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Buy 50,000 shares of soy bean futures
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00:00:04,013 --> 00:00:06,548
and a put option on the S&P Index
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00:00:06,616 --> 00:00:07,883
that expires at midnight.
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00:00:07,951 --> 00:00:10,351
Then dump all the inflation-protected
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00:00:10,420 --> 00:00:12,614
treasury bonds and 15-year CDs.
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00:00:13,891 --> 00:00:16,491
And then I want you
to move all that cash
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00:00:16,560 --> 00:00:17,959
into Nikkei Futures.
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00:00:18,028 --> 00:00:20,228
- Liquidate the oil, put a freeze on gas.
- [Grunts]
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00:00:20,297 --> 00:00:23,098
Transfer half my derivatives
into the high-grade portfolio!
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Transfer the other half
into the low-grade portfolio!
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Then merge those portfolios!
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00:00:27,437 --> 00:00:30,629
And we're completely clear
of Kappa Kappa Capital, right?
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00:00:30,753 --> 00:00:31,686
Great.
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Man, it is good to be alive.
15
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Oh, and don't forget shares
of Fremulon Insurance.
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That stock is on...
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00:00:40,183 --> 00:00:42,183
[Screams] On fire!
18
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[Screams]
19
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[Gunshot]
20
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21
00:00:47,457 --> 00:00:50,164
This is all that remains
of Philip Grammbbowski.
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- He was a rising star on Wall S...
- A.J.: Sorry!
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Ugh!
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Unbelievable traffic!
25
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[Door closes]
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[Yawns]
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[Cellphone clicking]
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Yaas!
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[Cellphone chimes]
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31
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Grammbbowski ran a private wealth fund
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worth $4.4 billion under management.
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Whoa. That's a lot of bread.
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Food shame much?
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He was a rising star on Wall Street
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until he was ostracized
for his bizarre ideas.
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Wait just one goddamn minute.
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We got a first name on this guy?
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Philip.
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Makes sense.
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He had everything going for him...
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white, male, rich.
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An unbeatable combination
until yesterday,
45
00:02:00,664 --> 00:02:02,263
when somebody tanned him to death.
46
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[Chuckles] Serves him right,
the greedy bastard.
47
00:02:05,478 --> 00:02:07,735
- Who the hell needs a billion dollars?
- Large countries.
48
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Well-connected political families.
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Billionaires.
50
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Because of the very large
nature of his wealth,
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the Special Division Force
is going to figure out
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who killed him and why.
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Get me some answers, people.
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00:02:19,149 --> 00:02:28,624
55
00:02:28,692 --> 00:02:38,634
56
00:02:41,705 --> 00:02:43,971
Don't bother. It's password-protected.
57
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Well, it's a good thing I'm here.
58
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Is it?
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What's your problem with me?
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You're overconfident, hubristic,
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aloof, dismissive.
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So you can say something nice.
63
00:02:54,384 --> 00:02:57,853
Now, passwords are an expression
of subconscious thoughts.
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You can hide behind it,
but I'll find you.
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00:03:00,657 --> 00:03:03,273
Talk to me, Philip. Who are you?
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00:03:03,927 --> 00:03:05,232
Chicago Cubs pennant.
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00:03:06,094 --> 00:03:07,130
Ficus plant.
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Bowl of M&Ms.
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Rothko print.
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00:03:11,979 --> 00:03:14,001
- What's the cat's name?
- Mr. Jingles.
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00:03:14,071 --> 00:03:15,871
Oh, my God! It's so obvious.
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00:03:15,939 --> 00:03:17,539
And it's written on a Post-It note
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pasted on his screen.
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00:03:18,808 --> 00:03:21,209
- 1-2-3-4-6.
- [Keyboard clacking]
75
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- That's easy to remember.
- [Computer beeps]
76
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I'm in.
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Why don't we try that folder
that says "My Documents"?
78
00:03:27,608 --> 00:03:29,496
It's a Hail Mary, but let's do it.
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00:03:30,820 --> 00:03:32,487
This is a list of Grammbbowski's clients
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00:03:32,556 --> 00:03:34,956
and what trades he's
made on their behalf.
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00:03:35,022 --> 00:03:37,019
He moved $1.4 billion
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out of something called
Kappa Kappa Capital
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00:03:38,962 --> 00:03:41,229
the day before he was killed, but why?
84
00:03:41,231 --> 00:03:43,164
It was one of his best performers.
85
00:03:43,248 --> 00:03:46,038
And what's this note by
the trade that says "saltine"?
86
00:03:46,282 --> 00:03:47,121
What is that?
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00:03:48,972 --> 00:03:50,992
Beats me. Could mean anything.
88
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89
00:03:56,580 --> 00:03:58,516
Atkins: Her name is Norrah Newt.
90
00:03:59,249 --> 00:04:01,415
Sorry, Murphy. Above your pay grade.
