All language subtitles for Keeping.Up.Appearances.1x01.Daddys.Accident.DVDRip.DivX-Tishbite75

WE'RE GOING TO HAVE
TO TELL OUR HYACINTH.

OH, GOD.
NOT TONIGHT.

TOMORROW MORNING. I COULDN'T
FACE HYACINTH. NOT TONIGHT.

NOW, LADIES.

YOU'RE NEW.
- ONLY AROUND HERE, LADY.

HAVE YOU NOTHING FOR THIS ADDRESS?
- SORRY.

I'D BE GREATLY OBLIGED
IF YOU'D MAKE QUITE SURE.

THERE'S USUALLY SOMETHING
FOR A MRS. RICHARD BOUQUET.

HOW DO YOU SPELL
"BOUQUET"? - B-U-C-K-E-T.

WHAT?

B-U-C-K-E-T.

OH, BUCKET.

IT'S "BOUQUET."

I'M SORRY LADY. THERE'S
NOTHING HERE FOR "BOUQUET."

NOTHING?
FOR THIS ADDRESS?

YET YOU HAVE SOMETHING
FOR NEXT DOOR?

I FIND THAT VERY STRANGE.

I CAN'T HELP THAT,
LADY.

BUT PEOPLE WILL
TELL YOU,

IT'S COMMON KNOWLEDGE I RECEIVE
MORE MAIL THAN THESE NEXT DOOR.

THERE MUST BE A CARD FROM
MY SISTER IN TENERIFE.

SHE'S BACK HOME, BUT WE'RE
STILL WAITING FOR THE CARD.

ANYTHING WRONG,
HYACINTH?

HE'S MISLAID MY LETTERS
AT THE SORTING OFFICE.

THIS WOULD NEVER HAVE HAPPENED
WITH MY FORMER POSTMAN.

YOU WILL REMEMBER,
ELIZABETH,

THAT YOU'RE INVITED THIS EVENING
TO MY CANDLELIGHT SUPPER?

IT'S ENGRAVED ON
MY MIND, HYACINTH.

TELEPHONE, DEAR. YOU'RE
WANTED ON THE PHONE.

I THINK IT'S URGENT.

I'M NOT OFFERING AN OPINION.
THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID, URGENT.

PLEASE DON'T SHOUT IN THAT
EXCITABLE MANNER OUTDOORS, RICHARD.

I DON'T LIKE YOU GETTING
EXCITED OUTDOORS.

MORNING, MAJOR.

BY GOD, WOMAN.

YOU COULD DRIVE A MAN MAD
LOOKING SO ATTRACTIVE

SO EARLY IN THE DAY.

OH, MAJOR.

YOU'LL NOT FORGET MY LITTLE
CANDLELIGHT SUPPER THIS EVENING?

19:30 HOURS.

I'LL BE THERE,
YOU MINX.

YOU CAN ALWAYS TELL
BREEDING.

THE PHONE, HYACINTH.
IT THINK IT'S URGENT.

IT'S ABOUT YOUR FATHER.

WE'RE GOING TO HAVE
TO EMULSION THIS CEILING.

WE'VE JUST DONE IT.

IT'S NOT A FIT CEILING
TO BRING A MAJOR UNDER.

IT'S YOUR SISTER, DAISY.

SHE'S NOT COMING,
IS SHE?

NOT IN THAT AWFUL COAT.

AND HE'S NOT BRINGING HER. NOT
IN THAT RUST BUCKET OF A CAR.

I WILL NOT HAVE THEM-
- I THINK IT'S URGENT.

IT'S SO THOUGHTLESS TO
LOOK AS POOR AS THEY DO.

DAISY, HOW ARE YOU, DEAR?

DADDY ILL?
HOW ILL?

IS IT OF A SEVERITY NECESSARY
TO CANCEL MY CANDLELIGHT SUPPER?

WHAT WAS HE DOING
AT HIS AGE ON A BICYCLE?

OH MY GOD.

HOW MUCH TO DRINK?

YES, HYACINTH.

WHAT DID SHE SAY?

SHE SAYS NOT TO GO OVER TO
HER PLACE. SHE'S COMING HERE.

THAT'S ALL WE NEED,
A ROYAL VISIT.

