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1
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He's saying, I'm gonna crack your skulls
2
00:00:05,027 --> 00:00:07,600
if you don't give me your artichokes.
[Bleep] yeah.
3
00:00:07,630 --> 00:00:10,068
We're gonna scoop Hollandaise
tonight, son.
4
00:00:10,098 --> 00:00:12,132
Julia Child is like,
what is all this food?
5
00:00:12,134 --> 00:00:14,529
This croissants, these...
you know what I mean?
6
00:00:14,559 --> 00:00:16,234
Like, these espressos
and stuff like that.
7
00:00:16,264 --> 00:00:17,294
She's like, the chicken.
8
00:00:17,324 --> 00:00:19,060
- (Belches)
- I keep... I'm so sorry.
9
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I'm so embarrassed I keep burping.
10
00:00:20,387 --> 00:00:22,839
And he's like, holy shit, guys, run!
11
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He saw this wave of molasses.
12
00:00:25,539 --> 00:00:27,731
(Laughs)
13
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You're so embarrassed.
You're so embarrassed.
14
00:00:30,803 --> 00:00:33,837
(Patriotic music)
15
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? ?
16
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- Food's personal.
- Very.
17
00:00:44,951 --> 00:00:47,427
It's alarming how people
kind of, like, feel
18
00:00:47,457 --> 00:00:49,558
like they need to, like, educate you.
19
00:00:49,588 --> 00:00:50,821
- Mm-hmm.
- About what you're doing.
20
00:00:50,851 --> 00:00:53,729
Makes you want to, like,
spitefully just eat junk.
21
00:00:53,759 --> 00:00:55,626
- Yeah.
- Just to be like, [bleep] you.
22
00:00:55,628 --> 00:00:57,594
And then when you watch "Survivor"
23
00:00:57,596 --> 00:00:59,863
and they're eating, like,
the last scoop of rice
24
00:00:59,893 --> 00:01:03,022
and they're just like, should
we eat this bug for the protein?
25
00:01:03,052 --> 00:01:04,351
And you're just like, ha ha ha,
26
00:01:04,353 --> 00:01:07,261
I have, like, seven entrees
that I ordered out.
27
00:01:07,291 --> 00:01:08,955
- Oh, hello.
- Oh, hello.
28
00:01:08,957 --> 00:01:11,024
(Laughs)
29
00:01:11,026 --> 00:01:13,464
(Hums)
30
00:01:13,526 --> 00:01:14,695
Hello.
31
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I'm Tess Lynch and today,
32
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we are gonna talk about
the artichoke wars.
33
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Our story begins in New York City, 1935.
34
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So, there had been one group
35
00:01:27,554 --> 00:01:29,393
that have been diehard fans
of the artichoke
36
00:01:29,395 --> 00:01:32,167
and that is the Italian immigrants.
37
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They're bananas over this stuff.
38
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The Italians are like,
39
00:01:34,562 --> 00:01:36,200
we're ride or die for these artichokes.
40
00:01:36,202 --> 00:01:37,606
These artichokes are fantastic.
41
00:01:37,636 --> 00:01:39,469
You can do it... butter cars
42
00:01:39,471 --> 00:01:41,315
that just drive butter into your mouth,
43
00:01:41,345 --> 00:01:43,376
but it was also not great.
44
00:01:43,406 --> 00:01:44,838
Ciro Terranova...
45
00:01:44,868 --> 00:01:46,376
Ciro or Churro?
46
00:01:46,378 --> 00:01:49,167
It's Ciro but you could... you
know, friends call him Churro.
47
00:01:49,197 --> 00:01:51,435
Well, only when he's
sprinkled with powdered sugar.
48
00:01:51,465 --> 00:01:53,366
I guess really it's sugar and cinnamon.
49
00:01:53,368 --> 00:01:55,303
It's like, to be, you know, authentic.
50
00:01:55,333 --> 00:01:58,605
So Ciro Terranova is the underboss
51
00:01:58,607 --> 00:01:59,907
of the Morello crime family.
52
00:01:59,909 --> 00:02:02,259
He was kind of dabbling in everything.
53
00:02:02,289 --> 00:02:04,444
I mean, like, there were
plenty of murders.
54
00:02:04,446 --> 00:02:05,879
- I'll tell you that.
- Mm.
55
00:02:05,881 --> 00:02:07,047
And there was plenty of corruption
56
00:02:07,077 --> 00:02:08,549
and there was racketeering.
57
00:02:08,551 --> 00:02:12,458
Like, you know, his...
his finger was in every pie,
58
00:02:12,488 --> 00:02:13,887
but the end of prohibition
59
00:02:13,889 --> 00:02:16,623
is really costing the Mafia
like, a ton of money.
60
00:02:16,775 --> 00:02:18,141
Booze is legal again.
61
00:02:18,143 --> 00:02:20,157
It's like, ooh, what are we gonna do?
62
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So Ciro's like, I don't know.
63
00:02:22,081 --> 00:02:24,681
Like, I could just
grab all these artichokes
64
00:02:24,683 --> 00:02:26,083
and sell 'em.
65
00:02:26,085 --> 00:02:29,219
So he's going to the farmers
Northern California.
66
00:02:29,221 --> 00:02:30,554
He's threatening them.
67
00:02:30,556 --> 00:02:33,390
He's saying, I'm gonna crack your skulls
68
00:02:33,392 --> 00:02:35,426
if you don't give me your artichokes.
69
00:02:35,428 --> 00:02:37,394
They're saying whoa, whoa buddy.
70
00:02:37,396 --> 00:02:39,823
Best step off 'cause you're
terrifying as [bleep].
71
00:02:39,853 --> 00:02:42,199
And he has taken these artichokes
72
00:02:42,201 --> 00:02:43,901
and he has a complete monopoly.
73
00:02:43,903 --> 00:02:45,969
He's bullying the vendors
in New York City
74
00:02:45,971 --> 00:02:47,905
and he's bullying the customers
75
00:02:47,907 --> 00:02:50,541
by driving the prices through the roof.
76
00:02:50,543 --> 00:02:52,976
Luckily mayor Fiorello La Guardia,
77
00:02:52,978 --> 00:02:54,244
The Little Flower...
