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1
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Zachary, you're gonna be late.
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00:00:07,251 --> 00:00:10,521
What is all this?
3
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I don't know.
4
00:00:13,627 --> 00:00:15,595
[ School bus horn beeps ]
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00:00:15,631 --> 00:00:18,232
We'll talk about this
when you get home.
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00:00:18,267 --> 00:00:22,237
Oh! Oh.
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00:00:22,305 --> 00:00:24,306
Zachary?
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Sync & corrections by honeybunny
www.addic7ed.com
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00:00:42,202 --> 00:00:44,822
There's an organ thief on
the loose in Elmwood Park.
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The victim's are all
married couples.
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Chris: Why would somebody want
to steal organs from corpses?
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I didn't say they were dead.
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00:00:51,415 --> 00:00:53,448
Chris: You said
they were married.
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Pow!
15
00:00:53,817 --> 00:00:55,049
Brett: Ha ha. Pow!
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Are you drunk, Monsanto?
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00:00:56,720 --> 00:00:57,720
Chris: So what?
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00:00:57,788 --> 00:01:03,361
Let's take a look at the
photos here, Cappie.
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00:01:03,430 --> 00:01:04,530
Susie: Wow.
20
00:01:04,565 --> 00:01:06,265
The spelling is awful.
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00:01:06,300 --> 00:01:07,600
Brett: Yeah.
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00:01:07,635 --> 00:01:09,702
Huh.
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I know.
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00:01:11,373 --> 00:01:14,809
They're all gonna find
out you can't read.
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We suspect that kids are
somehow behind this.
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You three are gonna go undercover
and throw a slumber party.
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Susie: You want to
use us as bait?
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Here's your cover story -- you are Mort
and Irene, an aging, childless couple.
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One day, Mort's low-life brother,
Burt, came to visit, unannounced.
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It wasn't long before Burt was giving
it to Irene on a steady basis.
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I mean, not that
Mort cares, really.
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It had been so long since he had
any sensation in that creamy nub
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he called a penis that he forgot
what it felt like to be a man.
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Susie: Okay.
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What about the slumber party?
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Let me finish.
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In what could only be taken as
a cruel joke, Irene decided to
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host a slumber party for the
neighborhood children, filling
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their joyless home with the
playful young voices that Mort's
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00:02:00,597 --> 00:02:02,965
cloopy cheese dick
could never provide.
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00:02:03,034 --> 00:02:05,768
Susie: But if we have to be
asleep when they try to steal
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00:02:12,011 --> 00:02:15,579
That way, if someone tries
to steal them, Kapow.
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[ Spits ]
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Son of a bitch!
45
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Brett: Hey, kids.
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Come on in, guys.
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Susie: Aww, there you go.
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00:02:26,093 --> 00:02:27,326
Brett: Hi.
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00:02:27,395 --> 00:02:29,295
Susie: [ Laughs ]
50
00:02:29,331 --> 00:02:31,331
Chris: Any one of these
scumbags our guy?
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00:02:31,366 --> 00:02:32,332
Susie: I can't tell.
52
00:02:32,401 --> 00:02:34,335
They all look like
psychopaths at this age.
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Chris, stop drinking.
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00:02:35,972 --> 00:02:37,038
Chris: Oh.
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00:02:37,106 --> 00:02:39,774
Hey, kids, want
to have some fun?
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00:02:39,809 --> 00:02:40,675
All: Yeah!
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00:02:40,744 --> 00:02:44,479
Chris: Knock
yourselves out, scum.
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Brett: Guess it's time to get on
the old Snoozetown express, huh?
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00:02:53,690 --> 00:02:58,860
Good thing I got my passport
and my ticket and money for
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00:02:58,929 --> 00:03:03,933
snacks -- 50 snooze bucks, the only type
of money they accept in Snoozetown.
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00:03:04,001 --> 00:03:05,568
Oh, no.
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I can't find my snooze bucks.
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Nobody likes you, Brett.
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Susie: All right.
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Goodnight, guys.
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00:03:23,790 --> 00:03:27,025
Chris: See you guys next spring.
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[ Grunts ]
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Oh, yeah.
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00:03:30,931 --> 00:03:32,564
Susie: [ Humming ]
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00:03:32,599 --> 00:03:33,832
[ Alarm clock blaring ]
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Chris: Okay, I'll get up.
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[ Smooching ]
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[ Alarm stops ]
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Oh! Ah.
