All language subtitles for Faking It s02e16 Faking It... Again.eng

Previously on "Faking It"...

I want to stay in Austin
'cause my daughter needs me.

I'm not gonna tell Daddy.

This stepsister thing
isn't so bad.

Just stay.
Please stay.

I can't.

I wish I didn't have
to think about this.

I wish I hadn't given you
a reason to.

Can I stay here for a while?

Have you ever had
your heart broken?

Yeah.
There's no magic bullet.

So according to this book,
my love color is teal,

while Liam's is
more of a magenta.

Of course we couldn't
make it work!

What did you get
from your book?

Liam is from Mars,
and you're from Venus?

Thanks for doing this
with me.

That's what best friends
are for.

Just remind me how the hat
helps again.

Now is the time for me
to be figuring out who I am.

Like, I didn't think
that I used to be a hat person,

but maybe I am, and maybe
if I had been a hat person,

I could have made it work
with Liam.

You don't have to be any kind
of person but a Karma person.

So I should probably
lose the hat?

Yeah.

[indistinct chatter]

Mom?

Karma.

Oh, my God, the Karma!

- Wait, no, um...
- Oh, my goodness.

You must be Amy.
We've heard so much about you.

I'm Debbie. This is Jackie.
We're in your mom's PFLAG group.

We were just finalizing plans
for our fund raiser.

It's a hoedown.

Now, Jackie, I thought we agreed
we're calling it a square dance.

Yeah, well, a hoedown
sounds so much more fun,

doesn't it, girls?

Oh, and you two
have to come.

Everyone's dying
to meet you.

- Why?
- Uh...

Well, Molly's told us
all about you.

Karma and Amy,
the out proud

and madly in love
lesbian couple.

I know.
I'm so sorry.

I can't believe you haven't
told PFLAG I'm not a lesbian.

That woman Jackie is gunning
for my presidency,

and her son is actually gay.

If she found out the truth,
she would overthrow me

and keep me from
all the good work I'm doing.

I mean, it's one thing
for you to live a lie,

but you can't make us
live one too.

Yeah, we're really trying
not to do that anymore.

You're right.

I'm gonna meditate on this

and think about what's led me
to this point.

Dad, can you just stop powering
the house for one second?

Don't be mad
at your mother.

I mean, after the year
we've had, you know,

losing the house
and the business,

her PFLAG group is all she has.

Aww.

Molly's been working so hard
on this fund raiser, you know.

It would mean the world to her
if you two would go.

Together.

As a couple.

Dad, do you not see
how insane that is?

- I mean, Amy, do you...
- Yeah, we could do it.

Mm-hmm.

How could you even
consider this?

Well, your mom's always
been there for me,

and if us being
a couple helps her,

then I want to do it.

[sighs]

Yeah, but won't it be weird
for you?

Why would it be weird?

Ohh.

If you're worried
about my feelings,

there's nothing
to worry about.

That's ancient history.

Okay.

Great, then it's not weird
for me.

Let's be lesbians.

Again.

[country music]

Oh!

The guy you just killed
looked just like Duke.

I wonder what he's doing
right now.

I don't know,
working out?

What do you think the odds are
he's wearing a shirt?

- Low, right?
- You are dead.

Oh! Shane, we've been
at this game for two weeks,

and we're so close
to beating it.

Simmer down, it's just a game.
You're obsessed.

I'd rather obsess
over a video game

than obsess over an ex,
like you are.

This one's newish, right?

[gags]

Ugh!

Yeah, I'm the sad one.

You're right.

We used to be Liam and Shane.

We were hookup hunters,
and the world was our prey.

It's time to pick up our spears,

'cause we're gonna get
back on that horse.

I had a horse once.
I loved it, but it ran away.

You're the one that taught me,

the best way to get over someone
is to...

Get back together with them.

No!

[Bleep], you're right.

- We will start tonight.
- Yeah!

Now, I don't want
to rush you,

but Becky's waiting,
and it wasn't easy

getting this appointment.

Maybe we should skip it.

Since she does your hair,
I'd probably just end up

looking like a big whore.

[chokes]

Lauren.

What is wrong with you?

You have not been
yourself lately.

I think I know why.

You do?

Well, yeah,
you're still mad at me

for what we talked about
at the pageant.

Yep.
That's why I'm upset.

