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1
00:00:13,431 --> 00:00:15,219
Hey, hey, hey!
What do you think you're doing?
2
00:00:15,429 --> 00:00:18,094
Getting my fingers nice and pruney,
just the way I like them.
3
00:00:18,302 --> 00:00:23,251
No wife of mine is gonna
do dishes on Valentine's Day.
4
00:00:23,465 --> 00:00:25,170
You can do these tomorrow.
5
00:00:25,380 --> 00:00:26,576
Thanks so much.
6
00:00:26,795 --> 00:00:28,914
So if you have
no other plans this evening,
7
00:00:29,168 --> 00:00:30,790
could I interest you
in a nice dinner out,
8
00:00:31,000 --> 00:00:34,493
followed by a workout
on the heavy bag?
9
00:00:35,497 --> 00:00:37,118
Well, that depends.
10
00:00:37,329 --> 00:00:38,820
What restaurant you taking me to?
11
00:00:39,077 --> 00:00:40,983
Little place I like to call Manzi's.
12
00:00:41,242 --> 00:00:43,645
Manzi's? Doug, you did good.
13
00:00:43,907 --> 00:00:44,901
- I did, didn't I?
- Yeah.
14
00:00:45,114 --> 00:00:48,642
All right, so we're all set for a sweet
evening of sensuaI togetherness.
15
00:00:48,861 --> 00:00:50,021
Meet you there at 8.
16
00:00:50,734 --> 00:00:52,060
Meet me there? Why?
17
00:00:52,316 --> 00:00:53,310
It's Spence's birthday.
18
00:00:53,524 --> 00:00:54,850
Me and the guys gotta take him out
for a quick beer.
19
00:00:55,106 --> 00:00:56,135
Doug, it's Valentine's Day.
20
00:00:56,355 --> 00:00:57,977
I don't wanna meet you
at the restaurant.
21
00:00:58,187 --> 00:00:59,383
Why not? It'll be romantic.
22
00:00:59,686 --> 00:01:03,427
I'll walk in, it'll be like, "Hey. "
23
00:01:04,015 --> 00:01:05,590
Come on, Car,
I gotta do it for Spence.
24
00:01:05,806 --> 00:01:07,380
His birthday lands
on Valentine's Day.
25
00:01:07,596 --> 00:01:10,508
And he's Spence.
That's a rough combo.
26
00:01:10,760 --> 00:01:13,247
- All right, all right, I'll meet you there.
- All right, 8:00.
27
00:01:13,466 --> 00:01:15,704
And we'll party like it's 1999.
28
00:01:15,964 --> 00:01:18,202
Because it is. You get it?
29
00:01:20,669 --> 00:01:25,074
Hey, Hef, you gonna get dressed?
The dance starts in a half-hour.
30
00:01:25,332 --> 00:01:29,488
I'm not going. I got a fever.
Here, look at this.
31
00:01:29,870 --> 00:01:31,823
A hundred and eleven.
32
00:01:32,035 --> 00:01:33,740
Wow, I should be in bed.
33
00:01:33,950 --> 00:01:36,401
Dad, what are you doing?
34
00:01:36,614 --> 00:01:39,645
Look, I just don't wanna go
to that stupid old-people's dance.
35
00:01:39,903 --> 00:01:42,568
Why not? It will be fun.
36
00:01:42,734 --> 00:01:44,889
There'll be a little bunch
of hotties there, huh?
37
00:01:45,149 --> 00:01:47,352
Hey, I've been
to these meat markets before.
38
00:01:47,564 --> 00:01:49,020
Those women are like vultures.
39
00:01:49,229 --> 00:01:51,218
If a man has a pulse
and a driver's licence,
40
00:01:51,436 --> 00:01:54,301
they're all over him
like he's Van Johnson.
41
00:01:55,557 --> 00:01:57,381
Dad, cards on the table.
42
00:01:57,931 --> 00:02:01,258
I want you out of the house
by the time Doug and I get home.
