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[instrumental music]
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00:00:03,670 --> 00:00:06,006
[music on headphones]
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00:00:14,581 --> 00:00:15,749
‐ Pop! Pop! Pop!
‐ Oh!
4
00:00:18,284 --> 00:00:19,586
Dirk, what are you doing, man?
5
00:00:19,620 --> 00:00:21,722
You tell me. What's up with the
treadmill?
6
00:00:21,755 --> 00:00:23,256
Just gettin' my life
back together.
7
00:00:23,289 --> 00:00:25,792
Mind, body and spirit, baby.
8
00:00:27,260 --> 00:00:28,629
What'd you do to head?
9
00:00:28,662 --> 00:00:30,631
New Robert, new stee.
10
00:00:30,664 --> 00:00:33,166
‐ Oh, here we go.
‐ Come on, man.
11
00:00:33,199 --> 00:00:34,568
Five months ago,
I had it all.
12
00:00:34,601 --> 00:00:36,169
Tia and I
were about to get married
13
00:00:36,202 --> 00:00:38,404
we were having a baby
and I had a great job.
14
00:00:38,438 --> 00:00:42,375
Yeah, yeah,
"But she wasn't really pregnant.
15
00:00:42,408 --> 00:00:44,511
"And then we broke up.
16
00:00:44,545 --> 00:00:46,246
And the show got canceled."
17
00:00:47,614 --> 00:00:48,815
I know the story man,
I'm just saying
18
00:00:48,849 --> 00:00:50,116
it's not your head's fault.
19
00:00:50,150 --> 00:00:51,552
Hey, look, the bottom line is
20
00:00:51,585 --> 00:00:53,119
I'm a single man again, alright?
21
00:00:53,153 --> 00:00:54,354
And I'm gonna get focused
22
00:00:54,387 --> 00:00:56,156
on me and my son
in going forward
23
00:00:56,189 --> 00:00:58,792
back to front! Alright?
24
00:00:58,825 --> 00:01:00,326
It's symbolic, alright?
25
00:01:00,360 --> 00:01:02,529
All I gotta do
is follow the stripe
26
00:01:02,563 --> 00:01:04,397
and it'll take me
where I need to go.
27
00:01:04,430 --> 00:01:06,466
I'll tell you
where you need to go.
28
00:01:06,499 --> 00:01:08,368
Tijuana.
29
00:01:08,401 --> 00:01:10,370
Listen, they got these
ladies down there, right?
30
00:01:10,403 --> 00:01:13,239
Twenty dollars, they take
this lotion, they rub it
31
00:01:13,273 --> 00:01:16,743
all over your ashy elbows!
32
00:01:16,777 --> 00:01:18,478
‐ Hey, hey, what's up, Bobby?
‐ Hey, son.
33
00:01:18,512 --> 00:01:20,313
What are you doing
with my clippers?
34
00:01:20,346 --> 00:01:22,816
New Bobby, new stee.
35
00:01:22,849 --> 00:01:23,817
Oh!
36
00:01:27,353 --> 00:01:29,122
You're lookin' like a
little George Jefferson.
37
00:01:31,157 --> 00:01:33,359
Oh, my God!
38
00:01:33,393 --> 00:01:34,494
Gi‐give me those.
Give me those.
39
00:01:35,829 --> 00:01:37,463
Boy, you look crazy.
40
00:01:37,497 --> 00:01:39,499
But not as daddy
'cause daddy looks focused.
41
00:01:40,634 --> 00:01:42,335
I am, Dirk. Alright?
42
00:01:42,368 --> 00:01:43,570
I'm heading down the right path
43
00:01:43,604 --> 00:01:45,438
and that's the path
of happiness.
44
00:01:45,471 --> 00:01:47,340
All I got to do
is stay on that path
45
00:01:47,373 --> 00:01:49,743
and there's nothin' but
blue skies heading my way.
46
00:01:50,577 --> 00:01:52,513
[whimpering]
47
00:01:54,180 --> 00:01:57,684
M‐m‐my place just burned down.
48
00:01:59,319 --> 00:02:00,854
[coughing]
49
00:02:00,887 --> 00:02:02,455
He got his mama's hair.
50
00:02:06,627 --> 00:02:08,829
♪ Often I wish that we ♪
51
00:02:08,862 --> 00:02:11,364
♪ Could take the time to see ♪
52
00:02:11,397 --> 00:02:13,299
♪ The need there is to be ♪
53
00:02:13,333 --> 00:02:15,702
♪ A family yeah ♪
54
00:02:15,736 --> 00:02:18,171
♪ 'Cause it's All Of Us ♪
55
00:02:18,204 --> 00:02:20,373
♪ Sometimes it can be rough ♪
56
00:02:20,406 --> 00:02:22,242
♪ Time and seasons change ♪
57
00:02:22,275 --> 00:02:24,578
♪ But we will still remain ♪
58
00:02:24,611 --> 00:02:27,581
♪ It's just All Of Us ♪
59
00:02:27,614 --> 00:02:30,584
♪ It's just All Of Us ♪♪♪
60
00:02:33,587 --> 00:02:35,522
[instrumental music]
61
00:02:35,556 --> 00:02:37,824
So, I was making those
little apricot tarts
62
00:02:37,858 --> 00:02:39,726
you know, not the ones
with the jelly
63
00:02:39,760 --> 00:02:41,528
the ones with
the real apricots and
64
00:02:41,562 --> 00:02:44,364
I was drizzling butter
on top of 'em and they were..
