All language subtitles for The League of Gentlemen s03e06.eng

af Afrikaans
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bn Bengali
bs Bosnian
bg Bulgarian
ca Catalan
ceb Cebuano
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
nl Dutch Download
en English
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French
fy Frisian
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hmn Hmong
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
km Khmer
ko Korean
ku Kurdish (Kurmanji)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Lao
la Latin
lv Latvian
lt Lithuanian
lb Luxembourgish
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mn Mongolian
my Myanmar (Burmese)
ne Nepali
no Norwegian
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt Portuguese
pa Punjabi
ro Romanian
ru Russian
sm Samoan
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
st Sesotho
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhala
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
te Telugu
th Thai
tr Turkish
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
or Odia (Oriya)
rw Kinyarwanda
tk Turkmen
tt Tatar
ug Uyghur
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,520 --> 00:00:03,670 ("LEAGUE OF GENTLEMEN" THEME) 2 00:00:40,880 --> 00:00:44,270 (HUMS TUNELESSLY) 3 00:00:48,960 --> 00:00:51,872 (LAUGHS) Top banana! 4 00:00:52,680 --> 00:00:54,830 (SHRIEKS) 5 00:01:02,240 --> 00:01:04,754 - Vinnie! - I'm doing the games! 6 00:01:04,960 --> 00:01:08,270 Never mind the games, dear. We've lost a bag! 7 00:01:08,440 --> 00:01:10,635 - What? - We've lost a bag. 8 00:01:10,800 --> 00:01:14,793 I was upstairs doing the bags, a gust of wind comes along 9 00:01:14,960 --> 00:01:17,030 - and - whoosh! - it's gone! - The bag? 10 00:01:17,200 --> 00:01:20,112 Whoosh! Somebody must have left the window open. 11 00:01:21,480 --> 00:01:23,471 (BOTH) That Meryl! 12 00:01:23,640 --> 00:01:25,995 - What bag was it? - It was pink, I think. 13 00:01:26,160 --> 00:01:28,754 - It's shook me right up. - Are you thirsty? 14 00:01:28,920 --> 00:01:32,117 - No, I don't do Thursdays. - No, dear. Thirsty. Thirsty. 15 00:01:32,280 --> 00:01:35,670 - All right! No need to be rude. - I'm not being rude. 16 00:01:35,840 --> 00:01:38,559 You are. Ooh, I've got stitch. 17 00:01:40,080 --> 00:01:42,389 Anyway, how you getting on with the games? 18 00:01:42,560 --> 00:01:46,997 All right. I've put the top hat from Monopoly in Mouse Trap, 19 00:01:47,160 --> 00:01:50,277 I've put the cage from Mouse Trap in Cluedo, 20 00:01:50,480 --> 00:01:52,869 and I've stuck Professor Plum in Colditz! 21 00:01:53,080 --> 00:01:55,355 - (BOTH CACKLE) - That'll show 'em. 22 00:01:55,520 --> 00:01:59,433 - What about the rules? - All in here. 23 00:01:59,600 --> 00:02:02,637 I'll come early tomorrow, dear, and help with the jigsaws. 24 00:02:02,800 --> 00:02:05,997 - What? A piece out of each? - Yeah. See you tomorrow. 25 00:02:06,200 --> 00:02:08,316 See you tomorrow. 26 00:02:08,480 --> 00:02:10,516 (CACKLES) 27 00:02:16,800 --> 00:02:20,998 Oh! Oh! Reenie! There's the bag! 28 00:02:33,200 --> 00:02:35,430 (SQUISH) 29 00:02:39,120 --> 00:02:41,156 Silly old bag... 30 00:02:41,360 --> 00:02:43,351 (CROAKS) 31 00:02:55,680 --> 00:02:58,877 Vinnie! Vinnie, we've got some stuff! 32 00:02:59,040 --> 00:03:01,349 Clothes, is it? Yeah, it's clothes, dear. 33 00:03:01,520 --> 00:03:04,830 You wanna come and have a look. Nice big bag as well. 34 00:03:05,000 --> 00:03:08,117 Now, what have we got here? Ooh, some gloves. 35 00:03:08,280 --> 00:03:11,511 Some gloves, dear. Got to get a few pence for these. 