(Bruce) Well, it's no reason
to take it out on poor Farrah.

She didn't do anything wrong.

I can't be here anymore.

What in the...

(Amy)
That is too funny.

Oh, God, you're all still here.

We thought you'd be out by now.

We were just gonna
watch some TV.

And then I was gonna leave.

I could do that now.
I'm gonna leave now.

No, Hank, listen.

Hey, nice to finally meet you,
man.

Been telling Farrah
to invite you over.

You free for dinner?

(all)
No.

No, uh, I'm gonna be
with Amy later

at this PFLAG square dance.

(Amy)
Mm-hmm.

What PFLAG square dance?

And who would pee on a flag?

Parents and Friends
of Lesbians and Gays.

So you told your dad
about all of that?

(Amy)
Yeah, and he totally gets it.

It's so nice to have a parent
who supports me for once.

[upbeat music]

Do we have to do anything?

Oh, no, no, no, no, no.

The important thing
is that you're here.

And if you're moved to,
you can lend an ear

as people open their hearts
and share their experiences.

- Whoo-hoo!
- Do it, cowboy.

[cheers]

When does
the heart opening start?

- Whoo!
- Jackie?

What is all this?

And what on earth is that?

A human tumbleweed.

[laughs]
Isn't it everything?

You were supposed to run
any changes by me.

I'm the president.

I'm the social chair,

so it is my job
to put on a fabulous event.

It is called a fun raiser
for a reason.

Fund raiser, you forgot the D.

That's a first.

How is this event
supposed to help anyone?

Help them with what?
We should be celebrating.

We got the fun kids.

Oh, speaking of which, you girls
have got to meet my son.

Honey.

This is Shane
and his friend Liam.

This is Karma
and her girlfriend, Amy.

Don't you all go to Hester?

No, no, no, no, no.
They're not...

Friends with us yet.
[laughs]

Let's change that, shall we?

[country music]

I think they have
drama together.

This is not healthy,

and you're talking
to someone

who puts aside time
to smell Duke's old shirts.

Shane, it's fine.

I don't have feelings
for Karma anymore.

They went away
when I fell for Reagan.

You covered them up
when you fell for Reagan.

Now the Regan Band-Aid's off,
and you're pouring salt

into your open,
gaping Karma wound.

Damn her
and her selfish schemes.

It wasn't even my scheme.

Right, so Amy convinced you
to pretend to be a couple again?

- Yes.
- [scoffs]

It was this whole thing
with my mom and her PFLAG group.

And... [sighs]
Can you just not say anything?

I'll do you one better.

I'm pretending
you're not even here.

Why are you even here?

Oh, let me guess.

You and Shane are hitting on
gay guys and their girlfriends.

That's none of your business,
but yes.

Old Liam is back.

Old Amy isn't back,
and to keep it that way,

I have boundaries.

No more romantic speeches,
no more hand holding,

no slow dances, and voila,
no feelings.

- What's his deal?
- Being all know-it-all-y.

Yeah, Liam too.

Can we just... ignore them
and be girlfriends?

Yeah!

Who's ready to open
their hearts and minds

in a share circle?

Or you can open your legs and
jump on that mechanical bull.

Oh, but you can't go now

because Karma and Amy
were just about to share.

Aww.

Oh, no, I don't think
anyone wants to hear us.

No, we... we actually
weren't planning on sharing.

But everyone here is dying to
hear your beautiful love story.

Please.

[country music]

What the [bleep] is this?

It's the PFLAG hoedown.
We're here to support you.

And your sister,
who has two supportive parents.

Where is she, by the way?

I heard you loud and clear
today, baby girl.

You're upset with me,

so I wanted to show you
that I support you.

Every day that I'm with Amy,
I just feel like

the luckiest girl
in the world.

We're not only best friends
and lovers,

but, um, we're soul mates.

I'm sorry, did you say lovers?

Mom?

You two are faking it again?

When I came here to support you,
this isn't what I had in mind.

Please, you only came here
to one-up Dad... it's so obvious.

If he had even bothered
to show up,

I'm sure he would agree
that this charade

is totally unhealthy.

I don't see the harm.

I'm sorry I'm late.

Amy explained everything to me.

See, Dad gets it,
as usual.

Now if you'll excuse me,
my fake girlfriend

is waiting for me.

