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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,000 --> 00:00:04,074 Subtitles downloaded from www.OpenSubtitles.org 2 00:00:05,805 --> 00:00:06,840 Kenneth, I'm gonna duck uptown 3 00:00:06,840 --> 00:00:07,874 and have lunch with my boyfriend. 4 00:00:07,874 --> 00:00:09,376 Yes, ma'am. 5 00:00:09,376 --> 00:00:11,911 Oh, is that code for some kind of older gal medical procedure? 6 00:00:11,911 --> 00:00:13,980 No, Kenneth, I really have a boyfriend. 7 00:00:13,980 --> 00:00:15,382 Look, he's handsome and a doctor. 8 00:00:15,382 --> 00:00:16,416 A doctor? 9 00:00:16,416 --> 00:00:18,151 Well, don't get too attached. 10 00:00:18,151 --> 00:00:20,420 As soon as people realize his tonics don't work 11 00:00:20,420 --> 00:00:21,755 it's on to the next town. 12 00:00:21,755 --> 00:00:24,758 Hey, Ken, you know what I have a craving for? 13 00:00:24,758 --> 00:00:26,760 Jerk chicken from that place in Mill Basin? 14 00:00:26,760 --> 00:00:28,495 And some... 15 00:00:28,495 --> 00:00:31,364 Catalog photos of expectant mothers in their swimming suits? 16 00:00:31,364 --> 00:00:33,833 You're my Radar O'Reilly, Ken. 17 00:00:33,833 --> 00:00:36,461 Now get in here and rub my feet till you hear a chopper coming. 18 00:00:38,538 --> 00:00:39,539 Lemon... 19 00:00:39,539 --> 00:00:41,007 How's Tracy? 20 00:00:41,007 --> 00:00:42,008 What's his mood? 21 00:00:42,008 --> 00:00:43,209 Oh, upbeat and confused. 22 00:00:43,209 --> 00:00:45,078 Oh, perfect. You know his contract is up. 23 00:00:45,078 --> 00:00:46,346 Has it been that long? 24 00:00:46,346 --> 00:00:48,515 Boy, we sure have done some crazy things with Tracy 25 00:00:48,515 --> 00:00:49,582 in the last three years. 26 00:00:49,582 --> 00:00:51,885 We sure have. 27 00:00:51,885 --> 00:00:54,854 I'm thinking about some of them now. 28 00:00:54,854 --> 00:00:57,023 Me too. 29 00:00:57,023 --> 00:00:59,192 Anyway, I'm handling the Tracy thing myself. 30 00:00:59,192 --> 00:01:01,428 Right, play hardball, get your business jollies. 31 00:01:01,428 --> 00:01:02,729 Oh, sadly, not this time. 32 00:01:02,729 --> 00:01:05,098 With Tracy, it's not about money anymore. 33 00:01:05,098 --> 00:01:07,300 His video game made a fortune and he invested all of it 34 00:01:07,300 --> 00:01:09,903 in a company that dismantles bank signs. 35 00:01:09,903 --> 00:01:11,137 They're doing very well. 36 00:01:11,137 --> 00:01:12,705 You don't think he's gonna leave, do you? 37 00:01:12,705 --> 00:01:14,340 Oh, don't worry. When you're above money 38 00:01:14,340 --> 00:01:16,810 personal relationships become your currency. 39 00:01:16,810 --> 00:01:19,370 Tracy and I have become, uh, quite close. 40 00:01:20,713 --> 00:01:22,215 Look, we got B.F.F. bracelets. 41 00:01:22,215 --> 00:01:23,616 You guys are best friends forever? 42 00:01:23,616 --> 00:01:24,981 That's not what that stands for. 43 00:01:26,920 --> 00:01:31,091 Why would you celebrate that? 44 00:01:31,091 --> 00:01:33,359 So tell me where you went to school again? 45 00:01:33,359 --> 00:01:34,627 Well, uh, I... 46 00:01:34,627 --> 00:01:35,728 Hey, you look really nice today. 47 00:01:35,728 --> 00:01:37,230 Thank you. 48 00:01:37,230 --> 00:01:38,665 Do you know her? 49 00:01:38,665 --> 00:01:40,800 No, I don't think so. 50 00:01:40,800 --> 00:01:42,936 Oh, wait! No, no! Uh, that's my car! 51 00:01:42,936 --> 00:01:44,137 Meter's expired. 52 00:01:44,137 --> 00:01:45,104 I forgot to get quarters. 53 00:01:47,006 --> 00:01:49,342 You know what? I got quarters. 54 00:01:49,342 --> 00:01:50,810 Thanks, Officer. 55 00:01:50,810 --> 00:01:52,745 You're welcome. 56 00:01:52,745 --> 00:01:55,215 Boy, people sure are nice to you. 57 00:01:55,215 --> 00:01:56,983 Yeah, I guess. 58 00:01:56,983 --> 00:01:58,685 Excuse me. I'm Calvin Klein 59 00:01:58,685 --> 00:02:01,921 and I think you should be my next underwear model. 60 00:02:01,921 --> 00:02:03,286 Whoa, thanks! 61 00:02:04,624 --> 00:02:06,826 You don't wanna get a card or... a phone number? 62 00:02:06,826 --> 00:02:08,259 He'll figure it out. 63 00:02:30,150 --> 00:02:31,351 Hey. 64 00:02:31,351 --> 00:02:32,886 You went to Plunder for lunch? 