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1
00:00:04,487 --> 00:00:05,976
It's called
a Christmas tree, Tammy.
2
00:00:06,026 --> 00:00:08,198
Or in Germany,
a Tannenbaum.
3
00:00:08,327 --> 00:00:10,001
I know what it's called,
Big Sauce.
4
00:00:10,066 --> 00:00:11,762
I just haven't seen one
in a long time.
5
00:00:11,827 --> 00:00:13,755
Don't they have
Christmas trees in prison?
6
00:00:13,820 --> 00:00:15,878
No, they kind of frown on joy.
7
00:00:16,640 --> 00:00:18,893
We're glad you're with
us this year, honey.
8
00:00:19,019 --> 00:00:20,338
Hey, since everyone's here,
9
00:00:20,403 --> 00:00:22,038
how about we draw names
for Secret Santa?
10
00:00:22,189 --> 00:00:24,591
Huh. I didn't think ol'
"socks and a candle"
11
00:00:24,640 --> 00:00:26,234
would be kick-starting it
this year.
12
00:00:26,299 --> 00:00:28,106
You said you liked them.
13
00:00:28,171 --> 00:00:30,190
And that was my gift to you.
14
00:00:30,381 --> 00:00:31,473
Hey, I got news for you.
15
00:00:31,538 --> 00:00:33,831
This year, I am winning
Secret Santa.
16
00:00:34,003 --> 00:00:35,153
Not a competition.
17
00:00:35,218 --> 00:00:36,340
Marjorie's right.
18
00:00:36,405 --> 00:00:38,616
It's an expression of
our love for each other...
19
00:00:38,696 --> 00:00:40,602
that Christy
always loses.
20
00:00:42,259 --> 00:00:44,159
Can we at least
up the limit?
21
00:00:44,276 --> 00:00:45,906
I mean, $25?
22
00:00:45,971 --> 00:00:48,617
What am I supposed to buy y'all,
a bag of dirt?
23
00:00:48,686 --> 00:00:51,370
Ooh, 25 bucks,
that's a little steep for me.
24
00:00:51,435 --> 00:00:52,761
No, that's just
a ceiling, Tammy.
25
00:00:52,826 --> 00:00:55,736
You can even make something.
Like venison stew?
26
00:00:56,288 --> 00:00:57,339
Sure.
27
00:00:57,417 --> 00:00:58,496
Ooh! Stew it is.
28
00:00:58,561 --> 00:01:00,244
Oh! Secret,
secret!
29
00:01:01,036 --> 00:01:04,033
Lord, I'm getting Bambi
in a bowl for Christmas.
30
00:01:04,327 --> 00:01:06,027
All right, everyone.
31
00:01:06,092 --> 00:01:08,511
Please pick with one hand,
eyes closed.
32
00:01:08,576 --> 00:01:09,746
If you choose your own name,
33
00:01:09,811 --> 00:01:11,916
- you must...
- We know the rules, Wendy.
34
00:01:11,992 --> 00:01:13,972
Do we? 'Cause last
year you picked
35
00:01:14,037 --> 00:01:15,613
your own name and
gave yourself cash.
36
00:01:15,678 --> 00:01:16,784
I know what I like.
37
00:01:16,849 --> 00:01:18,325
Hint: I'd like it again.
38
00:01:18,889 --> 00:01:20,123
Ugh.
39
00:01:20,369 --> 00:01:22,830
You do know whoever you
picked is in the room?
40
00:01:23,381 --> 00:01:25,902
Well, "ugh" isn't
always a bad thing.
41
00:01:25,967 --> 00:01:28,315
Ugh, that's a lovely sweater.
42
00:01:29,014 --> 00:01:31,294
Damn it, I wanted Bonnie.
Who's got Bonnie?
43
00:01:31,359 --> 00:01:32,807
Merry Christmas.
44
00:01:36,834 --> 00:01:39,620
Any chance we could,
uh, 86 the venison stew?
45
00:01:39,685 --> 00:01:41,580
Oh, sure.
Where do you stand on elk?
46
00:01:41,717 --> 00:01:42,808
Hey. Hey, hey.
47
00:01:42,873 --> 00:01:43,894
No requests.
48
00:01:43,959 --> 00:01:45,949
The point is to use
your imagination
49
00:01:46,014 --> 00:01:48,588
and think about the dear friend
you're buying a gift for.
