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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,246 --> 00:00:03,677 Going all the way up to the front, if you want to follow me. 2 00:00:03,765 --> 00:00:05,765 All the way up here, file in please. 3 00:00:06,716 --> 00:00:10,038 Here is the museum's most valuable piece, 4 00:00:10,063 --> 00:00:12,954 "Thumb", painted by Carpaccio MacGuffin 5 00:00:12,955 --> 00:00:14,658 the Scottish Italian master, 6 00:00:14,720 --> 00:00:18,934 this painting is the last work he ever did before he went into seclusion. 7 00:00:18,934 --> 00:00:21,653 It is worth well over $10 million. 8 00:00:21,654 --> 00:00:24,091 Look in front of you, see these velvet ropes, 9 00:00:24,116 --> 00:00:27,428 they prevent anyone from getting close to the painting. 10 00:00:27,616 --> 00:00:29,195 [Oohh!] 11 00:00:29,207 --> 00:00:33,994 And as an added level of security, look at the sign. 12 00:00:34,079 --> 00:00:36,772 Let's move on to the room with the boring pots in it. 13 00:00:36,772 --> 00:00:41,359 Follow me right this way. Everyone this way. 14 00:00:42,728 --> 00:00:44,919 - And to your right. - 15 00:01:20,967 --> 00:01:25,118 I don't believe indigenous people had micro waves and one could only imagine 16 00:01:25,142 --> 00:01:27,100 the bland food they cooked in these pots. 17 00:01:27,101 --> 00:01:31,014 Here we have well preserved examples of Greek and Roman statutes, 18 00:01:31,014 --> 00:01:34,684 you can see that they're a depiction of the ideal human form 19 00:01:34,735 --> 00:01:36,420 except for this one, of course, 20 00:01:36,445 --> 00:01:41,617 which is the fat slovenly Cupid, god of love, clearly he loved pizza most of all. 21 00:01:41,641 --> 00:01:43,641 [Laughter] 22 00:01:43,760 --> 00:01:48,619 Now follow me over here and take a look at the museum's most prized... 23 00:01:50,209 --> 00:01:54,755 [Scream] 24 00:02:04,340 --> 00:02:06,340 Tribeca, Geils! 25 00:02:07,217 --> 00:02:09,809 Toby, knock it off, will you? 26 00:02:09,809 --> 00:02:11,790 Sorry, Lieutenant the other day you requested more hubbub. 27 00:02:11,889 --> 00:02:15,510 - OK. Take it down to a dull roar. - Gottcha. 28 00:02:18,181 --> 00:02:20,181 Geils, Tribeca, my office. 29 00:02:24,232 --> 00:02:26,800 - You wanted to see us, sir? - Yeah, you ever heard of 30 00:02:26,825 --> 00:02:30,185 - Carpaccio MacGuffin? - The Scottish Italian master 31 00:02:30,185 --> 00:02:32,722 who disappeared after painting his masterwork "Thumb"? 32 00:02:32,831 --> 00:02:36,389 Yes, obviously. MacGuffin's "Thumb" disappeared 33 00:02:36,389 --> 00:02:39,425 - from the Olsen-Medavoy Gallery this morning. - The OMG. 34 00:02:39,510 --> 00:02:41,641 I thought it was at the Lewis Oberby Library. 35 00:02:41,741 --> 00:02:45,348 The LOL, don't make me laugh, that burned down last year, 36 00:02:45,348 --> 00:02:47,465 - so they moved it. - And what did they build in its place? 37 00:02:47,466 --> 00:02:51,191 Another one of those damn parking garages from the Wayne Tyson Foundation. 38 00:02:51,191 --> 00:02:53,574 - WTF! - I know just what we needed, 39 00:02:53,574 --> 00:02:54,987 but you heard about Tyson, right? 40 00:02:54,987 --> 00:02:58,105 He came down with a testicular membrane infection. 41 00:02:58,205 --> 00:03:00,274 - TMI? - For realsies. 42 00:03:00,274 --> 00:03:03,945 This is your divorce agreement. Btdubs, you got robbed. 