Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:02,710 --> 00:00:04,370
* My eyesare gettin' weary*
2
00:00:04,420 --> 00:00:07,170
*My back is gettin' tight*
3
00:00:07,210 --> 00:00:09,000
*I'm sittin' herein traffic*
4
00:00:09,050 --> 00:00:12,220
*On the Queensboro Bridgetonight*
5
00:00:12,260 --> 00:00:17,550
*But I don't care,'cause all I want to do*
6
00:00:17,600 --> 00:00:21,390
*Is cash my check and driveright home to you*
7
00:00:23,060 --> 00:00:24,560
*'Cause, baby,all my life*
8
00:00:24,600 --> 00:00:28,690
*I will be drivin' hometo you*
9
00:00:33,900 --> 00:00:35,160
Hey, Lou.
10
00:00:35,200 --> 00:00:37,030
Hey, Carrie.
11
00:00:37,070 --> 00:00:39,200
Everything okay?
You seem a little down.
12
00:00:39,240 --> 00:00:42,370
Oh. Ah, it's just this,
uh, thing at work.
13
00:00:42,410 --> 00:00:44,000
They brought in
some consultant
14
00:00:44,040 --> 00:00:45,120
to evaluate all of us.
15
00:00:45,170 --> 00:00:46,880
I get my pounding tomorrow.
16
00:00:46,920 --> 00:00:48,250
I bet you're
gonna do great.
17
00:00:48,290 --> 00:00:50,460
Ohh. That's sweet.
18
00:00:50,500 --> 00:00:52,340
Thanks, Lou.
19
00:00:54,970 --> 00:00:56,090
Hey, babe.
20
00:00:56,130 --> 00:00:58,220
Hey. Come here,
come here, quick.
21
00:00:58,260 --> 00:00:59,720
Pick a card. Come on.
22
00:00:59,760 --> 00:01:01,970
Oh, no. Come on, honey.
I'm not in the mood.
23
00:01:02,020 --> 00:01:03,220
Not in the mood?
You sure you wanna
24
00:01:03,270 --> 00:01:05,390
use that one up
on a card trick?
25
00:01:06,980 --> 00:01:08,730
Fine.
26
00:01:08,770 --> 00:01:11,360
Aren't the cards supposed
to be facing down?
27
00:01:11,400 --> 00:01:12,820
Why, the little lady's
right,
28
00:01:12,860 --> 00:01:14,570
so let's turn 'em over.
29
00:01:14,610 --> 00:01:16,780
Oh! Who is this?
30
00:01:18,530 --> 00:01:19,990
That's you.
31
00:01:20,030 --> 00:01:23,370
Nope. It's 52 of me.
32
00:01:23,410 --> 00:01:25,080
I made 'em up special
for my Super Bowl party.
33
00:01:25,120 --> 00:01:26,080
Aren't they great?
34
00:01:26,120 --> 00:01:27,460
Mm-hmm.
35
00:01:27,500 --> 00:01:30,290
Hey, look what happens
when you flip through them.
36
00:01:30,340 --> 00:01:32,750
I don't move,
just like real life.
37
00:01:32,800 --> 00:01:35,720
Oh, please don't tell me
we're out of Advil.
38
00:01:35,760 --> 00:01:37,930
Yeah, I think we are.
Why? What's the matter with you?
39
00:01:37,970 --> 00:01:39,260
I'm getting a migraine.
40
00:01:39,300 --> 00:01:40,470
Oh, I'm sorry.
41
00:01:40,510 --> 00:01:41,890
Oh, it's this
freakin' evaluation
42
00:01:41,930 --> 00:01:43,180
at work tomorrow.
43
00:01:43,220 --> 00:01:44,640
You know, I'm gonna go
upstairs and lay down.
44
00:01:44,680 --> 00:01:46,390
Could you do me a favor
and bring me that heat wrap?
45
00:01:46,430 --> 00:01:47,810
You have to put it
in the microwave for,
46
00:01:47,850 --> 00:01:49,100
like, 3 minutes.
47
00:01:49,150 --> 00:01:51,440
Yes. I was gonna
nuke myself a Hot Pocket,
48
00:01:51,480 --> 00:01:54,190
but you go right
to the head of the line.
49
00:01:54,230 --> 00:01:55,690
Oh, uh, quick question
50
00:01:55,740 --> 00:01:58,030
vis-a-vismy Super Bowl
blowout.
51
00:01:58,070 --> 00:01:59,280
No, honey. I can't
focus on that right now--
52
00:01:59,320 --> 00:02:00,530
But just real quick.
53
00:02:00,570 --> 00:02:02,280
Since the living room TV
is being fixed,
54
00:02:02,330 --> 00:02:04,290
can I bring the big screen
in from the garage?
55
00:02:04,330 --> 00:02:05,450
-Doug!
-DOUG: I'm sorry.
56
00:02:05,500 --> 00:02:07,080
You head on up.
I'll see you in 3.
57
00:02:07,120 --> 00:02:08,870
Okay. Thanks.
58
00:02:09,710 --> 00:02:11,380
[SIGHS]
59
00:02:19,430 --> 00:02:21,300
[MICROWAVE CONTROLS BEEP]
60
00:02:21,340 --> 00:02:24,680
[MICROWAVE WHIRRING]
61
00:02:36,900 --> 00:02:38,610
Heh.
62
00:03:25,740 --> 00:03:26,870
Doug?
63
00:03:26,910 --> 00:03:28,540
Shh!
64
00:03:32,790 --> 00:03:34,250
What are you doing?!
65
00:03:35,460 --> 00:03:38,760
Oh, I--I guess it needs
another couple minutes.
66
00:03:40,090 --> 00:03:42,380
[**]
67
00:03:43,760 --> 00:03:45,930
Gentlemen, a little
Super Bowl party update.
