subtitlecat.com

All language subtitles for 6x10 - We Could Be Royals.1 ENG

Afrikaans

Akan

Albanian

Amharic

Arabic

Armenian

Azerbaijani

Basque

Belarusian

Bemba

Bengali

Bihari

Bosnian

Breton

Bulgarian

Cambodian

Catalan

Cebuano

Cherokee

Chichewa

Chinese (Simplified)

Chinese (Traditional)

Corsican

Croatian

Czech

Danish

Dutch

English

Esperanto

Estonian

Ewe

Faroese

Filipino

Finnish

French

Frisian

Galician

Georgian

German

Greek

Guarani

Gujarati

Haitian Creole

Hausa

Hawaiian

Hebrew

Hindi

Hmong

Hungarian

Icelandic

Igbo

Indonesian

Interlingua

Irish

Italian Download

Japanese

Javanese

Kannada

Kazakh

Kinyarwanda

Kirundi

Kongo

Korean

Krio (Sierra Leone)

Kurdish

Kurdish (Soranî)

Kyrgyz

Laothian

Latin

Latvian

Lingala

Lithuanian

Lozi

Luganda

Luo

Luxembourgish

Macedonian

Malagasy

Malay

Malayalam

Maltese

Maori

Marathi

Mauritian Creole

Moldavian

Mongolian

Myanmar (Burmese)

Montenegrin

Nepali

Nigerian Pidgin

Northern Sotho

Norwegian

Norwegian (Nynorsk)

Occitan

Oriya

Oromo

Pashto

Persian

Polish

Portuguese (Brazil)

Portuguese (Portugal)

Punjabi

Quechua

Romanian

Romansh

Runyakitara

Russian

Samoan

Scots Gaelic

Serbian

Serbo-Croatian

Sesotho

Setswana

Seychellois Creole

Shona

Sindhi

Sinhalese

Slovak

Slovenian

Somali

Spanish

Spanish (Latin American)

