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(groovy music)
2
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(cash register dings)
3
00:00:21,785 --> 00:00:24,629
♫ Ground floor perfumery,
stationery and leather goods
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00:00:24,629 --> 00:00:27,345
♫ Wigs and haberdashery,
kitchenware and food
5
00:00:27,345 --> 00:00:29,595
♫ Going up
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- Oh, is that the best
you can do Miss Brahms.
7
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- Oh it's not my job
is it, I'll try again.
8
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(laughter)
9
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(elevator gears grinding)
10
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(laughter)
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Well look, the girl who operates the lift
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00:00:57,549 --> 00:00:59,709
should be here to help us with the move.
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- Oh never mind, come along.
14
00:01:05,948 --> 00:01:08,746
Oh, Miss Brahms, pull your skirt down.
15
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- But we're not open.
16
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- That may be, but now that
we're sharing our department,
17
00:01:12,498 --> 00:01:15,147
with gents outfitting, it might pay us
18
00:01:15,147 --> 00:01:17,814
to be a little more circumspect.
19
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- Oh blimey, women drivers.
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- That'll do, Mr. Mash,
instead of standing there,
21
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making sarcastic remarks,
you could give us a hand.
22
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- Middle class cow.
23
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(laughter)
24
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- Having trouble with Mrs. Slocombe?
25
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- All that women's lib's
gone to her head, mate.
26
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- Oh, I hope not.
27
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If she burns her bra, we'll have to call
28
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out the London Fire Brigade.
29
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(laughter)
30
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- Women's department.
31
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Who ever heard of a women's
department on this floor?
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It's been men's ever since I was a boy.
33
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- That Mrs. Pankhurst
really started something.
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- Well what are you going to
do about it Mr. Humphries?
35
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- Well as a matter of fact, I was thinking
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00:01:59,144 --> 00:02:01,987
of chaining meself to the lift gates.
37
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- Eh?
38
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Kinky.
39
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(laughter)
40
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Here you are then.
41
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- What's that?
42
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- Mr. Knowles sent it up from display.
43
00:02:16,382 --> 00:02:19,389
It's the new Beauty Belle
point of sale model.
44
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Here watch this, look.
45
00:02:20,782 --> 00:02:22,941
(bells ding)
46
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(laughter)
47
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- I'm not having that common
thing in my department.
48
00:02:29,106 --> 00:02:30,975
- You're just jealous
'cause you can't do it.
49
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(laughter)
50
00:02:33,506 --> 00:02:35,423
Oh I don't know though.
51
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- Hide it somewhere Miss Brahms.
52
00:02:39,300 --> 00:02:41,465
- Oh no, you can't do that Mrs. Slocombe.
53
00:02:41,465 --> 00:02:43,067
- Why not Captain Peacock?
54
00:02:43,067 --> 00:02:44,693
- Because we now have the sole concession
55
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for Beauty Belle.
56
00:02:45,813 --> 00:02:47,453
- I'm not surprised.
57
00:02:47,453 --> 00:02:49,415
- And if you don't display
it somewhere prominent,
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00:02:49,415 --> 00:02:51,145
you'll have trouble with
the buying department.
59
00:02:51,145 --> 00:02:52,213
- I see.
60
00:02:52,213 --> 00:02:54,907
Find somewhere prominent
for it Miss Brahms.
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00:02:54,907 --> 00:02:59,074
And in the meantime, I'll just
shove it under the counter.
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(banging)
63
00:03:05,425 --> 00:03:07,675
(laughter)
64
00:03:09,187 --> 00:03:12,136
- Has anyone got a ladder?
65
00:03:12,136 --> 00:03:14,027
- I say is that the best you can do.
66
00:03:14,027 --> 00:03:17,545
- It's the nearest I've
been to it all morning.
67
00:03:17,545 --> 00:03:20,225
Here hang on, give me a hand with this.
68
00:03:20,225 --> 00:03:21,142
Well come on, which end do you want,
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00:03:21,142 --> 00:03:21,975
heads or tails.
70
00:03:21,975 --> 00:03:22,827
- Now do be careful.
71
00:03:22,827 --> 00:03:25,335
Mrs. Slocombe had to
wait six weeks for it.
72
00:03:25,335 --> 00:03:26,867
- Well when you get to her
age, what can you expect.
73
00:03:26,867 --> 00:03:28,702
(laughter)
74
00:03:28,702 --> 00:03:31,511
- Mr. Lucas, put something on it.
75
00:03:31,511 --> 00:03:33,984
It is a house rule, you know.
76
00:03:33,984 --> 00:03:35,668
- Well, I'm sorry Mr.
Grainger, I thought it
77
00:03:35,668 --> 00:03:37,630
was alright, if it was wearing tights.
78
00:03:37,630 --> 00:03:40,149
- Yes, well it's hardly sufficient is it?
79
00:03:40,149 --> 00:03:40,986
(laughs)
80
00:03:40,986 --> 00:03:42,391
- I see what you mean.
81
00:03:42,391 --> 00:03:45,224
- Anyway, the upper
part should be obscured.
82
00:03:45,224 --> 00:03:46,628
- I'm sorry Mr. Grainger.
83
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(laughter)
84
00:03:48,869 --> 00:03:51,342
- How long have you been
with Grace Brothers,
85
00:03:51,342 --> 00:03:52,387
Mr Lucas?
86
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- One month, Mr. Grainger.
87
00:03:54,152 --> 00:03:56,497
I'm still sort of feeling my way around,
88
00:03:56,497 --> 00:03:57,507
as you might say.
89
00:03:57,507 --> 00:03:58,622
(laughter)
90
00:03:58,622 --> 00:03:59,455
- Yes.
91
00:04:02,423 --> 00:04:03,712
- What about obscuring it?
92
00:04:03,712 --> 00:04:04,908
- Alright then lend us your knickers.
93
00:04:04,908 --> 00:04:06,347
- Now don't you start.
94
00:04:06,347 --> 00:04:08,472
And anyway, they wouldn't
obscure anything.
95
00:04:08,472 --> 00:04:09,749
Oh, the lift doors.
96
00:04:09,749 --> 00:04:12,106
- Hang on, back up.
97
00:04:12,106 --> 00:04:14,773
Where is the button, oh, whoops.
98
00:04:15,902 --> 00:04:18,152
(laughter)
99
00:04:19,417 --> 00:04:20,991
- Where do you want it, Mrs. Slocombe.
100
00:04:20,991 --> 00:04:23,824
- Oh, put it on the podium Miss Brahms.
101
00:04:23,824 --> 00:04:25,983
- Come on dear, you're
going on the podium.
102
00:04:25,983 --> 00:04:27,290
(laughter)
103
00:04:27,290 --> 00:04:29,351
That's it, on there, that's right.
104
00:04:29,351 --> 00:04:31,518
- Oh really not so clumsy.
105
00:04:32,903 --> 00:04:34,903
- Thank you Miss Brahms.
106
00:04:38,430 --> 00:04:42,749
- Just a minute. Isn't
there something missing?
107
00:04:42,749 --> 00:04:45,988
- Well no, I think it looks
quite realistic actually.
108
00:04:45,988 --> 00:04:48,026
Oh, I see what you mean.
109
00:04:48,026 --> 00:04:49,943
It must be in the lift.
110
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- Put the Chandor two
piece on it Miss Brahms.
111
00:04:53,146 --> 00:04:54,267
- Yes, Mrs. Slocombe.