68
00:03:45,970 --> 00:03:48,930
I'll be introducing
a few new recipes this year.
69
00:03:48,970 --> 00:03:50,270
Let's just say
I found a way
70
00:03:50,310 --> 00:03:53,230
that guacamole
can get you drunk.
71
00:03:53,270 --> 00:03:55,230
[ALL GRUNT IN AGREEMENT]
72
00:03:55,270 --> 00:03:59,480
Talkin' about
a guaca-tini! Hello?
73
00:03:59,530 --> 00:04:00,650
Cool.
74
00:04:00,690 --> 00:04:03,660
Is there some sort
of problem, or...
75
00:04:05,700 --> 00:04:08,790
Well, thing is,
Barry, the new guy
from the loading dock...
76
00:04:08,830 --> 00:04:11,620
he's having a Super Bowl
party, too.
77
00:04:11,660 --> 00:04:14,460
Barry, from
the loading dock?
78
00:04:14,500 --> 00:04:15,920
He's a good guy.
79
00:04:15,960 --> 00:04:19,050
Yeah, he's a good guy
who looks over at me when I pee.
80
00:04:19,090 --> 00:04:20,630
Well, maybe he's, uh, never seen
81
00:04:20,670 --> 00:04:22,300
someone pee
while eatin' a sandwich.
82
00:04:22,340 --> 00:04:23,680
[LAUGHTER]
83
00:04:23,720 --> 00:04:25,220
The Super Bowl party's
my thing.
84
00:04:25,260 --> 00:04:27,600
Hey, who else offers you
a different theme
every year, huh?
85
00:04:27,640 --> 00:04:29,310
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Last year was, uh,
86
00:04:29,350 --> 00:04:32,600
"Bring your own meat,
bread and chair."
87
00:04:32,640 --> 00:04:33,940
Yeah.
88
00:04:33,980 --> 00:04:36,440
And then there was the year
you hired the stripper.
89
00:04:36,480 --> 00:04:38,770
He was great.
90
00:04:40,320 --> 00:04:43,320
How was I supposed to know.
His name was Sandy.
91
00:04:43,360 --> 00:04:45,360
You know what, you guys
are just threatened by a man
92
00:04:45,410 --> 00:04:46,990
who's comfortable
with his body.
93
00:04:47,030 --> 00:04:48,740
Whatever.
94
00:04:48,780 --> 00:04:51,290
Come on, it's gonna
be great this year.
95
00:04:51,330 --> 00:04:52,870
Any other issues?
96
00:04:52,910 --> 00:04:56,960
You never offer
any healthy alternatives.
97
00:04:57,000 --> 00:04:59,000
What's with you people?
98
00:04:59,880 --> 00:05:01,380
Deac, will you
tell these idiots
99
00:05:01,420 --> 00:05:03,590
they're coming
to my Super Bowl party?
100
00:05:03,630 --> 00:05:07,340
Yeah, um...
about that...
101
00:05:08,010 --> 00:05:09,050
You're bailing?!
102
00:05:09,100 --> 00:05:10,140
Well, I got my kids
this weekend.
103
00:05:10,180 --> 00:05:11,310
DOUG: So?
104
00:05:11,350 --> 00:05:12,810
So, Barry's gonna
have a petting zoo.
105
00:05:12,850 --> 00:05:14,350
A petting zoo.
Oh, that's a great idea, yeah.
106
00:05:14,390 --> 00:05:15,850
I hope you like
cutting your kid's finger
107
00:05:15,890 --> 00:05:17,480
out of
a llama's belly.
108
00:05:17,520 --> 00:05:18,810
And it's just one game.
109
00:05:18,860 --> 00:05:20,980
I mean, don't we watch
enough sports together?
110
00:05:21,020 --> 00:05:23,440
The Super Bowl party
is my annual thing, man.
111
00:05:23,490 --> 00:05:24,820
It's tradition!
112
00:05:24,860 --> 00:05:26,910
Guy, you've had it
like 3 of the last 8 years.
113
00:05:26,950 --> 00:05:28,370
Okay, so I haven't
had it every year,
114
00:05:28,410 --> 00:05:29,530
but I've had it
more often than not.
115
00:05:29,570 --> 00:05:31,620
No, it's less often
than not.
116
00:05:31,660 --> 00:05:32,660
Look, I'll tell you what.
117
00:05:32,700 --> 00:05:33,830
If you can get
something together
118
00:05:33,870 --> 00:05:35,330
that's halfway
entertaining for my kids,
119
00:05:35,370 --> 00:05:36,410
then I'll show up.
120
00:05:36,460 --> 00:05:37,670
Thank you.
And I expect the same
121
00:05:37,710 --> 00:05:38,920
from all of you,
understand?
122
00:05:38,960 --> 00:05:39,960
[ALL GRUMBLE]
123
00:05:40,000 --> 00:05:42,000
Could at least
pick up a food platter?
124
00:05:42,050 --> 00:05:44,420
All right, you're outta control.
125
00:05:46,130 --> 00:05:48,130
[**]
126
00:05:48,180 --> 00:05:50,180
-Hey, Lou.
-Hey, Carrie.
127
00:05:50,220 --> 00:05:51,510
Oh, hey.
How was your evaluation?
128
00:05:51,550 --> 00:05:54,350
Oh, uh, it actually
got postponed to tomorrow,
129
00:05:54,390 --> 00:05:56,730
but that was
so sweet of you to ask.
130
00:05:56,770 --> 00:05:57,890
No problem.
131
00:06:02,860 --> 00:06:04,150
Hey, babe.
132
00:06:04,190 --> 00:06:05,570
Hey.
