Original subtitles

All right, what have we got here?

A, uh,

a tuna on white for Welsh,

a turkey on wheat for Huey...

and Elaine wanted the uh,

pastrami on sourdough.

Rye.

What?

Elaine wanted rye bread.

Eh, what's the difference?

Well, actually Ray...

the difference is considerable.

For one thing is ... Oof ...

I'm terribly sorry. Sorry.

You see, Ray, sourdough requires ...

Mark,

bring up number 38.

- Good afternoon ladies. - Afternoon.

Is there uh...

something in particular I can help you with?

What do you have that is...

ridiculously expensive?

Uh, They say a diamond's a girls best friend,

so I'll be happy to show you...

some of the best diamonds in the city.

I could use a few new friends, actually.

Well then,

make friends with these.

... In order to make the culture roughly four pounds,

[hang on a] second.

That woman looked straight at me.

So?

Well Ray, for a Muslim woman...

to make direct eye contact with a strange man,

it violates deep cultural traditions.

They're beautiful. I'll take them.

Uh, which piece would you like?

All of them. Now put them in the bag.

- Everyone down on the floor! - Quickly.

Nobody move!

Fraser, I don't think that's a violation...

under the Illinois Criminal Code.

[Alarm]

That is.

You! Over there. Hurry.

Get out from behind the counter!

Now quickly.

Police, drop your weapon!

- You drop yours! - That's not how it works.

We're walking out of here...

and if you try to stop us, I'll blow his head off.

Drop your gun!

- Drop it! - Drop it!

Drop it.

Nobody gets hurts.

Stay back from the door. Back.

Stay back.

Hey-hey listen,

- ...what are you some kind of terrorists? - Shut up!

Listen, I'm not some kind of politician.

- I don't even follow politics. - Shut up--quickly!

'Charming' Performed by She Stole My Beer

Anybody got a key?

Well, all of the river gonna make scream I'd in pain

I make it so easy when I'm driving insane

Well, that's the ??? for maintain arise

I'll take it to you wildest to the believe all my lies

I'm charming

Fraser!

I'm charming

I'm charming

I'm charming

You okay?

Fraser, you okay?

Yeah, I'm fine.

You're sure you're okay?

Who the hell are you?

Stop kidding around,

you know damn well who I am.

Who the hell am I?

Oh, dear.

Due South S02E18 "Flashback"

Memorial Hospital

It's a good thing your friend's got a hard head.

Oh, I'm glad someone else finally noticed.

There doesn't seem to be any concussion...

but the trauma of the impact...

seems to have induced a total loss of recall.

We've got a hostage who's life...

depend on something that Fraser saw,

is there anything we can do?

Well, exposing him to familiar things...

might jog his memory.

Friends. Places... Things you've done together.

Dr. Frank Hall to Maternity, please. Dr. Frank Hall...

Hey Fraser, how you feeling?

Who?

You, Fraser, that's your name.

F-r-a-s-i-e-r?

- No, F-r-a-s-e-r. - Ah,

and you would be?

Ray.

R - a - y?

That's correct.

Detective Ray Vecchio of the Chicago PD.

Am I under arrest?

No, you're not under arrest, you're a cop too!

You're Benton Fraser...

of the Royal Canadian Mounted Police.

- Oh, so we're in Canada. - No, we're in Chicago.

We're after some diamond thieves.

You've got their plate number.

- Ah. - Alright, uh,

maybe we should start at the beginning.

(Pilot)

You're father was a Mountie, a legend.

You're going to shoot a Mountie?

They'll hunt you to the ends of the earth.

Somebody shot him and you came to Chicago...

on the trail of some dentist.

And that's where we met.

Look, here's Nanook of the North.

Constable Fraser. Royal Canadian Mounted Police.

No kiddin'.

You got a dog?

He's in quarantine.

I'm looking for an officer assigned to this case number.

Oh yeah,

you're gonna like this fellow.

His name?

You can't miss him. Just look for Armani.

Can you read that? Does the label not say Armani?

'Course it's original merchandise.

A friend of mine just sorta found a truckload...

sitting on the side of the road.

Isn't this kind of a strange place to do business?

Hey, at least in here you know...

who you're dealing with, right?

Excuse me.

I'm looking for a Detective Armani?

Come on. You mean me?

Guard!

