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[Noise]
2
00:00:01,417 --> 00:00:03,351
♪ La, la ♪
3
00:00:03,486 --> 00:00:05,218
♪ La, la ♪
4
00:00:05,254 --> 00:00:08,021
Narrator: Then again,
after humans discovered
5
00:00:08,057 --> 00:00:10,424
that prayer actually works...
6
00:00:10,460 --> 00:00:11,827
Pardon me, sir.
7
00:00:11,828 --> 00:00:14,094
Have you accepted the Lord
into your heart?
8
00:00:14,129 --> 00:00:16,830
Yeah, matter of fact, I have.
9
00:00:16,865 --> 00:00:19,066
Pray me a hoagie.
Make it snappy.
10
00:00:19,101 --> 00:00:21,634
I'm starving...
a number seven with pimento!
11
00:00:21,670 --> 00:00:23,136
All right. All right.
12
00:00:23,172 --> 00:00:28,208
Everyone cursed with belief in
their creator was finally useful.
13
00:00:28,243 --> 00:00:30,077
♪ La, la ♪
[Crunch]
14
00:00:30,112 --> 00:00:33,580
Yeah, pray fly me home. Heh.
Come on.
15
00:00:33,615 --> 00:00:36,850
Citizens grew used to having
all they desired...
16
00:00:36,885 --> 00:00:39,853
a number eight with cheese...
[Crunch]
17
00:00:39,888 --> 00:00:41,421
...number four, hold the bun.
18
00:00:41,457 --> 00:00:42,690
[Crunch]
19
00:00:42,691 --> 00:00:46,193
They began to yearn for the one
thing that had eluded them...
20
00:00:46,228 --> 00:00:50,330
spiritual faith, number 19
with a side of hot soup.
21
00:00:50,366 --> 00:00:52,132
[Angelic singing]
22
00:00:52,167 --> 00:00:55,934
The second someone got God,
they were prayer-jacked.
23
00:00:55,970 --> 00:00:57,870
Madness reigned.
24
00:00:57,905 --> 00:01:00,072
[Engines whirring]
25
00:01:02,543 --> 00:01:05,378
There was only one way
to make things right.
26
00:01:05,413 --> 00:01:08,280
Everyone agreed to drop all faith
27
00:01:08,316 --> 00:01:12,851
and forever believe nothing
on the count of three.
28
00:01:12,887 --> 00:01:16,122
One, two...
29
00:01:16,157 --> 00:01:22,057
[Title music]
30
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[Laughing]
31
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Narrator: So Hank Alto
experienced a medical issue
32
00:01:30,670 --> 00:01:34,872
- each time he tried to pray.
- Ah! Ah!
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Hmm, those little fellas want out.
34
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[Clicking tongue]
35
00:01:41,114 --> 00:01:43,548
[Arms stretching]
36
00:01:48,722 --> 00:01:50,688
Who's sick of him?
37
00:01:50,723 --> 00:01:52,424
You're sick of him, huh?
38
00:01:52,459 --> 00:01:56,227
At that moment, Hank realized
all he ever wanted in life
39
00:01:56,263 --> 00:01:59,630
was his hands back so he could
pray for his hands back...
40
00:01:59,666 --> 00:02:00,732
[Hands snarl]
41
00:02:00,733 --> 00:02:03,568
...because without prayer,
you have to work for your goals,
42
00:02:03,603 --> 00:02:06,470
and the hardest part
of improving yourself
43
00:02:06,505 --> 00:02:10,574
is deciding which purchase
will make you worthy of love.
44
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[Engine revving]
45
00:02:15,581 --> 00:02:18,248
Ah, this is a nice model.
Shall I ring it up?
46
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Let me get your wallet.
47
00:02:19,685 --> 00:02:22,519
Well, I'd like to try it first,
s... see how it looks.
48
00:02:22,555 --> 00:02:25,789
No, no, no, no, no.
That's considered tacky behavior.
49
00:02:25,824 --> 00:02:29,960
- Are you a tacky boy?
- But, um, how can I know if I like it?
50
00:02:29,995 --> 00:02:32,329
Because you trust me
implicitly, baby.