43
00:02:01,469 --> 00:02:05,081
I want that very, very much.
44
00:02:06,549 --> 00:02:10,077
So go put on some pants
and some Canoe, okay?
45
00:02:10,337 --> 00:02:11,331
- Don't I-?
- No.
46
00:02:11,545 --> 00:02:13,119
- But I-
- No buts.
47
00:02:13,335 --> 00:02:15,537
- Fine.
- See, isn't it nice to compromise?
48
00:02:20,246 --> 00:02:23,241
Hi, Mrs Olchin.
It's Doug Heffernan, Spence ready?
49
00:02:23,452 --> 00:02:24,648
He's not home.
50
00:02:24,867 --> 00:02:27,235
Why don't you boys
come on up and wait for him?
51
00:02:33,069 --> 00:02:35,520
Usually we just buzz and
he comes down, what's this all about?
52
00:02:35,775 --> 00:02:37,432
I don't know.
You guys ever been up there?
53
00:02:38,273 --> 00:02:40,807
- You?
- Once, when I was like 10.
54
00:02:41,021 --> 00:02:44,384
AII I remember is Jell-O and fear.
55
00:02:51,637 --> 00:02:55,675
Doug. Oh, it's been years.
56
00:02:55,926 --> 00:02:58,626
Look how you've filled out.
57
00:02:58,840 --> 00:03:00,213
Hi, Mrs Olchin.
58
00:03:02,004 --> 00:03:04,455
Come in- Oh, you must be Deacon.
59
00:03:04,669 --> 00:03:07,072
How'd you guess?
60
00:03:12,870 --> 00:03:16,943
And that must mean you're Richie,
the ladies' man.
61
00:03:17,200 --> 00:03:21,653
Well, don't try any slick moves on
this lady, because I've seen them all.
62
00:03:22,654 --> 00:03:23,897
Okay, sure.
63
00:03:25,236 --> 00:03:28,729
Oh, come in, come in.
64
00:03:28,983 --> 00:03:31,848
Sit, sit, sit. I'll get us some snacks.
65
00:03:32,979 --> 00:03:38,213
Look, a wonderfuI onion dip.
I made it with soup.
66
00:03:39,349 --> 00:03:40,889
Soup, really? That's just-
67
00:03:41,098 --> 00:03:42,673
Spence gonna be home soon?
68
00:03:42,930 --> 00:03:45,002
Any minute.
I sent him out to get me cigarettes.
69
00:03:45,219 --> 00:03:46,676
But the joke's on him.
70
00:03:46,885 --> 00:03:51,373
I've got five cartons
here at the house.
71
00:03:56,752 --> 00:03:58,540
Good one.
72
00:03:59,000 --> 00:04:01,155
Why did you do that?
73
00:04:01,415 --> 00:04:05,358
Because we're having
a surprise party for him, silly.
74
00:04:06,536 --> 00:04:08,608
Isn't it a grand idea?
75
00:04:08,867 --> 00:04:14,362
I tell you, boys,
this is gonna be a night to remember.
76
00:04:24,729 --> 00:04:26,221
Hi. Stoli rocks, please.
77
00:04:26,436 --> 00:04:28,260
- Coming up.
- Thanks.
78
00:04:42,673 --> 00:04:43,952
Can I help you?
79
00:04:45,047 --> 00:04:46,538
You smell good.
80
00:04:46,795 --> 00:04:47,824
Yeah, thanks.
81
00:04:48,252 --> 00:04:51,283
- You wanna smell me?
- Not so much.
82
00:04:51,541 --> 00:04:53,992
Suit yourself. I'm Tito.
83
00:04:54,206 --> 00:04:55,484
And you are?
84
00:04:55,788 --> 00:05:00,525
- Waiting for my husband.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa, Tito retreat-o.
85
00:05:01,117 --> 00:05:05,438
Just making small talk,
waiting for my date to arrive.
86
00:05:06,030 --> 00:05:07,900
Lucky gaI.