[Police Personnel Only]

Okay, who let the Mountie in the holdin' cell?

I'm sorry, I believe the unfortunate confusion...

with an unfamiliar idiotic trade name.

The confusion was,

was down here you don't bust in on some guy...

when he's about to take down the biggest operator...

in the garment district for buying stolen merchandise.

Oh, so you were attempting to sell him...

a truckload of illegally obtained men's clothing?

That's right.

Isn't that entrapment?

What do you want from me?

I was told...

that you're in charge of this case.

Ah yes,

the dead Mountie thing, like I couldn't have guessed.

Look, I've got your list of names in my basket here.

The moment I get a chance I'm gonna go to the computer,

pick up the phone and call you with the information...

so you can go get your Boy Scout points.

Now, is there anything else?

Yes.

The dead Mountie was my father.

And I would appreciate it if you'd check the names...

while there's still a chance of catching the man who killed him.

Oh and by the way,

he's not in the garment business.

What?

Your man, in the cell.

He had a hole in his shoe.

I'm not familiar with your city...

but I would assume that a big garment buyer...

wouldn't be caught dead.. with a hole in his shoe,

so,

like you,

he is pretending... to be someone he's not.

(Pilot)

And then we, um,

...bonded.

Bonded. We bonded?

Yeah, you can say that.

(Pilot)

Hey, what's up?

It's you!

I didn't recognize you standing there like that.

Okay,

I acted like a jerk.

I didn't realize it was your father.

I should have checked into it earlier.

I'm sorry.

Anyway you know you were right about...

the Goomba in the cell. Now I dig around...

and I find that this guy is internal affairs...

trying to nail my butt for illegal entrapment.

Can you believe that?

This guy's trying to entrap me into entrapping him.

Cops.

In any case I figure I owed you one so um,

here it is.

Thanks.

You're kidding, right?

This is your job? This is, like, your real job?

Do you believe it?

This is his job.

They actually pay people to do this in Canada.

Sorry.

(Pilot)

Now, you're sure you don't remember anything?

No.

You don't remember one thing.

Anything that happened that ...

anything you saw just before the accident?

What accident?

It was a jewelry heist.

A man was taken hostage by three women.

They threw him in a van.

The van sped away,

you jumped onto the van...

and as you were leaning back...

- ...to get the license you ... - Hang on, hang on, hang on.

I jumped onto a moving van?

Yeah, it's something you do all the time.

(Pilot)

What am I, stupid?

No, you're a hero.

Ah?!

(Pizza and Promises)

- My car! They got my car! - And since I met you,

you've ridden just about anything that moves.

Please stop immediately,

this is not your automobile.

Would you consider discussing this over coffee?

You're rather seriously crazy!

Oh, dear.

Sorry.

Oh!

You think maybe you got me...

mixed up with someone else maybe?

Alright, look Fraser,

we've got to get you back to normal.

Here, put this on.

Ooo, that's bright.

Yeah but you look good in it.

.... really bright.

Stop, don't shoot me, just let me go.

- I won't tell anyone, honest. - Be quiet; get out!

- Hurry! - Moving quickly, quickly, come on!

I don't know. What the hell is going on here?

Please, please maybe we can work something out.

- What the hell's going on? - You can't... Be still.

Wait, wait, I don't want a blindfold.

- I don't want a blindfold. - Be still!

Hey, hey wait a minute. That ring. That ring.

I recognize that ring!

That ring belongs to my wife.

Sheila? Karen? Rhonda? Darlene?

Hello, Clifford.

I'm a dead man.

Fraser?!?!

What?

You didn't hold the door open for this woman!

So?

You always hold the door for women.

(Pilot)

It only takes an extra second to be courteous. After you ma'am.

Ho, after you, sir.

Are we gonna get on or what?

Just like you help old ladies across the street,

you let people in front of you in line.

After you, ma'am.

After you.

After you, ma'am.

After you, sir.

After you.

Will you get in the truck?

- Just get in there, okay? - Ah!

Sorry, Ray.

(Chicago Holiday)

After you.

Hello everyone, how are you?

That's what you do.

- Why? - Because you're polite.

Just a moment.

Pardon me.

Is there a pay phone? (Dief's Day Off)

Down there.

Thank you kindly.

Sorry.

????

Thank you very much, Elaine.

Thank you kindly.

Well, thank you kindly, ma'am.