43 00:03:03,946 --> 00:03:06,800 I know. FML. 44 00:03:19,637 --> 00:03:21,968 It's okay, kid, you wouldn't be human if you didn't 45 00:03:21,968 --> 00:03:24,258 have some type of reaction to a missing painting. 46 00:03:25,057 --> 00:03:29,521 [Dog barking] 47 00:03:29,545 --> 00:03:31,545 - Scholls, what do got here? - Whoa, whoa, whoa, Detective. 48 00:03:31,769 --> 00:03:33,569 Watch out for the velvet ropes. 49 00:03:34,391 --> 00:03:36,807 - What do we got? - Whoever did this knew what he was doing. 50 00:03:36,831 --> 00:03:38,144 He got past the ropes no problem. 51 00:03:38,145 --> 00:03:40,530 - So what about the sign? - He was very clever here. 52 00:03:40,630 --> 00:03:44,159 Look how he altered the meaning of the sign by spray painting over the word "not". 53 00:03:44,159 --> 00:03:47,425 "Do touch". Man, that's diabolical. 54 00:03:47,923 --> 00:03:49,572 We're taking as many prints as possible. 55 00:03:49,672 --> 00:03:51,175 We'll let you know what we come up with. 56 00:03:52,385 --> 00:03:54,408 What's going on with this pedestal here. 57 00:03:54,408 --> 00:03:55,760 Oh there was a cupid statute there 58 00:03:55,860 --> 00:03:57,539 but it was just a temporary exhibit on loan 59 00:03:57,564 --> 00:04:01,903 from an antiquities dealer, a Dr. Zaius. 60 00:04:02,091 --> 00:04:05,523 - We're on it. - Well Tribeca, time for a checkup. 61 00:04:05,548 --> 00:04:10,574 - If the doctor is in. - I sure hope so, I have a scrotal hernia. 62 00:04:27,507 --> 00:04:30,086 I just love old stuff. Everything about it. 63 00:04:30,110 --> 00:04:32,110 The smell, the feel... 64 00:04:32,872 --> 00:04:37,078 - L.A.P.D., are you Dr. Zaius? - Oh no, Dr. Zaius is my brother. 65 00:04:37,102 --> 00:04:39,102 I'm just Mr. Zaius. 66 00:04:39,838 --> 00:04:43,055 - You guys can call me Randy. - Quite a shiner you've got there, Randy. 67 00:04:43,155 --> 00:04:44,606 Oh, thank you. 68 00:04:45,114 --> 00:04:46,372 I call it a mop. 69 00:04:46,425 --> 00:04:48,590 - Is your brother around? - Oh, yeah. Sorry. 70 00:04:50,056 --> 00:04:52,825 Randy? What kind of a name is "Randy"? 71 00:04:52,826 --> 00:04:56,219 It's Welsh actually. Good afternoon, I'm Dr. Zaius. 72 00:04:56,219 --> 00:04:57,385 How can I help you? 73 00:04:57,387 --> 00:04:59,454 Wow, you really do look a lot like your brother. 74 00:04:59,556 --> 00:05:02,056 Really? I don't see it. Please come in. 75 00:05:02,058 --> 00:05:04,943 76 00:05:12,902 --> 00:05:14,402 Would you like some coffee? 77 00:05:14,404 --> 00:05:15,787 Yes, please. 78 00:05:15,789 --> 00:05:17,905 I'm Detective Tribeca, this is Detective Geils, 79 00:05:17,907 --> 00:05:19,407 and we're here to talk to you about what happened 80 00:05:19,409 --> 00:05:21,125 at the Olsen-Medavoy Gallery. 81 00:05:21,127 --> 00:05:23,294 [Both slurp] 82 00:05:23,296 --> 00:05:24,245 Ohh! Aah! 83 00:05:24,247 --> 00:05:26,080 Oh, my god, that's terrible. 84 00:05:26,082 --> 00:05:28,249 - And really cold. - I'm not surprised. 85 00:05:28,251 --> 00:05:30,885 This coffee was brewed by Napoleon Bonaparte 86 00:05:30,887 --> 00:05:32,804 just before the Battle of Waterloo. 87 00:05:32,806 --> 00:05:34,255 [Blows] 88 00:05:34,257 --> 00:05:36,557 Would you care for some macaroons 89 00:05:36,559 --> 00:05:38,259 from the age of enlightenment? 90 00:05:38,261 --> 00:05:40,971 How about a potato chip from the Kennedy administration? 91 00:05:41,272 --> 00:05:42,072 Okay. 92 00:05:42,143 --> 00:05:44,042 Were you aware that MacGuffin's "Thumb" 93 00:05:44,147 --> 00:05:46,294 was stolen from the OMG this morning? 