65
00:02:44,397 --> 00:02:45,932
Mm.
66
00:02:45,966 --> 00:02:47,901
Well, I mean,
but I‐I turned away
67
00:02:47,934 --> 00:02:50,937
for one minute an‐and
and the stove caught on fire
68
00:02:50,971 --> 00:02:54,775
and then the wall
and then the whole kitchen and..
69
00:02:54,808 --> 00:02:56,643
What happened to your head?
70
00:02:58,444 --> 00:03:01,582
Hey, now is not the time to
be worried about Robert's head.
71
00:03:01,615 --> 00:03:02,749
Worry about Bobby's.
72
00:03:05,719 --> 00:03:07,487
‐ Oh!
‐ Uh, it's..
73
00:03:07,521 --> 00:03:08,855
It's being handled, Neesee.
74
00:03:10,524 --> 00:03:12,693
Are you sure
you're gonna be okay, mommy?
75
00:03:12,726 --> 00:03:14,661
Of course, baby.
76
00:03:14,695 --> 00:03:18,398
Yeah, a‐and it's not like
I lost everything.
77
00:03:18,431 --> 00:03:20,667
Yeah, while,
while I was running out
78
00:03:20,701 --> 00:03:22,936
I reached in the smoke
and I‐I grabbed this.
79
00:03:25,539 --> 00:03:26,540
What is it?
80
00:03:27,440 --> 00:03:28,474
I don't know.
81
00:03:29,876 --> 00:03:31,211
It's okay, mommy.
82
00:03:32,613 --> 00:03:34,515
‐ Thank you, baby.
‐ I'm out!
83
00:03:34,548 --> 00:03:35,649
This makes me uncomfortable.
84
00:03:37,651 --> 00:03:40,654
Ah, Robert,
can I use your phone?
85
00:03:40,687 --> 00:03:43,289
‐ I‐I need to call a hotel.
‐ Sure.
86
00:03:43,323 --> 00:03:44,958
Can mommy stay with us, daddy?
87
00:03:44,991 --> 00:03:46,827
‐ Say what? Um, well‐‐
‐ Well..
88
00:03:46,860 --> 00:03:48,695
‐ I don't really think..
‐ Well, the thing is, son..
89
00:03:48,729 --> 00:03:50,631
‐ Is that we, mom and I, we..
‐ I used to fight him and I..
90
00:03:50,664 --> 00:03:52,666
‐ We talked and then‐‐
‐ And I‐‐
91
00:03:52,699 --> 00:03:54,601
Yay!
92
00:04:01,908 --> 00:04:04,711
♪ When I'm alone in my room
sometimes I stare at the wall ♪
93
00:04:04,745 --> 00:04:07,447
♪ In the back of my mind
I hear my conscience call ♪
94
00:04:07,480 --> 00:04:10,016
♪ Sayin' I need a girl
who's sweet as a dove ♪
95
00:04:10,050 --> 00:04:11,585
♪ For the first time
in my life ♪
96
00:04:11,618 --> 00:04:13,720
♪ I swear I need love
I need love ♪
97
00:04:21,528 --> 00:04:22,596
Robert?
98
00:04:23,597 --> 00:04:24,698
Neesee!
99
00:04:26,066 --> 00:04:27,534
Neesee,
what are you doing in here?
100
00:04:27,568 --> 00:04:28,902
You got your bathroom.
101
00:04:28,935 --> 00:04:30,370
I would not put on my makeup
102
00:04:30,403 --> 00:04:33,707
under those prison lights.
Move over.
103
00:04:33,740 --> 00:04:35,008
You know I like my privacy
104
00:04:35,041 --> 00:04:36,677
when I'm in my bathroom.
105
00:04:36,710 --> 00:04:37,978
[chuckles]
Why?
106
00:04:38,011 --> 00:04:40,981
So you can shave your tatas?
107
00:04:41,014 --> 00:04:43,584
[chuckles]
You're just mad
because I got to keep
108
00:04:43,617 --> 00:04:44,818
both of these in the divorce.
109
00:04:47,854 --> 00:04:49,055
(Bobby)
'Mommy!'
110
00:04:51,057 --> 00:04:52,025
What are you doing?
111
00:04:53,393 --> 00:04:54,828
Making sure he don't see us.
112
00:04:54,861 --> 00:04:56,462
Why? Ain't nothin' going on.
113
00:04:56,496 --> 00:04:59,332
Oh, come on, Robert.
114
00:04:59,365 --> 00:05:02,035
I'm in my slip and you
foaming at the boobs.