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Oh, they got me.
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00:03:44,878 --> 00:03:48,813
Okay, they got my kidneys
and, great, the liver.
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00:03:48,848 --> 00:03:52,549
Susie: Oh, they got
my liver, too.
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And my ovaries.
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00:03:54,820 --> 00:03:55,819
Chris: Eh, big loss.
80
00:03:55,854 --> 00:03:58,455
I bet those empty egg cartons
were filled with pure oxygen.
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00:03:58,524 --> 00:04:00,357
They probably floated
off on their own.
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00:04:00,393 --> 00:04:01,092
Brett.
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00:04:01,127 --> 00:04:03,294
Brett: What?
84
00:04:03,329 --> 00:04:04,528
Chris: Brett.
85
00:04:04,564 --> 00:04:05,830
Did you take our organs?
86
00:04:05,899 --> 00:04:09,000
Brett: You mean the ones you
stole form Tommy tumbles?
87
00:04:09,035 --> 00:04:10,468
Chris: Okay. What?
88
00:04:10,537 --> 00:04:11,736
Brett: Oh, yeah.
89
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I found out all about it
last night from Silly Sammy.
90
00:04:15,008 --> 00:04:18,376
I couldn't get to sleep after
that duck got all in my head, so
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00:04:18,411 --> 00:04:21,546
I went downstairs to hang out
with my new best PS, who just
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00:04:21,582 --> 00:04:24,550
happened to be watching my
favorite late-night kids show,
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00:04:24,585 --> 00:04:27,620
"Sammy" with Silly Sammy.
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00:04:27,655 --> 00:04:28,821
Hey, kids.
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Are the grown-ups sleeping?
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00:04:30,991 --> 00:04:35,527
Good, because there's something I want
to tell you about, and it's not easy.
97
00:04:35,562 --> 00:04:38,629
It's about my good
friend Tommy tumbles.
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00:04:38,665 --> 00:04:39,964
Tommy's not well.
99
00:04:40,000 --> 00:04:42,000
And you know why?
100
00:04:42,069 --> 00:04:46,271
Because your parents
stole his organs.
101
00:04:46,340 --> 00:04:51,343
They stole the precious insides from
this tender tumbler lying here tonight.
102
00:04:51,378 --> 00:04:52,544
How you doing, "T"?
103
00:04:52,579 --> 00:04:54,946
I'm tired, Sammy,
but I'm hanging on.
104
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[ Weakly ] I got to get up.
105
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I got to make the kids smile.
106
00:04:58,518 --> 00:05:00,351
No. Just lie down.
107
00:05:00,420 --> 00:05:01,987
Just rest, my friend.
108
00:05:02,055 --> 00:05:04,322
You'll be okay.
109
00:05:04,357 --> 00:05:09,761
He won't be okay unless you
help him get his organs back.
110
00:05:09,796 --> 00:05:11,430
Do you think you could do that?
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All: Yeah!
112
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Brett: Yeah, Sammy!
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Here's what you need
to do to save Tommy.
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Oh
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00:05:18,939 --> 00:05:21,807
first you take your scalpel,
and then you take a pen
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make a lateral incision
across the abdomen
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you locate all the organs --
kidneys, heart, and spleen
118
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use some bacitracin to
keep them nice and clean
119
00:05:31,886 --> 00:05:35,688
oh, you clamp off the arteries
and pop the goodies out
120
00:05:35,723 --> 00:05:38,958
a snip here, a snip there,
that's what it's all about
121
00:05:39,026 --> 00:05:41,794
put them in the icebox
before they get all clammy
122
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Brett:
and now it's time to send
them off to good old Silly Sammy
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[ Laughs ]
124
00:05:46,834 --> 00:05:48,701
Susie: You memorized
the whole song?
125
00:05:48,736 --> 00:05:49,502
Brett: Yeah.
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00:05:49,571 --> 00:05:50,603
He sings it every show.
127
00:05:50,638 --> 00:05:53,039
Chris: Well, I guess we got
to get down there to that
128
00:05:53,074 --> 00:05:55,741
Silly Sammy's studio and give
that clown a pie in the face.
129
00:05:55,777 --> 00:05:57,777
And by "pie," I mean a
hollow-point bullet.
130
00:05:57,812 --> 00:06:01,013
And by "face" -- well, actually, "face"
kind of works there, doesn't it?