112
00:04:54,267 --> 00:04:55,893
- Oh and hurry up with
that head, Mr. Lucas,
113
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it's nearly opening time.
114
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- I shan't be a minute.
115
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(laughter)
116
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- It suits you.
117
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(laughter)
118
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- I'm sorry.
119
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- The other way 'round, Mr. Lucas.
120
00:05:23,500 --> 00:05:24,333
- Oh yes.
121
00:05:25,590 --> 00:05:26,507
- Oh really.
122
00:05:26,507 --> 00:05:28,757
(laughter)
123
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That's better.
124
00:05:31,024 --> 00:05:33,706
Oh, look what you've done to the nose.
125
00:05:33,706 --> 00:05:35,784
Oh, you've ruined it.
126
00:05:35,784 --> 00:05:39,186
- No I haven't. I haven't ruined it.
127
00:05:39,186 --> 00:05:40,985
Well I mean they always look
too perfect, these models
128
00:05:40,985 --> 00:05:42,552
anyway don't they.
129
00:05:42,552 --> 00:05:45,141
I mean people do have
crooked noses, you know?
130
00:05:45,141 --> 00:05:46,709
Somebody might come in one
day with a crooked nose
131
00:05:46,709 --> 00:05:48,102
look at that dress, and
say I'll have that dress,
132
00:05:48,102 --> 00:05:49,507
it'll go with my crooked nose.
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(laughter)
134
00:05:51,422 --> 00:05:54,023
- I don't think they would, Mr. Lucas.
135
00:05:54,023 --> 00:05:56,229
I'm afraid I shall have to
complain to your superiors
136
00:05:56,229 --> 00:05:57,425
about this.
137
00:05:57,425 --> 00:05:59,747
And in the meantime, Miss Brahms, oh dear,
138
00:05:59,747 --> 00:06:02,150
take the head off that model over there.
139
00:06:02,150 --> 00:06:03,787
- Yeah, but it's not all
his fault, Mrs. Slocombe,
140
00:06:03,787 --> 00:06:05,262
I did ask him to help me.
141
00:06:05,262 --> 00:06:06,782
- Well there will have to be an inquiry.
142
00:06:06,782 --> 00:06:08,269
Somebody will have to pay.
143
00:06:08,269 --> 00:06:09,511
- Well I was only trying to help.
144
00:06:09,511 --> 00:06:11,543
- Oh and look at the marks on the shoes.
145
00:06:11,543 --> 00:06:12,854
- Well I have something to get that off.
146
00:06:12,854 --> 00:06:13,854
- Oh really.
147
00:06:15,269 --> 00:06:18,822
- Hand me some of the cuff
links, will you Mr. Humphries?
148
00:06:18,822 --> 00:06:20,459
- Plain gold or the glittery ones?
149
00:06:20,459 --> 00:06:22,781
- No no, gold is more dignified.
150
00:06:22,781 --> 00:06:25,509
The glitter detracts from the shirt,
151
00:06:25,509 --> 00:06:27,262
and it's the shirt we're trying to show.
152
00:06:27,262 --> 00:06:28,659
- Quite right Mr. Grainger,
I never would have
153
00:06:28,659 --> 00:06:29,492
thought of that.
154
00:06:29,492 --> 00:06:32,270
- Don't rub too hard. Gold
isn't what it used to be.
155
00:06:32,270 --> 00:06:33,187
- No, no it isn't.
156
00:06:33,187 --> 00:06:34,906
Nothing's what it used to
be, is it Mr. Grainger?
157
00:06:34,906 --> 00:06:35,989
- No, indeed.
158
00:06:37,993 --> 00:06:40,467
How do you find young Mr. Lucas?
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00:06:40,467 --> 00:06:41,992
- Oh he's very obliging.
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00:06:41,992 --> 00:06:43,268
- Is he?
161
00:06:43,268 --> 00:06:45,625
- Well I mean he helps out
and that sort of thing.
162
00:06:45,625 --> 00:06:47,262
- Yes, well I think it's time he stopped
163
00:06:47,262 --> 00:06:50,269
helping out the ladies and
returned to his own department.
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00:06:50,269 --> 00:06:51,627
- Shall I tell him?
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00:06:51,627 --> 00:06:52,462
- Yes.
166
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Say that I would like
to have a word with him.
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(spitting)
168
00:06:57,349 --> 00:06:58,310
- Good morning Mr. Lucas.
169
00:06:58,310 --> 00:06:59,622
- Oh.
170
00:06:59,622 --> 00:07:01,828
- Am I to understand that
you have deserted gentlemen's
171
00:07:01,828 --> 00:07:03,627
ready made in favor of the ladies?
172
00:07:03,627 --> 00:07:05,229
- Well I'm just giving
a helping hand, sir.
173
00:07:05,229 --> 00:07:06,947
- Well I'm glad to see that
the arrival of the ladies
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00:07:06,947 --> 00:07:09,432
in your territory hasn't
caused any bad blood.
175
00:07:09,432 --> 00:07:11,255
- Oh no, not from me Captain Peacock.
176
00:07:11,255 --> 00:07:13,983
- Mmmm. One wonders whether
the arrival of gentlemen's
177
00:07:13,983 --> 00:07:15,955
shoes, for instance,
would have been treated
178
00:07:15,955 --> 00:07:17,511
with the same enthusiasm.
179
00:07:17,511 --> 00:07:20,054
- Mr. Lucas is doing his
best to make us feel at home,
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00:07:20,054 --> 00:07:21,667
Captain Peacock,
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00:07:21,667 --> 00:07:23,026
which is more than can
be said for the rest
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of the department.
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00:07:24,430 --> 00:07:26,950
- Well just a passing
phase, Mrs. Slocombe.
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00:07:26,950 --> 00:07:28,831
With your personality,
I'm sure you could charm
185
00:07:28,831 --> 00:07:30,421
the very birds off the trees.
186
00:07:30,421 --> 00:07:32,458
- Oh, oh I wouldn't say that.
187
00:07:32,458 --> 00:07:34,223
- Neither would I.
188
00:07:34,223 --> 00:07:35,942
- And Lucas, while you're down there,
189
00:07:35,942 --> 00:07:37,463
straighten those seams.
190
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I hate to see crooked seams.
191
00:07:39,542 --> 00:07:40,505
- Yes, Mr. Peacock.
192
00:07:40,505 --> 00:07:41,338
- Mmmm?
193
00:07:41,338 --> 00:07:42,838
- Captain Peacock.
194
00:07:46,488 --> 00:07:48,738
(laughter)
195
00:07:51,268 --> 00:07:52,101
- No!
196
00:07:53,989 --> 00:07:57,751
- I'm sorry Mrs. Slocombe,
Captain Peacock told me
197
00:07:57,751 --> 00:07:58,584
to do it.
198
00:07:58,584 --> 00:07:59,467
I mean straighten them, I mean.
199
00:07:59,467 --> 00:08:01,107
Not yours, the dummies.
200
00:08:01,107 --> 00:08:02,071
- Griffin wants you.
201
00:08:02,071 --> 00:08:03,255
- Yes thank you.
202
00:08:03,255 --> 00:08:04,950
(laughter)
203
00:08:04,950 --> 00:08:06,033
I'm so sorry.
204
00:08:09,119 --> 00:08:10,465
- Are you alright Mrs. Slocombe?
205
00:08:10,465 --> 00:08:11,986
- Oh that Mr. Lucas just put his hands
206
00:08:11,986 --> 00:08:13,344
all over me stockings.
207
00:08:13,344 --> 00:08:15,945
- Oh dear. I hope he didn't snag them.
