All language subtitles for Due South s04e01 Dr Longball.eng

Y'all talking to the wrong guy, massah.

I got to go, and I can't drive
with my foot like this.

How about you? You look like
you could use some fresh air.

I hate fresh air.
Why don't you get vecchio?

- Vecchio is on holiday.
- Yeah, where?

That club couples place
in mexico.

Vecchio, club couples?
Who with?

Remember that chick he busted
last month for passing bad cheques?

Oh, man, that's low.

I grovel once in a while,
but to bust a chick for a date?

The man has no standards.

What's going on here?
I'm talking about a day off with pay.

Yeah, but it's in the country,
lieutenant.

Good morning, sir.

Ah, constable. Come here,
I want to show you something.

What do you see in front of you?

- Photographs.
- That's america.

That is the heartbeat
of america.

I mean, white picket fences,
courtyard in the square,

cracker barrel
in the general store,

and all you have to do
is give me a ride up there.

I'll show you a place where people
still care about their neighbours,

where you can park your car
on the street all night

and it'll still be in one piece
in the morning.

You smell apple pie every day.

Sounds like home.

Although, of course,
we tended more

towards brown lichen tarts
than apple pie, but...

- right, right. Well,
we better get a move on,

to be in time for the game.

Game, sir?

And it's
a beautiful day for baseball

here in the tri-county region,
as the greater willison area...

where we don't just produce milk,
we produce goodness...

wraps up its week-long
festival of cheese

with a season-ending
three-game series

against cross-county rivals
the corrington crowns.

There's been no love lost

between these two teams this year,

as willison has yet to defeat
corrington in regular season play,

a season that's been a disaster
thus far for the hawkeyes,

with the team rife
with dissension,

much of it centred around the play
of vaunted slugger kelly olsen.

Olsen is in the throes
of a season-long slump,

wihch, barring a turnaround,
could end his career.

Love you, son.

Love your hairstyle,
but I'm telling you,

you got to swing at least
hard enough to crack an egg.

- Hawkeyes manager huck bogart,
with two more victories,

would enter the record book

as the "winningest" manager
in minor-league history.

- That's the juice
I'm looking for.

That's a nice cut.

- But amidst rumours
that his contract won't be renewed,

this may be his last shot
at the record book.

Hey, romeo.

We got this thing
called practice.

Ladies.

- And just about the only bright spot
for the hawkeyes this season

has been the play
of mid-season acquisition

pete consentino,
whose play down the stretch...

hits like that one...
ho, ho!...

they tell you you're going
to see a lot more of this guy.

You know, baseball
has its ups and downs, folks.

It's just like life.

I guess that's why
they call it...

america's pastime.

Shut her down! Don't move!

Don't!
- Ah!

- Hector!
- Shut up! Come on, move it!

- Move it, move it!
Let's go, let's go!

Hector.

Oh, my...

- so he graduates
from the police academy,

he works a year in chicago,
then he comes up here

to nowheresville
to take a sheriff's job.

Real waste
of some great training.

- I wasn't aware
you had a brother, sir.

- Anyway, he calls me
and he's freaking out.

It seems there's a crime wave
here in nowheresville.

I mean, arson
at the local factory,

the stores being broken into,

somebody's trying to sabotage
the local baseball team.

Well, after I stopped laughing...

- you find this funny, sir?
- Yeah, well, after you've seen

14-year-olds killed by hypos, yeah.

- Point taken.
- It's vandalism.

You know, bleachers collapsing,

somebody's poisoning the food
concession, stuff like that.

That does sound serious, sir.

- That's why we're here.
We're the pros from dover.

I figure we could wrap
this up maybe in an hour.

Constable...

can I ask for your advice?

My advice, sir?

Yeah, your advice.

If I can help.

- If you had somebody
you were trying to forgive,

no matter how hard
you try to forgive him,

you just couldn't forgive him,

what would you do?

Keep trying, sir.

All right, let's go.

- Excuse me, folks.
Can we get through here?

Yeah, thanks.

What the hell is going on?

The players are walking off
the field!

There's been a robbery, huck.

They got the payroll.

And hector has been hurt.

- Who cares? We're ahead 6-1,
we forfeit the game.

A man is hurt, huck!

- He's not a man.
He's an accountant.

Look, we got to find money.

Two games to 3,000,
and I can't win them by myself.

- Winston.
- Olivia.

Are you all right?

- I'd be a damn sight better
if we had a sheriff with some stones.