133
00:06:05,610 --> 00:06:06,950
How was your day?
134
00:06:06,990 --> 00:06:08,740
It was good.
135
00:06:09,780 --> 00:06:12,830
Yeah, my day
was pretty crazy, too.
136
00:06:12,870 --> 00:06:15,580
Yeah. So, got a little
dilemma here.
137
00:06:15,620 --> 00:06:18,160
I'm looking for the perfect
mozzarella stick for my party.
138
00:06:18,210 --> 00:06:21,920
Problem is, I like the cheese
from Fanelli's,
139
00:06:21,960 --> 00:06:24,670
but the breading from
Sorisi's Pizza.
140
00:06:24,710 --> 00:06:28,720
Well, the important thing
is not to panic.
141
00:06:29,430 --> 00:06:30,720
Wait, it gets worse.
142
00:06:30,760 --> 00:06:32,890
Best marinara dipping sauce?
Cooper's.
143
00:06:32,930 --> 00:06:34,810
It's crazy.
144
00:06:34,850 --> 00:06:37,680
Okay, well,
good luck with that.
145
00:06:37,730 --> 00:06:39,350
Guess I'll go
start dinner,
146
00:06:39,390 --> 00:06:41,190
unless you had anything else
you wanna say
147
00:06:41,230 --> 00:06:44,770
about your day or...
mine.
148
00:06:46,990 --> 00:06:48,490
No.
149
00:06:51,700 --> 00:06:53,990
I'm sorry,
you want a cheese stick?
150
00:06:54,030 --> 00:06:55,740
No.
151
00:06:55,790 --> 00:06:57,080
By the way,
if you're wondering
152
00:06:57,120 --> 00:06:59,580
how my evaluation
went today at work,
153
00:06:59,620 --> 00:07:01,460
you can just go next door
and ask Lou Ferrigno.
154
00:07:01,500 --> 00:07:04,590
You know what?
I was just gonna
ask you about that.
155
00:07:04,630 --> 00:07:06,050
Oh, yeah? When?
156
00:07:06,090 --> 00:07:09,340
After you work through
your big dipping sauce crisis?
157
00:07:09,380 --> 00:07:11,590
Okay, I forgot. Okay?
I'm sorry.
158
00:07:11,630 --> 00:07:14,260
Oh, that's funny because
Lou Ferrigno didn't forget.
159
00:07:14,300 --> 00:07:15,760
Apparently he cares
more about me
160
00:07:15,810 --> 00:07:17,850
than my own husband does.
Good to know.
161
00:07:17,890 --> 00:07:19,930
Oh, come on. Lou--
he has to be nice.
162
00:07:19,980 --> 00:07:21,190
He's a giant.
163
00:07:22,310 --> 00:07:23,730
If he wasn't nice,
164
00:07:23,770 --> 00:07:25,860
he'd have villagers coming
after him with torches.
165
00:07:25,900 --> 00:07:26,730
Oh, please.
166
00:07:26,780 --> 00:07:28,570
Just tell me
how it went.
167
00:07:28,610 --> 00:07:30,070
It got postponed.
168
00:07:30,110 --> 00:07:31,780
Postponed?
Then why are you yelling at me?
169
00:07:31,820 --> 00:07:34,120
Because you
didn't know that.
170
00:07:34,160 --> 00:07:36,490
Yeah, but I sensed it.
171
00:07:36,530 --> 00:07:38,500
You and I, we have
an unspoken bond.
172
00:07:38,540 --> 00:07:41,250
It's like we don't
even have to ask.
We just know.
173
00:07:41,290 --> 00:07:42,330
We're like twins.
174
00:07:42,370 --> 00:07:43,920
Yeah.
We're like twins.
175
00:07:43,960 --> 00:07:46,500
We should switch clothes
and try to fool people.
176
00:07:47,750 --> 00:07:49,960
Okay, it slipped my mind.
It happened this one time.
177
00:07:50,010 --> 00:07:51,840
This one time?
Okay, how about last night
178
00:07:51,880 --> 00:07:54,340
when it just slipped your mind
that I was upstairs
179
00:07:54,390 --> 00:07:56,510
with one of the worst
headaches I've had in my life,
180
00:07:56,550 --> 00:07:59,680
and you're down here
building a house of cards?
181
00:07:59,720 --> 00:08:02,600
Yeah, if you want
to bring up ancient history.
182
00:08:02,640 --> 00:08:04,690
Look, the point is...
183
00:08:04,730 --> 00:08:05,770
I love you. Come here.
184
00:08:05,810 --> 00:08:07,360
Oh, please,
please.
185
00:08:07,400 --> 00:08:09,030
I think you're blowing this way
out of proportion here!
186
00:08:09,070 --> 00:08:11,110
I don't think I am, Doug.
Uh, let me ask you a question.
187
00:08:11,150 --> 00:08:12,820
Do you think about me,
188
00:08:12,860 --> 00:08:14,450
you know, throughout your day,
when we're not together?
189
00:08:14,490 --> 00:08:15,660
Do you think about me
at all?
190
00:08:15,700 --> 00:08:16,990
Of course I do.
191
00:08:17,030 --> 00:08:20,000
Yeah? Like when?
What are your thoughts?
192
00:08:20,040 --> 00:08:21,120
That...
193
00:08:21,160 --> 00:08:22,160
you're...pretty.
194
00:08:22,210 --> 00:08:24,120
Okay.
195
00:08:24,170 --> 00:08:25,670
Oh, okay, and I guess all you do
is sit around all day
196
00:08:25,710 --> 00:08:27,290
just thinking
about me.
197
00:08:27,340 --> 00:08:28,840
No, I don't sit around all day
thinking about you, Doug,
198
00:08:28,880 --> 00:08:30,420
but I do think
about you a lot.