208
00:08:15,945 --> 00:08:20,066
- No, no. He has quite
smooth hands actually.
209
00:08:20,066 --> 00:08:21,506
(laughter)
210
00:08:21,506 --> 00:08:23,421
- You wanted to see me, Mr. Grainger?
211
00:08:23,421 --> 00:08:26,742
- Mr. Lucas, it isn't that
we want to be unfriendly
212
00:08:26,742 --> 00:08:30,271
to the ladies, but at the
same time, we don't want
213
00:08:30,271 --> 00:08:32,988
to be too outgoing in our welcome.
214
00:08:32,988 --> 00:08:34,799
- Well I was only trying to
be helpful, I mean after all,
215
00:08:34,799 --> 00:08:36,228
they are human beings aren't they.
216
00:08:36,228 --> 00:08:38,143
- Yes, you may be right there.
217
00:08:38,143 --> 00:08:40,941
But see it from our point of view.
218
00:08:40,941 --> 00:08:43,786
That section has been part
of the gents ready made
219
00:08:43,786 --> 00:08:47,025
for the last 25 years,
hasn't it Mr. Humphries?
220
00:08:47,025 --> 00:08:48,023
- Yes, Mr. Grainger.
221
00:08:48,023 --> 00:08:51,506
- Now we have 30 percent
less space, which could mean
222
00:08:51,506 --> 00:08:55,673
30 percent less sales and
possibly 30 percent less salesmen.
223
00:08:57,590 --> 00:08:58,751
Am I right Mr. Humphries?
224
00:08:58,751 --> 00:09:00,388
- Quite right, Mr. Grainger.
225
00:09:00,388 --> 00:09:03,778
- And you have only been
with us a very short time,
226
00:09:03,778 --> 00:09:05,311
am I right Mr. Lucas?
227
00:09:05,311 --> 00:09:06,866
- Quite right, Mr. Grainger.
228
00:09:06,866 --> 00:09:09,199
- Just watch it, that's all.
229
00:09:10,222 --> 00:09:11,383
- Don't take any notice of him.
230
00:09:11,383 --> 00:09:14,111
He won't sack you. He's too soft hearted.
231
00:09:14,111 --> 00:09:15,423
He'll get Peacock to do it.
232
00:09:15,423 --> 00:09:17,673
(laughter)
233
00:09:18,859 --> 00:09:20,504
- I mean was that right what
he said about, you know,
234
00:09:20,504 --> 00:09:21,792
30 percent less sales?
235
00:09:21,792 --> 00:09:22,942
- No not in your case.
236
00:09:22,942 --> 00:09:26,111
I mean you couldn't have 30
percent of nothing, could you?
237
00:09:26,111 --> 00:09:27,586
- It's not my fault, is it?
238
00:09:27,586 --> 00:09:30,349
I mean it's all this
stupid seniority thing.
239
00:09:30,349 --> 00:09:32,148
The only chance I get a
look in to serve someone
240
00:09:32,148 --> 00:09:34,180
is when you're too busy
serving somebody else.
241
00:09:34,180 --> 00:09:35,701
- Yeah, well when you've
been here as long as I have,
242
00:09:35,701 --> 00:09:37,152
you'll get first batch.
243
00:09:37,152 --> 00:09:38,789
- By that time, I shan't
hear what the customer's
244
00:09:38,789 --> 00:09:40,671
asking for, for the creaking of my joints.
245
00:09:40,671 --> 00:09:42,621
- Another remark like
that and you could lose
246
00:09:42,621 --> 00:09:44,339
the only friend you have.
247
00:09:44,339 --> 00:09:46,058
(bell dings)
248
00:09:46,058 --> 00:09:48,496
- Opening time. Stand by for the stampede.
249
00:09:48,496 --> 00:09:49,506
- Time Mr. Lucas.
250
00:09:49,506 --> 00:09:50,704
- Yes of course, Captain Peacock,
251
00:09:50,704 --> 00:09:51,899
anything in particular sir.
252
00:09:51,899 --> 00:09:55,028
- Straighten your tie, Mr. Lucas.
253
00:09:55,028 --> 00:09:56,195
- Oh, yes sir.
254
00:09:57,623 --> 00:09:59,829
- One pencil is sufficient.
255
00:09:59,829 --> 00:10:01,746
- Yes, Captain Peacock.
256
00:10:02,986 --> 00:10:06,388
Shall I keep the HB or the special soft?
257
00:10:06,388 --> 00:10:08,257
- If you were troubled to read
the memo from the accounts
258
00:10:08,257 --> 00:10:11,299
department, you would know
that they prefer ball points.
259
00:10:11,299 --> 00:10:12,344
Correct Mr. Humphries?
260
00:10:12,344 --> 00:10:13,830
- Ball points, Captain Peacock.
261
00:10:13,830 --> 00:10:16,080
(laughter)
262
00:10:17,987 --> 00:10:19,391
- Actually I did have a
ball point, but I was always
263
00:10:19,391 --> 00:10:21,423
getting ticked off, because
I kept getting blue streaks
264
00:10:21,423 --> 00:10:23,071
on me white handkerchief, you see.
265
00:10:23,071 --> 00:10:26,263
- Possibly a retractable pen
would solve your problems.
266
00:10:26,263 --> 00:10:28,422
- Oh that's very nice, sir.
267
00:10:28,422 --> 00:10:31,184
- You can get them from the stationery.
268
00:10:31,184 --> 00:10:32,392
You get a staff discount.
269
00:10:32,392 --> 00:10:33,472
- Yes sir.
270
00:10:33,472 --> 00:10:36,107
- And by the way, about that handkerchief.
271
00:10:36,107 --> 00:10:39,462
May I show you how we
do it at Grace Brothers?
272
00:10:39,462 --> 00:10:42,272
We don't just take it from the laundry,
273
00:10:42,272 --> 00:10:44,025
fold it and stuff it in.
274
00:10:44,025 --> 00:10:44,942
- Don't we?
275
00:10:46,149 --> 00:10:47,624
- No.
276
00:10:47,624 --> 00:10:48,957
- What do we do?
277
00:10:50,945 --> 00:10:51,827
Oh, excuse me.
278
00:10:51,827 --> 00:10:53,327
- Don't interrupt.
279
00:10:55,461 --> 00:10:56,711
We place it so.
280
00:10:57,864 --> 00:11:01,429
We then take it in the middle like so.
281
00:11:01,429 --> 00:11:02,679
We flute it so.
282
00:11:06,142 --> 00:11:08,475
We bend over the bottom, so.
283
00:11:09,544 --> 00:11:11,294
And tuck it back, so.
284
00:11:13,584 --> 00:11:16,251
The effect is casual, but smart.
285
00:11:17,984 --> 00:11:19,751
- It sets the pen off nicely too.
286
00:11:19,751 --> 00:11:21,145
(laughter)
287
00:11:21,145 --> 00:11:22,422
- Well do it.
288
00:11:22,422 --> 00:11:24,005
- Ah, yes, yes sir.
289
00:11:28,586 --> 00:11:31,512
- Take it from the center
or as near to the center
290
00:11:31,512 --> 00:11:32,762
as you can get.
291
00:11:35,785 --> 00:11:36,667
Flute it.
292
00:11:36,667 --> 00:11:38,304
- Flute it.
293
00:11:38,304 --> 00:11:40,626
(laughter)
294
00:11:40,626 --> 00:11:42,684
- Bend over the bottom.
