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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:04,162 WWW.MY-SUBS.CO 1 00:00:00,016 --> 00:00:04,906 - Synced & Corrected by Dragoniod - www.MY-SUBS.com 2 00:00:25,568 --> 00:00:29,198 So, there's the bathroom, kitchen, the living room, 3 00:00:29,280 --> 00:00:31,280 Justin sleeps in there 4 00:00:31,365 --> 00:00:33,945 and... this, 5 00:00:34,034 --> 00:00:37,004 this is my bedroom. 6 00:00:40,082 --> 00:00:41,382 Cool. 7 00:00:41,459 --> 00:00:43,459 Yeah. Bedrooms are... are great. 8 00:00:43,544 --> 00:00:44,884 I have one too. 9 00:00:49,508 --> 00:00:51,718 So, do you want to, like, do something? 10 00:00:51,802 --> 00:00:53,472 Justin and your parents should be 11 00:00:53,554 --> 00:00:55,894 at the euchre tournament for a few more hours, so... 12 00:00:55,973 --> 00:00:57,433 Ah, all away. 13 00:00:57,516 --> 00:00:59,266 We could... We could watch a movie. 14 00:01:00,102 --> 00:01:02,192 The Wi-Fi got fried in the storm last night. 15 00:01:02,271 --> 00:01:03,941 Riley's coming by to fix it later. 16 00:01:04,815 --> 00:01:08,735 Oh, we do have this Croatian bootleg of Dharma and Greg. 17 00:01:10,112 --> 00:01:11,662 - Season four. - Oh, great. 18 00:01:14,825 --> 00:01:17,825 Or you could just kiss me. 19 00:01:21,749 --> 00:01:22,999 Maybe that. 20 00:01:29,507 --> 00:01:32,507 - What up, fam? - We interrupting? 21 00:01:32,593 --> 00:01:35,353 - Kind of. - Yeah, well, we're bored. 22 00:01:38,265 --> 00:01:40,640 Who wants to find out why this is called the murder cabin? 23 00:01:42,269 --> 00:01:45,189 Ooohh... 24 00:01:48,234 --> 00:01:49,864 Put your fingers on the board. 25 00:01:53,364 --> 00:01:56,334 We are attempting contact with the spirit world. 26 00:01:56,408 --> 00:01:59,078 Lost souls trapped between our world and the next. 27 00:01:59,161 --> 00:02:01,871 So, close your eyes, clear your mind. 28 00:02:01,956 --> 00:02:03,116 Any tips, Keri? 29 00:02:04,375 --> 00:02:06,745 White eyeliner makes eye shadow pop. 30 00:02:07,461 --> 00:02:08,878 That's actually a really good tip. 31 00:02:12,550 --> 00:02:15,890 - Is there a spirit among us? - Ooooh. 32 00:02:15,970 --> 00:02:17,510 Guys, focus. 33 00:02:18,514 --> 00:02:21,184 Is there a spirit among us? 34 00:02:32,570 --> 00:02:33,860 Welcome, spirit. 35 00:02:34,947 --> 00:02:36,987 We come seeking answers. 36 00:02:38,033 --> 00:02:40,543 When will Billie and Killian go to Bone Town? 37 00:02:40,619 --> 00:02:42,909 So dumb. 38 00:02:42,997 --> 00:02:45,037 Ah, keep your finger on the board 39 00:02:45,124 --> 00:02:46,583 or you'll invite an evil spirit in. 40 00:02:50,629 --> 00:02:53,509 Do you have a name, wandering spirit? 41 00:03:22,411 --> 00:03:23,911 Yes, I am? 42 00:03:26,749 --> 00:03:28,039 What do you want, Ysiam? 43 00:03:41,138 --> 00:03:42,468 Do you mean blood? 44 00:03:49,563 --> 00:03:50,983 There’s six of us. 45 00:03:55,402 --> 00:03:57,282 Weed break. 46 00:04:01,492 --> 00:04:03,492 Which one of you bitches finished my stash? 47 00:04:03,577 --> 00:04:05,037 In our defense... 48 00:04:06,080 --> 00:04:08,420 Yeah, we did. 49 00:04:09,124 --> 00:04:11,214 I'm going to Ulrika’s to borrow a cup of bud 50 00:04:11,293 --> 00:04:13,253 while she’s at the tournament. 51 00:04:13,337 --> 00:04:15,457 Won’t she notice? 52 00:04:15,547 --> 00:04:17,417 Who do you think taught me how to roll? 53 00:04:25,391 --> 00:04:27,561 Okay, which one of you moved it? 54 00:04:27,643 --> 00:04:30,603 - Don't look at me. - Keri can barely spell. 55 00:04:32,398 --> 00:04:34,148 I'm better with shapes. 56 00:04:43,325 --> 00:04:44,735 What's taking her so long? 57 00:04:44,827 --> 00:04:46,997 Ready to stick pins in my eyes. 58 00:04:47,079 --> 00:04:49,209 We could watch Dharma and Janko 59 00:04:49,289 --> 00:04:50,499 ‘til she gets back. 60 00:04:51,166 --> 00:04:53,036 Janko’s hilarious. 61 00:04:54,294 --> 00:04:55,634 What was that? 62 00:05:01,051 --> 00:05:02,431 Holy shit. 63 00:05:02,511 --> 00:05:04,101 What the hell is that? 64 00:05:05,597 --> 00:05:07,137 Are those Olive’s jeans? 