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1
00:00:02,580 --> 00:00:05,040
[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING]
2
00:00:14,380 --> 00:00:15,430
[DOOR OPENS]
3
00:00:15,470 --> 00:00:17,800
Good God, it is cold!
4
00:00:17,850 --> 00:00:20,430
What are you doing here?
I thought you had to go
in early this morning.
5
00:00:20,470 --> 00:00:23,560
I did. I do.
But I have been out there
for the last half hour
6
00:00:23,600 --> 00:00:26,520
trying to scrape the ice off
the stupid windshield.
7
00:00:26,560 --> 00:00:30,610
I think my fingers
broke off into my gloves.
8
00:00:30,650 --> 00:00:33,190
You gonna introduce me
to that frozen stuff
under your nose?
9
00:00:33,240 --> 00:00:36,530
Shut up. Come on, I'm late.
Will you help me, please?
10
00:00:36,570 --> 00:00:37,660
All right, all right.
11
00:00:37,700 --> 00:00:40,540
Dougie's here, okay?
You just relax,
12
00:00:40,580 --> 00:00:42,330
you warm yourself up...
13
00:00:42,370 --> 00:00:45,670
and let a man
do a man's job, Okay?
14
00:00:47,790 --> 00:00:49,460
Looks like you're
wearing a dress.
15
00:00:49,500 --> 00:00:51,340
Hey, don't sass me,
woman.
16
00:00:51,380 --> 00:00:52,460
Just hand me the tool.
17
00:00:52,510 --> 00:00:54,340
-Knock yourself out.
-All right.
18
00:00:55,590 --> 00:00:57,430
[WIND HOWLING]
19
00:01:20,830 --> 00:01:22,290
Arrh!
20
00:01:25,500 --> 00:01:27,460
[BLOWS]
21
00:01:32,300 --> 00:01:34,170
You're taking the train.
22
00:01:36,380 --> 00:01:39,760
SINGER: *My eyesare gettin' weary*
23
00:01:39,800 --> 00:01:42,220
*My back is gettin' tight*
24
00:01:42,260 --> 00:01:44,270
*I'm sitting herein traffic*
25
00:01:44,310 --> 00:01:46,890
*On the Queensboro Bridgetonight*
26
00:01:46,940 --> 00:01:52,440
*But I don't care'cause all I want to do*
27
00:01:52,480 --> 00:01:57,860
*Is cash my check and driveright home to you*
28
00:01:57,900 --> 00:02:00,240
*'Cause, baby,all my life*
29
00:02:00,280 --> 00:02:04,240
*I will be drivin' hometo you*
30
00:02:20,890 --> 00:02:23,010
Hey, Dad.
31
00:02:23,050 --> 00:02:25,020
Hello, sweetheart.
32
00:02:25,060 --> 00:02:27,810
My God, it is freezing
down here!
33
00:02:27,850 --> 00:02:30,350
Yeah, it's a hell of a cold snap
we're having,
34
00:02:30,400 --> 00:02:33,020
but don't worry.
I'm quite fine.
35
00:02:33,060 --> 00:02:34,270
Fine?
36
00:02:34,320 --> 00:02:35,730
Your lips are blue.
37
00:02:35,780 --> 00:02:37,690
I'm fine.
If my lips are blue,
38
00:02:37,740 --> 00:02:38,820
it's probably because
39
00:02:38,860 --> 00:02:41,610
I was chewing some
novelty gum earlier.
40
00:02:43,910 --> 00:02:45,200
You know what?
This is crazy.
41
00:02:45,240 --> 00:02:47,580
Come upstairs. You can sleep in
my office tonight.
42
00:02:47,620 --> 00:02:49,910
Darling, please,
I don't need to come upstairs.
43
00:02:49,960 --> 00:02:51,250
You're not freezing?
44
00:02:51,290 --> 00:02:53,170
Well, I admit
I was rather cold
45
00:02:53,210 --> 00:02:55,380
a few hours ago,
but that passed.
46
00:02:55,420 --> 00:02:58,630
Now, damnedest thing,
47
00:02:58,670 --> 00:03:01,090
I just feel sleepy.
48
00:03:03,640 --> 00:03:05,350
There you go.
49
00:03:05,390 --> 00:03:07,180
Sweet Georgia Brown.
50
00:03:07,220 --> 00:03:09,730
A chair
that turns into a bed.
51
00:03:09,770 --> 00:03:11,850
Now I've seen it all.
52
00:03:11,900 --> 00:03:14,020
It's a Futon.
It's Japanese.
53
00:03:14,060 --> 00:03:15,320
You've never seen
one of these?
