All language subtitles for The Big Bang Theory S10 E08_EN

How much will it hurt?

It's just a tiny skin sample.

You saw me do it to myself.

On a scale of one to ten,
where one is a pebble in your shoe

and ten is the monkey

you thought was your pet
biting your face off.

A two.

Eating a whole Altoid?

Sheldon, if I'm gonna synthesize
a neural network

from our skin cells,
I need to harvest them.

Now, I've done this dozens of times,

but if you're too scared
you don't have to.

No, this is for science.

I can be brave for science.

Thank you.

Oh, jiminy, that's cold!

Just think how happy
you'll be in a few weeks

when I've converted our skin cells
into functional brain cells.

All right, just warn me before you do it.

Okay.

Three, two and we're done.

You tricked me.

You didn't say one.

It didn't hurt, did it? No.

But "three, two and we're done"
is incomplete.

You know those things bother me.

It's like hearing "da-da-da-da-da-da"
without yelling.

Okay, fine, one.

Thank you.

Now yell "Charge"
and we can get out of here.

Oh, my God, I just got it.

Fun onions.

Funyuns.

Hold on.

Is that a wobble?

Yes.

That's definitely a gravitational wobble.

Uh, sorry, I could come back.

Oh, no, it's okay. I just found a wobble.

Oh, do I need a mop?

It's a gravitational wobble.

It could be a sign
of an extrasolar planet

that may contain life
and someday be named after me.

Oh, well, if it has life,
maybe it already has a name, huh?

Yeah, but it's probably
difficult to pronounce.

What is your name?

Rajesh Ramayan Koothrappali.

You think it would be
more difficult than that?

Good point.

And you are?

Oh, Issabella Maria Concepcion.

Oh, well, nice to meet you.

Nice to meet you, too.

You know, I have to say,
based on the candy wrappers

and the bags of junk food I see
in this trash, I thought the person

working here was ten years old.

Oh, please, show me
a ten-year-old who knows

to dip Tootsie Rolls in Nutella.

Bueno, I'm just going
to empty your waste paper basket

and then I'll get out of your way.

Oh, please, allow me.

That's a lot of empty calories.

Thank you.

You're welcome.

Okay, uh, okay,

-I have to go.
-Okay.

Good luck with your space exploration.

Thank you.

Good luck with your future endeavors.

Did it work?

Are they brain cells yet?

If you'd give me a minute, I'll tell you.

Oh, just let me look.

Oh, my goodness!

I see quivering black lines.

Those must be neurons.

Oh, they're so thick and beautiful.

Those are your eyelashes, move.

Well, Sheldon...

I see astrocytes.

Our combined skin cells are now
a primitive neural network.

I have such a profound sense of creation.

I like when I hatched Sea-Monkeys,
except that this is from my DNA,

so this is like Me-Monkeys.

These cells come from both of us.

Yeah, but Us-Monkeys doesn't pop.

Oh, oh, oh, oh, wait!

We-Monkeys, there you go.

Hey.
When can we start running tests on it?

No reason we can't start right now.

What stimulus should we introduce it
to first?

Light, sound, temperature.

Oh, let's expose it to images of me
and you and see who it likes better.

Sheldon, this is a rudimentary
collection of neurons.

I mean, it's remarkable,
but it's still limited in what it can do.

I understand.

She's the mean one, I'm the fun one.

They screwed up
and gave us steamed broccoli.

Oh, no, that's mine.

Really?

The last green thing
I saw you eat was a Skittle.

Well, I can't eat
like a ten-year-old all the time.

You're dating somebody, who is it?

What? What are you talking about?

You only watch what you
eat when you're afraid

you might have to take your shirt off.

No, she's right.

As long as I've known you,
you've always been self-conscious

about your cleavage.

It's because you keep trying
to stick pencils in it.

All right, fine, don't tell us.

There's nothing to tell.

All right.

How's that broccoli?

It's gross but I have to eat it
because I met somebody.

Bam. Thank you.

-What's her name?
-Issabella.

Oh, did you meet her at work?

Yes, in the telescope room.