65 00:05:09,893 --> 00:05:12,653 “One down. Five to go.” 66 00:05:32,166 --> 00:05:34,036 I bet Olive’s just messing with us 67 00:05:34,126 --> 00:05:36,122 - for stealing her weed. - Or stealing her homework. 68 00:05:36,128 --> 00:05:37,798 Or toasting her lizard. 69 00:05:39,590 --> 00:05:40,630 He looked cold. 70 00:05:45,012 --> 00:05:46,929 - Wait, what? - What the hell is that? 71 00:05:46,972 --> 00:05:50,142 Is that a fucking crossbow? 72 00:05:53,228 --> 00:05:55,148 Oh, nice shot! 73 00:05:56,273 --> 00:05:58,233 Oh, my God. Go, go, go, go, go. 74 00:06:01,945 --> 00:06:03,445 Go, go, go, go, go, go, go. 75 00:06:03,489 --> 00:06:05,119 Killian, lock the other door. Call 911. 76 00:06:06,492 --> 00:06:08,912 No signal. Wi-Fi’s still down. 77 00:06:11,246 --> 00:06:12,996 Aah! How does this thing work? 78 00:06:13,082 --> 00:06:14,672 They're going back into the woods. 79 00:06:15,250 --> 00:06:17,880 - Oh, God. Oh, God. - Do you think Olive’s dead? 80 00:06:17,961 --> 00:06:20,011 No, Olive’s a stoner. 81 00:06:20,089 --> 00:06:21,879 They always survive until the last act. 82 00:06:21,965 --> 00:06:23,795 - You need them for comedy. - This isn't a movie, nerd. 83 00:06:23,801 --> 00:06:25,931 Guys, we have to make a run for the dock right now. 84 00:06:26,011 --> 00:06:28,601 Do you want to be the dumb jock that eats it in the first act? 85 00:06:28,680 --> 00:06:31,097 - You can’t outrun an arrow. - If he’s the jock who are we? 86 00:06:31,141 --> 00:06:33,641 I’m the final girl, so you guys are the dumb slu... 87 00:06:33,727 --> 00:06:35,557 Fun girls. You guys are the fun girls. 88 00:06:35,646 --> 00:06:37,476 What are we going to do? 89 00:06:39,233 --> 00:06:41,903 Well, the killer always tries to separate us, right? 90 00:06:41,985 --> 00:06:45,275 Makes us easier to pick off, so we stick together 91 00:06:45,364 --> 00:06:48,374 until the signal comes back or until our parents come home. 92 00:06:48,450 --> 00:06:49,660 Okay. 93 00:06:49,743 --> 00:06:51,043 Yeah. 94 00:07:01,922 --> 00:07:03,672 Shouldn't you fill that with boiling water? 95 00:07:04,341 --> 00:07:05,931 Why? Do you want soup? 96 00:07:06,009 --> 00:07:08,179 Can anyone hear that? 97 00:07:09,304 --> 00:07:10,724 Guys? 98 00:07:11,682 --> 00:07:13,352 Keri! 99 00:07:13,433 --> 00:07:15,103 No, no, no, no. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. 100 00:07:15,185 --> 00:07:16,645 No, no, let me go, okay? 101 00:07:16,728 --> 00:07:18,270 I was bullied by my imaginary friend. 102 00:07:18,313 --> 00:07:20,573 - Ghosts hate me. - No, no, no. 103 00:07:20,649 --> 00:07:22,529 It’s just the wind or something. 104 00:07:24,111 --> 00:07:25,241 Holy shit! 105 00:07:25,320 --> 00:07:27,360 Keri! 106 00:07:27,447 --> 00:07:30,077 Keri! Keri! No! I will not be an only child. 107 00:07:30,159 --> 00:07:31,539 They’re weird and self-obsessed. 108 00:07:31,618 --> 00:07:33,448 - I'm an only child. - Yeah, see? 109 00:07:38,834 --> 00:07:40,384 Everything will be just fine 110 00:07:40,460 --> 00:07:42,000 if we just stick to... 111 00:07:43,505 --> 00:07:45,130 Together. 112 00:07:57,394 --> 00:07:59,024 Open up! Is anyone there? 113 00:07:59,104 --> 00:08:00,444 Oh, Riley, thank God! 114 00:08:00,522 --> 00:08:03,152 Oh, God. 115 00:08:04,109 --> 00:08:05,739 What the hell is going on? 116 00:08:05,819 --> 00:08:07,773 Some crazy crossbow freak chased me off the deck. 117 00:08:07,779 --> 00:08:09,279 I barely made it inside. 118 00:08:09,364 --> 00:08:10,985 We know, we've been trying to call for help, 119 00:08:10,991 --> 00:08:12,371 but the signal's still down. 120 00:08:12,451 --> 00:08:14,451 - Can you fix it? - I brought your cable. 121 00:08:14,536 --> 00:08:16,406 but there is no way I'm going out there 122 00:08:16,496 --> 00:08:18,916 with a crossbow bathrobe psycho. 