78
00:02:54,246 --> 00:02:55,267
Why The Little Flower?
79
00:02:55,297 --> 00:02:56,630
Why did he have that name?
80
00:02:56,632 --> 00:02:59,600
He's really small
and Fiorello means flower.
81
00:02:59,602 --> 00:03:00,919
- Little Flower.
- Makes sense.
82
00:03:00,949 --> 00:03:03,404
And, like, La Guardia is Italian,
83
00:03:03,406 --> 00:03:07,908
so he... in his genetic makeup
loves the artichoke.
84
00:03:07,910 --> 00:03:08,976
I need to do something.
85
00:03:08,978 --> 00:03:09,943
I need to do something.
86
00:03:09,945 --> 00:03:12,212
What am I gonna do?
87
00:03:12,214 --> 00:03:14,381
What he does is, he gets his advisors
88
00:03:14,383 --> 00:03:16,216
and he's like, we need to hatch a plan.
89
00:03:16,218 --> 00:03:17,451
It has to be a secret plan
90
00:03:17,453 --> 00:03:19,019
and it has to be a flashy plan
91
00:03:19,021 --> 00:03:20,487
because we're dealing with the mob here
92
00:03:20,489 --> 00:03:23,490
and I'm just, like,
a little flower of a man.
93
00:03:23,492 --> 00:03:24,758
I like a flashy plan.
94
00:03:24,760 --> 00:03:26,881
Yeah, well, you got
to have a flashy plan,
95
00:03:26,911 --> 00:03:29,463
otherwise it's not... no, it might work
96
00:03:29,465 --> 00:03:30,898
if it's not flashy,
97
00:03:30,900 --> 00:03:33,300
but what's the point if it's not flashy?
98
00:03:33,302 --> 00:03:34,701
'Cause you're not gonna
go down in history
99
00:03:34,703 --> 00:03:36,586
if don't have a flashy plan.
100
00:03:37,072 --> 00:03:40,107
December 22, 1935,
101
00:03:40,109 --> 00:03:42,543
La Guardia enters
the Bronx Terminal Market.
102
00:03:42,545 --> 00:03:46,346
And he's got all his guys,
all his squad, with him.
103
00:03:46,348 --> 00:03:48,415
? All his squad, all his squad ?
104
00:03:48,417 --> 00:03:50,250
? For the artichoke, all his squad ?
105
00:03:50,252 --> 00:03:54,521
And he goes in and he's like,
okay, trumpet guy, pssht,
106
00:03:54,523 --> 00:03:56,713
you're gonna play your thing, go ahead.
107
00:03:56,743 --> 00:03:58,470
And the guy comes out
and it's just like...
108
00:03:58,500 --> 00:03:59,956
(Hums)
109
00:04:00,094 --> 00:04:01,951
And he's like, oh, it's out of tune.
110
00:04:01,981 --> 00:04:02,911
December in New York.
111
00:04:02,941 --> 00:04:04,198
Get the hell out of here.
112
00:04:04,200 --> 00:04:05,517
Warm up your trumpet. Time out.
113
00:04:05,547 --> 00:04:06,999
And the guy goes inside and he comes out
114
00:04:07,029 --> 00:04:07,857
and then he's like...
115
00:04:07,887 --> 00:04:10,020
(Hums)
116
00:04:10,022 --> 00:04:11,088
And it's great.
117
00:04:11,090 --> 00:04:12,489
La Guardia reads from the scroll
118
00:04:12,491 --> 00:04:14,625
and he's like, everybody.
119
00:04:14,885 --> 00:04:16,193
Listen.
120
00:04:16,195 --> 00:04:18,495
We ain't gonna have these
121
00:04:18,497 --> 00:04:21,765
punks, racketeers, or thugs
122
00:04:21,767 --> 00:04:26,637
taking our mother[bleep]
artichokes away from us.
123
00:04:26,639 --> 00:04:28,337
And everyone's like, [bleep] yeah,
124
00:04:28,367 --> 00:04:31,575
We're gonna scoop Hollandaise
tonight, son!
125
00:04:31,577 --> 00:04:33,243
And he's like, that's right.
126
00:04:33,245 --> 00:04:36,480
You cannot sell or possess any artichokes
127
00:04:36,482 --> 00:04:39,383
until we legitimize this sale.
128
00:04:39,385 --> 00:04:43,320
Fiorello La Guardia
goes back to his house,
129
00:04:43,322 --> 00:04:46,257
has a cookie, glass of milk, but then,
130
00:04:46,287 --> 00:04:50,227
all of the five biggest
California artichoke vendors,
131
00:04:50,229 --> 00:04:53,864
they're like, we are not
selling any... this is terrible.
132
00:04:53,866 --> 00:04:55,165
This is even worse
than dealing with the mob guy.
133
00:04:55,167 --> 00:04:56,467
We have to reach an agreement.
134
00:04:56,469 --> 00:04:58,619
They... they basically sit down
with La Guardia
135
00:04:58,649 --> 00:05:00,904
and they're like, look,
we're gonna sit down
136
00:05:00,906 --> 00:05:02,172
and make a deal
137
00:05:02,174 --> 00:05:05,268
but you've got to protect us
from this [bleep] mob.
138
00:05:05,298 --> 00:05:08,078
And La Guardia's like, you know what?
139
00:05:08,080 --> 00:05:09,346
Okay.
140
00:05:09,348 --> 00:05:11,215
I can [bleep] protect you from the mob.
141
00:05:11,217 --> 00:05:13,717
Okay, so several hours pass.
142
00:05:13,719 --> 00:05:16,653
Blah blah blah blah blah,
blah blah blah blah blah,
143
00:05:16,655 --> 00:05:17,988
no no no, yes yes yes,
144
00:05:17,990 --> 00:05:19,990
then they're like, okay.
145
00:05:19,992 --> 00:05:21,158
Sign the agreement.
146
00:05:21,188 --> 00:05:22,192
? Ba ba ba ?
147
00:05:22,194 --> 00:05:23,994
There it is.
148
00:05:23,996 --> 00:05:26,977
December 29, the ban is lifted.
149
00:05:27,007 --> 00:05:28,632
Artichokes are back on the menu.