Thank you kindly, Elaine.

Ah, thank you kindly.

Thank you kindly, Leftenant.

Thank you kindly, Elaine.

(Pilot)

Excuse me,

can I have your attention, please?

Thank you.

Anyone carrying illegal weapons...

if you would place them on the bar ...

You are under arrest.

Alright.

You realize I'm going to have to confiscate that?

Come on Mack, no one's that polite! Ha-ha-ha.

You are!

And my name's not Mack. It's Ray.

Did you get anything on that plate?

- One letter even? - Nope. Nothing.

Do you remember this car?

Can't say as I do. No.

Beauty like this is one in a million.

(The Man Who Knew Too Little)

This is a 1971, mint condition Buick Riviera.

You know Ray, you really don't have to do this.

I'm sure I can find someone to loan me a car.

How many people have we asked?

Well, uh, basically everyone I know.

It does seem curious that they all decided...

to leave town at exactly the same time.

Are-are you aware that this particular gas tank...

in this particular make of car explodes on impact?

You wanna ride in the trunk?

Ray, you know, I appreciate this offer, I really do...

but you have some kind of...

special bond with this vehicle.

I'm not saying I understand it but I do respect it.

Shut up before I change my mind.

It's irreplaceable.

And thanks to you it got blown up.

(The Man Who Knew Too Little)

Right now would be quite a good time.

Twice!

Ray? It's Elaine.

I've got bad news. Nothing on the van.

I was afraid of that.

I thought you'd want to know...

Welsh's temperature is rising by the minute.

How you doing with Benton?

Great. Making a lot of progress.

- Can I ask you something? - Yeah.

What the hell kind of name is "Benton" anyway?

Ah... it's gonna be a lot harder than I thought.

Ray, no news on the van. Hi, Benton.

New boyfriend, Elaine?

No, it's for Lieutenant Welsh.

Vecchio.

How you doing on that jewelry heist?

Fraser got a good look at the license plate, sir.

Great. What are you waiting for we'll run it.

Ah, there's a problem.

He uh, fell off of the van and lost his memory.

You've forgotten it?

Complete blank.

Benny, why don't you look around...

and see if anything looks familiar.

No.

- Is this legit? - Ah yes, it is.

Excuse us for a second.

Vecchio, we got a hostage out there.

You know, sir, if he gets his memory back...

we can close this case.

Why don't we leave medicine to the doctors, okay.

Let's just do some solid police work.

Don't got the time to play, this is your life.

Yes, sir.

What did he say?

That uh, he's happy I'm helping you get your memory back.

Hmmm.

Ma'am, we assure you...

we'll do everything within our power...

to [help you] get your husband back.

Oh, Clifford!

I'm sorry, ma'am. We'll keep you informed.

[Sob...]

[Sob...]

[Sob.....giggle!]

Ow!

God, give me some warning, will you?

Okay. Do it slower this time.

Okay, okay, never mind, never mind that's ...

Hey, Cliffie. We all did it for you.

Plucking, waxing, preening ...

Didn't anyone ever tell you...

that it was wrong to cheat on your wife?

Ow!

And to be cheating on her with the three women...

who work out at the same club is just stupid.

You lied to us, Cliffie.

- You made fools of us. - Ow!

Look,

wha-what do you guys want?

What I want... is to kill you.

Ow!

Hello there.

We meet again.

Hi.

What's the matter?

Well, I mean, that... that woman just a...

you know, pppffftt.

Oh, it happens all the time.

- Really? - Oh, yeah.

Thanks, Elaine.

You want me to... call you at home?

My case, Elaine. Me. Detective Vecchio, police officer,

you talk directly to me. Okay?

Fraser should probably have the number just in case.

Oh, uh, ahem, I'm afraid I don't have a ...

He uses smoke signals. We'll call in...

Willie... come on mush. (Free Willie)

I mean, call me old fashioned but...

I think there's nothing as attractive...

as a man with baby formula on his sleeve.

Oh, please.

Oh, could you, uh, would you mind?

(A cop, A Mountie and A Baby)

Excuse me.

I'd like to take a test drive?

Yes, ma'am, right this way.

Uh, no. With him.

Oh, certainly.

Ahh... which car?

All of them.

(Pizzas and Promises)

Ah, would you ah ...

Anytime!

(Chicago Holiday)

May I help you?

