All language subtitles for What.I.Like.About.You.2x10.The.Odd.Couple.HDTV

I'm telling you,
Vince walking in

right when you're about to tell
Henry you love him -- weird.

It was weird.

It's weird
every time I see Vince.

- Is it weird now?
- No. Why?

- Hey.
- Hey.

Hi.

Hey, can you guys
sit somewhere else?

Holly and I are kind of in
the middle of something weird.

Fine -- we've got
some weird stuff

to talk about, too.

Hey, man, you think
it would be weird

for a dog
to marry a bird?

So the thing is

Henry and I are so good
together when we're alone,

but when Vince is around,
it's really weird.

Must be really weird

when Henry and Vince
are in the same room.

It's the weirdest.

- Is it weird now?
- No. Why?

Hey.

Quit doing that.

How's it going?

- Not good.
- Why? What's the matter?

- I just got into a huge fight with my dad.
- What about?

I tell him that I'm thinking,
just thinking,

about going to Columbia instead
of his precious Princeton,

and he freaks.

Whoa, when did
that happen?

I thought that you were
definitely going to Princeton.

I don't want
to be away from you,

and if my dad can't handle
me going to Columbia,

it's too damn bad,
and that's what I told him.

Wow, you said that
to your Dad?

Yeah, and he gave me that

"As long as you live
under my roof" crap,

so you know what? I'm not
living under his roof.

So then where
are you going to live?

I don't care.
I'll find a place.

I'm not going
back there.

You can crash with me
until you find something.

No, he can't.

I...I just mean that --
don't you have a roommate?

He's in L.A.
for three weeks.

Yeah, but he could
come back unexpectedly.

I mean, come on,
it's L.A.

Their governor is
a robot from the future.

Or, you know,
he could love it.

How perfect is this?

It's quite a situation.

Now come on.
Let's go get you a key made

- and head on over.
- Okay, yeah.

I'll call you later.

Okay. Bye.

♪ We going
to get some keys made ♪

♪ We going
to get some keys made ♪

♪ You really know
how to dance ♪

♪ When you go up, down,
jump around ♪

♪ Talk about true romance ♪

♪ Yeah ♪

♪ Keep on whispering
in my ear ♪

♪ Tell me all the things
that I wanna hear ♪

♪ 'Cause it's true ♪
♪ What I like ♪

♪ That's what I like about you ♪
♪ What I like ♪

♪ That's what I like about you ♪
♪ What I like about you ♪

♪ That's what I like about you ♪
♪ What I like about you ♪

♪ That's what I like about you ♪
♪ What I like about you ♪

♪ That's what I like about you ♪

♪ What I like about you ♪

♪ That's what I like about ♪
♪ Hey ♪

♪ Uh-huh ♪

♪ Uh-huh ♪

♪ That's what I like about you ♪

Sync by chocomoon
www.addic7ed.com

So now Henry and his dad
are in such a huge fight

that he moved out,

and guess who he's
staying with -- Vince.

- That sucks.
- Get out.

Yeah, I know,
and now they're making

this big dinner
for everybody tonight,

and how uncomfortable
is that going to be?

- You must feel horrible.
- I do.

No, I mean Val.

Yeah, your sister's
got two boyfriends,

and you have none.

And do you want to know
why you have none?

Because you won't admit

that you and Peter
are supposed to be together.

Yuck.

Okay, Holly,
will you tell her?

- Yeah, well --
- What are the odds?

He shows up in the same city
in the same hotel

in the room
right next door to you.

It was coincidence.

It was fate.

Will you tell her, Holly?

Yeah, I --

You and Peter are just
so meant to be together.

Otherwise, you would not
have kissed him, right?

Right. Ha!

Okay, I did not kiss him.
He kissed me.

For 14 seconds?

Confidential.

[ knock on door ]

Hi.

Hey.

Ow!

That was
really nice of you,

letting Henry
crash with you.

He's a good guy.

Yeah, you know, he is
a good guy.

He's a good boyfriend,
he's a good person.

He's really fantastic
at everything.

This box is heavy.

Sorry. Go ahead.

What is it?

It's for Val.

Ooh, for me? From who?

Here's the card.

It's from Peter.

[ gasps ]
Ow.

"I hope you enjoyed Chicago
as much as I did."

Mm.

Oh, Chicago-style
pizza.

Kielbasa?

A Cubs baseball cap?

Oh, that is the most
romantic thing I've ever seen.

Kielbasa.

Hey, I'm heading
back there.

