Original subtitles

Do you know James Bande 00Sex?

Defeater of Dr. Dildo and her Amazons, in a previous adventure,

which you enjoyed in "James Bande 00Sex, Part I",

proudly presented by the Prestige Collection,

of which you are doubtless a loyal customer, by now.

James Bande is "The man who gets hard faster than his shadow".

He invented "coitus automaticus",

all done via remote control.

This episode of his tumultuous existence, now told for your pleasure,

takes place in June 1986, while he was working with O.S.Sex 69,

on behalf of Linda Loveliest, ex-porn-star,

who had become a special agent for President Ray-Gun.

0.S.Sex 69 and James Bande were brothers in arms,

like two raised fingers,

ever ready to probe inside the female Soviet spy circle.

Yeah...

Yeah...

Yeah...

You like that?

However, after getting acquainted with the whole James Bande harem,

the despicable O.S.Sex 69 then defected,

making rear entry for the K.G.B.,

under the new name of Tchernikov.

In other words, we were screwed,

all the more since we thought he'd gone AW.O.L,,

after trying to penetrate one of our spy rings,

one of the greedier ones...

Comrade Olga?

Connect me to Comrade Tchernikov!

Yes, Comrade Chief.

Hello?

Comrade Tchernikov?

Comrade Bartowski speaking.

Hello, Comrade Chief.

Report to my datcha at once.

I have a mission of the utmost importance for you.

Jump to it!

That's exactly what I'm doing!

I'll come as soon as I'm finished.

Comrade Olga?

Call Comrade Aldorf.

Yes, Comrade Chief.

Comrade Aldorf?

Hello, Comrade Chief.

Report to my datcha at once!

But... I'm on leave!

Don't give me that, Comrade!

The people... need you.

Right, I'm on my way, Chief.

- Hello, Comrade Olga. - Hello, Comrade Tchernikov.

- Is Comrade Chief here? - You have to wait, Comrade.

He's currently got Comrade President on the line.

Fine, fine!

Let's kill some time...

last time, we had a whole two hours of it...

Well, Comrade Tchernobyl... you don't waste a minute!

Come on in, Comrade...

- Comarde Olga can accommodate another. - Really?

Share and share alike, right?

0.S.Sex 69 had made a habit of sharing the glory with James Bande,

and old habits die hard, through thick and thin.

Now that he had become Tchernikov, he colluded with Aldorf,

in order to fuck his way through the entire female KGB contingent.

Hail, Chief!

Comrade Tchernikov!

Comrade Aldorf!

What do you think you're doing?

In my office, at once!

- Right now, Chief? - At oncel

Right, Chief... Okay, Chief...

Comrade Olga...

I leave my Bulgarian umbrella in your capable hands...

just take extra care, won't you?

Don't worry about the Chief...

Comrade Chief...

Comrades, I have a double mission of the utmost importance for you.

Comrades...

Tchernikov, you'll go to the Persian Gulf with agent Panarovich.

Comrade Olga will brief you fully.

Right, Comrade Chief!

Comrade Aldorf...

British agent 00Sex...

is on leave in Normandy.

You will work with a special crack team of our ladies,

and together you will neutralize him!

- Right, Chief! - On the double!

The mission entrusted to Tchernikov was not so simple.

He had to gain the favor of Amour El Sodo,

emir of Sodomy, in the Trunk-A-Stand empire,

in order to get his oil pipeline diverted,

away from his current distraction, some dishy American spy,

and towards the Soviet Union again.

Back there, the presidential erection was nearing,

yet their wells had become one giant empty scrotum...

Meanwhile back in Normandy, James Bande was whiling away the hours,

in the company of some call-girl,

who had perfected the art of blowing, on the job, at Madame Saint-Claude's.

During his flight to Sodomy,

Tchernikov's eye was caught by one particular fellow passenger,

and soon things were really beginning to take off,

for she was in fact one of Amour El Sodo's most lethal agents.

One fine sunny afternoon,

Tchernikov landed in the Persian Gulf

to embark on this exciting mission, entrusted by the KGB.

His powers of seduction were soon in full effect,

and the nymphs came in swarms,

with only one purpose from then on:

to get his leg around them all.

