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1
00:00:06,222 --> 00:00:08,224
- Who are you?
- We are ghosts.
2
00:00:08,269 --> 00:00:10,265
While most spirits pass
on to the afterlife,
3
00:00:10,266 --> 00:00:12,272
we are cursed to spend eternity...
4
00:00:12,316 --> 00:00:14,101
Oh, and she's gone.
5
00:00:14,144 --> 00:00:15,753
Now what's gonna happen to the house?
6
00:00:15,798 --> 00:00:16,841
This is huge.
7
00:00:16,885 --> 00:00:18,582
And it's all ours!
8
00:00:18,626 --> 00:00:19,670
This must be them,
9
00:00:19,714 --> 00:00:21,064
the new folks that own the house.
10
00:00:21,108 --> 00:00:22,457
W... watch out!
11
00:00:24,501 --> 00:00:26,112
- Oh.
- Oh!
12
00:00:27,201 --> 00:00:28,984
Oh, my God. Sam. Sam!
13
00:00:29,028 --> 00:00:31,248
Seems as if your accident
left you so close to death
14
00:00:31,292 --> 00:00:33,293
that you somehow gained the ability
15
00:00:33,337 --> 00:00:34,947
to actually see dead people.
16
00:00:34,990 --> 00:00:36,426
They're here. They're all behind you.
17
00:00:36,470 --> 00:00:37,470
Hello!
18
00:00:37,472 --> 00:00:39,561
I don't see anybody.
19
00:00:39,603 --> 00:00:41,084
There's a bunch of zombies down here!
20
00:00:41,128 --> 00:00:43,433
Zombies? Zombies aren't real.
21
00:00:43,478 --> 00:00:45,479
- We're ghosts.
- Okay, fine.
22
00:00:45,523 --> 00:00:46,784
I see all of you.
23
00:00:46,829 --> 00:00:48,482
I admit your existence. Happy?
24
00:00:48,526 --> 00:00:49,527
What?
25
00:00:50,572 --> 00:00:52,139
You're not even listening to me.
26
00:00:52,182 --> 00:00:53,661
Babe, you're not listening tome.
27
00:00:54,880 --> 00:00:57,057
The Livings, they are fighting.
28
00:00:57,100 --> 00:00:58,362
Ooh, nothing better than watching
29
00:00:58,405 --> 00:00:59,755
a good husband-wife argument.
30
00:00:59,798 --> 00:01:00,798
What's the beef?
31
00:01:00,798 --> 00:01:02,104
He wants to fix the roof,
32
00:01:02,149 --> 00:01:04,325
- and she wants to fix the fountain.
- Ah.
33
00:01:04,367 --> 00:01:06,370
Home renovation... a
classic of the genre.
34
00:01:06,414 --> 00:01:07,415
Shall we go...
35
00:01:07,457 --> 00:01:08,632
spectate?
36
00:01:08,676 --> 00:01:10,504
I mean, we're literally
watching paint dry.
37
00:01:10,548 --> 00:01:13,682
These new glosses are
fantastic. But, yeah,
38
00:01:13,724 --> 00:01:14,769
fight's probably more interesting.
39
00:01:18,599 --> 00:01:21,081
So, imagine... you're a
guest driving up to our B&B
40
00:01:21,123 --> 00:01:23,692
and the first thing you see is
this giant gleaming fountain.
41
00:01:23,734 --> 00:01:27,174
Look, babe, nobody loves a fancy
fountain more than I do, but...
42
00:01:27,216 --> 00:01:28,566
He's gonna pivot back to the roof.
43
00:01:28,609 --> 00:01:31,265
I think we need to focus
on the bigger picture.
44
00:01:32,179 --> 00:01:33,222
Which is the roof.
45
00:01:33,266 --> 00:01:34,528
- Ha-ha! Ding, ding!
- Oh! You nailed that!
46
00:01:34,572 --> 00:01:35,920
Please be quiet!
47
00:01:35,965 --> 00:01:38,706
Excuse me, am I not
allowed to have an opinion?
48
00:01:38,750 --> 00:01:40,229
I was talking to the ghosts.
49
00:01:40,274 --> 00:01:41,796
Right. Because ghosts are a real thing
50
00:01:41,840 --> 00:01:43,189
and my wife talks to them now.
51
00:01:43,233 --> 00:01:44,887
Wait, are they in here?
52
00:01:44,930 --> 00:01:45,930
Yes, they are.
53
00:01:45,930 --> 00:01:47,367
And they are very annoying.
54
00:01:47,411 --> 00:01:48,543
- Well, that's uncalled for.
- She's not wrong.
55
00:01:48,543 --> 00:01:50,109
- That's a little harsh.
- Look,
56
00:01:50,152 --> 00:01:51,849
I didn't want to bring this up, but...
57
00:01:51,894 --> 00:01:54,156
I did give in on moving here for you.
58
00:01:54,200 --> 00:01:55,766
Somebody's playing card of guilt.
59
00:01:55,771 --> 00:01:56,771
Mm.I gave up my job.
60
00:01:56,771 --> 00:01:58,643
I gave up my friends.
61
00:01:58,686 --> 00:02:01,168
I know, and I appreciate you.
62
00:02:01,210 --> 00:02:04,344
But... we're gonna have to
fix the fountain eventually.
63
00:02:04,388 --> 00:02:05,694
And, just so you know,
64
00:02:05,736 --> 00:02:06,956
the ghosts agree with me.
65
00:02:06,998 --> 00:02:08,957
She making things up!
66
00:02:09,001 --> 00:02:10,568
- Ruthless.
- So hot.
67
00:02:10,611 --> 00:02:12,830
So, shall I talk to the contractor?
68
00:02:12,875 --> 00:02:14,789
Sure. Why not?
69
00:02:14,832 --> 00:02:16,792
- Ooh! Mwah! Mwah! Ooh.
- Well. Bravo.
70
00:02:16,835 --> 00:02:19,141
Bravo. Well done.
71
00:02:20,187 --> 00:02:22,362
All right.
72
00:02:22,406 --> 00:02:23,711
Love you!