Anything you want me
to tell Peter?

Oh, no. Just tell him
I said thank you.

Any --
anything else?

No, unh-unh.
Just thank you.

That's it?

That's all I get --
"thank you"?

You were standing out there
waiting to see what I would say?

Yeah.

Yeah, and I got to tell you,
I'm a little disappointed.

I mean, I was really hoping
for something like

"Oh, he's so sweet"

or "How thoughtful"

or "I can't wait
to kiss him again."

Ow. Seriously,
don't do that again.

Okay, that kiss -- it was
an accident, all right?

It was not supposed to happen,
so just forget about it.

You loved it.
I bet you came back here

and told those two
all about it.

I did not.

You two kissed?

And it lasted
14 seconds?

I just don't understand why
you kicked Peter to the curb.

Stapler, please.

Just tell me why.

Because I need to put these
two pieces of paper together

in a permanent-type fashion.

But he likes you
so much,

and I know
you like him.

Yes, I do.
I like him a lot, okay?

And that is the problem.
Now give me the damn stapler.

What is the problem?

When we were in Chicago,

he told me to my face
how much he hates commitment.

That is exactly
what I went through with Jeff.

Why would I
do that again?

Because you haven't
had sex in a year.

Hi.

Wow. Who are you
dressing for --

your boyfriend
or your boyfriend?

Shut up!
Henry is my boyfriend.

Hmm, Val doesn't
have a boyfriend.

Shut up!

Hey, Holly,
do you believe

- Val running into Peter in Chicago was fate?
- Yeah.

Okay, do you believe
Val kissing Peter was fate?

No, that was her not having
had sex for a year. Night.

So you're telling me

that you don't believe
in fate, ever.

No. Mnh-mnh.
No fate.

Okay, come here.

Then how do you
explain this?

That is
a speed-dating web site.

Exactly.

You were supposed to be
making me a spreadsheet.

Which is fate.

If you had hired someone who
knew how to do a spreadsheet,

she never would have
found this web site.

It's fate.

You don't know
how to make a spreadsheet?

I don't even know
what it is.

But may I remind you
that you hired me

because I'm pushy,
I don't take crap from clients,

and I'm a people person.

That's true.

Okay, look, you don't
have to go out with Peter,

but you got
to meet someone.

Not like that.
That is so not me.

Okay, fine.

But if you don't go,
I don't go.

Eventually,
Holly will move out.

I'll take her room,

and then it's you and me
together

now and every New Year's Eve.

I'll get our coats.

[ knock on door ]

[ Gary ]: Coming.

- Hi.
- Hey.

Oh, cool place.

We brought cake.

Oh, what smells
so good?

That's Vince's tortellini.

Why don't you two sit down,

and I'll get you
something to drink.

Yeah, here,
let me take your coats.

Holly. Tina.

- Thank you.
- You're welcome.

You doing okay?

Yeah, I'm fine.

I'm actually doing
a lot better than I thought.

[ Tina ]: How about now?

I've had a setback.

Hey, girls.

- Hey.
- Hi.

You paint?

Yeah, I fool around
with it.

It kind of
helps me relax.

How's, uh,
how's my tortellini?

Oh, it smells great.
Is it done yet?

Let's see.

Got it?

Here, Tina,
try this.

Mmm. That's amazing.

All right. Holly?

Oh. Ha ha.
I'll just --

Oh! Aah!

Okay.

Hey, Tina,
look at that huge TV.

Let's go see
if it's bigger than you.

I have to get Henry
and get out of here.

This is
way too uncomfortable.

I know. Look at him.

He looks unbelievable
in that shirt.

And now you find out
he cooks, he paints --

how sexy is that?

This is helpful.

Look, I need to be alone
with Henry right now.

Um, I'll come back
and pick you up later, okay?

Oh, who plays guitar?

Oh, I do.

Oh, I got to go.

No, no, unh-unh.

I'm not into, you know,
superficial stuff.

A guy doesn't
have to be tall,

doesn't have to
be all muscular,

doesn't have to
have a ton of hair.

Does he have to
have a personality?

[ bell dings ]

Okay, that's three minutes.

Gentlemen, please move
to another table.

I hate you.

Do you hate me now?

Hi, little guy.

Hi, I'm Val.

You have
an incredible body.

Look, I know we've been
instructed not to say

what we do
for a living,

but, uh, I just sold
a little pipe company,

and I'm worth
8,600,000 buckaroonies.

Ding.

Oops!

Time's up.

So what do you do
for fun?

