All language subtitles for Doogie Howser MD s02e05 Car Wars.eng

No. Absolutely not.

Dad, just listen.

I said no, Douglas.

And no means no.

But...

The car?

O.K., bring me up
to speed.

What came before no?

Nothing.

I just showed him the picture.

You got to get this car, doog.

You know how many thousands
of eligible females

are just waiting to jump
into a classic convertible?

Don't tell me.
Tell him.

Dr. howser,
did doog tell you about the owner...

An old lady
who only drove to church?

Vincent, this is
a family discussion.

Should I get
Mrs. howser?

Stay out of it.

O.K. I'm out of it.

I'm Switzerland.

Neutral.

Douglas, I am not
against the idea

of you getting a new car.

I saw a Japanese import

that would suit you
to a "t"...

Great gas mileage,
reliable, cute.

A weeniemobile.

Vincent...

I'm out. I'm out.

Dad, Vinnie's right.

This is my first real car.

I don't want to look back

and think
to myself... cute.

I want something cool.

Obviously, you don't
understand the appeal of this car.

As a matter of fact,
i do understand.

A 1957 Chevy convertible
was my first car.

I drove it for 10 years.

Then you know it's reliable.

It was reliable in 1957.

Dad, I'm not
entering it at le mans.

I'm driving it to the hospital.

What happens if you're
on an emergency

and you have a breakdown?

A car like this
is fine for a feckless senior like Vincent.

I've got as much feck
as the next guy.

You are a doctor.
You have responsibilities.

Dad, it's my money.

It's not your money yet.

Until you're 18,
I'm still in charge of your funds.

I'm involved.

And my decision is no.

This is great!

We got him right
where we want him.

What are you talking about?

He started and ended with no.

It was a bonanza of nos.

Doog,
nobody knows that word better than me.

There are nuances to no
i have an ear for.

At first, I thought
we were sunk.

Then I saw an opening.

What opening?

The key words are,
"that was the first car I owned."

Men have
an emotional attachment to their first cars

which we are going
to ruthlessly exploit.

Trust me, doog.

I know how to play this man
like an organ.

This is great, doog!

It handles like a dream.

With me pushing it does.

This is like
Fred flintstone's car.

Hey, don't knock it.

Fred loved that car,

and you're going
to love this one, too,

as soon as we've done
some fine tuning.

I don't know about this.

My dad is going to flip.

Doog... Do you
remember mitzi?

Your psychotic cocker spaniel?

Yeah.

I loved that dog.

Every time my old man
yelled at me,

she'd snap at his knees.

Anyway, I didn't just ask him

if I could have a pet.

I brought her home,
got her to lick him...

He couldn't say no.

So we're letting
the car lick dad.

Exactly!

Be happy, howser.

What's the meaning of this?

The meaning is
i am not a child anymore.

He hasn't bought it yet.

It's on approval
for the weekend.

Did Vincent talk you into this?

Dad.

He's got his own mind.

I am 17 years old.
I'm a physician.

Every day at work
i make adult decisions,

and then you treat me
like a kid.

That is exactly
how you're behaving,

like a spoiled, willful child.

I am sick of you trying
to control my life.

I am not trying
to control your life.

I know more about this
than you do.

Excuse me.

Do you mind
if I answer my beeper...

Sir?

Get that heap out of my garage.

I'd really like
to do that, Dr. h.

Unfortunately, we had
mechanical troubles,

and now I can't seem
to get it started.

Why not?

I don't exactly know.

See, mechanics isn't
my strong suit.

I'm an artistic type.

Uh, uh, uh, uh.

Boy, you are upset, aren't you?

I'm referring to the engine.

Did it go uh, uh, uh, uh

or click, click, click?

Click, click, click.

How did you know?

I couldn't afford
a mechanic with my car.

Back in those days,
it was man against machine.

This smell takes me back.

Looking at that engine

is like looking down
the corridor of my past.

If only buzz could see me now.

Buzz?

Buzz Ballantine, an old friend.

You had a friend called buzz?