94 00:05:46,349 --> 00:05:49,934 How awful. That's such a seminal piece. 95 00:05:49,936 --> 00:05:51,269 [Chuckles] 96 00:05:51,271 --> 00:05:52,737 That's not what it means. 97 00:05:52,739 --> 00:05:57,692 Apparently, one of your statues was on loan to the museum from... 98 00:05:57,694 --> 00:05:59,611 yesterday to today. 99 00:05:59,613 --> 00:06:02,497 I'm always happy to share my antiquities with the world. 100 00:06:02,499 --> 00:06:04,365 They really belong to all of us. 101 00:06:04,367 --> 00:06:06,451 - Can we see it? - No. It's mine. 102 00:06:06,453 --> 00:06:08,753 The painting was there. The statue arrives. 103 00:06:08,755 --> 00:06:11,873 The painting disappears. The statue disappears. 104 00:06:11,875 --> 00:06:14,676 If you say so. Frankly, the comings and goings of the pieces 105 00:06:14,678 --> 00:06:17,378 is Randy's responsibility, and he's a first-class idiot, 106 00:06:17,380 --> 00:06:19,214 a real dumb-dumb double zero. 107 00:06:19,216 --> 00:06:21,216 Now, if you'll excuse me, the cake from 108 00:06:21,218 --> 00:06:23,718 Theodore Roosevelt's 35th birthday just arrived, 109 00:06:23,720 --> 00:06:25,386 and it's in terrible condition. 110 00:06:25,388 --> 00:06:26,471 Sit down, Zaius! 111 00:06:26,473 --> 00:06:28,301 You're trying to tell me 112 00:06:28,327 --> 00:06:30,124 that that timeline is coincidental? 113 00:06:30,238 --> 00:06:31,488 How dare you come in here 114 00:06:31,489 --> 00:06:34,239 with your cheap suit and your lousy haircut? 115 00:06:34,241 --> 00:06:35,874 Where did you get that, ladies prison? 116 00:06:35,899 --> 00:06:37,899 Salon Training Studio. 117 00:06:37,924 --> 00:06:38,639 How about this? 118 00:06:38,999 --> 00:06:41,849 I'll make some inquiries in the art world, ask around. 119 00:06:41,955 --> 00:06:44,706 If I find anything out, I'll call you. 120 00:06:45,182 --> 00:06:46,265 What's the number? 121 00:06:46,290 --> 00:06:48,358 - It's 3... - Oh, hold on. 122 00:06:48,470 --> 00:06:50,470 Ink dried up. 123 00:06:50,472 --> 00:06:51,438 Go ahead. 124 00:06:51,440 --> 00:06:53,773 - It's 3... - Oh, dried up again. 125 00:06:53,775 --> 00:06:55,892 [Chuckles] Go ahead. 126 00:06:55,894 --> 00:06:56,977 - It's 3... - Oops. 127 00:06:56,979 --> 00:06:59,145 Dried up. Sorry. [Chuckles] 128 00:06:59,147 --> 00:07:00,730 One more time. Go ahead. 129 00:07:00,732 --> 00:07:03,066 - It's 3... - No, it dried up. Sorry. 130 00:07:04,119 --> 00:07:05,819 - Go ahead. - It's 3... 131 00:07:05,821 --> 00:07:07,704 Ah, shoot. Dried up. 132 00:07:08,540 --> 00:07:11,157 - It's 3... - No, it dried up again. 133 00:07:11,159 --> 00:07:13,577 So sorry. One more time. Go. 134 00:07:13,579 --> 00:07:15,712 - It's 3... - All right, don't say "it's." 135 00:07:15,714 --> 00:07:18,298 That's what's taking the time... the word "it's." 136 00:07:18,300 --> 00:07:20,584 You say it, it dries up, okay? 137 00:07:20,586 --> 00:07:21,586 Go. 138 00:07:21,587 --> 00:07:23,920 - 3... - Too late. 139 00:07:25,173 --> 00:07:26,840 Tell you what... I have a photographic memory. 140 00:07:26,842 --> 00:07:29,309 You say it, and I'll... I'll just remember it. 141 00:07:29,311 --> 00:07:30,311 - Go ahead. - Okay, 333... 142 00:07:30,312 --> 00:07:32,395 - Mm-hmm... - 2333. 143 00:07:32,397 --> 00:07:34,014 Okay, start any time you want. 144 00:07:34,016 --> 00:07:35,849 145 00:07:37,064 --> 00:07:40,204 [Sighs] I feel like Dr. Zaius is giving us the runaround. 146 00:07:40,205 --> 00:07:42,135 You think he has something to do with the stolen painting? 