199
00:08:30,460 --> 00:08:31,670
Oh, really? Okay,
well, you know what,
200
00:08:31,720 --> 00:08:32,840
give me an example
of one of these times
201
00:08:32,880 --> 00:08:34,220
when you're
thinking of me.
202
00:08:34,260 --> 00:08:37,100
Go ahead. Take all the time
you need, toots.
203
00:08:38,470 --> 00:08:40,060
Okay. Well, you know
how you've been having
204
00:08:40,100 --> 00:08:42,520
all these dentist appointments
for your impacted molars?
205
00:08:42,560 --> 00:08:43,850
Yeah. What about them?
206
00:08:43,890 --> 00:08:45,020
Okay, well,
207
00:08:45,060 --> 00:08:46,600
when I know you're
sitting in that chair,
208
00:08:46,650 --> 00:08:48,110
I am thinking of you
because I know you're nervous,
209
00:08:48,150 --> 00:08:50,530
and I am hoping
that you are okay.
210
00:08:50,570 --> 00:08:52,070
Like you have one
at 2:00 tomorrow, right?
211
00:08:52,110 --> 00:08:54,860
I will be sitting at my desk
thinking about you
212
00:08:54,900 --> 00:08:59,620
because you're my husband
and I love you.
213
00:09:00,700 --> 00:09:03,620
[SCOFFS]
That's the best you got?
214
00:09:13,760 --> 00:09:14,760
Hey.
215
00:09:14,800 --> 00:09:16,260
Hey.
216
00:09:16,300 --> 00:09:18,470
All right, so talk to me about
this Super Bowl party, Doug.
217
00:09:18,510 --> 00:09:21,930
Huh? Oh, it's, uh,
it's coming right along.
218
00:09:21,970 --> 00:09:23,810
Really? 'Cause Barry
just announced
219
00:09:23,850 --> 00:09:25,100
he's getting
a Ben and Jerry's Cart,
220
00:09:25,140 --> 00:09:27,350
and my kids
got wind of it.
221
00:09:27,400 --> 00:09:28,770
You know what I think?
I think Barry's trying
222
00:09:28,810 --> 00:09:29,980
a little too hard
223
00:09:30,020 --> 00:09:32,320
to get children
to come to his house.
224
00:09:32,360 --> 00:09:34,110
Just tell me
what you got planned, all right?
225
00:09:34,150 --> 00:09:37,570
Well, unlike Barry,
I don't need showboat.
226
00:09:37,610 --> 00:09:41,790
Okay? Let's just say
it's gonna be pretty sweet.
227
00:09:41,830 --> 00:09:44,000
Ooh, yeah.
228
00:09:44,040 --> 00:09:45,620
I knew it.
You got nothing.
229
00:09:45,660 --> 00:09:47,790
You know what?
We're going to Barry's party.
230
00:09:47,830 --> 00:09:49,250
Okay, you wanna know
what we got?
231
00:09:49,290 --> 00:09:50,880
We got a haunted house
in the garage.
232
00:09:50,920 --> 00:09:52,960
There. Way to ruin
the surprise.
233
00:09:53,000 --> 00:09:54,210
A haunted house?
234
00:09:54,260 --> 00:09:56,010
Yeah, a haunted house,
with skeletons and a--
235
00:09:56,050 --> 00:09:58,470
a bowl full of eyeballs.
Very scary stuff.
236
00:09:58,510 --> 00:10:00,470
If I were you, I'd pack 'em
extra Underoos.
237
00:10:00,510 --> 00:10:02,310
All right,
I guess we'll come.
238
00:10:02,350 --> 00:10:04,430
Okay, are we done talking
about your precious offspring?
239
00:10:04,470 --> 00:10:05,770
'Cause, believe it or not,
I actually have
240
00:10:05,810 --> 00:10:06,770
other things on my mind.
241
00:10:06,810 --> 00:10:08,690
Oh, yeah?
Like what?
242
00:10:08,730 --> 00:10:11,480
[SIGHS] Last night,
Carrie and I had this big fight
243
00:10:11,520 --> 00:10:13,650
about how I forgot
to ask her about
244
00:10:13,690 --> 00:10:16,190
her evaluation at work,
and how she's always
245
00:10:16,240 --> 00:10:18,570
thinking about what's
going on in my life.
246
00:10:18,610 --> 00:10:19,860
She told you that?
247
00:10:19,910 --> 00:10:21,160
Yeah. Like when
I'm at the dentist,
248
00:10:21,200 --> 00:10:23,790
she said she's
feeling all bad for me.
249
00:10:23,830 --> 00:10:25,290
Sucker.
250
00:10:26,200 --> 00:10:27,580
What do you mean?
251
00:10:27,620 --> 00:10:29,670
Women love to talk about
how much they think about you.
252
00:10:29,710 --> 00:10:30,830
It's a big scam.
253
00:10:30,880 --> 00:10:32,290
You know what they're
really thinking about?
254
00:10:32,340 --> 00:10:33,420
What?
255
00:10:33,460 --> 00:10:34,420
Chick crap.
256
00:10:34,460 --> 00:10:37,050
You know, throw pillows
and lotions
257
00:10:37,090 --> 00:10:39,340
and private schools
and Lenny Kravitz
258
00:10:39,380 --> 00:10:40,840
and fat-free sour cream.
259
00:10:40,890 --> 00:10:44,140
But not you, babe.
Oh, no.
260
00:10:44,180 --> 00:10:45,520
All right. How much
should I discount
261
00:10:45,560 --> 00:10:46,850
what you're saying
262
00:10:46,890 --> 00:10:50,600
because you're coming off
a very bitter divorce?
263
00:10:50,650 --> 00:10:52,690
20%.
