 959 01:08:26,075 --> 01:08:27,785 Give it a go. 960 01:08:31,956 --> 01:08:33,291 Soap. 961 01:08:35,293 --> 01:08:37,420 - Soap. - Soap. 962 01:08:42,509 --> 01:08:44,636 Small pleasures, eh? 963 01:09:27,011 --> 01:09:28,513 Dad? 964 01:09:42,944 --> 01:09:44,279 Alan? 965 01:11:28,508 --> 01:11:29,884 Alan! 966 01:11:37,934 --> 01:11:39,269 Alan! 967 01:11:49,279 --> 01:11:49,777 Dad! 968 01:11:49,779 --> 01:11:52,197 You broke his heart, you know? 969 01:11:52,199 --> 01:11:54,449 All he ever talked about was you. 970 01:11:54,451 --> 01:11:58,118 Doesn't matter what conversational gambit 971 01:11:58,120 --> 01:11:59,204 you try. 972 01:11:59,206 --> 01:12:01,916 The tides, the weather... 973 01:12:02,209 --> 01:12:05,293 European fishing quotas, the sudden appearance 974 01:12:05,295 --> 01:12:07,795 of bottle nosed dolphins. 975 01:12:07,797 --> 01:12:11,924 The mating habits of the North Atlantic grey seal. 976 01:12:11,926 --> 01:12:16,262 It all comes back to you. I, I wish he was here... 977 01:12:16,264 --> 01:12:17,847 I'm his other son. 978 01:12:17,849 --> 01:12:21,228 - What? - The one who didn't run away. 979 01:12:22,187 --> 01:12:24,103 The one he's been staying with. 980 01:12:24,105 --> 01:12:28,318 The one he went to possibly identify the body with. 981 01:12:29,444 --> 01:12:33,781 I've got a son, Jack. He's quite close to my dad. 982 01:12:34,366 --> 01:12:36,407 - My wife Sue? - No, mate. 983 01:12:36,409 --> 01:12:38,159 Well, we're a bit worried about him. We were worried 984 01:12:38,161 --> 01:12:40,161 that he might have gone off in a distracted state 985 01:12:40,163 --> 01:12:42,207 and done something you know... 986 01:12:42,665 --> 01:12:44,081 Hang on a minute. 987 01:12:44,083 --> 01:12:46,709 How do I know that you're his son? 988 01:12:46,711 --> 01:12:50,546 How do I know that you're not the tax. Or the police. 989 01:12:50,548 --> 01:12:51,964 Why would the police be after him? 990 01:12:51,966 --> 01:12:55,220 I don't know. He's an awkward bugger. 991 01:12:55,387 --> 01:12:56,093 He's my dad. 992 01:12:56,095 --> 01:13:00,267 We're worried about him. Just tell me what you know. 993 01:13:02,101 --> 01:13:06,937 Yeah. Yeah. Now I see it. You're the very image of him 994 01:13:06,939 --> 01:13:08,731 when you get narky. 995 01:13:08,733 --> 01:13:10,650 - He's out. - I know he's out. 996 01:13:10,652 --> 01:13:11,984 That's why I'm worried about him. 997 01:13:11,986 --> 01:13:15,155 Why you worried? He's a very experienced sailor, 998 01:13:15,157 --> 01:13:16,658 isn't he? 999 01:13:17,492 --> 01:13:19,825 - Is he? - Yeah. 1000 01:13:19,827 --> 01:13:21,411 Storms and gales, 1001 01:13:21,413 --> 01:13:24,121 he's had the lot, him and that little boat. 1002 01:13:24,123 --> 01:13:27,752 Yeah. Very experienced. Very experienced. 1003 01:13:44,352 --> 01:13:46,271 What are you looking for? 1004 01:13:47,522 --> 01:13:51,568 What have I been looking for all these last years? 