147 00:07:42,212 --> 00:07:44,634 I don't know. I think this one we just leave unsolved. 148 00:07:44,634 --> 00:07:45,879 Leave unsolved? 149 00:07:46,035 --> 00:07:48,746 I've literally never heard either of those words come out of your mouth, 150 00:07:48,809 --> 00:07:50,104 and I've known you for three weeks. 151 00:07:50,106 --> 00:07:52,391 It's just a dumb, old painting. Who cares? 152 00:07:52,647 --> 00:07:53,343 "Who cares?" 153 00:07:53,462 --> 00:07:55,893 I've literally never heard either of those words come out of your mouth, 154 00:07:55,895 --> 00:07:57,361 and I've known you for three weeks. 155 00:07:57,363 --> 00:07:59,527 Is there something going on here I don't know about? 156 00:07:59,918 --> 00:08:01,365 Let's just drop it, okay? 157 00:08:01,367 --> 00:08:03,701 - I'll tell you when you really push me on it later. - Fine. 158 00:08:03,703 --> 00:08:06,070 If Dr. Zaius hasn't given us enough information 159 00:08:06,072 --> 00:08:07,955 to make him a prime suspect, 160 00:08:07,957 --> 00:08:10,541 maybe his brother, Randy, can chime in. 161 00:08:10,543 --> 00:08:11,993 Are you in or out? 162 00:08:11,995 --> 00:08:15,129 [Sighs] Let's roll. 163 00:08:18,101 --> 00:08:21,569 [Knocking on door] 164 00:08:22,405 --> 00:08:23,704 Oh. 165 00:08:23,706 --> 00:08:24,906 Yeah? 166 00:08:24,908 --> 00:08:26,908 Randy Zaius? L.A.P.D. 167 00:08:26,910 --> 00:08:28,459 Do you remember us from this afternoon? 168 00:08:28,461 --> 00:08:30,544 Oh, yeah, yeah. I remember you guys. 169 00:08:30,546 --> 00:08:31,579 Come on in. 170 00:08:31,581 --> 00:08:34,048 171 00:08:37,544 --> 00:08:38,723 Nice place. 172 00:08:38,748 --> 00:08:41,914 Thanks. It's cheap, but it's inexpensive. 173 00:08:42,024 --> 00:08:44,774 No one gets into the antiquities game for the money. 174 00:08:44,776 --> 00:08:46,610 It's funny that you mention that because I noticed 175 00:08:46,612 --> 00:08:50,147 that your brother, Dr. Zaius, was wearing a $1,500 suit today. 176 00:08:50,149 --> 00:08:51,565 We took a look at his tax records, 177 00:08:51,567 --> 00:08:54,651 and it turns out he owns a boathouse, a house boat, 178 00:08:54,653 --> 00:08:56,987 a pool house and a house pool. 179 00:08:56,989 --> 00:09:00,157 Oh, I wouldn't know. I've never been to his house. 180 00:09:00,159 --> 00:09:02,075 Hmm. Did you paint that? 181 00:09:02,077 --> 00:09:04,327 Yeah. It's not very good, I know. 182 00:09:04,329 --> 00:09:05,623 But I'm... I'm just starting. 183 00:09:05,723 --> 00:09:07,686 A kangaroo with a light switch for a head. 184 00:09:07,749 --> 00:09:09,715 What do you call it... a kanger-switch? 185 00:09:09,717 --> 00:09:11,000 Actually, it's a switcheroo. 186 00:09:11,002 --> 00:09:12,635 Clever. I'd like to buy it. 187 00:09:12,637 --> 00:09:14,337 Oh, you don't want that. It's a terrible painting. 188 00:09:14,339 --> 00:09:15,838 You can get something better than that. 189 00:09:15,840 --> 00:09:16,631 That one's garbage. 190 00:09:16,631 --> 00:09:19,178 Did Dr. Zaius give you that black eye, Randy? 191 00:09:19,334 --> 00:09:21,584 Yeah, but we like to punch each other in the eye. 192 00:09:21,586 --> 00:09:23,169 I mean, I punched him yesterday, 193 00:09:23,171 --> 00:09:24,420 so it was kind of his turn. 194 00:09:24,422 --> 00:09:25,922 It's a game. We call it "punch punch." 195 00:09:25,924 --> 00:09:27,590 Your brother doesn't treat you very well, does he? 196 00:09:27,593 --> 00:09:29,510 Do you know anything about Dr. Zaius 197 00:09:29,511 --> 00:09:31,261 and the theft of MacGuffin's "Thumb"? 