115
00:05:02,068 --> 00:05:04,104
See? That's why you
shouldn't be in my bathroom.
116
00:05:04,137 --> 00:05:05,338
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
117
00:05:05,371 --> 00:05:06,372
Why is your whispering
118
00:05:06,406 --> 00:05:07,407
louder than your talking?
119
00:05:07,440 --> 00:05:08,408
(Bobby)
'Mommy!'
120
00:05:09,943 --> 00:05:11,712
Why are you in my bathroom?
121
00:05:14,715 --> 00:05:17,350
Hello. Come on in, sweetie.
122
00:05:17,383 --> 00:05:19,452
What are you doing
in daddy's bathroom?
123
00:05:19,485 --> 00:05:20,754
What am I doin'?
124
00:05:23,456 --> 00:05:24,591
Brushing my teeth.
125
00:05:25,959 --> 00:05:28,562
Mommy, it's really fun
having you here.
126
00:05:28,595 --> 00:05:31,932
This is the best way
to be a divorced family.
127
00:05:31,965 --> 00:05:34,835
Aww, you are so sweet, sweetie.
128
00:05:34,868 --> 00:05:36,937
But you do know
it's only for a couple of days.
129
00:05:36,970 --> 00:05:39,873
Now, why don't you go downstairs
and I'll be there in a minute.
130
00:05:39,906 --> 00:05:42,676
But I wanna brush with you
like we always do.
131
00:05:44,545 --> 00:05:45,812
'Come on, mommy!'
132
00:05:50,050 --> 00:05:52,085
This is gonna be so much fun.
133
00:05:56,022 --> 00:05:57,758
[whispering]
That's what you get.
134
00:06:01,127 --> 00:06:03,063
[Neesee chuckles]
135
00:06:09,570 --> 00:06:10,537
Oops!
136
00:06:12,939 --> 00:06:14,941
Don't worry, mommy.
I'll get it.
137
00:06:14,975 --> 00:06:17,143
Oh, oh‐ho, oh!
138
00:06:17,177 --> 00:06:18,579
[laughs]
139
00:06:18,612 --> 00:06:20,480
I'll get your daddy to do that.
140
00:06:20,514 --> 00:06:21,815
It's okay. Go ahead.
141
00:06:23,950 --> 00:06:25,385
No, you don't..
142
00:06:44,805 --> 00:06:46,206
What are you doing?
143
00:06:46,239 --> 00:06:47,641
Oh, uh..
144
00:06:47,674 --> 00:06:49,543
I thought I saw a bug.
145
00:06:50,644 --> 00:06:51,645
Yeah, that's it.
146
00:06:53,514 --> 00:06:54,480
[Robert groans]
147
00:06:56,883 --> 00:06:57,918
I got him.
148
00:06:59,185 --> 00:07:01,487
So, baby, why don't you go
and find dad
149
00:07:01,522 --> 00:07:03,557
and tell him how nice
it is to have me here, huh?
150
00:07:03,590 --> 00:07:06,593
‐ Okay.
‐ Okay. Yep.
151
00:07:06,627 --> 00:07:08,061
Yep.
152
00:07:08,094 --> 00:07:09,062
[grunting]
153
00:07:10,864 --> 00:07:13,767
[panting]
154
00:07:13,800 --> 00:07:15,201
That was cold, Neesee.
155
00:07:15,235 --> 00:07:17,470
No, this is cold!
156
00:07:20,073 --> 00:07:22,509
[instrumental music]
157
00:07:29,249 --> 00:07:31,184
[knock on door]
158
00:07:40,527 --> 00:07:41,928
What the hell is all this?
159
00:07:41,962 --> 00:07:44,197
Stuff they recovered
from Neesee's apartment.
160
00:07:44,230 --> 00:07:46,066
Damn! This what they saved?
161
00:07:47,701 --> 00:07:49,169
Smell like a rib shack
up in here.
162
00:07:50,937 --> 00:07:51,972
What's up, dawg?
163
00:07:52,005 --> 00:07:53,907
Hey, I just heard KJSB
164
00:07:53,940 --> 00:07:55,241
is looking for a new talk show
165
00:07:55,275 --> 00:07:57,844
and I got us lunch with
the head of development.
166
00:07:57,878 --> 00:08:00,514
Hey, look, Dirk,
I wanna get back to work
167
00:08:00,547 --> 00:08:01,815
but it's gotta be right, bro.
168
00:08:01,848 --> 00:08:03,149
‐ It's gotta be right.
‐ You see that?
169
00:08:03,183 --> 00:08:04,685
That's your problem
right there.
170
00:08:04,718 --> 00:08:06,219
You're always lookin'
before you leap.
171
00:08:06,252 --> 00:08:09,656
You gotta flip that.
Just leap before you look.
172
00:08:09,690 --> 00:08:11,224
Alright,
what is he looking for?
173
00:08:11,257 --> 00:08:13,259
I don't know.
That's the fun part.
174
00:08:13,293 --> 00:08:14,661
You and me together, man.