1005 01:13:52,485 --> 01:13:56,948 When I put on my coat and walk and walk and walk. 1006 01:14:00,285 --> 01:14:03,120 What do you think I was looking for? 1007 01:14:07,875 --> 01:14:09,877 I remember you doing it. 1008 01:14:11,379 --> 01:14:14,799 But I didn't know what you were doing at the time. 1009 01:14:15,091 --> 01:14:17,885 I thought all dads did that, you know. 1010 01:14:21,138 --> 01:14:23,891 I didn't know where else to look. 1011 01:14:25,477 --> 01:14:27,437 Apart from everywhere. 1012 01:14:29,689 --> 01:14:32,192 They tell you to think about... 1013 01:14:32,400 --> 01:14:34,861 everything you know about them. 1014 01:14:38,365 --> 01:14:40,158 But it turns out... 1015 01:14:43,453 --> 01:14:45,455 I didn't know that much. 1016 01:14:48,208 --> 01:14:50,418 Only the Scrabble thing. 1017 01:14:50,543 --> 01:14:53,085 And I don't even know if he liked Scrabble 1018 01:14:53,087 --> 01:14:54,839 that much just... 1019 01:14:55,632 --> 01:14:58,048 it stuck in my mind, because he walked out 1020 01:14:58,050 --> 01:15:00,136 in the middle of a game. 1021 01:15:02,096 --> 01:15:04,432 I should've gone after him. 1022 01:15:08,102 --> 01:15:10,104 You were in a nark. 1023 01:15:10,813 --> 01:15:12,940 I should have gone after him. 1024 01:15:14,066 --> 01:15:17,111 That's true. I never thought of that. 1025 01:15:20,865 --> 01:15:23,535 I hate Scrabble. 1026 01:15:25,162 --> 01:15:27,245 You think it's going to be about the words 1027 01:15:27,247 --> 01:15:29,582 but it's just about the numbers. 1028 01:15:31,334 --> 01:15:34,252 You think you're going to be playing lagoon 1029 01:15:34,254 --> 01:15:36,005 and lambent... 1030 01:15:37,465 --> 01:15:38,925 or soap... 1031 01:15:41,219 --> 01:15:44,055 but it's all Mu, Pi... 1032 01:15:45,598 --> 01:15:47,265 Za and Zo. 1033 01:15:47,267 --> 01:15:51,436 Nobody leaves home over a game of Scrabble. 1034 01:15:51,438 --> 01:15:54,023 It wasn't about the Scrabble. 1035 01:15:55,775 --> 01:15:58,695 The Scrabble was just the occasion. 1036 01:15:59,654 --> 01:16:01,198 It was Mum. 1037 01:16:02,699 --> 01:16:04,701 As soon as Mum died... 1038 01:16:04,992 --> 01:16:07,912 he was just angry all the time. 1039 01:16:15,378 --> 01:16:17,587 Something bad happened to him, 1040 01:16:17,589 --> 01:16:20,130 when I should've been protecting him. 1041 01:16:20,132 --> 01:16:22,219 Dad, we don't know that. 1042 01:16:25,722 --> 01:16:29,642 And then this Skinny Thesaurus started. 1043 01:16:29,892 --> 01:16:31,936 I mean, look at this. 1044 01:16:33,730 --> 01:16:36,314 He plays exactly like our Michael. 1045 01:16:36,316 --> 01:16:38,107 Same words sometimes. 1046 01:16:38,109 --> 01:16:39,942 I've been playing him. 1047 01:16:39,944 --> 01:16:40,860 I know I have. 1048 01:16:40,862 --> 01:16:44,324 He's found me. Or I've found him. 1049 01:16:44,616 --> 01:16:46,201 And if he is... 1050 01:16:47,577 --> 01:16:51,038 you know, I've been playing a ghost. 1051 01:16:51,998 --> 01:16:53,914 All good players play the same way. 1052 01:16:53,916 --> 01:16:57,420 Yeah, until the other day, and then, look. 1053 01:16:59,130 --> 01:17:00,632 Look at this. 1054 01:17:01,132 --> 01:17:03,341 Marauder. Down the side there. 