91
00:04:02,386 --> 00:04:05,653
Ms. Newt is... or should I say is...
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00:04:05,655 --> 00:04:08,856
a notorious vulture capitalist
and corporate raider.
93
00:04:08,926 --> 00:04:11,059
Her firm, Kappa Kappa Capital,
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00:04:11,128 --> 00:04:13,096
is famous for buying up companies,
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00:04:13,097 --> 00:04:15,396
selling them for their parts,
then buying those parts
96
00:04:15,465 --> 00:04:18,133
and putting them back together
to form the original company.
97
00:04:18,201 --> 00:04:20,068
Sounds like a real stand-up gal.
98
00:04:20,137 --> 00:04:22,003
Not since she left comedy 15 years ago
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00:04:22,072 --> 00:04:23,471
and started day-trading.
100
00:04:23,540 --> 00:04:26,408
Now her company is worth
57 billion and one dollars.
101
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That's some serious cheese.
102
00:04:28,278 --> 00:04:31,012
- It's part of my cleanse.
- We found out Grammbbowski
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00:04:31,080 --> 00:04:33,481
recently pulled nearly $1.5 billion
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00:04:33,550 --> 00:04:36,026
of his clients' money
out of Kappa Kappa Capital.
105
00:04:36,217 --> 00:04:39,220
So Newt gets her revenge by
frying Grammbbowski to a crisp.
106
00:04:39,280 --> 00:04:41,560
It's possible,
but we don't have any proof.
107
00:04:41,788 --> 00:04:43,255
That's why we're going undercover
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in the complex, aggressive
world of high finance.
109
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A.J.: With all due respect, sir,
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I'm gonna have to sit this one out.
111
00:04:48,195 --> 00:04:50,098
These Wall Street scumbags
have created an economy
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00:04:50,174 --> 00:04:51,363
that only works for the rich.
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00:04:51,364 --> 00:04:53,835
We can sing their praises all day long,
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00:04:53,903 --> 00:04:55,570
but we still have a job to do.
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00:04:55,639 --> 00:04:58,535
Our next stop is the financial
capital of the world...
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Des Moines, Iowa.
117
00:05:00,910 --> 00:05:02,177
Now, the world of finance has
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00:05:02,245 --> 00:05:04,446
changed a lot in the last 30 years.
119
00:05:04,514 --> 00:05:08,350
It's absolutely nothing like
'80s movies about Wall Street.
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00:05:08,852 --> 00:05:10,452
[Elevator bell dings]
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00:05:10,520 --> 00:05:16,792
122
00:05:16,860 --> 00:05:18,593
Hey, Tribeca. How's it going?
123
00:05:18,662 --> 00:05:20,929
Can't wait for tomorrow 'cause
I get better looking every day.
124
00:05:20,929 --> 00:05:22,130
Love the hair, by the way.
125
00:05:22,199 --> 00:05:24,199
- Flattery will get you everywhere.
- Counting on it.
126
00:05:24,267 --> 00:05:26,134
Hey, Scholls, how was
your date last night?
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00:05:26,136 --> 00:05:27,803
Are you kidding?
I took her to Mostaccioli's.
128
00:05:27,871 --> 00:05:29,805
- It was a sure thing.
- How'd you get a rez there?
129
00:05:29,873 --> 00:05:32,808
- Banged the manager.
- [Chuckles]
130
00:05:32,876 --> 00:05:35,143
131
00:05:35,212 --> 00:05:38,013
Hey, Hoffman, loving the tie.
Bill Blass?
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00:05:38,081 --> 00:05:39,414
What's happening, Charo?
133
00:05:39,483 --> 00:05:41,544
I have no reference point for this era.
134
00:05:41,951 --> 00:05:43,218
135
00:05:43,286 --> 00:05:45,553
Morning, son. What looks good?
136
00:05:45,622 --> 00:05:47,022
Oh, I don't know... People being able
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00:05:47,090 --> 00:05:48,423
to raise themselves out of poverty,
138
00:05:48,492 --> 00:05:50,025
having a chance at a good education,
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00:05:50,093 --> 00:05:51,226
a middle class.
140
00:05:51,294 --> 00:05:53,094
You are treading on thin ice, mister.
141
00:05:53,163 --> 00:05:54,429
Now lose the attitude
142
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and cheat some people
out of their money.
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00:05:56,834 --> 00:06:00,168
[Telephone rings in distance]
144
00:06:00,237 --> 00:06:02,170
Hello, this is Angela Geils
from Kappa Kappa Capital.
145
00:06:02,239 --> 00:06:04,239
Did you know that there are some
very interesting opportunities
146
00:06:04,308 --> 00:06:07,108
available in the stock market
that you might not be aware of?
147
00:06:07,177 --> 00:06:09,244
Man: Oh, yeah? What are they?