36 00:03:11,680 --> 00:03:14,194 What else? Ooh, a dress! 37 00:03:14,360 --> 00:03:16,715 You'd like this dress, Vinnie. 38 00:03:16,880 --> 00:03:18,871 Few holes in it, though. 39 00:03:19,040 --> 00:03:21,429 Now, then. What's this in 'ere? 40 00:03:21,600 --> 00:03:24,478 Teeth! Never had teeth before. 41 00:03:24,640 --> 00:03:27,313 Old woman's teeth, Vinnie! 42 00:03:27,480 --> 00:03:30,119 Old woman's teeth. 43 00:03:30,280 --> 00:03:33,795 And a hat. One of those hats that you... 44 00:03:36,520 --> 00:03:38,511 Hat...teeth... 45 00:03:39,880 --> 00:03:42,235 ..dress, gloves... 46 00:03:42,400 --> 00:03:44,960 Oh, Vinnie! 47 00:03:45,120 --> 00:03:47,270 Oh, Vinnie! 48 00:03:48,520 --> 00:03:51,318 It's all good stuff, dear. 49 00:03:51,480 --> 00:03:54,153 It's all good stuff. (SOBS) 50 00:04:01,440 --> 00:04:05,274 They call 'em Disney Classics. Some aren't even a year old. 51 00:04:05,440 --> 00:04:07,635 Shelley, come here. 52 00:04:07,800 --> 00:04:10,792 Tell our new projectionist which is the best dog cartoon. 53 00:04:10,960 --> 00:04:12,951 (ORIENTAL ACCENT) I say "Fox and Hound". 54 00:04:13,120 --> 00:04:15,953 - Tell 'im, Shelley. - "All Dogs Go to Heaven". 55 00:04:16,160 --> 00:04:19,789 Thank you. "All Dogs Go to Heaven." Don Bluth, 1989. 56 00:04:19,960 --> 00:04:22,235 It piddles over your "Fox and Hound". 57 00:04:22,440 --> 00:04:25,273 - But it's good film. - It's all right. 58 00:04:25,440 --> 00:04:27,715 "All Dogs" has Burt Reynolds. 59 00:04:27,920 --> 00:04:30,275 You've got Mickey bloomin' Rooney. I rest my cause. 60 00:04:30,480 --> 00:04:32,596 - I need a word... - You see, 61 00:04:32,760 --> 00:04:36,673 there's nothing you can tell me about dog films. 62 00:04:36,840 --> 00:04:40,515 People used to say, "Kenny, a dog cinema? You're crackers!" 63 00:04:40,680 --> 00:04:43,672 "Where's the variety??" I'll give you flickin' variety. 64 00:04:43,840 --> 00:04:46,354 Just off the top of me 'ead - "Look Who's Talking Now", 65 00:04:46,520 --> 00:04:48,590 "Beethoven's Second", "Zoltan, Hound of Dracula". 66 00:04:48,800 --> 00:04:52,190 As a triple bill, that'd be up there with the "Godfather"s. 67 00:04:52,360 --> 00:04:54,828 - How many were in last Sunday? - 37. 68 00:04:55,000 --> 00:04:58,709 A double bill. "The Shaggy Dog", "The Shaggy DA". 69 00:04:58,880 --> 00:05:01,713 I saw lads wi' shaven heads pissing themselves laughing. 70 00:05:01,920 --> 00:05:04,639 - Boss... - 1976 and fresh as a daisy. 71 00:05:04,800 --> 00:05:07,109 Boss, I've got some news. 72 00:05:07,320 --> 00:05:10,118 What? Don't say they've let me down on "Cujo". 73 00:05:10,320 --> 00:05:12,709 - No. - Thank God for that. 74 00:05:12,880 --> 00:05:16,111 I've got a party of goths coming from Leeds. 75 00:05:16,280 --> 00:05:20,592 - It's Dougal Siepp. - You what? 76 00:05:22,200 --> 00:05:24,395 He's back. 77 00:05:24,560 --> 00:05:26,357 (DOG HOWLS) 78 00:05:29,840 --> 00:05:34,197 Here we go. Now, then... This is where you stand, Keith. 79 00:05:34,360 --> 00:05:36,920 - (CAMP VOICE) Right. - I'll be doing the bags. 80 00:05:37,080 --> 00:05:39,071 Did you have bags at the Spastics', dear? 81 00:05:39,240 --> 00:05:42,118 We did, but it's called Scope now. 82 00:05:42,280 --> 00:05:44,953 - What's that? - You said Spastics'. 83 00:05:45,120 --> 00:05:48,237 - They're Scope. - Oh! Vinnie! 84 00:05:48,600 --> 00:05:52,593 No. So did you work with many bags at the Scope, dear? 85 00:05:52,760 --> 00:05:57,311 One or two. Speaking of bags, I brought in some stuff. 