198 00:09:33,481 --> 00:09:36,649 If you'll excuse me, I have to, uh... 199 00:09:36,651 --> 00:09:39,235 I have to use the restroom. 200 00:09:40,822 --> 00:09:42,989 Let's spread out. 201 00:09:42,991 --> 00:09:45,775 202 00:09:45,777 --> 00:09:48,111 [Zipper opens] 203 00:09:48,113 --> 00:09:50,330 [Urinating] 204 00:10:03,206 --> 00:10:04,572 Tribeca, get over here. 205 00:10:04,574 --> 00:10:05,873 On my way. 206 00:10:06,424 --> 00:10:07,502 What's up? 207 00:10:10,213 --> 00:10:11,746 MacGuffin's "Thumb." 208 00:10:11,748 --> 00:10:13,248 [Toilet flushes] 209 00:10:13,250 --> 00:10:15,300 If you'll excuse me, uh, 210 00:10:15,302 --> 00:10:17,085 all my roommates are about to show up, so I... 211 00:10:17,087 --> 00:10:18,970 - You son of a bitch! - Aah! 212 00:10:18,972 --> 00:10:20,338 Whoa! 213 00:10:20,340 --> 00:10:21,889 You're under arrest for grand theft art-o. 214 00:10:21,891 --> 00:10:23,174 It's not what you think. 215 00:10:23,176 --> 00:10:24,225 Give me a reason! 216 00:10:24,227 --> 00:10:25,810 - [Grunts] - I dare you. 217 00:10:25,812 --> 00:10:27,345 He just took a painting. It's not that big of a deal. 218 00:10:27,347 --> 00:10:29,514 Don't tell me how to do my job! 219 00:10:29,516 --> 00:10:30,682 - Ohh! - Give me a reason! 220 00:10:30,684 --> 00:10:32,233 - [Bones crack] - I dare you! 221 00:10:32,235 --> 00:10:33,568 Ohh! Aah! 222 00:10:39,364 --> 00:10:41,489 Things got a little heated back there, huh? 223 00:10:41,561 --> 00:10:43,278 I don't want to talk about it. 224 00:10:43,280 --> 00:10:46,147 You got to tell me what's going on with you and this case. 225 00:10:46,149 --> 00:10:48,232 You know we never solve it till you do. 226 00:10:49,986 --> 00:10:51,786 [Sighs] 227 00:10:51,788 --> 00:10:55,657 I was a young art student living in Paris. 228 00:10:55,659 --> 00:10:57,825 - I was living in the French quarter. - [Parisian music plays] 229 00:10:57,827 --> 00:11:00,328 I was just getting out of a relationship. 230 00:11:08,338 --> 00:11:11,139 That was the worst first date I ever had. 231 00:11:12,559 --> 00:11:15,176 I needed someone who wanted the things that I wanted. 232 00:11:16,513 --> 00:11:21,015 And that was Carpaccio MacGuffin. 233 00:11:21,817 --> 00:11:26,154 It was exciting, exhilarating. 234 00:11:27,357 --> 00:11:31,526 We did things I never dreamed of. 235 00:11:31,528 --> 00:11:37,615 He was loving, considerate, thoughtful... 236 00:11:37,617 --> 00:11:39,834 sensuous. 237 00:11:41,087 --> 00:11:43,838 I knew I had to get out of there. 238 00:11:46,710 --> 00:11:50,178 I loved him, but I knew I couldn't stay 239 00:11:50,180 --> 00:11:54,215 because that's what I do... I leave. 240 00:12:12,402 --> 00:12:15,203 So that was the inspiration for the "Thumb." 241 00:12:15,205 --> 00:12:16,821 Amazing. 242 00:12:16,823 --> 00:12:18,706 You think maybe you leave people before they leave you? 243 00:12:18,708 --> 00:12:20,742 [Mockingly] You think maybe you leave people 244 00:12:20,744 --> 00:12:21,715 before they leave you? 245 00:12:21,815 --> 00:12:23,364 All right, fine. Forget it. 246 00:12:23,366 --> 00:12:25,033 Let's just put Randy away. 247 00:12:25,035 --> 00:12:26,150 It's up here on the right, 248 00:12:26,152 --> 00:12:27,702 where it says "Police Precinct." 249 00:12:27,704 --> 00:12:29,954 Okay, I got it. 250 00:12:32,876 --> 00:12:34,209 Turn to the right. 