Hey.

- I'm going to do something
about that, olivia.

- Thank you for your support,
mr. Mayor.

- Look, I've done everything
I can for you, welsh.

But nobody's going
to stand for this anymore.

We already lost johannson's
lumber mill to arson.

The department store closed
after that last robbery.

What the hell
do you expect me to do?

Keep you on till every business
we have is run out of town?

- I told you,
I've called for outside help.

Experts in the field.

- Your dog's got a bladder
the size of a zeppelin.

- Salty food. I can't seem
to keep him away from it.

You see something?

'Afternoon.

You get a number?

Yes, I did.

- Mm-hmm, they were heading
east out of town.

Not that that means anything.

Yeah, just have your troopers
keep an eye out for me, walt.

Thank you.

Harding.

Wilson.

What happened to your foot?

Ah, a junkie.

Chicago.

What happened to the junkie?

They had to wire his jaw.

Gum?

Sure.

So these are your headquarters,
huh?

Yeah.

Just like the city,

only smaller.

Bernie,

get on out to the truck stop
at the interstate.

See if anybody saw anything.
- You got it, chief.

- Hey, who's that? She's...
- deputy.

Like a detective, you know,
just like the city.

Gentlemen.

There it is.

It's the stadium payroll.

- And I imagine you'll be wanting
to speak with this fellow.

The other two got away,

but we got a good look at them.
- Rusty barnstead,

what have you gotten yourself
into this time?

You know this guy?

He ever stop crying?
- He's upset.

- Yeah. He wasn't upset when
he cracked that guy's skull in.

Can I talk to you a minute?

We got guys in chicago

could put out cigarettes
on their tongue and don't flinch.

- I walked rusty to school
on his very first day, okay?

You know, I live with these people.
It's a community.

You can't come here
and terrorize them.

You called me for help.

- And I want your help, but this
is willison. It's not chicago.

You got to respect that.
- You called me for help.

Okay? I got my methods.

If you can live with them,
fine, I'll help you out.

If not, I'm out of here.

You just haven't outgrown it.

- What's that?
- Competing with me.

Competing for what?

Everything. For susie glesson.

For who's going to be
quarterback on the football team.

For who can sit on
the railroad tracks the longest.

I always could stay longer.

For dad's approval.

I never needed his approval.

Oh, no?

No. Let me tell you something.

How could I possibly compete
with all of this?

- I was hoping for more
than that, you know.

I was, I was...

I was hoping that...

forget it.

- It turns out that rusty
met the other two men in a bar

three days before the robbery.

They wanted a driver
who's familiar with the area,

so we can assume
they're from out of town.

I've taken the liberty
of removing

his belt, his shoelaces
and his wristwatch.

I also took the liberty

of placing him
into holding cell number 1.

And I would respectfully
suggest

that we get over to the stadium
as quickly as possible.

He's canadian.

Oh.

Someone...

is trying to screw me.

Plain and simple.

Whoa!

Coach.

- How many wins
did sal arpeggio have?

2,973.

That's right!

Watch it!

And jack macdonaugh?

2,999.

That's right!

Anybody ever go 3,000?

Nobody.

That's right! Nobody.

Because that record is mine.

Mine!

Look! Now my players
are walking out!

Well, deck me running!

Get me a coffee!

What?

Coffee!

Please?

As you wish, sir.

What the hell is that?

Terribly sorry, sir.

His name is diefenbaker.
He's half wolf.

Well, as a pup, he was mauled

by a wolverine with a goiter.

I can only assume that
the outfit your mascot is wearing

seems to have made him
relive the event.

And who the hell are you?

Huck, this is, uh...

lieutenant harding welsh
of the chicago police department,

and this is, uh,
constable fraser,

of the royal canadian
mounted police.

He first came to illinois
on the trail of his father's killer,

and for a number of interesting
reasons, he's stayed.

- Attached as liaison
with the canadian consulate.

- You're kidding me.
- No, sir, I'm not.

Welsh.

You any relation to him?
- Yeah, I'm his brother.

- Hope you're not as thick
as he is, 'cause if you are,

we should start
walking backwards now.

- Yeah, well, you keep talking,
mulch-mouth...

sir, sir, please.

This is a community.

Thank you.

- Mr. Bogart, if what I overheard
is accurate, you believe

that the attacks on the team
are directed at you personally?

Do you have any reason
to believe this?

Yeah, I got a reason.