54
00:03:15,360 --> 00:03:17,190
Not as such, no.
55
00:03:17,230 --> 00:03:18,990
You got to hand it to
those Japanese, though.
56
00:03:19,030 --> 00:03:20,280
Clever people.
57
00:03:20,320 --> 00:03:21,280
Still a mystery to me
58
00:03:21,320 --> 00:03:22,860
how we ever got them
to surrender
59
00:03:22,910 --> 00:03:24,950
in the second World War.
60
00:03:24,990 --> 00:03:27,200
Well, we did annihilate
2 of their cities.
61
00:03:27,240 --> 00:03:30,120
True enough.
Mystery solved.
62
00:03:32,330 --> 00:03:35,000
Well, hello there,
neighbor!
63
00:03:35,040 --> 00:03:36,920
Hello.
64
00:03:36,960 --> 00:03:38,920
Why'd he call me
neighbor?
65
00:03:38,960 --> 00:03:40,300
I'm moving him up here
for the night.
66
00:03:40,340 --> 00:03:42,090
The basement was freezing.
67
00:03:44,890 --> 00:03:46,760
How freezing?
68
00:03:46,810 --> 00:03:48,720
Stop it.
69
00:03:48,770 --> 00:03:51,140
All right, Dad.
Make yourself comfortable,
70
00:03:51,180 --> 00:03:52,440
and if you need anything,
71
00:03:52,480 --> 00:03:53,810
you just let me know,
all right?
72
00:03:53,850 --> 00:03:55,770
I need nothing. Now,
you kids run along,
73
00:03:55,810 --> 00:03:57,650
do your thing,
and forget I'm even here.
74
00:03:57,690 --> 00:03:58,820
Okay. Good night.
75
00:03:58,860 --> 00:03:59,860
I love you.
76
00:03:59,900 --> 00:04:01,110
Good night.
77
00:04:02,240 --> 00:04:03,950
Douglas.
78
00:04:03,990 --> 00:04:05,950
What's your preference
incense-wise,
79
00:04:05,990 --> 00:04:07,330
vanilla or musk?
80
00:04:13,040 --> 00:04:14,170
So, just to review,
81
00:04:14,210 --> 00:04:16,290
I want to order
the deluxe miracle wand,
82
00:04:16,330 --> 00:04:21,380
the waterproof pen, and
3 cans of the spray-on hair.
83
00:04:21,420 --> 00:04:24,130
In orange, yes.
It's for a friend.
84
00:04:24,180 --> 00:04:27,050
All right! Thank you
for your help, young man.
85
00:04:28,510 --> 00:04:31,180
I can expect it on Tuesday?
Wow, that's speedy.
86
00:04:31,220 --> 00:04:33,980
Where you located, anyway?
87
00:04:34,020 --> 00:04:35,980
Indiana, huh?
88
00:04:36,020 --> 00:04:37,360
The Hoosier state!
89
00:04:52,370 --> 00:04:53,830
Carrie.
90
00:04:53,870 --> 00:04:55,170
Mm?
91
00:04:55,210 --> 00:04:57,380
I-I'm drenched
in sweat.
92
00:04:59,840 --> 00:05:01,050
Me, too.
93
00:05:02,800 --> 00:05:05,180
Do we have Malaria?
94
00:05:05,220 --> 00:05:08,720
It's boiling in here!
95
00:05:08,760 --> 00:05:10,850
Ohh...
96
00:05:14,230 --> 00:05:16,350
The thermostat
is set at 90!
97
00:05:16,390 --> 00:05:18,020
He's trying
to cook us!
98
00:05:18,060 --> 00:05:20,400
No. He probably
just got cold at night
99
00:05:20,440 --> 00:05:21,980
and couldn't see
the numbers, that's all.
100
00:05:22,030 --> 00:05:23,360
Oh, come on,
he sees.
101
00:05:23,400 --> 00:05:25,400
He sees exactly
what he wants to see.
102
00:05:27,240 --> 00:05:29,280
Wha--whoa! What
are you, insane?
103
00:05:29,320 --> 00:05:30,780
Well, I'm trying to
cool the room down.
104
00:05:30,830 --> 00:05:33,080
Doug, we are hot and sweaty,
and it's 10 below out there.
105
00:05:33,120 --> 00:05:35,080
That's how people die.
106
00:05:39,080 --> 00:05:40,210
I need it open a crack.
107
00:05:40,250 --> 00:05:43,420
Fine. I'm gonna go
make some coffee.
108
00:05:45,090 --> 00:05:47,970
Oh, God...
it's 6:30.
