All language subtitles for 30 Rock S05e23 Respawn.eng

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,718 --> 00:00:03,418 Alright! 2 00:00:03,419 --> 00:00:06,018 Now that the popsicle is melted, we've got ourselves a tongue depressor 3 00:00:06,150 --> 00:00:07,418 I want you to look at these cold sores... 4 00:00:07,419 --> 00:00:08,818 I get them when I'm stressed-out 5 00:00:09,008 --> 00:00:11,818 Nothing to be ashamed of... I get them from prostitutes. 6 00:00:11,918 --> 00:00:13,618 It's been a hard couple of months, 7 00:00:13,718 --> 00:00:15,418 Work has been crazy, 8 00:00:15,470 --> 00:00:16,786 and I went through a bad breakup. 9 00:00:16,838 --> 00:00:17,988 And then there was this plastic bag 10 00:00:18,055 --> 00:00:19,189 that represented my death... 11 00:00:19,257 --> 00:00:20,824 sounds like you could use a little R&R... 12 00:00:20,892 --> 00:00:22,142 Rum and ritalin. 13 00:00:22,226 --> 00:00:23,777 Actually, I was hoping you'd just have an ointment 14 00:00:23,845 --> 00:00:25,395 - for my mouth. - Gross. 15 00:00:25,462 --> 00:00:26,480 'Cause I'm dealing with the stress thing. 16 00:00:26,547 --> 00:00:27,531 Over the break-up, 17 00:00:27,598 --> 00:00:28,815 I'm renting a cottage out in the Hamptons. 18 00:00:28,900 --> 00:00:31,134 There's just four things I want to do this summer... 19 00:00:31,202 --> 00:00:33,003 be outdoors, wear shapeless clothing, 20 00:00:33,070 --> 00:00:35,105 do some mindless activity like gardening, 21 00:00:35,173 --> 00:00:36,406 and learn Spanish. 22 00:00:36,457 --> 00:00:38,041 There are four things I want to do this summer. 23 00:00:38,108 --> 00:00:40,276 But they're roommates, so it's tricky. 24 00:00:40,328 --> 00:00:42,779 All right, here is a prescription 25 00:00:42,847 --> 00:00:44,280 for your cold sores, 26 00:00:44,332 --> 00:00:46,466 and here's a blank one for the weekend. 27 00:00:46,551 --> 00:00:47,751 Now, one final thing. 28 00:00:47,818 --> 00:00:49,319 Why aren't you wearing pants? 29 00:00:49,387 --> 00:00:50,987 The other doctor told me to take them off. 30 00:00:51,055 --> 00:00:52,255 Other doctor? 31 00:00:52,323 --> 00:00:54,524 That's my brother Randy. 32 00:00:54,592 --> 00:00:57,010 Tomorrow he's going to jail for the rest of his life. 33 00:00:57,094 --> 00:00:58,628 Good one, Randy! 34 00:00:58,679 --> 00:01:02,182 Hey, you want to go to taco bell for lunch? 35 00:01:02,266 --> 00:01:12,202 Sync & corrections by Alice www.addic7ed.com 36 00:01:22,503 --> 00:01:23,787 - Hey... - Stop right there. 37 00:01:23,871 --> 00:01:25,622 I know that people are feeling sorry for me 38 00:01:25,706 --> 00:01:28,041 because my wife was kidnapped by Kim Jong-Il. 39 00:01:28,108 --> 00:01:30,276 - I know... - But I do not need your pity. 40 00:01:30,344 --> 00:01:33,379 And I am tired of hearing that tone of voice. 41 00:01:33,447 --> 00:01:34,981 - Aw... - Hey... 42 00:01:35,049 --> 00:01:36,616 Hey, buddy... 43 00:01:36,684 --> 00:01:38,618 Hey, I know what you're going through. 44 00:01:38,686 --> 00:01:40,854 I once kidnapped a woman. 45 00:01:40,921 --> 00:01:42,388 I know... 46 00:01:42,439 --> 00:01:44,424 - Stop talking like that, Lemon. - I'm trying to, 47 00:01:44,492 --> 00:01:46,392 but I'm kind of locked in, sweetie. 48 00:01:46,460 --> 00:01:48,862 The voice is controlling me now. 49 00:01:48,929 --> 00:01:50,029 Help me? 50 00:01:50,097 --> 00:01:52,365 Look, obviously this has been difficult. 51 00:01:52,433 --> 00:01:54,133 I'm not sleeping. 52 00:01:54,201 --> 00:01:55,601 Last night I sat in front of the TV 53 00:01:55,653 --> 00:01:58,671 and ate an entire carton of foie gras. 54 00:01:58,739 --> 00:02:02,242 I can hardly drink my morning shower scotch. 55 00:02:02,309 --> 00:02:03,610 I miss Avery. 56 00:02:03,677 --> 00:02:05,411 It's the little things I miss most. 57 00:02:05,462 --> 00:02:06,963 On a day like this, 58 00:02:07,047 --> 00:02:09,015 we would go to Strawberry Fields in Central Park 59 00:02:09,083 --> 00:02:12,452 and kick hippies' hacky sacks into the bushes. 60 00:02:12,520 --> 00:02:16,189 Look, you need to reset and try to feel normal again. 61 00:02:16,257 --> 00:02:18,491 Normal? I don't know what normal is anymore. 62 00:02:18,559 --> 00:02:20,560 "Normal" is a woman and a woman 63 00:02:20,627 --> 00:02:22,478 getting married and having a child. 