86 00:05:57,480 --> 00:06:00,870 - Charity begins at home. - Lovely. Good stuff, is it? 87 00:06:01,040 --> 00:06:03,952 It's costume jewellery from my am-dram days. 88 00:06:04,120 --> 00:06:06,111 I fell out with the costume designer, 89 00:06:06,280 --> 00:06:08,919 but aren't these so right for Banquo? 90 00:06:09,080 --> 00:06:10,752 - Excuse me? - Yes, dear. 91 00:06:10,920 --> 00:06:12,990 I bought this games compendium last week. 92 00:06:13,160 --> 00:06:17,358 - There's a few pieces missing. - I'll be upstairs, dear. 93 00:06:18,880 --> 00:06:20,950 Keep the bag. 94 00:06:21,880 --> 00:06:25,077 - Sorry, you were saying? - There's some draughts missing. 95 00:06:25,280 --> 00:06:29,319 I've got these buttons from "The Diary of Anne Frank". 96 00:06:29,480 --> 00:06:32,552 I snipped them off a Nazi. They're quite a good match. 97 00:06:32,760 --> 00:06:36,196 - What else? - A counter for Connect Four. 98 00:06:36,400 --> 00:06:41,155 Hmm... Tricky. My ruby brooch should slip down your crack. 99 00:06:42,320 --> 00:06:44,311 OK... 100 00:06:45,160 --> 00:06:47,435 Yeah, and I'm also missing a black queen. 101 00:06:47,640 --> 00:06:50,154 There's no answer to that, is there? 102 00:06:50,320 --> 00:06:53,073 - Use this thimble. - Thanks very much. 103 00:06:53,280 --> 00:06:57,558 - You've been very helpful. - Not at all. See you again. 104 00:06:57,720 --> 00:07:00,792 I'm just glad he had a full set of tiddlywinks. 105 00:07:00,960 --> 00:07:02,393 (PHONE RINGS) 106 00:07:02,560 --> 00:07:04,630 Hello? Keith Drop. 107 00:07:04,800 --> 00:07:06,791 Hello, Eve. How are the costumes? 108 00:07:07,680 --> 00:07:09,955 Right. Oh, you're joking? 109 00:07:10,120 --> 00:07:13,351 Tonsillitis? So who can we get to play the Nazi? 110 00:07:14,360 --> 00:07:17,796 (SHOUTS INCOHERENTLY) Wherez this Anne Fraaa?! 111 00:07:17,960 --> 00:07:22,317 Ah'm a Nazi!! I gunna keel you, Anne Fraaank!! 112 00:07:32,960 --> 00:07:34,757 Good eve... 113 00:07:34,920 --> 00:07:36,911 (BAD AMERICAN ACCENT) Good afternoon. 114 00:07:37,080 --> 00:07:39,469 My name is Dean Tavalouris. 115 00:07:39,640 --> 00:07:44,191 I'm about to go out onto the streets of Royston Vasey 116 00:07:44,360 --> 00:07:48,069 doing my magic and all my tricks. 117 00:07:48,240 --> 00:07:50,231 (WOMAN) Dean, have you fed them fish? 118 00:07:50,400 --> 00:07:52,709 Mam! I'm doin' me programme! 119 00:07:52,920 --> 00:07:56,674 The power of the human mind, madam! 120 00:07:56,840 --> 00:07:58,990 The power of the human mind, sir? 121 00:08:00,840 --> 00:08:02,831 The power of the human mind, sir? 122 00:08:03,000 --> 00:08:05,753 - Eh? - I'm here in Royston Vasey 123 00:08:05,920 --> 00:08:08,070 doing magic for my programme. 124 00:08:08,240 --> 00:08:10,595 Is he talkin' to us. Tell him no. 125 00:08:10,800 --> 00:08:13,997 These are my friends, all 52 of them. 126 00:08:14,200 --> 00:08:16,191 Look, Frank. 127 00:08:16,640 --> 00:08:19,757 - Is this for the telly? - Yes. It's on in the fall. 128 00:08:19,960 --> 00:08:23,316 Now, look at these. All normal, nowt wrong with 'em. 129 00:08:23,480 --> 00:08:26,995 Right. 'Ere, hold me bag. 130 00:08:27,160 --> 00:08:29,151 Now, pick a card, is it? 131 00:08:29,320 --> 00:08:31,311 You won't know it. I thought this up. 132 00:08:31,480 --> 00:08:34,597 - Hurry up. It's freezation. - Thank you, my friend. 133 00:08:34,800 --> 00:08:37,633 Now take a look at this. 134 00:08:37,800 --> 00:08:40,997 Eh, our Jack's got one of these. It's an Instamatic. 135 00:08:41,200 --> 00:08:43,395 Careful! That cost loads. 