This was on my desk this morning.

"You'll never reach 3,000."

Two games left to 3,000.

And now I got no team!

Fellas,

can I talk to you
for a minute, please?

Just for a minute. Thank you.

Look, I understand how you feel.

You hired on here
to play baseball,

not to be a part
of some nightmare sideshow.

I understand that.

My late husband
loved this ball team.

And his last wish,
when he was dying,

was that we win the pennant.

And I promised him we would.

Now, obviously that's not going
to happen this year,

but there's always the future,
right?

So I'm asking you,
stick with me.

Please. Two more games.

Finish the season.

'Cause I have a feeling
next year is going to be our year.

- Sing us another tune,
sweetheart.

- We recovered the money.
It's in the office.

Fellas, one more thing.

Your payroll.

It's in the office.

Yeah!

- Son, need to talk to you
in the locker room.

Sure thing, skipper.

You can't sit me down!

Put yourself in my position.

You got two games left
to break the record,

and the guy on first
is hitting. 189.

What would you do?
You'd put in consentino.

You miserable bastard.

There's a scout from the yankees
coming to look at me!

- Okay, you want to play hardball?
Let me show you how to play hardball.

They don't have to see you play

to know that
you're an over-the-hill lump

who's hitting 20 points below
his own body weight.

Them's the breaks.
That's baseball.

- Fraser,
I got to get off this foot.

We can talk at my spread.

- It's a beautiful setting
for a spread.

Yeah, nice spread.

Leave them.

He has a phobia
about pink flamingos.

Here it is.

Very nice. Beautiful woodwork.

It's a little small.

Well, I, uh, I got plans

to build something,
you know, but, uh...

you got a big place in chicago?

No, no.

Just about the same size.

- Well, uh,
I'll get the mug book.

Is this your father, sir?

Yeah.

Looks very proud.

- It was the proudest day
of his life.

That's when wilson graduated
from the police academy.

When I graduated,
he couldn't make it.

He was sick that day.

- If there was a sale
at the liquor store,

he'd have been there
on a stretcher.

Come on, harding.

Give him a break, huh?

He's an old man now.

He's broken down, he's sick.

Just let it go.

I let him go a long time ago.

Um...

here's the mug book.

Mug book? This is a mug page.

You got a crime wave going here,
and you got no criminals?

- Got no criminals
'cause I done a damn good job here

for the last 20 years.
- Yeah, well, maybe me and fraser

will go back to chicago, then,
let you handle it by yourself.

Constable, would you...

no, not at all.

Now, look.

I'm two years from retirement.
I'm about to lose my job.

I don't mind telling you
it scares the hell out of me.

I thought
you might want to help.

But if you just want to make fun
of what a small-town loser I am,

well, then, why don't you go on
back to your big-time cop shop.

I'm going for a walk.

- Sir, I've been thinking.
- This...

better have something
to do with baseball.

Oh, of course.

It occurs to me
that since this is a small town

and news travels fast, that
our presence here is likely known.

We should consider
the introduction of a third party

unknown to the town
who could infiltrate the clubhouse

and report to us
from the inside.

And that would be?

Your name will be ace leary.

- Man, I've gone to some lengths
to ditch a date, but this is new.

- The relationship didn't work,
I take it?

- The plane barely touched down
in acapulco and she took up

with this guy who was selling
ponchos on the street.

- Oh, so you didn't
get the girl, then.

No. Got this poncho.

It's very fetching.

- You realize I haven't swung
a bat in years, fraser.

- You used to work out
with the cubs, didn't you?

That was a long time ago.

- They're only looking
for someone who can hit. 380.

- .380.
- Mm-hmm.

They think I can hit. 380?

Mm-hmm.

- I'm dead.
- Oh, no, you can do it.

It's like riding a bicycle.
You never really forget, do you?

- Look, I was exaggerating,
fraser.

I was embellishing.

Haven't you ever exaggerated
or embellished?

No.

And in any case,
it's only for a couple of games.

The main thing
is that you find the saboteur.

If you don't want to play,

they'll come up
with some excuse to bench you.

- What are you saying?
I can't cut it?

I can cut it.

Name's bubba dean.

Welcome to the funhouse.

- So you're the hotshot
from the great white north, eh?

Where'd you play?

Uh... moose jaw.

- Huck says
you've been hitting. 380.

What do they throw up there,
anyway?

Curveballs, sliders, fastballs,
forkballs, hmm?