Sundanese

Swahili

Swedish

Tajik

Tamil

Tatar

Telugu

Thai

Tigrinya

Tonga

Tshiluba

Tumbuka

Turkish

Turkmen

Twi

Uighur

Ukrainian

Urdu

Uzbek

Vietnamese

Welsh

Wolof

Xhosa

Yiddish

Yoruba

Zulu

Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,602 --> 00:00:04,161 "Hot in Cleveland" is recorded 2 00:00:04,237 --> 00:00:06,297 in front of a live studio audience. 3 00:00:06,372 --> 00:00:08,705 Guess what Madonna, Jamie Lee Curtis, and I 4 00:00:08,774 --> 00:00:12,108 - have in common. - Slept with Warren Beatty? 5 00:00:12,745 --> 00:00:14,805 - No. - Peaked in the '80s? 6 00:00:14,881 --> 00:00:17,009 No. Stop guessing. 7 00:00:17,083 --> 00:00:20,212 We're all celebrities who are also children's-book writers. 8 00:00:20,286 --> 00:00:22,118 You've written a children's book? 9 00:00:22,188 --> 00:00:24,308 "Have written," "will write"... What's the difference? 10 00:00:25,691 --> 00:00:28,490 The important thing is, we're doing this together. 11 00:00:28,561 --> 00:00:30,587 What, you want me to work on your book with you? 12 00:00:30,663 --> 00:00:32,393 Oh, work with me, work instead of me... 13 00:00:32,465 --> 00:00:34,366 What's the difference? 14 00:00:34,433 --> 00:00:35,992 You know what? I'm in. 15 00:00:36,068 --> 00:00:38,060 I've always wanted to write a children's book. 16 00:00:38,137 --> 00:00:40,299 Oh, I used to love making up stories for my kids. 17 00:00:40,373 --> 00:00:41,705 Oh, me too. 18 00:00:41,774 --> 00:00:45,211 My favorite was, "Mommy loved you in the school play, 19 00:00:45,278 --> 00:00:48,806 but you didn't see me because I was in the very last row." 20 00:00:49,715 --> 00:00:52,150 Oh, I told that one again and again. 21 00:00:52,218 --> 00:00:53,652 Oh, my God. 22 00:00:53,719 --> 00:00:56,450 I just found out my sister's coming to Cleveland. 23 00:00:56,522 --> 00:00:58,013 You have a sister? 24 00:00:58,090 --> 00:00:59,991 She's been a nun for the last 20 years. 25 00:01:00,059 --> 00:01:01,357 She's nothing like me. 26 00:01:01,427 --> 00:01:04,989 Well, you both spend a lot of time on your knees. 27 00:01:07,500 --> 00:01:09,901 Actually, she's decided to leave the convent. 28 00:01:09,969 --> 00:01:12,598 Wow. That's gonna be a big adjustment for her 29 00:01:12,672 --> 00:01:13,765 out in the real world. 30 00:01:13,839 --> 00:01:15,432 Poor, poor Jill. 31 00:01:15,508 --> 00:01:16,908 She's always been a bit of a mess. 32 00:01:16,976 --> 00:01:18,808 Clumsy and mousy... 33 00:01:18,878 --> 00:01:21,746 looking to her beautiful, glamorous sister for protection. 34 00:01:21,814 --> 00:01:26,445 Ah, the beautiful and glamorous do bear a lot of responsibility. 35 00:01:26,519 --> 00:01:29,148 You know, responsibility was actually the theme 36 00:01:29,221 --> 00:01:30,450 of my radio show yesterday. 37 00:01:30,523 --> 00:01:32,123 - Did anybody hear it? - I did. 38 00:01:32,191 --> 00:01:36,094 But you didn't see me because I was in the very last row. 39 00:01:39,298 --> 00:01:42,268 As your assistant, I'm running out of excuses 40 00:01:42,335 --> 00:01:44,531 for why you're not at city council meetings. 41 00:01:44,604 --> 00:01:46,470 What did you tell them today? 42 00:01:46,539 --> 00:01:48,701 That you were on a fact-finding mission 43 00:01:48,774 --> 00:01:50,606 to find the best beer in Cleveland. 44 00:01:50,676 --> 00:01:53,168 Well, you weren't lying. 45 00:01:55,448 --> 00:01:58,976 Well, everyone's excited about the party you're hosting 46 00:01:59,051 --> 00:02:00,917 for our sister city in England. 47 00:02:00,987 --> 00:02:02,421 And you know what's fascinating? 48 00:02:02,488 --> 00:02:05,583 Our sister city is also called Cleveland. 49 00:02:05,658 --> 00:02:07,820 I do know what's fascinating. 50 00:02:07,893 --> 00:02:09,885 And that isn't it. 51 00:02:11,230 --> 00:02:14,496 Now, the guest of honor is the Earl of Cleveland. 52 00:02:14,567 --> 00:02:16,559 We need to go over protocol, 53 00:02:16,636 --> 00:02:19,834 so you don't create another international incident, 54 00:02:19,905 --> 00:02:22,739 like you did with that German mayor last month. 