150
00:05:28,634 --> 00:05:30,100
They've gotten all this publicity
151
00:05:30,102 --> 00:05:32,469
so even non-Italians
152
00:05:32,471 --> 00:05:35,839
who were very disdainful
of artichokes before
153
00:05:35,841 --> 00:05:37,875
are like, we're gonna give those a shot.
154
00:05:37,877 --> 00:05:39,510
I mean, these are like,
155
00:05:39,512 --> 00:05:42,946
everybody's going to such great
lengths about the artichokes.
156
00:05:42,948 --> 00:05:44,481
We'll try them. (Sniffs)
157
00:05:44,483 --> 00:05:48,052
Ciro Terranova has been dethroned
158
00:05:48,054 --> 00:05:49,453
as the artichoke king.
159
00:05:49,455 --> 00:05:51,322
He's arrested every time
he's in Manhattan
160
00:05:51,324 --> 00:05:53,920
for being a vagrant
'cause everyone's like,
161
00:05:53,950 --> 00:05:56,983
huh, artichoke king,
blah blah blah, loser.
162
00:05:57,013 --> 00:06:01,098
La Guardia, remembered as one
of the most beloved mayors
163
00:06:01,100 --> 00:06:02,866
in New York history,
164
00:06:02,868 --> 00:06:05,836
reportedly liked his artichokes
with mayonnaise.
165
00:06:05,838 --> 00:06:07,178
That's his one flaw.
166
00:06:07,208 --> 00:06:08,405
- Oh, God.
- Yeah.
167
00:06:08,407 --> 00:06:09,851
- Just made you throw up, didn't I?
- Mm-hmm.
168
00:06:09,881 --> 00:06:10,688
Yeah, I know.
169
00:06:10,718 --> 00:06:12,242
- Mm-hmm.
- That's my goal.
170
00:06:12,244 --> 00:06:16,180
Hon, artichoke's ready.
171
00:06:16,182 --> 00:06:17,181
(Laughs)
172
00:06:17,183 --> 00:06:19,516
This is actually really good.
173
00:06:19,518 --> 00:06:21,752
Well, it's not good.
174
00:06:21,754 --> 00:06:23,379
It's not good.
175
00:06:23,642 --> 00:06:24,860
This is terrible.
176
00:06:24,890 --> 00:06:26,100
(Laughs)
177
00:06:26,130 --> 00:06:29,400
= synced and corrected by Shahrazade =
... www.addic7ed.com ...
178
00:06:29,562 --> 00:06:31,240
You guys, I'm a little tips.
179
00:06:31,270 --> 00:06:32,782
Mm-hmm.
180
00:06:33,097 --> 00:06:36,325
Hello, I am Lyric Lewis.
181
00:06:36,355 --> 00:06:37,605
Wait. Let me take that again.
182
00:06:37,635 --> 00:06:38,579
Okay.
183
00:06:38,609 --> 00:06:39,573
Hello.
184
00:06:39,603 --> 00:06:40,903
No, okay.
185
00:06:40,933 --> 00:06:42,911
Hello, I'm Lyric Lewis
186
00:06:42,941 --> 00:06:46,839
and today we are talking
about Julia Child.
187
00:06:46,869 --> 00:06:48,969
- To Julia.
- To Julia.
188
00:06:49,447 --> 00:06:52,415
So, Julia, she had a very humdrum life.
189
00:06:52,417 --> 00:06:53,482
She's like, super tall.
190
00:06:53,484 --> 00:06:54,517
She's 6'3".
191
00:06:54,519 --> 00:06:56,077
She's like, dumb tall.
192
00:06:56,107 --> 00:06:59,894
Julia never ate anything
but canned or processed food,
193
00:06:59,924 --> 00:07:01,325
but then she's like,
you know what? [Bleep] this.
194
00:07:01,355 --> 00:07:02,719
She's like, I'm gonna be a spy.
195
00:07:03,745 --> 00:07:04,844
Ba-blam.
196
00:07:04,846 --> 00:07:07,279
So she applies to be a spy for the OSS,
197
00:07:07,281 --> 00:07:10,216
- which is the Office of...
- (Belches)
198
00:07:10,218 --> 00:07:11,396
Oh, God.
199
00:07:11,426 --> 00:07:15,093
Um, the Office of Strategic Services.
200
00:07:15,123 --> 00:07:17,624
The Office of Strategic Services
201
00:07:17,626 --> 00:07:20,898
in Washington, DC, which will
later become the CIA. Boom.
202
00:07:20,928 --> 00:07:22,645
So, one day her boss comes to her
203
00:07:22,647 --> 00:07:23,771
and her boss is like, yo,
204
00:07:23,801 --> 00:07:25,919
I need you to come up
with shark repellent
205
00:07:25,949 --> 00:07:27,666
for bombs underwater.
206
00:07:27,954 --> 00:07:30,051
But that was, like,
her fist glimpse into cooking
207
00:07:30,053 --> 00:07:31,673
and into, like, espionage work,
208
00:07:31,703 --> 00:07:34,006
so she gets a bowl,
she mixes up shark repellent.
209
00:07:34,008 --> 00:07:36,221
She's like, I'm gonna add glue,
stick some bombs,
210
00:07:36,251 --> 00:07:37,677
she's like,
I'm gonna add some gun powder.
211
00:07:37,679 --> 00:07:39,184
And she's like, I'm not gonna add blood
212
00:07:39,214 --> 00:07:40,546
because sharks will like blood.
213
00:07:40,548 --> 00:07:43,120
She adds stuff that's,
like, against blood.
214
00:07:43,150 --> 00:07:44,484
The sharks are like, I don't want to...
215
00:07:44,486 --> 00:07:46,374
- (Nibbles)
- I don't want to bite it.
216
00:07:46,404 --> 00:07:48,626
And Julia's like, cool cool
cool, tight tight tight.
217
00:07:48,656 --> 00:07:49,798
(Belches)
218
00:07:49,828 --> 00:07:51,001
Oh, excuse me.
219
00:07:51,031 --> 00:07:53,025
So... (pops tongue)
220
00:07:53,027 --> 00:07:55,502
Later comes 1944.
221
00:07:55,532 --> 00:07:57,377
She volunteers to go to Sri Lanka.