Oh, so she's an astronomer?

Yes.

Which is why she was
in the telescope room.

Yes, this is all making sense. Good.

Well, that's great, Raj.

You must have so much in common.

So, when do we meet her?

No, no, this is brand-new.

We haven't even been
on a proper date yet.

Okay, well, good luck with it. Thank you.

How come you never eat broccoli?

I'm married,
I don't have to be attractive.

You know, most people don't realize

this technique has actually been around
for a few years.

Still, I can't believe
you can turn ordinary skin cells

into functioning brain cells.

Well, I turned this one
into a functioning boyfriend,

so sky's the limit.

Look, look, here I am
standing next to the incubator.

Here is a microscopic view of the cells.

Look at that, put them in a tiny
Flash T-shirt and it's you.

Yeah, this little guy
can already recognize

electronically transmitted images

20 percent faster than any other
sample in Amy's lab.

I'm running out of ways to act excited.

So, enough about us,
how are things going with you?

Great, the doctor said the baby's head
is facing down now.

Good, you know,
in case the exit isn't clearly marked.

Yeah, I have to say, it is nice to share

this experience with someone
who's on the same journey.

Although right now ours
is testing off the charts

while yours is floating
around in its own waste.

Are you actually comparing my human baby
to your brain in a bowl?

Well, I didn't make you waddle up
four flights of stairs for the heck of it.

You do realize my baby
has functioning organs

and can recognize voices.

Yeah, but ours can recognize
a specific data stream

among background noise.

Mine has a fully developed immune system.

Ours doesn't need
an immune system because it lives

in a state-of-the-art German incubator.

Sheldon, that's enough.

Oh, yeah, no, fine.

Let's just agree that both creations

are special in their own way

and it is foolish
to try and compare them.

Although, we didn't need
to have sex with Howard

for ours, so we win.

This is fun.

I have never cleaned a toilet before.

You're kidding.

No, I grew up with a house
full of servants

and now I have a cleaning lady

who is a lovely woman
who I have great respect for.

It's okay, you're allowed
to have a cleaning lady.

Oh, good, because she also walks my dog,

buys my groceries and cuts my hair.

I think that's called a mommy.

So, forgive me,
forgive me for being nosy,

but is there a wedding ring
under those pretty rubber gloves?

No, not for many years.

Oh, so, you are unencumbered?

Just me and my son.

I love kids, how old is he?

19.

That's a cute age.

They can do so many things.

He's studying to be a lawyer at UCLA.

That's wonderful.

A lawyer, my sister's a lawyer.

Look at that,
we have something in common.

Yeah, I guess we do.

Maybe there are other things
we have in common.

Come dinnertime,
do you enjoy eating food?

Ay, Rajesh, I think you're very sweet

but I work two jobs and I don't
have time for dating.

Yeah, sure. I understand.

Yeah, I'm very busy, too.

Oh, please don't take it personal,
I think you're a very nice man.

I think you're very nice as well.

Thank you for helping me.

Good night, Rajesh.

Oh, yes. Oh, okay.

Good night.

I don't know, maybe it's the fumes
from the urinal cakes,

but I feel like something
is happening between us.

Good night, Rajesh.

Okay. I'll leave.

But just know, every time I come in here,

I'll be thinking of you.

Would you look at that?

The image we gave
it was 45 percent white noise,

and it still managed to reconstruct it.

I've never seen results like this before.

Yeah, we need to stop for
magnets on the way home,

this is going right on the fridge.

Aren't you glad you participated in this?

Oh, I am.

And you realize what the next step is?

Set up a second culture
and try to replicate our results.

Uh, no.

We lock that door,

lower our underpants a little
and make a baby.

Make a baby? What are you talking about?

Clearly the combination
of our DNA is exceptional.

Our child could be the next step
in the evolution of mankind.

We'll be able to get
into any preschool we want!

Sheldon, I'm not ready to have a baby.

Oh, yes, you are! I track your cycle.

For the next 36 hours you're as fertile
as a manure-covered wheat field.

Wow, I can actually feel the egg
crawling its way back up.