148
00:06:09,313 --> 00:06:12,060
Uh, for example, you could
buy something called
149
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- Scabuble Shaving Systems.
- That sounds great.
150
00:06:16,186 --> 00:06:17,585
Put me down for
a million dollars' worth.
151
00:06:17,654 --> 00:06:20,316
Uh, sir, I don't recommend...
Make it two million.
152
00:06:20,317 --> 00:06:21,293
I got to go.
153
00:06:23,861 --> 00:06:25,920
Here's your commission, Mr. Geils.
154
00:06:27,091 --> 00:06:28,664
Oh, my God, I'm rich!
155
00:06:28,732 --> 00:06:30,525
Ms. Newt wants to see you.
156
00:06:33,002 --> 00:06:36,371
157
00:06:40,277 --> 00:06:42,810
[Indistinct chatter]
158
00:06:42,880 --> 00:06:48,816
159
00:06:48,886 --> 00:06:50,647
Norrah Newt. Have a seat, A.J.
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00:06:50,648 --> 00:06:52,754
[Door closes]
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00:06:52,822 --> 00:06:55,156
162
00:06:55,225 --> 00:06:56,691
It's a papasan chair.
163
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Invented by the Japanese
as a place to sit awkwardly.
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00:06:59,794 --> 00:07:02,862
165
00:07:03,020 --> 00:07:03,552
Oh!
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00:07:03,612 --> 00:07:04,616
Shit.
167
00:07:17,047 --> 00:07:18,130
I like it.
168
00:07:20,250 --> 00:07:21,150
It's different.
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00:07:21,151 --> 00:07:22,984
Did you know there's no Japanese word
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for "business"?
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00:07:23,987 --> 00:07:25,853
Isn't it "bijinesu"?
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Maybe there is.
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Heard you made your first
big commission today.
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00:07:30,660 --> 00:07:33,995
Yes, ma'am. Uh...
Scabuble Shaving Systems.
175
00:07:34,063 --> 00:07:35,063
It's garbage.
176
00:07:35,132 --> 00:07:37,626
- It's up 21% on the year.
- Exactly.
177
00:07:37,706 --> 00:07:39,200
And in tomorrow's news,
there will be a story about
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00:07:39,269 --> 00:07:41,069
a man who sliced his neck open
with a Scabuble razor,
179
00:07:41,138 --> 00:07:42,670
and that story will be planted by me,
180
00:07:42,672 --> 00:07:45,673
but not before I've unloaded
every last one of my shares.
181
00:07:45,743 --> 00:07:46,942
That's totally immoral.
182
00:07:47,010 --> 00:07:48,543
This is a $75,000 watch.
183
00:07:48,612 --> 00:07:50,754
Let me see what you got on your wrist.
184
00:07:52,682 --> 00:07:55,016
Is that moral, that you
should have cheap things
185
00:07:55,084 --> 00:07:56,884
while I enjoy the best of everything?
186
00:07:56,886 --> 00:07:58,153
I-I'm happy with what I have.
187
00:07:58,221 --> 00:08:00,422
Only because you've never had more.
188
00:08:00,490 --> 00:08:02,848
Come here. Let me show you something.
189
00:08:08,898 --> 00:08:09,956
Cute kid, huh?
190
00:08:11,034 --> 00:08:12,725
I'm thinking of buying her.
191
00:08:15,172 --> 00:08:17,372
This is me the day my
parents abandoned me.
192
00:08:17,441 --> 00:08:19,240
I bounced around foster
homes till age 15,
193
00:08:19,309 --> 00:08:20,976
when I started my own business
194
00:08:21,044 --> 00:08:22,510
buying and selling foster homes.
195
00:08:22,579 --> 00:08:24,753
By age 20, I made my first trillion.
196
00:08:26,716 --> 00:08:28,650
Did your parents ever abandon you, A.J.?
197
00:08:29,240 --> 00:08:30,118
Only once.
198
00:08:30,187 --> 00:08:31,319
Probably made you pretty vulnerable
199
00:08:31,388 --> 00:08:32,854
to sympathetic authority figures.
200
00:08:32,922 --> 00:08:34,717
That's not Mom. I mean, true.
201
00:08:35,459 --> 00:08:37,284
We're gonna go places, buddy.
202
00:08:37,661 --> 00:08:41,639
203
00:08:42,001 --> 00:08:43,453
Here's a million bucks.
204
00:08:43,867 --> 00:08:45,667
A kid's got to have some
walkin' around money.
205
00:08:45,735 --> 00:08:47,135
Wow! Thanks.
206
00:08:47,494 --> 00:08:48,470
All right. Get out of here.
207
00:08:48,538 --> 00:08:49,737
I got to be staring out the window
208
00:08:49,807 --> 00:08:50,938
for my next meeting.