222
00:07:57,407 --> 00:07:58,898
Sri Lanka's like, hey girl, hey.
223
00:07:58,900 --> 00:08:00,483
And she's a secretary for this office
224
00:08:00,513 --> 00:08:02,368
where they're working
for American soldiers
225
00:08:02,370 --> 00:08:04,365
in guerilla warfare,
so she's like, doing that shit.
226
00:08:04,395 --> 00:08:05,410
So it's, like, kinda gritty
227
00:08:05,440 --> 00:08:07,236
but it's still, like, a secretary
228
00:08:07,266 --> 00:08:09,675
but she's like, yeah, what paperwork?
229
00:08:09,677 --> 00:08:12,311
She's 31 and she's ready for a man
230
00:08:12,313 --> 00:08:16,370
to get up in all 6...
6 feet, 3 inches of that.
231
00:08:16,400 --> 00:08:18,618
She's like, I'm ready to mingle.
232
00:08:18,620 --> 00:08:21,083
I'm ready for a penis in every position.
233
00:08:21,113 --> 00:08:23,227
Julia's like, super horny.
234
00:08:23,257 --> 00:08:24,784
- Hey now.
- Right?
235
00:08:25,193 --> 00:08:26,826
And she looks up and she sees Paul.
236
00:08:26,828 --> 00:08:29,195
She sees Paul. Paul is a vision to her.
237
00:08:29,225 --> 00:08:31,731
He's a tall, tall drink of water.
238
00:08:31,733 --> 00:08:33,400
Tall glass of milk.
239
00:08:33,430 --> 00:08:37,003
Tall glass of almond milk
if you're a vegan.
240
00:08:37,005 --> 00:08:40,907
Tall glass of soy milk
if you're a vegetarian.
241
00:08:40,909 --> 00:08:44,677
Tall glass of goat milk
if you don't like cows.
242
00:08:44,679 --> 00:08:45,791
(Snickers)
243
00:08:45,879 --> 00:08:47,814
And Julia's like, that is
a man and I got to get him.
244
00:08:48,466 --> 00:08:49,632
He's like a nerd.
245
00:08:49,662 --> 00:08:52,239
Paul's like, hey, everybody.
246
00:08:52,269 --> 00:08:53,802
Who wants to play Scrabble later?
247
00:08:53,804 --> 00:08:54,792
Ha ha ha!
248
00:08:54,854 --> 00:08:57,290
And Julia's like, you don't even know
249
00:08:57,292 --> 00:08:58,424
how sexy you are, Paul.
250
00:08:58,426 --> 00:09:00,560
I will drink your bathwater.
251
00:09:00,562 --> 00:09:04,430
Julia before Paul,
she only ate processed food,
252
00:09:04,432 --> 00:09:06,070
canned foods, creamed corn,
253
00:09:06,100 --> 00:09:07,967
everything out of a can
so Paul was like,
254
00:09:07,969 --> 00:09:12,399
your palate is so [bleep] basic
and I'm showing you a new life.
255
00:09:12,675 --> 00:09:15,508
So they ate all these
exotic foods together
256
00:09:15,510 --> 00:09:16,943
and Julia was like, [bleep] me,
257
00:09:16,945 --> 00:09:18,911
and Paul was like, yes, bitch,
where have you been?
258
00:09:18,913 --> 00:09:21,022
She was like, oh, my God,
this man is amazing.
259
00:09:21,052 --> 00:09:23,020
My palate is developing.
260
00:09:23,050 --> 00:09:24,433
I'm into him and she was feeling him
261
00:09:24,463 --> 00:09:27,270
and Paul was like, no, not yet.
262
00:09:27,272 --> 00:09:29,505
Because I'm feeling Jane Foster now.
263
00:09:29,507 --> 00:09:31,252
Jane is a [bleep] spy.
264
00:09:31,282 --> 00:09:32,809
Like, she's a spy.
265
00:09:32,811 --> 00:09:33,810
Do you hear me? She's a [bleep] spy.
266
00:09:33,812 --> 00:09:35,411
Jane is, like, out in the field.
267
00:09:35,441 --> 00:09:36,579
She's [bleep] shooting people.
268
00:09:36,581 --> 00:09:40,355
Paul, he liked Jane a lot
because she was sexy,
269
00:09:40,385 --> 00:09:43,198
and Julia was doing office work
so it's like,
270
00:09:43,228 --> 00:09:45,108
who wants the pencil pusher
271
00:09:45,138 --> 00:09:48,835
when you can get the maker
of the wood?
272
00:09:48,865 --> 00:09:52,644
'Cause I feel like Jane
was making wood, right?
273
00:09:52,939 --> 00:09:55,539
(Laughs)
274
00:09:55,752 --> 00:09:58,656
Jane was like,
no, you're mad corny to me.
275
00:09:58,686 --> 00:09:59,618
But we're friends.
276
00:09:59,620 --> 00:10:01,476
So they're hanging out and then Paul,
277
00:10:01,506 --> 00:10:03,160
he looks at Julia and he's like,
278
00:10:03,190 --> 00:10:07,694
Julia, you tall but you cute,
you know what I mean?
279
00:10:07,724 --> 00:10:09,796
So Julia was like, yes.
280
00:10:09,798 --> 00:10:11,319
Paul, I want to continue this.
281
00:10:11,349 --> 00:10:12,915
We need to take a road trip
282
00:10:12,917 --> 00:10:14,750
because that's how people
really get to know each other
283
00:10:14,752 --> 00:10:16,185
and know if they want to be together.
284
00:10:16,187 --> 00:10:19,083
And Paul was like, cool cool
cool, tight tight tight.
285
00:10:19,113 --> 00:10:21,016
So then at the end of the war,
they went back home.
286
00:10:21,046 --> 00:10:23,209
They pack her Buick full of clothing
287
00:10:23,211 --> 00:10:26,179
and then she's like, oh, I'm gonna pack
288
00:10:26,181 --> 00:10:28,981
a soup thermos
full of pre-mixed martinis.
289
00:10:28,983 --> 00:10:31,250
And a bottle of vodka because
this is back in the day
290
00:10:31,252 --> 00:10:33,386
when there was no open container laws,
291
00:10:33,388 --> 00:10:36,727
so they set off and Paul is like, yes!