136 00:08:43,960 --> 00:08:45,996 I said I'd get those Hoover bags. 137 00:08:46,160 --> 00:08:48,435 Oh, aye! Look who it is! 138 00:08:48,600 --> 00:08:51,353 All right, Frank. It's not getting any warmer, is it? 139 00:08:51,520 --> 00:08:54,717 Excuse me. This is a magic camera. 140 00:08:54,880 --> 00:08:57,678 It sees all the thoughts within your 'ead. 141 00:08:57,840 --> 00:08:59,990 (CLICKS AND WHIRRS) 142 00:09:00,920 --> 00:09:03,957 - What's all this, then? - He's doing a conjuring trick. 143 00:09:04,120 --> 00:09:06,714 Oh, aye? Do I have to pick a card? 144 00:09:06,920 --> 00:09:09,912 No, I've already done that. Now... 145 00:09:10,280 --> 00:09:12,271 They look nice, them parsnips. 146 00:09:12,440 --> 00:09:16,115 - Have you tried Binns? - It's Hammonds now. 147 00:09:16,280 --> 00:09:18,589 - Was this your selection? - Eh? 148 00:09:19,360 --> 00:09:21,555 Your card. Was this your card? 149 00:09:21,720 --> 00:09:24,234 Sorry, son. I can't remember. 150 00:09:25,760 --> 00:09:28,638 Was your card the card in the picture? 151 00:09:28,800 --> 00:09:31,678 I couldn't tell you, son. I honestly couldn't say. 152 00:09:31,840 --> 00:09:34,832 - Did you see it? - Come on, Frank. It's bitter. 153 00:09:37,400 --> 00:09:39,391 You take a good picture, Frank. 154 00:09:40,720 --> 00:09:43,473 What is wrong with people round here? 155 00:09:43,640 --> 00:09:45,358 What is wrong with people?! 156 00:09:46,320 --> 00:09:47,958 Here we are. Two teas. 157 00:09:48,120 --> 00:09:50,111 Ooh, thanks. I'm spitting feathers. 158 00:09:50,280 --> 00:09:52,475 Now, how you getting on with the book? 159 00:09:52,640 --> 00:09:55,677 All right. I did it in pencil like you said. 160 00:09:55,840 --> 00:09:59,515 - Now I'm going over it in pen. - That's right. Nice and bold. 161 00:09:59,680 --> 00:10:03,958 Bold and blue! I'll be upstairs if you need me, dear. 162 00:10:04,120 --> 00:10:05,917 Right. 163 00:10:11,880 --> 00:10:13,950 (DOOR JANGLES) 164 00:10:15,440 --> 00:10:17,431 Hello. Sorry to bother you again. 165 00:10:17,640 --> 00:10:20,871 - We're just closing, actually. - It won't take long. 166 00:10:21,040 --> 00:10:24,635 - It's just about this brooch. - Oh, didn't it fit? 167 00:10:24,840 --> 00:10:28,435 It's not that. I wanted to ask where it came from. 168 00:10:28,600 --> 00:10:31,831 - In there. - No, I mean originally. 169 00:10:32,040 --> 00:10:35,157 I don't know. I've just started working here, I'm afraid. 170 00:10:35,360 --> 00:10:38,511 I was under the impression these items were yours. 171 00:10:38,680 --> 00:10:42,229 Yes, well, some of them are. Let's have a look at it. 172 00:10:42,440 --> 00:10:45,352 You see, my wife had a brooch just like that. 173 00:10:45,560 --> 00:10:47,551 - They're very common. - Yes, 174 00:10:47,720 --> 00:10:49,836 but she was wearing it when she went missing. 175 00:10:50,000 --> 00:10:54,278 Look, in this photograph. She's been missing ten months now. 176 00:10:54,880 --> 00:10:58,156 They are very similar, but I'm afraid I can't help you. 177 00:10:58,320 --> 00:11:00,436 May I look through the box? 178 00:11:00,600 --> 00:11:04,309 Go ahead. I'll just be a minute gathering my things. 179 00:11:05,120 --> 00:11:07,156 How long has she been missing now? 180 00:11:07,360 --> 00:11:12,195 Ten months. A lot of women went missing in this area. 181 00:11:12,360 --> 00:11:14,590 Around the time this circus came to town... 182 00:11:29,760 --> 00:11:32,149 (GROWLS) She's my wife...! 183 00:11:34,560 --> 00:11:36,755 Now, what the bloody hell's goin' on? 184 00:11:38,880 --> 00:11:41,394 Dougal Siepp was the assistant manager. 