[sighs]
Fake girlfriends, huh?

I can never keep track
of what these kids are into.

[cheering]

Come on, Show Pony.
You love dancing.

And it'd be a great way
for you to meet the people

in your community.

This is not my community,
there is no I in PFLAG.

Actually, they're inclusive
of everyone.

I called the national office.
They're real nice folks.

Hey, how you doing?
I'm Bruce.

This is my daughter, Lauren.

Nice to meet you,
Lauren and Bruce.

Lauren's an intersex.
What's your kid have?

[gasps]

Hon...

But Duke's biggest muscle of all
was his heart.

- Mm-hmm.
- Also his quads.

I'm sorry, I'm just dealing with
some trust issues from an ex.

Can we start over?

We just realized
that we have to go...

- Leave the country.
- Pee.

Did they just rip cord us?

[grunts]

Staying number one
in your class

can't leave a lot
of free time, I know.

I don't see how it would.

On top of that,
you spent spring break

building habitat houses
in Mexico?

My God, Debbie,
it's your favorite song.

Let's go dance.

- Can you believe that?
- I know.

Like you could ever
build a habitat.

[chuckles]

Is my mom proud of me
for anything real?

No wonder I'm so good
at lying about myself.

It's in my DNA.

We can't let our moms
ruin our night.

Let's just forget about
this PFLAG stuff and have fun.

You're right.

And there is something
I've always wanted to try.

[laughter]

This isn't real, right?

Maybe since we're rooming
together,

we've started
sharing nightmares.

Is it just me, or does
that bull remind you of Duke?

Uh, what is my single, handsome
son doing just standing around?

I'm sorry, but Duke is gone.

You just need
to get over that and move on.

And you... what happened
to Liam Booker, teen Lothario?

The 12-year-old that used to hit
on my 18-year-old daughter?

What is the one thing
I always taught you?

The best way
to get over someone is to...

Get under someone else,
Mom, we know.

Ooh, you should get
under that guy.

I guess I...

could give it a shot.

That's it. That's my boy.
You go get him.

Do not talk about Duke.

And if you don't come home
with his phone number,

I'm taking away your Xbox.

All right.
Now let's find someone for you.

Uh, no, no, no,
don't bother.

The Liam Booker
you were talking about?

After Karma and I broke up,

I thought I could go back
to being that guy.

I'm just not him anymore.

Did you say Karma?

[both laughing and cheering]

[both scream]

(all)
Oh.

- Get off me.
- Here, let me help you up.

Sorry I body slammed you.
You okay?

I'm fine.

Ugh, your hair, let me fix it.

Thanks.

[pop music]

(all)
Aww.

Such a cute couple.
You should be proud.

Too bad they're faking it.

Karma, grab your stuff.
We gotta go.

Why, did you tell your friends

that I have a space launch
to get to?

Actually, Jackie knows
you're faking it,

and we gotta leave
before she tells everyone.

What was I thinking?
Lying is wrong.

Why did you tell all
of these people lies about me?

Am I that disappointing?

No, honey, no, no, no.
This is not about you.

This is about me.

[sighs]

I don't know
if you can understand this,

but sometimes I say
and do things that I think

will make people like me.

And I hate that about myself,

that I care so much
about what these people think.

But I don't think
that I can stand to stay here

and watch Jackie
tell everyone that I lied.

It's okay if you want to go,

but, Mom,
if these people only like you

because of something
that isn't real,

then they don't actually
like you.

And they're not worth
all of this.

How did my daughter
get so wise?

By pretending to be
a lesbian.

[both laugh]

Honey, there you are.

Your father and I
are having such a good time.

[laughs]

I'd forgotten
how funny he is.

Look, I'm sorry
I was so quick to judge earlier.

I know how complicated
things can be with a first love.

I just didn't want you
holding on to hope,

like I did with your father.

You know what, it's years later,
and he's finally here.

I mean, for you, I mean.

Mom...

I'm just saying
maybe people really can change.

Oh.

[alternative music]

Lauren?

Hi.
What are you doing here?

My dad thinks I belong here
because I'm... you know.

Here.
Put that on.

He's so clueless.

Farrah's screwing Amy's dad,

and I have to keep it a secret
or else my dad gets hurt.

And then his idea
of supporting me is dragging me

to this PFLAG hoedown
and humiliating me.