I don't understand.

I thought you'd be thrilled
to procreate with me.

Not right now.

I see what's happening here.

You're playing hard to get.

I'm not playing anything.

We're not making a baby today.

Very well.

Oops, how clumsy of me.

You know what? Let me get that.

Hey.

Where are you going?

I...

Did you even look at my bottom?

Welcome.

What is this?

Oh, well, you said you didn't
have time to go out for dinner,

so I thought we could have one right here.

-Oh, Rajesh.
-Oh, come on!

We're in the telescope room!

It'll be like dining under the stars.

You see this, uh, double zero?

When it says 01,
that means it's twinkling.

Sometimes it takes a while.

Rajesh, this is so sweet,
but you know I'm working.

That's why I already cleaned up in here
and all the other rooms in the hall.

Well, I suppose that gives me
a little time.

Oh, please sit!

I tried to cook you
a meal from your homeland.

Oh, really?

You made Cuban food?

That depends do they have
Mexican food in Cuba?

Now, when he said "make a baby""

is it possible he meant out of Legos?

No. He was explicit.

Needlessly and freakishly explicit.

Why does he need a baby?

He's already hairless
and smells like talcum powder.

Could you two really have some sort of
super-intelligent child?

Well, there is a genetic component,
but that doesn't guarantee anything.

That's true. Sheldon's father
once picked a fight with a cactus.

Yeah, but that's just his Earth parents.

We don't know anything about
the ones that sent him here.

Well, we know they were
smart enough to send him away.

Hey, you're talking
about the person I love

and have been avoiding
for the past three hours.

Oh, man.

Sheldon gonna get some.

Well, have fun with whatever nightmare's
behind door number two.

Well, hello.

Hello.

Would you care for a brandy?

I don't think so.

Good choice, it's disgusting.

Sheldon, please stop trying to seduce me.

Who's trying to seduce you?

After a long day I always
turn on smooth jazz

and spray deer musk on my inner thighs.

I thought it smelled
like a petting zoo in here.

Anything you'd like to pet?

Not my hair. There's a lot of goop in it.

Okay, I've had enough.

Amy, come back.

I don't know how to open the oysters.

So, what surprised you the most
when you first came to America?

Well, I suppose how much people care
about Oprah's favorite things.

I thought that, too.

But then I got my first waffle maker
and never questioned her again.

You know, I do have some time off
this Sunday if you'd like to...

Hey! I saw your car...

Oh, sorry. Am I interrupting?

It's okay. I should get back to work.

Hi. Howard Wolowitz.

Oh, Issabella Concepcion.

Oh, yeah, the astronomer.

Raj told us about you.

Hey, free toilet paper!

You told him I was an astronomer?

I understand.

Time to go. No, please don't.

It's okay, Rajesh, I'm a grown woman.

I don't have to waste my time
with someone who's embarrassed by me.

I can keep this, right?

Issabella!

Issabella, wait, wait, let me explain.

If you are embarrassed by what I do,
why did you pursue me?

I'm sorry.

Honestly, I didn't think
your job would bother me,

but I guess it did.

And I hate myself for that.

But there's a lot of things about me
that would totally embarrass you.

I doubt that.

Well, prepare to be mortified.

I let my dog eat food out of my mouth,

not because she likes it
but because I do.

Also, I know they're pretty,
but I'm scared of butterflies.

Sorry, just passing through.

I think this fell off your cart.

Come on. What do you say?

Let me make it up to you.

You're very persistent.

It's my one move.

Okay.

This Sunday night, you may take me
to dinner at a nice restaurant.

-Great. Where would you like to go?
-Your choice.

It can be Pakistani food, if you like.

Excuse me, but I'm Indian.

And now you know how it feels.

So, were you turned on even a little bit?

It was like being hit on
by Rat Pack Pee-wee Herman.

I'm sorry, is that a yes?

No!

Amy,

I didn't want it to come to this.

But you have left me no choice
but to employ the most passionate,

seductive dance known to man.

The flamenco.

For God's sake, you're ridiculous.

You guys are aroused, right?

That was a close one.