65 00:02:32,886 --> 00:02:34,020 How did you get a table? 66 00:02:34,020 --> 00:02:35,421 I don't know. 67 00:02:35,421 --> 00:02:37,390 It was packed but they just gave Drew a table. 68 00:02:37,390 --> 00:02:38,892 It is ridiculous how people treat him. 69 00:02:38,892 --> 00:02:41,995 The chef sent over food. Ladies sent drinks. 70 00:02:41,995 --> 00:02:44,063 Mayor Bloomberg asked him to dance. 71 00:02:44,063 --> 00:02:46,554 Well, beautiful people are treated differently from... 72 00:02:48,001 --> 00:02:49,068 moderately pleasant-looking people. 73 00:02:49,068 --> 00:02:50,236 It's true. 74 00:02:50,236 --> 00:02:51,471 They live in a bubble... 75 00:02:51,471 --> 00:02:53,406 a bubble of free drinks, kindness 76 00:02:53,406 --> 00:02:54,674 and outdoor sex. 77 00:02:54,674 --> 00:02:56,342 How did Drew turn out as well as he did 78 00:02:56,342 --> 00:02:57,644 going through life like that? 79 00:02:57,644 --> 00:02:59,212 The bubble isnit always a bad thing. Look at me. 80 00:02:59,212 --> 00:03:00,580 I turned out okay, didn't I? 81 00:03:00,580 --> 00:03:03,550 Jack, I want you to pay close attention 82 00:03:03,550 --> 00:03:05,752 to the following over-the-top eye-roll. 83 00:03:05,752 --> 00:03:07,187 Oh, brother. 84 00:03:07,187 --> 00:03:10,323 Lemon, I don't share this often... 85 00:03:10,323 --> 00:03:11,858 but this is a photo of me 86 00:03:11,858 --> 00:03:13,860 when I was 25 years old. 87 00:03:13,860 --> 00:03:17,564 What the what?! You have a Superman chest! 88 00:03:17,564 --> 00:03:19,566 I know. 89 00:03:19,566 --> 00:03:22,101 Oh, my God, the lady will have two tickets to the gun show! 90 00:03:22,101 --> 00:03:23,770 And your eyes were so much bluer. 91 00:03:23,770 --> 00:03:25,104 What happened to your eyes? 92 00:03:25,104 --> 00:03:27,674 My point is, Lemon, the bubble doesn't last forever. 93 00:03:27,674 --> 00:03:31,077 So get in there with Drew and enjoy those perks while you can. 94 00:03:31,077 --> 00:03:32,245 Can I keep that? 95 00:03:32,245 --> 00:03:35,544 Uh, no. It's my only copy. 96 00:03:38,585 --> 00:03:40,353 Everyone, gather 'round, please. 97 00:03:40,353 --> 00:03:42,789 Actor announcement. As you probably know 98 00:03:42,789 --> 00:03:46,092 especially if you read page six... of my publicist's e-mails 99 00:03:46,092 --> 00:03:49,295 I have decided to cut my hair and donate it to charity. 100 00:03:49,295 --> 00:03:52,131 But Miss Maroney, why would you cut your beautiful hair? 101 00:03:52,131 --> 00:03:53,700 You look just how 102 00:03:53,700 --> 00:03:55,602 I picture Mary Magdalene. 103 00:03:55,602 --> 00:03:57,070 Well, because, Kenneth, I am a selfless person 104 00:03:57,070 --> 00:03:58,738 who can't get arrested in this town. 105 00:03:58,738 --> 00:04:01,708 Meanwhile, Tracy Jordan's face is everywhere. 106 00:04:01,708 --> 00:04:03,176 Jenna, I already explained that. 107 00:04:03,176 --> 00:04:04,577 That was a police sketch of a flasher who happened 108 00:04:04,577 --> 00:04:06,546 to look like Tracy... we hope. 109 00:04:06,546 --> 00:04:07,981 Whatever. He's hogging the buzz. 110 00:04:07,981 --> 00:04:09,048 You've got buzz. 111 00:04:09,048 --> 00:04:10,675 You were in that magazine that time. 112 00:04:14,020 --> 00:04:15,955 I don't even know what you're referring to 113 00:04:15,955 --> 00:04:16,944 and that was two years ago. 114 00:04:18,258 --> 00:04:20,860 As usual, I have to create my own opportunities. 115 00:04:20,860 --> 00:04:23,129 No one will be talking about Tracy Jordan this Friday 116 00:04:23,129 --> 00:04:25,563 when I cut my hair off on The Today Show. 117 00:04:28,034 --> 00:04:30,332 You're what I think Judas looks like. 118 00:04:32,472 --> 00:04:35,642 Tracy, I hope you know how much we value you here at T.G.S. 119 00:04:35,642 --> 00:04:38,044 I like to think of this staff... 120 00:04:38,044 --> 00:04:39,479 as a family. 121 00:04:39,479 --> 00:04:41,047 This is better than a family. 122 00:04:41,047 --> 00:04:43,683 No one around here asks me for my damn bone marrow. 123 00:04:43,683 --> 00:04:46,052 Well, why don't we make this easy on ourselves 124 00:04:46,052 --> 00:04:47,387 and renew your existing contract 125 00:04:47,387 --> 00:04:50,823 with a 3% increase. 