87
00:05:21,392 --> 00:05:22,718
Excuse me.
88
00:05:23,432 --> 00:05:26,097
Would you by any chance
like to dance?
89
00:05:26,305 --> 00:05:29,466
- No.
- But why?
90
00:05:29,719 --> 00:05:31,838
Because I'm married. Now scram.
91
00:05:33,549 --> 00:05:35,124
Creep.
92
00:05:35,756 --> 00:05:38,787
Ma, will you come on?
93
00:05:39,003 --> 00:05:40,164
Look at this place.
94
00:05:40,460 --> 00:05:42,663
Where did you bring me,
a nursing home?
95
00:05:42,917 --> 00:05:43,994
Forget it, I'm out of here.
96
00:05:44,207 --> 00:05:46,362
No, Ma, you have not been
on a date in years.
97
00:05:46,580 --> 00:05:48,321
Now, you are doing this.
98
00:05:48,537 --> 00:05:51,735
Now try to enjoy yourself, okay?
I'll pick you up at 10.
99
00:05:51,993 --> 00:05:56,149
Fourteen hours I was
in labour with you, very nice.
100
00:05:56,406 --> 00:05:57,483
Goodbye.
101
00:05:57,738 --> 00:06:00,769
- I'm not talking to anyone.
- I don't care.
102
00:06:17,889 --> 00:06:19,085
I'm married.
103
00:06:20,595 --> 00:06:23,377
Relax, buddy,
because you know what?
104
00:06:23,592 --> 00:06:25,249
I'm married too.
105
00:06:30,837 --> 00:06:33,702
My wife's in the hospitaI,
if you must know.
106
00:06:34,167 --> 00:06:38,158
Well, very nice of you
to be with her on Valentine's Day.
107
00:06:38,372 --> 00:06:40,657
Visiting hours ended at 7:00.
108
00:06:40,912 --> 00:06:43,907
All right, all right. Jeez.
109
00:06:47,240 --> 00:06:50,438
My husband's away on business,
in case you were wondering.
110
00:06:50,696 --> 00:06:52,152
I wasn't.
111
00:06:53,818 --> 00:06:55,358
So, what's wrong with your wife?
112
00:06:55,608 --> 00:07:00,262
Oh, they're doing a scan on her
with that scope thing, yeah.
113
00:07:00,480 --> 00:07:02,137
Maybe a probe too.
114
00:07:03,810 --> 00:07:05,136
Sounds serious.
115
00:07:05,392 --> 00:07:08,553
Oh, it's one thing
after another with her.
116
00:07:12,054 --> 00:07:14,622
So would you like
to get some punch?
117
00:07:15,259 --> 00:07:17,048
Guess there's no harm in that.
118
00:07:23,253 --> 00:07:25,656
Birthday, birthday, birthday,
birthday, birthday
119
00:07:25,917 --> 00:07:28,285
Birthday boy
120
00:07:32,204 --> 00:07:33,826
I don't like it here.
121
00:07:34,078 --> 00:07:36,943
Where the hell is Spence, anyway?
I just wanna do this and leave.
122
00:07:37,200 --> 00:07:39,733
At least your wife's out of town.
You don't have to be anywhere.
123
00:07:39,948 --> 00:07:42,399
I gotta meet Carrie
in a minute and a half.
124
00:07:42,612 --> 00:07:44,518
- I think I see him.
- Great, he's here.
125
00:07:44,736 --> 00:07:46,357
We'll say "surprise,"
throw down some punch,
126
00:07:46,568 --> 00:07:47,680
and get the hell out of here.
127
00:07:47,900 --> 00:07:50,849
He's coming!
Quick, let's all hide in the closet.
128
00:07:52,271 --> 00:07:54,723
Couldn't we just
stay here and crouch?
129
00:07:55,311 --> 00:07:59,799
Don't be a spoilsport.
Come on. Quick.
130
00:08:00,015 --> 00:08:01,720
Chop-chop!