185 00:11:41,560 --> 00:11:44,279 He persuaded Mr Harris to branch out into cat films. 186 00:11:44,480 --> 00:11:47,233 I was a bloody fool. Cat films are shit. 187 00:11:47,440 --> 00:11:50,159 - What about "That Darn Cat"? - Oh, fuck off. 188 00:11:50,320 --> 00:11:52,311 There's not the variety in felines. 189 00:11:52,480 --> 00:11:55,392 But Siepp was a stubborn sod. He wouldn't give way. 190 00:11:55,560 --> 00:11:58,836 Then the rot spread. Films with tenuous links. 191 00:11:59,000 --> 00:12:02,515 He tried to persuade me to put on "Pet Sematary". 192 00:12:02,680 --> 00:12:05,558 I said, "We've got a rule. The mutt's the star." 193 00:12:05,720 --> 00:12:08,029 - What does it say outside? - Dog Cinema. 194 00:12:08,240 --> 00:12:11,596 Thank you. Tell him what was the last straw. 195 00:12:11,800 --> 00:12:13,791 Mr Harris was in hospital. 196 00:12:14,000 --> 00:12:16,912 With bowel cancer. Thank God they caught it early. 197 00:12:17,080 --> 00:12:19,071 I come out, what were he showing? 198 00:12:19,280 --> 00:12:21,748 - "Rock-A-Doodle". - "Rock-A-Flickin'-Doodle"! 199 00:12:21,920 --> 00:12:24,195 I went apeshit. I screamed at him, 200 00:12:24,360 --> 00:12:27,432 "Dougal Siepp, that movie is about a chicken that sings. 201 00:12:27,600 --> 00:12:29,830 "You know what's behind this venture. Clear your desk, 202 00:12:30,000 --> 00:12:32,070 "get your Garfield and get out." 203 00:12:32,240 --> 00:12:35,789 - Audiences were down 40%. - We've clawed our way back. 204 00:12:35,960 --> 00:12:39,032 I've had an article about me in the "Winnipeg Post". 205 00:12:39,200 --> 00:12:41,998 Canada. Think about that. 206 00:12:42,200 --> 00:12:45,510 And it's not 'cause we show films about chickens. 207 00:12:51,360 --> 00:12:53,351 Someone tell me what's going on! 208 00:12:53,520 --> 00:12:56,318 - Where's Keith? - There is no Keith. 209 00:12:56,480 --> 00:13:00,029 - Look at this. - So, who's this Papa Lazarus? 210 00:13:00,200 --> 00:13:02,191 Papa Lazarou. 211 00:13:03,000 --> 00:13:06,595 I wish I knew. He came here last year with that circus. 212 00:13:06,760 --> 00:13:10,833 Wait a minute. I've got a poster for that somewhere. 213 00:13:11,040 --> 00:13:13,918 - Is this it, dear? - Yes! That's the one. 214 00:13:14,120 --> 00:13:16,475 Now, where is she? Where's my wife? 215 00:13:16,680 --> 00:13:19,274 You better talk, you bastard, or I'll call the police! 216 00:13:19,480 --> 00:13:21,471 - No need to be rude, dear! - Talk! 217 00:13:21,640 --> 00:13:23,278 - Kunjar! - What's he say? 218 00:13:23,480 --> 00:13:25,471 (SHOUTS GIBBERISH) 219 00:13:25,640 --> 00:13:29,076 - He's just toying with us. - She speaks French, Meryl. 220 00:13:29,280 --> 00:13:31,748 - Meryl! - Do you know her? 221 00:13:31,920 --> 00:13:36,471 - She ran off with a black man. - Quando siliabo catnip, catnip! 222 00:13:36,680 --> 00:13:40,753 - Let's get the police. - # Meinhor dria drieken 223 00:13:40,920 --> 00:13:43,559 ♪ Drieken dria meinhor... ♪ 224 00:13:50,360 --> 00:13:52,351 Where's Siepp? 225 00:14:02,160 --> 00:14:03,878 (CAT SNARLS) 226 00:14:04,760 --> 00:14:08,594 Kenny Harris. As I live and breathe. 227 00:14:08,800 --> 00:14:11,553 - (DOG GROWLS) - (CAT SNARLS) 228 00:14:14,960 --> 00:14:18,430 Here we go. What is it? 999, is it? 229 00:14:18,640 --> 00:14:20,995 Wait. Let's think about this. 230 00:14:21,160 --> 00:14:25,517 He'll never talk to the police. I might not see my wife again. 