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1
00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:02,033
[Siren wails]
2
00:00:02,058 --> 00:00:08,666
[Up-tempo music playing,
indistinct conversations]
3
00:00:08,743 --> 00:00:09,425
Hey.
4
00:00:09,897 --> 00:00:12,297
We know Madame Thatcher's
running a call girl ring
5
00:00:12,476 --> 00:00:14,000
out of this club, but no
one's approached me yet.
6
00:00:14,001 --> 00:00:15,534
Of course no one's approached you.
7
00:00:15,536 --> 00:00:16,952
You look like an Amish accountant.
8
00:00:16,954 --> 00:00:19,254
Aren't you supposed to be
undercover as a call girl?
9
00:00:19,256 --> 00:00:20,338
I put on lipstick.
10
00:00:20,340 --> 00:00:23,091
If you want to blend
in, you got to prepare.
11
00:00:29,600 --> 00:00:31,600
[Liquid pours]
12
00:00:31,602 --> 00:00:33,018
I got an idea.
13
00:00:33,020 --> 00:00:35,937
Go behind the curtains and put this on.
14
00:00:55,826 --> 00:00:58,210
[Song ends]
15
00:00:58,212 --> 00:00:59,544
[Applause]
16
00:00:59,546 --> 00:01:01,246
- Geils, what do I do?
- Sing.
17
00:01:01,248 --> 00:01:03,298
Sing? I've never sung a word in my life.
18
00:01:03,300 --> 00:01:05,166
You're gonna blow our cover.
19
00:01:05,168 --> 00:01:06,218
[Sighs]
20
00:01:06,220 --> 00:01:09,254
Do you know "Fruit Salad" in "E" minor?
21
00:01:09,256 --> 00:01:12,057
[Intro plays]
22
00:01:12,059 --> 00:01:15,927
There are so very many men
that love me
23
00:01:15,929 --> 00:01:19,564
they treat me like fruit salad
in their bowls
24
00:01:19,566 --> 00:01:24,436
they say my melons are round
and my grapes are so sweet
25
00:01:24,438 --> 00:01:28,356
my juicy guava makes them lose control
26
00:01:28,358 --> 00:01:32,327
and if you think
my Berry's ripe for plucking
27
00:01:32,329 --> 00:01:36,448
I've got a special place
down in my grove
28
00:01:36,450 --> 00:01:39,284
a place where you and me can do some...
29
00:01:39,286 --> 00:01:41,036
[Music stops]
30
00:01:42,789 --> 00:01:46,591
ducking out of the storm
31
00:01:46,593 --> 00:01:49,094
I'll lighten your load
32
00:01:50,047 --> 00:01:51,763
Tanner, you there?
33
00:01:51,765 --> 00:01:52,964
Tanner?
34
00:01:52,966 --> 00:01:54,799
I'm right here. [Coughs]
35
00:01:54,801 --> 00:01:56,468
Excuse me. Copy that.
36
00:01:56,470 --> 00:01:59,104
I'm right here. Ah-choo. Excuse me.
37
00:01:59,106 --> 00:02:02,057
You guys seeing anything?
Any hookers, johns?
38
00:02:02,059 --> 00:02:04,392
No hookers, one john, but it's clean.
39
00:02:04,394 --> 00:02:06,728
Okay, well, we'll be
here waiting on your go.
40
00:02:06,730 --> 00:02:07,896
[Van door closes]
41
00:02:07,898 --> 00:02:09,614
Hey! Thanks, buddy.
42
00:02:09,616 --> 00:02:10,899
[Sighs]
43
00:02:12,569 --> 00:02:14,703
What's this? Turkey wrap?
44
00:02:14,705 --> 00:02:17,572
What part of "meatball
sub" says "turkey wrap"?
45
00:02:17,574 --> 00:02:20,075
No... no, you let me
worry about my cholesterol,
46
00:02:20,077 --> 00:02:21,993
and you worry about
getting me a meatball sub.
47
00:02:21,995 --> 00:02:23,995
[Groans]
48
00:02:23,997 --> 00:02:25,997
Sorry. I didn't mean to snap on you.
49
00:02:25,999 --> 00:02:28,333
Uh, I'm in the hangry zone.
50
00:02:28,335 --> 00:02:29,167
[Huffs]
51
00:02:29,169 --> 00:02:31,586
I'll be your cherry
52
00:02:31,588 --> 00:02:33,722
your little peach
53
00:02:33,724 --> 00:02:35,223
Hello, sir.
54
00:02:35,225 --> 00:02:37,225
How would you like to go
with me to the Booty Room?
55
00:02:37,227 --> 00:02:39,477
I would like that a lot.
56
00:02:41,148 --> 00:02:43,431
Tribeca, we got something.
57
00:02:43,433 --> 00:02:45,150
They're making a move to the Booty Room.
58
00:02:45,152 --> 00:02:49,237
...your melon balls
59
00:02:50,023 --> 00:02:53,274
Thank you. Thank you so much.
60
00:02:53,276 --> 00:02:54,859
Let's go. Okay.
61
00:02:54,861 --> 00:02:56,695
Freeze!