126 00:04:52,325 --> 00:04:53,383 Okay. 127 00:04:54,661 --> 00:04:56,195 Sorry it took me so long to answer. 128 00:04:56,195 --> 00:04:59,132 I was just thinking about how weird it is that we eat birds. 129 00:04:59,132 --> 00:05:01,067 All right, we have a deal. 130 00:05:01,067 --> 00:05:02,735 You see how easy negotiating can be 131 00:05:02,735 --> 00:05:04,203 when it's not really about money. 132 00:05:04,203 --> 00:05:06,739 How is this really not about money? 133 00:05:06,739 --> 00:05:08,875 Well, obviously you don't need to work. 134 00:05:08,875 --> 00:05:10,677 What's that now, Charles? 135 00:05:10,677 --> 00:05:13,146 I'm just saying, you made $300 million 136 00:05:13,146 --> 00:05:14,881 Iast year, so there's no financial need 137 00:05:14,881 --> 00:05:16,816 for you to continue with the show but... 138 00:05:16,816 --> 00:05:19,352 I never thought of it like that. 139 00:05:19,352 --> 00:05:20,887 Thank you. 140 00:05:20,887 --> 00:05:23,222 I quit. Good-bye. 141 00:05:23,222 --> 00:05:25,591 Uh... Tracy? 142 00:05:25,591 --> 00:05:29,028 Had he really not put that together? 143 00:05:29,028 --> 00:05:31,898 Tracy's is a tactile-kinesthetic learning style... 144 00:05:31,898 --> 00:05:35,163 Dotcom... so help me God. 145 00:05:38,571 --> 00:05:41,040 It's nice of those guys to give up their court for us. 146 00:05:41,040 --> 00:05:42,701 Yes... for us. 147 00:05:45,345 --> 00:05:49,248 So I should probably warn you, I was pro in college. 148 00:05:49,248 --> 00:05:50,850 What? 149 00:05:50,850 --> 00:05:53,753 Yeah, I started teaching kids at the Y and then all their mothers 150 00:05:53,753 --> 00:05:54,887 wanted to take private lessons from me. 151 00:05:54,887 --> 00:05:56,377 But I promise I'll take it easy on you. 152 00:06:15,708 --> 00:06:18,044 It's been a long time since college, huh? 153 00:06:18,044 --> 00:06:19,545 What do you mean? 154 00:06:19,545 --> 00:06:20,546 Excuse me... 155 00:06:20,546 --> 00:06:22,070 do you give lessons? 156 00:06:30,890 --> 00:06:32,625 Now what is this? 157 00:06:32,625 --> 00:06:35,128 Dr. Drew's salmon bourguignon. 158 00:06:35,128 --> 00:06:37,230 What is this orange-y taste? 159 00:06:37,230 --> 00:06:38,219 Gatorade. 160 00:06:46,973 --> 00:06:48,531 Yeah. 161 00:06:49,909 --> 00:06:51,069 That was awesome. 162 00:07:00,887 --> 00:07:02,655 Are you choking? Are you choking? 163 00:07:02,655 --> 00:07:04,290 I'm a doctor. Stay calm, stay calm. 164 00:07:04,290 --> 00:07:05,848 I just need... I just need to shake it loose. 165 00:07:07,593 --> 00:07:08,694 Wait, donit panic. I just need 166 00:07:08,694 --> 00:07:09,762 to find something to push it down with. 167 00:07:09,762 --> 00:07:10,797 Do you have a chopstick 168 00:07:10,797 --> 00:07:13,132 or a fireplace match or something? 169 00:07:14,700 --> 00:07:17,032 There ya go! 170 00:07:20,440 --> 00:07:22,642 Jack, there you are. 171 00:07:22,642 --> 00:07:24,944 I need to talk to you about something. 172 00:07:24,944 --> 00:07:27,547 The Tracy deal is a process, Lemon. We are... in process. 173 00:07:27,547 --> 00:07:29,549 No, something happened with Drew. 174 00:07:29,549 --> 00:07:30,550 Oh no, he's not a B.F.F.? 175 00:07:30,550 --> 00:07:32,185 Ugh, no! Never! 176 00:07:32,185 --> 00:07:33,553 It's the bubble. 177 00:07:33,553 --> 00:07:36,022 He is a doctor who doesn't know the Heimlich Maneuver. 178 00:07:36,022 --> 00:07:38,024 He can't play tennis, he can't cook... 179 00:07:38,024 --> 00:07:42,028 he's as bad at sex as I am. But he has no idea! 180 00:07:42,028 --> 00:07:43,930 That is the danger of being super-handsome. 181 00:07:43,930 --> 00:07:45,832 When you're in the bubble, nobody ever tells you the truth. 182 00:07:45,832 --> 00:07:47,200 For years... 183 00:07:47,200 --> 00:07:48,568 I thought I spoke excellent French. 184 00:07:51,237 --> 00:07:53,739 Drew deserves to be told the truth. 185 00:07:53,739 --> 00:07:55,374 He's a good person 186 00:07:55,374 --> 00:07:59,479 who is a victim of our nation's obscene cult of superficiality. 187 00:07:59,479 --> 00:08:02,648 Okay, Lemon, did you tell him that he was no good in tennis? 