51
00:02:32,364 --> 00:02:34,131
Don't we got a good thing going?
52
00:02:34,166 --> 00:02:35,480
I'd like to speak with a manager.
53
00:02:35,481 --> 00:02:37,834
Hold on. Shut your dirty
mouth. I'm getting a text.
54
00:02:37,869 --> 00:02:40,704
Ah, I just made manager!
[Horn blaring]
55
00:02:40,739 --> 00:02:42,073
Up top!
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00:02:42,074 --> 00:02:43,840
Okay, then I... C...
can I talk to the owner?
57
00:02:43,875 --> 00:02:47,010
Hold on.
Shh, quiet, quiet, let me...
58
00:02:47,045 --> 00:02:50,446
Yo, I just bought this place!
[Horn blaring]
59
00:02:50,482 --> 00:02:52,215
Up tip, yo!
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00:02:52,250 --> 00:02:56,019
I'm not purchasing this TV
until I see how it plays!
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Fine. [Scoffs]
Golly.
62
00:02:59,091 --> 00:03:01,357
Young girl: Help me!
63
00:03:01,392 --> 00:03:03,927
I can't see!
64
00:03:03,962 --> 00:03:05,929
Where am I?
65
00:03:05,964 --> 00:03:08,932
Did I die?
66
00:03:08,967 --> 00:03:11,001
See? It looks great, right?
67
00:03:11,036 --> 00:03:14,303
- Shall we ring you up, tacky boy?
- What's that noise?
68
00:03:14,339 --> 00:03:16,205
That's me yelling
about ringing you up.
69
00:03:16,241 --> 00:03:18,807
No, the voice, it sounded like...
70
00:03:18,843 --> 00:03:20,809
[Screaming]
71
00:03:20,845 --> 00:03:22,311
Look, I'm not supposed
to do this.
72
00:03:22,347 --> 00:03:23,647
I'm going to be honest with you.
73
00:03:23,648 --> 00:03:27,683
- Why do you want a TV?
- Just to watch stuff, to relax.
74
00:03:27,718 --> 00:03:30,886
[Whispering]
75
00:03:30,921 --> 00:03:34,657
I can't really be dead.
This is all in my head.
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00:03:34,692 --> 00:03:37,426
Is it not relaxing? It's
the newest high-tech feature.
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00:03:37,462 --> 00:03:40,781
You're trying to sell me a TV
with a spirit of a dead
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00:03:40,782 --> 00:03:44,033
- little girl trapped inside it!
- Yes! That's the feature.
79
00:03:44,068 --> 00:03:47,169
- Do you not recognize her?
- Who is she?
80
00:03:47,204 --> 00:03:49,371
[evil voice] It's you,
the part of you that died
81
00:03:49,406 --> 00:03:52,408
- the day you learned the truth.
- What truth?
82
00:03:52,409 --> 00:03:54,476
Her name is Gretchen.
It's on all the latest models.
83
00:03:54,511 --> 00:03:56,071
Pretty neat what they can
do these days.
84
00:03:56,095 --> 00:03:59,282
- Go on. Ask her for something.
- No.
85
00:03:59,283 --> 00:04:01,316
She died so you
could have luxury,
86
00:04:01,351 --> 00:04:03,185
and you won't even
give her a chance?
87
00:04:03,220 --> 00:04:04,820
What do...
What do I ask?
88
00:04:04,855 --> 00:04:05,955
W... what does she do?
89
00:04:05,956 --> 00:04:07,422
Anything people want from a TV.
90
00:04:07,457 --> 00:04:11,994
Okay. Gretchen, make me
feel better about my life.
91
00:04:12,029 --> 00:04:15,263
I'm stuck in here filled with fear.
92
00:04:15,299 --> 00:04:17,933
Huh, that does make me
feel better.
93
00:04:17,968 --> 00:04:20,368
- I'll take it.
- Great! [Horn blaring]
94
00:04:20,404 --> 00:04:22,821
I'll just go ahead and sign
you up for the BGGBBR program
95
00:04:22,822 --> 00:04:25,240
- at 300 smacks a month.
- Wait, what's that?
96
00:04:25,275 --> 00:04:27,676
Gretchen is designed to creep
with such precision,
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00:04:27,711 --> 00:04:28,944
hidden messages pop.