50
00:01:48,883 --> 00:01:50,209
Ugh.
51
00:02:03,764 --> 00:02:05,574
*MOM*
Season 06 Episode 11
52
00:02:05,639 --> 00:02:07,611
Episode Title :
"Foot Powder and Five Feet of Vodka"
53
00:02:09,936 --> 00:02:11,090
Son of a bitch.
54
00:02:11,155 --> 00:02:13,338
There's the Plunkett
Christmas spirit.
55
00:02:13,805 --> 00:02:15,668
I'm in Secret Santa hell.
56
00:02:15,733 --> 00:02:17,877
Who'd you get?
I'm not telling.
57
00:02:18,248 --> 00:02:19,447
Look at me.
58
00:02:21,858 --> 00:02:23,233
Wendy.
59
00:02:24,139 --> 00:02:25,365
How do you do that?
60
00:02:25,430 --> 00:02:28,599
That brief alien abduction
left me with some powers.
61
00:02:29,280 --> 00:02:30,582
It's embarrassing.
62
00:02:30,647 --> 00:02:32,324
We've been friends
with Wendy for years
63
00:02:32,389 --> 00:02:33,995
and I only know
three things about her.
64
00:02:34,139 --> 00:02:36,572
She's a nurse,
she's five foot three...
65
00:02:37,711 --> 00:02:39,018
Two things.
66
00:02:39,780 --> 00:02:41,285
Not to rub it in,
but I got blessed
67
00:02:41,350 --> 00:02:42,791
by the Secret Santa gods.
68
00:02:42,905 --> 00:02:44,035
You got Marjorie?
69
00:02:44,100 --> 00:02:45,502
- Can we trade?
- No way.
70
00:02:45,937 --> 00:02:47,379
In fact...
71
00:02:47,516 --> 00:02:48,940
"Cat pillow.
72
00:02:50,045 --> 00:02:51,304
"Add to cart.
73
00:02:51,369 --> 00:02:53,643
Confirm."
Ah, she'll be here Tuesday.
74
00:02:54,638 --> 00:02:57,030
No, you tell the driver
it was supposed to be
75
00:02:57,095 --> 00:02:59,425
three cases of tequila, not six.
76
00:02:59,490 --> 00:03:01,205
That's more than enough.
77
00:03:01,374 --> 00:03:02,420
Morning.
78
00:03:02,587 --> 00:03:04,519
Amazing. I hear
the word "tequila"
79
00:03:04,584 --> 00:03:06,363
and I immediately
want chips and salsa
80
00:03:06,428 --> 00:03:07,642
and to take my
clothes off.
81
00:03:07,858 --> 00:03:09,589
I hear "tequila"
and I want heroin.
82
00:03:09,654 --> 00:03:11,430
Isn't it funny
how our brains work?
83
00:03:13,401 --> 00:03:15,410
Oh, just a heads-up,
I got to get a deposit check
84
00:03:15,475 --> 00:03:16,574
to the wedding band.
85
00:03:16,639 --> 00:03:17,914
Yeah, well, you know
where the book is.
86
00:03:17,979 --> 00:03:19,574
You sign my name better
than I do, anyway.
87
00:03:19,639 --> 00:03:22,168
Yeah, but I feel dirty
when I don't ask first.
88
00:03:22,233 --> 00:03:23,714
Not really.
89
00:03:23,991 --> 00:03:25,097
All right, I'm out.
90
00:03:25,162 --> 00:03:26,567
Okay, honey.
Go get people drunk.
91
00:03:26,632 --> 00:03:29,440
And you continue to be
strangely cool with that.
92
00:03:31,323 --> 00:03:33,379
Hey. Real quick,
Christy and I were talking.
93
00:03:33,444 --> 00:03:34,754
Do you want to go out
for Christmas Eve
94
00:03:34,819 --> 00:03:36,596
or do you want to do it
here family style?
95
00:03:36,826 --> 00:03:38,783
Oh, yeah. About that...
96
00:03:38,905 --> 00:03:41,044
Tell me you're not working
Christmas Eve.
97
00:03:41,109 --> 00:03:43,505
I'm sorry,
it's a big night for bars.