175
00:08:14,695 --> 00:08:17,898
Brainstormin', spit ballin'
176
00:08:17,931 --> 00:08:18,965
think tankin'.
177
00:08:20,233 --> 00:08:21,835
Alright, check this out.
178
00:08:21,868 --> 00:08:23,136
We'll do some research
179
00:08:23,169 --> 00:08:24,605
we'll marinate over it
180
00:08:24,638 --> 00:08:26,773
take our time
and we'll figure it out.
181
00:08:26,807 --> 00:08:29,743
‐ So, when is the meeting?
‐ Tomorrow.
182
00:08:29,776 --> 00:08:32,312
Are you outta your damn mind?
183
00:08:32,345 --> 00:08:34,881
Hey, man, it's not that hard
to think of a new show idea.
184
00:08:34,915 --> 00:08:37,150
Check it.
We do "Fear Factor," right?
185
00:08:37,183 --> 00:08:39,953
We get everybody
drunk first
186
00:08:39,986 --> 00:08:43,156
call it "Beer Factor."
187
00:08:43,189 --> 00:08:45,158
I told you
I don't have the number.
188
00:08:45,191 --> 00:08:47,861
My credit card burned up.
189
00:08:47,894 --> 00:08:50,030
No, I can't fax you my ID.
190
00:08:50,063 --> 00:08:51,565
‐ The card, it‐it burned up.
‐ I got it.
191
00:08:51,598 --> 00:08:53,900
And we're sure
that's how it's gonna be?
192
00:08:53,934 --> 00:08:56,903
I know
this isn't my home phone.
193
00:08:56,937 --> 00:08:58,238
It burned up!
194
00:09:00,140 --> 00:09:02,275
Gordon, I'm done talking to you.
195
00:09:02,308 --> 00:09:03,777
Please find me a supervisor
196
00:09:03,810 --> 00:09:05,746
that understands
the concept of fire!
197
00:09:07,047 --> 00:09:08,348
‐ Um, Neesee?
‐ 'Yeah.'
198
00:09:08,381 --> 00:09:10,016
We're trying
to work over here
199
00:09:10,050 --> 00:09:12,218
just bring the volume
down just a little, just..
200
00:09:12,252 --> 00:09:14,888
Oh, yeah. I'm..
201
00:09:14,921 --> 00:09:17,591
I'm sorry, uh, I'll try
to keep it down. Yeah.
202
00:09:17,624 --> 00:09:21,595
Hello. Oh!
Don't try to change your voice.
203
00:09:21,628 --> 00:09:23,630
Gordon, I know
this is still you!
204
00:09:23,664 --> 00:09:25,231
Now get me a damn supervisor!
205
00:09:26,900 --> 00:09:30,003
Actin' like I'm Boo‐boo,
the fool.
206
00:09:30,036 --> 00:09:32,105
Damn. It's been a week.
How long is she staying here?
207
00:09:32,138 --> 00:09:33,674
Just until
the insurance check comes.
208
00:09:33,707 --> 00:09:35,742
She kickin' in rent, right?
209
00:09:35,776 --> 00:09:37,210
Come on, Dirk, man,
it's not that bad.
210
00:09:37,243 --> 00:09:39,746
I'm helping a woman
in her time of need.
211
00:09:39,780 --> 00:09:42,082
Besides, I'm trying
to practice patience.
212
00:09:44,117 --> 00:09:45,819
Oh, hell no!
213
00:09:47,688 --> 00:09:51,091
That woman did not drink
all my sorbolenes!
214
00:09:51,124 --> 00:09:53,860
You don't never touch
a man's sorbolenes!
215
00:09:53,894 --> 00:09:56,029
This ain't right, Dirk. She's
going to the store right now.
216
00:09:56,062 --> 00:09:58,364
That's right. You tell her.
217
00:09:58,398 --> 00:09:59,933
What the hell is
she thinkin' all up in here
218
00:09:59,966 --> 00:10:01,802
in the refrigerator,
eatin' all the food..
219
00:10:03,236 --> 00:10:06,673
‐ Neesee, we got a problem.
‐ I know.
220
00:10:06,707 --> 00:10:08,308
They're doing
some kind of investigation
221
00:10:08,341 --> 00:10:10,644
and my insurance check
isn't coming.
222
00:10:10,677 --> 00:10:12,345
I might have to stay here
for a while.
223
00:10:14,280 --> 00:10:16,950
Yeah! And while you're there,
pick up some Slim Jims!
224
00:10:19,419 --> 00:10:20,921
[instrumental music]
225
00:10:28,310 --> 00:10:30,112
‐ I got it.
‐ What?
226
00:10:30,146 --> 00:10:31,413
You know how all the shows
these days
227
00:10:31,447 --> 00:10:33,149
are about celebrities
doing something, right?
228
00:10:33,182 --> 00:10:35,985
‐ Right.
‐ What if we flipped that?
229
00:10:36,018 --> 00:10:39,455
And what, do a show about
celebrities doin' nothing?
230
00:10:39,488 --> 00:10:40,790
Yeah, that sucks.