I WAS HOPING SHE'D GO
STRAIGHT TO THE HOSPITAL.

THEY WON'T LET ANYBODY IN
UNTIL VISITING TIME.

DON'T YOU REMEMBER
WHEN I WAS IN

HAVING THAT BREAKDOWN
ON ACCOUNT OF MR. CRABTREE?

WHAT EVER HAPPENED
TO MR. CRABTREE?

I SWORE I'D
NEVER SEE HIM AGAIN.

AND FOR A WHILE I CUT IT BACK
RUTHLESSLY TO EVERY OTHER TUESDAY.

DOES BORIS KNOW ABOUT YOU
STILL SEEING MR. CRABTREE?

OF COURSE HE DOESN'T.
DO YOU THINK I'M STUPID?

I DON'T KNOW HOW YOU
KEEP THE PACE UP, ROSE.

IT'S NOT EASY.

IF YOU RELAX FOR A MINUTE
THEY'RE GOING BACK TO THEIR WIVES.

I ENVY YOU, DAISY.

ME?

IT MUST BE WONDERFUL BEING
MARRIED TO A BUM LIKE YOUR ONSLOW.

SO YOU CAN LET
YOURSELF GO COMPLETELY.

I WOULDN'T SAY COMPLETELY.

NEAR ENOUGH,
COMPLETELY.

GET A SHIRT ON, ONSLOW.
HYACINTH'S COMING.

HOW NICE.

SHE'S GOING TO WANT TO
KNOW EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED.

YOU'LL HAVE TO TELL HER.

I DON'T SEE WHY
I SHOULD HAVE TO TELL HER.

YOU'LL HAVE
TO TELL HER BECAUSE...

I'LL BE TOO BUSY
TIDYING UP.

I HATE TIDYING UP.

I'M UNDER THE DOCTOR
FOR BEING DIZZY.

I'M SURE IT'S TIDYING UP.

IF YOU ONLY GOT DIZZY
WHEN YOU TIDIED UP

YOU SHOULD HAVE THE
CLEAREST HEAD IN THE AREA.

YOU'RE GOING TO PARK
IN THE TURNING AREA?

THERE'S NO ROOM IN FRONT OF
THE HOUSE, IT BLOCKS THE ROAD.

HOWEVER, I'M GAME IF YOU ARE,
IF YOU WANT TO BLOCK THE ROAD.

IT'S JUST THAT I WISH
YOU WOULD CONSULT ME.

I DON'T LIKE YOU MAKING
DECISIONS UNILATERALLY.

WOULD YOU LIKE ME
TO LOCK THE CAR?

I THINK SO.
DON'T YOU?

WE'RE PRACTICALLY
IN BEIRUT.

ONSLOW.

DICKY.
HYACINTH.

WHY DO YOU LET HIM
CALL YOU "DICKY"?

HOW CAN I HELP IT
IF HE CALLS ME "DICKY"?

QUEEN MOTHER'S OUTSIDE.

GIVE US A HAND, ROSE.

I'M EXPECTING A CALL.

I GAVE BORIS THIS NUMBER.
THE SWINE PROMISED HE'D RING.

LEAVE-
LEAVE IT.

RICHARD!
- NOW WHAT?

YOU SHOULDN'T BE STRETCHING
YOUR LEGS LIKE THAT AT YOUR AGE.

IT'S NOT FITTING
IN BROAD DAYLIGHT,

IN FRONT
OF PRYING EYES.

Daisy:
HERE WE ARE THEN.

THANKS, DAISY.

DRINK UP.

TELL ME WHAT'S HAPPENED.

DAD'S NOT BEEN-
WELL LATELY.

WHY WASN'T I INFORMED?

IT'S NOT BEEN
THE KIND OF "NOT WELL"

YOU'D WANT TO BE
INFORMED ABOUT.

WHAT KIND HAS IT BEEN?

IT'S A BIT EMBARRASSING.

EMBARRASSING?
DADDY?

HE'S A DIRTY OLD MAN.
- SHUT UP, ONSLOW.

RICHARD, GO AND KEEP
AN EYE ON THE CAR.

I THINK I'LL GO AND
KEEP AN EYE ON THE CAR.