131
00:06:01,049 --> 00:06:02,748
Brett: Let me get this straight.
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00:06:02,784 --> 00:06:06,318
I'm gonna get to kill
Silly Sammy in person?!
133
00:06:06,387 --> 00:06:08,488
Chris: Well, Brett,
we'll see, okay?
134
00:06:08,556 --> 00:06:09,288
We'll see.
135
00:06:09,324 --> 00:06:11,223
Brett: [ Laughs ]
136
00:06:13,393 --> 00:06:14,460
Susie: No one's here.
137
00:06:14,495 --> 00:06:16,596
Chris: Uh, hold on a
second, eggs mcnothin'.
138
00:06:16,631 --> 00:06:17,296
What's that?
139
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Susie: "Closed for
private event."
140
00:06:18,967 --> 00:06:21,367
Brett: Come on, guys.
141
00:06:29,610 --> 00:06:32,746
Ladies and gentlemen, your
host for the evening,
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00:06:32,814 --> 00:06:36,015
Mr. Sampson Hidler.
143
00:06:36,051 --> 00:06:37,951
Brett: Sampson?
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Friends, I present to you the
finest black-market organs that
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money can buy.
146
00:06:44,327 --> 00:06:45,492
Brett: Sammy, no.
147
00:06:45,561 --> 00:06:48,929
Have you ever noticed that
everything fun is bad for you?
148
00:06:48,965 --> 00:06:51,298
Well, not anymore it isn't.
149
00:06:51,367 --> 00:06:56,437
Finally, you can drink all night
and swap out your liver in the
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00:06:56,472 --> 00:06:57,371
morning.
151
00:06:57,406 --> 00:07:02,309
You can do all the cocaine you
want with your very own blow nose.
152
00:07:02,378 --> 00:07:04,011
Brett: Sammy, don't.
153
00:07:04,046 --> 00:07:08,014
Crystal meth is bad
for your lungs.
154
00:07:08,050 --> 00:07:11,351
That's why you don't
have to use your lungs.
155
00:07:11,387 --> 00:07:12,352
Brett: Don't.
156
00:07:12,388 --> 00:07:18,826
And it isn't cheating on your wife if
you strap on our patented...party dink.
157
00:07:18,862 --> 00:07:21,362
Brett: Sammy, do-o-o-n't.
158
00:07:21,431 --> 00:07:29,439
Our first item up for auction tonight
is a mint-condition male stomach.
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00:07:29,474 --> 00:07:31,542
Brett: Tommy tumbles.
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00:07:31,577 --> 00:07:32,843
He's not sick.
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00:07:32,912 --> 00:07:34,812
Time to grow up, Brett.
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Brett: You lied to me!
163
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Get him!
164
00:07:39,018 --> 00:07:40,785
[ Grunts ]
165
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Aaaah!
166
00:07:43,356 --> 00:07:46,357
[ Shudders ]
167
00:07:46,392 --> 00:07:47,825
[ Squealing ]
168
00:07:47,860 --> 00:07:51,729
[ Punches landing ]
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Show's over, marshals.
170
00:07:53,833 --> 00:07:57,367
And for my final joke, I'm
gonna blow your heads off.
171
00:07:57,402 --> 00:07:58,435
Susie: You tell jokes?
172
00:07:58,470 --> 00:08:00,069
Chris: Uh, Silly Sammy,
wait a second.
173
00:08:00,105 --> 00:08:01,905
You know, we're not
here to kill you.
174
00:08:01,940 --> 00:08:04,607
Um, we're here to
help you make money.
175
00:08:04,642 --> 00:08:05,641
I'm listening.
176
00:08:05,677 --> 00:08:07,810
Chris: Well, you
need organs, right?
177
00:08:07,879 --> 00:08:09,411
Well, we're U.S. marshals.
178
00:08:09,447 --> 00:08:10,679
We kill people all day.
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00:08:10,714 --> 00:08:12,247
We're lousy with organs.
180
00:08:12,282 --> 00:08:14,716
You'll give me your
dead people's organs?
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00:08:14,785 --> 00:08:18,953
Chris: All of them.
182
00:08:18,988 --> 00:08:22,990
You jut said the magic word...
"Organs."
183
00:08:23,059 --> 00:08:24,625
You got yourselves a deal.
184
00:08:24,694 --> 00:08:25,693
Chris: Great.
185
00:08:25,762 --> 00:08:29,698
How about a little
celebratory crystal meth.