231 00:14:25,680 --> 00:14:28,240 What, then? You're not leaving him here. 232 00:14:28,400 --> 00:14:32,632 - I've got to do the book! - He has to lead us to her. 233 00:14:33,920 --> 00:14:37,071 I know. Take him some food up on a tray. 234 00:14:37,280 --> 00:14:39,475 Ooh! What did your last slave die of? 235 00:14:39,640 --> 00:14:43,189 - Leave him a knife and fork. - Hang on! 236 00:14:43,400 --> 00:14:45,709 If we leave him a knife, he'll escape. 237 00:14:45,920 --> 00:14:48,718 Exactly. We let him escape, then we follow him. 238 00:14:49,520 --> 00:14:51,511 You better be quick. 239 00:14:51,680 --> 00:14:53,796 "Countdown" is on in half an hour. 240 00:14:55,400 --> 00:14:57,391 (MIAOWING) 241 00:14:57,560 --> 00:15:00,518 Are you not out of business yet, Kenneth? 242 00:15:00,720 --> 00:15:05,157 Quit carping, Siepp. We do video and DVD rental now. 243 00:15:05,320 --> 00:15:08,915 - Know what my biggest title is? - I'm sure you'll tell me. 244 00:15:09,120 --> 00:15:12,157 "Digby". "Digby - the Biggest Dog in the World." 245 00:15:12,360 --> 00:15:14,715 What did you say about it? Can you remember? 246 00:15:14,920 --> 00:15:17,798 Funnily enough...no. 247 00:15:17,960 --> 00:15:21,794 That it were dated and no one would want to see it. 248 00:15:22,000 --> 00:15:25,276 17 rentals in 22 weeks. Explain that. 249 00:15:25,480 --> 00:15:29,189 Fortunate you're here, Harris. Just in time for the unveiling. 250 00:15:30,720 --> 00:15:33,188 Mr Griffin, would you oblige? 251 00:15:33,360 --> 00:15:37,751 - Bloody Nora! - (ORIENTAL EXCLAMATION) 252 00:15:38,400 --> 00:15:40,595 Bastard's gone live! 253 00:15:46,480 --> 00:15:50,792 (HUMS) Here we are, dear. I brought you some soup. 254 00:15:51,600 --> 00:15:54,990 - Merci. - It's leek and potato. 255 00:15:55,160 --> 00:15:58,038 - Good soup is that. - Kindly undo these bonds! 256 00:15:58,200 --> 00:16:00,191 (SHRIEKS) 257 00:16:00,360 --> 00:16:02,954 I'm afraid I can't do that, Mr Papa Lazarou. 258 00:16:03,120 --> 00:16:07,238 If I undo those bags, you might take this knife 259 00:16:07,400 --> 00:16:11,757 and try and escape through that open window over there. 260 00:16:13,280 --> 00:16:16,352 I am not Papa Lazarou. 261 00:16:16,560 --> 00:16:20,394 Who are you, then? You're not my lovely Keith. 262 00:16:24,680 --> 00:16:28,468 - Why you do this to me, Reenie? - What's that? 263 00:16:28,680 --> 00:16:31,035 (VINNIE'S VOICE) You killed me, Reenie. 264 00:16:31,200 --> 00:16:34,351 You let that red bag fly out the window! 265 00:16:34,520 --> 00:16:37,398 - You're not my friend! - I'm frightened, Reenie. 266 00:16:37,560 --> 00:16:43,192 - Please undo the bags! - You're not my friend! (SOBS) 267 00:16:48,360 --> 00:16:52,831 Checking the lens. Now we are prepared. 268 00:16:53,040 --> 00:16:56,715 - Is this gonna be on the telly? - That is right. In the fall. 269 00:16:56,880 --> 00:16:59,838 - What's your name again? - I am he called Dean. 270 00:17:00,000 --> 00:17:02,958 Dean Tavalouris. 271 00:17:04,440 --> 00:17:07,910 Now, which one of you beautiful daughters of Archimedes 272 00:17:08,080 --> 00:17:10,071 will furnish me with a cigarette? 273 00:17:13,240 --> 00:17:15,800 Just one will be suffice. 274 00:17:15,960 --> 00:17:18,235 May I take the pleasure? 275 00:17:21,880 --> 00:17:26,351 Now I take a cigarette thusly. 276 00:17:30,040 --> 00:17:32,873 (WHEEZES) 277 00:17:33,080 --> 00:17:39,189 Soon it will be but a memory, like smoke in the wind. 278 00:17:39,360 --> 00:17:42,033 If you would shake the magic cloth. 