WHAT DOES ONSLOW MEAN?

HE MEANS...

DAD'S TAKEN TO GOING OUT
AT NIGHT ON HIS OWN LATELY.

IN THE NAUGHTY.

BUT-
BUT, BUT-

WHY WOULD FATHER BE
IN THE NUDE?

HE'S IN LOVE
WITH THE MILKWOMAN.

DON'T BE SO RIDICULOUS.

YOU'D HAVE THOUGHT SO IF YOU'D
SEEN HIM PEDDLING AFTER HER

STARK NAKED ON HIS BIKE.

HE CHASED HER FOR A MILE,
DOWN BY THE CANAL.

BUT THE MILKWOMAN DOESN'T GO
ANYWHERE NEAR THE CANAL, DOES SHE?

SHE DID LAST NIGHT.

HE CAUGHT HER
ON HER WAY TO BINGO.

WELL...

YOU KNOW HOW FOND HE IS
OF DAIRY PRODUCTS.

I EXPECT HE WANTED
TO ORDER EXTRA CREAM.

WHY WOULD YOUR FATHER
HAVE BEEN NAKED?

I DON'T BELIEVE IT.

AND KEEP YOUR VOICE DOWN.

IT'S BAD ENOUGH
WITH HIS CLOTHES ON.

DADDY WOULD NEVER
BE NAKED.

WHY WOULD DADDY BE NAKED
WHEN HE'S GOT HIS NAME DOWN

FOR A NICE
OLD PERSON'S BUNGALOW?

THIS WAY, MRS. BUCKET.

IT'S "BOUQUET."

HOW ARE YOU FEELING
MR. OXLEY?

BETTER THAN HIM.

DADDY.

I'M AFRAID HE WON'T BE AWARE
OF VERY MUCH, MRS. BUCKET-

"BOUQUET."

HE'S QUITE COMFORTABLE
BUT HEAVILY SEDATED.

OH, DADDY.

SHOULD HE BE IN A WARD WITH A
PERSON WHO WEARS HIS HAT IN BED?

I'LL LEAVE YOU
WITH YOUR FATHER.

DOCTOR...

WHAT CONDITION WAS MY FATHER
IN WHEN HE WAS ADMITTED?

DRUNK AS A SKUNK.

I EXPECT HE WAS FLUSHED
FROM EXCESSIVE CYCLING.

CAN YOU DESCRIBE WHAT
HE WAS WEARING, DOCTOR?

VERY QUICKLY.

VERY LITTLE, REALLY.

TO BE HONEST...
NOTHING AT ALL.

THERE MUST BE
SOME MISTAKE.

THAT'S WHAT I THOUGHT. IT
WAS QUITE A CHILLY EVENING.

HE'D BEEN IN THE CANAL.

HE WAS THAT PLASTERED,
HE WOBBLED OFF INTO THE CANAL.

THAT EXPLAINS IT.

MY FATHER WAS CYCLING
ALONG THE CANAL

WHEN HE SAW
SOMEONE IN DISTRESS,

SO HE REMOVED
HIS OUTER GARMENTS

AND DIVED IN TO SAVE THEM.
OH, BRAVE DADDY.

VERY COMMENDABLE.

HE MUST'VE REMOVED MORE THAN
HIS OUTER GARMENTS, MRS. BUCKET.

"BOUQUET."

WHEN HE WAS PULLED OUT
HE WAS ABSOLUTELY NAKED.

POLLUTION.

WHAT HE'D BEEN WEARING WAS
OBVIOUSLY DISSOLVED BY THE POLLUTION.

IF YOU'LL EXCUSE ME, I MUST
ATTEND TO MY OTHER PATIENTS.

WHY IS HE SEDATED
AFTER SUCH A PLUCKY ACT?

HE WAS HIGHLY EXCITED, AND THEN
OF COURSE THERE WAS THE INJURY.

FROM THE MILK BOTTLE?
POOR LAMB.

WHERE IS THE INJURY?
YOU MAY TELL ME THE WORST.

UH, MRS.-
- I DEMAND TO BE SHOWN

THE EXTENT
OF HIS INJURIES.

VERY WELL.

WHERE IS THE INJURY?

NEVER YOU MIND.

HOW ARE THINGS?