Yes. I'm-I'm looking for a woman...

A particular woman.

Her name is Miss Burns.

Would you happen to know if she's here?

I haven't any idea. I don't work here.

Then how could you possibly help me?

(An Invitation to romance)

Need a lift?

Oh, yes, thank you.

Not you.

Which way you going?

Well, we're traveling together, ma'am.

Ditch him.

I'll go without him.

Not likely.

Too bad.

You ever get to Miami.. just ask for Rhonda.

(The Man Who Knew Too Little)

As a matter of fact,

even my own sister has eyes for you.

(They Eat Horses...)

Oh, sorry. I didn't know you were in here.

Didn't know, she's been standing in the doorway...

timing it so you'd be undressed.

You are such a liar!

I am naked in here. Does that mean anything to anybody?

- Shut up! - Who cares?

Here. You can use my towels.

Well, thank you but I'm afraid I'm not having a shower.

Oh, don't be silly, it's really no trouble.

And don't use all the hot water.

- I'll wait for mine. - Yeah, by the key hole.

You know, I've really had enough of your mouth.

Can you read me?

Loud and clear.

Oh um,

once again, I'm terribly sorry about the confusion.

I-I thought that you understood my intention.

Don't worry. Really I've forgotten all about it.

(Pizza & Promises)

Let me ask you something.

If a guy asks if you're busy tonight,

he's asking you out, right?

- ...Yeah, I'd think so. - Yeah, so would I.

You seen the salesman?

When my sister wants something,

she makes no bones about it.

Don't be afraid.

(The Deal)

(Heaven And Earth)

You slept with my sister?

Did she say that?

No, she did not say that.

She is my sister,

I do not discuss sex with my sister.

So, she didn't say...

No.

Oh well, very well,

forget that I mentioned it.

Hey, Fraser!

Really? With your sister.

And you were okay with this?

Sure.

- Did you sleep with him? - Oh, God.

Why? Why? Would it matter to you if I did?

Yes, it would,

you're my sister.

I care about you.

(Heaven And Earth)

Stupid, right?

I mean, if I want anybody to sleep with my sister...

and I'm not encouraging this...

I'd want it to be you.

That's very generous of you, Ray.

(Heaven And Earth)

Hey,

what if I don't get my memory back?

You'll get your memory back.

But what if I don't?

Look, you'll get your memory back, all right,

just trust me on this.

- Do I trust people? - Implicitly.

Good.

Okay, here we are.

Home sweet home.

Ring any bells?

Not any big ones.

I live like this?

Am I being punished?

Yo! I found a key.

I'll be right up, sir.

- Ray, Ray, Ray. - What?

- Is my lanyard straight? - He's a slum lord!

Up here, on the terrace level...

is where you get your great view.

'Course it costs a little extra but it's worth every penny.

Is there a terrace?

No.

Would you like to see my references now?

References?

It's like a rap sheet.

No, that's okay.

This is the place.

The furniture, appliances...

and all of this great stuff is included.

Utilities are extra.

On a good day, you can see Canada just across the lake.

Canada is four hundred and eighty miles due North.

You have to really squint. (Free Willie)

It's okay. It's Diefenbaker, your wolf.

I own a wolf? [Dief : Barking]

Hey!

Hey, that's my car!

Ray. Stop Diefenbaker! Stop him!

Hey! Stop!

- Halt! - Stop him!

Unmush! unmush!

Where's your car!

Lot B.

You ought to get that dog a hearing aid.

It's my mistake.

I never shoulda sent him.

He'll come back.

No, he won't.

He won't stop until he catches it.

And if they don't stop?

He'll die trying. (Pizza & Promises)

Am I allowed to have a wolf in Chicago?

Not normally but I got you a permit...

and you'd think you'd show a little appreciation.

Well, are you coming?

You know ya-ya let a wolf save your life...

and they make you pay and pay and pay.

That's why I don't own a wolf. (Chinatown)

He's very friendly.

Yeah, he's your best friend...

as long as you have something covered in chocolate.

Don't even think about it, okay?

Don't even think about it, all right?

That's all.

Just do what you gotta do...

so I can get out of here, okay?

You know why you can't go, don't you?

It's all that sugar.

Remember that next time you try to eat something of mine.

This is what happens to bad wolves.

Come on, think results here. Go, will you? (They Eat Horses...)

