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1
00:00:04,495 --> 00:00:07,764
Excuse me. You'll have to go
through the checkpoint.
2
00:00:07,799 --> 00:00:09,498
Sir?
3
00:00:09,534 --> 00:00:10,066
Ma'am?
4
00:00:10,101 --> 00:00:14,439
I'm sorry, but I see a male
queue and a female queue.
5
00:00:14,507 --> 00:00:15,840
I happen to be neither.
6
00:00:15,875 --> 00:00:19,611
So, if I were to be patted down
by either a male or a female, it
7
00:00:19,646 --> 00:00:23,881
would be a violation of
my constitutional rights.
8
00:00:23,950 --> 00:00:27,685
Okay. You can go through.
9
00:00:27,721 --> 00:00:30,755
The overwhelming evidence against
Mr. fiocchi, combined
10
00:00:30,790 --> 00:00:33,857
with the brutal nature of these
crimes, leaves this court no
11
00:00:33,926 --> 00:00:38,027
choice but to find the defendant...
If you would just take a seat in
12
00:00:38,062 --> 00:00:40,662
the men's section.
13
00:00:40,697 --> 00:00:43,565
The women's section?
14
00:00:43,600 --> 00:00:45,734
What are you?
15
00:00:45,770 --> 00:00:51,641
The last thing you'll ever see before
you get completely assassinated.
16
00:00:51,677 --> 00:00:55,012
[ People screaming ]
17
00:00:55,047 --> 00:00:56,413
[ Blows ]
18
00:00:56,448 --> 00:00:57,802
[ Screaming continues ]
19
00:00:58,098 --> 00:01:03,034
Sync & corrections by honeybunny
www.addic7ed.com
20
00:01:03,154 --> 00:01:04,721
Well, it's happened again.
21
00:01:04,756 --> 00:01:07,591
That damned hermaphrodite has
waltzed into the courts and
22
00:01:07,659 --> 00:01:10,026
blown away another judge--
third time this week.
23
00:01:10,095 --> 00:01:11,028
Chris: Ugh.
24
00:01:11,096 --> 00:01:12,729
Disgusting, these he/shes.
25
00:01:12,764 --> 00:01:13,396
Mm.
26
00:01:13,431 --> 00:01:14,564
Chris: [ Spits ]
27
00:01:14,633 --> 00:01:15,932
Brett: Yeah. [ Spits ]
28
00:01:16,000 --> 00:01:17,733
Chris: Brett, clean that up.
29
00:01:17,769 --> 00:01:19,835
Well, I say we bullet
this boychick.
30
00:01:19,904 --> 00:01:20,936
Easy, monsanto.
31
00:01:21,004 --> 00:01:23,738
It's our own fault for not
patting him/her down.
32
00:01:23,807 --> 00:01:26,942
The only legal way to catch it
is for one of you to get an
33
00:01:27,011 --> 00:01:31,113
injection of hormones that'll
temporarily turn you into a shim.
34
00:01:31,149 --> 00:01:35,485
Then you'll run a third security
line, and we'll finally stop
35
00:01:35,520 --> 00:01:38,488
this ungodly thing from
killing another judge.
36
00:01:38,490 --> 00:01:41,458
Chris: Well, that sounds like a
lot of fun, captain, but, uh,
37
00:01:41,493 --> 00:01:43,994
unfortunately, Chris monsanto
doesn't do things halfway.
38
00:01:44,030 --> 00:01:46,897
If you're gonna hook me up with
a coffee bean, there's no way
39
00:01:46,933 --> 00:01:48,032
I'm keeping my tea leaf.
40
00:01:48,101 --> 00:01:48,566
Sue!
41
00:01:48,635 --> 00:01:49,000
Huh?
42
00:01:53,740 --> 00:01:55,174
Susie: No. It's always me.
43
00:01:55,209 --> 00:01:56,642
Congrats, young lady.
44
00:01:56,711 --> 00:01:58,644
You just earned
yourself a bonus.
45
00:01:58,679 --> 00:01:59,845
Susie: Money bonus?
46
00:01:59,914 --> 00:02:00,546
Oh, no.
47
00:02:00,615 --> 00:02:03,816
I was referring to the bonus
genitals you'll be sprouting.