73
00:02:23,754 --> 00:02:26,149
So, back to the paint?
74
00:02:26,193 --> 00:02:29,195
- Ooh! I wonder if it dried lighter.
- Hmm.
75
00:02:29,239 --> 00:02:32,155
Let's go see.
76
00:02:37,204 --> 00:02:38,987
Sam! Quick favor.
77
00:02:39,031 --> 00:02:42,383
Could you look up all the Mets
scores for me for the last 37 years?
78
00:02:42,425 --> 00:02:44,688
And I'd like to know how all my
stocks performed after I died.
79
00:02:44,733 --> 00:02:47,213
My big three were Circuit
City, Enron and Blockbuster.
80
00:02:47,257 --> 00:02:50,347
This Spotify thing, am I on there?
81
00:02:50,390 --> 00:02:52,567
Ooh, I'd love to hear
some of my old recordings,
82
00:02:52,610 --> 00:02:54,569
instead of that racket
Jay's been listening to.
83
00:02:54,611 --> 00:02:56,091
Guys, could you just give me a minute?
84
00:02:56,135 --> 00:02:58,795
- I really have to finish this article.
- Sam, would love to smell some pizza.
85
00:02:58,795 --> 00:03:00,182
Any chance of you
throwing one in the oven?
86
00:03:00,227 --> 00:03:02,010
- I actually already ate.
- Yeah, a salad.
87
00:03:02,054 --> 00:03:03,104
What am I supposed to do with that?
88
00:03:03,157 --> 00:03:05,402
- So, again, the Mets?
- Uh-uh, Pete, you got to take a number.
89
00:03:05,445 --> 00:03:06,645
- You're in line behind us.
- Guys...
90
00:03:06,645 --> 00:03:08,884
Just tell me how many RBIs
Keith Hernandez had in '87.
91
00:03:08,927 --> 00:03:10,189
- Give me something.
- Just go to the...
92
00:03:10,234 --> 00:03:11,365
At the very least, just,
like, a piece of toast.
93
00:03:11,365 --> 00:03:12,497
♪ Do not ignore a woman. ♪
94
00:03:12,539 --> 00:03:13,539
- It takes two seconds...
- Guys!
95
00:03:14,542 --> 00:03:15,717
Guys, I get that it's cool
96
00:03:15,760 --> 00:03:17,240
that you have access to a Living now,
97
00:03:17,283 --> 00:03:19,546
but you cannot just bombard
me with questions all day.
98
00:03:19,591 --> 00:03:21,070
So, why don't you choose
99
00:03:21,114 --> 00:03:23,550
a representative and that
person... and that person only...
100
00:03:23,594 --> 00:03:25,204
can come to me with requests?
101
00:03:25,248 --> 00:03:26,771
Well, how are we supposed
to pick who does that?
102
00:03:26,814 --> 00:03:28,687
I don't know. Have an election!
103
00:03:28,729 --> 00:03:30,341
You okay, ma'am?
104
00:03:30,384 --> 00:03:33,126
Y... yeah. Just...
just on... on Bluetooth.
105
00:03:33,170 --> 00:03:35,085
And, in summary,
106
00:03:35,127 --> 00:03:37,216
do the election.
107
00:03:38,740 --> 00:03:39,960
I don't even know what
she pretending to be doing.
108
00:03:39,961 --> 00:03:42,048
There's something with the
fountain I need to show you and Jay.
109
00:03:42,091 --> 00:03:43,180
Oh, uh, okay. Yeah.
110
00:03:43,223 --> 00:03:44,658
That's not gonna be good news.
111
00:03:44,703 --> 00:03:46,878
- Yeah, probably should've done the roof.
- Shut up, Pete!
112
00:03:48,054 --> 00:03:49,360
My name is Mark.
113
00:03:49,402 --> 00:03:51,100
Yeah. Course it is.
114
00:03:52,362 --> 00:03:54,973
Bye, Pete.
115
00:03:56,409 --> 00:03:58,368
We were trying to figure
out how this thing's fed.
116
00:03:58,412 --> 00:03:59,978
We came across some cast iron piping.
117
00:04:00,021 --> 00:04:02,502
- That'll have to be swapped out.
- That sounds cheap.
118
00:04:02,546 --> 00:04:04,418
But that's not what
I needed to show you.
119
00:04:04,461 --> 00:04:06,027
While we were digging,
120
00:04:06,072 --> 00:04:07,204
we found this.
121
00:04:07,247 --> 00:04:09,162
Oh, my God!
122
00:04:09,205 --> 00:04:10,336
Is that... ?
123
00:04:10,381 --> 00:04:11,512
That's right.
124
00:04:11,556 --> 00:04:12,860
Human remains.
125
00:04:14,862 --> 00:04:15,862
Oh, my God.
126
00:04:15,864 --> 00:04:17,127
- What?
- Who is that?
127
00:04:17,170 --> 00:04:18,954
- Whoa.
- Oh.
128
00:04:18,997 --> 00:04:21,000
Hey. That's me!
129
00:04:24,917 --> 00:04:28,180
- Are you sure that's you, Thor?
- Yeah, I died right here.
130
00:04:28,225 --> 00:04:30,574
I watched my flesh rot and my
bones swallowed by the earth
131
00:04:30,617 --> 00:04:32,750
over hundreds of years.
132
00:04:32,793 --> 00:04:35,492
- Was pretty cool.
- Thing is, I got to report it to the county.
133
00:04:35,536 --> 00:04:36,841
- No!
- They'll investigate,
134
00:04:36,884 --> 00:04:37,973
and if they declare it a crime scene,
135
00:04:38,016 --> 00:04:39,497
the whole site gets shut down.
136
00:04:39,540 --> 00:04:40,932
Project could get delayed for months.
137
00:04:40,975 --> 00:04:42,064
Months?
138
00:04:42,108 --> 00:04:43,108
Months?
139
00:04:44,153 --> 00:04:45,980
What if the bones were really old?
140
00:04:46,024 --> 00:04:48,069
Like, uh... like Viking bones?