55 00:02:22,808 --> 00:02:25,778 What incident? I was making a joke. 56 00:02:25,845 --> 00:02:30,180 You put a comb under your nose and goose-stepped behind him. 57 00:02:32,551 --> 00:02:35,715 I may have been testing beer that day, too. 58 00:02:39,158 --> 00:02:40,820 Elka, Mamie Sue... 59 00:02:40,893 --> 00:02:43,658 this is my sister Jill. 60 00:02:44,864 --> 00:02:46,890 - May we? - Of course. 61 00:02:51,037 --> 00:02:53,506 This is from that gentleman at the bar. 62 00:02:54,040 --> 00:02:54,973 Wow. 63 00:02:55,041 --> 00:02:57,442 Men have always found you irresistible. 64 00:02:57,510 --> 00:03:00,105 Probably 'cause she doesn't resist. 65 00:03:01,280 --> 00:03:03,010 Actually, growing up, 66 00:03:03,082 --> 00:03:04,710 even if she was with a boy she liked, 67 00:03:04,784 --> 00:03:06,412 she'd always look out for me. 68 00:03:06,485 --> 00:03:07,885 But any time I took a tumble, 69 00:03:07,953 --> 00:03:09,819 she'd be right there to pick me up, 70 00:03:09,889 --> 00:03:12,358 dust me off, and say, "On your feet, Cabbage," 71 00:03:12,425 --> 00:03:14,189 and then she'd punch whoever laughed at me 72 00:03:14,260 --> 00:03:15,728 in the throat. 73 00:03:16,295 --> 00:03:19,288 May I ask why you quit being a nun? 74 00:03:19,365 --> 00:03:21,334 Is it because you're a flibbertigibbet, 75 00:03:21,400 --> 00:03:24,063 a will-o'-the-wisp, a clown? 76 00:03:26,238 --> 00:03:30,141 I didn't feel I had the calling anymore, so I left. 77 00:03:30,209 --> 00:03:33,668 I bet that raised a lot of eyebrow. 78 00:03:35,548 --> 00:03:36,948 What? 79 00:03:37,016 --> 00:03:39,542 Am I the only one who sees it? 80 00:03:41,387 --> 00:03:44,221 Elka, that is exactly the kind of joke 81 00:03:44,290 --> 00:03:47,226 you can't make at the party for the Earl of Cleveland. 82 00:03:47,293 --> 00:03:49,819 The Earl of Cleveland is coming here? 83 00:03:49,895 --> 00:03:53,593 - Percy Lennox-Gordon. - 47th in line to the throne. 84 00:03:53,666 --> 00:03:55,877 Would you like to come to the party we're throwing for him? 85 00:03:55,901 --> 00:03:57,870 Yes! And who knows. 86 00:03:57,937 --> 00:03:59,838 Maybe he sees me. I see him. 87 00:03:59,905 --> 00:04:01,168 One thing leads to another, 88 00:04:01,240 --> 00:04:04,836 and 46 unfortunate accidents later, I'm Queen of England. 89 00:04:06,312 --> 00:04:07,974 I don't think I want to come. 90 00:04:08,047 --> 00:04:09,379 I'm not very good at parties. 91 00:04:09,448 --> 00:04:11,679 Oh, poor Jill. 92 00:04:11,751 --> 00:04:13,549 I'll make sure you have a good time. 93 00:04:13,619 --> 00:04:14,780 You can borrow my clothes, 94 00:04:14,854 --> 00:04:18,416 and maybe we can take care of some of this, too. 95 00:04:18,491 --> 00:04:20,824 Elka and I are going to the beauty salon. 96 00:04:20,893 --> 00:04:22,054 You could come with us. 97 00:04:22,128 --> 00:04:24,097 That's a great idea. 98 00:04:24,163 --> 00:04:26,394 I almost became a nun, 99 00:04:26,465 --> 00:04:28,263 but then I learned that those big hats 100 00:04:28,334 --> 00:04:31,634 don't really make you fly, even on a really windy day. 101 00:04:33,706 --> 00:04:36,437 And I liked sex with men. 102 00:04:40,846 --> 00:04:42,446 Okay, even though it's a children's book, 103 00:04:42,481 --> 00:04:43,574 there is a lot to do. 104 00:04:43,649 --> 00:04:45,345 Once we come up with our idea, 105 00:04:45,417 --> 00:04:46,885 we're gonna have to do an outline, 106 00:04:46,952 --> 00:04:48,318 first draft, second draft, 107 00:04:48,387 --> 00:04:51,221 and then we should be done in six months. 108 00:04:51,290 --> 00:04:52,223 That's great. 109 00:04:52,291 --> 00:04:54,385 It's due Monday. 110 00:04:54,460 --> 00:04:55,894 What? 111 00:04:55,961 --> 00:04:58,624 And the editor is coming by today to see what we've got. 112 00:04:58,697 --> 00:05:00,598 - What?! - Don't act surprised. 113 00:05:00,666 --> 00:05:02,862 We've had a whole year to come up with something. 114 00:05:02,935 --> 00:05:04,494 What?! 115 00:05:04,570 --> 00:05:06,266 You have had a whole year? 116 00:05:06,338 --> 00:05:08,807 No, we have had a whole year. 117 00:05:08,874 --> 00:05:11,309 I told him that I've had a collaborator all this time. 118 00:05:11,377 --> 00:05:12,811 You know... to put him at ease. 119 00:05:12,878 --> 00:05:16,212 He thinks that actors are lazy and unreliable. 120 00:05:16,282 --> 00:05:19,150 When will that stereotype end? 121 00:05:19,218 --> 00:05:21,414 Is Jill back from her makeover? 