62
00:02:56,697 --> 00:02:58,663
This is a bust!
63
00:02:58,665 --> 00:03:01,616
Please don't tell my wife.
64
00:03:04,121 --> 00:03:05,503
[Dance music plays]
65
00:03:05,505 --> 00:03:07,706
I know there's something
dirty going on here.
66
00:03:07,708 --> 00:03:09,090
It's just a matter of time.
67
00:03:09,092 --> 00:03:11,760
Hold on, Tribeca. Those
two are up to no good.
68
00:03:11,762 --> 00:03:13,345
This is definitely it.
69
00:03:13,347 --> 00:03:15,296
We're moving in. Go, go, go!
70
00:03:15,298 --> 00:03:17,849
Stand down. Repeat... stand down.
71
00:03:17,851 --> 00:03:19,467
Stand down? Why?
72
00:03:19,469 --> 00:03:21,603
Lieutenant just called. He
wants you out of there now.
73
00:03:21,605 --> 00:03:22,887
[Sighs] What?
74
00:03:22,889 --> 00:03:24,556
We've been casing this place for two weeks.
75
00:03:24,558 --> 00:03:27,142
I want to know what the hell is going on.
76
00:03:32,900 --> 00:03:40,900
[Officer Dave screaming]
77
00:03:44,461 --> 00:03:46,578
Hey, what the hell happened last night?
78
00:03:46,580 --> 00:03:48,713
Hey, don't blame me.
That was the lieutenant.
79
00:03:48,715 --> 00:03:50,999
And watch your language in front of my kid.
80
00:03:51,001 --> 00:03:52,417
Hey, Jesse. How's it going?
81
00:03:52,419 --> 00:03:54,002
You want to take a breathalyzer test?
82
00:03:54,004 --> 00:03:55,670
Don't you think it's a little inappropriate
83
00:03:55,672 --> 00:03:57,756
to have an 8-year-old
at a police precinct?
84
00:03:57,758 --> 00:03:59,057
Did you not get the memo?
85
00:03:59,059 --> 00:04:02,143
This is "Bring Your Kid to Work" week.
86
00:04:02,145 --> 00:04:04,729
[Children screaming, pounding]
87
00:04:05,515 --> 00:04:08,016
You don't have to do this!
88
00:04:08,018 --> 00:04:09,234
[Feedback]
89
00:04:09,236 --> 00:04:10,685
This is all I need today.
90
00:04:10,687 --> 00:04:13,021
What's the matter, Tribeca?
You don't like kids?
91
00:04:13,023 --> 00:04:14,656
Look at this cute face.
92
00:04:14,658 --> 00:04:15,907
Nope, sorry. Not my thing.
93
00:04:15,909 --> 00:04:16,941
- Oh, come on!
- What?!
94
00:04:16,943 --> 00:04:18,777
What about Hoffman's kid?
95
00:04:18,779 --> 00:04:19,994
[Whimpers]
96
00:04:19,996 --> 00:04:21,446
It's doing nothing for me.
97
00:04:21,448 --> 00:04:23,698
Come on. Let's get some
answers from the lieutenant.
98
00:04:23,700 --> 00:04:26,951
Tribeca, call for backup!
I'm surrounded by cuteness.
99
00:04:26,953 --> 00:04:28,169
[Laughs]
100
00:04:28,171 --> 00:04:30,538
I need more cops in my precinct!
101
00:04:30,540 --> 00:04:33,708
And the next time you give
me excuses about the budget...
102
00:04:33,710 --> 00:04:36,544
I need a Playstation 4 in the living room,
103
00:04:36,546 --> 00:04:38,880
and the next time you give me
excuses about doing my homework...
104
00:04:38,882 --> 00:04:40,515
Both: I don't want to hear it!
105
00:04:40,517 --> 00:04:42,967
- I don't want to hear it!
- I don't want to hear it!
106
00:04:42,969 --> 00:04:45,637
- I love you, mom.
- I love you, Mr. Mayor.
107
00:04:45,639 --> 00:04:47,222
Lieutenant? A word?
108
00:04:47,224 --> 00:04:48,940
Chowder. Anything else?
109
00:04:48,942 --> 00:04:51,443
Feel a little funny talking
about stuff in front of your kid.
110
00:04:51,445 --> 00:04:53,194
Ah, good watching out, Tribeca.
111
00:04:53,196 --> 00:04:54,779
Kenny, go tell Sergeant Buckner
112
00:04:54,781 --> 00:04:57,732
I said you can have one
thing out of the evidence room.
113
00:04:57,734 --> 00:04:59,150
All right, Tribeca,
114
00:04:59,152 --> 00:05:01,736
what's got your panties all up in a bunch?
115
00:05:01,738 --> 00:05:04,072
[Sighs] Why'd you pull
us out of Thatcher's?
116
00:05:04,074 --> 00:05:05,623
That place was crawling with call girls.
117
00:05:05,625 --> 00:05:07,158
Is there something you're not telling me?
118
00:05:07,160 --> 00:05:08,910
There's tons of stuff I'm not telling you,
119
00:05:08,912 --> 00:05:10,211
like I have a twin brother, Eric,
120
00:05:10,213 --> 00:05:12,580
who sometimes covers for me at work.