123 00:08:22,544 --> 00:08:24,004 Fuck. 124 00:08:24,963 --> 00:08:26,723 Did you use that? 125 00:08:26,798 --> 00:08:28,008 In here? 126 00:08:29,384 --> 00:08:31,854 Does the name Ysiam mean anything to you? 127 00:08:33,805 --> 00:08:35,385 Shit, shit. 128 00:08:37,184 --> 00:08:39,904 Local legend says that this rock was once 129 00:08:39,978 --> 00:08:41,558 a witch coven’s party pad. 130 00:08:41,647 --> 00:08:44,687 Some locals drowned the coven 131 00:08:44,775 --> 00:08:46,435 and the head witch cursed this place, 132 00:08:46,526 --> 00:08:50,106 asking for blood if anyone disturbed their rest. 133 00:08:52,449 --> 00:08:54,119 I thought it was bullshit, but... 134 00:08:55,827 --> 00:08:57,957 the head witch’s name was Ysiam. 135 00:08:59,539 --> 00:09:01,329 Fuck. 136 00:09:01,416 --> 00:09:04,706 Story has it the only way to send her followers back... 137 00:09:06,588 --> 00:09:08,378 is with the blood of six virgins. 138 00:09:09,883 --> 00:09:12,843 - Keri’s a virgin? - Such a liar. 139 00:09:15,013 --> 00:09:17,143 - Where's Keri? - Too soon. 140 00:09:21,270 --> 00:09:23,520 We can't just stay here and let them pick us off. 141 00:09:24,356 --> 00:09:25,816 Okay. 142 00:09:27,901 --> 00:09:29,701 All right. We make a run for my boat. 143 00:09:29,778 --> 00:09:31,524 We'll get to the Boathouse, we’ll call for help. 144 00:09:31,530 --> 00:09:33,200 If you don't die, come back for us, ‘kay? 145 00:09:33,282 --> 00:09:35,032 And bring us some snacks. Yours suck. 146 00:09:38,870 --> 00:09:40,540 How many of those freaks did you see 147 00:09:40,622 --> 00:09:41,962 when you were on the roof? 148 00:09:44,251 --> 00:09:45,381 I wasn't on the roof. 149 00:09:59,558 --> 00:10:01,438 Ah! Well, fuck me in half. 150 00:10:01,518 --> 00:10:02,888 - Why? What's wrong? - My boat’s gone. 151 00:10:02,894 --> 00:10:04,904 Okay. Okay. 152 00:10:04,980 --> 00:10:07,230 We need to go back to the cabin like now, alright? 153 00:10:07,316 --> 00:10:09,316 Ah, fuck! 154 00:10:09,401 --> 00:10:11,111 Oh, my God! Fuck! 155 00:10:11,194 --> 00:10:13,364 Holy shit, Riley! 156 00:10:13,447 --> 00:10:16,157 - Killian! Oh, fuck. - Go! Go! 157 00:10:16,241 --> 00:10:18,081 - I’m right behind you. - Okay. 158 00:10:18,160 --> 00:10:20,540 Get inside. Get inside. Get inside. 159 00:10:23,999 --> 00:10:25,999 - He’s gone. - Who’s gone? 160 00:10:26,084 --> 00:10:28,004 - Riley! - Did he fix the internet? 161 00:10:28,086 --> 00:10:30,506 - What? - Billie! I’m coming! 162 00:10:30,589 --> 00:10:32,460 - Justin? - No, no, no, no, no. 163 00:10:32,466 --> 00:10:34,256 Move. I have to go after him. 164 00:10:34,343 --> 00:10:36,302 No, in New Moon when Bella hears Edward's voice, 165 00:10:36,345 --> 00:10:38,635 it's just... it's just her mind playing tricks on her. 166 00:10:38,722 --> 00:10:40,932 - Is this Twilight again? - It's a horror movie too. 167 00:10:41,016 --> 00:10:42,976 Well, falling in love’s scary. 168 00:10:43,894 --> 00:10:46,404 Man, the shit we take from you horror purists online. 169 00:10:47,272 --> 00:10:50,032 Online. Riley’s cable. 170 00:10:50,108 --> 00:10:51,608 We can replace it and call for help 171 00:10:51,693 --> 00:10:53,568 - without a phone signal. - Where's the modem? 172 00:10:53,612 --> 00:10:55,242 In the crawlspace under the cabin. 173 00:10:55,322 --> 00:10:57,162 Of course it is. 174 00:10:57,240 --> 00:10:58,830 I'll just run down there and swap it. 175 00:10:58,909 --> 00:11:01,199 And then when I get back, we can bring up FaceTime 176 00:11:01,286 --> 00:11:03,203 and bunker down until someone comes to help us. 177 00:11:04,623 --> 00:11:08,293 - There's more of them now. - Okay. Distract them. 178 00:11:08,377 --> 00:11:10,247 Not that kind of fun girl. 179 00:11:12,255 --> 00:11:15,175 - Yeah. Go. - Be careful. 180 00:11:16,802 --> 00:11:18,052 Be fast. 181 00:11:26,645 --> 00:11:29,265 Come get me you Volturi sons of bitches. 182 00:11:33,068 --> 00:11:34,898 Thank God he's hot. 183 00:11:34,986 --> 00:11:36,606 - Yeah. - Yeah. 184 00:11:37,489 --> 00:11:41,159 Come on! Let's go! I’m right here! 185 00:11:41,243 --> 00:11:43,489 Bring it on, motherfucker! 186 00:11:43,495 --> 00:11:45,825 Okay. Okay, Billie. We’re gonna do this. 187 00:11:45,914 --> 00:11:48,004 You’re not gonna die in this shitty fucking cabin. 