264
00:10:52,730 --> 00:10:54,110
Okay.
265
00:10:54,150 --> 00:10:56,570
But you know what?
You still make a point.
266
00:10:56,610 --> 00:10:57,740
Where you going?
267
00:10:57,780 --> 00:10:59,740
We'll just see how much
she thinks about me.
268
00:10:59,780 --> 00:11:01,740
[**]
269
00:11:04,280 --> 00:11:06,580
[ELEVATOR BELL DINGS]
270
00:11:08,620 --> 00:11:10,210
-WOMAN: You're kidding me.
-CARRIE: No.
271
00:11:10,250 --> 00:11:12,040
Ugh, he couldn't
be grosser.
272
00:11:12,080 --> 00:11:13,380
Oh, I know. I know.
273
00:11:13,420 --> 00:11:14,880
Then I'm desperately
trying to get away.
274
00:11:14,920 --> 00:11:17,210
DOUG:
Well, well, well...
275
00:11:18,630 --> 00:11:19,920
Excuse me one second.
276
00:11:19,970 --> 00:11:21,590
Doug, what are you
doing here?
277
00:11:21,630 --> 00:11:23,430
Well, I just thought
I'd pay you a little visit
278
00:11:23,470 --> 00:11:25,680
at 2:00 when I'm supposed
to be having
279
00:11:25,720 --> 00:11:27,640
my dentist
appointment.
280
00:11:27,680 --> 00:11:29,060
-What?
-Yeah, you know,
281
00:11:29,100 --> 00:11:32,690
when you said you were gonna be
thinking of me.
282
00:11:32,730 --> 00:11:33,610
Oh, my God.
283
00:11:33,650 --> 00:11:34,860
Yeah, I guess
laughing it up
284
00:11:34,900 --> 00:11:35,860
with your little
pajama party
285
00:11:35,900 --> 00:11:37,530
is how you feel
my pain.
286
00:11:37,570 --> 00:11:39,610
How touching.
287
00:11:40,610 --> 00:11:43,070
Okay, let me
get this straight.
288
00:11:43,110 --> 00:11:45,080
You actually
came down here
289
00:11:45,120 --> 00:11:48,040
to catch me
not thinking of you?
290
00:11:48,080 --> 00:11:49,580
That's right.
291
00:11:49,620 --> 00:11:51,250
What about
your dentist appointment?
292
00:11:51,290 --> 00:11:53,750
I canceled it.
293
00:11:53,790 --> 00:11:55,170
Good plan, Doug.
294
00:11:55,210 --> 00:11:56,880
Let another day's worth of food
get stuck in there
295
00:11:56,920 --> 00:12:00,010
because I can't get enough of
watching you work that thing
296
00:12:00,050 --> 00:12:02,130
with your tongue.
297
00:12:03,130 --> 00:12:05,180
Ah, you know, what?
298
00:12:05,220 --> 00:12:07,220
Don't try to make this
about my mouth, okay?
299
00:12:07,260 --> 00:12:08,470
This is about the fact
300
00:12:08,520 --> 00:12:10,350
that you are no better
than I am, sister.
301
00:12:10,390 --> 00:12:12,230
You know what you are?
You're a hypocrite.
302
00:12:12,270 --> 00:12:14,020
Hypocrite?
Pretty big word there.
303
00:12:14,060 --> 00:12:16,270
Yeah, I checked it.
It's right.
304
00:12:16,310 --> 00:12:17,360
All right, Doug.
You know what?
305
00:12:17,400 --> 00:12:18,730
Okay, you caught me.
You caught me.
306
00:12:18,780 --> 00:12:21,950
At exactly 2:00, no,
I was not thinking about you.
307
00:12:21,990 --> 00:12:23,150
Hmm!
308
00:12:23,200 --> 00:12:25,370
But at my lunch hour,
I did go and get you
309
00:12:25,410 --> 00:12:27,490
the Jackie Chan movie
you've been wanting to see
310
00:12:27,530 --> 00:12:30,200
because I knew you'd need
a little pick-me-up.
311
00:12:30,250 --> 00:12:33,370
-Shanghai Noon.
-Mm-hmm.
312
00:12:33,420 --> 00:12:36,250
He's in the old west
in this one.
313
00:12:36,290 --> 00:12:37,460
And then I went
by that deli
314
00:12:37,500 --> 00:12:38,750
and got you that soup
that you like
315
00:12:38,800 --> 00:12:40,380
because I knew
your mouth would hurt.
316
00:12:40,420 --> 00:12:41,590
If you don't believe me,
it's in the refrigerator
317
00:12:41,630 --> 00:12:42,380
over there.
318
00:12:42,420 --> 00:12:43,720
No,
I--I believe you.
319
00:12:43,760 --> 00:12:45,090
Yeah, you know what, Doug?
320
00:12:45,140 --> 00:12:46,720
If you put this much energy
into thinking about me
321
00:12:46,760 --> 00:12:50,310
once in a while that you put
into trying to catch me,
322
00:12:50,350 --> 00:12:52,310
you'd avoid
the kind of humiliation
323
00:12:52,350 --> 00:12:55,020
you're feeling right now.
324
00:12:55,060 --> 00:12:57,480
-Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
-CARRIE: Yeah.
325
00:12:57,520 --> 00:12:58,980
Well, I'm gonna get
back to work.
326
00:12:59,020 --> 00:13:00,980
I have my evaluation
at 5:00.
327
00:13:01,030 --> 00:13:03,110
-That's today?
-Yeah.
328
00:13:03,150 --> 00:13:05,160
Hey, good luck.