121
00:05:12,582 --> 00:05:14,132
[Clears throat]
122
00:05:16,169 --> 00:05:18,303
What's going on,
Lieutenant? Something stinks.
123
00:05:18,305 --> 00:05:20,221
Sorry. It's this damn cabbage diet.
124
00:05:20,223 --> 00:05:22,757
No... Madame Thatcher.
Why can't we take her down?
125
00:05:22,759 --> 00:05:25,143
It's not the Madame I'm worried about.
126
00:05:25,145 --> 00:05:26,227
It's Herb Lackbook. [Her black book]
127
00:05:26,229 --> 00:05:27,345
Who's Herb Lackbook?
128
00:05:27,347 --> 00:05:29,931
Herb Lackbook is her accountant,
129
00:05:29,933 --> 00:05:32,484
and if we bust Thatcher, Herb will
get Hizgoons involved. [His goons]
130
00:05:32,486 --> 00:05:34,853
Tommy Hizgoons, the public relations guy?
131
00:05:34,855 --> 00:05:37,939
Exactly. And you know what Lewis
Lipsey has. [Loose lips he has]
132
00:05:37,941 --> 00:05:39,324
What does Lewis Lipsey have?
133
00:05:39,326 --> 00:05:41,993
Lewis Lipsey has a
duplicate of the client list
134
00:05:41,995 --> 00:05:43,828
in case anything happens to Herb.
135
00:05:43,830 --> 00:05:45,530
And let me guess... One
of the names on that list
136
00:05:45,532 --> 00:05:46,998
is Abeeg Mucky Muck. [A big mucky muck]
137
00:05:47,000 --> 00:05:50,952
No, Abeeg Mucky Muck went back
to Bangladesh two years ago,
138
00:05:50,954 --> 00:05:52,620
but there is another name on that list
139
00:05:52,622 --> 00:05:54,255
I wish I never found out about.
140
00:05:54,257 --> 00:05:56,457
He's an old classmate from the academy.
141
00:05:56,459 --> 00:05:58,343
Maybe he made some bad choices.
142
00:05:58,345 --> 00:06:01,262
Look, I've already told
you as much as I can.
143
00:06:01,264 --> 00:06:03,264
Now, let it go, Tribeca!
144
00:06:03,266 --> 00:06:04,682
Letting go is not in my DNA.
145
00:06:04,684 --> 00:06:06,768
However, there is a little
Irish, a little German,
146
00:06:06,770 --> 00:06:08,803
left-handedness, and
early-onset dementia.
147
00:06:08,805 --> 00:06:10,889
There's also a little
Irish and a little German.
148
00:06:10,891 --> 00:06:12,273
Did you want to see me, sir?
149
00:06:14,027 --> 00:06:16,277
Geils.
150
00:06:16,279 --> 00:06:18,563
I need you to do something unusual for me.
151
00:06:18,565 --> 00:06:20,031
How about this?
152
00:06:21,234 --> 00:06:22,817
Apparently, there's someone important
153
00:06:22,819 --> 00:06:24,235
on Thatcher's client list
154
00:06:24,237 --> 00:06:26,287
that the lieutenant doesn't want to expose.
155
00:06:26,289 --> 00:06:28,122
He told me to let it go.
156
00:06:28,124 --> 00:06:30,375
Let it go? You don't
let anything go.
157
00:06:30,377 --> 00:06:32,877
You've had a dead goldfish
on your desk for two years.
158
00:06:32,879 --> 00:06:34,662
He's sleeping.
159
00:06:34,664 --> 00:06:36,831
If we're gonna catch this
guy, we need to find out
160
00:06:36,833 --> 00:06:38,716
where Thatcher's girls take their clients,
161
00:06:38,718 --> 00:06:41,669
and that means you going
undercover as a john.
162
00:06:41,671 --> 00:06:43,304
John Geils... I like it.
163
00:06:43,306 --> 00:06:45,506
Great. Let's go.
164
00:06:45,508 --> 00:06:47,675
Hold on.
165
00:06:47,677 --> 00:06:50,645
There you go, Tommy.
166
00:06:55,262 --> 00:06:56,094
167
00:06:56,119 --> 00:06:58,670
[Mid-tempo music plays]
168
00:06:58,672 --> 00:07:01,839
[Indistinct conversations]
169
00:07:01,841 --> 00:07:02,924
May I sit here?
170
00:07:02,926 --> 00:07:05,126
I don't know. May you?
171
00:07:06,463 --> 00:07:10,131
I'm in town for the Rich
Lonely Businessman's Conference.
172
00:07:10,133 --> 00:07:12,634
Oh, the RLBC. I've heard of it.
173
00:07:12,636 --> 00:07:15,019
What can a lonely guy with
lots of money and loose morals
174
00:07:15,021 --> 00:07:16,437
do for fun in this town?
175
00:07:16,439 --> 00:07:19,223
Well, what do you think about...