188 00:11:48,834 --> 00:11:50,964 God. Oh, my God! 189 00:11:51,044 --> 00:11:53,424 Oh, God. Okay. Oh, shit. Shit. 190 00:11:53,505 --> 00:11:55,665 Okay. Killian! 191 00:11:56,800 --> 00:11:58,840 - Killian? - Open the door! 192 00:11:58,927 --> 00:12:01,097 - Killian! - Come on, come on! 193 00:12:01,972 --> 00:12:04,142 Open the door, Teri! 194 00:12:04,224 --> 00:12:05,511 Did you reboot the modem? 195 00:12:05,517 --> 00:12:07,017 No, there's too many of them. 196 00:12:07,102 --> 00:12:08,772 Maybe they'll leave once they have you. 197 00:12:08,854 --> 00:12:10,564 You’re the final girl. 198 00:12:10,647 --> 00:12:12,767 Aah! Come on! Come on, I have an idea. 199 00:12:18,155 --> 00:12:19,315 We can jump. 200 00:12:20,073 --> 00:12:21,663 Are you nuts? 201 00:12:21,741 --> 00:12:23,571 Jumping is always scarier than the water, remember? 202 00:12:23,577 --> 00:12:25,697 At Raven’s Rock, not the Cabin in the Woods. 203 00:12:25,787 --> 00:12:27,287 Okay, on three. 204 00:12:27,372 --> 00:12:28,832 Okay. 205 00:12:28,915 --> 00:12:30,075 One. 206 00:12:30,167 --> 00:12:31,417 Two. 207 00:12:44,556 --> 00:12:46,136 Cabin in the Woods. 208 00:12:46,224 --> 00:12:48,314 Do you have a name, wandering spirit? 209 00:12:48,393 --> 00:12:49,483 Are those Olive’s jeans? 210 00:12:49,561 --> 00:12:50,691 - Y. - BRB. 211 00:12:50,770 --> 00:12:52,310 - S. - Open up! 212 00:12:52,397 --> 00:12:54,357 Do you want to be the dumb jock that 213 00:12:54,441 --> 00:12:55,781 - eats it in the first half? - I. 214 00:12:55,859 --> 00:12:57,279 This isn't a movie. 215 00:12:57,360 --> 00:12:58,990 - I thought it was bullshit... - A. 216 00:12:59,070 --> 00:13:00,490 The head witch’s name was Ysiam. 217 00:13:00,572 --> 00:13:02,322 - M. - You’re the final girl! 218 00:13:02,407 --> 00:13:03,737 Cabin in the Woods. 219 00:13:04,367 --> 00:13:05,577 Cabin in the fucking woods! 220 00:13:05,660 --> 00:13:07,160 No, Billie, wait! 221 00:13:15,086 --> 00:13:17,376 Hey, Opal Bader Ginsberg. 222 00:13:17,464 --> 00:13:18,974 - You there? - Go ahead, Olive. 223 00:13:19,049 --> 00:13:20,879 I’m clear of the cabin. 224 00:13:20,967 --> 00:13:23,047 Ouija board’s in place, phone jammer’s on. 225 00:13:23,136 --> 00:13:25,846 I'm heading to Ulrika’s until Prank Day is over. 226 00:13:25,931 --> 00:13:27,431 Do they suspect the gag of it all? 227 00:13:27,516 --> 00:13:28,886 Not a clue. 228 00:13:28,975 --> 00:13:30,595 My generation is screwed. 229 00:13:30,685 --> 00:13:32,225 That's a go, everyone. 230 00:13:32,312 --> 00:13:33,974 Walkies stay on for further instructions. 231 00:13:33,980 --> 00:13:35,610 Jane, prep the arrow. 232 00:13:35,690 --> 00:13:37,320 Don't skimp on the blood. 233 00:13:37,400 --> 00:13:39,030 Copy that Opie-dopes. Question. 234 00:13:39,110 --> 00:13:41,070 Am I just sticking the arrow into the door 235 00:13:41,154 --> 00:13:42,566 or am I actually firing the crossbow? 236 00:13:42,572 --> 00:13:44,072 What? 237 00:13:44,157 --> 00:13:45,824 Shooting would be more immersive. 238 00:13:45,867 --> 00:13:47,697 That's what I said. Told you, Jayner. 239 00:13:47,786 --> 00:13:49,496 - This is a bad idea. - Mm, it’s a beauty. 240 00:13:49,579 --> 00:13:51,709 No. Wayne, stop. All right? 241 00:13:51,790 --> 00:13:53,500 Nobody is shooting anyone with anything. 242 00:13:53,583 --> 00:13:56,553 Opal, when did blood and crossbows come into this? 243 00:13:56,628 --> 00:13:58,588 Guys, I want Billie to remember Prank Day 244 00:13:58,672 --> 00:14:00,722 with a smile, okay, not regression therapy. 245 00:14:00,799 --> 00:14:02,339 She’s not gonna come back next year 246 00:14:02,425 --> 00:14:03,712 if she's still having nightmares about it. 247 00:14:03,718 --> 00:14:04,838 This isn't your high school's 248 00:14:04,844 --> 00:14:06,054 dinner theatre, Justin. 249 00:14:06,137 --> 00:14:08,007 It's my opus. 250 00:14:08,098 --> 00:14:10,308 Did you hear that? 251 00:14:10,392 --> 00:14:12,692 Justin wants to come back next summer with Billie. 