109
00:05:48,010 --> 00:05:50,510
I haven't been up this early
on a Saturday since I was 2.
110
00:05:52,060 --> 00:05:54,100
Even then I was annoyed.
111
00:05:56,310 --> 00:05:57,310
Morning, neighbor!
112
00:05:59,270 --> 00:06:01,820
Oh, what
a beautiful morning.
113
00:06:01,860 --> 00:06:04,570
I love these cold, crisp days.
Don't you, Douglas?
114
00:06:04,610 --> 00:06:06,820
Uh-huh.
115
00:06:08,530 --> 00:06:10,160
You know,
when I was a boy,
116
00:06:10,200 --> 00:06:13,080
winter time was
my favorite time of year.
117
00:06:13,120 --> 00:06:15,870
I remember one winter...
[CHUCKLES]
118
00:06:15,910 --> 00:06:17,960
I couldn't have been
more than 8 or 9--
119
00:06:18,000 --> 00:06:20,250
no, I was 10--
120
00:06:20,290 --> 00:06:22,040
No, no, I couldn't
have been 10.
121
00:06:22,090 --> 00:06:23,920
I was in the army.
122
00:06:23,960 --> 00:06:26,380
Well, anyway,
123
00:06:26,420 --> 00:06:30,220
there I was at Fort Dix,
and they put me...
124
00:06:30,260 --> 00:06:31,430
MAN [OVER TV]:Well, we'reheading into our fourth day
125
00:06:31,470 --> 00:06:33,100
in a rowof subzero temperatures
126
00:06:33,140 --> 00:06:34,310
with no end in sight.
127
00:06:34,350 --> 00:06:36,810
Boy, is there eggon my face!
128
00:06:36,850 --> 00:06:38,980
I said it was supposedto warm up by Saturday.
129
00:06:39,020 --> 00:06:41,940
Hope you didn't plan anypicnics on my say-so, ha ha!
130
00:06:41,980 --> 00:06:43,110
[MOCKING LAUGHTER]
131
00:06:43,150 --> 00:06:44,440
You're so funny, yeah.
132
00:06:44,480 --> 00:06:46,230
Oh, look at that.
The sun's got earmuffs,
133
00:06:46,280 --> 00:06:48,110
and the big cloud
is blowing!
134
00:06:48,150 --> 00:06:51,030
You make me sick!
135
00:06:53,200 --> 00:06:55,450
ARTHUR: Okay. Morning, Douglas.
136
00:06:55,490 --> 00:06:56,950
Wh-what are you doing?
137
00:06:57,000 --> 00:06:59,290
Just getting a few things
to bring upstairs.
138
00:06:59,330 --> 00:07:01,120
Have you read
Lonesome Dove?
139
00:07:01,170 --> 00:07:03,000
Can't say
that I have.
140
00:07:03,040 --> 00:07:07,050
Apparently it's "A gripping
epic tale of the old west."
141
00:07:07,090 --> 00:07:10,090
I'll be sure to float it
across the hall to you
when I'm done.
142
00:07:11,630 --> 00:07:13,220
CARRIE:
Hi, Dad.
143
00:07:13,260 --> 00:07:14,890
Hello.
144
00:07:14,930 --> 00:07:17,350
Don't hello me.
Did you see him?
Did you? Did you?
145
00:07:17,390 --> 00:07:18,430
Yes.
146
00:07:18,480 --> 00:07:21,230
Yeah, and what
was he carrying?
147
00:07:21,270 --> 00:07:22,980
Some stuff.
148
00:07:23,020 --> 00:07:25,900
No, no, not "some stuff".
Some personal stuff.
149
00:07:25,940 --> 00:07:27,530
All right, so he
brought up a book. Big deal.
150
00:07:27,570 --> 00:07:29,070
No, 2 books,
Carrie, 2!
151
00:07:29,110 --> 00:07:31,570
And one was
thick as a steak!
152
00:07:31,610 --> 00:07:33,160
And he had some clothes
and some kind of clock--
153
00:07:33,200 --> 00:07:34,450
All right.
What's your point?
154
00:07:34,490 --> 00:07:36,410
He's nesting!
155
00:07:36,450 --> 00:07:37,950
You showed him a nice,
warm place,
156
00:07:37,990 --> 00:07:39,080
and he likes it.
157
00:07:39,120 --> 00:07:40,500
He's made it
his own,
158
00:07:40,540 --> 00:07:42,170
and now he's getting ready
to lay his eggs.
159
00:07:45,290 --> 00:07:48,090
Okay, thank you
for that image.