176
00:07:20,860 --> 00:07:24,195
I do like whispering, but
what I was really looking for
177
00:07:24,197 --> 00:07:26,648
is someone who would trade
companionship for money.
178
00:07:26,650 --> 00:07:28,116
I would provide the money.
179
00:07:28,118 --> 00:07:30,234
- I might be able to help you.
- How much and where?
180
00:07:30,236 --> 00:07:32,203
For the first hour, you...
181
00:07:32,205 --> 00:07:34,656
Oh. Wait. We're not supposed to talk here.
182
00:07:34,658 --> 00:07:36,407
Come with me.
183
00:07:37,961 --> 00:07:39,627
That takes about 35 minutes,
184
00:07:39,629 --> 00:07:41,713
and you'll get to keep the flashlight.
185
00:07:41,715 --> 00:07:42,914
All: Shh!
186
00:07:42,916 --> 00:07:44,332
We can't talk here.
187
00:07:45,298 --> 00:07:48,549
Once they're in, the chocolate
forms a kind of candy shell.
188
00:07:48,551 --> 00:07:49,717
All: Shh!
189
00:07:49,719 --> 00:07:52,387
We can't talk here, either.
190
00:07:52,389 --> 00:07:54,605
[Men chanting]
191
00:07:57,560 --> 00:07:59,944
Are you sure it's okay to talk here?
192
00:07:59,946 --> 00:08:01,396
There's lots of cops.
193
00:08:01,398 --> 00:08:03,898
No, no, it's cool. They're
my brother's friends.
194
00:08:03,900 --> 00:08:07,235
All right, it's $500 for the first hour.
195
00:08:07,237 --> 00:08:09,654
There's a hotel down
the street from the club
196
00:08:09,656 --> 00:08:11,239
called the "All the Way Inn".
197
00:08:11,241 --> 00:08:13,908
Tell the concierge you're
there to pay for sex.
198
00:08:13,910 --> 00:08:15,910
She'll know what that means.
199
00:08:15,912 --> 00:08:17,328
All right, great. Thanks, Stacy.
200
00:08:17,330 --> 00:08:19,797
I've changed my mind about paying for sex.
201
00:08:19,799 --> 00:08:23,217
But on the upside, I'm a
cop, and you're under arrest.
202
00:08:23,219 --> 00:08:26,921
I can't believe I spent
a whole montage with you.
203
00:08:26,923 --> 00:08:29,757
[Mid-tempo music plays]
204
00:08:33,179 --> 00:08:35,430
Thanks for letting my cousin hang out.
205
00:08:35,432 --> 00:08:37,682
I never know what to do when he visits.
206
00:08:37,684 --> 00:08:39,267
Hey, Paul?
207
00:08:39,269 --> 00:08:41,819
Can you go grab a froyo?
'Cause we gotta work now.
208
00:08:41,821 --> 00:08:44,772
[Music stops]
209
00:08:46,076 --> 00:08:48,659
That thing's old and expensive.
He's just knocking it around.
210
00:08:48,661 --> 00:08:50,912
He's used to it.
211
00:08:50,914 --> 00:08:52,947
This is the place where
Thatcher's girls work.
212
00:08:52,949 --> 00:08:55,283
We'll snap a picture of
anyone who goes in and out
213
00:08:55,285 --> 00:08:57,168
and hopefully catch us the big fish.
214
00:08:57,170 --> 00:08:59,954
Oh, here comes someone now.
215
00:08:59,956 --> 00:09:01,255
[Door closes]
216
00:09:02,425 --> 00:09:03,708
Smile!
217
00:09:03,710 --> 00:09:05,093
[Camera shutter clicks]
218
00:09:05,095 --> 00:09:06,961
We'll get you some prints by Thursday.
219
00:09:07,964 --> 00:09:11,182
Pretty great seeing everyone at the
station today with their kids, huh?
220
00:09:11,184 --> 00:09:12,300
[Scoffs]
221
00:09:12,302 --> 00:09:13,684
Oh, come on.
222
00:09:13,686 --> 00:09:16,304
Don't you want someone to shower
with your love and affection?
223
00:09:16,306 --> 00:09:18,389
Someone to carry on your legacy?
224
00:09:18,391 --> 00:09:20,191
I mean, this might sound old-fashioned,
225
00:09:20,193 --> 00:09:22,310
but "forsooth, I doth longeth"
226
00:09:22,312 --> 00:09:25,446
for robust and healthy brood of mine own."
227
00:09:25,448 --> 00:09:26,864
I don't know.
228
00:09:26,866 --> 00:09:28,649
Everyone says you're supposed to have kids,
229
00:09:28,651 --> 00:09:32,320
but to me, it just sounds
like a huge pain in the ass.
230
00:09:32,322 --> 00:09:34,405
Kids screaming, pooping everywhere,
231
00:09:34,407 --> 00:09:37,158
throwing their poop, picking
bugs out of their fur,
232
00:09:37,160 --> 00:09:38,993
swinging from tree to tree.
233
00:09:38,995 --> 00:09:41,129
I think you're thinking of chimpanzees.
234
00:09:41,131 --> 00:09:42,797
They're all the same.
235
00:09:46,469 --> 00:09:48,002
Holy smokes.