48
00:02:03,852 --> 00:02:05,085
Susie: [ Scoffs ]
49
00:02:05,419 --> 00:02:08,521
This testosterone should put
you right in the gray zone,
50
00:02:08,557 --> 00:02:11,891
making you neither man nor woman,
yet, at the same time, both.
51
00:02:11,927 --> 00:02:13,459
Susie: How long does it last?
52
00:02:13,528 --> 00:02:15,362
It should wear off
in about a day.
53
00:02:15,430 --> 00:02:17,798
May I have your arm, please?
54
00:02:20,601 --> 00:02:23,102
Good morning, sir. Ma'am.
55
00:02:23,171 --> 00:02:24,537
Guess I'll be going through.
56
00:02:24,572 --> 00:02:30,643
Susie: [ Deep voice ] Can you
please extend your arms?
57
00:02:30,678 --> 00:02:32,144
You can't take that from me.
58
00:02:32,179 --> 00:02:33,145
I know my rights.
59
00:02:33,180 --> 00:02:34,813
Susie: Go [Bleep] yourself.
60
00:02:34,849 --> 00:02:40,151
Can and do.
61
00:02:40,187 --> 00:02:42,820
[ Applause ]
62
00:02:42,889 --> 00:02:45,523
Chris: So, I looked the guy
square in the eye, and I say,
63
00:02:45,558 --> 00:02:46,858
"okay, pal, you've convinced me.
64
00:02:46,893 --> 00:02:47,725
You're innocent."
65
00:02:47,761 --> 00:02:49,694
Unfortunately, I was
just looking at his eye.
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00:02:49,729 --> 00:02:52,363
The rest of him was in a
watery grave somewhere.
67
00:02:52,432 --> 00:02:55,600
[ Laughter ]
68
00:02:55,635 --> 00:02:57,401
Oh, you must be the new guy.
69
00:02:57,436 --> 00:02:58,703
Susie: Very funny.
70
00:02:58,738 --> 00:02:59,704
[ Bell rings ]
71
00:02:59,739 --> 00:03:02,607
Chris: Ah. And that, my
friends, is quitting time.
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00:03:02,642 --> 00:03:06,445
Hey, yo, little dude, the boys and I are
gonna go out for a couple of drinks.
73
00:03:06,513 --> 00:03:07,613
You want to come along?
74
00:03:07,648 --> 00:03:08,580
Susie: Really?
75
00:03:08,616 --> 00:03:09,615
Chris: Yeah, sure.
76
00:03:09,683 --> 00:03:10,849
It'll be guys' night out.
77
00:03:10,885 --> 00:03:14,052
I'll show you the ropes--
the guy ropes.
78
00:03:14,121 --> 00:03:14,986
[ Laughter ]
79
00:03:15,055 --> 00:03:16,688
You know something, guys?
80
00:03:16,723 --> 00:03:20,526
There is nothing like some solid
man time to talk about what we
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00:03:20,594 --> 00:03:22,595
do and do not like
the ladies to wear.
82
00:03:22,630 --> 00:03:23,062
[ Belches ]
83
00:03:23,130 --> 00:03:25,598
Brett: I'm a skirts-and-dresses
kind of guy.
84
00:03:25,666 --> 00:03:29,334
When they wear pants, it
makes me want to puke!
85
00:03:29,403 --> 00:03:30,769
Chris: Boo-yah!
86
00:03:30,805 --> 00:03:31,770
[ Laughter ]
87
00:03:31,806 --> 00:03:34,707
I like a nice b'keen
with all the fixins.
88
00:03:34,776 --> 00:03:35,341
[ Laughter ]
89
00:03:35,410 --> 00:03:36,508
Hey, little dude, how about you?
90
00:03:36,544 --> 00:03:37,042
What do you like?
91
00:03:37,111 --> 00:03:39,778
You know what I like
to see a lady in?
92
00:03:39,847 --> 00:03:43,482
The kitchen. [ Laughs ]
93
00:03:43,517 --> 00:03:47,052
Chris: Yeah, wearing what?
94
00:03:47,121 --> 00:03:48,054
A b'keen.
95
00:03:48,123 --> 00:03:49,856
Chris: Yeah! A b'keen!
96
00:03:49,891 --> 00:03:51,057
Brett: B'keen!