I'M TOO DISTRESSED
AT THE MOMENT, ELIZABETH.

MY FATHER IS RECOVERING
FROM INJURIES SUSTAINED

IN THE COURSE
OF A VERY PLUCKY ACTION...

WHICH HE MODESTLY
FORBIDS ME TO DISCUSS.

OH, WELL, IS THERE
ANYTHING I-

JUST GIVE ME TIME
TO RECOVER MY COMPOSURE,

AND THEN COME AND TAKE TEA
WITH ME AT 3:25.

3:25?
NOT 27?

OH, IT'S YOU, ELIZABETH!

A TINY BIT EARLY, PERHAPS,
BUT DO COME IN.

I THOUGHT IT WAS 3:25.

NOT QUITE, DEAR.
- MY WATCH SAYS 3:25.

OH, THAT WATCH, YES.
I EXPECT IT WOULD.

SHALL WE GO THROUGH
TO THE KITCHEN?

I DON'T KNOW WHY YOU WON'T
LET ME THROUGH YOUR BACK DOOR.

I THINK IT'S SO COMMON,
DON'T YOU, USING BACK DOORS?

NO, THE PROPER WAY FOR
MY GUESTS, I ALWAYS FEEL,

IS THROUGH
THE FRONT DOOR.

AND THEN STRAIGHT
INTO THE KITCHEN?

WELL, YES.

UNLESS, OF COURSE,
IT'S SOMEONE SPECIAL.

NOW I KNOW YOU'RE SAYING
TO YOURSELF,

"HOW IS SHE
BEING SO BRAVE?"

WELL, YES, I AM BRAVE.

MY FATHER WOULD WISH IT.

I ADMIT I MISS MY SHERIDAN
AT TIMES LIKE THESE.

HE'S SUCH A COMFORT TO HIS MOTHER
AS WELL AS BEING TERRIBLY GIFTED.

DO SIT DOWN, ELIZABETH.
MAKE YOURSELF AT HOME.

OH, NOT THERE, DEAR.
I LIKE TO FACE THE WINDOW.

LEMON?

W-

MY WORD,

DOESN'T SOMEONE LOOK SMARTER
THAN SHE DID EARLIER?

SOMETHING NEW, DEAR?

NO, NO,
I'VE HAD IT AGES.

OH, YES.
I CAN SEE YOU HAVE NOW.

I THOUGHT WE'D HAVE
THE NICER CHINA.

OH, THANK YOU,
HYACINTH.

THEY'RE SOMETHING
OF A FAMILY HEIRLOOM.

OH, GOD, DON'T GIVE ME
ANYTHING SPECIAL.

YOU WILL BE CAREFUL,
WON'T YOU, DEAR?

BISCUIT?

THANK YOU, HYACINTH.

I USED TO HAVE SIX OF THESE
UNTIL ONE FELL INTO THE HANDS

OF MY BROTHER-IN-LAW ONSLOW
ONE CHRISTMAS.

I COULD'VE KILLED HIM.

OF COURSE, ONE CAN'T MAKE
A FUSS ON FESTIVE OCCASIONS,

BUT HE CERTAINLY GOT THE SHORT
END OF THE TURKEY, I CAN TELL YOU.

DID THEY TELL YOU WHAT
WAS WRONG WITH YOUR FATHER?

SOMETHING MILDLY
EMBARRASSING.

ONE OF THOSE MINOR
GERIATRIC COMPLAINTS.

I COULDN'T CATCH
THE MEDICAL TERMINOLOGY.

OH.

AAAH!

NO, YOU CANNOT HAVE
A NUMBER 24,

NOR A DOUBLE PORTION
OF 37.

THIS ISN'T
THE CHINESE TAKE-AWAY.

THIS IS A PRIVATE
SLIMLINE WHITE TELEPHONE

WITH NO CONNECTION
WHATSOEVER

TO ANY BUSINESS OR TRADE-

ESPECIALLY NOT ONE
OF FOREIGN EXTRACTION.

OH, HYACINTH,
I'M SO SORRY.

NOW DO STOP
WORRYING, DEAR.

WE'RE NOT GOING TO FALL OUT
OVER A CUP AND SAUCER,

EVEN A VERY OLD,
IRREPLACABLE CUP AND SAUCER.