Mostly, uh, snowballs.

- Well, down here,
they throw heat.

- Ace leary?
- Um...

toni lake, action sports.

Ace leary,

somewhat of a mystery man
signed out of the canadian league.

Ace, are you concerned at all
about fitting in with this new league

so late in the season?
- I just want to go out there

and help the team any way I can.

Can I put clothes on for this?
- Don't worry, sweetheart,

unless of course you canadians
have something I haven't already seen.

- Uh, you know,
I'm gonna take it,

you know, game by game,

and go out there and do my best
and try not to play with myself.

I mean play within myself.

- You want to buy the team,
show me the colour of your green.

A lot of towns
would like to have the hawkeyes.

Olivia, let's be honest.

The team
is practically bankrupt.

I'm just trying to bail you out

and give the town a boost.
- No, you're not.

You're trying to screw me.

Well, go ahead, buster, because...

Come in.

Constable fraser,
what a nice surprise.

Ma'am.

- This is winston cohoon,
our mayor.

- Ah, pleased to meet you, sir.
- Nice to meet you.

- The mayor and I were discussing
a business transaction.

So I heard.

- Oh... well,
you know small towns.

We know everybody.
We can speak frankly.

- Yes, that's true. Although,
you know, I have heard young ladies

on the streets of chicago discussing
business deals in very similar terms.

- Don't tell me, let me guess.
You're from canada.

Well, yes, sir, I am.

I love it up there.

Matter of fact, the council
and I were just talking about

the possibility of setting up
a cultural exchange

with medicine jaw.

- Medicine hat?
Yeah, that's the place.

We could send them a couple
blocks of illinois cheese,

and they could send us...

some beaver meat or something
in return.

Oh, I'm sorry.

Diefenbaker feels a particular
kinship with the beaver.

It's as if we were discussing,
well, eating a member of the family.

I see.

- Constable fraser's here
with a team of chicago detectives.

- Oh, you're the pros
that welsh brought down.

- That is correct, yes.
- How's it going?

- We have some very good leads,
and we're confident

that we will be able to apprehend
the men who stole the payroll.

- Good, it's about time we got
some decent police work in this town.

I'm glad to meet you.

Oh, hey, listen,
you want a block of cheese,

you just call my office.

Oh, thank you kindly.

You know, oddly, I have been
thinking about cheese lately.

Yeah.

So...

you're going to put a stop
to this, aren't you?

- Well, we are trying our best,
ma'am.

Do you mind
if I ask you a question?

Shoot.

- You are considering
selling the team?

- Well, I'm, uh...
i'm in negotiations.

- My mother's
got a better swing

than that...
she's been dead 20 years!

Ahhh!

Frase!

Frase, got to shut it off!

Shut it off!

Switch on the side!

Switch on the side of the machine.
Or you could do it that way.

I think my arm's broken!

Hey, birdbrain, you got $10?

Sure, huck.

- All right, call a cab
and get romeo to the hospital.

What the hell happened?

- Someone must've been screwing
with the machine.

You're kidding me.

Would that be what made
a pitching machine

change into a gatling gun?

- What is that?
- That's sarcasm, ace.

That's what I thought.

- It would appear that
there's a crucial gear missing.

- There's gonna be some heads
missing gears too,

I don't find out who did this.

Woody, you were in early.

Who did this?

- It was fine this morning,
huck.

Domingo, consentino

and anderson all took bp.
- Olsen!

Yeah, skipper?

You're back in the lineup.

Let's see if you can remember
how to hit a baseball.

You... you did this to me, huh?

- What the hell for?
- Get your place back in the lineup.

- You're full of crap.
- Boys, boys.

You like olsen for this?

Well, he does seem to have motive,

although I fail to see
how he could've predicted

that the injury
would fall to consentino.

- Timing... consentino
was first up after lunch.

Everybody knew that.

All right, jack, thank you.

So what have you been doing?

- I've been talking to people,
harding.

- You get information that way?
- Usually.

- Oh, what did you get
this time?

Not much.

- I made a call with a certain tone
of voice, and my guy jumped.

Turns out that grey k-car
was stolen in chicago

the night before the robbery.

We found it this morning.
Now, I got the mug books coming.

If they were pros,
maybe they're in the system.

That's what I've been doing.

You looking for something?

- Uh, all these lockers,
they, uh...

iook the same.

- Yeah? That's probably
why kelly has that big-ass

picture of himself on his.