97
00:03:51,126 --> 00:03:53,493
[ Laughter ]
98
00:03:53,562 --> 00:03:55,930
Chris: You know
something, little dude?
99
00:03:55,965 --> 00:03:58,533
You are a-okay all right
tiptop in my book.
100
00:03:58,601 --> 00:04:00,401
Susie: A-okay all right tiptop?
101
00:04:00,470 --> 00:04:01,335
Chris: Yeah.
102
00:04:01,404 --> 00:04:05,506
Susie: [ Laughs ]
103
00:04:05,575 --> 00:04:09,577
[ All cheering ]
104
00:04:09,612 --> 00:04:11,946
[ Laughter ]
105
00:04:20,890 --> 00:04:22,090
Right, guys?
106
00:04:22,126 --> 00:04:23,825
[ Laughter ]
107
00:04:26,596 --> 00:04:28,030
Susie: [ Normal voice ]
108
00:04:28,065 --> 00:04:28,997
Morning, guys.
109
00:04:29,033 --> 00:04:30,866
[ Laughs ]
110
00:04:33,470 --> 00:04:35,004
Chris: Okay, let's
hop to it, guys.
111
00:04:35,040 --> 00:04:37,841
We've got a deranged professor
holding a college library hostage.
112
00:04:37,876 --> 00:04:39,576
Susie: Okay, you
heard him, gang.
113
00:04:39,611 --> 00:04:40,010
Let's move.
114
00:04:40,045 --> 00:04:43,113
Chris and I will take the squad car, and then --
Chris: Honey, no, no.
115
00:04:43,148 --> 00:04:44,748
This is nothing for
a lady to see.
116
00:04:44,783 --> 00:04:45,649
You stay put, okay?
117
00:04:45,684 --> 00:04:46,850
Has anybody seen little dude?
118
00:04:46,885 --> 00:04:48,485
I could really use
him on this one.
119
00:04:48,554 --> 00:04:51,855
Brett: Probably took a couple chicks
home from the bar last night.
120
00:04:51,891 --> 00:04:55,559
Chris: Oh, that is so
classic little dude.
121
00:04:55,628 --> 00:04:57,461
[ Laughs ]
122
00:05:07,438 --> 00:05:09,005
Susie: [ Growls ]
123
00:05:09,073 --> 00:05:09,705
Aah!
124
00:05:09,741 --> 00:05:11,841
Chris: Little dude, you made it!
125
00:05:11,876 --> 00:05:14,443
All: [ Chanting ] Little dude!
126
00:05:14,479 --> 00:05:16,645
Little dude! Little dude!
127
00:05:16,714 --> 00:05:18,547
Little dude!
128
00:05:22,753 --> 00:05:25,087
[ Growls ]
129
00:05:25,122 --> 00:05:27,823
Chris: Hey, has anybody
seen Susie around lately?
130
00:05:27,892 --> 00:05:30,626
Brett: Oh, I think she
disappeared a few days ago.
131
00:05:30,661 --> 00:05:32,361
Chris: Must be lady troubles.
132
00:05:32,396 --> 00:05:32,894
Am I right?
133
00:05:32,930 --> 00:05:35,464
[ Laughter ]
134
00:05:35,499 --> 00:05:38,467
A bit of a disturbing case
today, gang -- a series of
135
00:05:38,502 --> 00:05:40,602
attacks on local
livestock last night.
136
00:05:40,638 --> 00:05:42,971
Witnesses say they saw
some kind of creature.
137
00:05:43,007 --> 00:05:44,639
Susie: [ Deep voice ] Yeah!
138
00:05:44,708 --> 00:05:46,908
Let's get this thing!
139
00:05:46,977 --> 00:05:48,543
Very nice, little dude.
140
00:05:48,611 --> 00:05:51,145
Goats were fine
when I went to bed.
141
00:05:51,180 --> 00:05:53,447
Then, come sunup, shredded.
142
00:05:53,482 --> 00:05:54,347
Can you imagine that?
143
00:05:54,416 --> 00:05:57,717
Next, it'll probably be
my sheep, my dog, cows.
144
00:05:57,785 --> 00:05:59,819
[ Speaking indistinctly ]
145
00:06:10,430 --> 00:06:14,500
Chris: Hey, little dude, farmer Wilson
over here turned out to be a real dud.