231
00:10:42,158 --> 00:10:43,392
Well, how long is this damn
232
00:10:43,425 --> 00:10:45,361
insurance investigation
gonna take?
233
00:10:45,394 --> 00:10:46,996
Because I need to know
how long I need to stay
234
00:10:47,029 --> 00:10:49,331
in this hell pit
I'm staying in.
235
00:10:51,533 --> 00:10:53,502
Robert, thanks again
for letting me stay.
236
00:10:55,872 --> 00:10:58,240
Uh, hold on,
let me find a pen.
237
00:10:59,108 --> 00:11:00,076
Okay.
238
00:11:02,544 --> 00:11:04,280
Bro, it's been an hour
239
00:11:04,313 --> 00:11:06,048
and I'm tired of living
with Neesee already.
240
00:11:07,549 --> 00:11:09,451
When are you gonna tell her
she can't stay here?
241
00:11:09,485 --> 00:11:11,353
Well, she just survived a fire
242
00:11:11,387 --> 00:11:12,822
so I was figuring
I'll wait until
243
00:11:12,855 --> 00:11:14,056
she fall down
a flight of stairs.
244
00:11:14,090 --> 00:11:16,425
That should be
the perfect time!
245
00:11:16,458 --> 00:11:19,061
Don't you realize your ex‐wife's
not just staying with you
246
00:11:19,095 --> 00:11:20,496
she's living with you?
247
00:11:20,529 --> 00:11:23,165
You know unhealthy that is?
248
00:11:23,199 --> 00:11:25,167
I don't know,
maybe we should ask your ex‐wife
249
00:11:25,201 --> 00:11:28,137
since Janelle
is still living with you.
250
00:11:28,170 --> 00:11:31,307
Hey, at least I get
pity sex from time to time.
251
00:11:31,340 --> 00:11:34,110
Hey, look, let's just
concentrate on the show, okay?
252
00:11:34,143 --> 00:11:37,213
Oh, Robert, uh..
253
00:11:37,246 --> 00:11:38,915
...I'm sorry about all that.
254
00:11:38,948 --> 00:11:41,217
I know this whole situation
is kind of stressful
255
00:11:41,250 --> 00:11:43,552
but I want you to know,
we're gonna work it out.
256
00:11:43,585 --> 00:11:45,922
In fact, I'mma go
to the store for you right now
257
00:11:45,955 --> 00:11:47,456
and get you some..
258
00:11:48,658 --> 00:11:49,826
Oh..
259
00:11:52,061 --> 00:11:53,229
Thank you, Neesee.
260
00:11:53,262 --> 00:11:54,263
So, I'm gonna take your car
261
00:11:54,296 --> 00:11:55,431
because my car is out of gas.
262
00:11:57,433 --> 00:11:59,035
And, uh, do you have a 20?
263
00:12:00,402 --> 00:12:01,470
Uh, sure..
264
00:12:03,539 --> 00:12:05,307
Yeah, all of that is fine.
265
00:12:07,376 --> 00:12:08,477
Thanks.
266
00:12:10,279 --> 00:12:13,215
And I repeat...pity sex.
267
00:12:15,484 --> 00:12:18,520
[instrumental music]
268
00:12:18,554 --> 00:12:21,658
Okay, son, the first step
to a successful meeting
269
00:12:21,691 --> 00:12:23,492
is grooming.
270
00:12:23,525 --> 00:12:25,161
Brush, baby.
271
00:12:25,194 --> 00:12:26,929
‐ Brush, baby.
‐ Uh‐huh!
272
00:12:26,963 --> 00:12:30,132
Next step, stay soft fro, baby.
273
00:12:30,166 --> 00:12:33,269
‐ Stay soft fro, baby.
‐ Uh‐huh! Why?
274
00:12:33,302 --> 00:12:35,104
'Cause we have to make
the fro glow.
275
00:12:35,137 --> 00:12:36,472
[laughing]
276
00:12:36,505 --> 00:12:39,341
And last, cologne, baby!
277
00:12:39,375 --> 00:12:41,911
Cologne.
278
00:12:41,944 --> 00:12:44,380
I said, "Cologne, baby!"
279
00:12:44,413 --> 00:12:47,483
‐ Cologne, baby!
‐ Alright!
280
00:12:47,516 --> 00:12:50,352
‐ This ain't my cologne.
‐ You smell pretty like mommy.
281
00:12:52,021 --> 00:12:54,323
‐ Soap, please.
‐ Soap, please.
282
00:12:54,356 --> 00:12:56,492
[whirring]
283
00:13:00,496 --> 00:13:01,664
Neesee!
284
00:13:02,699 --> 00:13:04,033
Neesee!
285
00:13:05,635 --> 00:13:07,369
‐ What are you doing?
‐ Oh!
286
00:13:09,238 --> 00:13:10,673
I don't know, Robert, I..
287
00:13:10,707 --> 00:13:13,976
I always hated this carpet,
so I just thought..
288
00:13:14,010 --> 00:13:15,377
No‐no‐no, no, Neesee
289
00:13:15,411 --> 00:13:17,079
this‐this is not your carpet
to hate.