1055 01:17:03,343 --> 01:17:06,386 Would you waste a "u" on a word like that? 1056 01:17:06,388 --> 01:17:08,888 Marauder is the name of our caravan. 1057 01:17:08,890 --> 01:17:10,931 - He's trying to talk to me. - Dad. 1058 01:17:10,933 --> 01:17:12,475 - So I messaged him. - Dad. 1059 01:17:12,477 --> 01:17:13,476 I'm going to meet him. 1060 01:17:13,478 --> 01:17:14,810 - Dad, don't do that. - Look here, 1061 01:17:14,812 --> 01:17:16,521 - there's the message. - Everybody knows you shouldn't. 1062 01:17:16,523 --> 01:17:18,231 Well, what have I got to be scared of? The only thing 1063 01:17:18,233 --> 01:17:21,819 I'm scared of is dying before I sort this out. 1064 01:19:50,218 --> 01:19:51,803 Hello, son. 1065 01:19:59,352 --> 01:20:00,853 Fancy a game? 1066 01:20:09,362 --> 01:20:12,449 - Where did you get that? - eBay. 1067 01:20:42,729 --> 01:20:46,146 We've been playing each other for weeks, haven't we? 1068 01:20:46,148 --> 01:20:49,236 - What? - You're him, aren't you? 1069 01:20:49,527 --> 01:20:51,529 Skinny Thesaurus. 1070 01:20:54,366 --> 01:20:55,783 I'm sorry. 1071 01:20:56,284 --> 01:20:57,533 I'm all there is. 1072 01:20:57,535 --> 01:21:00,830 The PickwickTop of The Pops of sons. 1073 01:21:01,038 --> 01:21:02,205 It's all right. 1074 01:21:02,207 --> 01:21:05,460 I'm the Chad Valley Big League of Dads. 1075 01:21:17,805 --> 01:21:20,558 This is bloody useless, isn't it? 1076 01:21:20,933 --> 01:21:22,433 The pieces are too flimsy. 1077 01:21:22,435 --> 01:21:26,189 They get crumpled when you try to pick them up, look... 1078 01:21:26,398 --> 01:21:29,440 Well, that's all there is. If you want to play then, 1079 01:21:29,442 --> 01:21:30,150 that's it. 1080 01:21:30,152 --> 01:21:32,904 Have to make the best of it then. 1081 01:21:40,370 --> 01:21:41,746 Yeah. 1082 01:21:43,706 --> 01:21:45,292 It's clearing up. 1083 01:21:45,667 --> 01:21:47,167 Yeah. It's okay. 1084 01:21:47,169 --> 01:21:48,711 Nice day. 1085 01:21:49,504 --> 01:21:50,797 Well... 1086 01:21:50,880 --> 01:21:52,340 not nice but... 1087 01:21:53,132 --> 01:21:54,551 ordinary. 1088 01:21:59,306 --> 01:22:01,183 He's not coming back. 1089 01:22:02,892 --> 01:22:04,519 The prodigal son. 1090 01:22:06,145 --> 01:22:06,769 Not today. 1091 01:22:06,771 --> 01:22:10,192 Give it a minute. Traffic's terrible. 1092 01:22:16,698 --> 01:22:18,200 The other son... 1093 01:22:19,367 --> 01:22:21,033 the non-prodigal one. 1094 01:22:21,035 --> 01:22:23,955 Do you know what he got for his troubles? 1095 01:22:26,791 --> 01:22:28,125 Days. 1096 01:22:28,918 --> 01:22:30,378 Mornings. 1097 01:22:31,671 --> 01:22:33,130 Afternoons. 1098 01:22:34,507 --> 01:22:35,800 At home. 1099 01:22:37,051 --> 01:22:38,511 With his family. 1100 01:22:41,306 --> 01:22:43,891 Ordinary days like this one. 1101 01:22:45,810 --> 01:22:47,562 That's what he got. 1102 01:23:15,590 --> 01:23:17,133 Oh. 1103 01:24:04,931 --> 01:24:07,267 - All right? - Yeah, you? 1104 01:24:07,892 --> 01:24:08,849 Not bad. 1105 01:24:20,697 --> 01:24:22,156 You coming? 77853

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