209
00:08:50,940 --> 00:08:58,480
210
00:08:58,548 --> 00:08:59,815
[Sighs]
211
00:08:59,883 --> 00:09:01,617
- [Door opens]
- All right, then.
212
00:09:01,685 --> 00:09:03,751
We've successfully
infiltrated the company.
213
00:09:03,821 --> 00:09:06,149
Now it's time to start
poking a few bears,
214
00:09:06,149 --> 00:09:08,756
see if we can get them to crap
out some honey.
215
00:09:09,302 --> 00:09:11,426
How was your one-on-one with Newt, A.J.?
216
00:09:11,986 --> 00:09:13,527
- It was okay, I guess.
- Really?
217
00:09:13,575 --> 00:09:15,430
I thought you were totally
disgusted by her.
218
00:09:15,499 --> 00:09:18,033
The greed, the excess,
the possible murder.
219
00:09:18,101 --> 00:09:19,656
Hey, we have nothing on her.
220
00:09:19,918 --> 00:09:22,037
Everything you just said
is pure speculation,
221
00:09:22,105 --> 00:09:23,505
except for the greed and the excess.
222
00:09:23,573 --> 00:09:26,164
Sorry, I didn't realize
you were best friends now.
223
00:09:26,165 --> 00:09:28,243
Well, we are. A-A-Another thing.
224
00:09:28,524 --> 00:09:29,941
Why are we all so poor?
225
00:09:30,170 --> 00:09:32,132
I mean, all we need to do is buy stocks,
226
00:09:32,132 --> 00:09:34,115
sabotage the company...
We'd be on Easy Street.
227
00:09:34,184 --> 00:09:36,518
Wow, that's a lot to take in.
228
00:09:36,998 --> 00:09:38,586
[Mumbling]
229
00:09:38,588 --> 00:09:40,388
Whatever. I need to go back to work.
230
00:09:40,390 --> 00:09:42,000
Money don't sleep.
231
00:09:45,795 --> 00:09:47,662
- [Door closes]
- I don't know about you,
232
00:09:47,731 --> 00:09:50,998
- but I am starting to really like him.
- I'm worried.
233
00:09:51,000 --> 00:09:54,069
You remember back in the day,
Mahoney and the aquarium op?
234
00:09:54,137 --> 00:09:55,670
Mahoney was diagnosed with schizophrenia
235
00:09:55,739 --> 00:09:58,073
long before he decided
to live as a manta ray.
236
00:09:58,141 --> 00:10:00,675
[Sighs]
237
00:10:00,744 --> 00:10:02,077
[Door opens]
238
00:10:02,145 --> 00:10:05,547
Uh, Dr. Stolls? Can I talk to you?
239
00:10:05,615 --> 00:10:06,748
It's Scholls.
240
00:10:06,816 --> 00:10:11,152
241
00:10:11,221 --> 00:10:12,354
When I was a sophomore,
242
00:10:12,422 --> 00:10:13,821
I wrote my Behavioral Economics paper
243
00:10:13,891 --> 00:10:16,024
on the relationship
between saltine crackers
244
00:10:16,093 --> 00:10:17,292
and the United States economy.
245
00:10:17,360 --> 00:10:18,626
I thought it was odd when you smashed
246
00:10:18,695 --> 00:10:20,896
Grammbbowski's computer,
but now it's paying off.
247
00:10:20,964 --> 00:10:22,364
- Go on.
- Well, the paper
248
00:10:22,432 --> 00:10:23,765
got some attention on Wall Street
249
00:10:23,833 --> 00:10:25,633
before it was universally dismissed,
250
00:10:25,635 --> 00:10:28,103
except by one person...
Philip Grammbbowski.
251
00:10:28,171 --> 00:10:31,239
Why are you telling me this?
I thought you hated me.
252
00:10:31,241 --> 00:10:34,442
Well, I guess I was afraid of
being laughed at by everyone.
253
00:10:34,511 --> 00:10:36,244
But since you're not
someone I look up to,
254
00:10:36,246 --> 00:10:38,029
I figured it was a pretty safe bet.
255
00:10:38,837 --> 00:10:39,570
Thank you.
256
00:10:39,996 --> 00:10:41,108
That means a lot.
257
00:10:41,837 --> 00:10:43,350
Let's go get that paper.
258
00:10:45,504 --> 00:10:46,861
[Gong sounding]
259
00:10:48,683 --> 00:10:50,397
[Sniffing]
260
00:10:50,594 --> 00:10:52,594
- Whoo!
- Listen up, everybody!
261
00:10:52,662 --> 00:10:54,796
I am pleased to announce
Kappa Kappa Capital's
262
00:10:54,864 --> 00:10:57,332
next billion dollar
sales contest winner.
263
00:10:57,401 --> 00:10:59,000
You know him, you love him,
264
00:10:59,068 --> 00:11:00,279
you don't really know him.
265
00:11:00,280 --> 00:11:01,583
A.J. Pseudonym!