141
00:04:48,113 --> 00:04:51,161
Just to randomly name some
type of really old... bones.
142
00:04:51,204 --> 00:04:53,500
Pretty sure there weren't
any Vikings around here.
143
00:04:53,502 --> 00:04:56,093
- He lies!
- Well, actually...
144
00:04:56,093 --> 00:04:57,093
Here we go.
145
00:04:57,095 --> 00:04:59,516
- We sailed down the coast from lands north...
- Vikings sailed down the coast
146
00:04:59,560 --> 00:05:00,778
- from lands north...
- sent sorties...
147
00:05:00,822 --> 00:05:02,302
Uh, from Canada.
148
00:05:02,346 --> 00:05:04,651
Sent sorties inland to search for furs.
149
00:05:04,696 --> 00:05:06,959
- Beavers, otters, moose.
- Beavers, otters, moose.
150
00:05:07,101 --> 00:05:08,475
And when you find moose,
151
00:05:08,475 --> 00:05:09,875
- much plenty you shall have.
- And when you find moose,
152
00:05:09,918 --> 00:05:12,269
much plenty you shall have.
153
00:05:12,411 --> 00:05:13,586
Okay.
154
00:05:13,630 --> 00:05:15,415
She really loves the show Vikings.
155
00:05:15,459 --> 00:05:17,112
Well, if it is Viking, they'll reach out
156
00:05:17,156 --> 00:05:18,591
to the state archeology department,
157
00:05:18,636 --> 00:05:20,332
they call in the nerds
with the toothbrushes...
158
00:05:20,377 --> 00:05:21,899
the whole thing takes longer.
159
00:05:21,942 --> 00:05:24,380
Sorry, guys. But first thing
tomorrow, I got to call this in.
160
00:05:24,423 --> 00:05:27,906
This is so bad. We cannot
afford a months-long delay.
161
00:05:27,949 --> 00:05:29,124
We have loans to repay.
162
00:05:29,168 --> 00:05:30,343
I'll give you a piece of advice
163
00:05:30,387 --> 00:05:31,822
my bootlegger boyfriend used to live by:
164
00:05:31,865 --> 00:05:34,781
get rid of the damn body.
165
00:05:34,826 --> 00:05:37,437
What if the bones just disappeared?
166
00:05:37,480 --> 00:05:39,308
- What are you talking about?
- Well,
167
00:05:39,351 --> 00:05:41,398
what if he came back tomorrow
and the bones were just gone?
168
00:05:41,441 --> 00:05:43,137
And then there's no
reason to call the county.
169
00:05:43,182 --> 00:05:44,574
No bones, no problem.
170
00:05:44,617 --> 00:05:46,620
Who are you?
171
00:05:49,362 --> 00:05:51,798
While I'm having a moment of lucidity,
172
00:05:51,843 --> 00:05:53,627
- can we just go over this one more time?
- Sure.
173
00:05:53,670 --> 00:05:55,976
Sam wants us to select
a ghost representative
174
00:05:56,021 --> 00:05:57,630
to funnel all of our requests through.
175
00:05:57,675 --> 00:05:58,675
Right on.
176
00:05:58,675 --> 00:06:00,199
So, now, who is Sam? Am I Sam?
177
00:06:00,242 --> 00:06:03,680
- And the moment's passed.
- So now we can't even approach Samantha?
178
00:06:03,723 --> 00:06:05,422
That's no way to treat a human being.
179
00:06:05,464 --> 00:06:06,596
Who are we, my butler?
180
00:06:06,639 --> 00:06:08,120
Okay. So I guess we just vote?
181
00:06:08,163 --> 00:06:09,817
- Fine. Let's do it.
- Yeah. Great.
182
00:06:12,516 --> 00:06:15,475
Oh, if only it were that simple.
183
00:06:15,519 --> 00:06:17,869
No, my friends, democracy,
184
00:06:17,911 --> 00:06:20,175
though the best form of government,
185
00:06:20,218 --> 00:06:22,089
is a tedious and flawed process.
186
00:06:22,134 --> 00:06:24,658
There will be hours of debate.
187
00:06:24,701 --> 00:06:27,007
Long, boring speeches
we'll have to sit through.
188
00:06:27,052 --> 00:06:29,750
Or we could dispense with all of that,
189
00:06:29,793 --> 00:06:31,752
- pick me and be done with it.
- Mm.
190
00:06:31,795 --> 00:06:34,058
Great. Mazel tov. You win. Done.
191
00:06:34,101 --> 00:06:36,757
Wonderful. You've chosen
wisely, my friends.
192
00:06:36,800 --> 00:06:40,281
Now it is tradition for the
victor to give some remarks.
193
00:06:40,326 --> 00:06:42,459
Don't worry. I'll keep
it to a brisk hour.
194
00:06:42,502 --> 00:06:44,286
I knew from an early age...
195
00:06:44,329 --> 00:06:45,591
Aw, screw it.
196
00:06:45,636 --> 00:06:47,288
I'm running against this windbag.
197
00:06:47,332 --> 00:06:48,725
- What?
- Ooh...
198
00:06:48,769 --> 00:06:50,031
Not 'cause I want the gig.
199
00:06:50,074 --> 00:06:51,380
I just don't want him to have it.
200
00:06:51,423 --> 00:06:53,904
What? This is ridiculous.
201
00:06:53,947 --> 00:06:55,384
You were a singer.
202
00:06:55,427 --> 00:06:57,822
I was at the signing of the
Declaration of Independence.
203
00:06:57,865 --> 00:07:00,127
- No, you weren't.
- I was outside.
204
00:07:00,172 --> 00:07:02,043
They started early.
205
00:07:02,086 --> 00:07:04,872
Point is, I practically
invented democracy.
206
00:07:04,915 --> 00:07:06,526
Actually, indigenous
governments were the model
207
00:07:06,569 --> 00:07:08,398
for American federalism, so...
208
00:07:08,440 --> 00:07:11,704
But... the electoral
college and the powdered wig!
209
00:07:11,704 --> 00:07:13,706
Oh, my! Come on!