295
00:11:42,684 --> 00:11:44,341
- Bend over the bottom.
296
00:11:44,341 --> 00:11:46,187
- And tuck it.
297
00:11:46,187 --> 00:11:47,020
- Tuck it.
298
00:11:53,025 --> 00:11:56,108
- Good. That's much better. Carry on.
299
00:11:57,147 --> 00:11:58,784
- What a bloody palaver.
300
00:11:58,784 --> 00:12:00,061
(laughter)
301
00:12:00,061 --> 00:12:02,070
- You must admit, it
does look rather smart.
302
00:12:02,070 --> 00:12:03,184
- Well I suppose it does.
303
00:12:03,184 --> 00:12:04,577
- Especially if it's on cardboard.
304
00:12:04,577 --> 00:12:07,503
(laughter)
305
00:12:07,503 --> 00:12:09,430
- How long did you say
you'd been with this firm?
306
00:12:09,430 --> 00:12:10,263
Ten years is it?
307
00:12:10,263 --> 00:12:11,543
I mean how'd you manage to put up with it?
308
00:12:11,543 --> 00:12:13,343
- You just have to smile
and grit your teeth.
309
00:12:13,343 --> 00:12:14,992
This is the second set I've had this year.
310
00:12:14,992 --> 00:12:16,698
(laughter)
311
00:12:16,698 --> 00:12:18,823
I like it much better
than where I was before.
312
00:12:18,823 --> 00:12:21,307
I was in tools, paint and hardware.
313
00:12:21,307 --> 00:12:23,943
You meet a much nicer class
of person at Grace Brothers.
314
00:12:23,943 --> 00:12:25,301
- Not many of them do you?
315
00:12:25,301 --> 00:12:26,753
- Well who wants to buy
a suit at nine o'clock
316
00:12:26,753 --> 00:12:27,693
on a Monday morning?
317
00:12:27,693 --> 00:12:29,469
- That fellow does.
318
00:12:29,469 --> 00:12:31,025
Let me serve him.
319
00:12:31,025 --> 00:12:32,453
I didn't make any commission last Friday.
320
00:12:32,453 --> 00:12:34,148
- You sold that 38 long.
321
00:12:34,148 --> 00:12:35,669
- I know, but the man
brought it back again.
322
00:12:35,669 --> 00:12:36,910
His wife didn't like
it, it didn't fit her.
323
00:12:36,910 --> 00:12:38,308
Go on please, let me have it.
324
00:12:38,308 --> 00:12:39,701
- It's Grainger's first.
325
00:12:39,701 --> 00:12:41,582
- Well he hasn't seen
him. I'm gonna serve him.
326
00:12:41,582 --> 00:12:43,149
- Well don't mess it up.
327
00:12:43,149 --> 00:12:44,461
- Good morning sir, are you being served?
328
00:12:44,461 --> 00:12:45,294
- Uh no.
329
00:12:45,294 --> 00:12:46,852
- Then perhaps I could interest
you sir in an overcoat, sir,
330
00:12:46,852 --> 00:12:47,685
what do you think?
331
00:12:47,685 --> 00:12:48,902
This type of overcoat
right here is ideal for our
332
00:12:48,902 --> 00:12:50,586
present inclement weather
that we're having sir.
333
00:12:50,586 --> 00:12:52,792
Now of course it looks
like tweed, but in fact,
334
00:12:52,792 --> 00:12:54,752
it has been macatexed,
335
00:12:54,752 --> 00:12:57,991
which means that it is
almost entirely waterproof.
336
00:12:57,991 --> 00:12:59,547
What size are you sir?
337
00:12:59,547 --> 00:13:01,625
- Well as a matter of fact,
I was looking for the gents.
338
00:13:01,625 --> 00:13:04,469
(laughter)
339
00:13:04,469 --> 00:13:07,590
- In that case, size doesn't
really come into it does it?
340
00:13:07,590 --> 00:13:08,423
It's over there.
341
00:13:08,423 --> 00:13:09,423
- Thank you.
342
00:13:13,822 --> 00:13:14,704
- Mr. Lucas.
343
00:13:14,704 --> 00:13:15,551
- Yes.
344
00:13:15,551 --> 00:13:17,662
- If you would've allowed Mr.
Humphries or myself to deal
345
00:13:17,662 --> 00:13:20,217
with that customer, we
might've made a sale.
346
00:13:20,217 --> 00:13:21,111
What did he want?
347
00:13:21,111 --> 00:13:21,944
- The gents.
348
00:13:21,944 --> 00:13:23,044
- The gents' what?
349
00:13:23,044 --> 00:13:25,060
- The gents gents.
350
00:13:25,060 --> 00:13:26,697
- Oh must be raining again.
351
00:13:26,697 --> 00:13:29,391
(laughter)
352
00:13:29,391 --> 00:13:32,305
They always come in when it's raining.
353
00:13:32,305 --> 00:13:34,871
Well now get behind your counter,
354
00:13:34,871 --> 00:13:38,505
because young Mr. Grace will
be coming in any minute.
355
00:13:38,505 --> 00:13:39,584
- Who?
356
00:13:39,584 --> 00:13:42,464
- Young Mr. Grace, the chairman.
357
00:13:42,464 --> 00:13:45,620
Yes, he'll be coming in, he
always comes in the first Monday
358
00:13:45,620 --> 00:13:46,537
of the month.
359
00:13:46,537 --> 00:13:47,431
- Yes sir.
360
00:13:47,431 --> 00:13:50,181
- Right and clear up that litter.
361
00:13:52,413 --> 00:13:54,330
- Clear up that litter.
362
00:13:57,788 --> 00:13:58,984
Hello.
363
00:13:58,984 --> 00:14:00,029
- What's that?
364
00:14:00,029 --> 00:14:02,026
- Blue cinema club.
365
00:14:02,026 --> 00:14:04,069
- I shouldn't have though
a young virile gentleman
366
00:14:04,069 --> 00:14:06,413
like yourself needed
that sort of stimulation.
367
00:14:06,413 --> 00:14:08,979
- It's not mine. It fell out
of Captain Peacock's pocket.
368
00:14:08,979 --> 00:14:12,056
- It didn't. Let me have a look.
369
00:14:12,056 --> 00:14:15,225
Oh, member's signature,
Captain John Smith.
370
00:14:15,225 --> 00:14:16,058
(laughs)
371
00:14:16,058 --> 00:14:18,952
Captain John Smith. That's him all right.
372
00:14:18,952 --> 00:14:20,670
I wondered why he brought
that brown rain coat
373
00:14:20,670 --> 00:14:22,029
in the sale.
374
00:14:22,029 --> 00:14:23,944
- I better give it to him.
375
00:14:23,944 --> 00:14:26,220
- That'll be the last thing you do.
376
00:14:26,220 --> 00:14:27,053
- What do you mean?
377
00:14:27,053 --> 00:14:28,670
- Well if he knows that you
know that he goes sitting
378
00:14:28,670 --> 00:14:31,387
in that little cinema, where
there's no room for your legs
379
00:14:31,387 --> 00:14:32,870
and they always have their
mac's over their knees.
380
00:14:32,870 --> 00:14:35,192
- How do you know what it looks like?
381
00:14:35,192 --> 00:14:38,338
- My doctor sent me there for therapy.
382
00:14:38,338 --> 00:14:40,613
(laughter)
383
00:14:40,613 --> 00:14:41,446
- Did it work?
384
00:14:41,446 --> 00:14:43,992
- That's none of your business.