279 00:17:44,200 --> 00:17:46,760 - That's good! - Will you show me? 280 00:17:46,960 --> 00:17:49,554 No, the magician's code forbids me... 281 00:17:49,720 --> 00:17:52,075 (BOTH) Hey! 282 00:17:52,240 --> 00:17:55,789 You two come in here. Check this guy out. 283 00:17:55,960 --> 00:17:58,269 Do you know what this bloke can do? 284 00:17:58,440 --> 00:18:00,670 - It's gonna be on telly. - Go on, then. Show us. 285 00:18:00,840 --> 00:18:03,274 No, the magician's code forbids... 286 00:18:03,440 --> 00:18:05,715 Fuck off. Show us. 287 00:18:05,880 --> 00:18:08,189 - He can make a fag disappear. - Whoo (!) 288 00:18:08,360 --> 00:18:11,716 - Bungo, leave him. - Give him a fag. Go on. 289 00:18:15,040 --> 00:18:17,031 (COUGHS) 290 00:18:17,200 --> 00:18:21,751 (MEEKLY) I take the fag thusly. Soon it will be but a memory. 291 00:18:21,920 --> 00:18:24,480 - (FARTS) - You're mingin'! 292 00:18:24,680 --> 00:18:27,035 Whoa! Where's your hand goin'? 293 00:18:29,840 --> 00:18:32,400 - Is that to put your cock in? - Absolute rubbish. 294 00:18:34,040 --> 00:18:37,510 - Let me show you how it's done. - (GIRLS) Go on! 295 00:18:37,720 --> 00:18:39,790 No! No! No! 296 00:18:47,760 --> 00:18:50,320 Hey, Miggy. Bet this is worth a bit. 297 00:18:50,480 --> 00:18:53,790 Please don't touch it! (SCREAMS) Don't touch it! 298 00:18:55,240 --> 00:18:57,470 (LAUGHTER) 299 00:18:58,000 --> 00:19:00,355 (BABBLES INSANELY) 300 00:19:02,040 --> 00:19:04,679 - Come on. It'll be a laugh. - (GROANS) 301 00:19:07,760 --> 00:19:10,991 I want more than that. Down. That's it. Down. 302 00:19:11,360 --> 00:19:13,920 (GIGGLING) 303 00:19:19,120 --> 00:19:21,156 (WHEEZES) 304 00:19:43,120 --> 00:19:44,519 Oh! 305 00:19:45,760 --> 00:19:48,911 Oh, he's done all his work surfaces in that Corian. 306 00:19:49,120 --> 00:19:50,917 Shh! 307 00:20:00,880 --> 00:20:03,235 What's he done with her? 308 00:20:03,400 --> 00:20:08,269 He's clever. He's put 'em all into piles to bag 'em up. 309 00:20:09,440 --> 00:20:12,796 He's got some good stuff in here. It's brand-new. 310 00:20:14,000 --> 00:20:15,638 Come on. 311 00:20:15,800 --> 00:20:19,634 (MUMBLES TO HERSELF) 312 00:20:45,440 --> 00:20:49,479 He won't get much for these bras. They're all wet. Hee-hee! 313 00:20:49,640 --> 00:20:52,757 The Spastics' will be green when they see this lot. 314 00:20:52,920 --> 00:20:55,480 - (WEEPING) - What's that? 315 00:20:57,120 --> 00:21:01,591 Oh, what's the matter, dear? Are you all right? 316 00:21:09,400 --> 00:21:13,154 Don't cry, dear. I'll look after you. 317 00:21:13,360 --> 00:21:15,396 I'm your friend. 318 00:21:16,640 --> 00:21:19,234 I can't believe you fell for that one! 319 00:21:19,440 --> 00:21:21,829 (SCREAMS) 320 00:21:24,920 --> 00:21:26,512 Hello, Dave. 321 00:21:32,320 --> 00:21:37,314 You see, the thing that people don't realise about make-up 322 00:21:37,480 --> 00:21:40,756 is you can tend to overdo it. 323 00:21:40,920 --> 00:21:43,434 It's much better to have too little 324 00:21:43,600 --> 00:21:45,591 and then add on. 325 00:21:45,760 --> 00:21:48,274 - Try telling your little girl. - Shut up! 326 00:21:49,200 --> 00:21:52,556 I learned my skills from my wives. 327 00:21:52,760 --> 00:21:57,231 Each one of them has something different to offer. 328 00:21:57,400 --> 00:21:59,868 Your wife, for example, 329 00:22:00,040 --> 00:22:03,794 knows a great deal about curling eyelashes. 330 00:22:05,440 --> 00:22:07,908 You didn't know that, did you? 331 00:22:09,040 --> 00:22:11,873 Perhaps you should have paid more attention to her. 332 00:22:12,920 --> 00:22:16,959 - I know I did. - What have you done with her? 333 00:22:17,120 --> 00:22:20,829 You know, I can't even remember if she's alive or dead. Simba? 