210
00:07:13,750 --> 00:07:15,970
Oh, pop some popcorn, 'cause
this is about to get good.
211
00:07:16,014 --> 00:07:17,449
We also invented popcorn.
212
00:07:17,494 --> 00:07:18,494
You're welcome.
213
00:07:20,452 --> 00:07:22,237
Oh, this can't be legal.
214
00:07:22,281 --> 00:07:24,196
This is a crime. We're
committing a crime.
215
00:07:24,238 --> 00:07:27,504
It's victimless. The victim is
literally here saying it's okay.
216
00:07:27,547 --> 00:07:29,288
Yeah. It's cool.
217
00:07:29,331 --> 00:07:31,245
- So, how did you end up here?
- Well, I fell in love with a white girl
218
00:07:31,290 --> 00:07:33,987
with a cute, cute butt and then
she inherited a haunted house
219
00:07:34,031 --> 00:07:35,641
- and then...
- Babe, I'm talking to Thorfinn.
220
00:07:35,685 --> 00:07:38,079
Well, it was a long time ago.
221
00:07:38,122 --> 00:07:41,822
Seven winters after
the Battle of Svolder.
222
00:07:41,865 --> 00:07:44,737
I was tracking beasts across the land
223
00:07:44,781 --> 00:07:46,740
when a great storm gathered.
224
00:07:46,783 --> 00:07:49,656
But before I could find shelter...
225
00:07:54,139 --> 00:07:57,576
In retrospect, a metal helmet
was probably not great idea.
226
00:07:57,620 --> 00:08:00,232
Oh, my God. He was struck by lightning.
227
00:08:00,274 --> 00:08:02,625
What are we gonna do
with these? I mean, him.
228
00:08:02,668 --> 00:08:05,105
I mean, you. Sorry to point
at you with your own bone.
229
00:08:06,629 --> 00:08:08,370
Viking funeral!
230
00:08:08,413 --> 00:08:10,024
- What?
- What'd he say?
231
00:08:10,067 --> 00:08:11,591
Every Viking boy, from very little,
232
00:08:11,634 --> 00:08:13,593
dreams of dying horrifically
233
00:08:13,637 --> 00:08:16,466
and having a most
triumphant Viking funeral.
234
00:08:16,509 --> 00:08:18,468
It is a very special day.
235
00:08:19,685 --> 00:08:22,601
But Thor... never have one.
236
00:08:22,646 --> 00:08:24,125
He wants a Viking funeral.
237
00:08:24,168 --> 00:08:26,562
What, like we shoot a flaming arrow
238
00:08:26,605 --> 00:08:27,954
and burn the bones in a boat?
239
00:08:27,999 --> 00:08:30,827
Yes! Yes! Small man knows.
240
00:08:30,827 --> 00:08:33,961
- Yep.
- That does sound kind of cool.
241
00:08:34,004 --> 00:08:35,962
And it would be a great way
to get rid of the evidence.
242
00:08:36,006 --> 00:08:37,182
I beg of you.
243
00:08:37,225 --> 00:08:39,489
I will forever be in your debt.
244
00:08:39,532 --> 00:08:41,620
It seems really important to him.
245
00:08:41,664 --> 00:08:44,668
Okay, big guy, then I
just have one ask.Jay.
246
00:08:44,711 --> 00:08:46,495
Can I shoot the flaming arrow?
247
00:08:46,538 --> 00:08:47,538
I married a nine-year-old.
248
00:08:47,539 --> 00:08:48,628
I like small man.
249
00:08:48,672 --> 00:08:50,673
He is fun.
250
00:08:51,674 --> 00:08:53,546
Yeah, it was crazy. We came downstairs
251
00:08:53,590 --> 00:08:55,243
and we were like, "Whoa!" and the...
252
00:08:55,287 --> 00:08:56,635
and the bones, they were just...
253
00:08:56,679 --> 00:08:58,595
gone.
254
00:08:58,638 --> 00:09:01,597
- Hmm. Ah.
- So you don't have to call the county anymore, huh?
255
00:09:01,640 --> 00:09:04,251
Which is good. All right.
256
00:09:04,296 --> 00:09:05,557
So they're just gone?
257
00:09:05,601 --> 00:09:10,171
Yeah. Must've been an animal? Wild dog?
258
00:09:10,215 --> 00:09:11,956
- Y'all got wild dogs out here?
- Hey, man, I don't really care.
259
00:09:11,999 --> 00:09:13,610
I didn't want this
site shut down either.
260
00:09:13,653 --> 00:09:15,698
That being said, I was
talking to a buddy of mine.
261
00:09:15,741 --> 00:09:18,222
He said that if the bones
were actually Viking,
262
00:09:18,265 --> 00:09:19,876
could be worth a pretty penny.
263
00:09:21,052 --> 00:09:22,052
- Really?
- Yeah.
264
00:09:22,096 --> 00:09:23,706
A museum would definitely buy them.
265
00:09:23,750 --> 00:09:25,186
But you don't have them, right?
266
00:09:25,230 --> 00:09:26,360
Nah.
267
00:09:26,404 --> 00:09:27,580
Huh.
268
00:09:27,624 --> 00:09:29,190
Sucks about those wild dogs.
269
00:09:35,674 --> 00:09:37,328
Sam?!
270
00:09:37,371 --> 00:09:39,809
So, can I count on your support, Hetty?
271
00:09:39,852 --> 00:09:42,508
Well, I do believe
272
00:09:42,552 --> 00:09:44,596
that women should have
each other's backs.
273
00:09:44,640 --> 00:09:46,163
- Yes.
- No.
274
00:09:46,206 --> 00:09:48,340
But I don't believe that women
should be allowed to vote.
275
00:09:48,383 --> 00:09:50,081
- Hmm.
- I won't get into the whos and whys,
276
00:09:50,124 --> 00:09:52,649
but it has something to do with
overtaxing the female brain.
277
00:09:52,692 --> 00:09:54,346
What the hell?
278
00:09:54,389 --> 00:09:55,565
Come on, Hetty!