188 00:08:02,648 --> 00:08:03,916 No, I let him win 189 00:08:03,916 --> 00:08:04,917 'cause I wanted to make out with him in the cab. 190 00:08:04,917 --> 00:08:07,820 It's not fair 191 00:08:07,820 --> 00:08:09,222 to let Drew live a lie. 192 00:08:09,222 --> 00:08:10,523 And I think I'm the woman to fix him. 193 00:08:10,523 --> 00:08:11,991 Be careful, Lemon. 194 00:08:11,991 --> 00:08:14,894 You wake a sleepwalker, you risk getting urinated on. 195 00:08:14,894 --> 00:08:17,328 Or thanked... on. 196 00:08:18,865 --> 00:08:19,866 Hey, Kenneth! 197 00:08:19,866 --> 00:08:21,200 Mr. Jordan quit! 198 00:08:21,200 --> 00:08:22,690 What? 199 00:08:23,836 --> 00:08:25,004 I thought you were "in process." 200 00:08:25,004 --> 00:08:26,873 Tracy is taking a strong position right now 201 00:08:26,873 --> 00:08:27,940 in the negotiation. 202 00:08:27,940 --> 00:08:29,242 It's not unheard of for him 203 00:08:29,242 --> 00:08:31,244 to stay home while I formulate my counter-proposal. 204 00:08:31,244 --> 00:08:32,411 What if it doesn't work? 205 00:08:32,411 --> 00:08:34,313 What if he doesn't come back? 206 00:08:34,313 --> 00:08:36,716 Oh, no! When I get upset 207 00:08:36,716 --> 00:08:37,876 my accent come out. 208 00:08:38,885 --> 00:08:41,513 And when it gets to comin' out, I can't get to talkin', nuh-uh! 209 00:08:42,922 --> 00:08:44,223 Jack, I have a show on Friday. 210 00:08:44,223 --> 00:08:46,125 It will be rectified. 211 00:08:46,125 --> 00:08:47,193 I didn't mean to upset you, Miss Lemon. 212 00:08:47,193 --> 00:08:48,928 Mr. Donaghy told us not to tell you 213 00:08:48,928 --> 00:08:50,263 but I couldn't hold it in any more. 214 00:08:50,263 --> 00:08:53,027 Wait a minute, are you hiding your screw-up from me? 215 00:08:54,567 --> 00:08:55,935 Don't cling to this, Lemon. 216 00:08:55,935 --> 00:08:58,571 Be a manager. Control your people. 217 00:08:58,571 --> 00:09:00,106 Buy better clothes. 218 00:09:00,106 --> 00:09:02,108 I'm allowing this because I made a misstep. 219 00:09:02,108 --> 00:09:04,977 I'm handling it, and Tracy will be here by Friday night. 220 00:09:04,977 --> 00:09:06,512 Just get it done. 221 00:09:06,512 --> 00:09:08,002 Nope, I lost it, that was Batman. 222 00:09:11,617 --> 00:09:14,787 Thank you, Team Jenna, for being here. 223 00:09:14,787 --> 00:09:17,156 Obviously, my Today Show charity haircut is just 224 00:09:17,156 --> 00:09:18,958 the first step in my reinvention. 225 00:09:18,958 --> 00:09:20,793 This is serial killer language. 226 00:09:20,793 --> 00:09:22,828 My mother's boyfriend raised me to believe that a woman's hair 227 00:09:22,828 --> 00:09:24,530 is her crowning glory. 228 00:09:24,530 --> 00:09:26,265 A haircut can make or break a career. 229 00:09:26,265 --> 00:09:28,100 Before "The Rachel," Jennifer Aniston was just 230 00:09:28,100 --> 00:09:30,002 a chunky nobody who couldn't get a job. 231 00:09:30,002 --> 00:09:31,637 Wasn't she already on Friends? 232 00:09:31,637 --> 00:09:33,239 Richard Esposito, move to the back. 233 00:09:33,239 --> 00:09:35,308 But if I make the wrong choice 234 00:09:35,308 --> 00:09:38,110 I could end up like Keri Russell, Felicity, season two. 235 00:09:38,110 --> 00:09:39,412 Okay, let's brainstorm. 236 00:09:39,412 --> 00:09:41,681 Everyone shout out words that describe my beauty. 237 00:09:41,681 --> 00:09:42,748 Fading. 238 00:09:42,748 --> 00:09:43,749 '80s. 239 00:09:43,749 --> 00:09:44,716 1880s. 240 00:09:46,652 --> 00:09:48,254 Hey, you needed me? 241 00:09:48,254 --> 00:09:50,122 Lemon, you know Rick from accounting. 242 00:09:50,122 --> 00:09:51,157 I don't. Hi. 243 00:09:51,157 --> 00:09:52,458 Hi, nice to meet you. 244 00:09:52,458 --> 00:09:55,761 I've arranged for one of Tracy's childhood idols 245 00:09:55,761 --> 00:09:58,631 to reach out to him. 246 00:10:00,800 --> 00:10:01,834 Hello? 247 00:10:01,834 --> 00:10:03,135 Tracy, this is Jack. 248 00:10:03,135 --> 00:10:05,037 I have someone here who wants to speak with you. 249 00:10:05,037 --> 00:10:07,039 Tracy, this is Bill Cosby. 250 00:10:07,039 --> 00:10:08,941 Really? This is your strategy? 251 00:10:08,941 --> 00:10:10,309 I heard him do this at a party. 