266
00:11:01,584 --> 00:11:05,206
[Cheers and applause]
267
00:11:05,275 --> 00:11:14,682
268
00:11:14,684 --> 00:11:23,759
269
00:11:23,827 --> 00:11:25,560
- Todd!
- Coming!
270
00:11:25,629 --> 00:11:30,365
271
00:11:30,434 --> 00:11:33,568
[All cheering]
272
00:11:33,637 --> 00:11:35,837
273
00:11:35,905 --> 00:11:37,172
Aaaah!
274
00:11:37,240 --> 00:11:40,375
Whooo! [Laughs]
275
00:11:40,444 --> 00:11:52,720
276
00:11:52,790 --> 00:11:54,189
[Groans]
277
00:11:54,257 --> 00:11:55,991
[Sighs]
278
00:11:56,059 --> 00:11:59,260
279
00:11:59,329 --> 00:12:02,263
280
00:12:02,849 --> 00:12:03,865
You done good, kid.
281
00:12:03,933 --> 00:12:05,533
You made a lot of money for the company.
282
00:12:05,535 --> 00:12:07,404
That's only gonna increase our profits.
283
00:12:07,405 --> 00:12:09,061
I'm just doing what you told me.
284
00:12:09,062 --> 00:12:11,017
Kickin' ass and takin' names.
285
00:12:16,079 --> 00:12:16,878
Charles.
286
00:12:16,946 --> 00:12:19,681
287
00:12:19,749 --> 00:12:21,939
But it's all been small potatoes so far.
288
00:12:22,619 --> 00:12:24,603
Can we get some steaks over here?
289
00:12:25,622 --> 00:12:27,397
How much money did you make this week?
290
00:12:27,398 --> 00:12:30,087
I don't know. 50, 52 billion.
291
00:12:30,480 --> 00:12:31,483
Peanuts.
292
00:12:32,029 --> 00:12:34,145
Linus is trying to give up his blanket.
293
00:12:35,032 --> 00:12:37,008
It's time we took down
the whole enchilada.
294
00:12:37,010 --> 00:12:39,236
- Server: Hot plate.
- [Sizzling]
295
00:12:39,302 --> 00:12:41,903
I got to say, $52 billion
296
00:12:41,971 --> 00:12:43,373
kind of covers my nut.
297
00:12:43,973 --> 00:12:49,645
298
00:12:49,713 --> 00:12:53,649
But why settle for $52 billion
when you could have $53 billion?
299
00:12:53,717 --> 00:12:55,450
Immoral is one thing,
but we're not talking
300
00:12:55,519 --> 00:12:57,013
about anything illegal here, are we?
301
00:12:57,014 --> 00:12:59,160
What's the matter? You scared?
302
00:12:59,389 --> 00:13:00,609
No, I'm not scared.
303
00:13:00,879 --> 00:13:02,879
It's not like your mom's gonna
be disappointed in you.
304
00:13:02,992 --> 00:13:04,275
Wh-What are you talking about?
305
00:13:04,276 --> 00:13:06,261
Because you said you
were an orphan like me.
306
00:13:06,330 --> 00:13:07,592
Oh, yeah, yes.
307
00:13:08,074 --> 00:13:10,631
T-Totally. Absolutely no parents.
308
00:13:10,632 --> 00:13:12,923
Right. So let's do this.
309
00:13:12,924 --> 00:13:14,870
Let's raid the biggest
corporation there is...
310
00:13:14,938 --> 00:13:16,911
the United States of America.
311
00:13:18,182 --> 00:13:19,113
Sign me up.
312
00:13:19,676 --> 00:13:21,579
Great. You're in.
313
00:13:22,011 --> 00:13:24,079
You're just gonna need
a swim suit, a towel,
314
00:13:24,147 --> 00:13:25,244
and a bag lunch.
315
00:13:25,815 --> 00:13:27,482
316
00:13:30,513 --> 00:13:31,042
All right.
317
00:13:31,043 --> 00:13:33,846
- Let's hear this cockamamie theory.
- I'm nervous.
318
00:13:33,847 --> 00:13:35,992
Just picture them in their underwear.
319
00:13:41,375 --> 00:13:44,576
Webster's defines
economics as the, uh...
320
00:13:44,868 --> 00:13:46,801
Two years ago, the
saltine cracker market
321
00:13:46,870 --> 00:13:48,803
took a nose dive,
and I wanted to know why,
322
00:13:48,872 --> 00:13:50,605
from a behavioral economic perspective.
323
00:13:50,674 --> 00:13:52,203
So I dug a little deeper.
324
00:13:52,204 --> 00:13:53,942
Why aren't people buying saltines?
325
00:13:54,010 --> 00:13:55,651
- Soup.
- Exactly.
326
00:13:56,079 --> 00:13:57,546
People aren't eating soup anymore.