64 00:02:22,563 --> 00:02:23,630 - What? - Is me being a bummer 65 00:02:23,697 --> 00:02:24,814 helping you feel like your old self? 66 00:02:24,899 --> 00:02:26,516 - Keep going. - Bush is a war criminal! 67 00:02:26,600 --> 00:02:28,434 There's so much texting going on these days 68 00:02:28,485 --> 00:02:29,936 and no communicating. 69 00:02:30,004 --> 00:02:31,020 Carbon tax! 70 00:02:31,105 --> 00:02:32,238 Please leave! 71 00:02:32,306 --> 00:02:33,973 That's the spirit. 72 00:02:36,527 --> 00:02:37,827 Well, I'm off. 73 00:02:37,912 --> 00:02:40,029 - Have a good summer, Jenna. - Oh, I will. 74 00:02:40,114 --> 00:02:41,664 Do you remember when I performed 75 00:02:41,749 --> 00:02:42,849 during halftime at the Wool Bowl? 76 00:02:42,917 --> 00:02:44,317 It was on ESPN-34. 77 00:02:44,385 --> 00:02:46,986 ♪ You can't spell "America" ♪ 78 00:02:47,037 --> 00:02:50,323 ♪ without w-o-o-l ♪ 79 00:02:50,374 --> 00:02:52,926 ♪ it's all better in wool ♪ 80 00:02:52,993 --> 00:02:54,427 A singer, everyone! 81 00:02:54,494 --> 00:02:57,597 Woolly the wool mascot, everybody! 82 00:02:59,967 --> 00:03:01,301 The sponsors were so happy with me 83 00:03:01,368 --> 00:03:04,270 they're now naming me the new celebrity face of wool. 84 00:03:04,338 --> 00:03:05,838 How exciting! 85 00:03:05,890 --> 00:03:08,892 Every year my aunt sends me a wool sweater for Christmas. 86 00:03:08,976 --> 00:03:12,211 We get it, Aunt Alice. You're a sheep. 87 00:03:12,279 --> 00:03:14,347 Also, this is very lucrative. 88 00:03:14,398 --> 00:03:17,350 Paul and I can finally buy that timeshare in Betasten Bos, 89 00:03:17,418 --> 00:03:20,019 Amsterdam's premier private sex garden. 90 00:03:20,070 --> 00:03:21,688 They have genetically altered men there 91 00:03:21,755 --> 00:03:24,223 with minotaur heads that chase you through the brambles. 92 00:03:24,291 --> 00:03:26,376 Okay. Well, good-bye, 93 00:03:26,460 --> 00:03:30,229 my closest female friend. 94 00:03:31,432 --> 00:03:33,066 Oh, my God. 95 00:03:33,133 --> 00:03:35,718 The season's over. Why are you losers still here? 96 00:03:35,803 --> 00:03:37,086 Final melee, Liz. 97 00:03:37,171 --> 00:03:38,204 It's the last game of the season 98 00:03:38,272 --> 00:03:40,073 and no one wants to lose. 99 00:03:40,140 --> 00:03:41,975 You have no summer plans? 100 00:03:42,042 --> 00:03:44,077 Well, David Eggers and I are designing a new font. 101 00:03:44,144 --> 00:03:45,311 Ugh, shut up. 102 00:03:45,379 --> 00:03:47,847 Frank, you have a girlfriend. 103 00:03:47,898 --> 00:03:49,248 And Lynn wants me to give up video games 104 00:03:49,316 --> 00:03:50,750 'cause she thinks I need to grow up. 105 00:03:50,818 --> 00:03:52,151 How's this for growing up? 106 00:03:52,219 --> 00:03:53,252 Last night for dinner 107 00:03:53,320 --> 00:03:56,489 I put milk in my Apple Jacks. 108 00:03:56,557 --> 00:03:58,891 Ha! I distracted you, and you died. 109 00:03:58,943 --> 00:04:00,559 - Game over. - No, I shot my bazooka 110 00:04:00,611 --> 00:04:02,929 at the ground to kill myself 'cause Toofer had me cornered. 111 00:04:02,997 --> 00:04:05,064 Now I respawn and start over. 112 00:04:05,132 --> 00:04:06,532 So you're killing yourself 113 00:04:06,600 --> 00:04:08,451 rather than let someone else win? 114 00:04:08,535 --> 00:04:09,802 That's why everyone has zero kills 115 00:04:09,870 --> 00:04:11,871 and we've been playing for 18 hours. 116 00:04:11,939 --> 00:04:14,240 I'm wearing a diaper, like a baby would. 117 00:04:14,291 --> 00:04:16,759 Wow. I can't wait to get out of here. 118 00:04:16,844 --> 00:04:20,263 For three months. It's gonna be glorious. 119 00:04:22,749 --> 00:04:26,185 ♪ ♪ 120 00:04:26,253 --> 00:04:28,021 Mmm. 121 00:04:28,088 --> 00:04:29,755 Hi, neighbor. II'm ina Garten. 122 00:04:29,807 --> 00:04:31,524 You know, my husband Jeffrey is away, 123 00:04:31,592 --> 00:04:33,693 and I've got some bruschetta and white wine open. 124 00:04:33,761 --> 00:04:37,063 - Why don't you come over? - I'm alive! 125 00:04:38,432 --> 00:04:41,300 All I have left is to pay the fine that I incurred 126 00:04:41,368 --> 00:04:42,969 for committing a hate crime 127 00:04:43,037 --> 00:04:46,639 against what the city is now claiming was a Jewish tree. 128 00:04:46,707 --> 00:04:47,707 And I'm free. 129 00:04:47,775 --> 00:04:48,875 Have a great summer. 130 00:04:48,942 --> 00:04:50,209 I'm not one for good-bye speeches, 131 00:04:50,277 --> 00:04:52,545 but I do feel... 132 00:04:52,613 --> 00:04:53,813 Lutz, what are you doing? 