131
00:08:01,930 --> 00:08:04,879
Go, room, make room for mommy.
132
00:08:05,094 --> 00:08:08,125
Oh, I think I've died
and gone to heaven.
133
00:08:09,050 --> 00:08:10,044
Mom!
134
00:08:10,632 --> 00:08:12,206
Mom!
135
00:08:12,422 --> 00:08:17,075
Mom, they didn't have 120s,
so I got 100s.
136
00:08:17,293 --> 00:08:18,701
Mom?
137
00:08:18,958 --> 00:08:20,580
Surprise!
138
00:08:22,289 --> 00:08:24,361
- Surprise. Hi.
- Hi.
139
00:08:26,785 --> 00:08:29,615
It's your birthday, Valentine
140
00:08:29,866 --> 00:08:31,441
- Mom-
- So eat some cake
141
00:08:31,698 --> 00:08:32,941
- Mom-
- And drink some wine
142
00:08:33,155 --> 00:08:34,149
- Mom-
- Celebrate-
143
00:08:34,363 --> 00:08:36,730
- Mom!
- Spencer, don't interrupt.
144
00:08:36,944 --> 00:08:37,938
- It's your birthday-
- Stop it!
145
00:08:38,235 --> 00:08:40,899
- I hate when you do things like this!
- Spencer!
146
00:08:41,066 --> 00:08:43,387
This is why I never have the guys over,
you always have to embarrass me.
147
00:08:43,605 --> 00:08:45,013
I hate you! I hate you!
148
00:08:45,937 --> 00:08:47,677
Go! Leave!
149
00:08:47,893 --> 00:08:52,180
Just like your father
and every other man in my life!
150
00:08:53,722 --> 00:08:56,587
Spence Olchin pees sitting down!
151
00:08:56,803 --> 00:08:58,342
Shut up, Mom!
152
00:08:59,509 --> 00:09:03,452
Well, at least you boys
haven't abandoned me,
153
00:09:03,964 --> 00:09:05,455
or I don't know what I'd do.
154
00:09:06,129 --> 00:09:09,787
Probably take a bottle of pills.
155
00:09:10,708 --> 00:09:13,787
Oh, but this isn't party talk, is it?
156
00:09:15,038 --> 00:09:17,951
So, all right.
157
00:09:18,161 --> 00:09:52,342
Who's gonna dance with me first?
158
00:09:52,378 --> 00:09:53,668
Hello?
159
00:09:53,882 --> 00:09:57,494
Doug, where are you? It's 8:15.
160
00:09:57,879 --> 00:09:59,915
I'm in hell.
161
00:10:00,169 --> 00:10:04,657
Okay, watch.
First, they put a little alcohoI on it.
162
00:10:05,331 --> 00:10:07,450
Watch out, baby Spence.
163
00:10:07,663 --> 00:10:11,488
You're about to lose
a piece of your tinkie.
164
00:10:12,409 --> 00:10:14,445
Look, Carrie, she's not stable.
165
00:10:14,657 --> 00:10:18,269
I can't just leave,
I have to finesse my way out of here.
166
00:10:18,487 --> 00:10:21,897
I'll be there very soon, I promise.
167
00:10:23,275 --> 00:10:25,478
Oh, dear God.
168
00:10:27,355 --> 00:10:29,344
I gotta go.
169
00:10:32,893 --> 00:10:37,925
Okay, you boys stay here, I'll go
mix us up some more happy juice.
170
00:10:38,138 --> 00:10:40,293
- You missed the movie.
- Yeah.
171
00:10:40,511 --> 00:10:42,465
- All right, I'm out of here.
- Yeah, let's do it.
172
00:10:42,676 --> 00:10:43,670
What?
173
00:10:43,884 --> 00:10:46,168
Come on.
This woman is very fragile.
174
00:10:46,382 --> 00:10:48,087
If we walk out now, she'll snap.
175
00:10:50,295 --> 00:10:52,000
Oh, that's me.