Oh, yeah.

This is the gear, right?
- Yes, it is.

It's odd he would leave it
in his locker, though.

- So he's a doofus.
Olsen's still gotta be our man.

I've known kelly a long time.

He's done a lot of good
for the town,

always been there
for charity work.

- You saying a guy does charity,
he can't have a little ambition?

- No, but I don't think
he'd hurt anybody.

- Well, then we'll eliminate him
as a suspect, all right?

- Look, all I'm saying is that
I think we ought to move slowly.

You know, he's a very popular
guy in the community.

- All right, but the way I work
is you have motive, means,

some evidence, you pick him up.
Now, what's it going to be?

We'll pick him up.

- How the hell am I supposed
to win the game?

Olsen's not much, but he's all I got,
and you got him sitting in a cell!

- That's where you go
when you break the law, huck.

Come on, it was a prank.

- It was a prank that could've
resulted in someone's death.

- You grow up
in a public-service announcement?

Olsen didn't get to the clubhouse
till five minutes before practice.

No way he fixed that machine.

- Can he prove it?
- He was with me all morning.

Doing what?

Contract negotiations.

Are you seriously suggesting

that kelly olsen is responsible
for all this sabotage?

He's got an alibi.

Let him play ball.

- You know, I think, uh...
i mean...

- he had motive, he had opportunity.
He goes in front of the judge.

- Wilson?
- He goes before the judge.

- Welsh, if you continue to hold
this man, I'll have your badge!

- Well,
you'll have my badge then.

Big shots from chicago.

- Assuming that kelly's alibi
holds up,

we can conclude
that he was framed.

And it's likely
that whoever framed him

is behind the other acts
of sabotage. Shall we?

- Mm, that's one of them,
right here.

Alvin kopinka.
You got a fax machine?

Heads up.

That's him.

- Well, well, well,
what do you know?

They carpool. Very nice.

- You know what the real cause
of air pollution is?

- What's that?
- Not cars... lawn mowers.

- Hey, watch where you're going,
jerk!

Chicago p. d. Don't move.

- How do you do?
- Get out.

Get out.

- Got a permit for this?
- Yeah, I do.

Power mowers?

Sheriff welsh.

May I speak
with lieutenant welsh, please?

Yeah, go ahead, detective.

Lieutenant, we got kopinka
and his buddy, bobby letourneau.

And one of them
was carrying a phone number

written on a coaster from
the chiltingham hotel in chicago,

but the number
is in your area code.

Yeah?

- It's a pay phone
at the willison ball park.

Is it 555-0104?

Yeah.

- It's the phone in the concourse
outside of olivia's office.

I have a head for figures.

It's olivia.

Does she have a motive?

- I think
I can come up with one.

What?

Oh, wilson, you are so needy

around women.

- Just, olivia and i...
- yeah, yeah.

I rest my case.

Ah, mr. Proulx,

you're working today.
You must be feeling better.

- I got plenty to do, so I thought
I might as well come in and work

as lie in bed worrying about it.
- Where's olivia?

- Chicago.
- You know when she'll be back?

- Nope, never tells me.
Keeps a suite at the chiltingham.

You can try her there.
- Fraser!

Fraser!

As the hawkeyes
take the field, fans,

let me remind you about sunday's
cheese-sculpting contest...

- they're gonna play me, fraser,
put me in the game.

Ray, you can do this, you can.

Just like when you
practised with the cubs.

- Fraser, that was a fantasy camp.
- I don't understand.

- You pay $1,000, go to florida
with the salesman with the big gut

and the mutual-funds guy
with socks and sandals,

and the guy had no muscles,
the guy had...

ray... ray, ray, ray! Shh.

All right, now...

just keep your eye on the ball,
keep the ball in front of you,

keep the glove
in front of the ball,

relax, let muscle memory take over,
and above all,

you must try not to think.
- Not thinking got me into this.

Hey, know what they call third base?
- The hot plate?

- No, the hot corner. You know why?
- I have no idea.

- Neither do I,
but it doesn't sound good.

Uh, ray.

Oh, dear.

Have they got a first baseman?

- Certainly.
- All right.

What's his name?
- Who.

- The first baseman.
What's his name?

Certainly.

- Jethro.
- Howdy, sheriff.

Hi, homer.

Hey, you remember how dad
used to take us to the cubs games?

- Yeah, I remember when
he used to drop us off at the gate

and give the ushers
a few dollars to look after us.