133 00:04:53,881 --> 00:04:56,049 Don't look at me. 134 00:04:56,116 --> 00:04:57,684 Mm. 135 00:04:57,751 --> 00:05:00,837 Jenna, this is a great day 136 00:05:00,921 --> 00:05:02,155 for the wool council. 137 00:05:02,222 --> 00:05:03,489 Well, I am very proud 138 00:05:03,557 --> 00:05:05,558 to be your new spokeswoman. 139 00:05:05,626 --> 00:05:07,860 You know, in the past, I was the face of Clinique, 140 00:05:07,928 --> 00:05:10,229 a French-Canadian anal rejuvenation clinic. 141 00:05:10,297 --> 00:05:13,766 And I was the feet of filthylittlefeet.com. 142 00:05:13,834 --> 00:05:15,735 Yes, well, about that. 143 00:05:15,802 --> 00:05:18,071 Jenna... 144 00:05:18,138 --> 00:05:20,873 Wool is a wholesome fabric, 145 00:05:20,941 --> 00:05:23,910 which is why your contract includes a morality clause. 146 00:05:23,977 --> 00:05:25,278 You will be required 147 00:05:25,345 --> 00:05:26,612 to conduct your personal life in manner 148 00:05:26,680 --> 00:05:28,414 which is consistent with the values 149 00:05:28,482 --> 00:05:29,682 of this industry. 150 00:05:29,750 --> 00:05:31,517 Oh, of course. 151 00:05:31,585 --> 00:05:33,219 We're just a little worried 152 00:05:33,287 --> 00:05:35,371 about publicity like this. 153 00:05:37,157 --> 00:05:39,625 No, Eugene, that's not just some guy 154 00:05:39,693 --> 00:05:41,427 I picked up at a dog bar. 155 00:05:41,495 --> 00:05:43,880 Paul and I are in a committed relationship. 156 00:05:43,964 --> 00:05:45,198 Is he a cross dresser? 157 00:05:45,265 --> 00:05:48,034 Goodness, no! 158 00:05:48,102 --> 00:05:51,687 Paul is a gender-dysmorphic bigenitalian pansexualle. 159 00:05:51,772 --> 00:05:53,072 I see. 160 00:05:53,140 --> 00:05:55,541 Maybe we should take a few days and think about this. 161 00:05:55,609 --> 00:05:57,043 No. Whenever men say that, 162 00:05:57,111 --> 00:05:58,511 I never see them again. 163 00:05:58,579 --> 00:06:00,413 You just need to meet Paul. 164 00:06:00,481 --> 00:06:03,349 Our relationship is everything that wool is about... 165 00:06:03,417 --> 00:06:05,485 love, warmth, 166 00:06:05,552 --> 00:06:07,987 chafed skin. 167 00:06:08,038 --> 00:06:10,022 ♪ Oh, noble sheep ♪ 168 00:06:10,090 --> 00:06:11,991 ♪ we eat your babies ♪ 169 00:06:12,059 --> 00:06:14,193 ♪ we use your brain ♪ 170 00:06:14,261 --> 00:06:16,095 ♪ to fight off rabies ♪ 171 00:06:16,163 --> 00:06:20,099 ♪ but the most beautiful gift you give us ♪ 172 00:06:20,167 --> 00:06:23,936 ♪ is wool ♪ 173 00:06:27,374 --> 00:06:28,975 All right, Jenna. I'd love to meet Paul. 174 00:06:29,042 --> 00:06:30,643 Let's say dinner tomorrow night at your place. 175 00:06:30,711 --> 00:06:31,811 I'll bring my wife. 176 00:06:31,879 --> 00:06:32,845 Excellent. 177 00:06:32,913 --> 00:06:34,230 I should warn you... 178 00:06:34,314 --> 00:06:37,817 This had better be a very normal dinner. 179 00:06:37,884 --> 00:06:41,020 No hijinks, no farce, and not just for the sake 180 00:06:41,088 --> 00:06:42,755 of your relationship with the National Wool Council, 181 00:06:42,823 --> 00:06:44,423 but for the sake of my wife, 182 00:06:44,491 --> 00:06:45,958 whose parents were killed in front of her 183 00:06:46,026 --> 00:06:48,427 while an episode Three's Company was... 184 00:06:48,495 --> 00:06:50,897 You know what? I'll let her tell the story at dinner. 185 00:06:50,964 --> 00:06:53,783 Wool-come, Jenna. 186 00:06:55,569 --> 00:06:57,804 Sherry, who was at the door? 187 00:06:57,871 --> 00:06:58,971 Kenneth, what are you doing? 188 00:06:59,039 --> 00:07:00,807 Well, I know your wife was kidnapped 189 00:07:00,874 --> 00:07:02,141 by some convenience store owners, 190 00:07:02,209 --> 00:07:03,576 and I'm real sorry about that. 191 00:07:03,644 --> 00:07:04,844 I'm not looking for pity. 192 00:07:04,912 --> 00:07:07,580 Pity? Oh, sir, back in Stone Mountain, 193 00:07:07,648 --> 00:07:09,916 people lose their spouses all the time. 194 00:07:09,983 --> 00:07:12,618 Mumps, hill people attacks, 195 00:07:12,686 --> 00:07:15,655 cave collapses, both business and residential. 196 00:07:15,722 --> 00:07:16,989 Continuing my list... 197 00:07:17,057 --> 00:07:18,858 Kenneth, what do you want? 198 00:07:18,926 --> 00:07:20,359 When someone needs help, 199 00:07:20,427 --> 00:07:22,361 we don't waste time feeling sorry for 'em. 200 00:07:22,429 --> 00:07:23,763 We help them. 201 00:07:23,831 --> 00:07:27,366 And you seem like you could use a home-cooked meal. 202 00:07:31,104 --> 00:07:32,872 Oh, that smells delicious. 