98
00:04:28,945 --> 00:04:30,112
I died for you.
99
00:04:30,113 --> 00:04:32,180
It's all I do. I died.
100
00:04:32,216 --> 00:04:33,559
The Blind Girl Goose
Bumps Braille
101
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Reading System will decrypt them.
102
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[Whispering] I died.
It's all I do.
103
00:04:36,520 --> 00:04:39,187
She died for me.
This much is true.
104
00:04:39,189 --> 00:04:42,657
So ring me up with the extended
service protection plan, too.
105
00:04:42,693 --> 00:04:45,793
I was never a gadget guy,
but this is pretty neat.
106
00:04:45,829 --> 00:04:47,495
I'm scared as hell.
107
00:04:47,531 --> 00:04:49,997
Wh... What does that part say?
108
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[Gasps]
109
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It wants that I'm to kill you
for what you've done
110
00:04:54,287 --> 00:04:56,670
- to poor Gretchen!
- Wh... What did I do?
111
00:04:56,706 --> 00:05:00,341
It says, "You know,
that you must pay in pain."
112
00:05:00,376 --> 00:05:02,043
And how did you want
to pay for that?
113
00:05:02,078 --> 00:05:04,612
No! Those bumps are a liar!
114
00:05:04,647 --> 00:05:07,348
Narrator: When you push your fear away,
115
00:05:07,383 --> 00:05:11,518
it will emerge from somewhere
else stronger, angrier,
116
00:05:11,554 --> 00:05:13,420
strangle-y-er.
117
00:05:13,456 --> 00:05:15,823
[Stretching]
118
00:05:15,859 --> 00:05:18,292
We got us a bubble pop.
119
00:05:18,327 --> 00:05:22,063
Hop. It got away.
And we're off. [Crying]
120
00:05:22,098 --> 00:05:24,766
[Screaming]
121
00:05:24,801 --> 00:05:27,968
- How do we stop it?
- With the fear itself.
122
00:05:28,003 --> 00:05:30,036
Nothing to be afraid of.
123
00:05:30,072 --> 00:05:33,206
Tech rep will work out
the kinks for you.
124
00:05:33,242 --> 00:05:36,109
Narrator: After all fear
escaped his body,
125
00:05:36,145 --> 00:05:38,611
Hank's confidence broke out.
126
00:05:38,647 --> 00:05:42,515
I love myself as I am!
127
00:05:42,550 --> 00:05:44,384
[Stretching]
128
00:05:44,419 --> 00:05:46,719
Aaaaaaah!
129
00:05:46,755 --> 00:05:48,155
[Panting]
130
00:05:48,190 --> 00:05:51,557
Aah! Aah! Aah!
131
00:05:51,593 --> 00:05:52,810
[Smack!]
132
00:05:53,011 --> 00:05:57,164
- Yep, these are all Twin Towers.
- How did this happen?
133
00:05:57,199 --> 00:05:58,932
You must have got
pretty arrogant lately.
134
00:05:58,967 --> 00:06:00,833
They call them cocky pox.
135
00:06:00,868 --> 00:06:03,436
- Can you pop them?
- Oh, absolutely not.
136
00:06:03,438 --> 00:06:05,505
They're fully functional
places of work.
137
00:06:05,540 --> 00:06:08,908
Got a robust little economy
going, see?
138
00:06:08,943 --> 00:06:10,311
Oop, we got a jumper.
139
00:06:10,312 --> 00:06:12,378
Don't do it, you little cutie!
[Chuckles]
140
00:06:12,414 --> 00:06:15,581
Best way to cheer them up
is jumper mint.
141
00:06:15,617 --> 00:06:17,650
[Squeaking]
142
00:06:17,686 --> 00:06:21,253
He's scratching me!
Get rid of them!
143
00:06:21,289 --> 00:06:23,323
Hmm, well,
I can prescribe you something
144
00:06:23,358 --> 00:06:25,591
to take them down a peg.
145
00:06:25,627 --> 00:06:27,593
[Engines whirring]
146
00:06:33,201 --> 00:06:37,369
[Explosions]
147
00:06:37,404 --> 00:06:41,239
Hey, wow,
I feel like 100 bucks!