122 00:05:21,487 --> 00:05:23,513 - No, not yet. - Oh, poor thing. 123 00:05:23,589 --> 00:05:25,455 Hope she's not expecting a miracle. 124 00:05:31,497 --> 00:05:33,329 How do I look? 125 00:05:33,399 --> 00:05:35,095 Oh, my goodness. Jill! 126 00:05:35,167 --> 00:05:38,365 Joy, dear, you'll want to see this. 127 00:05:40,906 --> 00:05:42,204 Holy... 128 00:05:52,952 --> 00:05:55,080 ♪ Ba-ba, ba-ba ♪ 129 00:05:55,154 --> 00:05:58,386 ♪ Ba-ba, ba-ba ♪ 130 00:05:58,457 --> 00:05:59,049 ♪ Hey! ♪ 131 00:05:59,124 --> 00:06:00,558 Hello, all. 132 00:06:00,626 --> 00:06:02,492 - Where's Joy? - Coming! 133 00:06:06,065 --> 00:06:08,296 Oh, my. What did the doctor say? 134 00:06:08,367 --> 00:06:09,835 Oh, it's not bad. 135 00:06:09,902 --> 00:06:11,996 Just have to use this for a couple of days. 136 00:06:12,071 --> 00:06:14,233 Remember when we were kids and I'd follow you 137 00:06:14,306 --> 00:06:16,172 wherever you went on my scooter? 138 00:06:16,242 --> 00:06:19,110 Now you have the scooter. It's like we've swapped places. 139 00:06:19,178 --> 00:06:20,737 It's funny, isn't it? 140 00:06:21,547 --> 00:06:23,413 Yes, very funny. 141 00:06:27,920 --> 00:06:30,082 That's not your normal laugh. 142 00:06:30,155 --> 00:06:31,589 Yes, it is. 143 00:06:38,631 --> 00:06:42,932 Now, Elka, here's a list of the British dignitaries. 144 00:06:43,002 --> 00:06:44,129 Whoa. 145 00:06:44,203 --> 00:06:46,399 These are some goofy names. 146 00:06:46,472 --> 00:06:50,068 Elka, class and rank are incredibly important 147 00:06:50,142 --> 00:06:51,542 to British nobility. 148 00:06:52,845 --> 00:06:54,575 Let's say there's a tornado, 149 00:06:54,647 --> 00:06:57,674 and you're with a baron and a gentleman of the gentry. 150 00:06:57,750 --> 00:06:59,946 Who do you bring to the storm cellar? 151 00:07:00,019 --> 00:07:02,318 - The baron. - Correct. 152 00:07:02,388 --> 00:07:04,084 Have you been studying? 153 00:07:04,790 --> 00:07:06,281 No. 154 00:07:06,358 --> 00:07:10,489 I'm just not spending a night in a basement with a gentleman. 155 00:07:14,833 --> 00:07:16,563 I'm so nervous. 156 00:07:16,635 --> 00:07:19,901 In the convent, flirting was frowned upon. 157 00:07:19,972 --> 00:07:22,737 Actually, frowning was frowned upon. 158 00:07:23,575 --> 00:07:27,239 Poor Jill. Poor, poor Jill. 159 00:07:27,313 --> 00:07:30,147 - Where are our drinks? - I'll go check. 160 00:07:33,852 --> 00:07:35,047 Hello. 161 00:07:35,120 --> 00:07:36,418 Can I buy you a drink? 162 00:07:43,929 --> 00:07:44,862 What the... 163 00:07:44,930 --> 00:07:46,296 Aah! 164 00:07:47,466 --> 00:07:48,900 Oh! 165 00:07:48,968 --> 00:07:51,597 Oh, God! This is filthy. 166 00:07:52,171 --> 00:07:56,165 All those men were fighting over who could buy me a drink. 167 00:07:56,241 --> 00:07:58,301 Oh. What happened to your eye? 168 00:07:58,377 --> 00:08:01,074 I got lemon juice and grease in it. 169 00:08:01,146 --> 00:08:03,615 Oh, poor Joy. 170 00:08:03,682 --> 00:08:06,447 Poor, poor Joy. 171 00:08:13,325 --> 00:08:15,988 What a wonderful evening. 172 00:08:16,061 --> 00:08:18,929 Have you ever had five men buy you drinks? 173 00:08:18,998 --> 00:08:19,931 Please. 174 00:08:19,999 --> 00:08:22,025 I've had six, often seven. 175 00:08:24,636 --> 00:08:26,264 Crap. 176 00:08:26,338 --> 00:08:28,068 Just let me do the talking. 177 00:08:28,140 --> 00:08:31,474 I've flirted my way out of dozens of tickets. 178 00:08:36,115 --> 00:08:38,744 What seems to be the problem, Officer? 179 00:08:40,352 --> 00:08:42,514 Your blinker's been on for the last 5 miles. 180 00:08:42,588 --> 00:08:44,216 I'm sorry, Officer. 181 00:08:44,289 --> 00:08:45,467 We're trying to get to the hospital 182 00:08:45,491 --> 00:08:46,857 for my poor sister's eye. 183 00:08:46,925 --> 00:08:49,019 Wow. You have a beautiful accent. 184 00:08:49,094 --> 00:08:52,792 - Oh. - We have the exact same accent. 185 00:08:52,865 --> 00:08:54,663 Would you like an escort to the hospital? 186 00:08:54,733 --> 00:08:55,996 No, we're fine. 187 00:08:56,068 --> 00:08:58,264 We have an excellent navigation system. 188 00:08:58,337 --> 00:09:01,739 I'll let you go with a warning, but drive safe, okay? 189 00:09:01,807 --> 00:09:04,072 You're carrying precious cargo. 