279
00:09:55,607 --> 00:09:57,087
I fully endorse your position,
280
00:09:57,130 --> 00:09:58,784
which is why you should vote for me!
281
00:09:58,828 --> 00:10:01,482
Illegitimate though that vote may be!
282
00:10:04,660 --> 00:10:06,488
Okay, so that should be everything.
283
00:10:06,532 --> 00:10:09,056
I found an old canoe out in
the boathouse by the pond,
284
00:10:09,100 --> 00:10:11,405
and Jay has been
practicing with his arrow.
285
00:10:11,450 --> 00:10:15,075
And mead. Oh, need mead.
Watch you and small man drink.
286
00:10:15,076 --> 00:10:17,412
- Yes.
- We don't have any mead.
287
00:10:17,456 --> 00:10:20,501
No mead? So what do you
drink at your orgies?
288
00:10:20,546 --> 00:10:23,244
Bro, Viking life sounds awesome.
289
00:10:23,288 --> 00:10:25,419
You know, I was wondering...
290
00:10:25,463 --> 00:10:27,422
if funerals are so
important in your culture,
291
00:10:27,466 --> 00:10:28,946
how come you never had one?
292
00:10:28,989 --> 00:10:31,077
Told you. Was...
293
00:10:31,121 --> 00:10:32,905
- alone on a mission.
- Yeah, I know.
294
00:10:32,950 --> 00:10:35,605
But-but when you
didn't, you know, return,
295
00:10:35,648 --> 00:10:37,649
could they not find you or...
296
00:10:37,693 --> 00:10:39,129
Don't interrogate Thor!
297
00:10:39,173 --> 00:10:41,174
Less talk, more brew mead!
298
00:10:42,220 --> 00:10:43,655
What was that all about?
299
00:10:43,700 --> 00:10:45,222
Well, it's a complicated time.
300
00:10:45,265 --> 00:10:46,354
There's obviously a lot of emotion
301
00:10:46,398 --> 00:10:47,834
wrapped up with this whole funeral.
302
00:10:47,878 --> 00:10:50,357
Plus, it's been a thousand
years since his last orgy.
303
00:10:51,403 --> 00:10:52,926
Big guy's a little pent-up.
304
00:10:55,232 --> 00:10:56,538
You got a sec?
305
00:10:56,581 --> 00:10:57,931
It's about your vote.
306
00:10:57,975 --> 00:10:59,453
- Please not this again.
- Just...
307
00:10:59,498 --> 00:11:01,934
let me say my piece.
308
00:11:01,979 --> 00:11:05,068
When you were alive,
women couldn't vote.
309
00:11:05,111 --> 00:11:06,897
And when I was alive, we got the vote
310
00:11:06,940 --> 00:11:08,158
but they ain't make it easy.
311
00:11:08,201 --> 00:11:09,942
And for people like me,
312
00:11:09,986 --> 00:11:12,206
it was still almost impossible,
313
00:11:12,250 --> 00:11:14,294
because the Man didn't
want to give up that power.
314
00:11:14,339 --> 00:11:18,691
Yeah, and the Man tried to make
us wear bras and shave our pits.
315
00:11:18,735 --> 00:11:21,128
Drop acid, not bombs!
316
00:11:23,653 --> 00:11:24,957
Okay.
317
00:11:25,001 --> 00:11:26,524
The point is...
318
00:11:28,178 --> 00:11:30,224
... too many people worked too hard
319
00:11:30,268 --> 00:11:33,663
and sacrificed too much for
you to just throw this away.
320
00:11:35,360 --> 00:11:37,100
Alberta...
321
00:11:38,318 --> 00:11:39,798
... you have my vote.
322
00:11:39,842 --> 00:11:41,105
Oh! Yes!
323
00:11:41,148 --> 00:11:42,672
Oh, look at that.
324
00:11:42,715 --> 00:11:44,977
I used my female brain
to exercise my rights
325
00:11:45,022 --> 00:11:46,806
and I don't feel the
vapors coming on at all.
326
00:11:46,850 --> 00:11:48,503
Wait, hold on.
327
00:11:48,547 --> 00:11:49,982
No, I'm good.
328
00:11:50,027 --> 00:11:51,158
- Hey.
- Hey.
329
00:11:51,201 --> 00:11:52,682
Are we alone right now?
330
00:11:52,725 --> 00:11:54,509
- Yes.
- Okay. Check this out.
331
00:11:54,552 --> 00:11:56,816
Turns out Viking bones
are actually really rare
332
00:11:56,860 --> 00:11:58,557
and very valuable.
333
00:11:58,600 --> 00:11:59,863
- Really?
- Yeah.
334
00:11:59,905 --> 00:12:01,734
I called the Natural
History Museum in Albany,
335
00:12:01,778 --> 00:12:04,605
and they say that if the bones
are genuine, they'll buy them.
336
00:12:04,649 --> 00:12:08,087
- Well, for how much?
- Enough to pay for the fountain and the roof.
337
00:12:08,131 --> 00:12:10,917
And extra money to put
a booth in the kitchen
338
00:12:10,961 --> 00:12:13,528
like Chip and Joanna
did in the last season.
339
00:12:13,572 --> 00:12:16,356
The Christmas episode? Empty
nesters looking to downsize?
340
00:12:16,400 --> 00:12:17,836
- That's what I'm talking about, baby.
- Oh.
341
00:12:17,880 --> 00:12:20,100
But I already told Thorfinn.
342
00:12:20,144 --> 00:12:22,754
I know. And I wish there
was another way, but...
343
00:12:22,798 --> 00:12:24,713
we need the money.
344
00:12:24,756 --> 00:12:26,411
And as much as it pains me to say,
345
00:12:26,453 --> 00:12:29,022
I think we got to sell
that big Viking's bones.
346
00:12:29,066 --> 00:12:30,370
Ugh.
347
00:12:30,414 --> 00:12:31,721
Okay, you're right.
348
00:12:33,287 --> 00:12:35,201
How you gonna break it to him?