292
00:10:36,757 --> 00:10:38,257
Julia is like, yes!
293
00:10:38,259 --> 00:10:40,073
The police on the road
I'm sure are like,
294
00:10:40,103 --> 00:10:41,828
yes, girl, go get your man!
295
00:10:41,830 --> 00:10:42,895
(Laughs)
296
00:10:42,897 --> 00:10:46,132
So they fell in love
and they got married.
297
00:10:46,508 --> 00:10:47,433
Him and Julia was like,
298
00:10:47,435 --> 00:10:48,668
okay, cool cool cool, tight tight tight,
299
00:10:48,670 --> 00:10:50,641
and then they get to go to France.
300
00:10:50,671 --> 00:10:52,004
So she goes to France and she's like,
301
00:10:52,006 --> 00:10:54,774
what is all this food,
this croissants, these...
302
00:10:54,776 --> 00:10:56,108
you know what I mean?
303
00:10:56,110 --> 00:10:57,215
Like, these espressos
and stuff like that.
304
00:10:57,245 --> 00:10:58,377
She's like, the chicken.
305
00:10:58,379 --> 00:11:00,418
And so she enrolls in Le Cordon Bleu
306
00:11:00,448 --> 00:11:01,781
of all places.
307
00:11:01,783 --> 00:11:03,649
And she's like, doing
0all these French foods
308
00:11:03,651 --> 00:11:05,156
and they come back to America,
309
00:11:05,186 --> 00:11:08,325
and this... this late...
this late in the game
310
00:11:08,355 --> 00:11:10,923
is when Julia Child
that we know comes to life.
311
00:11:10,953 --> 00:11:14,493
She has all these books,
she's huge on TV.
312
00:11:14,495 --> 00:11:18,130
We have the French culinary know-how
313
00:11:18,132 --> 00:11:19,437
that we got from Julia Child.
314
00:11:19,467 --> 00:11:22,802
Paul is like, cool, I'm proud of you.
315
00:11:22,804 --> 00:11:24,770
She's a big bitch but I love her.
316
00:11:24,772 --> 00:11:26,505
He was an amazing husband to her.
317
00:11:26,507 --> 00:11:27,602
He loved her.
318
00:11:27,632 --> 00:11:28,791
She was an Amazon.
319
00:11:28,821 --> 00:11:29,976
He loved her.
320
00:11:29,978 --> 00:11:32,511
Did you ever see the website
that he created for her?
321
00:11:32,541 --> 00:11:33,417
No.
322
00:11:33,447 --> 00:11:35,514
You've never been to amazon.com?
323
00:11:35,516 --> 00:11:36,916
Shut your mouth.
324
00:11:36,918 --> 00:11:38,551
Well, 'cause you called her Amazon.
325
00:11:38,553 --> 00:11:40,275
Shut your mouth, Derek.
326
00:11:40,305 --> 00:11:41,737
I... I thought it was a real website
327
00:11:41,739 --> 00:11:43,782
dedicated to Julia Child
by Paul Child and like,
328
00:11:43,812 --> 00:11:44,874
he was like,
329
00:11:44,876 --> 00:11:49,011
"She's a Big Bitch
But I Love Her Volume Five."
330
00:11:49,013 --> 00:11:50,346
And so they were very happy
331
00:11:50,348 --> 00:11:52,648
and she became this huge success,
332
00:11:52,650 --> 00:11:57,320
and it was all because
of Julia's career as a spy
333
00:11:57,322 --> 00:12:00,489
in espionage and because of Paul Child.
334
00:12:00,491 --> 00:12:02,692
Bing bang boom.
335
00:12:02,694 --> 00:12:03,859
(Belches)
336
00:12:03,861 --> 00:12:04,694
I keep... I'm so sorry.
337
00:12:04,696 --> 00:12:06,104
I'm so embarrassed. I keep burping.
338
00:12:06,134 --> 00:12:07,029
- Why?
- 'Cause ladies
339
00:12:07,031 --> 00:12:09,031
don't burp and I try to be a lady.
340
00:12:09,033 --> 00:12:10,184
But it'll also be on TV
341
00:12:10,214 --> 00:12:11,222
and it'll be great.
342
00:12:11,252 --> 00:12:12,884
And then people will be like,
343
00:12:12,914 --> 00:12:14,222
- she's a real person.
- Cool cool cool.
344
00:12:14,252 --> 00:12:16,239
Cool cool cool tight tight tight.
345
00:12:18,633 --> 00:12:20,933
(Dramatic music)
346
00:12:21,373 --> 00:12:22,697
- Cheers.
- Cheers to you, buddy.
347
00:12:22,727 --> 00:12:23,585
- Here's to you.
- Alright.
348
00:12:23,615 --> 00:12:24,773
- Thank you.
- Thanks for having me on.
349
00:12:24,803 --> 00:12:26,247
Likewise. Thank you.
350
00:12:26,277 --> 00:12:28,767
Hi, I'm Billy Bob Thornton
and today we're gonna be talking
351
00:12:28,797 --> 00:12:30,897
about Benjamin Franklin,
one of my heroes.
352
00:12:31,609 --> 00:12:33,147
You know, most people
just think about him
353
00:12:33,177 --> 00:12:35,747
as the guy with the kite
and the string and the key.
354
00:12:35,777 --> 00:12:37,837
Real quick, I'm just so excited
for Bad Santa 2.
355
00:12:37,867 --> 00:12:39,441
I didn't come here
to talk about Bad Santa.
356
00:12:39,471 --> 00:12:41,208
I'm sorry, I... I know.
357
00:12:41,238 --> 00:12:42,764
So, a guy like Franklin
358
00:12:42,794 --> 00:12:45,513
who did, you know, invent things
like bifocals and...
359
00:12:45,543 --> 00:12:47,126
Are those bifocals?
360
00:12:47,156 --> 00:12:47,840
No, they're not.
361
00:12:47,870 --> 00:12:50,640
- These are just... I'm light sensitive.
- Albino?
362
00:12:50,778 --> 00:12:52,316
I'm obviously not an albino.
363
00:12:52,346 --> 00:12:54,425
Is your partner really that short...