160
00:07:48,130 --> 00:07:49,340
Carrie, what are we gonna do?
That's our space!
161
00:07:49,380 --> 00:07:51,510
That's our...
Arthur-free zone.
162
00:07:51,550 --> 00:07:54,220
Doug, what do you want me to do?
I can't send him
back downstairs.
163
00:07:54,260 --> 00:07:55,640
I mean, he might
freeze to death.
164
00:07:55,680 --> 00:07:57,140
He might not.
He might not, right?
165
00:07:57,180 --> 00:07:59,020
We can check on him
from time to time.
166
00:07:59,060 --> 00:08:01,520
I can bring cocoa.
167
00:08:01,560 --> 00:08:04,060
Doug, I am not making him
move downstairs.
168
00:08:04,100 --> 00:08:06,110
It is too cold.
169
00:08:06,150 --> 00:08:08,690
Why is it so cold?
170
00:08:08,730 --> 00:08:12,320
What ever happened to that
global warming
they talked about?
171
00:08:12,360 --> 00:08:14,910
I had such
high hopes for that.
172
00:08:14,950 --> 00:08:16,410
Honey, just relax, okay?
173
00:08:16,450 --> 00:08:18,240
As soon
as it warms back up,
174
00:08:18,280 --> 00:08:21,370
he will go downstairs
all on his own, okay?
175
00:08:21,410 --> 00:08:24,540
I'd like so much to
believe that's true.
176
00:08:24,580 --> 00:08:27,040
It is. Trust me.
177
00:08:27,090 --> 00:08:28,630
MAN [OVER RADIO]:...anda strong high-pressure system
178
00:08:28,670 --> 00:08:30,170
moved into the New York areaovernight,
179
00:08:30,210 --> 00:08:31,670
bringing balmy temperatures,
180
00:08:31,720 --> 00:08:33,590
which should staywith us through the weekend.
181
00:08:33,630 --> 00:08:36,930
WCBS News time, 6:45.
182
00:08:36,970 --> 00:08:37,640
[TURNS RADIO OFF]
183
00:08:37,680 --> 00:08:39,220
Carrie.
184
00:08:39,260 --> 00:08:41,220
-Hmm?
-Carrie, did you hear that?
185
00:08:41,270 --> 00:08:42,520
The guy
on the radio...
186
00:08:42,560 --> 00:08:45,400
he said it's
gonna be balmy out.
187
00:08:45,440 --> 00:08:48,480
Balmy means warm,
right?
188
00:08:48,520 --> 00:08:50,030
It's balmy.
189
00:08:50,070 --> 00:08:51,230
Ba-balmy, balmy.
190
00:08:51,280 --> 00:08:53,400
It's ba-balmy balmy
balmy.
191
00:08:53,450 --> 00:08:57,240
It's balmy.
It's balmy.
B-b-balmy--
192
00:08:57,280 --> 00:08:59,700
Damn it, now I said it too much.
It's got no meaning!
193
00:08:59,740 --> 00:09:01,410
Where's
the dictionary?
194
00:09:01,450 --> 00:09:04,080
Or I could just go
and open the window
195
00:09:04,120 --> 00:09:05,210
and find out.
196
00:09:05,250 --> 00:09:07,000
Yeah, do that.
197
00:09:14,510 --> 00:09:16,260
Oh...
198
00:09:16,300 --> 00:09:17,390
it is warm.
199
00:09:17,430 --> 00:09:18,550
-DOUG: It is?
-Yeah.
200
00:09:18,600 --> 00:09:19,720
It is!
201
00:09:19,760 --> 00:09:21,180
Hee hee!
202
00:09:21,220 --> 00:09:23,180
It's, like--it's,
like, 40 degrees out.
203
00:09:23,220 --> 00:09:24,770
God...hey, honey,
204
00:09:24,810 --> 00:09:27,730
look at the drippy icicle,
huh?
205
00:09:27,770 --> 00:09:30,980
Oh. Oh, and look
at the little squirrel.
206
00:09:31,020 --> 00:09:33,570
Hi there, fella.
207
00:09:33,610 --> 00:09:36,030
Look at him. Look at him
with the little acorn
in his little hands.
208
00:09:36,070 --> 00:09:38,280
Mmm.
209
00:09:38,320 --> 00:09:40,370
Yeah. You're happy
'cause it's warm.
210
00:09:40,410 --> 00:09:42,490
-Yeah.
-Yes, you are.
211
00:09:42,540 --> 00:09:44,660
Yes, you are--whoa!
212
00:09:46,370 --> 00:09:48,580
Whoa, he really
came at us, huh?