349
00:12:35,245 --> 00:12:37,203
Um, I will figure something out.
350
00:12:37,248 --> 00:12:39,250
This is gonna be great for us.
351
00:12:39,293 --> 00:12:40,599
Ooh, I'm excited.
352
00:12:40,642 --> 00:12:42,644
- Die, little man!
- Please stop.
353
00:12:47,258 --> 00:12:48,606
So you're saying we
get to vote for this...
354
00:12:48,649 --> 00:12:50,173
- ghost representative thing?
- Mm-hmm.
355
00:12:50,216 --> 00:12:51,653
Oh, absolutely.
356
00:12:51,697 --> 00:12:54,091
You're no different than
those of us who live upstairs.
357
00:12:54,134 --> 00:12:56,528
- Not too close, my dear friend.
- Wow.
358
00:12:56,571 --> 00:12:58,572
- No one ever thinks of us.
- Oh, but I do.
359
00:12:58,616 --> 00:12:59,618
I think of you.
360
00:12:59,661 --> 00:13:01,750
In fact, I will have vivid memories
361
00:13:01,793 --> 00:13:05,318
of this conversation
for a long, long time.
362
00:13:05,363 --> 00:13:06,755
So, can I count on your vote? Hmm?
363
00:13:06,798 --> 00:13:09,715
I promise, if elected,
your voice will be heard.
364
00:13:09,759 --> 00:13:10,759
So...
365
00:13:10,802 --> 00:13:12,065
Um, okay! You know what?
366
00:13:12,109 --> 00:13:13,587
Thank you so much for your support!
367
00:13:13,631 --> 00:13:15,721
I am a man of the people! Good day!
368
00:13:15,764 --> 00:13:17,504
Oh, my God.
369
00:13:18,549 --> 00:13:20,421
Hmm, look at the poor brute.
370
00:13:20,465 --> 00:13:22,075
This is all my fault.
371
00:13:22,119 --> 00:13:23,344
Don't worry. He'll get
over it in, like, 50 years.
372
00:13:23,380 --> 00:13:24,817
He might mention a Norse curse,
373
00:13:24,860 --> 00:13:26,775
but we don't think that's real.
374
00:13:26,818 --> 00:13:28,081
I mean, you know why we did it, right?
375
00:13:28,125 --> 00:13:29,865
It's not like Jay and
I had a choice, right?
376
00:13:29,908 --> 00:13:32,302
Sure, sure. Although
part of me did wonder if,
377
00:13:32,346 --> 00:13:33,539
in finally getting his funeral,
378
00:13:33,540 --> 00:13:35,173
we might see the big oaf get sucked off.
379
00:13:35,174 --> 00:13:37,047
- Excuse me?
- Sometimes...
380
00:13:37,090 --> 00:13:39,918
very rare occasions... when
a ghost is able to resolve
381
00:13:39,962 --> 00:13:43,139
a long-standing issue,
the heavens open up and...
382
00:13:43,182 --> 00:13:44,315
whoosh,
383
00:13:44,357 --> 00:13:45,969
they get sucked off.
384
00:13:46,011 --> 00:13:47,621
- Yeah, we all dream of getting sucked off.
- Mm-hmm.
385
00:13:47,665 --> 00:13:49,014
A... and that's the term
386
00:13:49,058 --> 00:13:50,625
that you guys decided...
387
00:13:50,668 --> 00:13:52,018
Don't tell them. Please?
388
00:13:52,062 --> 00:13:53,453
This is all I have.
389
00:13:53,498 --> 00:13:55,065
Let me get this straight.
390
00:13:55,107 --> 00:13:56,456
So, if we had the funeral,
391
00:13:56,500 --> 00:13:58,284
there's a chance that Thor might...
392
00:13:58,328 --> 00:13:59,328
go up?
393
00:13:59,330 --> 00:14:00,461
- Get sucked off? Mm-hmm.
- Mm-hmm.
394
00:14:00,504 --> 00:14:02,462
But, again, rarely happens.
395
00:14:02,506 --> 00:14:04,378
- I've seen it maybe once.
- But if it did,
396
00:14:04,422 --> 00:14:05,683
we'd never see him again.
397
00:14:05,726 --> 00:14:07,337
Like... ever.
398
00:14:07,380 --> 00:14:08,687
He deserves it though.
399
00:14:08,730 --> 00:14:09,861
Would love to see the
big guy get sucked off.
400
00:14:09,905 --> 00:14:11,602
It would be lovely.
401
00:14:13,344 --> 00:14:14,823
Hey, Thor.
402
00:14:14,866 --> 00:14:16,738
We just came in to see how you're doing.
403
00:14:16,782 --> 00:14:18,217
He grunted.
404
00:14:18,261 --> 00:14:20,177
Thor, I'm really sorry
about the funeral,
405
00:14:20,220 --> 00:14:22,961
but, listen, uh, we're kind of
stretched financially right now.
406
00:14:23,005 --> 00:14:27,662
We literally owe
thousands of penningars.
407
00:14:27,706 --> 00:14:29,316
I looked up Viking money.
408
00:14:29,360 --> 00:14:30,970
- Aw.
- Do what you must.
409
00:14:31,014 --> 00:14:32,841
But know this:
410
00:14:32,884 --> 00:14:35,365
Jormungandr the Midgard Serpent
411
00:14:35,408 --> 00:14:37,498
will be visiting you
in your night sleeps,
412
00:14:37,542 --> 00:14:40,850
and your firstborn child
will have head of cabbage.
413
00:14:40,893 --> 00:14:42,503
Okay, are we good? What's he saying?
414
00:14:42,547 --> 00:14:43,852
It's not great.
415
00:14:43,895 --> 00:14:45,331
Do you want to know the real reason
416
00:14:45,375 --> 00:14:47,552
why I did not get Viking funeral?
417
00:14:47,595 --> 00:14:50,163
Why shipmates did not find Thorfinn?
418
00:14:50,206 --> 00:14:53,340
Thor never tell anyone this.
419
00:14:53,384 --> 00:14:55,865
The reason why I was
wandering here alone
420
00:14:55,908 --> 00:14:58,955
was because...