251 00:12:35,745 --> 00:12:36,745 [Camera shutter clicks] 252 00:12:36,746 --> 00:12:38,580 Turn to the left. 253 00:12:40,050 --> 00:12:41,416 [Camera shutter clicks] 254 00:12:41,418 --> 00:12:44,002 All right. Let's bring in the whole family. 255 00:12:44,004 --> 00:12:45,420 Come on in. Come on in, Betts. 256 00:12:45,422 --> 00:12:47,922 Okay, y'all ready? At the count of three, "Cheese." 257 00:12:47,924 --> 00:12:50,592 - One, two, three! "Cheese!" - [Camera shutter clicks] 258 00:12:51,940 --> 00:12:53,271 You wanted to see us, Doctor? 259 00:12:53,371 --> 00:12:56,038 Ah, good evening, Detectives! 260 00:12:56,040 --> 00:12:57,540 I took a look at that painting you recovered 261 00:12:57,542 --> 00:12:59,425 from Randy Zaius' apartment. 262 00:12:59,426 --> 00:13:01,209 A genuine MacGuffin, eh? 263 00:13:01,212 --> 00:13:02,461 [Laughing] 264 00:13:08,219 --> 00:13:09,886 We don't know why you're laughing, sir. 265 00:13:09,888 --> 00:13:11,771 No. Of course. How could you? 266 00:13:11,773 --> 00:13:13,578 You're not inside my head. Now, let me show you something. 267 00:13:13,578 --> 00:13:16,914 Now, here we have Leonardo Da Vinci's "Mona Lisa," 268 00:13:17,118 --> 00:13:20,319 which we had FedExed in from the Louvre Museum in Paris. 269 00:13:20,321 --> 00:13:23,823 And here... [Grunts] 270 00:13:23,825 --> 00:13:28,911 Here we have a cheap forgery on loan from a cheap forgery store. 271 00:13:28,913 --> 00:13:30,546 Or is it? 272 00:13:30,548 --> 00:13:32,665 Could this be the real "Mona Lisa" 273 00:13:32,667 --> 00:13:34,583 and could this be the forgery? 274 00:13:34,585 --> 00:13:36,585 Real, forge. Forge, real. 275 00:13:36,587 --> 00:13:38,471 Follow the bouncing ball. Which is it? 276 00:13:38,473 --> 00:13:41,640 - I can tell them apart. - Oh, really, Detective? 277 00:13:41,642 --> 00:13:43,642 Then why don't you pull out your big gun 278 00:13:43,644 --> 00:13:45,678 and shoot the forgery? 279 00:13:45,680 --> 00:13:47,763 Great. 280 00:13:49,400 --> 00:13:50,599 Wrong, Detective. 281 00:13:50,601 --> 00:13:52,601 You've just shot the real "Mona Lisa" 282 00:13:52,603 --> 00:13:55,104 and the lab technician standing behind it. 283 00:13:55,106 --> 00:13:56,572 [Grunts] 284 00:13:56,574 --> 00:13:58,941 You tricked me. I'm not paying for that. 285 00:13:58,943 --> 00:14:00,442 They're both forgeries. 286 00:14:00,444 --> 00:14:03,362 Exactly, Tribeca. They are both forgeries. 287 00:14:03,364 --> 00:14:06,532 Look at the cheap canvas, the amateur brushstrokes, 288 00:14:06,534 --> 00:14:08,701 the lack of contrast between light and dark, 289 00:14:08,703 --> 00:14:11,086 the stickers that say "75 cents." 290 00:14:11,088 --> 00:14:13,589 Ah. [Chuckles] [Claps] 291 00:14:13,591 --> 00:14:15,958 At last, someone who knows something about art. 292 00:14:15,960 --> 00:14:17,261 What's the point of all this, Doctor? 293 00:14:17,361 --> 00:14:18,527 The point? 294 00:14:18,529 --> 00:14:19,861 The point? 295 00:14:19,863 --> 00:14:21,363 Ooh, I love an inquiring mind. 296 00:14:21,365 --> 00:14:23,448 Let's have another look at your so-called MacGuffin, 297 00:14:23,450 --> 00:14:25,200 shall we? 298 00:14:28,512 --> 00:14:29,588 Oh, my god. 299 00:14:29,590 --> 00:14:30,705 How did I miss this? 300 00:14:30,707 --> 00:14:34,543 Yeah, how did you miss this? It's so obvious. 301 00:14:34,545 --> 00:14:35,961 Why is it obvious? 302 00:14:35,963 --> 00:14:37,796 It's obvious that it's a forgery, 303 00:14:37,798 --> 00:14:39,181 although a brilliant one. 304 00:14:39,183 --> 00:14:40,932 The canvas is authentic to the period. 