236
00:09:48,004 --> 00:09:50,755
The police commissioner
just came out of the hotel.
237
00:09:50,757 --> 00:09:51,757
Oh, my god.
238
00:09:51,758 --> 00:09:53,341
He'd be so embarrassed
239
00:09:53,343 --> 00:09:55,760
if he knew he was staying
at a hotel frequented by...
240
00:09:55,762 --> 00:09:57,228
What?!
241
00:09:57,230 --> 00:10:00,898
The big fish is Commissioner
Niles J. Bigfish.
242
00:10:00,900 --> 00:10:03,184
What a scandal... not to mention the shame
243
00:10:03,186 --> 00:10:05,820
he's brought on his
Native American heritage.
244
00:10:05,855 --> 00:10:07,488
245
00:10:07,490 --> 00:10:09,740
People start pollution.
246
00:10:09,742 --> 00:10:11,943
People can stop it.
247
00:10:14,030 --> 00:10:15,696
Wow. That's an old reference.
248
00:10:15,698 --> 00:10:19,417
Call forensics. I want
them in that hotel room.
249
00:10:21,704 --> 00:10:23,254
[Hispanic accent] I finish.
250
00:10:23,256 --> 00:10:25,039
[Clears throat] [Normal voice
] I'm sorry. I'm finished.
251
00:10:25,041 --> 00:10:27,508
Oh, great. Uh, can we get
a couple extra conditioners?
252
00:10:28,461 --> 00:10:30,511
Thanks.
253
00:10:30,513 --> 00:10:31,846
Damn it. It's clean.
254
00:10:31,848 --> 00:10:34,515
Nothing? Prints, fibers, hairs?
255
00:10:34,517 --> 00:10:38,219
No, not yet, but let's see
what Mr. black light has to say.
256
00:10:38,221 --> 00:10:42,023
This will illuminate any organic
substance left in the room.
257
00:10:44,944 --> 00:10:47,862
Wow. That's a lot of organic substance.
258
00:10:47,864 --> 00:10:49,530
Geils, come and take a look at this.
259
00:10:49,532 --> 00:10:50,565
What do we got?
260
00:10:54,704 --> 00:10:56,454
What are you guys looking at?
261
00:10:58,875 --> 00:11:03,094
262
00:11:03,096 --> 00:11:04,128
[Whimpers]
263
00:11:04,130 --> 00:11:05,179
Ugh!
264
00:11:05,181 --> 00:11:06,547
[Grunts]
265
00:11:06,549 --> 00:11:08,683
What is up with you and kids?
266
00:11:08,685 --> 00:11:10,468
I don't know... maybe it's that kids
267
00:11:10,470 --> 00:11:12,637
constantly remind me that
I'm never gonna meet anyone.
268
00:11:12,639 --> 00:11:14,305
[Telephone rings] [Sighs]
269
00:11:15,859 --> 00:11:17,725
Tribeca.
270
00:11:17,727 --> 00:11:19,277
Yeah. Great.
271
00:11:19,279 --> 00:11:22,113
Geils, let's go. Scholls
came up with something.
272
00:11:22,115 --> 00:11:23,564
Right behind ya.
273
00:11:23,566 --> 00:11:25,366
[English accent] One
lump or two, Mr. Muggles?
274
00:11:25,368 --> 00:11:27,118
Cheers. Girls: Cheers!
275
00:11:27,120 --> 00:11:29,120
What do you got, Scholls?
276
00:11:29,122 --> 00:11:31,739
I got a real bombshell for you guys.
277
00:11:31,741 --> 00:11:33,658
I believe it's from World War II.
278
00:11:33,660 --> 00:11:36,544
Cool. I read a lot about these.
279
00:11:39,249 --> 00:11:41,666
Huh. Guess it's a dud.
280
00:11:42,418 --> 00:11:44,385
Hand me a hammer, would ya?
281
00:11:48,758 --> 00:11:50,091
[Hollow clank]
282
00:11:50,093 --> 00:11:51,676
Oh, well.
283
00:11:51,678 --> 00:11:53,344
[Explosion]
284
00:11:53,346 --> 00:11:56,264
Take a look at this sperm
sample from the hotel.
285
00:11:56,266 --> 00:11:59,600
[All shouting]
286
00:11:59,602 --> 00:12:01,018
Hmm.
287
00:12:01,020 --> 00:12:02,403
Did you get a match on that?
288
00:12:02,405 --> 00:12:04,071
Well, that's where things
get really interesting.
289
00:12:04,073 --> 00:12:07,275
Did you know that all county
employees submit a DNA sample
290
00:12:07,277 --> 00:12:09,827
to differentiate themselves
from criminals at crime scenes?
291
00:12:09,829 --> 00:12:12,663
Wow. How'd you know that?
You're really good at your job.
292
00:12:13,499 --> 00:12:15,366
I wish we could spend
time together, just us.
293
00:12:15,368 --> 00:12:17,451
Anyway, I cross-checked
it with the database.
294
00:12:17,453 --> 00:12:18,703
Guess what I came up with.