148
00:06:41,274 --> 00:06:43,174
Narrator: After a health scare,
149
00:06:43,210 --> 00:06:45,344
we are reminded what's important...
150
00:06:45,379 --> 00:06:47,612
[Echoing] shopping.
151
00:06:50,083 --> 00:06:51,351
[Coins clatter]
152
00:06:51,352 --> 00:06:54,653
- Paper or plastic?
- Uh, paper, please.
153
00:06:54,688 --> 00:06:55,955
[All gasp]
154
00:06:55,956 --> 00:06:58,790
You scum.
You don't care about trees.
155
00:06:58,826 --> 00:07:00,226
You murder trees.
156
00:07:00,260 --> 00:07:02,894
No, no, sorry, yeah, no,
I'll go with plastic.
157
00:07:02,929 --> 00:07:04,929
[All gasp]
158
00:07:04,965 --> 00:07:06,332
[Cricket chirping]
159
00:07:06,333 --> 00:07:09,834
Add more plastic to
the landfill? [Squeak]
160
00:07:09,869 --> 00:07:12,336
Why don't you just strangle
a dolphin, too, sicko.
161
00:07:12,372 --> 00:07:18,322
My planet is gasping her
death because of you! [Squeaks]
162
00:07:18,745 --> 00:07:24,645
Oh, right, I'll just hold
everything in my arm worms.
163
00:07:24,684 --> 00:07:26,751
[Blows air through teeth]
164
00:07:26,786 --> 00:07:29,186
And waste the energy
that you could have used
165
00:07:29,221 --> 00:07:33,991
- to help poor people.
- Okay, I'll go do that.
166
00:07:34,026 --> 00:07:36,594
♪ La, la ♪
167
00:07:36,629 --> 00:07:39,062
♪ La, la ♪
168
00:07:39,098 --> 00:07:40,698
♪ La, la ♪
169
00:07:40,733 --> 00:07:41,933
Pfft. Really?
170
00:07:41,934 --> 00:07:45,668
[Squeak]
Just soup, nothing solid?
171
00:07:45,704 --> 00:07:50,307
[Squeak] Pfft. Oh-ho-ho,
great, number sevens.
172
00:07:50,342 --> 00:07:53,110
[Squeak] Folks need
spiritual nourishment
173
00:07:53,145 --> 00:07:55,078
to fill their souls...
174
00:07:55,114 --> 00:07:58,315
[Scoffs]
...and a place to crash.
175
00:07:58,350 --> 00:08:00,550
♪ La, la ♪
176
00:08:00,585 --> 00:08:02,185
Oh, blessings,
that's all you got,
177
00:08:02,221 --> 00:08:06,924
no ascending to a glorious realm? Pfft.
178
00:08:06,959 --> 00:08:09,492
[Groaning]
179
00:08:14,099 --> 00:08:17,834
[Angelic singing]
180
00:08:17,869 --> 00:08:19,502
Pfft.
181
00:08:19,538 --> 00:08:23,440
How do I even know you really
transcended our material plane
182
00:08:23,475 --> 00:08:25,975
and merged harmoniously
with the cosmos?
183
00:08:26,010 --> 00:08:28,077
Pfft, pfft.
184
00:08:28,112 --> 00:08:29,679
[Squeak]
185
00:08:29,714 --> 00:08:31,648
Pfft. Tss.
186
00:08:31,683 --> 00:08:33,316
[Squeak]
187
00:08:33,351 --> 00:08:35,652
Pfft. Tss.
[Squeak]
188
00:08:35,687 --> 00:08:38,822
Girl: The force of Ike's scratch
made Ike's face to turn red
189
00:08:38,857 --> 00:08:42,725
as his fidgeting finger
plunged deep in his head.
190
00:08:42,761 --> 00:08:46,295
When your giggling digit
grows a mind of its own,
191
00:08:46,331 --> 00:08:49,466
who knows who controls
the wriggles it gives.
192
00:08:49,501 --> 00:08:52,835
Ike's finger discovered
and Ike then was shown
193
00:08:52,870 --> 00:08:56,772
the path of his brain
where righteousness lives.