203 00:07:32,939 --> 00:07:35,158 It's an old Parcell family recipe. 204 00:07:35,242 --> 00:07:37,510 But I like to replace the Union soldier meat 205 00:07:37,578 --> 00:07:39,512 with boiled potatoes. 206 00:07:39,580 --> 00:07:40,963 I haven't eaten at this table 207 00:07:41,048 --> 00:07:44,050 since Avery's been gone. 208 00:07:44,117 --> 00:07:45,451 That was her chair. 209 00:07:45,519 --> 00:07:49,622 - Oh, I'm sorry. - No, please sit. 210 00:07:49,690 --> 00:07:52,191 You two have similar-shaped buttocks. 211 00:07:57,231 --> 00:07:58,965 Deer God, 212 00:07:59,032 --> 00:08:00,833 thank you for this venison. 213 00:08:00,901 --> 00:08:03,502 Onion god, thank you for these onions. 214 00:08:03,570 --> 00:08:06,806 Carrot god, thank you for the carrots. 215 00:08:07,974 --> 00:08:11,110 Spanish for older women, lesson 12. 216 00:08:11,178 --> 00:08:12,712 Emergencies. 217 00:08:12,779 --> 00:08:16,716 "Disaster approaching." Desastre inminente. 218 00:08:16,783 --> 00:08:19,018 Desastre inminente. 219 00:08:20,287 --> 00:08:22,038 Fore! 220 00:08:22,122 --> 00:08:23,706 - What? - Oh, my God! 221 00:08:23,790 --> 00:08:26,926 Liz? It's Tracy! From work! 222 00:08:26,994 --> 00:08:28,194 What are you doing here? 223 00:08:28,262 --> 00:08:29,879 I just bought everything around this house. 224 00:08:29,963 --> 00:08:32,181 It's supposed to be a nice area, 225 00:08:32,266 --> 00:08:35,334 except for the "new element" everyone keeps talking about. 226 00:08:35,385 --> 00:08:36,886 Look, I got a long night 227 00:08:36,970 --> 00:08:38,304 of shooting guns in the air ahead of me. 228 00:08:38,355 --> 00:08:40,022 Do you mind if I take a nap here? 229 00:08:40,107 --> 00:08:42,358 Of course! You're my neighbor. 230 00:08:42,442 --> 00:08:45,278 I wanted a normal summer, and chaos is my normal. 231 00:08:45,345 --> 00:08:46,946 If I start screaming in my sleep, 232 00:08:47,014 --> 00:08:48,281 do not wake me up! 233 00:08:48,348 --> 00:08:50,616 I will attack you! 234 00:08:53,587 --> 00:08:55,854 Wake me up! 235 00:08:55,906 --> 00:08:57,540 Free me from this! 236 00:09:05,559 --> 00:09:07,030 Ah, Kenneth... 237 00:09:07,031 --> 00:09:08,699 Thank you for dinner last night. 238 00:09:08,766 --> 00:09:10,033 It was nice to hear a woman's laugh 239 00:09:10,101 --> 00:09:11,118 in the house again. 240 00:09:12,603 --> 00:09:14,304 You're bad. 241 00:09:14,372 --> 00:09:16,006 I thought maybe we could do it again tonight. 242 00:09:16,074 --> 00:09:18,292 Oh, sir, I'd love to, but I can't. 243 00:09:18,376 --> 00:09:20,010 - Why not? - Well, I have to work. 244 00:09:20,078 --> 00:09:21,345 Now that the crew is gone, 245 00:09:21,412 --> 00:09:23,330 I like to give everything a good spring cleaning, 246 00:09:23,414 --> 00:09:24,648 starting in the bathroom. 247 00:09:24,716 --> 00:09:25,983 There's a lot of drawings 248 00:09:26,050 --> 00:09:27,484 of Ms. Maroney eating celery 249 00:09:27,552 --> 00:09:29,786 that men are giving to her with their hips. 250 00:09:29,854 --> 00:09:30,954 I see. 251 00:09:31,022 --> 00:09:33,056 Well, another time, perhaps. 252 00:09:33,124 --> 00:09:35,225 I'll just be alone... 253 00:09:35,293 --> 00:09:36,793 In a house full of memories. 254 00:09:36,861 --> 00:09:40,180 My house is full of white cockroaches. 255 00:09:43,101 --> 00:09:44,518 Hi, sweetie! 256 00:09:44,602 --> 00:09:46,820 I got you an early anniversary present. 257 00:09:46,905 --> 00:09:48,505 It's a new leash for when I walk you through the park 258 00:09:48,573 --> 00:09:50,073 like a dog. 259 00:09:50,141 --> 00:09:53,410 The weather's supposed to be nice and muddy tomorrow... 260 00:09:53,478 --> 00:09:55,145 - What's wrong? - Look... 261 00:09:55,213 --> 00:09:56,647 I'm the face of wool now. 262 00:09:56,714 --> 00:09:58,148 I need to maintain a certain image. 263 00:09:58,216 --> 00:10:00,517 So, what, we can't be ourselves? 264 00:10:00,585 --> 00:10:01,852 Just not in public. 265 00:10:01,920 --> 00:10:03,670 We can do whatever we want here. 266 00:10:03,755 --> 00:10:06,123 Except tonight. 267 00:10:06,191 --> 00:10:08,225 Mr. Gremby is coming over for dinner. 268 00:10:08,293 --> 00:10:10,060 Eugene Gremby from the wool council? 