Then he'd come and pick us up
after the game

and drive home
hammered out of his mind.

- I don't remember that.
- You don't want to remember that.

- Look, I know he was a lousy
father, and he treated us hard.

Hard on you?

There's nothing I could do
to please that guy.

Every other day, he was telling me
you were his only real son.

- And every other day, he told me
how you were his only real son.

Got to forgive him, harding.

- I don't know
what you're talking about.

I think you do.

It's olivia.

Let's get her.

No, I go alone.

I owe her this.

I'm going
to bring her in myself.

I know how to handle her.

I hear
you're thinking of selling.

That's none of your business.

- Well, what, you... you stuck
for the lease on the stadium?

Is that why you're sabotaging
your own team?

What do you want?

Maybe you're trying to cash in

on the force-majeure clause
in your insurance policy.

- All right,
we got our confession?

Do you mind?

Is this your brother?

Uh... harding, olivia.

- Boy, your parents must've been wading
in the shallow end of the gene pool.

- Yeah, it's still way uptown
from your tree.

Hey, hey.

- Do you have any proof?
Or evidence?

Or any of those legal
kinds of things

that usually go with these
conversations, wilson?

Or did you just want
to see me again, lover?

Look, I don't have a lease
on the stadium.

My late moron of a husband
bought the thing.

I own it.

So now I have to sell the team
with the stadium,

or I'm going to be stuck
with a chunk of property

that's not worth
a bucket of warm spit.

So listen, you fellas
want to talk to me,

you know where to find me.

And the hawkeyes
are just one out

away from victory.

Actually, he's half wolf.

...huck bogart will hit
that magic 3,000 mark.

But right now,
they've got to get through

the meat
of the corrington order.

And ace leary might find out

why they call it the hot corner.

Fraser, you hear that?

It's called the hot corner.

Leary!

The other way, deuce.

Yeah.

Lieutenant,
turns out this letourneau guy

has an alias.

He also goes by the name
of donny proulx.

The bookkeeper.

...is his uncle.

Count the seams.

Count the seams.
Count the seams.

Out!

I'm a damn genius.

- Oh... never going to hear
the end of this.

- I wasn't gambling.
I swear to god I wasn't.

We trust you, hector, okay?

We know you're a compulsive gambler,

but I know that you are
a scrupulously honest bookkeeper.

- Yeah, right.
Telephone-company records

for that pay phone
outside your office

lists 200 calls to a certain
bookie in new jersey.

How do you explain those calls?

I can't... unless, unless

someone wanted
to frame me for robbery,

hire my good-for-nothing nephew,
make it seem I was taking the money.

- The simple thing is you did it.
- I think there's a problem with that.

And what's that?

- He may have committed
the robbery to cover his tracks

if he was embezzling
from the team,

but he had absolutely no motive

for committing
the other acts of vandalism.

That would be a separate thing?

- Possibly, although I do think
all the crimes are related,

and that they revolve around the sale
of this team and of the stadium.

Furthermore, they all seem
to share a certain pattern,

or what you would call an m. o.

And what's that?

- Modus operandi.
- Exactly.

In each scenario,

we have a plausible suspect,

and ample evidence
to point to them.

- So it's got to be
someone inside.

- Someone who could move about
inconspicuously.

Oh, man.

We know it's you.

Now why'd you do it?

Huck.

Well, you saw how he treats me.

Big deal.

You wouldn't be the first guy

working twice as hard
to get noticed half as much.

Get over it.
- He stole olivia.

You and olivia?

Huck and olivia?

Kelly and olivia?

He's just a kid.

So you did it for revenge?

No, that was just the icing.

I was getting paid.

Well, here we have it,
folks, the final game of the season.

Now just a reminder to all
the fans here at the stadium,

please remain seated
after tonight's game

for the big fireworks display.

Now, please, won't you join me

and rise
for the national anthem,

sung by our very own toni lake.

Oh, say, can you see...

- okay, let's have a look
at your stance.

Okay.

Okay, um...

ray, you are a pull hitter,
so you need to close up your stance.

You lay off anything that's away.
You make him come to you.

Wait till it's in
your wheelhouse high and in.

And you have to protect
the plate, so lean forward.

Lower body forward.

Uh, that'll do.

Ready?

What on god's earth

was that, fraser?

Uh, cut fastball,
I believe they call it.

Ray, this time,
don't even try to hit the ball.