Would you mind dropping by my place and checking on Dief?

He's been in the apartment all day.

Oh, great. I can't wait to see what I'll find.

Thanks, Ray. (They Eat Horses)

That's your dad's diary.

My father.

Wait a minute. Something's coming back.

I remember we were in a car.

What are you reading?

My fathers journals.

I'm just going over old cases...

to see if there's anything similar.

Is there?

Not that I've found.

I'm gonna go to the gas station, I'll be right back.

That Sam's case.. was nothing like this.

No, I know but what I can't seem to find is ...

Hello, son.

Hello, Dad.

How are you?

I'm dead, son.

Other than that do you mean?

No, that's what I was asking.

Oh, that's good.

Never be ashamed to ask a stupid question, son.

I taught you that, didn't I?

Not specifically, no.

Well, no time like the present.

So fill me in on the case.

Well, in a nut shell:

There was a bank robbery today...

now we've identified the perpetrators but the wheelman,

that's the driver in Chicago parlance...

double crossed his partners...

now what we can't seem to figure...

is there any insanity in our family?

No, not that I'm aware of.

Good.

Well, there was your Uncle Tiberius...

who died wrapped in cabbage leaves...

but we assumed that was a freak accident.

Go on, go on...

(Gift of the Wheelman)

He was in the back seat.

We were on a stakeout.

What?

Uh, ... it's just that I never met your dad.

He's been dead going on two years.

Anything happen?

In what sense?

(Gift of the Wheelman)

Oh.

Come on,

You need a change of scenery.

Rhonda, Rhonda, Rhonda.

Let me talk to you for a second.

Please. Rhonda. Please, please, please.

What?

Listen, I'm sorry. Listen, just for a second, okay?

I know I don't deserve this...

but please, just listen to me for one second, okay?

Yeah.

Look, .. I'm sorry, okay?

I know I've been a real jerk. I apologies.

I love you.

You know what I did today?

I bought the tickets.

What tickets?

To Nassau.

One was tickets to Nassau, Rhonda.

The whole new life like we always kept talking about.

Remember?

I got 'em sitting there in the safe in the office.

I was gonna call you today and tell you to pack.

I mean this is ridiculous.

Don't do this, Cliff.

Rhonda, I'm telling you.

Fifteen million eight hundred, thirty-nine thousand...

seven hundred and twenty-three dollars...

and twenty-five cents. ($15.839.723)

What's that?

That's all the money I had stashed in that secret account.

I've been doing a little bit of creative accounting.

Oh.

Rhonda, I know it doesn't seem like it...

but I love you more than anybody else.

I'm sorry I been acting like this...

but listen, we could start...

a brand new life with that kinda cash.

Just you and me.

Okay.

If I've been lying to you, Rhonda...

- ...may God strike me dead! - Uh-uh, Clifford.

God's gonna have to stand in line.

Now you be a good boy uh,

and give me that account number.

No.

Let's take him to the sauna, girls.

Come on Sheila, come on!

Hey, come on guys, that's not...

Come on, what are you guys doing?

Please. This is insane.

Darlene. Oh, Darlene, let me out of here, okay?

- It's hot in here. - It's too hot.

I can't stand this. I'm gonna die, okay?

I'm gonna die. I swear to God, I'm gonna die.

You must be dying of thirst. Mmm?

Please, just a little bit of water, okay?

Sure Cliffie,

You just give me your account number...

and you can take a long cool drink.

The account number?

I-I... I-I can't remember it. Okay?

It's... It's-It's in the office somewhere.

I gotta go back to the office to get it.

Oh, well.

What are you doin'?

Come on, Darlene.

I'm gonna die in here. For God's sake I'm gonna die.

Darlene. All we've been through - huh?

- Call me when you remember. - Wait, wait, Darlene.

Darlene, wait a minute, wait a minute. Wait a minute!

This is my desk?

Oh boy, I must make a lot of mistakes.

You really don't know who I am?

No.

Inspector Meg Thatcher.

I'm your commanding officer.

It's nice to meet you.

Meg.

Uh, ma'am.

Maybe you can remind him of something that you two shared.

A case, some special training. You know, Mountie stuff.

- Eggs. - Eggs.

No, please, not the eggs.

Eggs.

Can you throw?

1.3 ERA over 30 games.

That's good.

Hit the red button.