190 00:09:08,914 --> 00:09:12,214 Did I just flirt my way out of your ticket? 191 00:09:13,552 --> 00:09:15,453 Thrilling. 192 00:09:16,321 --> 00:09:18,051 You don't seem very happy for me. 193 00:09:18,123 --> 00:09:19,523 Of course I am... 194 00:09:19,591 --> 00:09:23,892 although, thinking about it, being hot isn't for everyone... 195 00:09:23,962 --> 00:09:26,295 which makes me wonder if, on some level, 196 00:09:26,365 --> 00:09:28,664 you wouldn't be happier back in the convent. 197 00:09:28,734 --> 00:09:30,862 But I don't want to go back to the convent. 198 00:09:30,936 --> 00:09:31,869 I'm having fun. 199 00:09:31,937 --> 00:09:35,271 Maybe, but it doesn't suit you. 200 00:09:35,340 --> 00:09:37,241 Oh, my goodness. 201 00:09:37,309 --> 00:09:41,371 You're jealous 'cause I'm blossoming and you're wilting. 202 00:09:42,714 --> 00:09:44,444 You just can't stand the idea 203 00:09:44,516 --> 00:09:47,042 of not being the prettiest woman in the room. 204 00:09:47,119 --> 00:09:48,246 Well, you know what? 205 00:09:48,320 --> 00:09:51,017 You're not even the prettiest woman in this car. 206 00:09:51,090 --> 00:09:55,255 That couldn't be further from the truth! 207 00:10:01,299 --> 00:10:03,077 Okay, look, the editor's gonna be here any minute. 208 00:10:03,101 --> 00:10:04,741 We still don't have an idea for this book. 209 00:10:04,803 --> 00:10:06,203 Don't panic. Maybe he'll be late. 210 00:10:06,271 --> 00:10:09,264 Oh, my God, he's not late. 211 00:10:09,341 --> 00:10:10,718 And the advance he gave us was huge, 212 00:10:10,742 --> 00:10:11,937 and we've already spent it. 213 00:10:12,010 --> 00:10:13,876 What? I didn't get any money. 214 00:10:13,945 --> 00:10:15,504 You've only been working here a day. 215 00:10:15,580 --> 00:10:16,580 Don't get greedy. 216 00:10:17,649 --> 00:10:19,845 You know what? I'll stall him. 217 00:10:21,286 --> 00:10:23,255 Anderson, how lovely to see you. 218 00:10:23,321 --> 00:10:24,983 This is my collaborator, Melanie. 219 00:10:25,056 --> 00:10:26,615 - Hello. - Listen. 220 00:10:26,691 --> 00:10:28,159 We could do that whole dance, 221 00:10:28,226 --> 00:10:30,752 but let me just bottom-line this for you. 222 00:10:30,829 --> 00:10:32,127 Melanie and I just need... 223 00:10:32,197 --> 00:10:34,428 Victoria, you better not be asking 224 00:10:34,499 --> 00:10:35,626 for another extension. 225 00:10:35,700 --> 00:10:37,931 You and Melanie have had two years. 226 00:10:38,003 --> 00:10:39,699 Two?! 227 00:10:40,405 --> 00:10:43,466 Extension, no. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. 228 00:10:43,541 --> 00:10:45,567 Delay this idea that is going to change 229 00:10:45,644 --> 00:10:47,476 children's literature forever? 230 00:10:47,545 --> 00:10:49,844 If anything, we need less time. 231 00:10:49,914 --> 00:10:51,610 Fantastic. 232 00:10:51,683 --> 00:10:53,345 I want to hear it after I take this. 233 00:10:53,418 --> 00:10:55,978 - Is there a place I can... - Oh, yes. Right here. 234 00:10:56,054 --> 00:10:58,250 Just take your time, and while you're at it, 235 00:10:58,323 --> 00:10:59,400 you might want to tighten your socks, 236 00:10:59,424 --> 00:11:01,791 because they're about to get knocked off. 237 00:11:03,328 --> 00:11:05,559 Why did you tell him that we have a great idea? 238 00:11:05,630 --> 00:11:07,041 Honey, what do you think... One's just gonna walk 239 00:11:07,065 --> 00:11:08,242 in the front door? 240 00:11:08,266 --> 00:11:09,564 And now, thanks to you, 241 00:11:09,634 --> 00:11:11,535 I have to wear this stupid eye patch. 242 00:11:13,571 --> 00:11:15,665 Well, that's not my fault. Face it. 243 00:11:15,740 --> 00:11:17,208 You liked me when I was mousy, 244 00:11:17,275 --> 00:11:19,642 and now that that's changed, you can't handle it. 245 00:11:19,711 --> 00:11:20,337 Nonsense! 246 00:11:20,412 --> 00:11:23,109 All I've ever been is a protective big sister. 247 00:11:23,181 --> 00:11:25,844 Then how come when you had an eyebrow-waxing business, 248 00:11:25,917 --> 00:11:27,783 you never got rid of my unibrow? 