98
00:03:43,686 --> 00:03:46,044
People are depressed
'cause they don't have families.
99
00:03:46,109 --> 00:03:48,229
Others are depressed
'cause they do.
100
00:03:48,963 --> 00:03:51,761
Plus, the Raiders are on
and that'll depress everyone.
101
00:03:51,826 --> 00:03:53,918
But you're welcome to join in
on the festivities.
102
00:03:53,983 --> 00:03:55,416
Great, so my choices are
103
00:03:55,481 --> 00:03:57,496
spend Christmas Eve
with my kid or in a bar.
104
00:03:57,561 --> 00:03:59,072
Nothing ever changes.
105
00:04:01,473 --> 00:04:03,270
You got your parole officer
a Christmas present?
106
00:04:03,335 --> 00:04:04,673
Oh, yeah. Juan's
been great.
107
00:04:04,738 --> 00:04:06,386
I got him a bottle
of aftershave.
108
00:04:06,451 --> 00:04:09,627
Eight bucks and it comes
with foot powder.
109
00:04:10,717 --> 00:04:13,051
Okay, let's get started.
110
00:04:13,217 --> 00:04:14,605
That's not Juan.
111
00:04:14,670 --> 00:04:16,272
Which one of
you is Tammy?
112
00:04:16,338 --> 00:04:17,943
Me.And who are you?
113
00:04:18,008 --> 00:04:20,110
I'm her ride; Juan's cool
with me hanging out.
114
00:04:20,175 --> 00:04:21,652
Juan's been reassigned.
115
00:04:21,717 --> 00:04:23,454
And I'm not cool.
116
00:04:24,381 --> 00:04:26,007
Wait, Juan's out?
117
00:04:26,072 --> 00:04:27,566
And this is how I'm
hearing about it?
118
00:04:27,631 --> 00:04:29,751
That's a kick in
the lady pants.
119
00:04:30,248 --> 00:04:33,291
I'm Eve Ferguson,
I'm in charge of your case.
120
00:04:33,404 --> 00:04:34,769
You can wait in the hallway.
121
00:04:34,834 --> 00:04:36,349
Oh. Okay.
122
00:04:36,427 --> 00:04:37,744
Guess you're
on your own.
123
00:04:38,021 --> 00:04:40,033
I'll be close.O-Okay.
124
00:04:40,365 --> 00:04:41,420
What is that?
125
00:04:41,485 --> 00:04:43,558
Oh, just some aftershave
for Juan.
126
00:04:43,623 --> 00:04:46,392
Which you are very welcome
to have.
127
00:04:46,489 --> 00:04:47,765
For your fella.
128
00:04:47,830 --> 00:04:49,115
Or your lady.
129
00:04:49,180 --> 00:04:52,119
Or yourself if you like
to smell like the sea.
130
00:04:53,578 --> 00:04:56,166
It comes with
foot powder... Oh.Stop talking.
131
00:04:58,501 --> 00:05:00,936
Okay, I see you have
a place to live
132
00:05:01,001 --> 00:05:02,825
and you're in a 12-step program.
133
00:05:02,895 --> 00:05:04,540
I don't see a job here.
You working?
134
00:05:04,791 --> 00:05:05,908
Uh, well, I...
135
00:05:05,973 --> 00:05:08,581
Handyman.
The bathroom's this way?
136
00:05:08,982 --> 00:05:10,931
Yeah, I've done
some handyman jobs.
137
00:05:11,084 --> 00:05:13,316
Uh, I don't see any pay stubs.
138
00:05:13,381 --> 00:05:14,550
No, it's more
of a barter situation.
139
00:05:14,615 --> 00:05:16,089
Trading the work
for food or rent.
140
00:05:16,154 --> 00:05:19,439
I did some plumbing
for Bonnie's fiancé at his bar.
141
00:05:19,646 --> 00:05:21,673
He's in a wheelchair,
if that helps.
142
00:05:22,868 --> 00:05:24,173
It doesn't.
143
00:05:24,441 --> 00:05:26,603
I'm gonna need some proof
of employment
144
00:05:26,668 --> 00:05:28,853
or I'm gonna be forced
to revoke your parole.
145
00:05:29,459 --> 00:05:31,167
Wait, what? Are you serious?
146
00:05:31,232 --> 00:05:33,245
Yes, and I'm gonna need it
by next Monday.