305 00:14:40,934 --> 00:14:42,184 The brushstrokes are exact. 306 00:14:42,186 --> 00:14:45,136 It's absolutely indistinguishable from the original. 307 00:14:45,138 --> 00:14:46,638 Except for the fact 308 00:14:46,640 --> 00:14:48,523 that MacGuffin was crying when he painted the "Thumb," 309 00:14:48,525 --> 00:14:51,560 and the tears diluted the paint in the bottom-right corner. 310 00:14:51,562 --> 00:14:54,279 Exactly. As you can see, no tears. 311 00:14:54,281 --> 00:14:57,816 So Randy forged the "Thumb," but why? 312 00:14:57,818 --> 00:15:00,535 313 00:15:05,475 --> 00:15:07,475 314 00:15:07,477 --> 00:15:10,045 [Chuckles] 315 00:15:10,047 --> 00:15:12,214 How's jail treating you, Randy? 316 00:15:12,216 --> 00:15:15,016 You literally brought me in here five minutes ago. 317 00:15:15,018 --> 00:15:17,869 Yeah, time goes slow in the joint, doesn't it? 318 00:15:17,871 --> 00:15:19,454 [Chuckles] 319 00:15:19,456 --> 00:15:22,791 The painting we got from your apartment is a forgery, 320 00:15:22,793 --> 00:15:26,494 which begs the question... where's the original? 321 00:15:26,496 --> 00:15:29,664 Look, I'll tell you everything you need to know. 322 00:15:29,666 --> 00:15:32,050 But first, I want immunity. 323 00:15:32,052 --> 00:15:35,337 Immunity? That's what you want, huh? 324 00:15:35,339 --> 00:15:38,757 [Laughing] 325 00:15:39,883 --> 00:15:42,093 - You allergic to eggs? - Uh, no. 326 00:15:42,095 --> 00:15:43,478 - Okay. - Go ahead. 327 00:15:43,480 --> 00:15:45,981 - Ow. - [Exhales sharply] 328 00:15:45,983 --> 00:15:47,349 That wasn't so bad. 329 00:15:47,351 --> 00:15:50,018 - Now, where's the "Thumb"? - My brother has it. 330 00:15:50,020 --> 00:15:52,187 He steals the art, and then I forge it. 331 00:15:52,189 --> 00:15:54,189 He returns the forgeries back to the art gallery, 332 00:15:54,291 --> 00:15:56,358 and the police drop the whole thing. 333 00:15:56,360 --> 00:15:58,860 He ends up with a multimillion-dollar art collection. 334 00:15:58,862 --> 00:16:00,528 Why roll on him now? 335 00:16:00,530 --> 00:16:03,915 [Voice breaking] Because he's a total... 336 00:16:03,917 --> 00:16:05,500 Dick! [Cries] 337 00:16:05,572 --> 00:16:07,939 You don't have to deal with him no more, 338 00:16:07,942 --> 00:16:11,494 'cause we are about to take Dr. Zaius down. 339 00:16:11,495 --> 00:16:13,028 [Gasps] 340 00:16:13,030 --> 00:16:14,829 Now, you're free to go. 341 00:16:14,831 --> 00:16:17,949 [Grunts] Can someone un-cuff me? 342 00:16:17,951 --> 00:16:19,918 You're not cuffed. 343 00:16:21,621 --> 00:16:24,456 Oh. Great. Thanks. 344 00:16:24,458 --> 00:16:26,124 You can validate your parking on the way out. 345 00:16:26,126 --> 00:16:29,377 - Thanks, man. - Yeah. No problem. 346 00:16:32,934 --> 00:16:34,934 - Don't move, Dr. Zaius! - [Thud] 347 00:16:34,935 --> 00:16:37,135 You idiot! Do you see what you've done?! 348 00:16:37,137 --> 00:16:39,137 That was a priceless Moravian vase. 349 00:16:39,139 --> 00:16:41,139 It will take you a lifetime to pay... 350 00:16:41,141 --> 00:16:43,692 It seems to be fine. How can I help you? 351 00:16:43,694 --> 00:16:46,111 You're under arrest for stealing MacGuffin's "Thumb" 352 00:16:46,113 --> 00:16:47,812 from the Olsen-Medavoy Gallery. 353 00:16:47,814 --> 00:16:49,114 Your brother ratted you out. 354 00:16:49,116 --> 00:16:51,399 Don't be ridiculous. I haven't stolen anything. 355 00:16:51,401 --> 00:16:54,452 Then how do you explain this? 356 00:16:54,454 --> 00:16:56,654 I have no idea how that got there. 