146
00:06:14,535 --> 00:06:16,535
We're not gonna get
anything from him.
147
00:06:16,571 --> 00:06:17,503
[ Goat squeals ]
148
00:06:17,538 --> 00:06:19,706
Brett: Little dude,
what are you doing?!
149
00:06:19,774 --> 00:06:21,874
Chris: Brett, it's
called police work.
150
00:06:21,943 --> 00:06:24,777
He's imitating the killer to
try to get inside its mind.
151
00:06:24,813 --> 00:06:28,615
It's good to know that at least one
of my partners isn't a complete mook.
152
00:06:28,684 --> 00:06:31,618
[ Laughs ]
153
00:06:31,654 --> 00:06:33,854
Brett: Little dude this,
little dude that.
154
00:06:33,889 --> 00:06:36,590
All Chris can talk about is
how great little dude is.
155
00:06:36,625 --> 00:06:37,524
Tell me about it.
156
00:06:37,593 --> 00:06:38,792
Little dude ain't so hot.
157
00:06:38,827 --> 00:06:40,861
He's just a ball of
fur with some teeth.
158
00:06:40,896 --> 00:06:42,496
I know. That's what I'm saying.
159
00:06:42,531 --> 00:06:43,497
I don't know, guys.
160
00:06:43,532 --> 00:06:45,398
I think little
dude's pretty cool.
161
00:06:45,434 --> 00:06:47,600
If I was you, Brett, I'd
blow my brains out.
162
00:06:47,636 --> 00:06:48,668
Shut the [Bleep] up!
163
00:06:48,703 --> 00:06:52,071
You're just jealous because Brett's
always coming to me for advice.
164
00:06:52,140 --> 00:06:54,507
That's because all you
do is kiss his ass!
165
00:06:54,542 --> 00:06:57,744
Aah! Bretts, stop fighting!
166
00:06:57,779 --> 00:07:00,580
[ Crying ] I'm sorry.
167
00:07:00,615 --> 00:07:04,517
[ Sobbing ]
168
00:07:04,585 --> 00:07:06,852
Now you'll like me, Chris.
169
00:07:06,921 --> 00:07:11,657
Now you'll like me
better than little dude!
170
00:07:11,692 --> 00:07:15,961
Susie: [ Snorts ]
171
00:07:16,030 --> 00:07:18,397
Oh, no.
172
00:07:18,466 --> 00:07:22,734
Chris: Ah-da-Dee-Dee.
173
00:07:22,769 --> 00:07:25,737
Sir, if you want that taken in,
there's a tailor down the block.
174
00:07:25,772 --> 00:07:28,840
Marshal, my farm was attacked
last night by a leaping beast
175
00:07:28,875 --> 00:07:30,375
with a semi-human face.
176
00:07:30,410 --> 00:07:32,777
Chris: Hmm, Jackie
chan must be in town.
177
00:07:32,845 --> 00:07:34,044
Brett: Hiya, Chris.
178
00:07:34,113 --> 00:07:35,679
Sorry I'm late.
179
00:07:35,714 --> 00:07:37,014
Do you like me now?
180
00:07:37,049 --> 00:07:38,048
That's him!
181
00:07:38,083 --> 00:07:39,950
T'weren't no beast at all!
182
00:07:39,985 --> 00:07:42,319
T'was a hair-faced idiot man!
183
00:07:42,388 --> 00:07:43,654
Chris: Brett?
184
00:07:43,689 --> 00:07:44,655
Brett: Yeah.
185
00:07:44,724 --> 00:07:45,823
T'wits me, buddy!
186
00:07:45,858 --> 00:07:47,024
You solved the case!
187
00:07:47,093 --> 00:07:49,760
Do you like me now?!
188
00:07:49,829 --> 00:07:54,097
So, you see, your honor, my client, a.K.A.
Me, a.K.A. The
189
00:07:54,133 --> 00:07:58,936
town's infamous animal shredder, a.K.A.
"Shredsie" to local
190
00:07:59,005 --> 00:08:04,543
tall-tale tellers, was behind
the whole thing, but only if it
191
00:08:04,578 --> 00:08:07,946
means that Chris will like me.
192
00:08:08,015 --> 00:08:11,550
Well, I have little choice but to
pronounce you, Brett mobley, guilty --
193
00:08:11,618 --> 00:08:13,485
Susie: Wait!