421
00:14:58,998 --> 00:15:01,086
I was left behind.
422
00:15:18,365 --> 00:15:19,975
They...
423
00:15:20,019 --> 00:15:21,629
abandoned me.
424
00:15:21,673 --> 00:15:23,283
For reasons unknown.
425
00:15:23,326 --> 00:15:24,544
Oh, Thor.
426
00:15:24,588 --> 00:15:26,330
Sam, you stay strong, woman.
427
00:15:28,201 --> 00:15:29,985
And now you...
428
00:15:30,028 --> 00:15:31,988
have abandoned me, too.
429
00:15:36,034 --> 00:15:37,950
His shipmates abandoned him.
430
00:15:37,994 --> 00:15:40,996
Jay, the ghosts told
me that if we help him,
431
00:15:41,039 --> 00:15:43,086
there's a small chance he could get s...
432
00:15:43,129 --> 00:15:44,783
he could move on to the afterlife.
433
00:15:44,826 --> 00:15:45,957
Oh.
434
00:15:46,001 --> 00:15:48,918
Sam, we really need the money.
435
00:15:48,961 --> 00:15:51,355
Yes, we could use the money,
but we would survive without it.
436
00:15:51,398 --> 00:15:52,965
He's been here a thousand years.
437
00:15:53,009 --> 00:15:56,142
Look, I know he's a ghost.
But if we don't help him,
438
00:15:56,186 --> 00:15:58,623
aren't we the real monsters?
439
00:15:58,665 --> 00:16:00,364
Babe, that was so poetic.
440
00:16:00,407 --> 00:16:02,801
- I know, right?
- Oh, my... Mmm.
441
00:16:02,844 --> 00:16:04,889
Oh... All right.
442
00:16:04,933 --> 00:16:06,892
Fine. Fine. Funeral's back on.
443
00:16:06,936 --> 00:16:08,414
Hey, Thor, buddy.
444
00:16:08,458 --> 00:16:09,590
Funeral's back on.
445
00:16:09,634 --> 00:16:11,027
Oh, no, he left the room.
446
00:16:11,070 --> 00:16:12,592
Okay. This is getting really confusing.
447
00:16:12,636 --> 00:16:13,942
We got to work on this. Thor!
448
00:16:13,985 --> 00:16:15,988
- Thor!
- Thor! The funeral's on!
449
00:16:16,032 --> 00:16:17,032
Yes!
450
00:16:17,033 --> 00:16:18,947
By the fangs of Fenrir,
451
00:16:18,990 --> 00:16:20,036
I thank you.
452
00:16:20,078 --> 00:16:21,951
Is he happy?
453
00:16:21,994 --> 00:16:23,908
Yay!
454
00:16:23,952 --> 00:16:25,258
Oh, so about that curse...
455
00:16:25,302 --> 00:16:26,868
Can't be undone.
456
00:16:26,912 --> 00:16:28,173
Sorry.
457
00:16:28,217 --> 00:16:29,567
What curse?
458
00:16:29,610 --> 00:16:32,570
It gives me great pleasure
459
00:16:32,613 --> 00:16:35,268
to cast the deciding vote for...
460
00:16:35,312 --> 00:16:36,312
Alberta!
461
00:16:37,618 --> 00:16:39,576
Who made me realize
that women should vote.
462
00:16:39,620 --> 00:16:41,796
Although I'm still against
them going to college.
463
00:16:41,840 --> 00:16:45,625
Baby steps. Isaac, you
ran a good campaign.
464
00:16:45,669 --> 00:16:47,105
Just not as good as mine.
465
00:16:47,149 --> 00:16:52,633
Point of order: I believe not
all the votes have been counted.
466
00:16:52,677 --> 00:16:54,808
- Oh, God.
- You may have thought
467
00:16:54,852 --> 00:16:56,768
your upstairs votes
were all that mattered.
468
00:16:56,811 --> 00:16:58,248
But true democracy
469
00:16:58,290 --> 00:17:00,336
leaves no one behind.
470
00:17:00,379 --> 00:17:02,120
And they stand with me.
471
00:17:02,164 --> 00:17:03,774
But not too close. Not too close.
472
00:17:03,817 --> 00:17:05,864
Well, this seems a little underhanded.
473
00:17:05,906 --> 00:17:07,952
Let the coronation proceed.
474
00:17:07,997 --> 00:17:09,606
Ooh. Yeah.
475
00:17:09,650 --> 00:17:12,044
We're all voting for Creepy Dirk.
476
00:17:14,873 --> 00:17:16,527
But that would make him the winner.
477
00:17:16,569 --> 00:17:18,268
So, uh,
478
00:17:18,310 --> 00:17:21,880
when do I get to talk to
the lady that smells good?
479
00:17:23,098 --> 00:17:24,403
Yeah, democracy is broken.
480
00:17:24,448 --> 00:17:26,884
It's a flawed system, everyone.
481
00:17:26,928 --> 00:17:29,192
- All right. Now, remember, just like we talked about.
- Ooh!
482
00:17:29,234 --> 00:17:30,540
- Keep your back straight.
- Keep your back straight.
483
00:17:30,584 --> 00:17:32,325
- Mm-hmm.
- Now pull back slowly but evenly
484
00:17:32,368 --> 00:17:33,369
- with the first...
- Now pull back...
485
00:17:33,413 --> 00:17:36,415
I would take Pete's advice
on this with a grain of salt.
486
00:17:36,460 --> 00:17:38,375
... of your index and middle fingers.
487
00:17:43,641 --> 00:17:45,772
Bravo, bravo.
488
00:17:45,817 --> 00:17:47,949
Thor wants to thank
Samantha and small man
489
00:17:47,992 --> 00:17:50,343
for making special day possible.
490
00:17:50,386 --> 00:17:52,388
Though I wish you
would have secured mead.
491
00:17:52,432 --> 00:17:54,173
But we'll let that go.
492
00:17:54,217 --> 00:17:55,826
- You're welcome, Thor.
- Mm-hmm.