327
00:13:57,614 --> 00:14:00,328
That's ridiculous!
I had soup as recently as...
328
00:14:00,817 --> 00:14:02,795
Oh, my God. She is right.
329
00:14:03,415 --> 00:14:04,154
Wait.
330
00:14:05,238 --> 00:14:06,821
I have no idea what we're talking about.
331
00:14:06,890 --> 00:14:09,725
Why has the soup market
suddenly gone lukewarm?
332
00:14:09,726 --> 00:14:11,959
- Why? Tell us.
- No, I'm asking you.
333
00:14:11,959 --> 00:14:14,162
That's as far as I got with my paper.
334
00:14:14,231 --> 00:14:15,841
I, uh... only got a "C."
335
00:14:17,500 --> 00:14:18,900
Scholls: People aren't eating soup
336
00:14:18,902 --> 00:14:20,501
because the Earth is getting warmer.
337
00:14:20,618 --> 00:14:21,646
And you know what that means.
338
00:14:21,647 --> 00:14:24,038
Of course! Wait.
339
00:14:24,107 --> 00:14:26,040
I still have no idea how
this relates to anything.
340
00:14:26,109 --> 00:14:28,109
Think about this... It's a hot day.
341
00:14:28,178 --> 00:14:30,178
You want to take a casual
walk around the block.
342
00:14:30,247 --> 00:14:31,383
But what do wear?
343
00:14:31,494 --> 00:14:33,114
You'll roast in a pair of long pants,
344
00:14:33,116 --> 00:14:34,687
so you reach in your closet
and pull out...
345
00:14:34,704 --> 00:14:35,584
Jean shorts.
346
00:14:35,652 --> 00:14:37,185
Jean shorts are the Achilles heel
347
00:14:37,254 --> 00:14:40,498
of the entire U.S. economy,
and Philip Grammbbowski knew it.
348
00:14:40,499 --> 00:14:42,657
He knew that if anything
were to disrupt that market,
349
00:14:42,733 --> 00:14:45,067
the whole financial system
comes crashing down.
350
00:14:45,128 --> 00:14:47,528
And guess who's been buying
up every denim factory
351
00:14:47,530 --> 00:14:49,064
from North Korea to South Korea?
352
00:14:49,132 --> 00:14:50,399
I am so sorry, guys.
353
00:14:50,467 --> 00:14:52,000
I'm not even close
to being on this train.
354
00:14:52,068 --> 00:14:53,668
Could you demonstrate with a Jenga tower
355
00:14:53,737 --> 00:14:56,004
or maybe some oranges?
356
00:14:56,073 --> 00:14:57,538
Norrah Newt is going to buy up
357
00:14:57,540 --> 00:14:59,140
all of the denim and
collapse the market.
358
00:14:59,209 --> 00:15:00,875
Grammbbowski found out
what she was doing,
359
00:15:00,944 --> 00:15:03,721
pulled out all of his money,
and ended up as turkey jerky.
360
00:15:03,722 --> 00:15:06,357
Why does Newt want to sink
the U.S. economy?
361
00:15:06,460 --> 00:15:08,016
I can't imagine she's acting alone,
362
00:15:08,085 --> 00:15:10,018
but my son is the only one
who can answer that question,
363
00:15:10,087 --> 00:15:12,020
but he has gone full Donnie Brasco.
364
00:15:12,089 --> 00:15:13,172
So take him out.
365
00:15:13,556 --> 00:15:14,283
He's my son.
366
00:15:14,284 --> 00:15:15,302
Oh, shit, right.
367
00:15:16,001 --> 00:15:17,191
But maybe taking him out
368
00:15:17,192 --> 00:15:19,248
is exactly what this situation requires.
369
00:15:20,017 --> 00:15:21,809
I swear to God, I didn't
make the connection!
370
00:15:21,915 --> 00:15:23,248
- Don't kill him!
- [Door closes]
371
00:15:23,451 --> 00:15:24,143
Great.
372
00:15:24,635 --> 00:15:25,768
Thank you.
373
00:15:26,774 --> 00:15:28,810
Gap, Levi's, Jordache,
374
00:15:28,811 --> 00:15:31,939
and Osh Kosh B'Gosh all ours.
375
00:15:31,940 --> 00:15:34,748
We now own 98% of all
jean short production.
376
00:15:34,750 --> 00:15:35,970
I'm proud of you, A.J.
377
00:15:36,246 --> 00:15:38,022
- [Sighs]
- Freeze! S.E.C.!
378
00:15:38,758 --> 00:15:40,230
Wh... Let's go, dirtbag.
379
00:15:40,231 --> 00:15:41,967
Stay strong and keep your mouth shut.
380
00:15:41,968 --> 00:15:44,288
- I said move it!
- Okay, take it easy, man!
381
00:15:44,459 --> 00:15:45,725
382
00:15:45,961 --> 00:15:46,827
Easy.