What's goin' on?

Way to go, Mountie!

Not so fast, pal.

Unless you wanna play chicken.

Ray!

Evening, Benny. Inspector.

Well, it's very good of you to come. May I?

Ah, no problem.

(We are the Eggmen)

Eggs.

Anything else?

Excuse me.

Fraser, you don't remember anything about...

About?

You know.

I do?

You must.

I give up.

What is the perfume you're wearing?

I'm not wearing anything, Fraser,

I hate perfume.

Ah.

(Queen's Horses)

I don't.

Of course.

Right.

Carry on, gentlemen.

Keep me apprised.

Ray, this woman, ahh...

are she and I .... Rrrrrr?

She hates you.

Ah.

- That's too bad. - Yeah.

Are you sure.. that the inspector and I never...

Absolutely sure.

And you just gave me a great idea.

Well?

If this doesn't do it, nothing will.

Do you remember her?

Her?

No no, not her. Victoria.

This is where you saw her.

('Possession' Performed by Sarah McLachlan)

Listen as the wind blows

from across the great divide

Voices trapped in yearning,

Hi.

Hi.

It was you. I thought I saw you standing...

in the middle of the road. I...

I-I wasn't sure if I was seeing...

No, that-that was me. I was uh...

standing in the middle of the road.

I-I never thought I'd see you again.

Neither did I.

Excuse me.

Where were you um...

Prison.

...going.

Where were you going?

Oh - I - it doesn't matter.

Do you still want this to go?

No.

(Victoria's Secret)

Hey, Benny? You okay?

Morning, Ray.

Hey, the Consulate said you never showed up.

So I figured you'd have to be pretty sick. Are you all right?

Yeah, I'm fine.

So you're not sick.

No. I'm fine.

But you didn't go to work.

- Musta slept in. - Huh.

Are you in some kinda trouble?

No. no, no, no.

No, I just I uh... ahem...

I have a friend visiting and I... I'm...

Oh.

What kind of friend?

A guy friend? A girl friend?

Oh, no...

You got a woman in there?

Yes.

Way to go man. Way to go.

You gotta an actual woman. You.

- Thanks for dropping by, Ray. - Wow!

Way to go.

Gotta woman in there.

(Victoria's Secret)

Fraser!

Come with me!

She's got a gun!

(Victoria's Secret)

You shot me?

Well, I didn't mean to.

Are you definitely sure that we're friends?

Yes, we're friends.

I've done more for you than anybody.

Heeeeeellllllp!

It would appear to be a soundproof room.

You got a better plan.

Yes. Relax.

That's a plan?

The more you struggle Ray, the tighter it becomes.

All you have to do is relax.. completely.

Ow!

Dislocate your shoulder...

and pull your arm out of the sleeve.

Yeah or you come up me up.

[Both] Ow!

Well, yeah, that would work too.

(A Hawk And A Handsaw)

Bolted shut.

Archimedes said:

"Give me a fulcrum and a lever long enough...

and I can move the world."

Well, why do I always have to be the fulcrum?

You know something,

it's probably better that...

there are somethings I don't remember.

Yeah, you're probably right.

Ray...

What?

You keep saying that we're friends.

What are you asking me, Benny?

Why are we friends?

You know.

Well, no. That's just it. I don't.

I mean that from everything you've told me I'm I'm ...

Annoying.

Yes. Exactly.

So you see, the problem is,

now that I have the bonds in my hands,

I'm honor bound not.. to give them to you.

Give her the bonds, Fraser.

I can't do that, Ray.

You got three seconds and I shoot him!

One...

I'm sorry, Ray.

What do you mean sorry?

Two...

Give her the damn bonds!

I can't do it.

I'm walking out of here with them.

That's it. He's dead!

Sorry to hear that.

Fraser!

Three!

Oh.

Argh!

She shot my hat, Ray!

She shot you in the hat?

I can feel air coming in through the hole.

She shot you in the hat, all right.

How does it look?

Doesn't look good.

We'll have to go home and get my other one.

We can do that, Fraser.

Thanks, Ray.

(Free Willie)

Oh, it's...

you know guys aren't any good at talking about this.

Oh, they aren't?

No.

No. Right. Yeah, yeah.

You're testing the wrong person, Billy Bob.

Dead?

I hate men.

No. Just disappointed.

What is wrong with you?