290
00:13:17,113 --> 00:13:19,348
This‐this, this is my carpet.
291
00:13:19,381 --> 00:13:20,650
Not yours, mine.
292
00:13:20,683 --> 00:13:23,019
Oh! Come on, Robert.
293
00:13:23,052 --> 00:13:24,654
We both know you hate
this ugly old thing, too.
294
00:13:24,687 --> 00:13:26,422
Yeah, but that's not
the point, Neesee!
295
00:13:26,455 --> 00:13:28,457
The point is with all
of the things that's going on
296
00:13:28,490 --> 00:13:29,659
in your life,
you feel like my floor
297
00:13:29,692 --> 00:13:32,028
is the thing
that needs fixing?
298
00:13:32,061 --> 00:13:33,462
It was bugging me.
299
00:13:33,495 --> 00:13:36,098
You know what? I'm late
for my meeting, alright?
300
00:13:36,132 --> 00:13:38,234
Just‐just, just,
just put it back, okay?
301
00:13:38,267 --> 00:13:40,637
‐ Oh, Robert, I‐‐
‐ Make it normal.
302
00:13:40,670 --> 00:13:42,404
‐ But I was going to just‐‐
‐ No.
303
00:13:42,438 --> 00:13:43,706
‐ But I was going to make‐‐
‐ No.
304
00:13:43,740 --> 00:13:45,642
‐ Do just a little something‐‐
‐ No!
305
00:13:49,078 --> 00:13:50,279
Normal!
306
00:13:51,714 --> 00:13:54,283
[instrumental music]
307
00:13:56,218 --> 00:13:58,087
So then, Robert says..
308
00:13:58,120 --> 00:14:00,356
"We're about to take you
to the dark side of Hollywood
309
00:14:00,389 --> 00:14:02,391
and I'mma about to
turn on the lights!"
310
00:14:02,424 --> 00:14:04,326
Bang! We hit the cameras
with the flash, right.
311
00:14:04,360 --> 00:14:05,695
Strobes, now hold on.
312
00:14:05,728 --> 00:14:07,296
We pull the camera out
to reveal
313
00:14:07,329 --> 00:14:09,431
Robert standing on top
of the Hollywood sign
314
00:14:09,465 --> 00:14:11,467
in a lightning storm!
315
00:14:11,500 --> 00:14:14,771
Oh! Yes!
Yes, yes, yes, I love it.
316
00:14:14,804 --> 00:14:16,773
I love it.
317
00:14:16,806 --> 00:14:19,608
But instead of lightning,
let's do..
318
00:14:21,210 --> 00:14:23,445
...lightning bugs.
319
00:14:23,479 --> 00:14:26,315
Just saying, little orbs of life
flickering across the screen.
320
00:14:26,348 --> 00:14:28,050
Huh? Huh?
321
00:14:28,084 --> 00:14:29,652
Off the top of my head.
Top of my head.
322
00:14:31,320 --> 00:14:33,355
Okay, but you still like
the concept of the show.
323
00:14:33,389 --> 00:14:36,458
I like the concept of a show,
not this one.
324
00:14:38,227 --> 00:14:39,495
But keep coming at me.
325
00:14:39,528 --> 00:14:42,231
I want you guys
to knock me out.
326
00:14:42,264 --> 00:14:44,366
I mean, bat upside on the head.
Brains on the floor.
327
00:14:44,400 --> 00:14:47,303
Swing, batter, swing. Huh?
What else you got?
328
00:14:47,336 --> 00:14:50,206
‐ Um, we got a lot of material.
‐ Too much. We got too much.
329
00:14:50,239 --> 00:14:51,473
You know, it's just all
in the matter of which one
330
00:14:51,507 --> 00:14:52,675
of these gold bricks
we gonna hit you
331
00:14:52,709 --> 00:14:54,376
on the back of the head with it.
332
00:14:54,410 --> 00:14:56,145
But we need to take a huddle
right quick, okay?
333
00:14:56,178 --> 00:14:57,279
‐ Got it.
‐ Okay.
334
00:14:59,148 --> 00:15:01,651
Beer Factor!
335
00:15:01,684 --> 00:15:03,686
‐ Beer Factor.
‐ We're not pitching that.
336
00:15:03,720 --> 00:15:05,287
I got nothing else, man.
Listen, listen..
337
00:15:05,321 --> 00:15:08,124
‐ We have to make something up.
‐ Okay. Alright.
338
00:15:08,157 --> 00:15:11,560
Okay. You've seen
"The Apprentice," right?
339
00:15:11,593 --> 00:15:14,163
We take a pimp from
Mississippi, right?
340
00:15:14,196 --> 00:15:15,364
‐ 'Hit show. Hit show.'
‐ 'Right?'
341
00:15:15,397 --> 00:15:17,099
And‐and, and a farmer from Ohio
342
00:15:17,133 --> 00:15:18,835
and we put him in a house
together, right?
343
00:15:18,868 --> 00:15:21,603
Yeah, yeah.