295
00:12:18,705 --> 00:12:21,289
Commissioner Niles J. Bigfish.
296
00:12:21,291 --> 00:12:23,124
That's right, but that's not all.
297
00:12:23,126 --> 00:12:24,425
We also...
298
00:12:25,428 --> 00:12:26,844
Oh, no. That's all.
299
00:12:28,881 --> 00:12:31,799
Lieutenant, we've got the
commissioner on the scene.
300
00:12:31,801 --> 00:12:33,551
We have enough sperm to gel the hair
301
00:12:33,553 --> 00:12:35,052
of the entire Italian army.
302
00:12:35,054 --> 00:12:36,103
That's a ton of sperm.
303
00:12:36,105 --> 00:12:37,305
Let's take down Bigfish
304
00:12:37,307 --> 00:12:38,806
and Madame Thatcher's whole operation.
305
00:12:38,808 --> 00:12:42,276
You don't understand! I
owe Bigfish everything.
306
00:12:43,313 --> 00:12:46,197
[Funky music plays]
307
00:12:47,317 --> 00:12:49,483
One more quick one, Jimmy! One more!
308
00:12:49,485 --> 00:12:50,651
This is clearly unsafe!
309
00:12:50,653 --> 00:12:52,236
Make sure you get the guns.
310
00:12:52,238 --> 00:12:54,705
Move! Move!
311
00:12:58,294 --> 00:12:59,710
This thing's going South quick!
312
00:12:59,712 --> 00:13:01,963
I don't know if we're
gonna get out of here!
313
00:13:01,965 --> 00:13:03,631
Of course we will!
314
00:13:04,584 --> 00:13:06,500
'Cause I got your back, and you got mine!
315
00:13:06,502 --> 00:13:07,835
Right, partner?
316
00:13:07,837 --> 00:13:09,136
Always!
317
00:13:09,138 --> 00:13:10,138
[Tires screech]
318
00:13:10,139 --> 00:13:12,423
Atkins! Get down!
319
00:13:20,767 --> 00:13:22,350
[Gunshot]
320
00:13:22,352 --> 00:13:24,235
Bigfish!
321
00:13:24,237 --> 00:13:26,437
[Tires squeal]
322
00:13:26,439 --> 00:13:27,855
[Groans] Bigfish.
323
00:13:27,857 --> 00:13:29,774
So... cold.
324
00:13:29,776 --> 00:13:32,827
This bag of ice isn't doing you any favors.
325
00:13:32,829 --> 00:13:34,445
Maybe I was wrong.
326
00:13:34,447 --> 00:13:36,414
Maybe we don't make it out this time.
327
00:13:36,416 --> 00:13:37,999
Don't say that!
328
00:13:38,001 --> 00:13:40,334
Remember what you always
said eight seconds ago?
329
00:13:40,336 --> 00:13:43,170
I got your back, and you
got mine. Right, partner?
330
00:13:43,172 --> 00:13:45,373
Promise? I promise.
331
00:13:45,375 --> 00:13:47,291
I promise.
332
00:13:47,293 --> 00:13:48,959
I promise!
333
00:13:50,963 --> 00:13:52,046
You... promise what?
334
00:13:52,048 --> 00:13:53,547
You said you owed Bigfish everything
335
00:13:53,549 --> 00:13:55,383
and then went quiet for 30 seconds.
336
00:13:55,385 --> 00:13:56,884
He saved my life.
337
00:13:57,804 --> 00:13:59,520
I promised I'd always have his back,
338
00:13:59,522 --> 00:14:01,555
and I can't be a friend
if I break that promise.
339
00:14:01,557 --> 00:14:05,226
But I can't be a cop if
I don't uphold the law!
340
00:14:05,228 --> 00:14:08,195
I'm very conflicted right
now. It's a moral dilemma.
341
00:14:08,197 --> 00:14:09,730
This is my vulnerable side.
342
00:14:09,732 --> 00:14:11,449
I'm gonna stare at my locket.
343
00:14:11,451 --> 00:14:14,485
I suggest you back out slowly.
344
00:14:17,957 --> 00:14:19,323
Faster than that.
345
00:14:22,662 --> 00:14:24,745
Just because the lieutenant's
out doesn't mean I am.
346
00:14:24,747 --> 00:14:26,580
Let's go. Where we going?
347
00:14:26,582 --> 00:14:28,082
To catch a big fish.
348
00:14:28,084 --> 00:14:31,802
And to catch a big fish,
you need the right bait.
349
00:14:41,297 --> 00:14:43,047
350
00:14:48,304 --> 00:14:49,520
All right, I'm ready.
351
00:14:49,522 --> 00:14:50,688
What are you doing?
352
00:14:50,690 --> 00:14:52,440
I'm the bait for the commissioner.
353
00:14:52,442 --> 00:14:53,808
Reel him in and bust him.
354
00:14:53,810 --> 00:14:56,560
I thought I would handle that.
355
00:14:56,562 --> 00:14:58,696
Oh. Yeah. Okay.
356
00:14:58,698 --> 00:15:00,865
I'll just go hang in the van.
357
00:15:00,867 --> 00:15:01,649
You okay?