269 00:10:10,128 --> 00:10:11,995 - Tonight? - I just want him to meet you 270 00:10:12,046 --> 00:10:13,430 and see us together. 271 00:10:13,498 --> 00:10:16,133 Then he'll get it. He'll understand what we have. 272 00:10:16,201 --> 00:10:17,834 But the Grembys are pretty conservative. 273 00:10:17,902 --> 00:10:19,269 Maybe you should change. 274 00:10:19,337 --> 00:10:21,939 Really? This is a conservative top, Jenna. 275 00:10:22,006 --> 00:10:23,774 And I hate to be the stereotypical man, 276 00:10:23,841 --> 00:10:27,010 but this is my home and I wanna wear this blouse. 277 00:10:27,078 --> 00:10:29,079 Paul, please. You need to change. 278 00:10:29,147 --> 00:10:31,415 Okay, I'll change. 279 00:10:31,482 --> 00:10:33,417 And I'll cancel the sitter for tonight, 280 00:10:33,484 --> 00:10:37,387 tell him he won't need to come sit on us after all. 281 00:10:39,157 --> 00:10:42,092 Oh, you just made a very dangerous enemy, Kenneth. 282 00:10:42,160 --> 00:10:43,794 Thanks for the heads-up, Jonathan. 283 00:10:43,861 --> 00:10:46,079 Do you wanna come to my birthday party? 284 00:10:46,164 --> 00:10:48,131 What are you doing? That's my job. 285 00:10:48,199 --> 00:10:49,800 Uh, Jonathan volunteered to clean up 286 00:10:49,867 --> 00:10:51,868 so you could come over again tonight, right, Jonathan? 287 00:10:51,936 --> 00:10:53,971 But, sir, it's not just the bathrooms 288 00:10:54,038 --> 00:10:55,439 that need cleaning. 289 00:10:55,506 --> 00:10:57,391 That's why Jonathan's family is here. 290 00:10:59,510 --> 00:11:02,763 Uh, Liddy goes down at 7:00, so I'll see you then. 291 00:11:04,382 --> 00:11:05,732 Oh, my. 292 00:11:10,855 --> 00:11:12,089 Liz Lemon. 293 00:11:12,156 --> 00:11:13,724 Any idea when your party will be over, tray? 294 00:11:13,791 --> 00:11:14,992 The party hasn't started. 295 00:11:15,059 --> 00:11:16,610 That's just the guys setting up. 296 00:11:16,694 --> 00:11:17,794 Could I borrow a cup of sugar? 297 00:11:17,862 --> 00:11:18,946 I'm trying to get a hummingbird 298 00:11:19,030 --> 00:11:20,330 to drink out of my penis. 299 00:11:20,398 --> 00:11:21,498 I can't do this, Tracy. 300 00:11:21,565 --> 00:11:22,833 This is supposed to be my vacation. 301 00:11:22,900 --> 00:11:24,284 I wanted to spend it learning Spanish, 302 00:11:24,369 --> 00:11:25,786 not living next door to you. 303 00:11:25,870 --> 00:11:28,455 I give up. Of course I'm not allowed to be a human being. 304 00:11:28,539 --> 00:11:29,756 Oh, I'm sorry. 305 00:11:29,841 --> 00:11:31,241 You didn't wanna live next door to your friend 306 00:11:31,309 --> 00:11:32,909 after all I've done for you? 307 00:11:32,961 --> 00:11:35,679 How many times have I come over and painted your apartment? 308 00:11:35,747 --> 00:11:37,381 Three! And by the way, stop doing that. 309 00:11:37,432 --> 00:11:39,383 Or maybe you're saying we're not friends. 310 00:11:39,434 --> 00:11:40,767 That's fine. 311 00:11:40,852 --> 00:11:44,471 I don't think it'll affect my behavior next season. 312 00:11:46,724 --> 00:11:49,192 "The sad woman has been trapped by the idiot." 313 00:11:49,260 --> 00:11:51,528 La mujer triste... 314 00:11:51,596 --> 00:11:52,796 We're friends. 315 00:11:52,864 --> 00:11:53,947 Next year's gonna be fine, 316 00:11:54,032 --> 00:11:55,232 'cause we're good friends. 317 00:11:55,283 --> 00:11:58,168 We're sp... spending the summer together. 318 00:11:58,236 --> 00:12:01,271 Great! I'll come over tomorrow morning! 319 00:12:09,330 --> 00:12:10,881 Okay, well, 320 00:12:10,948 --> 00:12:12,549 since you've just been staring at me like that 321 00:12:12,617 --> 00:12:14,084 for the last 20 minutes, 322 00:12:14,152 --> 00:12:15,385 I'm gonna scoot on out of here. 323 00:12:15,453 --> 00:12:17,321 Don't go, Avery. 324 00:12:17,388 --> 00:12:18,622 Uh, I mean Kenneth. 325 00:12:18,690 --> 00:12:19,856 Sir. 326 00:12:19,924 --> 00:12:21,558 You called me "Avery." 327 00:12:21,625 --> 00:12:23,560 That's your kidnapped wife's name. 328 00:12:23,627 --> 00:12:25,195 What a coincidence! 329 00:12:25,263 --> 00:12:26,863 I haven't slept in days. 330 00:12:26,931 --> 00:12:28,565 I'm not really feeling like myself. 331 00:12:28,633 --> 00:12:29,700 You know, in the evening, 332 00:12:29,767 --> 00:12:32,069 Avery and I would sit together and talk. 333 00:12:32,136 --> 00:12:33,537 It was a nice way to unwind. 