Settled at his residence, James Bande bonded a little,

making a thick, juicy hot-dog between the call-girl's lips.

Tchernikov actually encountered few obstacles

in boarding Amour El Sodo's luxury yacht, no' kidding,

those heavenly creatures met him with open arms,

and their sworn duty to protect Amour El Sodo

was quickly overcome with a few squirts of deadly sperm.

Amour El Sodo, as his name suggests...

or rather, as his name does not suggest,

was particularly keen on having his whistle blown.

Tchernikov, ever happy to share his harem with other men,

avidly pursued the creature already servicing Amour El Sodo.

Left alone, the two girls found comfort in some mutual caressing,

however, this being new territory, the rewards were hard to find.

While Tchernikov made rapid progress between the buttocks of these nymphs,

for the greater good of his assignment,

James Bande 00Sex was finding inspiration,

in his oral servicing downstairs.

Such a lethal weapon needed a good polishing,

to glow, to shine, his blade of Toledo steel...

However, let's get back to Aldorf,

the other KGB agent, in his mission to neutralize James Bande.

Being rather cowardly,

he couldn't tackle this top secret agent alone,

and secured the help of Dr. Dildo and her Amazons.

Dr. Dildo, a well-rounded babe,

then joined the mission, along with her ablest fighters,

who, in spite of their upbringing on Lesbos,

had recently aquired bisexual citizenship.

Thus, this motley crew approached James Bande's residence,

with the aim of bringing about his demise,

through total sexual exhaustion.

Ever loyal to the KGB,

Tchernikov would have to fuck his way through twice as many asses,

"Sodom and Gomorrah!" became the call of the hour.

Soon, his female followers adopted their own version,

in their task for Tchernikov, "Sodom-Bande-Gonorrhea!"

"Sodom-Bande-Gonorrhea!"

Sometimes we have to spell out Tchernikov's tactics,

this particular school of espionage has biblical origins!

Tchernikov had almost accomplished his mission.

Little did he know, on the other side of the planet,

James Bande, his former accomplice,

was about to face the ultimate obstacle, in his long career.

He was whiling away the hours with Amour El Sodo's daughters,

happy in the knowledge that Tchernikov had proven the perfect partner in crime.

His confidence brought unrestricted access in all the right places...

The war strategy favored by Dr. Dildo's Amazons and Aldorf

was now clear enough and attack was imminent.

Meanwhile, Tchernikov had no plans for a cease-fire...

in his happy engagement with Amour El Sodo's brood.

Dr. Dildo preferred a quieter approach, closing in on James Bande,

for the perfect ambush.

Lead astray by Tchernikov,

Amour El Sodo soon abandoned all his former principles,

and tried his dirty hand at a bit of incest,

forming a Royal Quadrangle with Tchernikov and his two daughters.

Back in Normandy, a full female cavalry led their charge on one poor man...

but that man was James Bande, whose weapon was already well-oiled,

and these female warriors were all soon fucked and sodomised into submission.

What a bastard!

Shit!

However, neither Dr. Dildo nor Aldorf could have anticipated...

that sex doesn't recongise any uniform, or any frontier,

and chaos ensued,

both nations and both sexes formed a new alliance,

not seeking the ulitimate weapon, but ultimate pleasure.

Things were soon wrapped up between Tchernikov and Amour El Sodo,

who leant out his yacht, before transferring to a KGB jet,

to rejoin Aldorf and the Amazons,

still bent on annihilating James Bande.

However, the KGB really hadn't done their homework this time...

otherwise they'd have know...

that Tchernikov and James Bande had been bosom buddies for years,

since he'd been a bird of a different feather...

O.S. Sex 69.

Say, my socialist friend...

instead of kidnapping me, why not join our party in the West?

My government will be glad to grant you political asylum.

When the two former accomplices met again,

friendship eclipsed ideology.

They buried the soviet sickle, preferring to retread their way through womankind,

since pleasures are so much better when shared.

James Bande and Tchernikov...

restored Dr. Dildo's taste for sausage, with relish of sperm,

and she sure had the best chefs...

What a pity, Comrade Olgal!

Our Comrades have defected to the West...

where they prefer Coca-Cola...

to our beloved vodkal

THE END