147
00:05:33,310 --> 00:05:34,550
That's Christmas Eve.
148
00:05:34,615 --> 00:05:36,423
Otherwise known as Monday.
149
00:05:37,435 --> 00:05:38,925
Knock, knock.
150
00:05:38,990 --> 00:05:40,745
I just lost a dollar
in the vending machine.
151
00:05:40,810 --> 00:05:42,009
Who do I see about that?
152
00:05:42,074 --> 00:05:43,994
I'll take the dollar
or the Sprite.
153
00:05:46,293 --> 00:05:47,590
You need any help?
154
00:05:47,841 --> 00:05:48,960
You offering?
155
00:05:49,025 --> 00:05:50,728
No, but I can put the word out.
156
00:05:51,927 --> 00:05:53,095
What are you doing?
157
00:05:53,193 --> 00:05:55,423
I cracked the Christmas code.
158
00:05:55,502 --> 00:05:58,104
I tracked down Wendy's second
cousin in Staten Island
159
00:05:58,169 --> 00:06:00,668
who put me in touch
with one of her aunts in Newark.
160
00:06:00,733 --> 00:06:02,487
By the way,
there is a solid chance
161
00:06:02,552 --> 00:06:05,666
that one side of Wendy's family
is pretty mobbed up.
162
00:06:05,915 --> 00:06:08,188
Maybe I shouldn't be mean
to her anymore.
163
00:06:08,253 --> 00:06:11,353
Yeah, I'd hate to find you
frozen in a meat truck.
164
00:06:11,763 --> 00:06:14,134
Been there.
It's not fun.
165
00:06:15,136 --> 00:06:16,417
So what are you making?
166
00:06:16,482 --> 00:06:17,761
Wendy's grandmother
used to make
167
00:06:17,826 --> 00:06:19,986
these peppermint meringue
cookies every Christmas.
168
00:06:20,051 --> 00:06:22,337
She's dead, I'm not,
bam.
169
00:06:22,532 --> 00:06:25,462
Who's your Secret Santa
now, bitch?
170
00:06:26,466 --> 00:06:29,853
Impressive. It's no cat pillow,
but impressive.
171
00:06:30,021 --> 00:06:31,831
Any luck finding Tammy a job?
172
00:06:31,896 --> 00:06:33,690
Not yet. She didn't finish
high school,
173
00:06:33,755 --> 00:06:36,097
she hasn't worked in years,
she's not good with people.
174
00:06:36,502 --> 00:06:38,572
How the hell did Iget a job?
175
00:06:38,781 --> 00:06:40,986
Hey, where's our cookie sheet?
176
00:06:41,178 --> 00:06:44,264
Oh, sorry, I put it under my car
to catch the oil.
177
00:06:44,335 --> 00:06:46,845
Our good towels aren't doing
the trick anymore?
178
00:06:46,962 --> 00:06:49,167
Adam's got some fancy cookie
sheets at his apartment.
179
00:06:49,232 --> 00:06:51,347
I'll get you his keys.
Adam bakes cookies?
180
00:06:51,412 --> 00:06:53,464
No. They've got old girlfriend
written all over them.
181
00:06:53,529 --> 00:06:55,378
In fact, after you're done,
throw them away.
182
00:06:55,443 --> 00:06:57,353
Oh, and grab a couple
of his good towels.
183
00:07:07,111 --> 00:07:08,822
He's so clean.
184
00:07:09,089 --> 00:07:11,064
How can he marry my mother?
185
00:07:14,959 --> 00:07:17,595
Uh, hello? Aah!
186
00:07:18,253 --> 00:07:19,969
You know, if you really
wanted to hurt me,
187
00:07:20,034 --> 00:07:21,994
there's knives
right behind you.
188
00:07:22,901 --> 00:07:25,525
Yeah, yeah.
That would've made more sense.
189
00:07:26,091 --> 00:07:28,347
Uh... who are you?
190
00:07:28,412 --> 00:07:31,291
Daniel.
I'm renting this place for a month.
191
00:07:31,580 --> 00:07:33,796
- You are?
- Yeah, Airbnb.
192
00:07:34,162 --> 00:07:35,432
Who are you?
193
00:07:35,611 --> 00:07:38,534
Christy.