What's that short for?
Buzzard?

Nah, his real name was Charles.

We were in college together.

When we graduated,
we took one last spree

before we put our noses
to the grindstone.

We threw sleeping bags
in the car

and drove cross-country.

Route 66 all the way.

What a great adventure that was.

You... Buzz...

And the old '57 Chevy.

What a combo.

What a car.

Take it easy, man.

Don't come near me.

Calm down.

You o.K. Over there?

Hey, hey, hey, hey.
What's going on here?

I was going
to take blood, and he freaked.

They said it wouldn't hurt,
and it did.

Frank, calm down.

He's not usually like this.

This is Ms. Willis.

She works at
a veterinary hospital with Mr. murison.

What's wrong with him?

You mean, besides being slow?

I don't know.

He keeps getting dizzy.

He even passed out.

We tried getting him
to the doctor, but he hates going.

Hi, frank.

I'm doogie.

We just want to look.

No needles.

Do you like to play games?

No. I want to go home.

You'd like this game.

I'll make a deal.

We'll take it step by step.

It's called doogie says.

I'll tell you to do something,

and if you think
it'll hurt at all,

you don't have to do it.

Ready?

Doogie says put down the tray.

It's o.K. To say no.

O.K., you got me.
1 point for you.

O.K. Doogie says
sit down on this bed.

1 point for me.

All right.

Since you're new at this,

I'll let you take that back.

It's high.

2 points for you.

Frank, you're creaming me.

This is an ophthalmoscope.

It shines a light
into your eyes.

Doogie says look straight ahead.

It's all right.

You can inspect the equipment.

It's funny.
Where'd you get it?

I can't tell you
till the game's over.

Doogie says look straight ahead.

That's 3 points.

I'm winning.

The next thing I know,
buzz has pulled over

and two stunningly beautiful

ute Indian women in native garb

are climbing into
the back seat of the car.

Well, how much garb
we talking here,

upper garb? Lower garb?

Vincent,
these people have a lot of ethnic pride.

Dr. h, I'm Italian.

I know all about ethnic pride.

All right.

Give her a try.

Hey!

Dr. h, you're
a mechanical genius.

It's like you and this
automobile have this incredible...

Rapport.

Exactly.

Is this the infamous car?

It's beautiful.
What's your problem?

I didn't say there
was anything wrong with the car, dear.

I bet you look great
behind that wheel.

No wonder you had all
the girls after you.

I suppose I had
a certain rakish charm.

Well, uh... It's running.

Guess I better take it back
to the little old lady.

Just a second.

I don't want you
to get stranded.

This is still
a temperamental car.

I don't want
this piece of junk cluttering your garage.

Well, I think junk
is an exaggeration.

Some people consider
this car to be a piece of americana.

Want to climb in, doll face?

Yeah, come on, Mrs. h.

It's a genuine antique.

The car, I mean.

That's it.

Just make yourselves
comfortable.

Plenty of room if you
want to stretch out.

I'll close the door
on my way out.

You let him go?
How could you?

If a patient
insists on leaving the hospital

against medical
advice, we have to discharge him.

The man has a large
bleeding colonic mass.

Without surgery, he could die.

I'm aware of that.
So is the patient.

How can he be?
Mentally he's a kid.

Hve you met a kid who could
conceptualize death?

As the psychiatrist
on this case,

it is my opinion

that Mr. murison's
degree of retardation

does not preclude
his understanding

of the risks and
benefits of surgery.

He functions independently,

he lives alone,
holds down a job, and pays bills.

Frank's like I was
when I had leukemia.

I would have said no
to the treatment, too.

I was 6 years old.

I didn't understand the danger.

All I knew was I was scared
and wanted to go home.

Doctor howser, you're
absolutely right.

That's a good analogy.

Unfortunately,
it doesn't help us.

Our hands are tied.

Well, mine aren't.

Ray, hold up.

Frank, I want to talk to you.

My stomach hurts.

They did things to me,
and it hurts.

I'm going back to work.