383
00:15:47,442 --> 00:15:48,575
Ow!
384
00:15:48,834 --> 00:15:49,967
[Telephones ringing]
385
00:15:50,035 --> 00:15:51,615
I don't know who you are or...
386
00:15:51,616 --> 00:15:52,910
Mom?! What the hell are you doing?
387
00:15:52,912 --> 00:15:54,842
I want to show you something.
388
00:15:54,843 --> 00:15:56,597
Mom, what the hell are you doing?
389
00:15:56,598 --> 00:15:59,242
- I want to show you something.
- [Elevator bell dings]
390
00:15:59,243 --> 00:16:00,498
Mom, what the hell are you doing?
391
00:16:00,499 --> 00:16:02,188
I want to show you something.
392
00:16:02,189 --> 00:16:02,901
Ow!
393
00:16:03,301 --> 00:16:04,701
[Indistinct talking]
394
00:16:04,845 --> 00:16:06,311
You know who that is?
395
00:16:06,373 --> 00:16:08,639
Sales are down 20%.
396
00:16:08,641 --> 00:16:09,609
No idea.
397
00:16:10,401 --> 00:16:11,976
That's Bobson Dugnutt.
398
00:16:11,977 --> 00:16:14,903
He's the former C.E.O.
of Scabuble Shaving Systems.
399
00:16:15,424 --> 00:16:16,880
What's he doing here?
400
00:16:17,671 --> 00:16:20,872
Well, since you and Newt torpedoed
his Fortune 500 company,
401
00:16:20,873 --> 00:16:22,500
he had to take a job as a C.E.O.
402
00:16:22,501 --> 00:16:24,199
at a slightly smaller company.
403
00:16:24,930 --> 00:16:27,568
He used to manage 5,500 employees.
404
00:16:27,569 --> 00:16:30,318
Now he manages 3,500.
405
00:16:31,957 --> 00:16:32,984
I didn't know.
406
00:16:32,985 --> 00:16:36,535
No, you didn't know, because
you don't stop to think
407
00:16:36,543 --> 00:16:38,357
about the human beings
behind the numbers.
408
00:16:38,358 --> 00:16:39,793
Get out of the way!
409
00:16:40,838 --> 00:16:43,559
He had to trade in his G5 for a G4.
410
00:16:44,322 --> 00:16:45,925
- And look at his suit.
- I...
411
00:16:47,486 --> 00:16:49,507
- It looks like...
- Looks like it's right off the rack?
412
00:16:49,508 --> 00:16:50,776
I'm gonna be sick.
413
00:16:51,797 --> 00:16:53,465
That's the Norrah Newt Effect.
414
00:16:54,300 --> 00:16:55,993
You still want to be part of it?
415
00:16:57,634 --> 00:16:58,949
[Strained] I don't know.
416
00:17:00,217 --> 00:17:02,699
Why is Newt trying to collapse
the jean short market?
417
00:17:02,700 --> 00:17:04,172
[Voice breaking]
I'm in too deep, Mom. I can't.
418
00:17:04,173 --> 00:17:05,636
Damn it, A.J.!
419
00:17:06,188 --> 00:17:08,055
I know things have been
hard for you, okay?
420
00:17:08,056 --> 00:17:09,633
I know I wasn't there for you.
421
00:17:09,998 --> 00:17:11,665
But none of that matters now.
422
00:17:11,733 --> 00:17:14,002
You have to decide who you want to be.
423
00:17:15,003 --> 00:17:16,175
I'm sorry, Mom.
424
00:17:17,072 --> 00:17:19,639
I guess I just love money too much now.
425
00:17:20,008 --> 00:17:22,342
426
00:17:22,410 --> 00:17:23,488
Take him away.
427
00:17:24,146 --> 00:17:25,901
- What?
- [Handcuffs click]
428
00:17:25,902 --> 00:17:28,081
- What? I don't...
- [Handcuffs click]
429
00:17:28,150 --> 00:17:30,216
[Groans] Mom...
430
00:17:30,285 --> 00:17:31,264
Mom!
431
00:17:32,488 --> 00:17:35,822
432
00:17:40,062 --> 00:17:43,463
433
00:17:43,532 --> 00:17:45,999
I'm proud of you, buddy.
You made the right decision.
434
00:17:46,068 --> 00:17:48,134
[Sighing] If I'm going
all the way with this,
435
00:17:48,203 --> 00:17:50,403
I want to know I'm gonna be mega rich,
436
00:17:50,405 --> 00:17:53,473
like don't bother bringing the
Bed Bath & Beyond coupon rich.
437
00:17:53,542 --> 00:17:54,675
I think you'll find the U.S. Treasury
438
00:17:54,743 --> 00:17:56,476
has everything you're looking for.