I collect butterflies.

I'm a lesbian.

Making a getaway?

Oh, big time.

I'm right behind you.

Hey, did I
talk to you?

No, you definitely
didn't talk to me.

Isn't this the most
incredibly horrible thing

you've been through?

I know.
The whole process is stupid.

How can you even get to know
someone in three minutes?

I proposed to my wife
after six weeks,

but this is ridiculous.

You have a wife?

Because I think that
might be against the rules.

No, no. I...I lost my wife
two years ago,

which is the reason

my friend's been pushing me
to come to one of these things.

Oh, I'm sorry
about your wife.

Thanks.

I don't usually drop that
on people so fast, but I'm still

in that "spill your guts
in three minutes" rhythm.

Yeah.

I went out
with a guy for a year,

he told me
he didn't want a commitment,

we broke up, I don't like
onions on my pizza.

Ding. Ha ha.

I'm Jack.

I'm Val.

It's really nice
to meet you.

You're the first normal person
I've met all night.

That one over there,
the Olympic skater?

Yeah, she's a little nuts.

Yeah.

Okay, let's check
how many responses I got.

Already? We just left
20 minutes ago.

Ha. There's a reason
it's called speed dating.

Those people are desperate.

Lauren, you're
one of those people.

I did not go there
to meet men.

I went there for you.
I really don't even care.

Oh, my God!
I got one! I got one!

I'm getting married!

Which one is it?

Russell.

Russell. Russell.

Oh, I remember.

He's the tall, red-headed guy
who's the sports fanatic.

You hate sports.

No, it's okay.
I'm going to change him.

Okay, let's see
if you're getting married.

Hey, how are you getting
into my e-mail?

You don't know
my password.

Ooh, your birthday.
I cracked the code.

Oh, my God!
You got one, too.

I did?

Oh, no, no.

It's not that short guy

with the curly hair
and the boogie, is it?

You know,
I wouldn't write him off.

It's probably gone
by now.

No, it's from Jack,

the guy you weren't
even supposed to meet.

Do you see what I'm saying
about fate?

Ooh, look,
he wants to meet you

tomorrow morning for coffee
at Dean & Deluca's.

Ooh, let's see that.
Oh, that is so sweet.

Aw, your first date
with your new boyfriend.

I...I don't know.

Oh, come on. This guy
will obviously commit, okay?

He was married,

and he didn't break it off.
She crapped out on him.

Ha ha ha ha.

Hey, where'd everybody go?

I don't know,

but it looks like
they saved us some cake.

Oh, yeah.

Hey, I'm sorry I made us
miss your dinner.

You worked so hard.

No, no, that was
a great idea you had.

I think we needed
to spend some time alone.

I mean, when was
the last time we did that?

It seems like there's
always somebody else around.

I know.

I like when we do this,
you know?

When it's just you and me,
everything's, like...

Like what?

It's just better.

[ girl giggling ]

[ Vince laughing ]

Sounds like Vince
has some company.

Oh, my God.

What?

Tina's bag.

Vince and Tina
hooked up?

That's awesome.

Isn't that awesome?

Hey.

Hey.

Ooh, I love
your new desk.

Really? Want to make out
with it?

Ha ha. What?

I just know how much you like
making out with everything,

regardless of how it makes
your friends feel.

What are you
talking about?

- You and Vince?
- What?

Henry and I came back,
and we heard you guys.

You know,

it's like my friendship
means nothing to you.

Are you insane?

- How would you like it if I did that to you?
- Did what?

Whatever you and Vince
were doing in his bedroom.

- We were painting.
- Huh?

He was showing me how to paint.
What is wrong with you?

- You were just painting?
- Yes!

Yeah, that's what
I told Henry.

Hey, you hungry?

No, no, no,
get back here.

You -- you thought
I was with Vince?

Yeah, I'm sorry. I was wrong.
It's no biggie.

Oh, no, it's a hugie.
I mean, first of all,

I would never do something
like that to you.

And second of all,
don't you think

it's a little weird that
you're getting all freaked out

about me and a guy
who is not even your boyfriend?

Okay, I said I'm sorry.
It's over.

No, you see,
it's not over,

and it's not going
to be over

until you get
your act together

and figure out
what the hell it is you want.

Ugh.

I got stood up.

What? That is not possible.
He loves you.

Yeah, apparently,
not so much.

Okay, well,
maybe he left you an e-mail.

Your sister's insane!

Yeah, well, I haven't
had sex in a year!