329
00:13:05,200 --> 00:13:07,280
[**]
330
00:13:08,700 --> 00:13:10,370
So I'm looking over
the supply orders
331
00:13:10,410 --> 00:13:11,450
for the past year,
332
00:13:11,490 --> 00:13:12,950
and I'm noticing
that your invoices
333
00:13:13,000 --> 00:13:14,080
are pretty high.
334
00:13:14,120 --> 00:13:15,750
Oh, well, what can
I tell ya?
335
00:13:15,790 --> 00:13:18,750
Highlighters, Post-Its,
they're my weakness.
336
00:13:18,790 --> 00:13:22,340
[CHUCKLES]
337
00:13:22,380 --> 00:13:25,050
I buy extras
so we don't run out.
338
00:13:25,090 --> 00:13:27,510
I see you haven't taken any
of the legal research seminars
339
00:13:27,550 --> 00:13:29,850
that the firm offers
on Saturday mornings.
340
00:13:29,890 --> 00:13:31,140
Well, no.
341
00:13:31,180 --> 00:13:32,770
I have not done that.
342
00:13:32,810 --> 00:13:34,100
[TELEPHONE RINGS]
343
00:13:34,140 --> 00:13:36,020
Hello?
344
00:13:36,060 --> 00:13:38,980
Could you hold on
a second?
345
00:13:39,020 --> 00:13:41,110
It's your husband.
346
00:13:41,150 --> 00:13:43,690
Could you tell him
I'll call him back?
347
00:13:43,740 --> 00:13:46,740
I'm sorry. She'll have
to call you back.
348
00:13:48,450 --> 00:13:50,910
He says he really needs
to talk to you.
349
00:13:52,200 --> 00:13:53,290
Thanks.
350
00:13:53,330 --> 00:13:55,120
[CLEARS THROAT]
351
00:13:55,160 --> 00:13:56,620
Hello? What's
going on, Doug?
352
00:13:56,670 --> 00:14:01,090
DOUG [SING-SONG]:
*I'm thinking of you*
353
00:14:01,130 --> 00:14:02,960
Okay, thank you.
354
00:14:03,000 --> 00:14:04,130
Gotta run.
355
00:14:04,170 --> 00:14:05,550
Wait, wait, wait, wait.
356
00:14:05,590 --> 00:14:08,510
Look, I just wanna say I'm sorry
about everything before,
357
00:14:08,550 --> 00:14:11,100
and I know you're gonna do
great on your evaluation.
358
00:14:11,140 --> 00:14:12,720
Hey, if you get nervous,
359
00:14:12,760 --> 00:14:16,810
just picture the guy
dressed up like a big baby.
360
00:14:19,980 --> 00:14:21,900
Actually, um, hon,
361
00:14:21,940 --> 00:14:24,980
I'm in my evaluation
right now.
362
00:14:25,030 --> 00:14:26,610
Oh, okay, well,
I'll let ya go.
363
00:14:26,650 --> 00:14:28,280
Knock 'em dead
and remember...
364
00:14:28,320 --> 00:14:32,370
[SING-SONG]
*I'm thinking of you*
365
00:14:32,410 --> 00:14:33,830
[TIRES SCREECH]
366
00:14:33,870 --> 00:14:36,290
-[CRASH]
-Doug?
367
00:14:46,170 --> 00:14:48,300
Carrie!
368
00:14:48,340 --> 00:14:49,720
Carrie!
369
00:14:49,760 --> 00:14:51,800
CARRIE: Coming!
370
00:14:51,850 --> 00:14:53,350
This thing's
giving me wet heat.
371
00:14:53,390 --> 00:14:56,560
The doctor said I'm supposed
to have dry heat.
372
00:14:56,600 --> 00:14:57,770
It is dry heat.
373
00:14:57,810 --> 00:15:00,440
You're sitting
on a juice box.
374
00:15:02,150 --> 00:15:03,440
Ow.
375
00:15:03,480 --> 00:15:05,110
Honey, why are you still trying
to have this party?
376
00:15:05,150 --> 00:15:06,990
I mean, you were
in a car accident.
377
00:15:07,030 --> 00:15:08,650
Why don't you just
call the guys and cancel?
378
00:15:08,700 --> 00:15:10,240
I can't. Then they'll
all go to Barry's.
379
00:15:10,280 --> 00:15:11,200
So?
380
00:15:11,240 --> 00:15:12,660
So he hosts
one successful party,
381
00:15:12,700 --> 00:15:13,990
I'm out of the picture
for good.
382
00:15:14,030 --> 00:15:17,500
The I.P.S. party scene
is very cutthroat.
383
00:15:17,540 --> 00:15:19,000
Look, just help me
out here, okay?
384
00:15:19,040 --> 00:15:20,290
You're doing
a beautiful job.
385
00:15:20,330 --> 00:15:23,000
Fine. Fine.
386
00:15:23,040 --> 00:15:24,670
Oh, oh.
387
00:15:24,710 --> 00:15:26,130
What?
388
00:15:26,170 --> 00:15:29,340
Nothing. It's just that those
Doritos, they're Cool Ranch.
389
00:15:29,380 --> 00:15:30,510
And...?
390
00:15:30,550 --> 00:15:33,470
And you already put out
Nacho Cheese.
391
00:15:33,510 --> 00:15:36,680
Well, remember? I feature
a different chip every quarter.
392
00:15:36,720 --> 00:15:38,980
We went over this.
393
00:15:40,810 --> 00:15:41,900
You know what?
Don't worry about it.
394
00:15:41,940 --> 00:15:42,900
It's fine, it's fine.
395
00:15:42,940 --> 00:15:44,150
That's right.
It is fine.
396
00:15:44,190 --> 00:15:46,440
All right, so,
I got everything--
397
00:15:46,480 --> 00:15:47,860
the chips, the ice,
398
00:15:47,900 --> 00:15:50,240
the sandwiches,
the subs.