252 00:10:10,309 --> 00:10:13,145 I want you to come back to the T.G.S. for the people 253 00:10:13,145 --> 00:10:15,047 who like the jokes and the things. 254 00:10:15,047 --> 00:10:17,950 Bill Cosby, you got a lot of nerve getting on the phone 255 00:10:17,950 --> 00:10:20,186 with me after what you did to my Aunt Paulette. 256 00:10:20,186 --> 00:10:22,655 I think you're confusing me with someone else. 257 00:10:22,655 --> 00:10:25,625 1971, Cincinnati. 258 00:10:25,625 --> 00:10:27,693 She was the cocktail waitress with the droopy eye. 259 00:10:27,693 --> 00:10:29,795 I'm the guy with the pudding... 260 00:10:29,795 --> 00:10:31,597 Try to tell me what to do? 261 00:10:31,597 --> 00:10:32,898 Dr. Heathcliff Huxtable... 262 00:10:32,898 --> 00:10:35,668 with your light-ass kids! 263 00:10:35,668 --> 00:10:37,937 Jack? Why would you make me talk to this man? 264 00:10:37,937 --> 00:10:39,739 Uh, Tracy, don't hang up. 265 00:10:39,739 --> 00:10:41,540 Tracy, this is Billy Dee Williams. 266 00:10:41,540 --> 00:10:43,175 I just wanna say I love your work. 267 00:10:43,175 --> 00:10:45,200 It's very smooth. 268 00:10:54,854 --> 00:10:55,921 Hey, sorry I'm late. 269 00:10:55,921 --> 00:10:57,657 Why are you waiting here? 270 00:10:57,657 --> 00:11:00,026 Well, I put our name in, but it's gonna be a 45-minute wait. 271 00:11:00,026 --> 00:11:02,561 What? I'll go talk to the hostess. 272 00:11:02,561 --> 00:11:05,164 No. I want to show you something. 273 00:11:05,164 --> 00:11:07,166 We're going to wait for the table. 274 00:11:07,166 --> 00:11:08,758 Okay. 275 00:11:10,436 --> 00:11:12,605 I hate this. 276 00:11:12,605 --> 00:11:15,708 Yeah, this is gonna be unpleasant. 277 00:11:15,708 --> 00:11:18,177 As Tracy's family and inner circle 278 00:11:18,177 --> 00:11:19,879 I wanted to enlist your help. 279 00:11:19,879 --> 00:11:22,581 While I'm sure all of you treasure him being home more... 280 00:11:22,581 --> 00:11:24,450 I'm sorry, you want our help? 281 00:11:24,450 --> 00:11:25,718 With your problem? 282 00:11:25,718 --> 00:11:27,853 Donaghy, you need to get our father back to work. 283 00:11:27,853 --> 00:11:29,422 That's what I'm trying to do. 284 00:11:29,422 --> 00:11:31,356 You wanna see what he packed me for lunch today? 285 00:11:32,425 --> 00:11:35,861 Mayonnaise... and a pack of cigarettes. 286 00:11:35,861 --> 00:11:37,096 That is unfortunate. 287 00:11:37,096 --> 00:11:39,965 He set up a home recording studio in our rec room! 288 00:11:39,965 --> 00:11:42,635 # My girl has a fat neck? 289 00:11:42,635 --> 00:11:44,637 I'm sharp, let's do it again. 290 00:11:44,637 --> 00:11:46,972 Thanks to you, I now have an unemployed father. 291 00:11:46,972 --> 00:11:49,608 You trying to make a stereotype out of me? 292 00:11:49,608 --> 00:11:51,110 Did you even vote for Obama? 293 00:11:51,110 --> 00:11:53,713 We've heard from Tracy Jr. Uh, where is your mother? 294 00:11:53,713 --> 00:11:56,015 She said she had to take a spa week at Canyon Ranch 295 00:11:56,015 --> 00:11:57,249 before my dad broke it in half. 296 00:11:57,249 --> 00:11:58,918 What that even supposed to mean? 297 00:11:58,918 --> 00:12:00,619 I shouldn't have to hear that! I'm a child! 298 00:12:00,619 --> 00:12:02,655 Tracy Jr., uh, George Foreman... 299 00:12:02,655 --> 00:12:04,156 I want to get your father back 300 00:12:04,156 --> 00:12:05,658 to work just as much as you do. 301 00:12:05,658 --> 00:12:07,359 But what do I offer the man who has everything? 302 00:12:07,359 --> 00:12:08,728 I don't know what to do. 303 00:12:08,728 --> 00:12:10,963 I didn't come here to hear more excuses. 304 00:12:10,963 --> 00:12:14,233 I came here to see the dumbest cracker in all of New York. 305 00:12:14,233 --> 00:12:16,335 You gotta fix this, Donaghy! Fix this! 306 00:12:16,335 --> 00:12:18,704 You know, I don't see it on the menu 307 00:12:18,704 --> 00:12:21,140 but I would love a catfish po'boy 308 00:12:21,140 --> 00:12:23,309 and a diet raspberry Fanta. 309 00:12:23,309 --> 00:12:24,410 Oh, that is a great idea. 310 00:12:24,410 --> 00:12:26,979 Let me order that for you. Excuse me... 311 00:12:26,979 --> 00:12:29,849 we will have a turkey burger deluxe and 312 00:12:29,849 --> 00:12:33,486 a catfish po'boy with a diet raspberry Fanta. 