249 00:11:27,852 --> 00:11:29,514 Why would you want me to? 250 00:11:29,587 --> 00:11:31,112 So you could be sexy for God? 251 00:11:31,189 --> 00:11:33,158 That's sick. 252 00:11:36,161 --> 00:11:38,653 So, tell me the idea. 253 00:11:38,730 --> 00:11:42,690 It's a story about two sisters, Joy and Jill. 254 00:11:42,767 --> 00:11:46,226 One was mousy her whole life... 255 00:11:46,304 --> 00:11:48,432 because she was a mouse. 256 00:11:48,506 --> 00:11:49,701 Ah! 257 00:11:49,774 --> 00:11:51,174 They're both mice, 258 00:11:51,242 --> 00:11:53,211 and the other mouse was always the beautiful one. 259 00:11:53,278 --> 00:11:56,510 Right, but, then, they switched. 260 00:11:56,581 --> 00:11:58,106 Sounds interesting. 261 00:11:58,183 --> 00:12:00,846 You know, mice do well in focus groups. 262 00:12:02,320 --> 00:12:03,811 Melanie and I are artists. 263 00:12:03,888 --> 00:12:05,652 We don't cater to focus groups. 264 00:12:05,724 --> 00:12:07,192 And how does your story end? 265 00:12:07,258 --> 00:12:11,593 Well, what kind of endings do focus groups like? 266 00:12:12,797 --> 00:12:16,165 The kind that are in my hand by Monday. 267 00:12:16,234 --> 00:12:19,602 Then you will have it by Sunday. 268 00:12:21,740 --> 00:12:24,676 What is wrong with you? 269 00:12:27,512 --> 00:12:29,913 I'm ready. How do I look? 270 00:12:29,981 --> 00:12:32,576 Oh, you'll be the prettiest mouse at the ball. 271 00:12:32,650 --> 00:12:33,845 What do you mean, "mouse"? 272 00:12:33,918 --> 00:12:36,387 Uh, nothing. 273 00:12:38,156 --> 00:12:39,522 Sounds like Elka's ready to go. 274 00:12:39,591 --> 00:12:40,801 - Do you need a lift? - No, no, no. 275 00:12:40,825 --> 00:12:42,851 We're gonna wait for Joy. You go ahead without us. 276 00:12:44,829 --> 00:12:46,855 So, the newly beautiful mouse 277 00:12:46,931 --> 00:12:48,365 headed off to the ball. 278 00:12:48,433 --> 00:12:50,163 It's almost too easy. 279 00:12:50,235 --> 00:12:52,966 Now, what's our ending? 280 00:12:53,037 --> 00:12:55,199 We'll find out at the ball. The Earl is there. 281 00:12:55,273 --> 00:12:56,741 The two sisters will vie for him, 282 00:12:56,808 --> 00:13:00,108 and then whatever happens, that's the ending to our book. 283 00:13:00,178 --> 00:13:01,806 - I'm not going. - What? 284 00:13:01,880 --> 00:13:03,212 - What? - No. No, no, no, no. 285 00:13:03,281 --> 00:13:04,391 You can't let a little thing 286 00:13:04,415 --> 00:13:07,908 like a scooter and an eye patch stop you. 287 00:13:08,553 --> 00:13:10,283 How about this? 288 00:13:12,891 --> 00:13:16,419 I knocked my crown out trying to open my eye drops bottle. 289 00:13:19,030 --> 00:13:20,157 You cannot give up. 290 00:13:20,231 --> 00:13:21,961 This would be a terrible ending. 291 00:13:22,033 --> 00:13:24,229 Where would Cinderella be if she'd stayed home 292 00:13:24,302 --> 00:13:25,634 and felt sorry for herself 293 00:13:25,703 --> 00:13:27,899 when her sister was off having fun at the ball? 294 00:13:27,972 --> 00:13:31,170 Look at me. I'm hardly Cinderella. 295 00:13:34,312 --> 00:13:36,679 Victoria... 296 00:13:36,748 --> 00:13:38,011 she's right. 297 00:13:38,082 --> 00:13:40,313 Jill is the one that got beautiful. 298 00:13:40,385 --> 00:13:43,048 Oh, that's true. You've had your time. 299 00:13:43,121 --> 00:13:44,749 Jill's Cinderella now. 300 00:13:44,823 --> 00:13:45,823 Shut up! 301 00:13:45,890 --> 00:13:48,553 I'm Cinderella, and I'm going to the ball. 302 00:13:48,626 --> 00:13:50,458 I just need you to help me look pretty enough 303 00:13:50,528 --> 00:13:52,827 to capture a nobleman. 304 00:13:54,766 --> 00:13:55,766 No problem. 305 00:13:57,202 --> 00:13:59,933 Now, this is gonna be harder than writing the book. 306 00:14:05,225 --> 00:14:08,354 The Earl of Cleveland is going to be here any second. 307 00:14:08,429 --> 00:14:11,456 I hope you memorized the names of the dignitaries. 308 00:14:11,532 --> 00:14:12,898 Oh, don't worry. 309 00:14:12,967 --> 00:14:15,266 I made a cheat sheet. 310 00:14:15,903 --> 00:14:17,531 - Oh, no. - What? 311 00:14:17,605 --> 00:14:20,541 These are my football picks. 312 00:14:21,108 --> 00:14:23,236 Elka, what were you thinking? 313 00:14:23,310 --> 00:14:24,369 I know. 314 00:14:24,445 --> 00:14:27,074 Ravens plus three? 315 00:14:28,215 --> 00:14:30,582 Here they come. 316 00:14:30,651 --> 00:14:32,813 - Oh, I'm screwed. - Don't panic. 