252 00:14:12,769 --> 00:14:14,149 That would be a real win for him. 253 00:14:14,229 --> 00:14:15,859 And a real loss for us. 254 00:14:15,939 --> 00:14:17,359 Since Justin has been here, 255 00:14:17,440 --> 00:14:19,610 we have lost an election, a bathroom, 256 00:14:19,693 --> 00:14:21,903 and our son might lose his virginity to his cousin. 257 00:14:21,987 --> 00:14:23,407 - Step-cousin. - Ugh. 258 00:14:23,488 --> 00:14:24,858 Still gross. 259 00:14:24,948 --> 00:14:26,618 We cannot lose anything else to Justin. 260 00:14:26,700 --> 00:14:28,450 We have to make sure they never come back. 261 00:14:28,535 --> 00:14:30,075 How? 262 00:14:30,161 --> 00:14:31,871 By scaring Billie so much 263 00:14:31,955 --> 00:14:33,705 that she calls her parents to come get her. 264 00:14:33,790 --> 00:14:36,040 There's no way they'll let her come back after that. 265 00:14:36,126 --> 00:14:37,376 Sounds a little harsh. 266 00:14:37,460 --> 00:14:38,630 It was Justin's idea 267 00:14:38,712 --> 00:14:39,802 to bring back Prank Day. 268 00:14:39,879 --> 00:14:41,049 He made his own bed. 269 00:14:44,634 --> 00:14:46,724 Oh, nice shot! 270 00:14:46,803 --> 00:14:48,933 - That's my boy! - Victor! 271 00:14:49,806 --> 00:14:51,096 - That’s our boy. - Oh, my God! 272 00:14:51,182 --> 00:14:52,386 Get inside! Go, go! 273 00:14:52,392 --> 00:14:54,022 Wayne! Come on! 274 00:14:54,102 --> 00:14:57,362 Okay. Okay. Hold on. What happened back there? 275 00:14:57,439 --> 00:15:00,439 - You got hit with a rock. - Was I there for that? 276 00:15:00,525 --> 00:15:02,435 You were supposed to wait like we practiced. 277 00:15:02,527 --> 00:15:04,567 - You never listen. - Okay, okay, okay. 278 00:15:04,654 --> 00:15:06,954 Next time you get hit in the head with a rock. 279 00:15:07,032 --> 00:15:08,662 - Thank you. - Great. Come on, come on. 280 00:15:08,742 --> 00:15:10,542 - We gotta go. - No, this way. 281 00:15:10,619 --> 00:15:12,249 Right. Okay. 282 00:15:12,329 --> 00:15:14,369 - What happened back there? - Oh, my... 283 00:15:14,456 --> 00:15:16,076 They barricaded themselves inside the cabin 284 00:15:16,082 --> 00:15:17,922 right on schedule. 285 00:15:18,001 --> 00:15:19,580 Dad, you in position for Operation Ouija Magnet? 286 00:15:19,586 --> 00:15:21,046 In the hammer lane, little buddy. 287 00:15:21,129 --> 00:15:22,709 Spy talk, not trucker talk. 288 00:15:22,797 --> 00:15:24,627 That’s like asking a fish not to swim. 289 00:15:24,716 --> 00:15:26,378 Magnets in the planchette are pretty snappy 290 00:15:26,384 --> 00:15:27,974 so don’t work too hard. 291 00:15:28,053 --> 00:15:29,933 - 10-4. - Second warning. 292 00:15:30,013 --> 00:15:31,643 Whatever. 293 00:15:31,723 --> 00:15:33,563 Maisy, what the fuck? 294 00:15:33,642 --> 00:15:35,812 This is supposed to be Scooby-Doo scary. 295 00:15:35,894 --> 00:15:37,314 Shh, shh, shh. 296 00:15:37,395 --> 00:15:39,355 It’ll all be over soon, sweetie. 297 00:15:39,439 --> 00:15:40,976 Hey, hey, Assassin's Creed, she can't breathe. 298 00:15:40,982 --> 00:15:42,982 - Sorry. - Can't be too careful. 299 00:15:43,068 --> 00:15:44,938 There are witches in these woods. 300 00:15:45,028 --> 00:15:46,649 All right, this shit’s getting out of hand. 301 00:15:46,655 --> 00:15:48,155 Maisy, this is exactly why Prank Day 302 00:15:48,198 --> 00:15:49,573 was cancelled in the first place. 303 00:15:49,616 --> 00:15:50,736 No, you're the reason 304 00:15:50,825 --> 00:15:52,235 that Prank Day got cancelled. 305 00:15:52,327 --> 00:15:54,367 Who can't handle a fake alien abduction? 306 00:15:54,454 --> 00:15:56,464 You told them to eat me first 307 00:15:56,539 --> 00:15:58,079 because I had more meat. 308 00:15:58,166 --> 00:15:59,870 - And I stand by that decision. - Oh, my God. 309 00:15:59,876 --> 00:16:01,746 You wanted to bring Prank Day back 310 00:16:01,836 --> 00:16:03,248 because Billie is this huge horror fan, 311 00:16:03,254 --> 00:16:04,674 but if it doesn't feel real, 312 00:16:04,756 --> 00:16:06,836 she's going to be the first to clock it. 313 00:16:06,925 --> 00:16:09,675 So just sit back and let Ysiam work her magic. 