493
00:17:58,221 --> 00:17:59,874
Sometimes you meet a bro
494
00:17:59,917 --> 00:18:01,701
and you're like, "This is a bro... "
495
00:18:01,746 --> 00:18:03,182
I just wanted to say that,
496
00:18:03,226 --> 00:18:05,357
even though neither
of us won the election,
497
00:18:05,402 --> 00:18:06,663
you have won my respect.
498
00:18:06,707 --> 00:18:08,186
Where is this going?
499
00:18:08,230 --> 00:18:09,710
I resorted to dirty tricks,
500
00:18:09,753 --> 00:18:11,885
and you, you inspired people.
501
00:18:11,930 --> 00:18:13,887
That's the mark of a
truly talented politician.
502
00:18:13,932 --> 00:18:16,847
Well, you know, I do
have that star quality.
503
00:18:16,891 --> 00:18:18,893
Oh, I didn't mean to
imply that you don't.
504
00:18:18,936 --> 00:18:20,807
No, it's a fair critique.
505
00:18:20,852 --> 00:18:22,375
I was never the type the commoners liked
506
00:18:22,419 --> 00:18:24,073
to have an ale with.
507
00:18:24,115 --> 00:18:26,204
Those dirty, filthy, ignorant commoners.
508
00:18:26,249 --> 00:18:27,902
Hard to see why they didn't like you.
509
00:18:27,945 --> 00:18:30,817
Agreed. It's a mystery.
510
00:18:30,862 --> 00:18:33,298
Now is typically time
when we have orgy. But...
511
00:18:33,343 --> 00:18:35,432
orgy without mead is...
512
00:18:35,474 --> 00:18:36,693
very awkward.
513
00:18:39,913 --> 00:18:41,525
Oh! It's happening!
514
00:18:41,567 --> 00:18:43,961
He is getting sucked off!
515
00:18:44,005 --> 00:18:46,834
By the eye of the All-father!
516
00:18:46,877 --> 00:18:48,270
Valhalla!
517
00:18:48,314 --> 00:18:49,314
Wait!
518
00:18:51,230 --> 00:18:52,449
Thorfinn, I love you.
519
00:18:52,491 --> 00:18:53,927
Oh.
520
00:18:53,971 --> 00:18:55,278
I've always loved you.
521
00:18:55,320 --> 00:18:57,236
Why you wait till now to say this?
522
00:18:57,279 --> 00:18:58,802
So many years wasted!
523
00:19:00,239 --> 00:19:02,936
Please extinguish the fire
in the middle of the pond!
524
00:19:02,980 --> 00:19:04,634
You do not have a permit.
525
00:19:04,678 --> 00:19:08,116
- Sorry!
- Yeah, I'll take care of it right now! Thank you!
526
00:19:08,160 --> 00:19:09,856
Uh...
527
00:19:12,076 --> 00:19:15,471
So, now seems like
we have second chance.
528
00:19:15,515 --> 00:19:18,605
You know, I think I kind of
got caught up in the moment.
529
00:19:18,648 --> 00:19:20,346
Yeah. Just...
530
00:19:20,390 --> 00:19:22,173
And I-I don't really
want to be tied down.
531
00:19:22,218 --> 00:19:24,436
- Moving on!
- Yeah.
532
00:19:24,480 --> 00:19:26,090
- Not in love.
- Cool, cool.
533
00:19:26,134 --> 00:19:29,007
Thank you for doing all this.
It really meant a lot to him.
534
00:19:29,049 --> 00:19:32,315
I'm glad. And, um, don't worry
about the house and everything.
535
00:19:32,357 --> 00:19:36,013
We got a lot to fix up,
but we'll figure it out.
536
00:19:36,057 --> 00:19:37,450
Custom booth would've been nice.
537
00:19:37,493 --> 00:19:39,451
It would've been a game changer.
538
00:19:39,496 --> 00:19:42,280
But I got to say, watching
my man fire that arrow,
539
00:19:42,325 --> 00:19:43,630
pretty hot.
540
00:19:43,673 --> 00:19:45,327
Indeed.
541
00:19:45,371 --> 00:19:46,372
The fire.
542
00:19:46,415 --> 00:19:47,981
The fire is what's hot.
543
00:19:48,026 --> 00:19:50,768
As fire is. And no one
can argue with that.
544
00:19:50,810 --> 00:19:52,422
So...
545
00:19:52,464 --> 00:19:54,250
How are you, big guy?
546
00:19:54,292 --> 00:19:56,121
I am happy.
547
00:19:56,164 --> 00:19:58,432
It was not time for
Thor to be sucked off.
548
00:19:59,519 --> 00:20:02,474
Shipmates may have
abandoned Thor, but...
549
00:20:02,519 --> 00:20:04,477
you did not.
550
00:20:04,520 --> 00:20:06,348
And that goes for all of you!
551
00:20:06,392 --> 00:20:09,002
You have never abandoned me.
552
00:20:09,047 --> 00:20:10,308
And for that,
553
00:20:10,353 --> 00:20:14,400
- I am thankful! Thank you.
- How could we abandon him?
554
00:20:14,443 --> 00:20:15,662
We literally can't leave.
555
00:20:15,705 --> 00:20:18,400
- Shh. Just let him have this.
- Okay.
556
00:20:18,443 --> 00:20:19,705
- We would never leave you.
- Rejoice!
557
00:20:29,009 --> 00:20:30,142
So we'll meet down here once a week to
558
00:20:30,185 --> 00:20:33,144
go over the ghost requests.
559
00:20:33,189 --> 00:20:34,451
- Uh-huh.
- First request...
560
00:20:34,493 --> 00:20:35,886
this comes from Stuart...
561
00:20:35,930 --> 00:20:38,802
do you mind if he smells you?
562
00:20:38,846 --> 00:20:40,413
Nope, not doing this. Sorry, guys.
563
00:20:40,457 --> 00:20:42,111
Aw...
564
00:20:43,000 --> 00:20:48,000
- Synced and corrected by chamallow -
- www.addic7ed.com -
40629
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