213
00:09:48,630 --> 00:09:51,000
Yeah. He didn't look
quite right, did he?
214
00:09:51,040 --> 00:09:52,380
So, uh...
215
00:09:52,420 --> 00:09:53,510
you gonna go
across the hall
216
00:09:53,550 --> 00:09:55,090
and tell your father
it's warm?
217
00:09:55,130 --> 00:09:57,300
-No.
-Why not?
218
00:09:57,340 --> 00:09:59,090
Well, I don't want
to seem overeager.
219
00:09:59,140 --> 00:10:00,260
It'll just spook him.
220
00:10:00,300 --> 00:10:01,600
Let's just
leave him alone.
221
00:10:01,640 --> 00:10:04,020
He'll go back down
on his own tonight.
222
00:10:04,060 --> 00:10:06,140
Carrie, I love you
very much,
223
00:10:06,180 --> 00:10:07,520
but if
you are wrong,
224
00:10:07,560 --> 00:10:09,310
I will tie you down outside
225
00:10:09,350 --> 00:10:11,060
and sprinkle
you with acorns.
226
00:10:11,110 --> 00:10:13,360
[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING]
227
00:10:18,150 --> 00:10:19,700
LANSBURY [OVER TV]:... whenthe embezzlement came out,
228
00:10:19,740 --> 00:10:21,320
Marian might add things up.
229
00:10:21,370 --> 00:10:23,030
She might rememberthe briefcase,
230
00:10:23,080 --> 00:10:25,040
the missing money,who took it.
231
00:10:25,080 --> 00:10:26,710
You had to silence her,
232
00:10:26,750 --> 00:10:28,830
and once she was dead,the case would be closed.
233
00:10:28,870 --> 00:10:31,420
[CLOSING CREDITS MUSIC PLAYS]
234
00:10:31,460 --> 00:10:34,090
Oh, gosh,
I am getting tired.
235
00:10:34,130 --> 00:10:37,510
Whoo! Oh, yeah.
Getting on towards bedtime.
236
00:10:38,800 --> 00:10:41,590
What a warm night.
237
00:10:41,640 --> 00:10:42,680
It is warm,
isn't it?
238
00:10:42,720 --> 00:10:45,430
Oh, it's downright balmy.
239
00:10:45,470 --> 00:10:47,390
Well, kids, I think
I'm gonna turn in.
240
00:10:47,430 --> 00:10:49,230
Oh, yeah, you gonna?
241
00:10:49,270 --> 00:10:52,110
You gonna...
head on down to bed?
242
00:10:52,150 --> 00:10:54,230
Yeah. It's getting late.
243
00:10:54,270 --> 00:10:55,480
Sleep tight.
244
00:10:55,530 --> 00:10:57,440
-You, too, Dad.
-Yeah. Good night.
245
00:11:17,420 --> 00:11:18,550
He went down.
246
00:11:18,590 --> 00:11:20,550
You see?
I told you he would.
247
00:11:20,590 --> 00:11:22,550
You did tell me, and thank you
for telling me,
248
00:11:22,590 --> 00:11:24,800
and thank you for
being the smart and nice
249
00:11:24,850 --> 00:11:27,720
and decent person
I always knew you were.
250
00:11:27,770 --> 00:11:30,480
Just some beans in case
I get hungry in the wee hours.
251
00:11:30,520 --> 00:11:31,810
Good night.
252
00:11:36,570 --> 00:11:37,570
CARRIE: Doug...
253
00:11:37,610 --> 00:11:39,280
you're hurting me.
254
00:11:43,990 --> 00:11:46,910
[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING]
255
00:11:50,040 --> 00:11:51,160
Hey.
256
00:11:51,210 --> 00:11:53,380
Greetings.
257
00:11:53,420 --> 00:11:55,000
How was your day?
258
00:11:55,040 --> 00:11:56,920
Very good.
259
00:11:56,960 --> 00:11:59,590
Somebody misspelled the word
"plaintiff" in a brief today
and I caught it,
260
00:11:59,630 --> 00:12:03,050
so I'm thinking any day now
on that big raise.
261
00:12:03,090 --> 00:12:05,050
Ha ha. Yeah.
262
00:12:07,810 --> 00:12:10,930
-Still up there, huh?
-Oh, he's still up there.
263
00:12:12,060 --> 00:12:13,850
Man...
264
00:12:13,900 --> 00:12:16,060
any chance
he's up there packing?
265
00:12:16,110 --> 00:12:17,690
He's been hammering.
266
00:12:17,730 --> 00:12:19,530
Oh, my God.