364
00:12:54,637 --> 00:12:56,399
- in the movie.
- Which movie?
365
00:12:56,429 --> 00:12:57,537
Bad Santa, sorry.
366
00:12:57,567 --> 00:12:59,433
He's a dwarf, of course
he's that [bleep] short.
367
00:12:59,463 --> 00:13:00,820
- It's...
- What kind of question is that?
368
00:13:00,850 --> 00:13:02,758
It's an honest question. I was curious.
369
00:13:02,788 --> 00:13:04,033
I didn't know if it was CGI.
370
00:13:04,063 --> 00:13:05,198
Or maybe he's really tall
371
00:13:05,228 --> 00:13:06,235
and you guys shrunk him.
372
00:13:06,265 --> 00:13:07,135
Yeah, that's what we did.
373
00:13:07,165 --> 00:13:09,651
We... we took a guy who's 6'5"
374
00:13:09,681 --> 00:13:11,719
and shrunk him down
for the [bleep] movie.
375
00:13:11,749 --> 00:13:12,900
- Wow!
- Yeah.
376
00:13:12,930 --> 00:13:13,925
Only in Hollywood.
377
00:13:13,955 --> 00:13:15,625
Am I on [bleep] acid?
378
00:13:17,745 --> 00:13:19,233
What are you drinking?
Molasses? You wanna...
379
00:13:19,263 --> 00:13:21,163
Have you ever had molasses?
380
00:13:21,165 --> 00:13:22,531
Yeah, I hate it.
381
00:13:22,533 --> 00:13:23,733
There was one time when I was growing up
382
00:13:23,735 --> 00:13:25,635
and I was a little kid
and my dad had gotten, like,
383
00:13:25,637 --> 00:13:27,279
some molasses and he made pancakes
384
00:13:27,309 --> 00:13:29,599
and I was like, pancake night!
385
00:13:29,629 --> 00:13:31,974
And so I just dumped it
so it just like...
386
00:13:31,976 --> 00:13:35,911
was like, huge just black pile
on my plate and I... it was,
387
00:13:35,913 --> 00:13:37,847
like, the most bitter gr... I was like,
388
00:13:37,849 --> 00:13:39,203
oh, this is the greatest thing ever.
389
00:13:39,233 --> 00:13:41,851
But no, no no no, no no. No.
390
00:13:41,881 --> 00:13:43,212
It's [bleep] deadly.
391
00:13:43,242 --> 00:13:44,587
Anything can kill you.
392
00:13:44,589 --> 00:13:45,588
Anything can kill you.
393
00:13:45,590 --> 00:13:46,555
Cheers.
394
00:13:46,557 --> 00:13:48,463
(Laughter)
395
00:13:49,422 --> 00:13:51,198
Hello, I'm Lucius Dillon,
396
00:13:51,228 --> 00:13:56,265
and today we're going to talk
about the Great Molasses Flood.
397
00:13:57,836 --> 00:14:02,672
My story starts... our story
starts at... 19... hmm, hmm, hmm.
398
00:14:02,674 --> 00:14:04,974
Our story starts at 1915.
399
00:14:04,976 --> 00:14:08,311
So the Purity Distillery,
which was in North Boston
400
00:14:08,341 --> 00:14:10,546
in this area, is a very industrial area.
401
00:14:10,548 --> 00:14:13,683
There was a bunch of Italian,
Irish immigrants
402
00:14:13,685 --> 00:14:14,917
all living in this area.
403
00:14:14,919 --> 00:14:18,721
Molasses was a big mother[bleep] deal.
404
00:14:18,723 --> 00:14:21,257
When they distilled it
it would turn into rum,
405
00:14:21,259 --> 00:14:26,055
so it was a huge commodity, but
prohibition was coming around.
406
00:14:26,085 --> 00:14:28,898
But there's a year-long grace period
407
00:14:28,900 --> 00:14:30,299
so they came up with a great idea.
408
00:14:30,301 --> 00:14:34,837
It was like, okay, what we can
do is, for a whole year,
409
00:14:34,839 --> 00:14:39,275
we can make as much liquor
and rum and everything,
410
00:14:39,277 --> 00:14:43,880
so let's just get as much
[bleep] molasses as we can.
411
00:14:43,882 --> 00:14:48,464
You know what, we need
to build a huge tank
412
00:14:48,494 --> 00:14:51,116
that could fill all this
lovely molasses.
413
00:14:51,146 --> 00:14:52,555
So they got a guy
414
00:14:52,557 --> 00:14:54,790
who was the treasurer
of the company, Arthur Jell.
415
00:14:54,792 --> 00:14:57,560
And they're like, uh, have you
had any architect experience?
416
00:14:57,562 --> 00:15:00,930
Have you any... any
engineering education?
417
00:15:00,932 --> 00:15:02,565
Nope, nope.
418
00:15:02,567 --> 00:15:04,875
Uh, they're like, hey,
can you read this blueprint?
419
00:15:04,905 --> 00:15:06,702
Uh, why do I need
to read this blueprint?
420
00:15:06,704 --> 00:15:10,239
That... that goes for the guys
in the hats and the...
421
00:15:10,241 --> 00:15:11,307
The construction workers?
422
00:15:11,309 --> 00:15:12,241
Yeah.
423
00:15:12,243 --> 00:15:13,405
The construction workers.
424
00:15:13,435 --> 00:15:15,373
They can read it. It's fine.
425
00:15:15,403 --> 00:15:17,080
All right, you're our guy. Great.
426
00:15:17,082 --> 00:15:19,045
So he didn't know
what the [bleep] he was doing.
427
00:15:19,075 --> 00:15:21,918
Any corner that needed
to be cut, he cut it.
428
00:15:21,920 --> 00:15:25,535
So they built this thing very terribly.
429
00:15:25,565 --> 00:15:29,459
They would hear groans
and gurgles from this tank.
430
00:15:29,461 --> 00:15:34,263
- It was like...
- (Groans)
431
00:15:34,265 --> 00:15:35,264
(Snorts)
432
00:15:35,266 --> 00:15:36,592
(Laughs)
433
00:15:36,622 --> 00:15:39,759
(Groaning)
434
00:15:41,539 --> 00:15:43,082
Like it was... it was gonna barf.