What the [bleep]
are you doing?

Okay.

Look, if it makes you
feel any better,

I moved out
a couple weeks ago,

and my parents,
they haven't even called.

They don't know where I am,
and they don't care.

At least your dad's trying.

I can't believe I'm getting
family advice from Liam Booker.

You sure you don't want
to ride the bull?

I shouldn't.
It's a trigger.

Ha, you're funny.
Really funny.

You know, people usually use
humor as a defense mechanism,

so I guess the question is,
what are you defending?

- Uh...
- Uh, wow.

I'm sorry,
that happens sometimes.

My parents are therapists.

Since you brought it up,

I just went through
a terrible breakup,

and I was trying
to make jokes

to keep me from talking
about Duke,

because now that I've started
talking about him,

I'll never stop.

- I should go.
- No, no, wait.

I'm gonna time you.

You have ten minutes
to talk about Duke.

Timer's up, I'm gonna start it
over and talk about my ex.

We just broke up last week,

and I've been overanalyzing
the hell out of it.

But we'll get to that.

And... go.

Uh, okay, don't judge,

but our first kiss
was behind a dumpster.

Where was the second kiss?

[mellow country music]

Thanks for saving a dance
for your old man.

I was being too hard on you.
I know you're doing your best.

Listen, when I first found out
about your condition,

you know, your mother
wasn't around to talk to.

I didn't know what to do,

and I was just trying
to protect you.

I thought keeping
this whole thing secret

was a way to do that.

And I was wrong.

I am... I'm proud
of my intersex daughter!

[laughs]

[cheers and applause]

Listen to me,
you'll always be my baby girl.

All right, I love you.

So from now on,
no more secrets.

This has been okay, right?
Not too weird?

No, no way.
It's been fun.

It has been fun,
hasn't it?

No boy drama,
no girl drama.

No giant check drama.

Just you and me.

I wish it could always
be like this.

Me too.

[microphone feedback]

Um, excuse me, everyone.

I have an announcement
to make.

My daughter, Karma,

is straight.

[crowd murmuring]

I let you all believe
that she was gay

because I wanted it to be true,

but I have to accept the fact
that my daughter

will never, ever be a lesbian.

But despite this, she has
many other wonderful qualities.

She's kind and caring, creative.

Oh, she has
the most beautiful voice.

Oh, and she was so quick
to potty train.

Mom!
Mom, that's enough, thanks.

Yeah.

I would rather resign my post

than change one single thing
about my daughter.

[applause]

I cannot believe
they're getting off scot-free.

Get used to it.

We're proud to have you
as a friend and president.

Well, that was nice.

I know, I know.

I want to, I do, I just promised
my kid I'd stick around.

I... I gotta go.

[sighs]

You should take the job.

No.
I promised you.

And I love
having you around,

but it's not good for Mom.

[sighs]

You being here,
all fun and charming,

it just lets her
have hope again.

Hope? Oh, hey.
Your mom does not want me back.

She's always gonna be
in love with you,

and as long
as you're around,

she's just gonna keep
getting sucked back in.

I wanted to be here
for you.

So visit more.

Just call me next time?
No more motel getaways with Mom.

[chuckles]

Come here.

Deal.

Amy, there you are.
Have you seen your father?

[sighs]
He's gone, Mom.

He took the job.

[sighs]
Of course he did.

I'm done lying to my dad.

It wasn't fair of me
to keep this from him,

and it wasn't fair of you
to ask me to.

He deserves to know
the truth.

And he needs to hear it
from you.

There's my family.

I was just talking
to the nicest folks.

Their son's a bisexual.

Bruce, honey?
Would you drive me home?

We need to talk.

[country music]

You know, it's funny.

When I joined PFLAG,
all I really wanted

was to help people
learn and grow.

[phone buzzes]

But the person who really
needed to learn and grow was me.

_

Is that Amy?

Yeah, she had to go.

Oh, you look really bummed
about that.

Are you sure you're straight?

Mom, I am not gay.
Let it go.

Okay, okay, I'm sorry.

And I accept you.

Thank you.

You know,
I dated a woman in college.

Mom!

Stacy.

She was the gentlest lover.

Keep talking,
and I'm gonna stop dancing.

[laughter]

Ahh!

Sasha, hi.
You're home.

Liam, you've grown.

[both chuckle]

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