And then what happens is..
344
00:15:21,638 --> 00:15:24,473
‐ Have you called the morgues?
‐ We can take him and we can..
345
00:15:24,506 --> 00:15:26,608
‐ We can get him gators, right.
‐ Alligators.
346
00:15:26,643 --> 00:15:29,078
His vocal cords are paralyzed.
347
00:15:29,111 --> 00:15:30,847
I mean, seriously,
has anyone kinda called
348
00:15:30,880 --> 00:15:32,682
you recently and just hung up?
349
00:15:32,715 --> 00:15:34,450
Excuse me. Excuse me, excuse me,
excuse me, excuse me.
350
00:15:34,483 --> 00:15:36,285
We're trying to have
a meeting over here.
351
00:15:36,318 --> 00:15:38,855
Okay, listen,
we are in a lunchbreak
352
00:15:38,888 --> 00:15:40,623
from the Sushi Hut, okay.
353
00:15:40,657 --> 00:15:44,393
So I have exactly 42 minutes
to mend a broken heart.
354
00:15:44,426 --> 00:15:46,729
It doesn't take 42 minutes
to mend a broken heart.
355
00:15:46,763 --> 00:15:47,830
It only takes one.
356
00:15:47,864 --> 00:15:49,766
My man is pulling
the classic gun
357
00:15:49,799 --> 00:15:51,433
and run on you, alright?
358
00:15:53,302 --> 00:15:54,737
‐ What?
‐ He hit it and quit it.
359
00:15:56,372 --> 00:15:58,440
It's true.
Men are not that complicated.
360
00:15:58,474 --> 00:15:59,575
Okay, whatever.
361
00:15:59,608 --> 00:16:01,543
Sometimes,
don't guys, like, pretend
362
00:16:01,577 --> 00:16:03,379
they don't like you
even when they do?
363
00:16:03,412 --> 00:16:04,747
Nope.
364
00:16:04,781 --> 00:16:08,484
‐ Even if he's says‐‐
‐ Hell no.
365
00:16:08,517 --> 00:16:09,819
Yeah, but I knew this one guy
who would tell‐‐
366
00:16:09,852 --> 00:16:11,587
He was lyin'.
367
00:16:11,621 --> 00:16:13,489
‐ But I‐‐
‐ Lying.
368
00:16:13,522 --> 00:16:16,358
Trust me, baby, I wrote
a book on the subject.
369
00:16:16,392 --> 00:16:17,860
‐ Really?
‐ Lying!
370
00:16:19,461 --> 00:16:21,397
‐ That's so depressing.
‐ Look, here.
371
00:16:21,430 --> 00:16:23,299
If you wanna stop attracting
players and dogs
372
00:16:23,332 --> 00:16:25,334
lose the hooker heels.
373
00:16:25,367 --> 00:16:27,737
‐ Wait. Why?
‐ Alright?
374
00:16:27,770 --> 00:16:31,641
Try a boot, alright?
Men love the mystery of a boot.
375
00:16:31,674 --> 00:16:33,910
It's true. You never know
what you're gonna get.
376
00:16:33,943 --> 00:16:36,545
It could be a French pedicure,
it could be a pig foot.
377
00:16:38,715 --> 00:16:41,517
Either way, it's a story
for the poker table.
378
00:16:41,550 --> 00:16:45,187
There you go. So now you can
take your next 41 minutes
379
00:16:45,221 --> 00:16:46,823
and go buy yourself a boot.
380
00:16:46,856 --> 00:16:48,224
Hmm!
381
00:16:54,764 --> 00:16:57,233
Sorry about that, Jeff.
382
00:16:57,266 --> 00:16:59,802
Sorry? No. That was amazing.
383
00:16:59,836 --> 00:17:01,603
I've never seen anything
like that in my life.
384
00:17:01,638 --> 00:17:03,806
I get numbers all the time, man.
385
00:17:03,840 --> 00:17:07,710
No, no, the two of you talking
to women about men like that.
386
00:17:07,744 --> 00:17:10,246
Complete honesty.
Truth, truth.
387
00:17:10,279 --> 00:17:12,281
Yeah. No. I've never seen
anything like that.
388
00:17:13,883 --> 00:17:15,818
And that's our show!
389
00:17:15,852 --> 00:17:17,353
Sold!
390
00:17:17,854 --> 00:17:18,921
Yeah!
391
00:17:19,656 --> 00:17:20,890
What?
392
00:17:23,359 --> 00:17:24,493
[instrumental music]
393
00:17:26,996 --> 00:17:29,932
Hey, Bobby! Daddy just sold
a show. Where you at?
394
00:17:29,966 --> 00:17:31,200
Oh!
395
00:17:32,434 --> 00:17:35,404
‐ Sorry.
‐ Oh!
396
00:17:35,437 --> 00:17:36,706
‐ Where's Bobby?
‐ Save it.
397
00:17:36,739 --> 00:17:38,540
Come on,
I gotta show you something.
398
00:17:44,246 --> 00:17:45,414
Okay?