313 00:12:33,486 --> 00:12:35,287 I'm gonna come back in five minutes. 314 00:12:35,287 --> 00:12:36,756 You try to order off the menu again 315 00:12:36,756 --> 00:12:39,258 I will smack those glasses off your face. 316 00:12:39,258 --> 00:12:41,160 Okay, thank you. 317 00:12:41,160 --> 00:12:42,252 You're welcome. 318 00:12:43,863 --> 00:12:46,432 What was that? Why didn't she call you "sweetheart"? 319 00:12:46,432 --> 00:12:49,101 And where's the complimentary apps sampler? What's going on? 320 00:12:49,101 --> 00:12:52,036 Okay, Drew, this is how most people live. 321 00:12:53,472 --> 00:12:57,676 See, because of your whole, you know, Disney prince thing... 322 00:12:57,676 --> 00:12:59,211 Actually, they used footage of me from my high school swim team 323 00:12:59,211 --> 00:13:00,346 to draw Prince Eric. 324 00:13:00,346 --> 00:13:04,550 Right. Because of that, you live in a bubble 325 00:13:04,550 --> 00:13:06,118 where people do what you want 326 00:13:06,118 --> 00:13:07,653 and tell you what you wanna hear. 327 00:13:07,653 --> 00:13:09,155 Oh, I don't think that's true. 328 00:13:09,155 --> 00:13:10,890 Drew, I'm going to tell you this for your own good... 329 00:13:10,890 --> 00:13:13,325 you can't put Gatorade on salmon. 330 00:13:13,325 --> 00:13:14,693 Oh, yes, you can. 331 00:13:14,693 --> 00:13:16,128 The hot Italian lady from the Food Network told me so. 332 00:13:16,128 --> 00:13:18,397 Did she say it on TV? 333 00:13:18,397 --> 00:13:19,732 No, she said it to me 334 00:13:19,732 --> 00:13:22,134 when she jumped escalators to try to talk... 335 00:13:22,134 --> 00:13:23,567 Oh. 336 00:13:25,337 --> 00:13:26,739 Well, I don't wanna live that way. 337 00:13:26,739 --> 00:13:27,907 I don't want you to treat me that way. 338 00:13:27,907 --> 00:13:29,308 Are you sure? 339 00:13:29,308 --> 00:13:30,910 Yeah, Liz, I'm an adult. 340 00:13:30,910 --> 00:13:33,276 You can be honest with me. I can take it. 341 00:13:42,087 --> 00:13:43,389 That's game. Your serve. 342 00:13:43,389 --> 00:13:45,289 That's it! I quit! 343 00:13:46,392 --> 00:13:48,121 This racket is a fart and you cheat! 344 00:13:49,361 --> 00:13:50,350 You're a cheating bitch! 345 00:13:55,601 --> 00:13:59,071 Kenneth, I need your help. 346 00:13:59,071 --> 00:14:00,372 You know Tracy quite well 347 00:14:00,372 --> 00:14:01,707 wouldn't you say? 348 00:14:01,707 --> 00:14:03,142 Oh, I know Mr. Jordan 349 00:14:03,142 --> 00:14:05,277 Iike the back of my stepfather Ron's hand. 350 00:14:05,277 --> 00:14:07,279 I know all his A.T.M. P.I.N. codes. 351 00:14:07,279 --> 00:14:09,281 I know when he's cranky and needs his binky. 352 00:14:09,281 --> 00:14:10,583 I know that by "binky" 353 00:14:10,583 --> 00:14:12,585 he means 1 970s pornography. 354 00:14:12,585 --> 00:14:15,054 So how is he functioning without you? 355 00:14:15,054 --> 00:14:17,289 Oh, I'm still doing everything for him. 356 00:14:17,289 --> 00:14:19,291 Uh, tonight I have to ride my bike over to his house 357 00:14:19,291 --> 00:14:21,627 in New Jersey to hold his hand during Lost. 358 00:14:21,627 --> 00:14:23,356 That's it! Kenneth, don't you see? 359 00:14:24,563 --> 00:14:25,564 You're our ace in the hole. 360 00:14:25,564 --> 00:14:26,599 How dare you! 361 00:14:26,599 --> 00:14:28,334 You're what I've been looking for 362 00:14:28,334 --> 00:14:31,270 the one thing at T.G.S. that Tracy cannot live without. 363 00:14:31,270 --> 00:14:32,972 Now, Kenneth, I need you 364 00:14:32,972 --> 00:14:35,040 to cut Tracy off completely. 365 00:14:35,040 --> 00:14:37,209 Oh, I don't know if I could do that. 366 00:14:37,209 --> 00:14:38,410 You want him to come back, don't you? 367 00:14:38,410 --> 00:14:39,612 This is the only way. 368 00:14:40,713 --> 00:14:42,915 Don't answer that. It could be Tracy. 369 00:14:42,915 --> 00:14:45,017 But I have to answer the phones. 370 00:14:45,017 --> 00:14:46,075 That's my job. 371 00:14:50,456 --> 00:14:53,292 Hello, Studio 6-H. 372 00:14:53,292 --> 00:14:56,328 This is... Cranston. 373 00:14:56,328 --> 00:14:58,864 Oh, hey, Cranston. I was looking for Kenneth. 