439
00:17:56,545 --> 00:17:58,144
Once the French government
gives us the go-ahead,
440
00:17:58,213 --> 00:18:00,947
we'll make our move and watch
the economy go into free fall.
441
00:18:01,016 --> 00:18:02,791
So the French are the ones staking you?
442
00:18:02,792 --> 00:18:04,016
That's right.
443
00:18:04,018 --> 00:18:05,752
But by the time this
whole thing burns down,
444
00:18:05,820 --> 00:18:08,421
we'll be on an island in the
middle of Lake Michigan.
445
00:18:08,423 --> 00:18:09,344
I'm in.
446
00:18:10,893 --> 00:18:12,899
I just need to use the bathroom first.
447
00:18:13,253 --> 00:18:15,320
You're gonna use a park bathroom?
448
00:18:16,279 --> 00:18:17,792
It's an emergency.
449
00:18:19,437 --> 00:18:20,194
Ooh.
450
00:18:23,081 --> 00:18:24,285
I think I got it.
451
00:18:24,639 --> 00:18:25,760
[Grunts]
452
00:18:25,761 --> 00:18:28,775
- [Record scratching]
- Tape's no good. We need it again.
453
00:18:28,843 --> 00:18:30,176
What? Are you kidding me?
454
00:18:30,245 --> 00:18:31,712
She's totally gonna suspect something.
455
00:18:31,780 --> 00:18:34,180
Just get her to run down
the basics, then get out.
456
00:18:34,249 --> 00:18:35,474
[Sighs]
457
00:18:35,475 --> 00:18:37,117
Once the French government
gives us the go-ahead,
458
00:18:37,185 --> 00:18:39,920
we'll make our move and watch
the economy go into free fall.
459
00:18:39,988 --> 00:18:41,854
So the French are the ones staking you?
460
00:18:41,856 --> 00:18:43,656
That's right, but by the time
461
00:18:43,726 --> 00:18:45,792
this whole thing burns down,
we'll be on an island
462
00:18:45,860 --> 00:18:47,928
in the middle of Lake Michigan.
463
00:18:47,996 --> 00:18:49,596
Too much interference. We didn't get it.
464
00:18:49,664 --> 00:18:50,863
Come on, man!
465
00:18:50,865 --> 00:18:53,266
One more time, and we are out of here.
466
00:18:54,610 --> 00:18:55,201
[Sighs]
467
00:18:55,203 --> 00:18:56,937
But by the time this
whole thing burns down,
468
00:18:57,005 --> 00:18:59,991
we'll be on an island in the
middle of Lake Michigan.
469
00:19:01,276 --> 00:19:02,233
Wait a second.
470
00:19:02,877 --> 00:19:05,478
471
00:19:05,480 --> 00:19:06,992
Are you wearing a wire?
472
00:19:08,617 --> 00:19:10,023
You son of a bitch!
473
00:19:11,361 --> 00:19:13,686
You could've had everything.
You could've been me.
474
00:19:13,756 --> 00:19:15,488
I guess I did fantasize about being you
475
00:19:15,557 --> 00:19:16,757
for the last day and a quarter.
476
00:19:16,825 --> 00:19:17,821
But in the end,
477
00:19:18,293 --> 00:19:21,227
I need to be someone
who makes his mom proud.
478
00:19:21,296 --> 00:19:22,565
You have a parent?!
479
00:19:23,298 --> 00:19:24,605
480
00:19:26,624 --> 00:19:28,101
A.J.: But in the end,
481
00:19:28,170 --> 00:19:31,037
I need to be someone
who makes his mom proud.
482
00:19:31,106 --> 00:19:32,537
[Click]
483
00:19:33,708 --> 00:19:35,706
Do I have to give the money back?
484
00:19:36,299 --> 00:19:37,289
Afraid so, kid.
485
00:19:37,468 --> 00:19:38,344
[Scoffs]
486
00:19:40,471 --> 00:19:42,515
Scholls, what's happening
on Wall Street?
487
00:19:42,517 --> 00:19:44,985
The markets have stabilized,
and the Treasury Department
488
00:19:45,053 --> 00:19:47,253
is raiding Kappa Kappa
Capital as we speak.
489
00:19:47,322 --> 00:19:48,921
Charo: And from a
behavioral perspective,
490
00:19:48,991 --> 00:19:51,057
people are confident
in the economy again.
491
00:19:51,126 --> 00:19:52,810
Atkins: Good work, people.
492
00:19:52,811 --> 00:19:53,728
Good work.
493
00:19:54,663 --> 00:19:56,697
Now let's head back to Los Angeles.
494
00:19:56,848 --> 00:19:58,999
495
00:19:59,067 --> 00:20:01,869
I'm desperate to do a load of laundry.
496
00:20:02,916 --> 00:20:04,101
497
00:20:04,102 --> 00:20:07,307
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00:20:16,018 --> 00:20:28,061
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00:20:28,111 --> 00:20:32,661
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