435
00:15:43,112 --> 00:15:44,674
It's gonna pretty much puke.
436
00:15:44,676 --> 00:15:47,076
So near the tank was Engine Number 31,
437
00:15:47,078 --> 00:15:50,413
and in that firehouse
was a bunch of firemen,
438
00:15:50,415 --> 00:15:53,583
so we had Bill Connor,
who was the chief.
439
00:15:53,585 --> 00:15:57,086
We had George Layhe,
and around lunchtime, you know,
440
00:15:57,088 --> 00:16:00,356
every day, they would
get together, play billiards.
441
00:16:00,358 --> 00:16:02,492
There was a stonecutter
who would come by
442
00:16:02,494 --> 00:16:04,427
named John Barry,
who would just liked to come
443
00:16:04,429 --> 00:16:07,497
every now and again, and he was like,
444
00:16:07,499 --> 00:16:11,100
look, I... I'm really worried
that this tank's gonna...
445
00:16:11,102 --> 00:16:13,403
it's gonna explode.
446
00:16:13,405 --> 00:16:15,805
I mean, of course
the thing leaks immediately
447
00:16:15,807 --> 00:16:17,640
and Arthur Jell was like, it's fine.
448
00:16:17,642 --> 00:16:19,776
This is still a solid structure.
449
00:16:19,778 --> 00:16:22,795
And everyone was like,
but you can see leaks
450
00:16:22,825 --> 00:16:23,985
from the tank.
451
00:16:24,015 --> 00:16:26,137
Okay, well, uh, we can fix that.
452
00:16:26,167 --> 00:16:26,908
We'll paint it brown
453
00:16:26,938 --> 00:16:28,907
so you can't see
the molasses coming out.
454
00:16:28,937 --> 00:16:29,611
What?
455
00:16:29,641 --> 00:16:31,137
That doesn't help anything.
456
00:16:31,139 --> 00:16:32,605
I'm so worried that this is gonna fail.
457
00:16:32,607 --> 00:16:35,985
Arthur Jell was like, we're gonna make
458
00:16:36,015 --> 00:16:38,311
a bazillion dollars off of this.
459
00:16:38,313 --> 00:16:39,996
What could possibly go wrong?
460
00:16:40,026 --> 00:16:42,448
What could possibly
461
00:16:42,450 --> 00:16:44,050
go wrong?
462
00:16:45,050 --> 00:16:46,352
Don't do that shit.
463
00:16:46,354 --> 00:16:47,920
Why does it scare you so much?
464
00:16:47,922 --> 00:16:50,289
'Cause it makes me
have to try to attempt...
465
00:16:50,291 --> 00:16:51,724
I know, you can't do it.
466
00:16:51,959 --> 00:16:53,393
But I'm gonna do it for a little bit.
467
00:16:53,423 --> 00:16:55,094
Well then, I want to do it too.
468
00:16:55,096 --> 00:16:56,496
Okay.
469
00:16:57,444 --> 00:16:58,632
Yeah, see?
470
00:16:59,194 --> 00:17:00,400
Good work.
471
00:17:00,594 --> 00:17:04,263
So, it was January 15, 1919,
472
00:17:04,293 --> 00:17:06,272
and the Purity Distilling Company
473
00:17:06,274 --> 00:17:08,107
filled this [bleep] to the brim.
474
00:17:08,109 --> 00:17:09,331
This tank fills
475
00:17:09,361 --> 00:17:13,222
2.3 million gallons
476
00:17:13,252 --> 00:17:14,781
of this crap.
477
00:17:14,783 --> 00:17:15,920
(Gasps)
478
00:17:15,950 --> 00:17:18,095
Look at you!
479
00:17:18,319 --> 00:17:20,753
Look at you.
480
00:17:20,755 --> 00:17:23,155
Not... no, I'm still here.
481
00:17:23,157 --> 00:17:25,291
Uh... (laughs)
482
00:17:25,293 --> 00:17:26,472
You're so embarrassed.
483
00:17:26,502 --> 00:17:28,327
You're so embarrassed.
484
00:17:28,329 --> 00:17:31,071
Anyway... um...
485
00:17:31,394 --> 00:17:33,432
so around lunchtime
486
00:17:33,434 --> 00:17:36,602
at Fire Station 31,
487
00:17:36,604 --> 00:17:38,337
they heard just like
this horrible explosion.
488
00:17:38,339 --> 00:17:39,605
It was kind of like a...
489
00:17:39,607 --> 00:17:41,173
(Imitates explosion)
490
00:17:41,175 --> 00:17:43,130
(Imitating squirting)
491
00:17:43,160 --> 00:17:44,677
Maybe not as much of a duck,
492
00:17:44,679 --> 00:17:47,547
but they heard a horrible sound.
493
00:17:47,549 --> 00:17:49,515
That was not good.
494
00:17:50,396 --> 00:17:53,633
So John Barry went up to the window.
495
00:17:53,663 --> 00:17:55,800
The tank burst.
496
00:17:55,830 --> 00:17:58,768
Then this sort of huge wave,
497
00:17:58,798 --> 00:18:01,253
was like a... (imitates explosion)
498
00:18:01,283 --> 00:18:02,729
Of... oh, excuse me.
499
00:18:02,731 --> 00:18:07,734
Of just pure force and evil and terror.
500
00:18:07,736 --> 00:18:09,369
It knocked down buildings.
501
00:18:09,399 --> 00:18:12,259
It knocked down railway cars.
502
00:18:12,289 --> 00:18:14,578
And people were just, like,
knocked off their ass.
503
00:18:14,608 --> 00:18:17,676
It was also horses
because of the time period
504
00:18:17,678 --> 00:18:19,082
that, like, these horses
were knocked on their ass.
505
00:18:19,119 --> 00:18:22,047
The horses were like, this is bullshit.
506
00:18:22,049 --> 00:18:25,145
Why am I drowning in this goo?
507
00:18:25,175 --> 00:18:27,959
And he saw this 15-foot high
508
00:18:27,989 --> 00:18:30,234
wave of molasses
509
00:18:30,264 --> 00:18:33,459
coming towards him and he's
like, holy shit, guys, run!