194
00:08:56,807 --> 00:08:59,140
Oh, yeah, I'm so right.
195
00:08:59,176 --> 00:09:02,277
Oh, I'm so right!
196
00:09:02,312 --> 00:09:04,980
Girl: Once the spurt
of his rightness,
197
00:09:05,015 --> 00:09:06,547
it gushed and unfurled,
198
00:09:06,583 --> 00:09:09,316
he knew he must share
his gift with the world.
199
00:09:09,352 --> 00:09:11,018
How can I help you today,
brother?
200
00:09:11,053 --> 00:09:14,421
Oh, I'm so much better than you,
oh, me so better.
201
00:09:14,457 --> 00:09:15,724
Oh, me so better.
202
00:09:15,725 --> 00:09:18,626
- Oh, oh, brother! Oh, me so better!
- Why? Ooh!
203
00:09:18,661 --> 00:09:21,095
So though just a nub,
he continued to rub.
204
00:09:21,130 --> 00:09:23,598
He rubbed in the tub,
and he rubbed in the pub.
205
00:09:23,633 --> 00:09:26,066
He rubbed on the run,
all over the place.
206
00:09:26,102 --> 00:09:28,936
He rubbed just for fun
in everyone's face.
207
00:09:28,972 --> 00:09:31,772
For the treasure God bakes
and makes you a man,
208
00:09:31,808 --> 00:09:36,377
his pleasure, he takes
when he feels better than.
209
00:09:36,412 --> 00:09:38,912
The worst knee to the groin
of the heart
210
00:09:38,947 --> 00:09:41,715
the world has seen
was envious green as
211
00:09:41,750 --> 00:09:43,884
Ike flicked his brain's bean.
212
00:09:43,919 --> 00:09:47,654
This morality test made
them vow to do nice,
213
00:09:47,689 --> 00:09:51,357
so they plugged up his gush
and gave true sacrifice.
214
00:09:51,393 --> 00:09:55,695
[Squeak, stretching]
215
00:09:55,731 --> 00:09:58,031
[Pop]
216
00:09:58,066 --> 00:10:01,234
Proud Ike could no longer
make folks seem inferior.
217
00:10:01,269 --> 00:10:02,802
They each plunged a pointer
218
00:10:02,838 --> 00:10:05,505
through their own head's interior.
219
00:10:05,541 --> 00:10:08,542
The same goo that had once made
folks feel so bad,
220
00:10:08,577 --> 00:10:12,145
that goo became good.
Oh, the gush that was had.
221
00:10:12,180 --> 00:10:15,548
This goo was the cure
for their spirits' diseases.
222
00:10:15,583 --> 00:10:18,884
He lifted all hearts,
out-gooded all geez-s.
223
00:10:18,920 --> 00:10:22,121
Now in lieu of the doing
of doing good things,
224
00:10:22,157 --> 00:10:26,926
they'd feel just good feelings
of good the goo brings.
225
00:10:26,961 --> 00:10:30,196
The goo was pure goodness.
It had to be.
226
00:10:30,231 --> 00:10:34,067
They spread good like angels,
left good for free.
227
00:10:34,102 --> 00:10:35,834
We stepped out for such truth.
228
00:10:35,870 --> 00:10:39,272
What's this nub thing,
where, how?
229
00:10:39,307 --> 00:10:41,574
He is the proof that it's real.
230
00:10:41,609 --> 00:10:45,343
Man: I'm rubbing mine now.
231
00:10:45,379 --> 00:10:48,146
♪ There's blood
in the kitchen ♪
232
00:10:48,182 --> 00:10:51,416
♪ There's blood in the hall ♪
233
00:10:51,452 --> 00:10:54,386
♪ There's blood in the parlor ♪
234
00:10:54,421 --> 00:10:57,522
♪ Where my lady did fall ♪
235
00:10:57,558 --> 00:11:03,361
♪ Long Lankin was hanged
on a gibbet so high ♪
236
00:11:03,397 --> 00:11:09,347
♪ And the false nurse was burned
in a fire close by ♪
237
00:11:12,304 --> 00:11:15,647
sync & correction by f1nc0
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