186
00:08:29,733 --> 00:08:30,699
Chris: Uh, sure.
187
00:08:30,767 --> 00:08:31,900
Well, that sounds good.
188
00:08:31,935 --> 00:08:32,867
Uh, just one question.
189
00:08:32,903 --> 00:08:35,604
Do you mind if we get our
own personal organs back?
190
00:08:35,639 --> 00:08:36,772
Yeah, yeah. No problem.
191
00:08:36,807 --> 00:08:39,508
But I got to warn you, I don't
got a lot of meth, and I smoke
192
00:08:39,543 --> 00:08:41,677
it really fast, so...
Chris: I'm sure you do.
193
00:08:41,712 --> 00:08:45,781
Okay, well, thank you very much.
194
00:08:45,850 --> 00:08:47,049
Ovaries.
195
00:08:47,085 --> 00:08:50,319
Bet those empty egg cartons
were filled with pure oxygen.
196
00:08:50,388 --> 00:08:51,687
Liver.
197
00:08:51,756 --> 00:08:53,022
Are you drunk, Monsanto?
198
00:08:53,057 --> 00:08:54,023
Chris: So what?
199
00:08:54,058 --> 00:08:55,658
Susie: Chris, stop drinking.
200
00:08:55,693 --> 00:08:56,892
Drinking.
201
00:08:56,961 --> 00:08:58,327
Drinking.
202
00:08:58,396 --> 00:09:00,062
Chris, come on downstairs.
203
00:09:00,097 --> 00:09:03,799
I just pissed all over
your Hanukkah presents.
204
00:09:03,868 --> 00:09:04,700
[ Thuds ]
205
00:09:04,736 --> 00:09:06,869
Susie: [ Echoing ] Drinking.
206
00:09:06,904 --> 00:09:07,970
Chris: Hmm.
207
00:09:08,005 --> 00:09:11,607
One whiskey-soaked liver and
one set of ovaries filled with
208
00:09:11,676 --> 00:09:12,775
nothing but pure oxygen.
209
00:09:12,843 --> 00:09:14,777
Here we go.
210
00:09:20,051 --> 00:09:21,418
Brett: Mm.
211
00:09:21,453 --> 00:09:27,858
Tomorrow's episode of "Silly
Sammy" is gonna be weird.
212
00:09:27,926 --> 00:09:30,027
A great job on the case, gang.
213
00:09:30,062 --> 00:09:33,397
Thanks to your lifelong
alcoholism and your decrepit
214
00:09:33,432 --> 00:09:36,501
lady parts, we were able to
bust up the entire ring.
215
00:09:36,569 --> 00:09:38,302
Chris: Thanks a lot
there, captain.
216
00:09:38,371 --> 00:09:39,303
Good night, guys.
217
00:09:39,339 --> 00:09:42,406
Chris: Good night, captain.
218
00:09:49,346 --> 00:09:52,448
Irene, I'm home.
219
00:09:52,484 --> 00:09:54,016
What, do you want a parade?
220
00:09:54,051 --> 00:09:55,484
You old bowl of soup.
221
00:09:55,553 --> 00:09:56,852
Anything for dinner?
222
00:09:56,887 --> 00:09:59,921
Uh, there's a half a loaf
of bread in the icebox.
223
00:09:59,957 --> 00:10:02,290
I'm gonna take a nap
in Burt's room.
224
00:10:02,359 --> 00:10:04,393
Try not to make too much noise.
225
00:10:04,462 --> 00:10:07,997
Oh, and that package
came for you.
226
00:10:15,772 --> 00:10:18,740
"Dear captain, after we took
down Silly Sammy, we returned
227
00:10:18,809 --> 00:10:22,010
all the organs to their rightful
owners, but there was still one
228
00:10:22,079 --> 00:10:23,545
body part unaccounted for.
229
00:10:23,580 --> 00:10:26,281
If you happen to find it, take
it for a spin around the block
230
00:10:26,349 --> 00:10:31,819
for us, would you?"
231
00:10:31,887 --> 00:10:34,721
A party dink.
232
00:10:34,757 --> 00:10:39,893
Irene, I'd like to see you...
In our bedroom.
233
00:10:39,928 --> 00:10:50,163
Sync & corrections by honeybunny
www.addic7ed.com
234
00:10:50,213 --> 00:10:54,763
Repair and Synchronization by
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