314 00:16:09,761 --> 00:16:11,006 Should have been my name backwards. 315 00:16:11,012 --> 00:16:12,432 It was my idea. 316 00:16:12,514 --> 00:16:14,354 Nitsuj sounds like a lice shampoo. 317 00:16:15,600 --> 00:16:17,690 Come on, honey, Opal’s got snacks in the car. 318 00:16:18,895 --> 00:16:20,355 You can bring your kettle. 319 00:16:24,984 --> 00:16:26,784 Wayne Eunice Beverly Moore, 320 00:16:26,861 --> 00:16:28,411 you get your ass down! 321 00:16:28,488 --> 00:16:30,948 I was supposed to do the roof walk. 322 00:16:31,032 --> 00:16:32,782 The roof can’t handle your weight! 323 00:16:32,867 --> 00:16:35,747 - You can't go rogue like that. - Hey, I’m Wayne. 324 00:16:35,829 --> 00:16:37,659 Don't remind me. 325 00:16:37,747 --> 00:16:40,167 That's a cool dress. 326 00:16:41,751 --> 00:16:43,461 Falcons have fled the nest. 327 00:16:43,545 --> 00:16:45,165 Riley and the kids are leaving the cabin. 328 00:16:45,171 --> 00:16:47,091 We got to hustle if we want to beat the kids 329 00:16:47,173 --> 00:16:48,763 to the Boathouse for the hood reveal. 330 00:16:48,842 --> 00:16:50,842 We're not doing the Boathouse thing anymore. 331 00:16:50,927 --> 00:16:52,423 Yeah, there have been some last-minute rewrites. 332 00:16:52,429 --> 00:16:54,219 What do you mean? What kind of rewrites? 333 00:16:54,305 --> 00:16:55,843 Opal and I thought that ending the prank 334 00:16:55,849 --> 00:16:57,429 with the hood reveal was a bit tame. 335 00:16:57,517 --> 00:16:59,304 Relax, we're just shooting and abducting Riley, 336 00:16:59,310 --> 00:17:00,973 and then we're surrounding the kids so they think 337 00:17:00,979 --> 00:17:02,809 - that Ysiam is coming. - And then what? 338 00:17:02,897 --> 00:17:04,852 Are you going to sacrifice them into the fire pit? 339 00:17:04,858 --> 00:17:07,146 - Do you think it's deep enough? - All right, that's it. 340 00:17:07,152 --> 00:17:08,862 I'm calling it, Joan Carpenter. 341 00:17:08,945 --> 00:17:11,155 This just went from Goosebumps to Saw 5. 342 00:17:13,867 --> 00:17:15,737 Billie? I’m coming! 343 00:17:15,827 --> 00:17:17,577 Hi-yah! 344 00:17:17,662 --> 00:17:19,292 God, what the hell, Maisy? 345 00:17:19,372 --> 00:17:20,752 Don’t even think about moving. 346 00:17:20,832 --> 00:17:22,672 MI-5 once tried to recruit me. 347 00:17:22,751 --> 00:17:25,671 - Oh, as if! - I know! Me, a public servant? 348 00:17:25,754 --> 00:17:27,594 - What a waste. - Maisy, please come on. 349 00:17:27,672 --> 00:17:29,209 I'm begging you here. Please let me go. 350 00:17:29,215 --> 00:17:30,835 You got to stop this. 351 00:17:30,925 --> 00:17:32,546 You don't think we had better things to do 352 00:17:32,552 --> 00:17:34,182 than play make-believe 353 00:17:34,262 --> 00:17:35,924 while you paper over your failures with Billie? 354 00:17:35,930 --> 00:17:37,718 Of course we did, but we're here because of you. 355 00:17:37,724 --> 00:17:39,344 - I just wanted it to be fun. - Mission accomplished. 356 00:17:39,350 --> 00:17:41,190 I'm having a blast. 357 00:17:41,269 --> 00:17:42,639 I'm going to need some bungee cords. 358 00:17:42,645 --> 00:17:43,854 The Dalai Drama’s gone rogue. 359 00:17:43,897 --> 00:17:45,357 Well, the joke's on you 360 00:17:45,440 --> 00:17:46,977 because I'm putting that on a T-shirt. 361 00:17:46,983 --> 00:17:48,613 Oh, God, 362 00:17:48,693 --> 00:17:50,903 why do you taste like lavender? 363 00:17:50,987 --> 00:17:52,277 Riley, please. 364 00:17:52,363 --> 00:17:53,953 I know we're in this 365 00:17:54,032 --> 00:17:56,202 not-talking-cause-Justin's-hot garbage phase, 366 00:17:56,284 --> 00:17:57,794 but would you please untie me? 367 00:17:58,745 --> 00:18:00,035 Riley, come on. 368 00:18:00,121 --> 00:18:01,621 Billie's probably really scared. 369 00:18:02,749 --> 00:18:05,039 - That's what you wanted. - That is not what I wanted. 370 00:18:05,126 --> 00:18:06,796 I was trying to do something special 371 00:18:06,878 --> 00:18:08,758 so that she’d come back next year. 372 00:18:08,838 --> 00:18:10,628 In my prank, you got to be the hero. 373 00:18:10,715 --> 00:18:12,505 You got to save the kids. 374 00:18:12,592 --> 00:18:14,630 In Maisy’s, you get nailed in the leg with an arrow. 