399
00:15:50,280 --> 00:15:51,200
Anything else?
400
00:15:51,240 --> 00:15:53,200
Nope. Everything else
looks great.
401
00:15:53,240 --> 00:15:55,530
Now just zip
the big screen on in here,
402
00:15:55,580 --> 00:15:57,870
and we're good to go.
403
00:15:57,910 --> 00:15:59,870
What? By myself?
404
00:15:59,910 --> 00:16:02,120
The thing weighs, like,
1,000 pounds.
405
00:16:02,170 --> 00:16:04,290
It's on wheels. It's like
pushing a shopping cart.
406
00:16:04,330 --> 00:16:06,590
Doug, you have a bunch of guys
coming over here,
407
00:16:06,630 --> 00:16:08,590
one of whom
is Lou Ferrigno,
408
00:16:08,630 --> 00:16:11,050
the world's
strongest man.
409
00:16:11,090 --> 00:16:12,930
Excuse me.
Being strong is his job.
410
00:16:12,970 --> 00:16:14,010
You don't ask
a heart surgeon
411
00:16:14,050 --> 00:16:16,760
to open you up
on his day off.
412
00:16:19,390 --> 00:16:20,600
DOUG: What's happening?
413
00:16:20,640 --> 00:16:23,060
It's stuck.
It's too heavy.
414
00:16:23,100 --> 00:16:24,440
You know what?
You're not gonna move it
415
00:16:24,480 --> 00:16:25,520
like that.
416
00:16:25,560 --> 00:16:26,610
You gotta get lower.
417
00:16:26,650 --> 00:16:28,820
You gotta push
with your legs.
418
00:16:28,860 --> 00:16:29,940
Well, hello.
419
00:16:29,980 --> 00:16:31,280
I see somebody wore
their lucky
420
00:16:31,320 --> 00:16:33,950
Super Bowl thong.
421
00:16:33,990 --> 00:16:35,990
All right, you know
what'd help me move this TV?
422
00:16:36,030 --> 00:16:39,830
If you would shut
your Doritos chute.
423
00:16:39,870 --> 00:16:41,160
Hey, hey, hey, hey.
424
00:16:41,200 --> 00:16:42,580
Not sure why I'm catching
so much attitude.
425
00:16:42,620 --> 00:16:44,120
Remember,
I only hurt my back
426
00:16:44,170 --> 00:16:45,830
'cause I called to say
I was thinking of you.
427
00:16:45,880 --> 00:16:48,670
And once again, very sweet,
428
00:16:48,710 --> 00:16:49,880
but here's a little tip.
429
00:16:49,920 --> 00:16:53,130
Next time you think of me,
pull over.
430
00:16:53,170 --> 00:16:54,590
Oh! Are you kiddin'?
Are you trying to say
431
00:16:54,630 --> 00:16:56,010
all this is my fault?
432
00:16:56,050 --> 00:16:57,720
Oh, you know, so sorry
I was trying to put you
433
00:16:57,760 --> 00:16:59,100
in a good place
for your evaluation.
434
00:16:59,140 --> 00:17:00,850
Oh, yeah. Really put me
in a good place
435
00:17:00,890 --> 00:17:02,680
when I heard
the crunching of metal
436
00:17:02,730 --> 00:17:03,940
and the phone
going dead.
437
00:17:03,980 --> 00:17:05,440
Really, really took
the edge off.
438
00:17:05,480 --> 00:17:06,980
You know what,
none of this would have happened
439
00:17:07,020 --> 00:17:08,270
in the first place
if you hadn't freaked out
440
00:17:08,310 --> 00:17:10,530
'cause I don't
think about you 24-7.
441
00:17:10,570 --> 00:17:12,110
Oh, okay. I'm sorry.
442
00:17:12,150 --> 00:17:14,240
In the future,
I'll just go to Lou Ferrigno
443
00:17:14,280 --> 00:17:15,950
for all
my emotional needs.
444
00:17:15,990 --> 00:17:20,290
Oh, you just love your
Lou Ferrigno, don't ya?
445
00:17:20,330 --> 00:17:22,000
You know what?
Maybe when he comes over here,
446
00:17:22,040 --> 00:17:24,960
you guys can go off alone
and hold each other.
447
00:17:25,000 --> 00:17:27,170
"Oh, how was your day?"
"How was your day?"
448
00:17:27,210 --> 00:17:29,210
"Oh, they were mean
to me at work."
449
00:17:29,250 --> 00:17:31,800
"Somebody dropped
a dumbbell on my toe."
450
00:17:31,840 --> 00:17:33,800
Okay, that's it.
Have a great party. Good-bye.
451
00:17:33,840 --> 00:17:35,880
Wait, Car!
Where ya going?!
452
00:17:35,930 --> 00:17:38,430
-What about my TV?!
-[DOOR SLAMS]
453
00:17:38,470 --> 00:17:40,180
Ow.
454
00:17:41,470 --> 00:17:44,140
Aah!
455
00:17:44,180 --> 00:17:45,940
Oh, my--
456
00:17:48,190 --> 00:17:51,020
Ohh!
457
00:17:52,320 --> 00:17:54,240
[MUTTERING]
458
00:17:54,280 --> 00:17:55,570
Ohh!
459
00:17:55,610 --> 00:17:57,660
[STRAINING]
All right.
460
00:17:57,700 --> 00:17:59,160
Oh, my God.
461
00:18:00,830 --> 00:18:02,990
Ohh.
462
00:18:03,750 --> 00:18:05,370
Oh, God.
463
00:18:07,250 --> 00:18:09,080
Ugh.
464
00:18:11,210 --> 00:18:13,590
You didn't
unplug it!