Pardon me?

What the hell is wrong with you?

She almost killed you in there.

Didn't you think she'd flatten you here?

Oh, I knew she was prepared to kill me.

Well, then why did you stand there?

Well, I heard you coming.

I had to keep her attention fixed on me long enough...

so that's you would be able intervene.

But what if I didn't.

Well, I knew you would take the car parked next to hers...

and the Plymouth accelerates two seconds faster...

over the quarter mile than the Cadillac.

I took the Chevy.

Oh...

Oh, well.

You know you really should tell me next time.

Tell you what?

Well, I mean if you're gonna change a plan like that.

I was standing in front of a car, Ray.

Plan? Plan? What plan?

You mean to tell me there were two cars to choose from, alright.

You're telling me I took the wrong car?

No apologies necessary.

It's already forgotten.

(Pizzas And Promises)

I mean, it's just one of those special cases...

where alone we're incomplete...

but together we're better than we are separately,

you know what I mean?

One...

Ahhhhh!

Okay, stop the car, smart guy!

- Stop the car! - I can't! I can't! My legs cramped up!

Stop the car, you slime-sucking toad!

You better undo these things.

You can go to hell!

Fraser!

Ow-ow-ow! My leg, ow!

(The man who knew too little)

Yes.

Yes, I do, I do.

It's like - it's like that time we were hanging onto that van...

by our fingernails and I was trying to open the door ...

I don't remember that.

Sure you do,

sure you do.

I leaned down to-to try and read the license plate...

and I ah...

- Fell off! - Yes.

- Benny, you remember it!? - Yes.

What was the license plate number?

It was partially obscured by mud,

in fact the whole general deterioration ...

- Fraser! - What?

What was the license plate number?

Oh, the license plate number...

RCW 139.

RCW 139. Are you sure?

- Yes, of course I'm sure. - Oh, Benny, I could just kiss you!

- I thought we were just friends, Ray. - Oh, we are.

Elaine!

Alright, I'll give it to you.

Alright, just open up, okay?

Did you hear something?

I don't think so.

I'll go check.

Hello?

Hmmm.

I think he's done.

213 859 31 ....

Perfect.

Well, Clifford darling,

I'm afraid this here is where we part company.

Oh, my god.

Come on, Sheila, you're not serious.

Come on. Sheila, you can't really kill me.

Why shouldn't I?

You're a cheater, Clifford.

A cheater and a crook.

Look Sheila. Come on, we had good times, don't we?

Alright ladies, drop the gun.

Thank God.

Drop the gun.

Alright.

Now, we're going down town...

and we're gonna get to the bottom of this,

you understand?

Absolutely, officer.

We'd be happy to cooperate. We'll tell you everything...

and about Nassau.

Nassau? What about Nassau?

Uh, listen uh. This was just a surprise.

A surprise?

Yeah uh for my birthday.

Uh, this is my wife Sheila and these are her friends...

and they came down to the store...

and they wanted to surprise me.

- And they got me and uh... - And they tied you up.

Exactly.

For my birthday. What a surprise.

Whoo-whoopee?

Is this your story too?

Absolutely.

Go ahead and fire the gun.

Hmmm.

You know Ray,

I think there's more to this than meets the eye.

The bonds on Mr. Clifford's hands are tied for security...

not as if they'd been playing a game.

Although, you know, it does remind me of an Inuit ceremony...

I once witnessed in which the bridegroom was tied to the bride...

by means of a walrus pelt...

You know, Benny,

I'm really glad you're back but uh...

would you mind shutting up?

No. Not at all.

Alright, everybody, hands over your heads.

You too, Cliffie.

- Ray. - Huh.

Oh.

Just let me get some pants, alright.

Just let me get some pants on.

Great Scott! Ray, look at my uniform!

Yeah, I was wondering when you'd notice that.

So listen, Fraser.

Yes?

When you were not back,

- ...there was some words ... said. - Don't worry, Ray.

I remember very little.

Alright. Good.

So you wanna tell me more about that Eskimo - walrus pelt thing?

Ah, it's Inuit, actually.

The tribe I was speaking of...

they believe that two people who've been bound together...

will be more effective.

Fraser.

- I should stop talking? - Yes.

By : Reza Fa. Many thanks to [duesouth.blogfa.com] for script. Version : 2

I said drop it!

We liked it.

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