375 00:18:14,636 --> 00:18:16,046 Why are you helping her? 376 00:18:17,222 --> 00:18:19,022 You pimped me out... 377 00:18:20,391 --> 00:18:21,521 to Gil the Thrill. 378 00:18:24,145 --> 00:18:25,395 I know. 379 00:18:27,190 --> 00:18:28,400 I know I did that. 380 00:18:33,988 --> 00:18:35,028 Riley... 381 00:18:37,242 --> 00:18:39,492 having Billie again, Maisy getting the cottage, 382 00:18:39,577 --> 00:18:42,747 this chance that I got to get back everything that I lost? 383 00:18:45,124 --> 00:18:46,754 I just went crazy, I went... 384 00:18:48,044 --> 00:18:50,094 really crazy and you got caught in the middle. 385 00:18:56,094 --> 00:18:57,144 I'm sorry. 386 00:19:01,558 --> 00:19:02,728 I’m really sorry. 387 00:19:05,895 --> 00:19:07,605 Please don't help Maisy win. 388 00:19:17,657 --> 00:19:18,947 I never did this... 389 00:19:19,993 --> 00:19:21,163 for Maisy. 390 00:19:51,733 --> 00:19:54,823 Bondage, threesomes... 391 00:19:54,903 --> 00:19:56,533 I think you're going to need 392 00:19:56,613 --> 00:19:58,703 to update your profile, there, Tindersnake. 393 00:20:01,326 --> 00:20:02,946 Cabin in the fucking woods! 394 00:20:03,036 --> 00:20:05,116 - Billie, wait! - Oh, Billie. 395 00:20:05,204 --> 00:20:07,874 Busted, busted, busted, busted, all of you! 396 00:20:07,957 --> 00:20:09,707 Ysiam is Maisy spelled backwards. 397 00:20:11,461 --> 00:20:14,091 Mom? Dad? 398 00:20:14,172 --> 00:20:17,052 We’ve been made. Stand down. 399 00:20:19,010 --> 00:20:21,140 Surprise. 400 00:20:21,930 --> 00:20:23,140 Whoa. What the fuck? 401 00:20:29,145 --> 00:20:31,305 - Are you serious? - What the fuck, Boomers? 402 00:20:31,397 --> 00:20:33,267 - Hey, girls. - It’s not a prank! 403 00:20:33,358 --> 00:20:35,528 It’s torture! Oh, good, you’re all caught up. 404 00:20:49,248 --> 00:20:51,458 That was pretty low using your evil genius 405 00:20:51,542 --> 00:20:53,002 against your older brother. 406 00:20:53,086 --> 00:20:54,746 I think you mean 'thank you.' 407 00:20:54,837 --> 00:20:56,757 For scaring the shit out of me? 408 00:20:56,839 --> 00:20:59,879 For dragging your mopey ass romance into the second act. 409 00:21:00,885 --> 00:21:02,675 I was waiting for the perfect moment. 410 00:21:02,762 --> 00:21:05,312 Did you or did you not get your first kiss with Billie? 411 00:21:06,516 --> 00:21:07,556 Yes. 412 00:21:08,643 --> 00:21:09,693 You're welcome. 413 00:21:12,772 --> 00:21:14,482 Wow. 414 00:21:14,565 --> 00:21:16,225 And that, twisted sisters, 415 00:21:16,317 --> 00:21:18,237 is why you should never steal my weed. 416 00:21:18,319 --> 00:21:19,399 - Sorry. - Okay. 417 00:21:19,487 --> 00:21:21,027 Won't happen again. 418 00:21:21,114 --> 00:21:22,874 We need to tell mom that Justin and Maisy 419 00:21:22,949 --> 00:21:24,369 are the witches’ bitches. 420 00:21:25,118 --> 00:21:27,538 It... it was fake, Keri. 421 00:21:27,620 --> 00:21:28,710 All of it. 422 00:21:29,956 --> 00:21:31,916 How high up does this thing go? 423 00:21:33,710 --> 00:21:35,000 You have no idea. 424 00:21:41,342 --> 00:21:42,676 What is wrong with you? 425 00:21:42,719 --> 00:21:43,928 What's wrong with all of you? 426 00:21:43,970 --> 00:21:45,220 You people are insane. 427 00:21:45,304 --> 00:21:47,434 In what universe did you think 428 00:21:47,515 --> 00:21:49,136 - this would be okay? - I’m sorry. I’m sorry. 429 00:21:49,142 --> 00:21:50,512 Do you think abuse is funny? 430 00:21:50,518 --> 00:21:53,268 Do you? I mean, unbelievable. 431 00:21:53,354 --> 00:21:56,234 Absolutely unbelievable. I almost jumped off the deck. 432 00:21:56,315 --> 00:21:58,315 My parents are going to freak, Justin. 433 00:21:58,401 --> 00:22:00,068 And I thought Olive was dead. Keri, too. 434 00:22:00,111 --> 00:22:01,398 I was legitimately fucking scared. 435 00:22:01,404 --> 00:22:04,074 - I know, I'm sorry. - Good. 436 00:22:04,782 --> 00:22:06,332 Because remember, the body count 437 00:22:06,409 --> 00:22:07,829 is always higher in the sequel. 