399
00:17:46,515 --> 00:17:47,516
It's shiny.
400
00:17:49,919 --> 00:17:53,790
But I miss that old ugly thing
we both know I hated.
401
00:17:53,823 --> 00:17:55,692
Um, Tia.
402
00:17:58,661 --> 00:18:01,798
‐ That's cold, Neesee.
‐ Sorry.
403
00:18:01,831 --> 00:18:04,433
But you know something, this is
not about me and Tia, Neesee.
404
00:18:04,466 --> 00:18:06,402
This is about you
coming around here
405
00:18:06,435 --> 00:18:08,738
and turning everything
upside down.
406
00:18:08,771 --> 00:18:10,907
Well, I didn't mean
to complicate things.
407
00:18:10,940 --> 00:18:12,742
Let me tell you something,
Neesee.
408
00:18:12,775 --> 00:18:15,444
When you move into
somebody's house, right
409
00:18:15,477 --> 00:18:18,815
and you rip up the floor,
it complicates things!
410
00:18:22,518 --> 00:18:23,686
I'm sorry, Robert.
411
00:18:25,521 --> 00:18:27,523
What do you want me to do, hmm?
412
00:18:27,556 --> 00:18:30,259
I don't know when I'mma
move back in my home.
413
00:18:30,292 --> 00:18:33,262
I don't know when I can start
catering again.
414
00:18:33,295 --> 00:18:35,497
I don't know anything.
415
00:18:35,531 --> 00:18:37,634
So I fixed the damn floor.
416
00:18:37,667 --> 00:18:40,837
This is not about the floor,
Neesee, don't you get it?
417
00:18:40,870 --> 00:18:42,604
We're not supposed
to be here like this
418
00:18:42,639 --> 00:18:45,607
together, in the same house,
arguing as if we were married.
419
00:18:45,642 --> 00:18:46,909
This is crazy.
420
00:18:46,943 --> 00:18:49,045
Hey, I'm not happy
about this either.
421
00:18:49,078 --> 00:18:50,747
All I wanted
was a normal divorce
422
00:18:50,780 --> 00:18:52,481
where we hate each other
and don't talk.
423
00:18:54,483 --> 00:18:57,053
I don't know why
we can't just do that.
424
00:18:57,086 --> 00:18:59,555
Well, God knows I tried!
425
00:19:03,726 --> 00:19:05,594
‐ We're stuck.
‐ No, you're stuck, Neesee.
426
00:19:05,628 --> 00:19:07,029
No, fool.
427
00:19:08,865 --> 00:19:11,033
We're stuck to the floor.
428
00:19:11,067 --> 00:19:13,035
I guess this part didn't dry.
429
00:19:13,069 --> 00:19:15,037
What are you talking about?
This..
430
00:19:15,071 --> 00:19:17,640
Oh! Oh!
431
00:19:17,674 --> 00:19:21,310
Ooh! Ooh! Ooh! Oh!
432
00:19:21,343 --> 00:19:23,579
‐ Oh!
‐ Okay, okay, okay.
433
00:19:23,612 --> 00:19:25,314
‐ What? Hold. Okay.
‐ Alright.
434
00:19:25,347 --> 00:19:26,515
You're cutting
my circulation off..
435
00:19:26,548 --> 00:19:27,850
Ah!
436
00:19:30,920 --> 00:19:32,922
‐ Okay. Alright, on‐on three.
‐ 'Ah!'
437
00:19:32,955 --> 00:19:35,725
‐ Okay. Okay.
‐ One, two, three.
438
00:19:35,758 --> 00:19:36,859
[grunting]
439
00:19:36,893 --> 00:19:38,628
[groaning]
440
00:19:38,661 --> 00:19:40,863
Get your hand out of there,
Neesee.
441
00:19:40,897 --> 00:19:42,398
‐ Okay.
‐ Okay, you're choking me.
442
00:19:42,431 --> 00:19:43,866
‐ Okay. You're choking me.
‐ I'm sorry.
443
00:19:43,900 --> 00:19:45,567
‐ You're choking me.
‐ Wait. Don't let me fall.
444
00:19:45,601 --> 00:19:47,336
Don't let me fall.
Robert, don't let me fall.
445
00:19:47,369 --> 00:19:48,771
I said.. No!
446
00:19:50,840 --> 00:19:53,109
Alright! Dogpile!
447
00:19:53,142 --> 00:19:55,544
‐ Oh, no, baby! Oh!
‐ No‐no..
448
00:19:55,577 --> 00:19:57,747
[laughing]
449
00:19:59,548 --> 00:20:01,718
This is fun.
450
00:20:01,751 --> 00:20:03,319
What game are we playing?
451
00:20:05,087 --> 00:20:06,956
[both laughing]
452
00:20:11,994 --> 00:20:13,462
[instrumental music]
453
00:20:24,040 --> 00:20:26,408
(Neesee)
'Robert!'
454
00:20:26,442 --> 00:20:27,944
[Neesee screaming]
455
00:20:30,713 --> 00:20:32,548
[theme music]
32609
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