465
00:18:18,800 --> 00:18:22,560
[SUPER BOWL PLAYING ON TV]
466
00:18:22,600 --> 00:18:24,060
What just happened?
467
00:18:24,100 --> 00:18:25,810
Well, the gray team
intercepted the ball
468
00:18:25,850 --> 00:18:29,230
from the slightly less
gray team.
469
00:18:29,270 --> 00:18:30,650
Come on.
It's black and white.
470
00:18:30,690 --> 00:18:32,520
We're kickin' it
old school.
471
00:18:32,570 --> 00:18:33,780
Oh, and by the way, guys,
472
00:18:33,820 --> 00:18:35,690
we're 3 minutes away
from a new chip coming out.
473
00:18:35,740 --> 00:18:39,780
Chip change! Chip change!
474
00:18:39,820 --> 00:18:40,950
Nice haunted house, man.
475
00:18:40,990 --> 00:18:42,370
I walk in,
and my kids are playing
476
00:18:42,410 --> 00:18:44,910
with jumper cables
and an open can of turpentine.
477
00:18:45,950 --> 00:18:47,290
I gotta tell ya,
sounds pretty scary to me.
478
00:18:47,330 --> 00:18:49,040
Yeah.
I'm going to Barry's.
479
00:18:49,080 --> 00:18:51,460
Oh, Deac, come on, man.
480
00:18:51,500 --> 00:18:53,420
Whoo, I thought
he'd never leave, huh?
481
00:18:53,460 --> 00:18:56,210
I mean, who brings kids
to a Super Bowl party?
482
00:18:56,260 --> 00:18:57,590
Loser!
483
00:18:59,930 --> 00:19:01,260
You know,
if we leave now,
484
00:19:01,300 --> 00:19:03,600
we can get to Barry's
by the second quarter.
485
00:19:03,640 --> 00:19:05,060
Let's go.
486
00:19:05,100 --> 00:19:07,310
We're going
to Barry's.
487
00:19:07,350 --> 00:19:08,770
Oh, oh, come on!
488
00:19:08,810 --> 00:19:10,850
See ya later, Doug.
489
00:19:10,900 --> 00:19:12,110
All right, fine.
Leave,
490
00:19:12,150 --> 00:19:13,860
but know this.
You walk out now,
491
00:19:13,900 --> 00:19:15,900
it's a lifetime ban,
my friends,
492
00:19:15,940 --> 00:19:19,450
and that includes
my Stanley Cup sleep-over.
493
00:19:29,460 --> 00:19:30,790
Just go!
494
00:19:30,830 --> 00:19:31,830
Are you sure?
495
00:19:31,880 --> 00:19:32,960
Yes.
496
00:19:33,000 --> 00:19:35,090
Feel better, buddy.
497
00:19:36,380 --> 00:19:39,720
Oh, by the way, how did
Carrie's evaluation go?
498
00:19:40,630 --> 00:19:42,430
It was fine.
499
00:19:42,470 --> 00:19:44,640
I'm glad.
500
00:19:50,350 --> 00:19:52,940
Hey, where did
everybody go?
501
00:19:52,980 --> 00:19:54,270
They left.
502
00:19:54,310 --> 00:19:56,940
If I could walk,
I'd go to Barry's, too.
503
00:19:56,980 --> 00:19:59,650
Oh, they didn't
stay long.
504
00:20:00,950 --> 00:20:02,950
They weren't shy
about eating, though.
505
00:20:02,990 --> 00:20:05,990
Oh, man, they ate
all the mini eggrolls.
506
00:20:06,030 --> 00:20:09,290
Actually,
there are 3 left.
507
00:20:10,120 --> 00:20:12,870
I know you like 'em,
so I...
508
00:20:12,920 --> 00:20:15,090
put 'em aside
for you.
509
00:20:15,130 --> 00:20:18,090
You did?
That was sweet.
510
00:20:18,130 --> 00:20:19,960
Where are they?
511
00:20:20,010 --> 00:20:22,630
I got 'em right here.
I've been keeping 'em--
512
00:20:24,550 --> 00:20:26,550
I've been keeping 'em warm
next to my body
513
00:20:26,600 --> 00:20:28,520
like a mother hen.
514
00:20:30,560 --> 00:20:32,480
Dipping sauce.
515
00:20:39,820 --> 00:20:42,820
You did save these
for me, right?
516
00:20:42,860 --> 00:20:44,490
Oh, yeah, yeah.
517
00:20:44,530 --> 00:20:48,330
I mean, I put 3 aside
'cause I couldn't quite remember
518
00:20:48,370 --> 00:20:50,160
exactly how many
you like to eat,
519
00:20:50,200 --> 00:20:54,290
whether it was three or one.
520
00:21:02,170 --> 00:21:03,260
I'm gonna
get a drink.
521
00:21:03,300 --> 00:21:04,720
Wait, don't bother.
522
00:21:04,760 --> 00:21:06,390
Here ya go.
523
00:21:17,690 --> 00:21:19,480
Hey, man.
You ready to go to lunch?
524
00:21:19,520 --> 00:21:21,570
Yeah, just give me a second,
I'm trying to set aside
525
00:21:21,610 --> 00:21:24,110
a little time every day
to think about Carrie.
526
00:21:25,950 --> 00:21:27,660
And you can't do that
in the truck?
527
00:21:27,700 --> 00:21:29,830
Just give me a sec.
528
00:21:32,660 --> 00:21:39,090
* You are always on my mind *
529
00:21:39,130 --> 00:21:43,130
* You are alwayson my mind *
530
00:21:45,760 --> 00:21:52,470
* You are always on my mind *
531
00:21:52,520 --> 00:21:59,020
* You are alwayson my mind *
532
00:22:01,820 --> 00:22:05,700
[**]
37474
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.