176
00:10:54,001 --> 00:10:56,665
A five-alarm fire in a hospitaI.
177
00:10:56,873 --> 00:10:59,241
- Yes!
- Lucky.
178
00:10:59,455 --> 00:11:02,652
Mrs Olchin, I have to go,
there's a big fire
179
00:11:02,869 --> 00:11:04,988
and they want me there,
since I'm a fireman
180
00:11:05,200 --> 00:11:06,940
to put the fire out and whatnot.
181
00:11:07,198 --> 00:11:11,817
Oh, okay, but you be carefuI,
and don't forget your goody bag.
182
00:11:13,443 --> 00:11:14,604
Got it.
183
00:11:16,732 --> 00:11:19,811
Have fun, losers.
184
00:11:24,559 --> 00:11:25,672
Oh, who am I kidding?
185
00:11:25,933 --> 00:11:30,386
My marriage is a loveless farce.
Has been from day one.
186
00:11:31,096 --> 00:11:34,838
Well, I'll tell you something,
I know exactly how you feeI.
187
00:11:35,093 --> 00:11:37,377
- Do you?
- Oh, yes.
188
00:11:37,591 --> 00:11:41,416
My husband and I
sleep in the same bed,
189
00:11:41,629 --> 00:11:43,204
but we're strangers.
190
00:11:45,501 --> 00:11:48,034
What can we do?
We took our sacred vows.
191
00:11:48,290 --> 00:11:50,079
- That we did.
- Although...
192
00:11:50,330 --> 00:11:51,573
Yes?
193
00:11:51,829 --> 00:11:54,316
Sometimes I wonder
what it would be like
194
00:11:54,535 --> 00:11:58,194
to forget those stupid vows...
195
00:11:58,449 --> 00:12:03,019
...and share a passionate embrace
with a beautifuI woman.
196
00:12:04,111 --> 00:12:06,100
Oh, my.
197
00:12:06,900 --> 00:12:08,273
Does my candour shock you?
198
00:12:09,440 --> 00:12:11,808
Yes, but go on.
199
00:12:12,729 --> 00:12:15,725
You think I could buy you
a dinner sometime?
200
00:12:16,018 --> 00:12:18,173
- Dinner?
- Just as friends, of course.
201
00:12:18,391 --> 00:12:19,931
Since we're both married.
202
00:12:20,681 --> 00:12:23,168
- To other people, of course.
- Of course.
203
00:12:26,385 --> 00:12:28,669
I know a quiet little caf�.
204
00:12:30,298 --> 00:12:32,169
Sounds wonderfuI. Where is it?
205
00:12:33,379 --> 00:12:38,163
On the ground floor
of the St. Argyle HoteI.
206
00:12:45,453 --> 00:12:47,028
What?
207
00:12:48,492 --> 00:12:50,280
Doug, are you kidding me?
208
00:12:50,532 --> 00:12:53,904
I just can't leave
untiI Spence gets home.
209
00:12:53,941 --> 00:12:56,391
No, he won't stay here alone.
210
00:12:56,652 --> 00:12:58,192
You know what?
I'm just gonna go home.
211
00:12:58,442 --> 00:13:01,888
No, no, no, stay there.
Listen, we can salvage this night.
212
00:13:02,148 --> 00:13:03,474
Just stay and eat dinner.
213
00:13:03,730 --> 00:13:05,518
I'll be there by dessert. I promise.
214
00:13:06,186 --> 00:13:08,140
Okay, fine, but just hurry.
215
00:13:08,393 --> 00:13:11,305
- Okay, I love you.
- Yeah, yeah.
216
00:13:12,764 --> 00:13:15,049
Did your "husband" get delayed?
217
00:13:15,262 --> 00:13:16,340
Yes.
218
00:13:16,553 --> 00:13:17,749
I gotta tell you, if I was him,
219
00:13:17,968 --> 00:13:20,041
there's no way I'd let a stallion like you
wait alone at some bar.