Adam's my mom's fiancé.
194
00:07:38,599 --> 00:07:41,611
I came by to borrow
his baking sheets.
195
00:07:41,693 --> 00:07:43,237
I'm making
Christmas cookies,
196
00:07:43,302 --> 00:07:44,787
it's a Secret Santa thing.
Stop me
197
00:07:44,852 --> 00:07:46,509
when you have
enough information.
198
00:07:46,881 --> 00:07:49,041
Well, I can't say no
to Secret Santa.
199
00:07:49,183 --> 00:07:50,474
Thanks.
200
00:07:52,916 --> 00:07:54,439
Maybe I could
201
00:07:54,670 --> 00:07:56,823
come back and bring you
some cookies,
202
00:07:56,888 --> 00:07:58,269
if you're into that
kind of thing.
203
00:07:58,334 --> 00:07:59,505
I'd love that.
204
00:07:59,879 --> 00:08:01,494
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
205
00:08:01,636 --> 00:08:04,572
Oh, but my boyfriend's
gluten-free.
206
00:08:05,504 --> 00:08:06,834
Uh-huh.
207
00:08:07,293 --> 00:08:11,369
Well, then, since we have no
future, get your own cookies.
208
00:08:12,535 --> 00:08:14,158
Merry Christmas.
209
00:08:15,959 --> 00:08:19,073
♪ You know Dasher and Sampson ♪
210
00:08:19,138 --> 00:08:23,486
♪ And Connor and... Gibson. ♪
211
00:08:23,855 --> 00:08:25,923
Eh, maybe
I don't know them.
212
00:08:28,763 --> 00:08:30,121
How'd it go?
213
00:08:30,186 --> 00:08:31,487
It was a hard no.
214
00:08:31,552 --> 00:08:34,486
Apparently,
I'm not Macy's material.
215
00:08:34,640 --> 00:08:36,636
I'm sorry.
Did you return my blouse?
216
00:08:36,701 --> 00:08:38,277
Oh, yeah. Store credit.
217
00:08:38,342 --> 00:08:39,484
What?
218
00:08:39,580 --> 00:08:41,421
No cash refunds
after six months.
219
00:08:41,486 --> 00:08:42,744
That's Macy's policy.
220
00:08:42,898 --> 00:08:44,712
See what they're missing?
221
00:08:45,891 --> 00:08:47,711
You want to try
Pottery Barn?
222
00:08:47,966 --> 00:08:49,478
Why bother?
223
00:08:49,552 --> 00:08:52,814
I'm an ex-con in my 50s
with no job experience.
224
00:08:52,903 --> 00:08:54,144
Who's gonna hire me?
225
00:08:54,209 --> 00:08:55,941
Maybe we're aiming
a little too high.
226
00:08:56,068 --> 00:08:58,017
My Spanx agree.
227
00:08:59,115 --> 00:09:01,619
Desperate times call
for desperate measures.
228
00:09:01,865 --> 00:09:03,798
Truck stop hooker?
229
00:09:04,829 --> 00:09:07,331
I was thinking flipping burgers
in a paper hat.
230
00:09:07,396 --> 00:09:09,395
Ugh, so degrading.
231
00:09:17,553 --> 00:09:19,377
Hello, vodka.
232
00:09:19,568 --> 00:09:22,962
Do you go to meetings five days
a week to get over me?
233
00:09:26,724 --> 00:09:28,151
- Hey.
- Oh.
234
00:09:28,216 --> 00:09:30,228
Hey.
What brings you down here?
235
00:09:30,396 --> 00:09:33,156
I needed cookie sheets
and my mom said you had some.
236
00:09:33,221 --> 00:09:35,370
Oh, yeah, an old girlfriend
left some at my place
237
00:09:35,435 --> 00:09:36,603
before she went crazy.
238
00:09:36,709 --> 00:09:38,814
So you have a type.
239
00:09:39,013 --> 00:09:41,478
Yeah, apparently.
I'll bring them over tonight.
240
00:09:41,560 --> 00:09:43,986
Too late.
Got them myself.
241
00:09:44,799 --> 00:09:47,572
And met the guy
renting your apartment.
242
00:09:47,857 --> 00:09:49,126
Oh, hoh.
. Huh.