374 00:14:58,864 --> 00:15:00,733 He's not here. 375 00:15:00,733 --> 00:15:04,567 But I'm sure wherever he is, he loves you very much. 376 00:15:13,646 --> 00:15:15,180 Liz, you seem really stressed out. 377 00:15:15,180 --> 00:15:16,615 Do you wanna talk about what's going on? 378 00:15:16,615 --> 00:15:18,550 I just hope it's not a mistake. 379 00:15:18,550 --> 00:15:21,353 Well, maybe it is, but you have to listen to your heart. 380 00:15:21,353 --> 00:15:23,856 Yeah, but, why meddle with something that was great? 381 00:15:23,856 --> 00:15:25,858 Oh, Liz. It'll grow back. 382 00:15:25,858 --> 00:15:27,026 What? 383 00:15:27,026 --> 00:15:28,186 We're talking about my hair, right? 384 00:15:31,430 --> 00:15:35,834 # Fat-necked girl, let me count your neck rings? 385 00:15:35,834 --> 00:15:38,971 I'm thirsty! 386 00:15:38,971 --> 00:15:43,101 Family? Who's in charge of my thirst? 387 00:15:48,280 --> 00:15:52,217 Cranston, why hasn't Kenneth called me back yet? 388 00:15:52,217 --> 00:15:54,987 I miss him! 389 00:15:54,987 --> 00:15:59,048 Cranston... why are you crying? 390 00:16:00,559 --> 00:16:02,728 This is too hard, Mr. Donaghy. 391 00:16:02,728 --> 00:16:05,531 I cannot stand by while Mr. Jordan dies of dehydration 392 00:16:05,531 --> 00:16:07,123 in his recording studio. 393 00:16:08,867 --> 00:16:11,036 Plus, I've started to dream as Cranston. 394 00:16:11,036 --> 00:16:13,405 Kenneth, the more desperate Tracy becomes 395 00:16:13,405 --> 00:16:14,740 the more our plan is working. 396 00:16:14,740 --> 00:16:16,542 The next thing he'll do is show up here. 397 00:16:16,542 --> 00:16:18,344 He'll demand you go with him, you say no. 398 00:16:18,344 --> 00:16:20,679 Stay strong and he'll cave. 399 00:16:20,679 --> 00:16:22,114 Trust me. 400 00:16:22,114 --> 00:16:23,415 I hope you're right, Mr. Donaghy 401 00:16:23,415 --> 00:16:26,318 because you're playing with people's lives here. 402 00:16:26,318 --> 00:16:28,946 Don't you think I know that? 403 00:16:30,923 --> 00:16:33,726 We are back with sketch comedian, Jenna Maroney. 404 00:16:33,726 --> 00:16:35,627 Thank you, Meredith. But, please... 405 00:16:35,627 --> 00:16:36,729 I'm not a hero. 406 00:16:36,729 --> 00:16:38,163 I'm just trying to raise awareness that 407 00:16:38,163 --> 00:16:41,000 I'm more than just "that hot chick on Tracy Jordan's show." 408 00:16:41,000 --> 00:16:42,668 So, this is for Locks of Love? 409 00:16:42,668 --> 00:16:44,069 Oh, no, Locks of Love turned me down. 410 00:16:44,069 --> 00:16:45,204 They said my hair was 411 00:16:45,204 --> 00:16:46,271 too processed for a sick person to wear. 412 00:16:46,271 --> 00:16:47,773 But this is for a wonderful charity 413 00:16:47,773 --> 00:16:49,742 called Merkins of Hope. 414 00:16:49,742 --> 00:16:52,578 Okay, uh, let's make the big cut. 415 00:16:53,579 --> 00:16:55,114 So what about that crazy news 416 00:16:55,114 --> 00:16:56,115 that Tracy Jordan has quit T.G.S.? 417 00:16:56,115 --> 00:16:58,283 What? 418 00:16:58,283 --> 00:17:00,853 Oh, yeah. Word is he quit over a contract dispute. 419 00:17:00,853 --> 00:17:03,155 Guess you're the only star left on that show! 420 00:17:03,155 --> 00:17:04,390 No! No, stop! Stop cutting my hair! 421 00:17:04,390 --> 00:17:05,391 I don't need this anymore! 422 00:17:05,391 --> 00:17:06,892 Ugh! 423 00:17:06,892 --> 00:17:08,260 Oh, my God! 424 00:17:08,260 --> 00:17:10,558 It's okay, it's okay. I can fix this! 425 00:17:13,032 --> 00:17:15,367 Jack, is Tracy still not here? 426 00:17:15,367 --> 00:17:17,436 We have three hours before the show! 427 00:17:17,436 --> 00:17:19,805 Security told me that he's in the building, Pete. 428 00:17:19,805 --> 00:17:22,441 So it's working. 429 00:17:22,441 --> 00:17:24,243 Now it's all up to Kenneth Ellen Parcell. 430 00:17:24,243 --> 00:17:26,111 Hey, Ken. 431 00:17:26,111 --> 00:17:27,713 I've been calling you. 432 00:17:27,713 --> 00:17:29,648 Has Cranston not been giving you my messages? 433 00:17:29,648 --> 00:17:32,251 No, he told me. 434 00:17:32,251 --> 00:17:34,653 Yeah, well, don't worry. 435 00:17:34,653 --> 00:17:36,255 I just came to get a few of my things. 436 00:17:36,255 --> 00:17:38,519 And I won't bother you. 437 00:17:43,162 --> 00:17:45,798 All right, I guess that's everything. 