220
00:13:20,300 --> 00:13:23,497
A stallion is a male horse, you idiot.
221
00:13:23,756 --> 00:13:27,581
- Is there an Albert Blott here?
- Right here.
222
00:13:27,836 --> 00:13:29,871
That's my nickname.
223
00:13:30,625 --> 00:13:31,868
Hello?
224
00:13:32,082 --> 00:13:33,574
Hey, baby, what's keeping you?
225
00:13:34,330 --> 00:13:35,787
Excuse me,
I'm ready to be seated now.
226
00:13:35,996 --> 00:13:37,274
My husband's gonna meet me later.
227
00:13:37,619 --> 00:13:38,613
- Very good, ma'am.
- Okay.
228
00:13:39,576 --> 00:13:42,774
Well, would you wanna go out
another time?
229
00:13:43,781 --> 00:13:49,014
Oh, so the whole thing
was a big joke, huh?
230
00:13:49,776 --> 00:13:53,269
No, no, it was funny. I'm laughing.
231
00:13:54,398 --> 00:13:56,801
Well, bye.
232
00:14:09,386 --> 00:14:10,628
- Mrs Heffernan?
- Yeah.
233
00:14:10,843 --> 00:14:12,962
- Your table's ready.
- Okay, thank you.
234
00:14:13,216 --> 00:14:15,880
Tito, you're with me.
235
00:14:33,699 --> 00:14:35,570
Cut in.
236
00:14:35,948 --> 00:14:38,516
No.
237
00:14:43,525 --> 00:14:45,514
Please. Come on.
238
00:14:45,773 --> 00:14:47,928
Oh, Deac, you wanna cut in?
239
00:14:48,146 --> 00:14:51,840
- Okay, here you go.
- I'm just going to the bathroom.
240
00:14:58,513 --> 00:15:00,170
Whoa, you know what, Ronnie?
Listen...
241
00:15:00,386 --> 00:15:02,790
Whoa, looks like I need another
one of these apricot sours.
242
00:15:03,009 --> 00:15:04,963
Another one?
243
00:15:05,216 --> 00:15:07,963
- Somebody has a hollow leg.
- Yes.
244
00:15:08,213 --> 00:15:11,244
My leg is hollow.
245
00:15:18,455 --> 00:15:20,858
Hey, Deac, I think I have an idea.
246
00:15:21,078 --> 00:15:22,818
When she comes back out,
I'm gonna pretend
247
00:15:23,035 --> 00:15:25,107
like I'm having a bad reaction
to that onion dip.
248
00:15:25,325 --> 00:15:27,989
Which, by the way, I think I am.
249
00:15:28,197 --> 00:15:31,690
Then you offer to drive me
to the hospitaI and we're home free.
250
00:15:32,153 --> 00:15:33,941
You with me?
251
00:15:34,692 --> 00:15:36,100
Deacon?
252
00:15:38,314 --> 00:15:40,268
No!
253
00:15:54,426 --> 00:15:56,499
- Albert.
- Yeah?
254
00:15:56,758 --> 00:16:00,286
Could you not touch every
single piece of garlic bread?
255
00:16:00,546 --> 00:16:02,335
Oh, sorry.
256
00:16:02,586 --> 00:16:06,412
- That's mine.
- Oh, sorry.
257
00:16:07,000 --> 00:16:08,196
Oh, a photographer.
258
00:16:08,415 --> 00:16:09,907
Hey, over here.
259
00:16:10,122 --> 00:16:12,573
- Is it okay if I get a picture of us?
- Yeah, fine, fine.
260
00:16:12,787 --> 00:16:16,114
Great, this way I can tell the guys
at work I bagged you.
261
00:16:16,367 --> 00:16:18,605
That's it. Up.
262
00:16:18,907 --> 00:16:20,528
Get up! Get up!
263
00:16:22,945 --> 00:16:24,223
Sit over there.
264
00:16:28,982 --> 00:16:32,013
Albert, do you have any idea
265
00:16:32,229 --> 00:16:34,218
why that girI didn't wanna go out
with you tonight?