267
00:12:19,570 --> 00:12:20,900
What are we
gonna do?
268
00:12:20,940 --> 00:12:22,400
What are we
gonna do?
269
00:12:22,450 --> 00:12:24,200
I think the person
who invited him upstairs
270
00:12:24,240 --> 00:12:26,570
should put him on down,
hmm-ski?
271
00:12:27,780 --> 00:12:29,740
I have to evict
my own father?
272
00:12:29,790 --> 00:12:31,120
Yeah, that
should be fun.
273
00:12:31,160 --> 00:12:32,870
Hey, you know what?
We can make it fun, you know?
274
00:12:32,910 --> 00:12:35,000
We'll hire a clown or maybe
a singing telegram, you know?
275
00:12:35,040 --> 00:12:37,920
*Old man, you gotto move on down*
276
00:12:37,960 --> 00:12:41,420
I'm off-key. You got to imagine
a professional doing it.
277
00:12:41,460 --> 00:12:44,130
Doug, how...how bad
would it be
278
00:12:44,180 --> 00:12:46,430
if we just let him
live in that room?
279
00:12:46,470 --> 00:12:49,100
You mean that room.
280
00:12:49,140 --> 00:12:51,640
Thatroom.
281
00:12:51,680 --> 00:12:54,690
Tha-a-atroom.
282
00:12:54,730 --> 00:12:56,860
-Now, come on, stop it.
-What are you saying,
283
00:12:56,900 --> 00:12:58,770
you want him to live
across the hall from us?
284
00:12:58,820 --> 00:13:00,150
Well, Doug, I don't know
what else to do.
285
00:13:00,190 --> 00:13:01,530
I mean, it's so obvious
286
00:13:01,570 --> 00:13:03,190
he just wants to be
close to us.
287
00:13:03,240 --> 00:13:04,650
You know, he's
like a little kid
288
00:13:04,700 --> 00:13:06,910
who wants to crawl into bed
with his parents at night.
289
00:13:06,950 --> 00:13:08,450
Oh, yeah,
I guess you're right.
290
00:13:08,490 --> 00:13:09,740
You know what we should do? We
should leave the door unlocked.
291
00:13:09,780 --> 00:13:10,910
That way he can come in
any time he wants,
292
00:13:10,950 --> 00:13:13,910
and all 3 of us
can spoon. Yeah!
293
00:13:13,960 --> 00:13:16,670
Look, I know it's not ideal,
but what if we...
294
00:13:16,710 --> 00:13:18,710
what if we laid
some ground rules first?
295
00:13:18,750 --> 00:13:20,000
-No, Carrie.
-Like he can't talk on the phone
296
00:13:20,050 --> 00:13:21,670
after 10:00,
he can't cook...
297
00:13:21,710 --> 00:13:22,800
-Carrie.
-He can't keep testing
298
00:13:22,840 --> 00:13:25,550
-the smoke alarms--
-Shh! Shh! Shh!
299
00:13:25,590 --> 00:13:27,510
Honey, it's not
about the phone.
300
00:13:27,550 --> 00:13:29,600
It's not about
the smoke alarms.
301
00:13:29,640 --> 00:13:31,970
It's not even about
the odd smells.
302
00:13:33,770 --> 00:13:37,020
It's about the very essence
of him being across the hall.
303
00:13:37,060 --> 00:13:38,100
It's wrong,
304
00:13:38,150 --> 00:13:40,650
and we both know it.
305
00:13:41,570 --> 00:13:44,150
-But what--
-Shh! Shh! Shh!
306
00:13:44,940 --> 00:13:47,910
We both know it.
307
00:13:47,950 --> 00:13:50,280
All right, a little up
the nose on that one, honey.
308
00:13:50,330 --> 00:13:52,080
-Oh, was I?
-Yeah.
309
00:13:53,540 --> 00:13:55,540
-Oh. Hello, kids.
-Hi.
310
00:13:55,580 --> 00:13:57,870
I had this blown up
at the drug store.
311
00:13:57,920 --> 00:14:01,670
The bastards took me for
11.95, but it's worth it.
312
00:14:04,090 --> 00:14:05,260
Um...Dad,
313
00:14:05,300 --> 00:14:07,680
Doug--Doug and I
were just thinking--
314
00:14:07,720 --> 00:14:10,050
Hope you didn't sprain
anything.
315
00:14:10,100 --> 00:14:11,760
I tease with love.
316
00:14:11,810 --> 00:14:13,100
Come in. Relax.
317
00:14:13,140 --> 00:14:14,970
Help yourself to
a sucking candy.
318
00:14:15,020 --> 00:14:16,640
Oh.