385
00:14:43,992 --> 00:14:45,141
- Well what are we gonna do?
386
00:14:45,141 --> 00:14:46,186
- We are going to do nothing.
387
00:14:46,186 --> 00:14:47,545
You leave it there. He'll see it.
388
00:14:47,545 --> 00:14:50,308
He's got eyes like a
Scandinavian mountain hawk.
389
00:14:50,308 --> 00:14:51,910
We'll pretend we haven't seen it.
390
00:14:51,910 --> 00:14:53,942
- Now then, I don't want
anybody to go to coffee until
391
00:14:53,942 --> 00:14:55,823
young Mr. Grace the chairman
comes through on his way
392
00:14:55,823 --> 00:14:56,902
to the executive suite.
393
00:14:56,902 --> 00:14:59,652
- Of course not, Captain Peacock.
394
00:15:02,266 --> 00:15:04,669
(laughter)
395
00:15:04,669 --> 00:15:06,469
I understand that Mr. Grace
comes in on every Monday morning
396
00:15:06,469 --> 00:15:08,512
of the first Monday of every month sir.
397
00:15:08,512 --> 00:15:12,100
- Quite right Mr. Smith, uh Lucas.
398
00:15:12,100 --> 00:15:14,224
- I am looking forward to seeing him, sir.
399
00:15:14,224 --> 00:15:18,253
- We're all looking forward to seeing him.
400
00:15:18,253 --> 00:15:20,036
And you remember how to flute yours?
401
00:15:20,036 --> 00:15:21,267
- Oh yes sir.
402
00:15:21,267 --> 00:15:24,267
- Well I'll just show you once more.
403
00:15:35,266 --> 00:15:37,516
(laughter)
404
00:15:39,631 --> 00:15:41,547
Is that clear?
405
00:15:41,547 --> 00:15:43,130
- Casual but smart.
406
00:15:43,985 --> 00:15:45,703
- Just like a conjuring trick.
407
00:15:45,703 --> 00:15:48,350
(laughter)
408
00:15:48,350 --> 00:15:50,788
- Yes, well carry on.
409
00:15:50,788 --> 00:15:51,822
- Hello, here he is.
410
00:15:51,822 --> 00:15:52,655
- Who?
411
00:15:52,655 --> 00:15:53,865
- Young Mr. Grace.
412
00:15:53,865 --> 00:15:55,831
(laughter)
413
00:15:55,831 --> 00:15:56,664
- Morning.
414
00:15:59,916 --> 00:16:01,702
- Young Mr. Grace?
415
00:16:01,702 --> 00:16:04,547
- Old Mr. Grace doesn't get
about very much these days.
416
00:16:04,547 --> 00:16:07,464
- It runs in the family doesn't it?
417
00:16:08,348 --> 00:16:09,671
- Morning. Morning.
418
00:16:09,671 --> 00:16:11,425
- [Mrs. Slocombe] Good morning.
419
00:16:11,425 --> 00:16:13,049
- Morning. Morning.
420
00:16:13,049 --> 00:16:14,755
- [Mr. Grainger] Good morning sir.
421
00:16:14,755 --> 00:16:17,172
- Good morning. Good morning.
422
00:16:18,316 --> 00:16:20,588
- [Mr. Lucas] Good morning.
423
00:16:20,588 --> 00:16:22,666
- Good morning.
424
00:16:22,666 --> 00:16:23,862
- He's worth two million.
425
00:16:23,862 --> 00:16:24,744
- Two million?
426
00:16:24,744 --> 00:16:25,789
- He can't take it with him.
427
00:16:25,789 --> 00:16:26,822
- The way he's walking, it looks at though
428
00:16:26,822 --> 00:16:27,751
he's carrying it on his back.
429
00:16:27,751 --> 00:16:29,783
(laughter)
430
00:16:29,783 --> 00:16:30,616
- Morning.
431
00:16:30,616 --> 00:16:31,866
- Good morning.
432
00:16:35,662 --> 00:16:36,702
- Your receipt is inside.
433
00:16:36,702 --> 00:16:39,221
Thank you so much, good morning.
434
00:16:39,221 --> 00:16:40,382
- Good morning.
435
00:16:40,382 --> 00:16:41,215
- Oh Miss Brahms.
436
00:16:41,215 --> 00:16:42,048
- Yes.
437
00:16:42,048 --> 00:16:44,706
- I want you to pop over
and ask Mr. Humphries
438
00:16:44,706 --> 00:16:48,468
if he'd mind removing his
shirts from this center stand.
439
00:16:48,468 --> 00:16:51,103
I want to put our strapless bras up there.
440
00:16:51,103 --> 00:16:52,102
- Yes Mrs. Slocombe.
441
00:16:52,102 --> 00:16:54,342
- And don't get delayed by that Mr. Lucas.
442
00:16:54,342 --> 00:16:55,175
- No.
443
00:16:55,175 --> 00:16:57,152
- And don't forget to
mention all these trousers.
444
00:16:57,152 --> 00:16:57,985
- Fine.
445
00:16:59,985 --> 00:17:02,551
Are you free Mr. Humphries?
446
00:17:02,551 --> 00:17:04,304
- At the moment, yes.
447
00:17:04,304 --> 00:17:05,137
- Good.
448
00:17:05,137 --> 00:17:07,145
Mrs. Slocombe asked me to
ask you if you wouldn't mind
449
00:17:07,145 --> 00:17:09,827
removing your shirts in
the center display stand.
450
00:17:09,827 --> 00:17:10,744
- Remove my shirts?
451
00:17:10,744 --> 00:17:11,577
Whatever for?
452
00:17:11,577 --> 00:17:13,391
- Well she wants to put
her strapless bras there.
453
00:17:13,391 --> 00:17:15,457
Oh yes, and there's the trousers as well.
454
00:17:15,457 --> 00:17:17,628
- I'm sorry, my dear. That's
more than my job's worth.
455
00:17:17,628 --> 00:17:19,335
You'll have to take it
up with Mr. Grainger.
456
00:17:19,335 --> 00:17:20,949
They're his trousers, anyway.
457
00:17:20,949 --> 00:17:24,949
- Thank you Mr. Humphries
for being so obliging.
458
00:17:26,266 --> 00:17:27,230
- She's got a nerve.
459
00:17:27,230 --> 00:17:28,063
- What's the matter now?
460
00:17:28,063 --> 00:17:30,945
- She wants to remove my shirt
and put a bra there instead.
461
00:17:30,945 --> 00:17:33,302
- Just you or all of us.
462
00:17:33,302 --> 00:17:37,098
- Don't worry about the
sleeves sir, they'll ride up
463
00:17:37,098 --> 00:17:37,931
with wear.
464
00:17:38,944 --> 00:17:43,832
If they don't, do bring them
back and this is yours, sir.
465
00:17:43,832 --> 00:17:45,582
Good day to you, sir.
466
00:17:46,781 --> 00:17:49,591
Oh, are you being served madam?
467
00:17:49,591 --> 00:17:52,110
- No, I'm Mrs. Slocombe's
assistant, Miss Brahms.
468
00:17:52,110 --> 00:17:53,110
- Oh indeed.
469
00:17:54,142 --> 00:17:56,429
- Yes she asked me to ask you
if you'd mind if Mr. Humphries
470
00:17:56,429 --> 00:17:58,983
took the shirts down
from the center display.
471
00:17:58,983 --> 00:18:02,745
- Take the shirts down
from the center display?
472
00:18:02,745 --> 00:18:05,299
- Yes, she wants to put her bras there.