317 00:14:32,886 --> 00:14:35,481 The Earl has to introduce his people to you. 318 00:14:35,556 --> 00:14:38,390 Just pay attention and repeat what he says. 319 00:14:38,459 --> 00:14:40,792 Councilwoman Ostrovsky. A pleasure. 320 00:14:40,861 --> 00:14:42,853 The members of my party... 321 00:14:42,930 --> 00:14:44,956 Chief Magistrate Martin Portreeve; 322 00:14:45,032 --> 00:14:47,024 Lieutenant Colonel Rodson Heathcote-Drummond; 323 00:14:47,101 --> 00:14:48,626 the Honorable Martin Gled-Heweson, 324 00:14:48,702 --> 00:14:49,897 Bishop of Lichfield; 325 00:14:49,970 --> 00:14:53,600 Lord Keeper of the Privy Seal LeMonde Oswolf-Sticket. 326 00:15:02,049 --> 00:15:06,453 Everyone, please welcome the Earl of Cleveland. 327 00:15:08,222 --> 00:15:10,782 And with him, uh... 328 00:15:10,858 --> 00:15:12,019 Plaidsy... 329 00:15:14,161 --> 00:15:15,652 War Man... 330 00:15:16,830 --> 00:15:20,096 Churchie, and... 331 00:15:20,167 --> 00:15:22,329 Lemony Snicket. 332 00:15:32,880 --> 00:15:34,678 I believe we're going to have great fun 333 00:15:34,748 --> 00:15:35,748 doing business together. 334 00:15:37,317 --> 00:15:38,717 Gentlemen, please. 335 00:15:38,786 --> 00:15:40,618 You did it, Elka. 336 00:15:40,688 --> 00:15:41,986 You're a hero. 337 00:15:42,056 --> 00:15:44,855 Oh, save it for the real heroes... 338 00:15:44,925 --> 00:15:46,416 The Ravens... 339 00:15:46,493 --> 00:15:48,223 if they cover the spread. 340 00:15:50,664 --> 00:15:52,189 Oh, you look so beautiful. 341 00:15:52,266 --> 00:15:53,962 Your eye patch matches your gown. 342 00:15:54,034 --> 00:15:56,526 Your gown covers the wheels on your orthopedic boot, 343 00:15:56,603 --> 00:15:59,971 and the superglue is holding perfectly on your dead tooth. 344 00:16:00,040 --> 00:16:03,272 I feel so glamorous. 345 00:16:03,977 --> 00:16:06,674 Damn it. Jill's already with the Earl. 346 00:16:06,747 --> 00:16:10,514 Look at her over there, shamelessly flirting with him. 347 00:16:11,218 --> 00:16:12,584 Maybe I should just go home. 348 00:16:12,653 --> 00:16:14,588 No, you can't. That's quitter talk. 349 00:16:14,655 --> 00:16:16,954 If you don't go down fighting, what does that do for us? 350 00:16:17,024 --> 00:16:19,960 Who look up to you. 351 00:16:21,095 --> 00:16:22,324 What's the use? 352 00:16:22,396 --> 00:16:23,756 Look, he's already interested in... 353 00:16:23,797 --> 00:16:25,561 Aaaaah! 354 00:16:28,769 --> 00:16:29,896 Hello. 355 00:16:29,970 --> 00:16:31,996 You move like an angel... 356 00:16:32,072 --> 00:16:34,371 as if you're floating across the room. 357 00:16:34,441 --> 00:16:36,876 Thank you for remarking on my grace, Your Grace. 358 00:16:38,112 --> 00:16:40,843 Ah. Beluga. My favorite. 359 00:16:40,914 --> 00:16:43,406 - I simply adore beluga. - I adore it more. 360 00:16:43,484 --> 00:16:44,543 Mm-hmm. 361 00:16:46,453 --> 00:16:49,013 Delicious! 362 00:16:50,090 --> 00:16:52,855 Poor child. Have you never had caviar? 363 00:16:52,926 --> 00:16:55,361 You must be so sheltered and naive. 364 00:16:55,429 --> 00:16:57,364 Well, I'm certainly not as worldly 365 00:16:57,431 --> 00:16:59,297 and experienced as some. 366 00:16:59,366 --> 00:17:00,977 Perhaps the Earl would like to hear a story 367 00:17:01,001 --> 00:17:02,594 of a woman who's been ridden by more men 368 00:17:02,669 --> 00:17:04,729 than the London Underground. 369 00:17:04,805 --> 00:17:06,364 Or... 370 00:17:06,440 --> 00:17:08,739 perhaps the Earl would like to see a recent photo 371 00:17:08,809 --> 00:17:10,437 of a woman with a mustache. 372 00:17:11,979 --> 00:17:14,744 I'm not sure that I would, actually. 373 00:17:14,815 --> 00:17:16,455 Who do you want the Earl to end up with... 374 00:17:16,517 --> 00:17:18,213 Joy Mouse or Jill Mouse? 375 00:17:18,285 --> 00:17:19,844 Of course I'm rooting for Joy. 376 00:17:19,920 --> 00:17:21,498 Well, obviously I'm rooting for Joy, too. 377 00:17:21,522 --> 00:17:23,821 - Yeah, but it's gonna be Jill. - Totally. 378 00:17:23,891 --> 00:17:25,335 I mean, we're writing a children's book, 379 00:17:25,359 --> 00:17:27,954 not "How Joy Mouse Got Her Groove Back." 380 00:17:29,329 --> 00:17:33,357 And then I said, "Middleton? I thought you said Wimbledon." 381 00:17:35,702 --> 00:17:37,814 Reminds me of the time I was invited to the Duchess of... 382 00:17:37,838 --> 00:17:38,999 Oh. 383 00:17:39,072 --> 00:17:40,005 What? 384 00:17:40,073 --> 00:17:42,042 Do I have something on my tooth? 