319
00:14:16,690 --> 00:14:17,480
So you've gotten pretty
comfortable up here, huh?
320
00:14:17,520 --> 00:14:19,650
Oh, yeah.
That cold snap
321
00:14:19,690 --> 00:14:21,980
was a blessing
in disguise.
322
00:14:22,020 --> 00:14:24,150
Of course, I feel badly
for the 12 people who died,
323
00:14:24,190 --> 00:14:27,860
but for me, it couldn't
have worked out better.
324
00:14:30,700 --> 00:14:33,160
Well, actually, Dad,
the thing is, uh...
325
00:14:33,200 --> 00:14:34,790
Yes, darling?
326
00:14:34,830 --> 00:14:37,330
Well, now that it's--
that it's--
327
00:14:37,370 --> 00:14:39,620
that it's warmed up,
um...
328
00:14:39,670 --> 00:14:41,670
we just thought
that, uh...
329
00:14:41,710 --> 00:14:44,710
you know, you should--well,
we--we should all go back
330
00:14:44,750 --> 00:14:48,630
to our original
living...situations.
331
00:14:49,220 --> 00:14:50,890
I don't follow.
332
00:14:53,350 --> 00:14:55,680
Well, like, um...
333
00:14:55,720 --> 00:14:58,020
ahem--you know, we should
all go back to the rooms
334
00:14:58,060 --> 00:15:01,730
that we were in before
it got so cold, you know?
335
00:15:01,770 --> 00:15:03,860
Like, uh, oh,
like Doug--Doug and I
336
00:15:03,900 --> 00:15:07,110
we were--were
in that room, so...
337
00:15:07,150 --> 00:15:08,190
I guess--I guess
we w-would
338
00:15:08,240 --> 00:15:10,160
probably stay
in there then, right?
339
00:15:10,200 --> 00:15:11,870
Yeah. Right. Okay, yeah.
340
00:15:11,910 --> 00:15:13,870
And then you, Dad,
you should, uh...
341
00:15:13,910 --> 00:15:15,700
I should move back
to the basement.
342
00:15:15,740 --> 00:15:17,000
Is that where you were,
down there?
343
00:15:17,040 --> 00:15:19,040
Oh! Okay, great! Good!
So we're all set. All right.
344
00:15:19,080 --> 00:15:22,130
Okay, so you need help
moving anything, or, uh...
345
00:15:26,420 --> 00:15:29,220
I must say I feel
rather foolish.
346
00:15:29,260 --> 00:15:31,380
I didn't realize...
347
00:15:31,430 --> 00:15:34,050
this arrangement
was such a problem for you.
348
00:15:34,100 --> 00:15:36,350
It's not a--
it's not a problem per se.
349
00:15:36,390 --> 00:15:38,680
-It's just--
-You were up, you're down,
350
00:15:38,730 --> 00:15:40,310
it's crazy, you know?
Before, when we needed you,
351
00:15:40,350 --> 00:15:41,810
it was, like,
"Hey, where's Arthur?"
352
00:15:41,850 --> 00:15:43,810
"Where is he?
He's in the basement.
353
00:15:43,860 --> 00:15:45,020
He's Basement Artie."
354
00:15:45,070 --> 00:15:46,110
That was our nickname for you.
355
00:15:46,150 --> 00:15:48,070
Yeah. Can't
change it now.
356
00:15:48,110 --> 00:15:51,200
Please, don't insult
my intelligence.
357
00:15:51,240 --> 00:15:54,370
If my presence here is
so distasteful to you,
358
00:15:54,410 --> 00:15:57,740
at least have the courtesy
to say it to my face.
359
00:16:01,290 --> 00:16:03,790
So be it.
360
00:16:03,830 --> 00:16:05,380
Well, I understand.
361
00:16:15,800 --> 00:16:17,930
I'll reimburse you
for the spackle.
362
00:16:29,900 --> 00:16:31,990
Delicious chicken, Carrie.
363
00:16:32,030 --> 00:16:33,660
You've outdone
yourself again.
364
00:16:33,700 --> 00:16:35,030
Thank you, Dad.
365
00:16:35,070 --> 00:16:36,910
I made it
just the way you like it.
366
00:16:36,950 --> 00:16:38,700
Nice and pink
inside.
367
00:16:41,080 --> 00:16:42,960
Douglas,
368
00:16:43,000 --> 00:16:45,000
your anecdote about
the vending machine at work
369
00:16:45,040 --> 00:16:48,090
was amusing,
yet quite poignant.
370
00:16:48,130 --> 00:16:50,130
Thank you, Arthur.