334 00:22:21,040 --> 00:22:23,713 - Yeah, boss. - Bring me the book of wives. 335 00:22:23,920 --> 00:22:27,276 What? The book? He's not stole the book as well, has he? 336 00:22:27,440 --> 00:22:29,431 - Ooh, Keith the thief! - Shut up! 337 00:22:29,640 --> 00:22:34,111 - Here y'are, boss. - Now, what was my wife's name? 338 00:22:34,280 --> 00:22:37,590 - Katie Morgan. - Dave. 339 00:22:37,880 --> 00:22:41,919 Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave... 340 00:22:43,320 --> 00:22:44,992 Ah... 341 00:22:46,280 --> 00:22:49,033 - Is she alive? - Alive... 342 00:22:49,240 --> 00:22:52,152 in a manner of speaking. 343 00:22:52,320 --> 00:22:55,676 Would you like to see what she looks like now? 344 00:22:55,840 --> 00:23:01,836 No. I think you'd much rather see her in the flesh. 345 00:23:03,040 --> 00:23:05,554 What's happenin'? What's happenin'? 346 00:23:15,000 --> 00:23:19,915 (GRUFF VOICE) Ah, Dave, you are awake. Pleasant dreams? 347 00:23:20,120 --> 00:23:23,749 - Where's my wife? - Tick-Tick. 348 00:23:25,800 --> 00:23:28,155 (SIMBA LAUGHS) 349 00:23:30,800 --> 00:23:35,351 Oh, Dave. Someone to see you, Dave. 350 00:23:41,560 --> 00:23:43,994 - Help me! - Katie?! 351 00:23:44,200 --> 00:23:46,634 - Help me, Brian! - Show him what you can do. 352 00:23:46,840 --> 00:23:48,751 Up! Up! 353 00:23:50,000 --> 00:23:53,231 You're going to be an elephant. 354 00:23:53,440 --> 00:23:55,874 (ALL LAUGH) 355 00:23:59,560 --> 00:24:01,551 (MANIACAL LAUGHTER) 356 00:24:03,440 --> 00:24:07,638 Anybody there? I need to go to the toilet. 357 00:24:18,160 --> 00:24:20,754 (CAMP VOICE) Lovely day, isn't it? 358 00:24:28,120 --> 00:24:30,111 (PHONE RINGS) 359 00:24:32,000 --> 00:24:34,639 Keith Drop. (GRUFF) How are the animals? 360 00:24:35,320 --> 00:24:38,915 So we just need one more wife for the elephant. 361 00:24:42,080 --> 00:24:44,469 (CAMP VOICE) Excuse me. You dropped this. 362 00:24:55,680 --> 00:24:58,240 (KEITH) Oh, God! Are you all right? 363 00:24:59,280 --> 00:25:02,113 - Tony? - Don't try to speak. 364 00:25:04,320 --> 00:25:07,392 If not for that St Christopher, you'd be dead by now. 365 00:25:07,560 --> 00:25:11,997 - It's fate, Tony. - Come on. Back to the shop. 366 00:25:12,200 --> 00:25:14,714 (PAULINE) You saved my life! 367 00:25:14,880 --> 00:25:18,077 - Beauty and the beast. - What's that? 368 00:25:18,240 --> 00:25:20,231 Beauty and the beast. 369 00:25:20,400 --> 00:25:25,599 Hmm... Tell me. (GRUFF) Do you like animals? 370 00:25:27,440 --> 00:25:30,398 Charlie? Charlie? 371 00:25:36,880 --> 00:25:41,396 I just heard a massive noise. I'm gonna find out what it was. 372 00:25:45,600 --> 00:25:48,034 Stay back. Stay back. 373 00:25:48,720 --> 00:25:51,075 What's happened? 374 00:25:52,400 --> 00:25:56,439 - Just tell me what happened. - Will you get out of the way? 375 00:25:58,000 --> 00:25:59,991 - Shit! - (GEOFF) Who's that? 376 00:26:00,160 --> 00:26:02,993 We're tryin' to do a job here. 377 00:26:07,640 --> 00:26:10,791 Bugger off. Show some respect for the dead. 378 00:26:22,200 --> 00:26:24,873 (INAUDIBLE) 379 00:26:29,240 --> 00:26:31,276 You may kiss the bride. 380 00:26:57,320 --> 00:26:59,788 (INAUDIBLE) 381 00:27:09,960 --> 00:27:12,190 (LAUGHTER) 382 00:27:39,280 --> 00:27:41,316 (MOANS) 383 00:27:59,720 --> 00:28:02,075 (INAUDIBLE) 384 00:28:06,520 --> 00:28:08,590 (BABY CRIES) 385 00:28:14,000 --> 00:28:15,956 (BARBARA) My beautiful darlings. Shh! 386 00:28:16,006 --> 00:28:20,556 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 29607

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.