438 00:17:45,798 --> 00:17:49,468 But I want you to know, if I walk out that door 439 00:17:49,468 --> 00:17:50,969 Ken, I'm not gonna call again. 440 00:17:50,969 --> 00:17:52,938 It's over. 441 00:17:52,938 --> 00:17:54,405 You understand? 442 00:17:57,643 --> 00:17:59,244 I can't do this! 443 00:17:59,244 --> 00:18:00,905 I'm sorry, Mr. Donaghy, but I can't. 444 00:18:03,148 --> 00:18:05,717 Mr. Donaghy wanted me to stop talking to you 445 00:18:05,717 --> 00:18:07,119 so you'd come back. 446 00:18:07,119 --> 00:18:09,621 So you used Cranston as his gatekeeper! 447 00:18:09,621 --> 00:18:11,824 I'm very disappointed, Kenneth. 448 00:18:11,824 --> 00:18:13,358 I know, I blew it. 449 00:18:13,358 --> 00:18:16,762 I guess I'm only farm-strong, and not heart-strong. 450 00:18:16,762 --> 00:18:17,896 Fine. Go and help him. 451 00:18:17,896 --> 00:18:19,264 I shouldn't have tried to manipulate 452 00:18:19,264 --> 00:18:20,265 the two of you that way. 453 00:18:20,265 --> 00:18:21,800 But I will need you 454 00:18:21,800 --> 00:18:23,168 to turn in your page jacket. 455 00:18:23,168 --> 00:18:25,671 What? 456 00:18:25,671 --> 00:18:27,773 Well, your main duty was taking care of Tracy. 457 00:18:27,773 --> 00:18:29,604 Tracy no longer works here. 458 00:18:30,843 --> 00:18:32,444 Therefore, your services are no longer required. 459 00:18:32,444 --> 00:18:33,502 As a page? 460 00:18:34,379 --> 00:18:36,215 Oh, no... 461 00:18:36,215 --> 00:18:37,716 Wait a minute, you want to fire my boy, Ken? 462 00:18:37,716 --> 00:18:39,384 Stay out of this, Tracy. It's not your concern. 463 00:18:39,384 --> 00:18:40,385 Unless? 464 00:18:40,385 --> 00:18:41,753 Unless what? 465 00:18:41,753 --> 00:18:44,456 You say Kenneth can't work here because I don't work here. 466 00:18:44,456 --> 00:18:45,624 But if I work here 467 00:18:45,624 --> 00:18:47,126 so can Kenneth. 468 00:18:47,126 --> 00:18:48,827 I don't understand. 469 00:18:48,827 --> 00:18:50,562 Of course you don't, you idiot. 470 00:18:50,562 --> 00:18:52,364 I'm coming back to work, Jack... 471 00:18:52,364 --> 00:18:54,199 with Kenneth. 472 00:18:54,199 --> 00:18:55,567 Damn you and your meddling. 473 00:18:55,567 --> 00:18:57,369 I'll be in my dressing room. 474 00:18:57,369 --> 00:18:58,802 That a boy, Tray. Come on. 475 00:19:00,372 --> 00:19:04,001 I've got to get back into that bubble. 476 00:19:12,417 --> 00:19:15,420 Sir, you are pulling that look off. 477 00:19:15,420 --> 00:19:16,922 Look, I wanted to apologize for my behavior 478 00:19:16,922 --> 00:19:18,190 the other day on the tennis court. 479 00:19:18,190 --> 00:19:19,925 That is not who I am. 480 00:19:19,925 --> 00:19:21,226 But you made me feel like a loser. 481 00:19:21,226 --> 00:19:22,488 'Cause you lost. 482 00:19:23,829 --> 00:19:25,264 Okay, maybe I shouldn't have done that to you. 483 00:19:25,264 --> 00:19:27,566 But... you have so much potential. 484 00:19:27,566 --> 00:19:29,368 But I'm happy this way. 485 00:19:29,368 --> 00:19:31,203 I didn't like it outside the bubble, Liz. 486 00:19:31,203 --> 00:19:33,539 It was very ironic. 487 00:19:33,539 --> 00:19:36,708 No, it wasn't. That's not how you use that word... 488 00:19:36,708 --> 00:19:38,877 No, stop it. I want to use "ironic" however I want. 489 00:19:38,877 --> 00:19:41,580 I want to stay in the bubble, Liz. 490 00:19:41,580 --> 00:19:43,549 And I want you in there with me. 491 00:19:43,549 --> 00:19:46,218 Come on. 492 00:19:46,218 --> 00:19:47,549 Come away with me. 493 00:19:48,687 --> 00:19:50,389 We can go upstate on my new motorcycle. 494 00:19:50,389 --> 00:19:53,517 Oh, boy, Drew. 495 00:19:54,760 --> 00:19:57,729 I don't think this is going to work. 496 00:19:57,729 --> 00:19:59,965 Okay. 497 00:19:59,965 --> 00:20:02,399 I guess I'll see you around then. 498 00:20:03,902 --> 00:20:07,272 Or as the French say... 499 00:20:07,272 --> 00:20:11,003 Yeah. I'll see you around. 500 00:20:12,000 --> 00:20:15,134 Best watched using Open Subtitles MKV Player 501 00:20:15,184 --> 00:20:19,734 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 36149

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