334 00:12:33,604 --> 00:12:34,738 Well, I bet you miss... 335 00:12:34,805 --> 00:12:37,507 Put on these earrings. 336 00:12:44,082 --> 00:12:46,717 So...Tell me about your day. 337 00:12:46,784 --> 00:12:50,053 Well, I got a soft yes from Jonathan 338 00:12:50,121 --> 00:12:52,055 about my birthday party. 339 00:12:52,123 --> 00:12:54,858 Then I went to a very uncomfortable dinner. 340 00:12:54,926 --> 00:12:57,761 Do you know what I did today? 341 00:12:57,829 --> 00:12:59,629 Tried to be strong, sat alone with my thoughts, 342 00:12:59,697 --> 00:13:01,698 then... 343 00:13:01,766 --> 00:13:03,767 I went to a wonderful dinner. 344 00:13:03,835 --> 00:13:07,270 Then the dinner ended? 345 00:13:07,338 --> 00:13:08,939 No. 346 00:13:11,943 --> 00:13:14,544 So, Paul, what do you do? 347 00:13:14,612 --> 00:13:17,064 I am in the restaurant business, 348 00:13:17,148 --> 00:13:21,218 and I really love... 349 00:13:21,285 --> 00:13:23,387 Golf-playing. 350 00:13:23,454 --> 00:13:26,123 Is that so? What's your handicap? 351 00:13:26,190 --> 00:13:27,624 Oh, well, I don't have one myself, 352 00:13:27,692 --> 00:13:30,560 but I do like a girl with a limp. 353 00:13:39,504 --> 00:13:40,570 Oh, Paul. 354 00:13:40,638 --> 00:13:41,755 So, Mrs. Gremby, 355 00:13:41,839 --> 00:13:44,207 you're also named "Eugene"? 356 00:13:44,275 --> 00:13:46,042 Oh, no, dear. It's "u" period "Jean." 357 00:13:46,110 --> 00:13:47,711 My first name is U. Jean 358 00:13:47,779 --> 00:13:50,414 with a "u." 359 00:13:54,268 --> 00:13:56,553 Oh, that's a nice blouse. 360 00:13:56,621 --> 00:13:58,238 It definitely goes with your eyes, 361 00:13:58,322 --> 00:13:59,489 don't you think, Jenna? 362 00:13:59,557 --> 00:14:01,224 Golf, blouses. 363 00:14:01,292 --> 00:14:03,160 I'm just so impressed with how normal 364 00:14:03,227 --> 00:14:04,661 this dinner has been. 365 00:14:04,729 --> 00:14:06,329 Very wool! 366 00:14:07,498 --> 00:14:08,782 Greetings, slaves! 367 00:14:08,866 --> 00:14:11,334 Who's ready to get sat on? 368 00:14:11,402 --> 00:14:13,737 Uh, sir, I don't know who you are, 369 00:14:13,805 --> 00:14:14,838 but you are not wanted here. 370 00:14:14,906 --> 00:14:16,106 Didn't you get my text? 371 00:14:16,174 --> 00:14:17,507 I thought it was part of the game. 372 00:14:17,575 --> 00:14:18,842 We are good people 373 00:14:18,910 --> 00:14:20,177 who have no interest in being sat on! 374 00:14:20,244 --> 00:14:22,646 So don't spew your statistics 375 00:14:22,713 --> 00:14:24,431 on the health benefits of weekly sittings 376 00:14:24,515 --> 00:14:26,650 or its wide acceptance in eastern cultures. 377 00:14:26,717 --> 00:14:28,268 - Paul. - We're normal! 378 00:14:28,352 --> 00:14:29,820 And being normal is American, 379 00:14:29,887 --> 00:14:33,824 and it's respectable, and it makes us... 380 00:14:33,891 --> 00:14:35,258 Happy. 381 00:14:35,309 --> 00:14:37,461 Now get out of here. 382 00:14:38,729 --> 00:14:40,197 Well done, sir. Bravo. 383 00:14:40,264 --> 00:14:42,699 You handled that pervert with aplomb. 384 00:14:42,767 --> 00:14:44,701 Very wool. 385 00:14:46,070 --> 00:14:49,105 To tomorrow's photo shoot and wool. 386 00:14:56,147 --> 00:14:58,415 Shh! Shh, shh, shh. 387 00:15:03,947 --> 00:15:06,115 Unbelievable... you're still here. 388 00:15:06,361 --> 00:15:07,962 It's still zero, zero, zero. 389 00:15:08,030 --> 00:15:08,996 To zero. 390 00:15:09,064 --> 00:15:10,665 I did it. 391 00:15:10,733 --> 00:15:11,866 I spoke. 392 00:15:11,934 --> 00:15:13,201 This didn't get mailed. 393 00:15:13,268 --> 00:15:14,435 What are you doing here? 394 00:15:14,503 --> 00:15:15,737 Shouldn't you be out in the Hamptons 395 00:15:15,804 --> 00:15:17,805 not getting invited to stuff? 396 00:15:17,873 --> 00:15:19,073 I came back for the day. 397 00:15:19,141 --> 00:15:21,125 Tracy lives next door to me. 398 00:15:21,210 --> 00:15:22,827 I can't leave, I can't stay. 399 00:15:22,911 --> 00:15:24,445 I'm trapped. 400 00:15:24,496 --> 00:15:25,880 Speaking of trapped, I got you, Lutz! 401 00:15:25,947 --> 00:15:27,215 Nope, grenade. 402 00:15:27,282 --> 00:15:28,349 Blowing myself up. 403 00:15:28,417 --> 00:15:30,418 Oh, my God. 404 00:15:30,486 --> 00:15:32,487 That's what I have to do. 405 00:15:32,554 --> 00:15:34,989 I can be a normal person. 