243
00:09:49,237 --> 00:09:51,604
Yeah. You didn't tell
your mom, did you?
244
00:09:51,669 --> 00:09:55,447
No. I recognize sneaky behavior
when I see it.
245
00:09:55,896 --> 00:09:57,845
So what's going on, Sneak?
246
00:09:58,498 --> 00:10:01,619
Okay, contrary
to what you may see here,
247
00:10:01,982 --> 00:10:04,908
this bar is not
exactly trending.
248
00:10:06,560 --> 00:10:07,830
Oh, my God.
249
00:10:07,917 --> 00:10:10,092
You're open right now?
250
00:10:11,838 --> 00:10:13,951
This is the lunch rush.
251
00:10:15,158 --> 00:10:16,010
I'm sorry.
252
00:10:16,088 --> 00:10:19,201
Eh. It's not a disaster.
253
00:10:19,354 --> 00:10:20,593
I didn't say it was.
254
00:10:20,658 --> 00:10:22,154
I'm talking to myself.
255
00:10:23,080 --> 00:10:24,554
The nights are slow,
256
00:10:24,619 --> 00:10:27,443
the days are... this.
257
00:10:27,884 --> 00:10:29,529
I have no credit
with my vendors,
258
00:10:29,594 --> 00:10:31,085
so I have to pay
everything up front,
259
00:10:31,150 --> 00:10:32,648
including buying uniforms
260
00:10:32,713 --> 00:10:35,514
for the health inspector's
son's Little League team.
261
00:10:35,635 --> 00:10:37,701
The Barrelworks Pirates.
262
00:10:37,833 --> 00:10:39,440
They're one and six.
263
00:10:40,150 --> 00:10:43,334
So you rent your place
and stay with us, all good.
264
00:10:43,806 --> 00:10:45,366
But why didn't you
tell my mom?
265
00:10:45,431 --> 00:10:47,102
'Cause I love her
and I'm gonna marry her,
266
00:10:47,167 --> 00:10:49,170
but I'm still
kind of afraid of her.
267
00:10:49,767 --> 00:10:51,707
Yeah, and just
a little heads up,
268
00:10:51,772 --> 00:10:53,675
that never goes away.
269
00:10:53,740 --> 00:10:56,082
Any chance we can
keep this between us?
270
00:10:56,681 --> 00:10:59,434
Aw, a Christmas lie.
271
00:10:59,549 --> 00:11:01,740
- Now we really are family.
- Yeah.
272
00:11:05,704 --> 00:11:07,158
You did good, Bonnie.
273
00:11:07,223 --> 00:11:08,338
- I'm proud of you.
- No.
274
00:11:08,403 --> 00:11:10,204
I don't think Taco Willy's
is a career,
275
00:11:10,269 --> 00:11:12,021
but it'll keep Tammy
out of jail.
276
00:11:12,363 --> 00:11:13,947
I get that we're
being supportive,
277
00:11:14,012 --> 00:11:16,373
but we're not really
eating here, right?
278
00:11:16,928 --> 00:11:19,380
Why?
I love this place.
279
00:11:19,583 --> 00:11:22,685
♪ Home of the ten-inch taco. ♪
280
00:11:23,008 --> 00:11:26,177
God, there's so much
wrong with that.
281
00:11:27,335 --> 00:11:29,249
Welcome to Taco Willy's,
home of the...
282
00:11:29,314 --> 00:11:30,369
Hey!
283
00:11:30,486 --> 00:11:31,926
What are you guys
doing here?
284
00:11:31,991 --> 00:11:33,304
Just showing
a little support.
285
00:11:33,369 --> 00:11:35,964
Love the sombrero.
Very jaunty.
286
00:11:36,029 --> 00:11:38,335
Thanks.
A group of high school kids
287
00:11:38,400 --> 00:11:39,718
just bagged on me
pretty good,
288
00:11:39,783 --> 00:11:42,318
so I forgot to include
their utensils.
289
00:11:43,080 --> 00:11:44,499
So, you liking
the job?
290
00:11:44,564 --> 00:11:47,616
I'm loving it.
No one here knows I was in prison.
291
00:11:47,681 --> 00:11:50,263
I'm just Tammy.
From London.
292
00:11:51,888 --> 00:11:54,638
Ooh, the manager's giving me
the hairy eyeball, order something.