371
00:16:52,170 --> 00:16:54,090
Think I'll call it
a night.
372
00:16:54,130 --> 00:16:56,680
MAN [OVER TV]:
Well, folks, if it felt likeit was getting colder today,
373
00:16:56,720 --> 00:16:57,850
it wasn't your imagination.
374
00:16:57,890 --> 00:16:59,970
Jack Frost is backwith a vengeance.
375
00:17:00,020 --> 00:17:02,020
Temperatures should dropwell below zero tonight
376
00:17:02,060 --> 00:17:05,190
and stay down in that rangethrough the weekend.
377
00:17:05,230 --> 00:17:08,270
I'm getting my long johnsout of the closet, Steve.How about you?
378
00:17:08,310 --> 00:17:10,730
Nighty-night.
379
00:17:19,910 --> 00:17:23,040
Okay, Dad, come on.
What are you doing?
380
00:17:23,080 --> 00:17:25,330
Just reading a bit
before I retire.
381
00:17:27,000 --> 00:17:29,880
Okay, Dad, you made your point.
Now, come on.
382
00:17:29,920 --> 00:17:31,800
You have to sleep
upstairs tonight.
383
00:17:31,840 --> 00:17:34,340
Sleep upstairs?
But I'm Basement Artie.
384
00:17:34,380 --> 00:17:36,930
I'd hate to lose
that little moniker.
385
00:17:36,970 --> 00:17:40,260
You know what? You
can jump in anytime.
386
00:17:40,310 --> 00:17:42,720
Um...
c-come on, Arthur.
387
00:17:42,770 --> 00:17:45,190
We both want you
to come upstairs.
388
00:17:45,230 --> 00:17:48,520
Unless you're positive
you're okay down here.
389
00:17:48,560 --> 00:17:50,520
-Doug.
-Uh, come on up, Arthur.
390
00:17:50,570 --> 00:17:51,940
Yeah, Dad. Stop
being a martyr.
391
00:17:51,980 --> 00:17:53,860
You will freeze to death
down here!
392
00:17:53,900 --> 00:17:55,030
Oh, will I?
393
00:17:55,070 --> 00:17:57,030
Well, let me tell
you both something.
394
00:17:57,070 --> 00:17:59,320
I'd much rather freeze
by the natural hand of God
395
00:17:59,370 --> 00:18:00,450
than by the icy chill
396
00:18:00,490 --> 00:18:03,410
you two have created
up in that room!
397
00:18:03,450 --> 00:18:05,410
Of course,
I speak figuratively.
398
00:18:05,460 --> 00:18:08,120
I very much want to live.
399
00:18:08,170 --> 00:18:10,540
Okay, that's enough,
Dad.
400
00:18:10,590 --> 00:18:12,210
You are sleeping
upstairs,
401
00:18:12,250 --> 00:18:13,800
and that is final.
402
00:18:13,840 --> 00:18:15,340
No, I am not.
403
00:18:15,380 --> 00:18:16,760
-Yes, you are.
-No!
404
00:18:16,800 --> 00:18:17,930
CARRIE: Fine. Fine.
You know what?
405
00:18:17,970 --> 00:18:19,470
You want to sleep down here?
That's fine.
406
00:18:19,510 --> 00:18:20,970
But you will not have
a blanket,
407
00:18:21,010 --> 00:18:22,890
and you will not
have a pillow,
408
00:18:22,930 --> 00:18:24,770
and you will not
have a light bulb--ow!
409
00:18:24,810 --> 00:18:26,270
Dad, will you just
come upstairs?
410
00:18:26,310 --> 00:18:27,850
I will not.
411
00:18:27,890 --> 00:18:29,480
I will not sleep
across the hall
412
00:18:29,520 --> 00:18:31,770
from two people
who do not want me near them,
413
00:18:31,820 --> 00:18:33,780
and that's final!
414
00:18:37,110 --> 00:18:40,030
[SNORING]
415
00:18:53,460 --> 00:18:54,920
Could you move over?
416
00:18:54,960 --> 00:18:56,420
I have one leg off
the side as it is, right?
417
00:18:56,460 --> 00:18:58,300
And give me
some blanket!
418
00:19:00,140 --> 00:19:01,340
Watch the knee!
419
00:19:24,580 --> 00:19:26,660
[SIGHS]
420
00:19:28,540 --> 00:19:31,370
["THE WAY WE WERE" PLAYS]
421
00:20:21,930 --> 00:20:25,010
Yeah, it was quite a time.
422
00:20:37,360 --> 00:20:40,860
[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]
30119
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