385 00:17:42,810 --> 00:17:44,278 No. 386 00:17:44,344 --> 00:17:45,607 Quite the opposite, actually. 387 00:17:45,679 --> 00:17:49,241 Seems you have a tooth on your something. 388 00:17:49,316 --> 00:17:50,784 Oh. 389 00:17:50,851 --> 00:17:52,149 Excuse me, won't you? 390 00:18:04,198 --> 00:18:05,257 Goodness. 391 00:18:05,332 --> 00:18:07,767 That woman's a bit of a disaster, isn't she? 392 00:18:08,468 --> 00:18:12,872 Perhaps you and I could go somewhere a little more private. 393 00:18:12,940 --> 00:18:14,203 Oh. 394 00:18:16,910 --> 00:18:18,071 I'd love to. 395 00:18:18,145 --> 00:18:20,546 But that disaster is my sister. 396 00:18:20,614 --> 00:18:22,412 And she needs my help. 397 00:18:22,482 --> 00:18:24,110 Would you excuse me? 398 00:18:24,184 --> 00:18:26,119 - Honey, are you all right? - Are you hurt? 399 00:18:26,186 --> 00:18:27,119 I'm fine. 400 00:18:27,187 --> 00:18:29,315 Just hideously embarrassed. 401 00:18:29,389 --> 00:18:30,482 Let me help. 402 00:18:30,557 --> 00:18:32,617 Jill, what about the Earl? 403 00:18:32,693 --> 00:18:34,059 You took a tumble. 404 00:18:34,127 --> 00:18:36,687 It's my turn to pick you up and dust you off. 405 00:18:36,763 --> 00:18:38,197 On your feet, Cabbage. 406 00:18:38,265 --> 00:18:40,325 She looks like a pirate. 407 00:18:40,400 --> 00:18:42,528 All that's missing is a parrot on her shoulder. 408 00:18:42,603 --> 00:18:45,471 All that's missing is my fist in your throat. 409 00:18:46,740 --> 00:18:50,199 Jill, that's so sweet. 410 00:18:51,845 --> 00:18:54,337 Let's save the smiles till we get home, shall we? 411 00:18:54,414 --> 00:18:56,542 Thank you. 412 00:18:57,084 --> 00:18:59,315 There's the end of our story... 413 00:18:59,386 --> 00:19:01,321 The sisters choose each other. 414 00:19:01,388 --> 00:19:04,552 Oh, I love the way we write. 415 00:19:10,063 --> 00:19:12,430 Thanks again for leaving the Earl for me. 416 00:19:12,499 --> 00:19:14,866 Oh, well, there are dozens of royals, 417 00:19:14,934 --> 00:19:16,527 but I only have one sister. 418 00:19:16,603 --> 00:19:18,162 And there will be other men. 419 00:19:19,139 --> 00:19:21,665 Please tell me sex is better than caviar. 420 00:19:21,741 --> 00:19:24,176 They're both better with vodka. 421 00:19:29,282 --> 00:19:33,151 But if I could offer a piece of big-sister advice... 422 00:19:33,219 --> 00:19:36,189 When it comes to men, be patient. 423 00:19:36,256 --> 00:19:38,316 You may have to kiss a lot of frogs 424 00:19:38,391 --> 00:19:40,257 before you find your prince. 425 00:19:40,327 --> 00:19:42,193 Pardon me. 426 00:19:42,262 --> 00:19:43,753 Or not. 427 00:19:43,830 --> 00:19:47,289 I believe you left your boot wheel behind. 428 00:19:47,367 --> 00:19:50,201 Oh, Joy. It's like "Cinderella." 429 00:19:50,270 --> 00:19:53,206 Oh, sweetie, I don't think he's here for me. 430 00:19:53,273 --> 00:19:56,107 Yes, while you're both extremely charming women... 431 00:19:56,176 --> 00:19:58,645 - You don't have to. - Right. 432 00:19:59,846 --> 00:20:02,091 I thought it was very lovely the way you left the party early 433 00:20:02,115 --> 00:20:03,777 to take care of your sister, but... 434 00:20:03,850 --> 00:20:05,682 I wanted to get to know you better. 435 00:20:05,752 --> 00:20:08,881 Would you consider joining me for a drink? 436 00:20:10,690 --> 00:20:11,690 I'd love to. 437 00:20:11,725 --> 00:20:13,455 Oh, would you give me a minute? 438 00:20:13,526 --> 00:20:15,825 - I'll meet you by the car. - Of course. 439 00:20:17,664 --> 00:20:20,395 - 47th in line to the throne! - You could be queen! 440 00:20:20,467 --> 00:20:21,662 You could be Pippa! 441 00:20:21,735 --> 00:20:23,897 Then what are you waiting for? Go. Have fun. 442 00:20:23,970 --> 00:20:26,838 Oh. 443 00:20:32,078 --> 00:20:35,105 Poor, poor Joy. 444 00:20:36,816 --> 00:20:37,816 ♪ Hey! ♪ 445 00:20:41,621 --> 00:20:43,954 ♪ Ba-ba, ba-ba ♪ 446 00:20:44,023 --> 00:20:46,515 ♪ Ba-ba, ba-ba ♪ 447 00:20:46,593 --> 00:20:51,156 ♪ Ah, ah, ah ♪ 448 00:20:51,231 --> 00:20:53,564 ♪ Ba-ba, ba-ba ♪ 449 00:20:53,633 --> 00:20:55,932 ♪ Ba-ba, ba-ba ♪ 450 00:20:56,002 --> 00:21:00,531 ♪ Ah, ah, ah ♪ 451 00:21:03,877 --> 00:21:05,470 ♪ Hey! ♪ 32238