357 00:16:56,656 --> 00:16:58,156 I'm being framed! 358 00:16:58,158 --> 00:17:00,325 Officer, take him away. 359 00:17:00,327 --> 00:17:03,745 360 00:17:03,747 --> 00:17:05,163 We did it. 361 00:17:05,165 --> 00:17:07,716 Now let's get this thing back to a museum, 362 00:17:07,718 --> 00:17:09,501 where it belongs. 363 00:17:09,503 --> 00:17:11,336 Everyone freeze! 364 00:17:12,005 --> 00:17:14,089 You're out. Go sit down. 365 00:17:15,008 --> 00:17:18,343 Un-freeze. 366 00:17:18,345 --> 00:17:21,846 No tears. This one's a forgery, too. 367 00:17:21,848 --> 00:17:23,264 Damn it. 368 00:17:23,267 --> 00:17:25,434 But Randy said that Zaius had the original. 369 00:17:25,435 --> 00:17:27,652 What, did he pull some kind of switcheroo? 370 00:17:27,654 --> 00:17:29,437 [Both gasp] 371 00:17:29,439 --> 00:17:32,690 - Switcheroo! - Switcheroo! 372 00:17:32,692 --> 00:17:34,692 373 00:17:35,195 --> 00:17:39,415 Randy Zaius, L.A.P.D.! Open the door! 374 00:17:39,416 --> 00:17:40,448 Take it down. 375 00:17:43,170 --> 00:17:46,454 Go! Go! Go! 376 00:17:46,456 --> 00:17:49,040 - Man: Go! Go! - Man 2: Keep it moving! Let's go! 377 00:17:50,343 --> 00:17:53,128 Come on! Let's go! Go, go, go! 378 00:18:06,893 --> 00:18:08,226 [Static] 379 00:18:08,228 --> 00:18:10,445 It's Tanner. He isn't here. 380 00:18:10,447 --> 00:18:12,230 [Randy sneezes] 381 00:18:12,983 --> 00:18:14,649 [Screams] 382 00:18:14,651 --> 00:18:17,202 - Get him! - [Indistinct shouting] 383 00:18:17,204 --> 00:18:19,487 [Punches landing] 384 00:18:26,580 --> 00:18:28,963 You know, my first apartment out of the academy 385 00:18:28,965 --> 00:18:30,915 was way smaller than this one. 386 00:18:30,917 --> 00:18:32,217 You don't say? 387 00:18:32,219 --> 00:18:34,886 10 guys crammed into a 24-story walk-up. 388 00:18:34,888 --> 00:18:37,422 And you know what the biggest pain in the butt was? 389 00:18:37,424 --> 00:18:38,673 [Screaming] 390 00:18:38,675 --> 00:18:41,593 Ohh! 391 00:18:41,595 --> 00:18:43,928 Opening the damn fridge. 392 00:18:43,930 --> 00:18:45,430 393 00:18:54,825 --> 00:19:00,078 It's Tanner. "Thumb's" up. 394 00:19:01,198 --> 00:19:02,530 All right. 395 00:19:02,532 --> 00:19:04,782 Looks like the "Thumb's" back up at the gallery. 396 00:19:04,784 --> 00:19:06,284 All right. 397 00:19:06,286 --> 00:19:08,119 I got to say you were pretty terrific back there. 398 00:19:08,121 --> 00:19:09,454 You weren't bad yourself. 399 00:19:09,456 --> 00:19:11,589 I feel like we're really finding our groove. 400 00:19:11,591 --> 00:19:12,624 Mm-hmm. 401 00:19:13,935 --> 00:19:15,318 My mom was right. 402 00:19:15,320 --> 00:19:17,854 When you meet the right partner, you just know. 403 00:19:17,857 --> 00:19:19,824 - Mm-hmm. - In fact, you should meet my mom. 404 00:19:19,826 --> 00:19:22,076 - I've already told her so much about you. - Hmm. 405 00:19:22,078 --> 00:19:23,646 Is it weird we don't have more pictures together? 406 00:19:23,746 --> 00:19:25,045 I got to get out of here. 407 00:19:27,394 --> 00:19:31,360 I'm not gonna let you run away from a good thing this time, Angie Tribeca. 408 00:19:31,363 --> 00:19:33,396 [Sighs] 409 00:19:34,866 --> 00:19:36,399 I got to go take a poop. 410 00:19:36,401 --> 00:19:41,321 411 00:19:44,752 --> 00:19:48,845 - synced and corrected by hawken45 / Chamallow - - www.addic7ed.com - 412 00:19:48,895 --> 00:19:53,445 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 30213

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