358
00:15:01,651 --> 00:15:02,983
Yeah, yeah, I'm fine.
359
00:15:02,985 --> 00:15:06,403
I was gonna wear this anyway. Laundry day.
360
00:15:09,125 --> 00:15:11,041
[Door closes]
361
00:15:13,963 --> 00:15:15,246
[Door closes]
362
00:15:15,248 --> 00:15:16,797
Well, well.
363
00:15:16,799 --> 00:15:19,800
Aren't you a tall drink of water.
364
00:15:21,504 --> 00:15:23,587
Mmm. That's better.
365
00:15:23,589 --> 00:15:26,006
And now to satisfy my crude physical needs.
366
00:15:26,008 --> 00:15:27,675
Hi. I'm Niles. What's your name?
367
00:15:27,677 --> 00:15:29,009
I'm Angie. That's funny.
368
00:15:29,011 --> 00:15:31,061
There's a detective in one of our precincts
369
00:15:31,063 --> 00:15:32,813
named Angie... looks a lot like you.
370
00:15:32,815 --> 00:15:33,981
Do you have a sister?
371
00:15:33,983 --> 00:15:36,150
Why would we both be named Angie?
372
00:15:36,152 --> 00:15:37,351
[Laughs] You're sweet.
373
00:15:37,353 --> 00:15:39,186
I'm gonna get undressed now.
374
00:15:39,188 --> 00:15:42,690
Here's the deal... It's
been a long, hard day.
375
00:15:42,692 --> 00:15:45,910
And baby wants baba.
376
00:15:45,912 --> 00:15:46,827
Pardon me?
377
00:15:46,829 --> 00:15:48,746
Oh, are you a new girl?
378
00:15:48,748 --> 00:15:50,247
I have an adult baby fetish.
379
00:15:50,249 --> 00:15:53,083
I'm gonna act like a baby.
You're gonna act like my mommy.
380
00:15:53,085 --> 00:15:55,002
You don't want to have sex with me?
381
00:15:55,004 --> 00:15:56,370
Eww! Yucky!
382
00:15:56,372 --> 00:15:58,539
Baby want baba.
383
00:15:58,541 --> 00:16:00,624
I'm not sure that's illegal.
384
00:16:00,626 --> 00:16:03,928
Oh, trust me... Once
I pay you, it's illegal.
385
00:16:03,930 --> 00:16:06,096
Well, then, can I have some mo-ney?
386
00:16:06,098 --> 00:16:07,047
[Chuckles]
387
00:16:07,049 --> 00:16:10,634
Babies don't have money, silly mommy.
388
00:16:10,636 --> 00:16:13,020
Baby made a whoopsie.
389
00:16:13,022 --> 00:16:15,272
I'm really gonna need
to see that money first.
390
00:16:15,274 --> 00:16:16,724
No.
391
00:16:16,726 --> 00:16:19,860
First, change diapey.
392
00:16:21,230 --> 00:16:23,063
[Imitates baby crying]
All right, all right.
393
00:16:23,065 --> 00:16:25,366
Do you have a diaper bag or something?
394
00:16:25,368 --> 00:16:27,651
[Whistles] [Sighs]
395
00:16:27,653 --> 00:16:30,738
[Grunts]
396
00:16:30,740 --> 00:16:32,323
[Imitates baby crying]
397
00:16:32,325 --> 00:16:34,241
Okay, stop squirming!
398
00:16:34,243 --> 00:16:35,743
[Giggles]
399
00:16:35,745 --> 00:16:37,578
Oh. Looks like there's no whoopsie.
400
00:16:37,580 --> 00:16:38,746
Just a pee-pee.
401
00:16:38,748 --> 00:16:40,965
Up you go. [Coos]
402
00:16:40,967 --> 00:16:42,216
Ooh.
403
00:16:42,218 --> 00:16:43,300
[Coos]
404
00:16:43,302 --> 00:16:44,501
[Sighs]
405
00:16:44,503 --> 00:16:46,086
[Sighs] Okay.
406
00:16:46,088 --> 00:16:49,173
There's your fresh diaper.
Now show me some cash.
407
00:16:49,175 --> 00:16:50,090
Baba.
408
00:16:50,092 --> 00:16:52,459
I've had enough of this shit!
409
00:16:52,461 --> 00:16:55,596
Commissioner Bigfish,
you're under arrest for...
410
00:16:55,598 --> 00:16:57,231
Whatever the hell this is.
411
00:16:57,233 --> 00:17:00,234
There's not a jury in the
world that would convict a baby.
412
00:17:00,236 --> 00:17:01,435
I'll take my chances.
413
00:17:02,021 --> 00:17:04,738
Ugh! Geils! He's on the run!
414
00:17:04,740 --> 00:17:06,273
I don't see him.
415
00:17:06,275 --> 00:17:07,575
The only person out here
416
00:17:07,577 --> 00:17:09,526
is a large baby running down the street.
417
00:17:09,528 --> 00:17:12,863
Yeah, that's him! Take that baby down!
418
00:17:12,865 --> 00:17:15,749
Hey! Stop right there, sweetie!