406 00:15:35,057 --> 00:15:38,309 I have to blow myself up. 407 00:15:40,145 --> 00:15:41,880 No, your honor, I'm not disputing the fine. 408 00:15:41,947 --> 00:15:43,882 I'm refusing to pay it. 409 00:15:43,949 --> 00:15:45,950 Grenade, respawn. 410 00:15:46,018 --> 00:15:47,785 Miss... I mean, ma'am, read the fine print. 411 00:15:47,853 --> 00:15:49,621 If you don't pay, I can sentence you to 412 00:15:49,688 --> 00:15:51,456 up to three weeks of community service. 413 00:15:51,524 --> 00:15:53,074 How about three months? 414 00:15:53,142 --> 00:15:55,093 This is a sham, your dis-honor. 415 00:15:55,160 --> 00:15:56,928 Nay, a mockery! 416 00:15:56,996 --> 00:15:59,113 I've put the system on trial. 417 00:15:59,198 --> 00:16:00,765 You can't handle the truth. 418 00:16:00,833 --> 00:16:02,967 I'm out of order? You're out of order. 419 00:16:03,035 --> 00:16:04,752 Victor Sifuentes! Hoo-ah! 420 00:16:04,837 --> 00:16:06,454 Gavel, gavel, gavel! 421 00:16:06,539 --> 00:16:07,839 I lost my gavel over the weekend, 422 00:16:07,907 --> 00:16:09,607 but it doesn't mean you can talk to me like that. 423 00:16:09,675 --> 00:16:11,593 Talk to who? I just see an empty robe. 424 00:16:11,677 --> 00:16:14,812 Do you honestly not see me, or are you being rude? 425 00:16:14,880 --> 00:16:17,265 - I am being rude. - That's it. 426 00:16:17,349 --> 00:16:19,117 Twelve weeks of community service. 427 00:16:19,184 --> 00:16:21,519 You'll spend your whole summer picking up trash. 428 00:16:21,587 --> 00:16:23,988 Gavel, gavel, gavel! 429 00:16:24,056 --> 00:16:25,590 Freedom! 430 00:16:25,641 --> 00:16:27,859 For me. Probably not you guys. 431 00:16:27,927 --> 00:16:31,129 Mr. Donaghy, where are my clothes? 432 00:16:31,196 --> 00:16:32,697 Sherry must've put them in the wash 433 00:16:32,765 --> 00:16:33,932 while you were showering. 434 00:16:33,999 --> 00:16:36,150 Now, give us a twirl. 435 00:16:36,235 --> 00:16:39,037 This is not right, sir. 436 00:16:39,104 --> 00:16:40,772 Now, what do you say you put on some of Avery's perfume 437 00:16:40,839 --> 00:16:42,140 and we head over to Strawberry Fields 438 00:16:42,207 --> 00:16:43,975 and whip pennies at the drum circle? 439 00:16:44,043 --> 00:16:47,445 I don't like to swear, sir, but, no, thank you. 440 00:16:47,513 --> 00:16:49,847 Now, maybe I haven't had a wife who was kidnapped, 441 00:16:49,915 --> 00:16:51,950 but I have seen the Brady Bunch 442 00:16:52,017 --> 00:16:53,885 where Tiger runs away. 443 00:16:53,953 --> 00:16:57,622 We've all been through some bad stuff, Mr. Donaghy. 444 00:16:58,673 --> 00:17:01,309 I had the perfect woman. 445 00:17:01,393 --> 00:17:02,810 Gorgeous. 446 00:17:02,895 --> 00:17:04,662 Brilliant. 447 00:17:04,730 --> 00:17:07,298 Always let me be the hat in Monopoly. 448 00:17:07,349 --> 00:17:09,400 Why is this happening to me? 449 00:17:09,468 --> 00:17:11,703 God, are you punishing me 450 00:17:11,770 --> 00:17:13,838 because my hair is better than yours? 451 00:17:13,906 --> 00:17:15,707 All right, sir, enough. 452 00:17:15,774 --> 00:17:18,026 You wanted me to be Mrs. Donaghy? 453 00:17:18,110 --> 00:17:20,978 Well, I know Mrs. Donaghy, and she is mean. 454 00:17:21,030 --> 00:17:23,481 She once made Rahm Emanuel cry in an airport lounge. 455 00:17:23,549 --> 00:17:25,883 So fine. I will be Mrs. Donaghy. 456 00:17:25,951 --> 00:17:27,719 And I'm gonna say... 457 00:17:27,786 --> 00:17:29,554 Listen to me, Jack. 458 00:17:29,622 --> 00:17:30,855 You don't want people to pity you? 459 00:17:30,923 --> 00:17:33,891 Well, they should, because you're pitiful. 460 00:17:33,959 --> 00:17:36,394 You think you're all alone. "Boo-hoo, why can't my life 461 00:17:36,462 --> 00:17:37,695 be the way it was?" 462 00:17:37,763 --> 00:17:39,864 Well, it can't. 463 00:17:39,932 --> 00:17:41,866 And you're not alone. You have a daughter 464 00:17:41,934 --> 00:17:43,701 you should be spending time with 465 00:17:43,769 --> 00:17:45,236 instead of being weird to Kenneth. 466 00:17:45,304 --> 00:17:49,007 He may be a chinless piece of human garbage, 467 00:17:49,074 --> 00:17:52,010 but he will never fill the void 468 00:17:52,077 --> 00:17:53,611 that I left behind. 469 00:17:53,679 --> 00:17:55,346 Oh, look, here he comes now. 470 00:17:55,397 --> 00:17:57,115 He's gonna ask me to go to his birthday party. 471 00:17:57,182 --> 00:17:58,316 "Hi, 'Mrs. Don'gy.' 472 00:17:58,367 --> 00:18:00,318 you wan' come on down my birfday party?" 