OH, IT WOULD
HAPPEN TO ME.

BELIEVE ME,
I DO UNDERSTAND.

IT CAN'T BE EASY TO BE DAINTY
WHEN YOU'RE ALL THUMBS.

THERE, I THINK
THAT WILL DO

UNTIL I CAN AFFORD
A LITTLE MORE TIME.

OH, DEAR.
- WE'RE NOT GOING TO WORRY ANYMORE

ABOUT A BIT
OF EXPENSIVE CARPET

AND A CUP THAT'S
BEEN AROUND FOR AGES.

WHICH REMINDS ME, DID
YOU SOIL YOUR DRESS, DEAR?

OH, NO!
NO, NO.

NO, SURPRISING IT DIDN'T.
I'M FINE.

THAT'S AMAZING.

WOULD YOU LIKE ANOTHER CUP OF EARL GREY?
- NO! THANK YOU.

IN A BEAKER, PERHAPS?
- NO, NOTHING. THANK YOU, NO.

WELL, IT'S ALL OVER NOW.

ALL OVER EVERYWHERE.

DO SIT DOWN AGAIN,
ELIZABETH.

HAVE YOU HEARD
FROM GAIL RECENTLY?

YES, SHE RANG
AT THE WEEKEND.

THAT'S NICE. I THINK A
DAUGHTER ALWAYS SHOULD.

GAIL'S VERY GOOD
THAT WAY.

SO'S MY SHERIDAN.

I TREMBLE TO THINK
SOMETIMES

WHAT HE SPENDS ON PHONE
CALLS TO HIS MOTHER.

NOT THAT HE CAN'T
AFFORD IT, OF COURSE.

THEY GAVE HIM A VERY GOOD
GRANT AT THE POLY, YOU KNOW,

TO STOP HIM BEING TEMPTED
BY OXFORD OR CAMBRIDGE.

GAIL'S STUDYING HARD.

WELL, IT'S A STRUGGLE,
ISN'T IT,

WHEN THEY'RE NOT
ACADEMICALLY GIFTED?

OUR GAIL IS
ACADEMICALLY GIFTED.

IS SHE?

OH, WONDER WHO I CAN BE
CONFUSING HER WITH?

PERHAPS IT'S THAT BOY
SHE'S LIVING SO OPENLY

AND UNASHAMEDLY
UNMARRIED WITH.

I HARDLY THINK SO.

HAROLD IS A VERY NICE BOY
WITH A FIRST-CLASS BRAIN.

IS HE?
- YES, HE IS, HYACINTH, I CAN ASSURE YOU.

YOU'D NEVER KNOW
TO LOOK AT HIM, WOULD YOU?

I HOPE THAT'S NOT DADDY
GOING SEPTIC.

THE "BOUQUET" RESIDENCE, THE
LADY OF THE HOUSE SPEAKING.

OH, IT'S YOU, VIOLET.

IT'S MY SISTER, VIOLET.

THE ONE WHO MARRIED
THE TURF-ACCOUNTANT.

HE BUILT THAT BIG HOUSE WITH
ROOM FOR A SAUNA AND A PONY.

YOU'VE HEARD ME SPEAK
ABOUT VIOLET.

FREQUENTLY.

SLOW DOWN, VIOLET, DEAR.
YOU SOUND VERY EXCITED.

I KNOW IT'S BEEN
A SHOCK ABOUT DADDY.

WHAT ARE YOU
EXCITED ABOUT?

VIOLET, THAT'S NOT A WORD
I EVER EXPECTED

TO HEAR YOU USE
ON A TELEPHONE.

BRUCE?

WHAT ABOUT BRUCE?

I DON-

OH, D-

WELL, I'VE NEVER LIKED HIM
WHOLEHEARTEDLY

ON ACCOUNT OF THOSE
ICE CUBES HE SERVES

IN THE SHAPE
OF NAKED LADIES.

WHY SHOULDN'T HE
BUY A WHIP?

I EXPECT HE GOT IT
FROM A JOCKEY.

WHAT DOES HE USE IT FOR?

VIOLET,

WOULD YOU RING BACK, DEAR?

NO, NO.
ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT.