Easy. He just
wants to talk.

I can't let you
walk out of here.

You're sick. You need
this operation.

No operation!

Stay away from me!

Frank!

Frank!

Hey. Hey,
what are you...

I know how to solve
the problem, and he won't listen.

How do you reason with a child?

First, be sure you're right.

I am.

Be as difficult
as they're being.

Never back down,
even if it means a screaming match.

And if all else fails,
fight dirty.

The ends justify the means.

Is that what you're saying?

Mmm. I guess.

You're taking dad's approach.

I'd like to think
I'm a little more enlightened.

I don't know why.

You sound exactly like him.

No, this is completely
different.

I'm a physician dealing
with a seriously ill patient.

He is a stubborn dictator
who reads consumer reports.

Doogie, that's not fair.

- Whoa!
- Hey, Dr. h!

You're like the god
of mechanics.

For someone with an aversion
to antique automobiles,

he's sure taking
interest in this one.

You know someone who could
help you with frank?

You're just trying
to get us to make up.

Silly me. Always struggling
for family unity.

A minor tune-up,
and that car is pur...

Douglas.

Dad.

Boy, what a lemon.

I'm going to my room.

Putty-tat, putty-tat.

Kitty. Kitty.

Hey, bobo.

Bye-bye.

Hi, frank.

Remember me?

I think we should
have a talk about the operation.

You need it.

It's no good trying to run away.

I'm not leaving.

I won't listen.

Frank, I'm talking to you.

I know more about this
than you do.

No. You go home!

You're upsetting the animals.

Dr. caplan
will be very mad.

O.K. I won't yell anymore.

I have work to do.

How's my baby?

Ohh. Who's this?

Caesar.

He's been sick.

He needs medicine.

And you're going
to make him better?

Yeah.

I love Caesar.

Caesar loves me.

He loves me best.

He doesn't like that
much, does he?

No. He hates it.

I have to hold him tight.

What happens if you
don't hold him down?

He'd run away.

He's very fast.

So why don't you let him go?

He needs medicine.

He doesn't understand
that, does he?

No.

But I do.

I know what's best for him.

And I know what's best
for you, frank.

You're scared, just like Caesar.

You wish you could run out.

If I could hold you,
i would, but I can't,

so listen to me
because I know what's best for you.

Am I going to die?

Not if you have this operation.

Will you tell
Dr. caplan?

We'll both tell him.

Hey, dad.

How's it going?

Well, it's not a pretty sight.

This rear seal.

Dad, we need to talk.

Well, I know what
you're going to say.

No, I don't think you do.

I think we should
take the car back.

What?

What?

Today I had a lesson
in paternal feelings.

For the first time,

I started
to understand those feelings.

I realize that
you're not trying to control my life.

You're trying to do
what's best for me.

So let's take it back,

get something more sensible.

Oh, man!

I see what you mean.

This is a dream car.

The question is,
can we live in a dream?

Let's give it a shot.

I'll take it back tonight.

Actually, I'll
take it back myself.

I promised to take
your mother for a spin.

O.K.

Ever wonder what a lug wrench
feels like up your nose?

Calm down.

Calm down? Two days.

Two days of route 66
and the saga of buzz Ballantine,

and you're telling me
to calm down?

You're killing me, howser.

Douglas... I have
something for you.

Last couple of days,

I've been thinking about
all the fun times

I had in my car.

The wonderful memories,

all those wonderful memories

that nourished me
over the years.

I realized you only
get to do those things

at a certain time in your life.

In your case, that's now.

Dad, are you sure?

This isn't the most
responsible choice.

No. No, it isn't.

But if anyone's earned the right

to be a little
irresponsible, it's you.

I remember once...
You were about 3.

I had you in my lap
on the passenger side of the car,

and this truck suddenly
pulled out ahead.

I held you so tight,

I left little fingermark
bruises on you.

Yeah... That's the way
it is with kids.

You hold them so tight,
sometimes you hurt them

without meaning to.

Just be patient with me, son.

I'm learning to let go.

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