473
00:18:05,299 --> 00:18:06,704
- Her brass what?
474
00:18:06,704 --> 00:18:08,353
(laughter)
475
00:18:08,353 --> 00:18:10,187
- No, her bras.
476
00:18:10,187 --> 00:18:12,335
Oh yes, and there's the trousers as well.
477
00:18:12,335 --> 00:18:14,192
- I beg your pardon?
478
00:18:14,192 --> 00:18:16,944
- Mrs. Slocombe didn't like
to take down your trousers
479
00:18:16,944 --> 00:18:19,027
without asking you first.
480
00:18:21,054 --> 00:18:24,189
- I think that if Mrs. Slocombe
wants to make any further
481
00:18:24,189 --> 00:18:27,381
inroads into my department, she had better
482
00:18:27,381 --> 00:18:29,216
inform me personally.
483
00:18:29,216 --> 00:18:30,783
- Right, well I'll tell her,
you'll come across then.
484
00:18:30,783 --> 00:18:33,546
- On the contrary, she
can come and see me.
485
00:18:33,546 --> 00:18:34,546
- Very well.
486
00:18:38,550 --> 00:18:40,384
- She did ask me first, Mr. Grainger,
487
00:18:40,384 --> 00:18:42,068
but of course, I sent
her straight over to you.
488
00:18:42,068 --> 00:18:43,867
- You're quite right, indeed.
489
00:18:43,867 --> 00:18:44,866
- I hope I did the right thing.
490
00:18:44,866 --> 00:18:47,072
- You certainly did.
491
00:18:47,072 --> 00:18:48,825
- I hope I did the right
thing, Mrs. Slocombe.
492
00:18:48,825 --> 00:18:50,950
- You did Miss Brahms.
493
00:18:50,950 --> 00:18:52,784
I'll soon sort him out.
494
00:18:52,784 --> 00:18:54,746
He'll feel the rough edge of me tongue.
495
00:18:54,746 --> 00:18:57,544
- Yes, well do be careful Mrs. Slocombe.
496
00:18:57,544 --> 00:18:59,065
- Round two, Mrs. Slocombe
comes out of her corner
497
00:18:59,065 --> 00:19:00,423
on her two flat feet.
498
00:19:00,423 --> 00:19:02,060
(laughter)
499
00:19:02,060 --> 00:19:03,465
- Good morning, Mr. Grainger.
500
00:19:03,465 --> 00:19:04,429
- Morning.
501
00:19:04,429 --> 00:19:05,532
- Are you free?
502
00:19:05,532 --> 00:19:07,749
- Uh, yes, I'm free.
503
00:19:07,749 --> 00:19:10,187
- I understand that there's
been a little misunderstanding
504
00:19:10,187 --> 00:19:12,068
regarding the center stand.
505
00:19:12,068 --> 00:19:13,148
- Not at all.
506
00:19:13,148 --> 00:19:16,271
That stand has been the focal
point of our sales display
507
00:19:16,271 --> 00:19:20,149
since the advent of Oxford
banks and it is going to stay
508
00:19:20,149 --> 00:19:21,217
that way.
509
00:19:21,217 --> 00:19:23,469
- Oh, that isn't what I
understood when I agreed
510
00:19:23,469 --> 00:19:25,269
to share my department with you.
511
00:19:25,269 --> 00:19:28,380
- May I remind you, that
I am not sharing with you.
512
00:19:28,380 --> 00:19:30,296
You are sharing with me.
513
00:19:30,296 --> 00:19:31,376
- Well what's the difference?
514
00:19:31,376 --> 00:19:34,301
- The difference, Mrs.
Slocombe, is that you're
515
00:19:34,301 --> 00:19:36,634
not going to get that stand.
516
00:19:37,668 --> 00:19:39,189
- I see.
517
00:19:39,189 --> 00:19:42,103
Well I shall have to go over your head,
518
00:19:42,103 --> 00:19:44,936
which won't be all that difficult.
519
00:19:47,455 --> 00:19:48,860
- Can I get you a glass
of water, Mr. Grainger.
520
00:19:48,860 --> 00:19:49,693
- Yes.
521
00:19:49,693 --> 00:19:51,147
- A glass of water for Mr. Grainger.
522
00:19:51,147 --> 00:19:52,471
Let the cold tap run.
523
00:19:52,471 --> 00:19:54,721
(laughter)
524
00:19:56,233 --> 00:19:59,529
- Are you free Captain Peacock?
525
00:19:59,529 --> 00:20:01,279
- At the moment, yes.
526
00:20:02,142 --> 00:20:05,068
- Well, it's like this Captain Peacock,
527
00:20:05,068 --> 00:20:07,703
when I agreed to move
my department down here,
528
00:20:07,703 --> 00:20:09,712
I understood that I was
to have proper display
529
00:20:09,712 --> 00:20:11,229
facilities.
530
00:20:11,229 --> 00:20:14,027
Well I've just asked, very politely,
531
00:20:14,027 --> 00:20:17,823
asked Mr. Grainger to accommodate
me on the center stand.
532
00:20:17,823 --> 00:20:19,704
And he as good as told me to get stuffed.
533
00:20:19,704 --> 00:20:22,305
(laugther)
534
00:20:22,305 --> 00:20:24,023
- That doesn't sound
like our Mr. Grainger.
535
00:20:24,023 --> 00:20:25,672
- Oh well, those weren't his exact words,
536
00:20:25,672 --> 00:20:27,262
but that's what he implied.
537
00:20:27,262 --> 00:20:29,387
- Well now what do you expect
me to do, Mrs. Slocombe?
538
00:20:29,387 --> 00:20:33,381
- Well, I thought that as
you were in command here,
539
00:20:33,381 --> 00:20:35,471
you'd tell him where he got off.
540
00:20:35,471 --> 00:20:38,663
- Well you must understand
Mrs. Slocombe that...
541
00:20:38,663 --> 00:20:40,413
- Oh come now, Betty.
542
00:20:41,784 --> 00:20:42,617
- Betty.
543
00:20:43,946 --> 00:20:46,187
As I was saying, you must
understand Mrs. Slocombe,
544
00:20:46,187 --> 00:20:49,577
that Mr. Grainger has been
here a very very long time.
545
00:20:49,577 --> 00:20:51,411
- Then it's time he went.
546
00:20:51,411 --> 00:20:53,513
- It's hardly your place to decide that.
547
00:20:53,513 --> 00:20:54,790
- Do you mean you're
just going to stand there
548
00:20:54,790 --> 00:20:56,671
and let him walk all over me?
549
00:20:56,671 --> 00:20:58,064
- I don't think there's
much danger of that.
550
00:20:58,064 --> 00:21:00,026
(laughs)
551
00:21:00,026 --> 00:21:02,777
- What are you going to do?
552
00:21:02,777 --> 00:21:04,066
- I shall go and have a word with him
553
00:21:04,066 --> 00:21:05,738
and hear his side of it.
554
00:21:05,738 --> 00:21:07,897
- But I told you his side of it.
555
00:21:07,897 --> 00:21:10,312
- You must leave this to me Mrs. Slocombe.
556
00:21:10,312 --> 00:21:12,729
- Very well, Captain Peacock.
557
00:21:16,616 --> 00:21:17,449
- What'd he say?
558
00:21:17,449 --> 00:21:19,229
- Oh he's as weak as water.
559
00:21:19,229 --> 00:21:20,506
Weak as water, he is.
560
00:21:20,506 --> 00:21:21,673
Weak as water.