I'LL STAY ON THE PHONE.

HOLD ON.

THERE'S A PERSON
AT THE FRONT DOOR.

ELIZABETH, WOULD YOU SEE
TO THAT FOR ME, DEAR?

KINDLY INFORM WHOEVER IT IS
THAT I AM AT HOME

AND THAT I WILL
RECEIVE THEM MOMENTARILY.

NO, DEAR, IT'S ELIZABETH
FROM NEXT DOOR.

THAT'S RIGHT,
THE ONE WHO'S ALL THUMBS.

YOU MET HER ONCE AT ONE
OF MY CANDLELIGHT SUPPERS.

WHAT DO YOU MEAN
YOU COULDN'T SEE ANYBODY?

OH, YES,
SHE'S FINE.

SHE'S JUST BROKEN
ONE OF GRANDMOTHER'S CUPS.

IT'S A SECURITY LATCH.
THERE'S A LITTLE BUTTON.

RICHARD HAD IT INSTALLED...

TO PROTECT ME
FROM ANYONE DESPERATE.

THEY WOULD HAVE TO BE.

AH, ELECTRIC.

HAVE YOU BEEN NEXT DOOR?
- YES, THERE'S NOBODY IN.

I KNOW, I'M HERE.

I'VE LEFT YOU A CARD.
- OH.

IT'S THE ELECTRIC MAN
TO READ YOUR METER.

IS IT THE ONE
WITH THE FUNNY MUSTACHE?

TELL HER YES.

HE SAYS YES.

MAKE HIM WAIT THERE
TILL I'VE LOOKED AT HIS FEET.

VIOLET,
I HAVE TO GO, DEAR.

I'VE GOT THE ELECTRIC.

OH MY GOODNESS.

I'M SO SORRY.

I'VE BEEN THINKING
ABOUT MY SISTER.

SHE SEEMS TO HAVE HAD
A RATHER ACTIVE HOLIDAY.

OH, THE SHOES.

YOU REMEMBERED OUR
PROCEDURE FROM LAST TIME.

VERY WELL.

LEAVE THEM OUTSIDE
AND DO COME IN.

THANK YOU, DEAR.

YOU'RE A GREAT IMPROVEMENT
ON THE ONE I HAD BEFORE.

HE USED TO BRUSH
AGAINST MY WALLS.

OF COURSE I RANG
HIS SUPERIORS.

I SAID I WILL NOT HAVE ELECTRIC
MEN BRUSHING AGAINST MY WALLS.

ELIZABETH, CLOSE THE
DOOR, DEAR. THE HEAT'S ON.

AH!
- OH!

FINGERS.

8321.

CORRECT.

IS YOUR ELECTRIC AS CLEAN
AS IT WAS, DO YOU THINK?

MY HOPS? ARE SOMETIMES
VERY DIFFICULT TO CLEAN.

CLEANEST FUEL
THERE IS.

IT GOES TO SOME
VERY FUNNY FAMILIES.

WOULD YOU HAVE MINE CHECKED TO
MAKE QUITE SURE I GET IT FIRST?

LEAVE IT WITH ME, LADY.

BECAUSE I WON'T HAVE IT IF IT'S ALREADY
BEEN TO SOME OF THOSE OTHER PLACES.

RIGHT-O, MADAM.

MUCH OBLIGED.

IT'S ONLY ME.

SHOULDN'T THAT BE,
"IT'S ONLY I," DEAR?

ESPECIALLY WHEN YOU'RE SHOUTING
IT WHERE THE NEIGHBORS CAN HEAR.

I'M NOT SURE.

NEITHER AM I,
SO YOU MUST BE CAREFUL.

HOW'S YOUR FATHER?

I RANG, THE WARD SISTER ANSWERED.

SHE SAYS HE'S SITTING UP AND
BEGINNING TO TAKE AN INTEREST...

THAT'S GOOD.
- ... IN THE PHYSIOTHERAPIST.

HE THINKS HE'S IN LOVE
WITH THE PHYSIOTHERAPIST.

IT'S PROBABLY
JUST THE DRUGS.

AND THAT SWINE BRUCE WANTS MY SISTER
TO WEAR SOME AWFUL LEATHER OUTFIT.