Nothing. Damn.

You know,
something is wrong,

because you are
not the stood-up type.

I'll bet you've never been
stood up in your whole life,

have you?

No.

I hate you.

Okay, look, obviously,
something happened to him.

Maybe we should
check the hospitals.

I did.

- It's all falling apart.
- What?

My life.

Last night, Henry and I
left Vince's for a while,

and when we came back,

Tina and Vince
were in his bedroom,

and I accused her
of doing stuff with him.

Tina was with Vince?

Yeah,
but they were painting.

Each other?

No. Now, I have to
go meet Henry

and convince him
to move out of Vince's.

Otherwise,
my life is over.

Well, Holly, wait.

I have to go. Bye.

You know what? Maybe
I should go after her.

No, look,
she's got two boyfriends, okay?

You're too pretty
to be alone.

Look, I promise,
she's going to be fine, okay?

But we got to find Jack.
Where does he work?

I don't know. We only talked
for, like, 15 minutes.

Okay, well, what did he say?
He must have said something.

I don't know.

Uh, he likes kids,
he lives alone,

and he goes
to the batting cages.

- Let's go.
- Where?

The batting cages.

No, we are not going
to the batting cages. Unh-unh.

I'm not chasing after him.
Besides, there's, like,

a one in a million chance
he'll be there.

Well, that's right,

and if your
true love is there,

then you'll know
it was fate.

And if he's not?

They have bumper cars.

- Okay.
- Okay.

So I was thinking
about you and your dad

and how great
your relationship is.

Actually,
he's distant and unemotional.

Which is why you have to
work even harder.

So that's why I think

that you need to move
back home -- tonight.

What's going on?

Nothing, nothing.

I mean, if you want
to go to Columbia, fine.

If you want to go
to Princeton, fine,

but I think
that's a decision

you should make
at your parents' apartment.

Okay, you're obviously
not telling me something.

I don't know what it is,

but when you're ready
to tell me, call me.

At your parents' apartment?

Lauren, I'm leaving.

We have looked
in every batting cage.

No, but people
are coming and going.

Let's just make
one more round.

This is ridiculous.
I'm going -- wait a second.

I think that's him.
That could be him.

Oh, I knew it!

Wait, no, no, no.
I...I'm not positive.

Well, I am.

That man
whose butt looks

so magnificently tight
in those jeans

is your soul mate.

Now come on.
You go.

Wait, no, no.

He stood me up.
Maybe he doesn't want to see me.

Okay, listen,
did you ever think

that maybe you're
the first person

he's had feelings for
since his wife took a dirt nap?

And maybe
he's just so nervous

that it's
too much to handle.

Okay, I'm going in.

Okay,
you go get 'em, tiger.

Very firm.

Thanks.

Excuse me.

- Peter?
- Hey.

Holy crap!

What are you doing here?

What are you doing here?

Batting balls.

Huh, so you tracked me down
again, didn't you?

No, no, unh-unh.

I'm here to see
someone else.

This is just a weird
coincidence, is what it is.

It's a coincidence,
I tell you.

You know what?

I can't play these games
with you anymore.

Listen, Val,

I'm crazy about you,

and I think
you feel the same way.

I'm going to Italy
tomorrow morning.

I'll be back
at the end of the month.

And when I come back,
I'm going to call you,

and I'm going to ask

if we're worth
taking a shot.

Because I think we are.

Now get out of the cage.

These balls come through here
at about 85 miles an hour,

and I don't want
to lose you.

- Now can we go on the bumper cars?
- Yeah.

Hey, hey.

What took you so long? I thought
you were all perceptive.

Didn't you hear
the pain in my voice?

I ordered you
a turkey burger.

Great. What happened?

Okay, well,
Henry won't move out,

and he thinks that
something's going on with me,

because something is
going on with me,

and I don't know
what to do anymore.

Henry, Vince,
Henry, Vince -- aah!

Help me fix it.

Okay, calm down.
Listen to me, okay?

You're just...

going through a thing.

And it's hard.

Huh?

Yeah, I know.

Look, I feel
really bad for you,

but, um, maybe I'm not
the perfect person

to advise you right now,
because the truth is,

um...

I'm kind of screwed up
myself.

Aw, but what am I
going to do?

Okay, unfortunately,

you're going
to have to make a decision.

I mean, you cannot keep
stringing Henry along

if you're having
these feelings for Vince.

It's just not fair.

What?

I ordered you
a turkey burger.

Sync by chocomoon
www.addic7ed.com