293
00:11:54,748 --> 00:11:56,273
I'll have
the ten-inch taco.
294
00:11:56,338 --> 00:11:58,257
All right, mild or en fuego?
295
00:11:58,322 --> 00:12:00,865
Uh, what the heck, en fuego
me.
296
00:12:01,634 --> 00:12:04,716
You know what? Just give us
a-a number one, a number four,
297
00:12:04,834 --> 00:12:08,724
an eight, and the aforementioned
ten inches of hot magic.
298
00:12:09,355 --> 00:12:11,171
And diet sodas
all around.
299
00:12:11,236 --> 00:12:13,171
Coming right up.
That's an uno,
300
00:12:13,236 --> 00:12:14,839
a quatro, and an ocho.
301
00:12:14,904 --> 00:12:17,013
I'm learning Spanish here, too.
302
00:12:17,120 --> 00:12:19,365
All right, that'll be $21.58.
303
00:12:20,220 --> 00:12:21,698
Only $21?
304
00:12:21,780 --> 00:12:23,974
One of those things
had shrimp in it.
305
00:12:25,317 --> 00:12:29,085
You guys, thank you so much
for visiting me at my job.
306
00:12:29,150 --> 00:12:32,849
And on behalf
of Taco Willy's, gracias.
307
00:12:36,943 --> 00:12:39,507
Wow, these cookies
are a slam dunk.
308
00:12:39,679 --> 00:12:42,271
Oh, yeah? Want to see
a slammier dunk?
309
00:12:42,448 --> 00:12:45,349
Check out this
cookie jar. Look.
310
00:12:45,494 --> 00:12:48,154
It's a bear that's a nurse.
311
00:12:48,349 --> 00:12:50,865
It's so tacky.
She'll love it.
312
00:12:53,655 --> 00:12:55,010
Hello?
313
00:12:55,088 --> 00:12:57,240
Hi, Mark.
Did you get my check?
314
00:12:58,193 --> 00:12:59,661
Well, that's weird.
315
00:12:59,846 --> 00:13:02,068
Yeah, I-I'll take care
of that right away.
316
00:13:02,222 --> 00:13:04,279
Yeah, thanks. Bye.
317
00:13:05,072 --> 00:13:06,351
What's going on?
318
00:13:06,416 --> 00:13:09,287
The check Adam gave me
for our wedding band bounced.
319
00:13:09,713 --> 00:13:12,912
Checks bounce all the time.
Especially at Christmas.
320
00:13:13,070 --> 00:13:14,873
Doesn't mean anything's wrong.
321
00:13:18,127 --> 00:13:19,283
Huh.
322
00:13:19,736 --> 00:13:22,732
All right, better get
wrapping on this.
323
00:13:22,841 --> 00:13:24,577
Unusual shape,
could be tricky.
324
00:13:24,642 --> 00:13:26,045
Hold it.
325
00:13:26,517 --> 00:13:27,627
What do you know?
326
00:13:27,692 --> 00:13:30,193
- Nothing.
- Look at me.
327
00:13:31,388 --> 00:13:33,208
Adam's having money trouble
at the bar.
328
00:13:33,309 --> 00:13:35,255
How do you know?
329
00:13:35,502 --> 00:13:37,472
He's renting out his apartment
for extra money.
330
00:13:37,537 --> 00:13:39,241
What? Why didn't
he tell me?
331
00:13:39,306 --> 00:13:41,107
I don't know.
332
00:13:43,024 --> 00:13:45,316
He's afraid of you.
You're a scary person.
333
00:13:45,381 --> 00:13:46,887
Did he really say that?
334
00:13:46,952 --> 00:13:49,251
Stop it, that's all you're
getting out of me.
335
00:13:50,739 --> 00:13:53,990
Damn it. Your powers are strong
during the holidays.
336
00:13:57,703 --> 00:13:59,740
- Hey, there she is.
- We need to talk.
337
00:13:59,904 --> 00:14:03,213
Wow, Christy couldn't even
last a day.
338
00:14:03,720 --> 00:14:07,312
Don't blame her, she's weak.
How bad is it?
339
00:14:07,627 --> 00:14:09,560
It's not that bad.
340
00:14:10,722 --> 00:14:12,267
It's bad.