561
00:21:22,944 --> 00:21:24,905
Anyway, he's taking it hard.
562
00:21:24,905 --> 00:21:26,832
- Oh, I bet you twisted him
around your little finger.
563
00:21:26,832 --> 00:21:29,999
- Oh, well after all, he's only a man.
564
00:21:31,151 --> 00:21:34,345
- There there Mr. Grainger,
now you mustn't upset yourself.
565
00:21:34,345 --> 00:21:36,098
We're right behind you,
aren't we Mr. Lucas.
566
00:21:36,098 --> 00:21:37,027
_ Oh right up to the hilt.
567
00:21:37,027 --> 00:21:38,792
- Thank you Mr. Humphries.
568
00:21:38,792 --> 00:21:39,941
Thank you Mr. Lucas.
569
00:21:39,941 --> 00:21:42,941
- It's been a pleasure Mr. Grainger.
570
00:21:43,947 --> 00:21:45,789
- Now he's coming over. Don't give in.
571
00:21:45,789 --> 00:21:47,669
- Oh I won't.
572
00:21:47,669 --> 00:21:49,748
- Yes hello Captain.
573
00:21:49,748 --> 00:21:52,104
- It's very quiet this
morning, Mr. Grainger.
574
00:21:52,104 --> 00:21:54,229
- Yes, very very quiet.
575
00:21:54,229 --> 00:21:55,413
- Very quiet indeed.
576
00:21:55,413 --> 00:21:57,469
Mr. Lucas and I were just
remarking how quiet it was,
577
00:21:57,469 --> 00:21:58,302
weren't we Mr. Lucas.
578
00:21:58,302 --> 00:22:00,708
- Oh yes, very quiet, very
quiet, yes, very quiet.
579
00:22:00,708 --> 00:22:02,705
I think things might liven
up in a minute or two though.
580
00:22:02,705 --> 00:22:04,342
(laughter)
581
00:22:04,342 --> 00:22:06,629
- If you're free, Mr.
Grainger, I'd like a word.
582
00:22:06,629 --> 00:22:09,067
- Oh yes, I think I'm free, yes.
583
00:22:09,067 --> 00:22:12,307
Take over will you Mr. Humphries.
584
00:22:12,307 --> 00:22:14,153
I'm going to have a word
with Captain Peacock.
585
00:22:14,153 --> 00:22:15,534
- Yes of course.
586
00:22:15,534 --> 00:22:17,624
- Would you like me to take
over from you Mr. Humphries.
587
00:22:17,624 --> 00:22:19,029
- No, get over there,
and see if you can hear
588
00:22:19,029 --> 00:22:19,911
what they're saying.
589
00:22:19,911 --> 00:22:21,734
(laughter)
590
00:22:21,734 --> 00:22:24,590
- I've just been having a
word with Mrs. Slocombe.
591
00:22:24,590 --> 00:22:25,832
- So have I.
592
00:22:25,832 --> 00:22:28,061
- Mmmm. A very difficult woman, Ernest.
593
00:22:28,061 --> 00:22:30,438
- Yes, most of them are.
594
00:22:30,438 --> 00:22:32,752
- Yes, I'm in a very awkward
position, you understand.
595
00:22:32,752 --> 00:22:35,271
I'm mean I'm under fire from both sides.
596
00:22:35,271 --> 00:22:37,872
- Well look here Stephen, you
and I have known each other
597
00:22:37,872 --> 00:22:39,462
for many years.
598
00:22:39,462 --> 00:22:42,063
You know that I would
do anything in my power
599
00:22:42,063 --> 00:22:43,563
to smooth the way.
600
00:22:44,548 --> 00:22:45,511
- Thank you Ernest.
601
00:22:45,511 --> 00:22:48,298
- Short of giving her that stand.
602
00:22:48,298 --> 00:22:50,298
- You're not gettin' it.
603
00:22:51,943 --> 00:22:53,627
- We're not getting it.
604
00:22:53,627 --> 00:22:54,460
- I see.
605
00:23:03,425 --> 00:23:05,079
(laughter)
606
00:23:05,079 --> 00:23:07,996
Nevil, get me Mr. Rumbold's office.
607
00:23:09,032 --> 00:23:11,864
Hello, could I speak
with Mr. Rumbold please.
608
00:23:11,864 --> 00:23:13,223
- Well I'm sorry Mrs. Slocombe,
609
00:23:13,223 --> 00:23:14,628
but I'm afraid Mr. Rumbold's still with
610
00:23:14,628 --> 00:23:16,984
young Mr. Grace at the moment.
611
00:23:16,984 --> 00:23:20,984
Oh, hang on a second, I
think he's just leaving.
612
00:23:23,312 --> 00:23:24,145
- Morning.
613
00:23:24,145 --> 00:23:24,978
- Good morning.
614
00:23:24,978 --> 00:23:26,551
- Morning.
615
00:23:26,551 --> 00:23:27,801
- Good morning.
616
00:23:30,101 --> 00:23:32,351
(laughter)
617
00:23:33,351 --> 00:23:35,430
Well that was a short day, wasn't it?
618
00:23:35,430 --> 00:23:37,903
- I don't know, he's put in ten minutes.
619
00:23:37,903 --> 00:23:38,736
I wonder where he's going.
620
00:23:38,736 --> 00:23:39,868
- I'd say it's a toss up between the bank
621
00:23:39,868 --> 00:23:40,710
and the undertaker.
622
00:23:40,710 --> 00:23:42,960
(laughter)
623
00:23:43,902 --> 00:23:46,569
I'll build a stairway to heaven.
624
00:23:48,186 --> 00:23:50,706
Come on Sir Edmund, come on Sir Edmund
625
00:23:50,706 --> 00:23:53,206
you're doing great there, boy.
626
00:23:54,270 --> 00:23:56,824
- You've all done very well.
627
00:23:56,824 --> 00:23:57,822
- [All] Thank you.
628
00:23:57,822 --> 00:24:00,072
(laughter)
629
00:24:01,352 --> 00:24:03,825
- Does that mean we can all go home?
630
00:24:03,825 --> 00:24:05,787
- You're through now Mrs. Slocombe.
631
00:24:05,787 --> 00:24:07,064
- Oh thank you.
632
00:24:07,064 --> 00:24:09,583
Mr. Rumbold, I'm sorry to trouble you,
633
00:24:09,583 --> 00:24:12,904
but I have a rather
serious complaint to make.
634
00:24:12,904 --> 00:24:14,030
- She's phoning Rumbold.
635
00:24:14,030 --> 00:24:15,226
She's going over my head.
636
00:24:15,226 --> 00:24:17,792
- She's already been over mine.
637
00:24:17,792 --> 00:24:20,950
- Well I've heard both sides of the story.
638
00:24:20,950 --> 00:24:23,666
I appreciate your points
about your brassieres,
639
00:24:23,666 --> 00:24:27,625
Mrs. Slocombe, but you must realize that
640
00:24:27,625 --> 00:24:30,702
that stand has been the
focal point of Mr. Grainger's
641
00:24:30,702 --> 00:24:33,152
trousers for the last 25 years.
642
00:24:33,152 --> 00:24:35,402
(laughter)
643
00:24:37,111 --> 00:24:40,656
We must all pull together
and make the machine
644
00:24:40,656 --> 00:24:42,076
run smoothly, hmmm?
645
00:24:42,076 --> 00:24:42,942
- Here, here.
646
00:24:42,942 --> 00:24:43,775
- [Mr. Rumbold] Hmmm?