438 00:22:10,038 --> 00:22:11,498 The sequel? 439 00:22:11,581 --> 00:22:14,131 Oh, yeah, you’re a dead man next year. 440 00:22:14,208 --> 00:22:16,838 You are a good little actress. 441 00:22:16,919 --> 00:22:19,669 I felt terrible. 442 00:22:25,219 --> 00:22:27,179 Maureen, hi, do you have a second? 443 00:22:28,222 --> 00:22:31,142 Has it been 20 years since I called you by your real name? 444 00:22:31,225 --> 00:22:33,135 No, I want to float something by you. 445 00:22:33,227 --> 00:22:34,647 I am sorry. 446 00:22:35,354 --> 00:22:36,854 I'm sorry that I left you with Maisy 447 00:22:36,898 --> 00:22:39,228 when I was off getting off. 448 00:22:39,317 --> 00:22:41,937 Riley said you got tied to a tree for me, so... 449 00:22:42,820 --> 00:22:43,910 say we’re even. 450 00:22:45,948 --> 00:22:48,198 - And I heard you calling me. - Yeah. 451 00:22:48,284 --> 00:22:49,946 I'd be dead because you were beyond late. 452 00:22:49,952 --> 00:22:51,452 Right. 453 00:22:51,537 --> 00:22:52,867 You came for me. 454 00:22:54,082 --> 00:22:56,292 Of course I did. 455 00:23:01,756 --> 00:23:03,506 See, it’s not just about the crossbow 456 00:23:03,591 --> 00:23:04,721 or the roof, Wayne. 457 00:23:05,551 --> 00:23:07,851 It’s you campaigning for Boathouse president 458 00:23:07,929 --> 00:23:09,639 after I was humiliated. 459 00:23:10,389 --> 00:23:12,639 It’s you obsessing about Teesa. 460 00:23:14,143 --> 00:23:17,733 It’s not sharing the Astral Nebula. 461 00:23:17,814 --> 00:23:19,274 I think I have a concussion. 462 00:23:19,357 --> 00:23:21,777 See, it's always about you. 463 00:23:33,871 --> 00:23:36,291 Hey. 464 00:23:37,959 --> 00:23:39,129 Can I come in? 465 00:23:39,836 --> 00:23:41,456 So you can tie me up again? 466 00:23:41,546 --> 00:23:43,586 So I can apologize. 467 00:23:43,673 --> 00:23:45,593 I might have gotten a bit too method today. 468 00:23:45,675 --> 00:23:47,835 Psycho, the word you're looking for is psycho. 469 00:23:47,927 --> 00:23:49,507 Well, it was good for the role. 470 00:23:49,595 --> 00:23:51,345 But I am sorry about tying you up. 471 00:23:51,430 --> 00:23:54,060 That was not cool. 472 00:23:54,142 --> 00:23:56,642 Well, your sociopathy aside, 473 00:23:56,727 --> 00:23:58,397 Prank Day was a huge hit. 474 00:23:59,147 --> 00:24:01,187 Billie wants to make it an annual tradition. 475 00:24:01,274 --> 00:24:02,484 Wonderful. 476 00:24:03,568 --> 00:24:04,858 You guys better start looking. 477 00:24:04,944 --> 00:24:06,654 Places go fast around here. 478 00:24:06,737 --> 00:24:08,358 Yeah, well, you know, we've actually grown kind of 479 00:24:08,364 --> 00:24:09,824 fond of this little hellhole, 480 00:24:09,907 --> 00:24:11,407 so I'm going to call Whoreen manana 481 00:24:11,492 --> 00:24:12,742 about renting it next summer. 482 00:24:13,452 --> 00:24:14,542 Oh, no. 483 00:24:15,454 --> 00:24:16,624 Whoreen’s selling. 484 00:24:17,248 --> 00:24:19,328 What? What the fuck. 485 00:24:19,417 --> 00:24:21,337 Oh, man. 486 00:24:21,419 --> 00:24:23,089 This place is cursed. 487 00:24:23,171 --> 00:24:25,631 Teesa’s Insta post got so much attention. 488 00:24:25,715 --> 00:24:27,375 And you and Billie are the first ones 489 00:24:27,466 --> 00:24:29,386 to rent it and not disappear or die. 490 00:24:29,468 --> 00:24:30,758 That's huge curb appeal. 491 00:24:33,014 --> 00:24:35,984 And I wonder who gave Whoreen the idea to sell. 492 00:24:37,143 --> 00:24:38,643 The lake’s changing. 493 00:24:38,728 --> 00:24:40,768 You can't stay stuck in the past forever. 494 00:24:42,231 --> 00:24:43,861 But it was fun having you guys here. 495 00:24:44,650 --> 00:24:47,740 Killian and Opal are really going to miss their cousin. 496 00:24:52,283 --> 00:24:54,793 Great idea for Prank Day, by the way. 497 00:24:54,869 --> 00:24:56,079 Best one ever. 498 00:25:01,292 --> 00:25:03,842 She wins. Every time. 499 00:25:06,487 --> 00:25:09,940 - Synced & Corrected by Dragoniod - www.MY-SUBS.com 35452

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