Just watch it as it comes in
and try to count the rotation

of the seams
as they come toward you.

- Count the rotations
of the seams.

Fraser, I can't even see it.
It's a blur.

- Oh, sure you can.
What are you talking about?

It was a strike on the corner.

Oh, great, blind and deaf.

...o'er the land
of the free...

and the home...

of the... brave...

It's hit deep, it...

it... is... out of here.

Gotta be feeling
for manager huck bogart...

as the hawkeyes come to bat in
the bottom of the ninth trailing 6-3,

with the bottom part of the order
coming to the plate.

- Move. Move.
- Excuse me. Excuse me.

- Move.
- Excuse me.

- Welsh, you getting ready
for your retirement?

I don't think so, mayor.

- Always better
to plan ahead, wilson.

As you did, sir.

- Been checking out
your land deals, mr. Mayor.

Seems you picked up
that burnt-out lumber mill,

the warehouse and the store.

- I bought some worthless property
to help out some friends.

Worthless property

that coincidentally adjoins
the land the stadium sits on.

- Which you're also
trying to buy.

What are you saying?

- Well, essentially that as mayor,
you had access to information

that makes this parcel of land
extremely valuable,

and you resorted to criminal
activity in order to acquire it.

Now, we've spoken to woody.

- I don't have to
listen to this.

- I think
that would be a confession.

- I'm not sure it would stand up
in a court of law,

but I think
in substance, we can...

guys.

Ooh, understood.

Bubba dean,
with three strikeouts

on the ninth, steps in.

Come on, bubba, come on, boy.

Baldini looks in
for the sign...

and into the wind-up,
kicks and deals.

Oh, he's killed dean
with a high hard one.

- That's taking one for the team.
Way to go, bubba!

- I guess the hawkeyes
will take baserunners

any way they can at this point.

They've loaded the bases with two out,
down 6-3 in the bottom of the ninth.

And I guess you could say the pressure
is on mystery man ace leary

as he makes his way
to the plate.

Ace, ace, ace...

ace!

Go get 'em, boy.

All right, hold it.

- How do you plan
to get away with this?

- You... you're my ticket
out of here.

Leary steps back in,

goes into that... unorthodox stance.

Baldini looks in, winds and delivers.

Strike one!

- Strike?
Are you out of your mind?

Well, well.

Two for the price of one.

Now, the three of us...

we're going to leave.

- How did you ever
get elected mayor?

You never got my vote.

Nice shot, brother.

Thanks.

High and in,
and it's ball three.

You know, uh... i'm trying.

Yeah, I know.

Count the seams.

Count the seams, count the seams.

Count the seams, count the seams.

Count the seams, count the seams.

The season
comes down to this.

Man against man,
a dream on the line.

They're going crazy here!

Ace leary

has come from out of nowhere

to rewrite baseball history

here in willison stadium.

Yeah!

Look at that, look at that.
Look at how I'm getting

that really good extension,
how I'm seeing the ball,

how I'm seeing it really good.

Actually, I am the ball.
Look at that.

We got to go.

- Only staying five minutes.
- That's fine.

How's the foot?
- Good, good, good.

Last time I kick a wastepaper basket.
- I thought it was a junkie.

Well, that sounded better.

What's in the package?

- A two-speed reversible
cordless weed weasel.

- See,
that's what I'm talking about.

Dad's been in that building
drinking for 25 years.

Last time he saw grass
was on the u. s. Open on espn.

What was it last year?
A power sander?

You're in denial.
- I am not.

- You are.
- I am not.

- Excuse me... sir,
I'm sure it's a wonderful gift,

although, as a rule,
I'm not sure

it's a great idea
to give power tools to alcoholics.

True enough.

Sir, if I may.

You know, he is your father.

He's your only father,
and there...

there are probably
sides to him that you don't know about.

I only say this because
I had a father, my only father,

and... well,
my advice to you is...

not to wait until he's dead
to discover those sides.

It tends to be
somewhat disorienting.

- Constable.
- Yes, sir.

- Giving advice
to your elders is...

- unbecoming?
- Unbecoming.

Understood.

- Okay,
who wants to see it again?

Oh, you got to love this wolf.

Okay, check out the stance.

High winds in northern sky

will carry you away

you know you have to leave here

you wish that you could stay

there's four directions on this map

but you're only going one way

due south

that's the way I'm going

due south

saddle up my travelling shoes
I'm bound to walk away these blues

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