647
00:24:43,775 --> 00:24:44,608
- Here, here.
648
00:24:44,608 --> 00:24:45,441
- [Mr. Rumbold] Hmmm?
649
00:24:45,441 --> 00:24:46,274
- Here, here, too but what are we going
650
00:24:46,274 --> 00:24:47,268
to do about it?
651
00:24:47,268 --> 00:24:48,615
- Well it's very difficult.
652
00:24:48,615 --> 00:24:50,066
- It's not at all easy for you sir,
653
00:24:50,066 --> 00:24:51,146
being Solomon is it?
654
00:24:51,146 --> 00:24:52,471
- No indeed it isn't Captain Peacock.
655
00:24:52,471 --> 00:24:54,627
- Nobody's cutting a baby in half.
656
00:24:54,627 --> 00:24:55,811
- What baby?
657
00:24:55,811 --> 00:24:58,575
- That's what Solomon did, Mr. Rumbold.
658
00:24:58,575 --> 00:24:59,408
- Did he?
659
00:24:59,408 --> 00:25:00,304
Whatever for?
660
00:25:00,304 --> 00:25:02,777
- As a mater of fact, sir, he didn't.
661
00:25:02,777 --> 00:25:06,214
Two women came unto
Solomon with the same baby,
662
00:25:06,214 --> 00:25:08,548
both claiming it was theirs.
663
00:25:08,548 --> 00:25:11,624
- I don't think that's
apropo, Captain Peacock.
664
00:25:11,624 --> 00:25:15,270
We are here to discuss
Mrs. Slocombe displaying
665
00:25:15,270 --> 00:25:16,466
her underwear.
666
00:25:16,466 --> 00:25:18,068
(laughter)
667
00:25:18,068 --> 00:25:20,308
- And furthermore, I don't
happen to have a baby.
668
00:25:20,308 --> 00:25:21,945
And if I did have a baby,
it would be nothing to do
669
00:25:21,945 --> 00:25:24,871
with whether I have my
underwear up or not.
670
00:25:24,871 --> 00:25:27,867
- No one's suggested you did have a baby.
671
00:25:27,867 --> 00:25:29,863
- I don't happen to be married.
672
00:25:29,863 --> 00:25:31,187
At the moment.
673
00:25:31,187 --> 00:25:33,381
- Well it's not unheard
of these days, you know.
674
00:25:33,381 --> 00:25:35,622
- What's not unheard of?
675
00:25:35,622 --> 00:25:37,909
- Having a baby out of wedlock.
676
00:25:37,909 --> 00:25:40,022
- Look what's me not
having a baby got to do
677
00:25:40,022 --> 00:25:42,182
with him not taking his trousers down?
678
00:25:42,182 --> 00:25:44,432
(laughter)
679
00:25:46,025 --> 00:25:47,824
- They've been at it
for two hours in there.
680
00:25:47,824 --> 00:25:49,589
- I know. I wonder what's going to happen?
681
00:25:49,589 --> 00:25:51,224
- They're probably going
to take it to Vic Feather.
682
00:25:51,224 --> 00:25:53,093
(laughter)
683
00:25:53,093 --> 00:25:54,343
Here they come.
684
00:25:58,503 --> 00:26:00,547
- Mr. Humphries, if you're free.
685
00:26:00,547 --> 00:26:02,714
Miss Brahms gather 'round.
686
00:26:04,297 --> 00:26:06,863
Mr. Lucas, are you free?
687
00:26:06,863 --> 00:26:07,745
- I'm free.
688
00:26:07,745 --> 00:26:10,055
(laughter)
689
00:26:10,055 --> 00:26:11,309
- Come a little closer, we
don't want the customers
690
00:26:11,309 --> 00:26:12,142
to hear.
691
00:26:12,142 --> 00:26:12,975
- You'd have to shout.
692
00:26:12,975 --> 00:26:14,548
(laughter)
693
00:26:14,548 --> 00:26:18,182
- Well then gentlemen and ladies,
Mrs. Slocombe has referred
694
00:26:18,182 --> 00:26:21,143
the matter of the center
display to Mr. Rumbold,
695
00:26:21,143 --> 00:26:23,546
who took the view I think quite rightly
696
00:26:23,546 --> 00:26:26,588
that it should continue
under Mr. Grainger's command,
697
00:26:26,588 --> 00:26:29,944
where he can continue to
deploy his shirts and trousers
698
00:26:29,944 --> 00:26:31,186
as he thinks fit.
699
00:26:31,186 --> 00:26:32,823
- Oh well done, Mr. Grainger.
700
00:26:32,823 --> 00:26:34,065
- Thank you Mr. Humphries.
701
00:26:34,065 --> 00:26:36,144
- Well done Mr. Humphries.
702
00:26:36,144 --> 00:26:39,151
- Does that mean, we can't
have even one bra up there?
703
00:26:39,151 --> 00:26:40,346
- What do you think?
704
00:26:40,346 --> 00:26:42,750
It's a man's world, isn't it?
705
00:26:42,750 --> 00:26:46,662
- Captain Peacock, now
that I have, as it were,
706
00:26:46,662 --> 00:26:49,182
won the day, I feel that in the interest
707
00:26:49,182 --> 00:26:53,187
of interdepartmental
relations I might just see
708
00:26:53,187 --> 00:26:57,354
my way perhaps to giving
Mrs. Slocombe a small foot
709
00:26:58,621 --> 00:26:59,621
in my stand.
710
00:27:00,792 --> 00:27:02,870
Shall we say, one bra?
711
00:27:02,870 --> 00:27:04,704
- Why not, I mean half
a bra would be better
712
00:27:04,704 --> 00:27:06,097
than no bra at al, wouldn't it.
713
00:27:06,097 --> 00:27:07,351
(laughter)
714
00:27:07,351 --> 00:27:10,904
- Oh that's too generous
of you, Mr. Grainger.
715
00:27:10,904 --> 00:27:12,459
- Do you accept Mrs. Slocombe?
716
00:27:12,459 --> 00:27:14,630
- Of course I do, Captain Peacock.
717
00:27:14,630 --> 00:27:16,320
- Well, everything's settled amicably.
718
00:27:16,320 --> 00:27:17,992
- Thank god for that.
719
00:27:17,992 --> 00:27:19,907
- I knew the very thing.
720
00:27:19,907 --> 00:27:22,157
(laughter)
721
00:27:26,072 --> 00:27:28,489
(bell dings)
722
00:27:33,712 --> 00:27:37,545
- Beregen, Grainger here,
give me Mr. Rumbold.
723
00:27:39,550 --> 00:27:42,664
(cash register dinging)
724
00:27:42,664 --> 00:27:44,867
(groovy music)
725
00:27:44,867 --> 00:27:47,700
♫ Ground floor perfumery,
stationery, leather goods
726
00:27:47,700 --> 00:27:50,383
♫ Wigs and haberdashery,
kitchenware and food
727
00:27:50,383 --> 00:27:52,633
♫ Going up
728
00:27:56,431 --> 00:27:59,577
♫ First floor telephones,
gents ready-made suits,
729
00:27:59,577 --> 00:28:03,744
♫ shirts, socks, ties, hats,
underwear and shoes...going up
730
00:28:07,908 --> 00:28:10,544
♫ Second floor carpets,
travel goods and bedding
731
00:28:10,544 --> 00:28:13,504
♫ Material, soft furnishings,
restaurant and teas
732
00:28:13,504 --> 00:28:15,921
♫ Going down
51902
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