OH, IS HE GOING
TO TAKE HER MOTORCYCLING?

NO, IT'S NOT MOTORCYCLING.

IT'S SOMETHING
HE PICKED UP IN SPAIN.

WHAT, BULLFIGHTING?

NO, I DON'T THINK
IT'S THAT EITHER.

ANYWAY, DEAR,
ENOUGH OF MY PROBLEMS.

DID YOU MANAGE TO GET THE PARSLEY?
- YES, IN THE KITCHEN.

YOU'LL NEVER GUESS WHO I BUMPED INTO.
- GOOD.

WOULD YOU POLISH
THOSE GLASSES FOR ME, DEAR,

AND THEN GIVE ME A HAND
WITH BUFFING UP THE CRUET?

SHERIDAN.

HOW SENSITIVE OF YOU
TO CALL, DEAR.

WHAT A CLOSE PSYCHIC LINK
WE HAVE, YOU AND I.

WHAT DOES HE WANT?

WANTSANYTHING.

HE'S JUST RINGING
HIS MOTHER.

YOU NEED HOW MUCH,
SHERIDAN?

FOR WHAT?

YOU'VE JOINED
AN ORGANIZATION.

THAT'S NICE, DEAR,
MAKING FRIENDS.

WHAT KIND
OF AN ORGANIZATION?

IS IT LIKE A CLUB,
A GOLF CLUB?

NOT A GOLF CLUB. I SEE.
JUST A GROUP OF FRIENDS.

YOU CALL YOURSELVES
WHAT, DEAR?

"THE SWORD OF THE PEOPLE"?
DO BE CAREFUL, SHERIDAN.

MAKE SURE THEY'RE NOT
TOO SHARP.

ALWAYS WEAR A MASK.

YOU DO WEAR MASKS?
OH, THAT'S VERY SENSIBLE.

YOU'LL PAY
DADDY BACK WHEN?

WHEN YOU'VE ROBBED
YOUR FIRST BANK? SHERIDAN!

LOOK, DEAR,

COULDN'T YOU FIND SOME NICE
PHILATELIC SOCIETY TO JOIN?

NO, WE WILL NOT
SEND A CHECK.

RICHARD, THAT'S SHERIDAN
ON THE PHONE-

OHH.

NOW LISTEN, SHERIDAN,
YOU'VE UPSET YOUR FATHER.

OH, MAJOR, I'M SO SORRY.

I WAS EXPECTING
ANOTHER CALL.

YES.

OH, YES, MY CANDLELIGHT
SUPPER IS STILL ON.

OH, IT'S BEEN A FUNNY DAY,
BUT WE HAVE TO PRESS ON.

WOULD I LIKE SOME FLOWERS
FROM YOUR CONSERVATORY?

HOW VERY KIND.

YES, I'LL POP ALONG NOW.

THAT'S VERY CIVILIZED
OF YOU, MAJOR. BYE.

WHAT ABOUT SHERIDAN?

DON'T SEND HIM
ANY MONEY.

OH, ISN'T THIS DELIGHTFUL?

THIS IS SO KIND OF YOU.

I'VE CUT SOME
PRIME BLOOMS FOR YOU.

OH, LOVELY.

OH, YOU GREW THEM
ALL YOURSELF.

ESPECIALLY FOR YOU.

OH...

I MUST RUSH.
I'VE LEFT THE OVEN ON.

Hyacinth: I DIDN'T KNOW
YOU WERE SO ATHLETIC.

AAAH. OOH.
- OOH!

WHAT'S WRONG NOW?

NOTHING IS WRONG.

AS FAR AS ANYONE IS CONCERNED,
NOTHING IS WRONG.

WE'RE GOING TO HAVE
A CANDLELIGHT SUPPER.

IT'S GOING TO BE
THE USUAL SUCCESS.

I SEE NO REASON

FOR TRAILING OUR PROBLEMS
IN FRONT OF OUR FRIENDS.

IS THE MAJOR COMING?

YES, RICHARD,

I DO BELIEVE THE MAJOR
WILL BE COMING.

AND IT'S A GOOD JOB
HE IS A MAJOR.

IF HE WAS A SERGEANT HE WOULDN'T
GET A FOOT PAST THE DOOR.