419
00:17:18,254 --> 00:17:20,120
What are you gonna do...
Shoot me with that, little guy?
420
00:17:20,122 --> 00:17:21,288
You gonna shoot...
421
00:17:21,290 --> 00:17:23,090
Aaaaaah!
422
00:17:24,176 --> 00:17:26,126
[Exhales sharply]
423
00:17:36,222 --> 00:17:37,938
[Baby giggling]
424
00:17:51,037 --> 00:17:53,537
[Babies crying]
425
00:17:59,128 --> 00:18:01,629
You're a disgrace to the U.S. Navy!
426
00:18:06,469 --> 00:18:07,718
Aha!
427
00:18:12,035 --> 00:18:13,901
[Grunts]
428
00:18:13,926 --> 00:18:15,309
Ungh!
429
00:18:16,178 --> 00:18:17,344
Whoa.
430
00:18:17,346 --> 00:18:19,680
Easy there, Commissioner.
You don't have to do this.
431
00:18:19,682 --> 00:18:21,148
You got your whole life ahead of you.
432
00:18:21,150 --> 00:18:23,017
Sorry about this, Detective Geils,
433
00:18:23,019 --> 00:18:24,985
but if word were to get out,
434
00:18:24,987 --> 00:18:26,570
I'd be ruined as police commissioner.
435
00:18:26,572 --> 00:18:28,355
[Grunts]
436
00:18:28,357 --> 00:18:31,358
If there's two things I
love, it's serving the city...
437
00:18:31,360 --> 00:18:33,027
And wearing pajamas
with snaps at the bottom.
438
00:18:33,029 --> 00:18:35,362
Woman: That cross-dresser's
attacking that baby!
439
00:18:35,364 --> 00:18:36,864
I'm a cop! [Grunts]
440
00:18:36,866 --> 00:18:38,499
Ugh! [Toy squeaks]
441
00:18:38,501 --> 00:18:39,700
[Grunts]
442
00:18:39,702 --> 00:18:41,085
No! No! No!
443
00:18:41,087 --> 00:18:43,871
Shh, shh. Shh. No! No!
444
00:18:46,042 --> 00:18:47,591
[Snores]
445
00:18:47,593 --> 00:18:49,209
[Keys jingling] Hey, buddy.
446
00:18:49,211 --> 00:18:52,129
Come on. You like these keys?
You like these shiny keys?
447
00:18:52,131 --> 00:18:54,715
You want 'em? Come here.
Take 'em. It's okay.
448
00:18:54,717 --> 00:18:58,052
Want the keys? Here. Look at that!
449
00:18:58,054 --> 00:18:59,770
Well done, Geils. Stand him up.
450
00:18:59,772 --> 00:19:01,722
Atkins, we made a promise!
451
00:19:01,724 --> 00:19:04,308
Sorry, Bigfish, but we also
made another promise...
452
00:19:04,310 --> 00:19:06,894
To preserve and uphold the
law, and you broke that promise.
453
00:19:06,896 --> 00:19:10,197
[Crying] I know. I'm sorry.
454
00:19:11,400 --> 00:19:13,067
It's okay. It's okay.
455
00:19:13,069 --> 00:19:15,869
These nice policemen are gonna
take you down to the precinct,
456
00:19:15,871 --> 00:19:17,788
and they're gonna book you.
457
00:19:17,790 --> 00:19:19,490
Doesn't that sound fun? Yeah.
458
00:19:19,492 --> 00:19:20,908
Okay. [Chuckling] Okay.
459
00:19:20,910 --> 00:19:23,243
I'm so embarrassed. He's just tired.
460
00:19:23,245 --> 00:19:25,129
It's okay. He'll sleep in the car.
461
00:19:27,299 --> 00:19:29,800
462
00:19:31,387 --> 00:19:34,221
I guess we're clear to
take down Madame Thatcher.
463
00:19:34,223 --> 00:19:35,089
Yeah, yeah, right.
464
00:19:35,091 --> 00:19:36,757
Do you think he's buckled in okay?
465
00:19:36,759 --> 00:19:40,060
Yes. We checked and double-checked. Relax.
466
00:19:41,680 --> 00:19:44,148
I really hope he makes friends in jail.
467
00:19:44,150 --> 00:19:45,933
He'll be fine.
468
00:19:45,935 --> 00:19:48,152
Is someone here thinking about kids?
469
00:19:48,154 --> 00:19:49,820
What?! Pssh!
470
00:19:53,826 --> 00:19:55,609
They sure are cute when they sleep, though.
471
00:19:55,611 --> 00:19:57,161
Well, we're here.
472
00:19:57,163 --> 00:20:00,280
Why don't we just go around
the block a couple more times?
473
00:20:00,282 --> 00:20:01,365
[Sighs]
474
00:20:02,618 --> 00:20:03,834
["Rock-a-bye baby" plays]
475
00:20:03,836 --> 00:20:06,120
Ohhh! Ohhh!
476
00:20:07,456 --> 00:20:09,089
[Vomits]
477
00:20:16,893 --> 00:20:18,893
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478
00:20:18,943 --> 00:20:23,493
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