473 00:18:00,369 --> 00:18:03,354 No, I can't, but I know Jack can. 474 00:18:03,405 --> 00:18:06,024 Kenneth, Kenneth, I get it. 475 00:18:08,827 --> 00:18:11,929 Uh, Sherry? Put Liddy's baby pantsuit on. 476 00:18:11,997 --> 00:18:14,098 I'm taking her to work with me today. 477 00:18:14,166 --> 00:18:15,400 All right, Mr. Donaghy. 478 00:18:15,467 --> 00:18:18,069 And, uh, thank you. 479 00:18:18,137 --> 00:18:20,371 Avery. 480 00:18:24,476 --> 00:18:26,728 Here's to you, Jenna Maroney. 481 00:18:26,812 --> 00:18:27,912 Even with your back to me, 482 00:18:27,980 --> 00:18:30,881 I can definitely tell it's you. 483 00:18:30,933 --> 00:18:32,233 I'll turn around later. 484 00:18:32,317 --> 00:18:34,485 Perfect. I'll keep talking. 485 00:18:34,553 --> 00:18:38,322 Mm, wool. 486 00:18:38,390 --> 00:18:41,659 You know, my wife U. Jean is out of town 487 00:18:41,727 --> 00:18:43,428 visiting her parents' graves. 488 00:18:43,495 --> 00:18:45,079 Maybe we could meet later for a drink 489 00:18:45,164 --> 00:18:46,731 and you could show me your front. 490 00:18:46,799 --> 00:18:48,199 We could do that... 491 00:18:48,250 --> 00:18:49,417 Now! 492 00:18:49,501 --> 00:18:50,835 Paul? 493 00:18:50,903 --> 00:18:52,253 And Jenna. 494 00:18:52,337 --> 00:18:53,838 Oh, my God! 495 00:18:53,906 --> 00:18:55,173 I'm finally taking a stand... 496 00:18:55,240 --> 00:18:57,575 After all these days. 497 00:18:57,643 --> 00:18:59,143 You wanted us to be normal. 498 00:18:59,211 --> 00:19:01,295 Well, this is our normal, 499 00:19:01,380 --> 00:19:05,049 and this is what we think of your morality clause. 500 00:19:08,654 --> 00:19:10,421 Mm, give mommy some beard. 501 00:19:10,489 --> 00:19:11,773 Ugh! 502 00:19:11,857 --> 00:19:13,441 Oh, you got some crumbs in here. 503 00:19:13,525 --> 00:19:14,625 Oh, eat it. 504 00:19:19,198 --> 00:19:22,116 Good God! Lemon? 505 00:19:22,201 --> 00:19:25,002 Liddy, say "good God, Lemon." 506 00:19:25,070 --> 00:19:26,537 Goo gah, Lem. 507 00:19:26,605 --> 00:19:29,440 I did it, Jack. I got my dream vacation! 508 00:19:29,491 --> 00:19:30,708 You're on a chain gang. 509 00:19:30,776 --> 00:19:32,543 I'm outdoors, I'm wearing comfortable clothes, 510 00:19:32,611 --> 00:19:35,129 I'm gardening, and I'm learning Spanish! 511 00:19:44,306 --> 00:19:46,424 Uh, Liddy and I just went to strawberry fields, 512 00:19:46,492 --> 00:19:49,660 where she spat up on a white lady's dreads. 513 00:19:50,929 --> 00:19:52,029 It's nice to see that we're back 514 00:19:52,097 --> 00:19:53,898 to our version of normal. 515 00:19:56,902 --> 00:19:58,903 - Jenna? - Oh, Jenna, no. 516 00:19:58,970 --> 00:20:00,738 There you are! Bad dog! 517 00:20:00,806 --> 00:20:02,473 You'll go in the crate tonight. 518 00:20:02,541 --> 00:20:05,009 - Grr. - Ew. 519 00:20:05,077 --> 00:20:06,194 Hey, Jack. Hey, Liz. 520 00:20:06,278 --> 00:20:08,379 Ow! 521 00:20:08,447 --> 00:20:09,664 Fore! 522 00:20:09,748 --> 00:20:11,148 Hey, guys! 523 00:20:11,200 --> 00:20:14,001 It's me! Tracy! The black guy from work. 524 00:20:14,086 --> 00:20:15,369 What are you doing? 525 00:20:15,454 --> 00:20:16,454 I hooked a ball onto a truck 526 00:20:16,505 --> 00:20:17,755 on the Long Island Expressway. 527 00:20:17,823 --> 00:20:20,858 And Tracy Jordan does not take Mulligans. 528 00:20:20,926 --> 00:20:23,060 Good thing you had to move out of that house. 529 00:20:23,128 --> 00:20:25,930 Some idiot rammed his boat that I was driving into it. 530 00:20:31,136 --> 00:20:33,304 You see all the good that is in them, 531 00:20:33,355 --> 00:20:35,172 how much capacity for love? 532 00:20:35,224 --> 00:20:37,909 Yes, I know. 533 00:20:37,976 --> 00:20:39,677 I just need more time with them. 534 00:20:39,745 --> 00:20:42,179 Give me more time, Jacob, 535 00:20:42,231 --> 00:20:43,731 I beg of you! 536 00:20:50,009 --> 00:20:51,527 Go, I see you... I'm killing myself. 537 00:20:51,878 --> 00:20:52,879 Respawn. 538 00:20:55,080 --> 00:20:56,114 Respawn. 539 00:20:56,966 --> 00:20:58,168 Oh... Dammit! 540 00:21:02,236 --> 00:21:05,636 Hola, everyone! Are you ready for Season 6? 541 00:21:09,039 --> 00:21:10,039 Oh, my God. 542 00:21:10,342 --> 00:21:11,108 Wait... 543 00:21:11,110 --> 00:21:12,977 How long have we've been here? 544 00:21:12,978 --> 00:21:22,977 Sync & corrections by Alice www.addic7ed.com 38248

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