510
00:18:33,461 --> 00:18:35,995
Run run run run run run run.
511
00:18:36,025 --> 00:18:39,153
The force is so horrible.
512
00:18:39,183 --> 00:18:41,234
It takes this whole building
that they're in,
513
00:18:41,236 --> 00:18:43,136
pushes it off their foundation,
514
00:18:43,166 --> 00:18:45,538
and just carries this building
515
00:18:45,540 --> 00:18:47,921
and it almost goes into the harbor.
516
00:18:47,951 --> 00:18:51,744
They're pretty much trapped
with tons of debris
517
00:18:51,746 --> 00:18:53,279
and they have molasses
518
00:18:53,281 --> 00:18:57,116
just slowly rising up
519
00:18:57,118 --> 00:19:01,522
and George Layhe is pinned down
underneath this pool table.
520
00:19:01,960 --> 00:19:03,122
Oh, my God.
521
00:19:03,124 --> 00:19:04,056
- Yeah, see it?
- Okay.
522
00:19:04,058 --> 00:19:05,157
It's like chocolate.
523
00:19:05,159 --> 00:19:08,160
Mmm.
524
00:19:08,162 --> 00:19:10,029
Mmmm!
525
00:19:10,031 --> 00:19:11,611
Mmmmm!
526
00:19:11,641 --> 00:19:13,933
Oh, my... no [bleep] way.
527
00:19:13,935 --> 00:19:16,269
If God could shit on licorice,
528
00:19:16,271 --> 00:19:17,470
that's what it tastes like.
529
00:19:17,472 --> 00:19:18,504
I know!
530
00:19:18,506 --> 00:19:19,505
Stay tuned for more
531
00:19:19,507 --> 00:19:21,420
"Drunk History, Molasses Face"...
532
00:19:21,450 --> 00:19:22,775
I mean, "Molasses Flood."
533
00:19:22,777 --> 00:19:24,548
- (Laughs)
- [Bleep]
534
00:19:29,215 --> 00:19:31,394
So anyway, drinking.
535
00:19:34,094 --> 00:19:35,674
Oh. Don't forget that.
536
00:19:35,704 --> 00:19:37,333
(Chuckles)
537
00:19:37,543 --> 00:19:38,801
Do you remember where you were?
538
00:19:38,803 --> 00:19:41,333
We were talking about...
539
00:19:41,621 --> 00:19:42,745
okay.
540
00:19:43,332 --> 00:19:45,608
Hi, everybody. We're back.
541
00:19:45,610 --> 00:19:47,314
So pretty much they're [bleep],
542
00:19:47,344 --> 00:19:50,345
and they would hear screams
from George Layhe.
543
00:19:50,347 --> 00:19:51,947
Help, I'm gonna die.
544
00:19:51,949 --> 00:19:54,416
John is like, George,
everything's gonna be fine.
545
00:19:54,418 --> 00:19:56,164
Just... just keep your chin up.
546
00:19:56,194 --> 00:19:57,119
Literally.
547
00:19:57,149 --> 00:20:00,261
He's like, that's
a terrible thing to say.
548
00:20:01,547 --> 00:20:05,228
And he [bleep] drowned in this shit.
549
00:20:05,230 --> 00:20:07,864
Takes everyone four hours
trying to save them.
550
00:20:08,345 --> 00:20:11,907
21 people drowned.
551
00:20:11,937 --> 00:20:16,443
150 people were injured because of this,
552
00:20:16,473 --> 00:20:17,561
and the next day,
553
00:20:17,591 --> 00:20:21,033
John Barry's hair
turned completely white,
554
00:20:21,063 --> 00:20:23,083
and the people, they were
trying to say, like,
555
00:20:23,113 --> 00:20:24,685
okay, who's to blame?
556
00:20:24,715 --> 00:20:27,834
Is this... I burped while I said this.
557
00:20:27,864 --> 00:20:29,159
Who's to blame?
558
00:20:29,189 --> 00:20:32,313
And of course they're
just like, pfft, not us.
559
00:20:32,343 --> 00:20:34,223
- (Chuckles)
- Good night, everybody.
560
00:20:34,253 --> 00:20:36,397
(Blows raspberry)
561
00:20:36,427 --> 00:20:37,910
The cleanup took
562
00:20:37,940 --> 00:20:41,247
87,000 man hours.
563
00:20:41,249 --> 00:20:45,918
The harbor for six months
was just brown with molasses,
564
00:20:45,920 --> 00:20:50,036
so even to this day on a really hot day
565
00:20:50,066 --> 00:20:51,503
the people still claim
566
00:20:51,505 --> 00:20:54,564
that they can smell molasses in Boston.
567
00:20:54,594 --> 00:20:56,948
It [bleep] Boston up.
568
00:20:56,978 --> 00:20:58,911
Arthur Jell did not get fired.
569
00:20:58,913 --> 00:21:01,191
Arthur Jell got promoted.
570
00:21:01,221 --> 00:21:03,973
That guy had a great [bleep] life
571
00:21:04,003 --> 00:21:07,721
while other people were dead
because of him.
572
00:21:08,031 --> 00:21:11,018
(Slurping)
573
00:21:13,874 --> 00:21:16,796
Pinkies out 'cause we're classy.
574
00:21:17,048 --> 00:21:19,315
This is a [bleep] TV show.
575
00:21:19,462 --> 00:21:20,884
Get it out there.
576
00:21:20,886 --> 00:21:25,221
We... we'll kiss tips but that's
a private thing for later.
577
00:21:25,396 --> 00:21:27,446
Oh, friendship is real.
578
00:21:27,476 --> 00:21:29,531
I know, it's for reals.
579
00:21:29,561 --> 00:21:31,094
- We like life.
- Mm-hmm.
580
00:21:31,096 --> 00:21:33,627
And each others in it.
581
00:21:33,657 --> 00:21:35,231
Here, good night.
582
00:21:35,233 --> 00:21:38,201
(Triumphant music)
583
00:21:39,034 --> 00:21:44,360
? ?
584
00:21:46,929 --> 00:21:56,805
= synced and corrected by Shahrazade =
... www.addic7ed.com ...
585
00:21:56,855 --> 00:22:01,405
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
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