266
00:16:34,478 --> 00:16:38,171
- No.
- Because you act like a schmuck.
267
00:16:38,433 --> 00:16:43,666
Now, I'm taking a gamble that maybe,
just maybe deep down underneath,
268
00:16:43,887 --> 00:16:44,999
you're not a schmuck.
269
00:16:45,219 --> 00:16:47,752
So starting now,
you're gonna act normaI.
270
00:16:48,300 --> 00:16:50,751
Now, if you slip up once, I'm gone.
Do you understand?
271
00:16:51,131 --> 00:16:53,996
Good. Albert, look at my eyes,
not at my chest.
272
00:16:56,876 --> 00:17:00,535
Good. Now, talk.
273
00:17:00,790 --> 00:17:01,986
What should I talk about?
274
00:17:02,247 --> 00:17:03,952
Just tell me what you do for a living.
275
00:17:04,412 --> 00:17:05,785
I'm an assistant manager.
276
00:17:06,910 --> 00:17:07,904
At...?
277
00:17:08,325 --> 00:17:10,563
- Kinko's.
- Kinko's. Good.
278
00:17:10,782 --> 00:17:13,612
Now, as much as I may
regret saying this,
279
00:17:13,821 --> 00:17:15,976
tell me more about that.
280
00:17:20,524 --> 00:17:23,057
You realize, of course,
we're going to have to be very discreet.
281
00:17:23,272 --> 00:17:24,728
Of course.
282
00:17:24,937 --> 00:17:26,476
We must never call
each other at home.
283
00:17:26,727 --> 00:17:30,090
Right, and if we do,
we use funny voices.
284
00:17:30,308 --> 00:17:33,303
So you sure you can
make it every Wednesday?
285
00:17:33,555 --> 00:17:36,006
Oh, yes. My husband plays golf.
286
00:17:36,220 --> 00:17:39,417
- You?
- Never played.
287
00:17:39,675 --> 00:17:41,878
No, I meant, can you make it?
288
00:17:42,132 --> 00:17:45,541
Of course, every Wednesday,
my wife gets a high colonic.
289
00:17:45,795 --> 00:17:46,873
Good.
290
00:17:47,086 --> 00:17:50,828
So every Wednesday
at the St. Argyle, exactly 2 p. m.
291
00:17:51,041 --> 00:17:53,741
We'll have a drink at the bar first,
sitting side by side
292
00:17:53,956 --> 00:17:55,861
but never making
eye contact or speaking.
293
00:17:56,120 --> 00:17:58,572
Good. And then I'll leave first.
294
00:17:58,827 --> 00:18:00,946
Pay for your drink,
so no one suspects.
295
00:18:01,949 --> 00:18:03,773
And I'II...
296
00:18:03,989 --> 00:18:07,850
I'll wait for you up in the room.
297
00:18:08,111 --> 00:18:09,686
Perfect.
298
00:18:09,943 --> 00:18:13,279
Oh, this is so wrong.
299
00:18:13,315 --> 00:18:16,394
Look, we've lived
by their rules long enough.
300
00:18:16,604 --> 00:18:18,012
It's our day now.
301
00:18:18,311 --> 00:18:22,218
Yes. Let's live for us.
302
00:18:22,433 --> 00:18:24,884
Ma!
303
00:18:25,930 --> 00:18:28,381
So, Ma,
you met a fella after all, huh?
304
00:18:28,594 --> 00:18:29,624
Well, I just-
305
00:18:29,843 --> 00:18:33,621
Hi, Allison Finnegan.
You two make a very cute couple.
306
00:18:33,882 --> 00:18:35,373
See, Ma, this was good.
307
00:18:35,839 --> 00:18:38,206
Give him your number.
I'll wait in the car.
308
00:18:38,420 --> 00:18:40,823
She's lots of fun.
309
00:18:44,582 --> 00:18:46,617
Oh, listen, I'm sorry.