194
00:08:13,554 --> 00:08:14,019
It was me.
195
00:08:14,054 --> 00:08:14,753
[ All gasp ]
196
00:08:14,788 --> 00:08:15,553
Chris: No.
197
00:08:15,588 --> 00:08:16,287
Brett: No!
198
00:08:16,356 --> 00:08:18,423
Susie: It's true.
199
00:08:18,458 --> 00:08:19,824
Here.
200
00:08:19,860 --> 00:08:21,459
I was saving it for later.
201
00:08:21,494 --> 00:08:24,829
Well, it pains me to do this
to the coolest little guy in
202
00:08:24,864 --> 00:08:28,566
town, but I hereby pronounce you
guilty of animal slaughtery.
203
00:08:28,601 --> 00:08:31,902
And since we can't send you
to human prison or the zoo, I
204
00:08:31,937 --> 00:08:35,372
hereby sentence you to life
at brinks prison island for
205
00:08:35,407 --> 00:08:39,375
creatures, hybrids, albinos,
and other unholy abominations.
206
00:08:39,444 --> 00:08:42,612
And may God have mercy on
your ugly monster soul.
207
00:08:42,647 --> 00:08:44,580
Case closed!
208
00:08:49,553 --> 00:08:51,888
[ Electronic whirring ]
209
00:08:55,759 --> 00:08:58,361
Welcome home.
210
00:08:58,430 --> 00:09:01,698
Susie: Home.
211
00:09:01,734 --> 00:09:04,635
The creatures at brinks
became like a family to me.
212
00:09:04,704 --> 00:09:07,972
The human world rejects us
just because we're different,
213
00:09:08,008 --> 00:09:09,441
but we don't need them.
214
00:09:09,510 --> 00:09:10,909
Yeah. We got each other.
215
00:09:10,978 --> 00:09:14,447
It's what's inside that counts.
216
00:09:17,551 --> 00:09:19,452
[ Applause ]
217
00:09:19,521 --> 00:09:23,056
Susie: Then one day, when the
hormones wore off, I awoke.
218
00:09:23,092 --> 00:09:27,727
[ Normal voice ] And
I was Susie again.
219
00:09:27,796 --> 00:09:30,063
Ugh! Who the hell are you?!
220
00:09:30,131 --> 00:09:31,631
Where's little dude?
221
00:09:31,700 --> 00:09:32,966
Susie: It's me!
222
00:09:33,001 --> 00:09:34,900
This is how I normally look.
223
00:09:34,936 --> 00:09:36,802
[ Vomits ]
224
00:09:36,871 --> 00:09:38,537
You're not one of us.
225
00:09:38,572 --> 00:09:42,874
But, glorm, I thought you said that
it's what's inside that counts.
226
00:09:42,942 --> 00:09:45,343
Uh, glorm say a lot of things.
227
00:09:45,412 --> 00:09:46,611
Go home, normo!
228
00:09:46,680 --> 00:09:50,782
Susie: You guys are just
like everybody else!
229
00:09:50,851 --> 00:09:51,783
Yikes.
230
00:09:51,819 --> 00:09:53,686
Time of the month, huh?
231
00:09:53,721 --> 00:09:56,055
More like bitch of the year!
232
00:09:56,091 --> 00:09:58,424
[ Both laugh ]
233
00:10:01,395 --> 00:10:04,063
Susie: I'm marshal Susie Wagner.
234
00:10:04,098 --> 00:10:05,698
I was just visiting.
235
00:10:05,767 --> 00:10:08,134
I'd like to go home.
236
00:10:19,611 --> 00:10:21,946
[ Laughter ]
237
00:10:36,830 --> 00:10:41,034
[ Telephone rings ]
238
00:10:41,759 --> 00:10:43,159
Guess who's back!
239
00:10:43,194 --> 00:10:45,762
Both: Little dude!
240
00:10:45,764 --> 00:10:55,439
Sync & corrections by honeybunny
www.addic7ed.com
241
00:10:55,507 --> 00:10:59,176
To the tattoo of their boots
242
00:10:59,245 --> 00:11:02,179
goodbye, Susanna
243
00:11:02,229 --> 00:11:06,779
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