310
00:18:47,288 --> 00:18:51,444
I'm not really married.
I just said that I was to avoid talking.
311
00:18:51,659 --> 00:18:54,324
Then once I said it,
I had to stick with it.
312
00:18:55,573 --> 00:18:59,515
Actually, I'm not married either.
313
00:19:01,901 --> 00:19:04,434
I said I was
for the same reason you did.
314
00:19:07,230 --> 00:19:09,681
So I guess we're free to get together
anytime we want, huh?
315
00:19:10,061 --> 00:19:11,683
No need to go
sneaking around now.
316
00:19:11,935 --> 00:19:13,391
Nope. Not at all.
317
00:19:13,808 --> 00:19:16,804
- Well, so long.
- See you.
318
00:19:21,219 --> 00:19:23,919
So I'm thinking maybe next year,
I get a little more money saved,
319
00:19:24,133 --> 00:19:26,584
I may take some
college courses at night,
320
00:19:26,798 --> 00:19:28,834
you know,
try to make something of myself.
321
00:19:29,046 --> 00:19:31,449
That's great, Albert.
What are you interested in?
322
00:19:31,710 --> 00:19:33,415
Well, I really like animals.
323
00:19:33,667 --> 00:19:35,455
So you think maybe
you wanna be a vet?
324
00:19:35,666 --> 00:19:39,159
Well, I was thinking dog walker,
but the vet thing sounds good too.
325
00:19:39,871 --> 00:19:41,990
So, Albert, congratulations.
326
00:19:42,202 --> 00:19:44,867
You made it all the way
through dinner acting normaI.
327
00:19:45,116 --> 00:19:46,857
- Really?
- Yes.
328
00:19:47,115 --> 00:19:49,151
Actually, I had a decent time.
329
00:19:49,363 --> 00:19:50,854
And I feeI like I did a public service
330
00:19:51,070 --> 00:19:53,189
for any women who have to come
near you in the future.
331
00:19:53,443 --> 00:19:54,721
Thanks.
332
00:19:55,275 --> 00:19:57,145
Here's your check. Thank you.
333
00:19:57,939 --> 00:19:59,763
Don't worry, Al. I got it.
334
00:20:00,021 --> 00:20:04,058
Really? Hey, I appreciate that.
335
00:20:04,268 --> 00:20:06,257
Hey, she may be paying for dinner,
336
00:20:06,474 --> 00:20:09,304
but I'm gonna earn it later,
if you know what I mean.
337
00:20:10,304 --> 00:21:01,805
Couldn't make it to the finish line,
could you?
338
00:21:01,841 --> 00:21:04,635
Spencie? You home?
339
00:21:04,844 --> 00:21:06,668
Yeah.
340
00:21:07,300 --> 00:21:09,704
Come give Mommy a big kiss.
341
00:21:11,422 --> 00:21:12,997
I can't.
342
00:21:13,212 --> 00:21:19,038
I gotta go back out
and get some Star Trek stuff.
343
00:21:19,624 --> 00:21:21,862
Okay.
344
00:21:24,037 --> 00:21:27,649
Sorry about what I said before.
I love you.
345
00:21:27,909 --> 00:21:29,981
I love you too.
346
00:21:33,321 --> 00:21:36,187
By the way,
Doug stayed the longest.
347
00:21:43,022 --> 00:21:45,591
Happy Valentine's Day.
348
00:21:45,811 --> 00:21:49,056
Happy Valentine's Day to you too.
349
00:21:49,517 --> 00:21:51,884
You still wanna fooI around?
350
00:21:52,098 --> 00:21:54,419
I had a rough night.
351
00:21:54,637 --> 00:21:56,710
Could you just sing to me?
352
00:21:56,927 --> 00:21:58,881
Come here, baby.
353
00:22:03,339 --> 00:22:06,702
It's your birthday, Valentine
354
00:22:07,294 --> 00:22:09,283
That's not funny.
25629
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