341
00:14:12,836 --> 00:14:14,510
So why have you
been lying to me?
342
00:14:14,575 --> 00:14:16,905
I wasn't lying,
I was just protecting you.
343
00:14:16,970 --> 00:14:19,569
I mean, you didn't need to know
I'm losing eight grand a month.
344
00:14:19,634 --> 00:14:21,784
- Eight grand a month?!
- What the...
345
00:14:21,849 --> 00:14:23,848
No, no, don't be scary.
346
00:14:27,531 --> 00:14:28,731
You know what?
347
00:14:28,844 --> 00:14:31,177
I don't even care
about the money.
348
00:14:31,301 --> 00:14:33,265
I care about you.
I care about us.
349
00:14:33,330 --> 00:14:34,974
I mean, what kind of marriage
are we gonna have
350
00:14:35,039 --> 00:14:36,694
if we don't share
the good and the bad?
351
00:14:36,759 --> 00:14:39,068
I know.
I-It's just...
352
00:14:39,416 --> 00:14:41,390
I'm a guy who rode a
snowboard off a cliff
353
00:14:41,455 --> 00:14:44,584
and thisfeels like the
stupidest thing I ever did.
354
00:14:45,596 --> 00:14:48,327
Okay, walk me through
the worst-case scenario here.
355
00:14:48,392 --> 00:14:51,848
It's 3:00 a.m., you can't sleep
because you're seeing...
356
00:14:51,913 --> 00:14:53,064
what?
357
00:14:53,142 --> 00:14:54,417
Well, the bar goes under.
358
00:14:54,482 --> 00:14:56,733
- And?
- I'm completely humiliated.
359
00:14:56,798 --> 00:14:58,476
- And?
- I've lost everything.
360
00:14:58,541 --> 00:14:59,937
Okay, but you haven't
lost everything,
361
00:15:00,002 --> 00:15:01,701
because I'm still
here with you.
362
00:15:01,869 --> 00:15:03,127
Even if I'm broke?
363
00:15:03,192 --> 00:15:04,679
Babe, I do broke
better than anyone.
364
00:15:04,744 --> 00:15:07,265
I got through
1991 on $11.
365
00:15:08,800 --> 00:15:10,646
So no more secrets, okay?
366
00:15:10,829 --> 00:15:12,178
You got to bring
this stuff to me.
367
00:15:12,243 --> 00:15:15,708
It's called... intimacy, and
I'm told it's very important.
368
00:15:17,562 --> 00:15:19,842
Customers, customers,
go, go, go.
369
00:15:19,907 --> 00:15:21,686
Welcome to
AJ's Barrelworks.
370
00:15:21,751 --> 00:15:25,224
We have a very special beer
today, two for $8,000.
371
00:15:29,175 --> 00:15:31,045
Okay, we have time
for one more share.
372
00:15:31,110 --> 00:15:33,608
- Tammy, alcoholic.
- Hi, Tammy.
373
00:15:33,673 --> 00:15:35,710
Make that
unemployed alcoholic.
374
00:15:35,954 --> 00:15:37,868
What? What happened?
375
00:15:37,933 --> 00:15:39,382
Everything was going
pretty good,
376
00:15:39,447 --> 00:15:42,621
and then this homeless guy walks
up to the drive-through window.
377
00:15:42,814 --> 00:15:45,574
He's only got a dollar, but
big-hearted Tammy hooks him up
378
00:15:45,639 --> 00:15:48,327
with a Loco Loco Meal
and a 48-ounce Mountain Dew.
379
00:15:48,392 --> 00:15:50,247
I mean, it's Christmas Eve.
380
00:15:50,352 --> 00:15:51,404
Leave it to me
381
00:15:51,469 --> 00:15:53,537
to get fired for trying
to do something nice.
382
00:15:54,462 --> 00:15:57,077
So now I got to go
to my parole officer
383
00:15:57,142 --> 00:16:00,575
with no job and nothing to
keep her from sending me back.
384
00:16:02,697 --> 00:16:04,098
Aw, hell...
385
00:16:04,723 --> 00:16:06,656
maybe that's best.
386
00:16:06,721 --> 00:16:09,037
I mean, if I can't keep
a job at a taco stand,
387
00:16:09,102 --> 00:16:11,418
there's no way
I'm staying out of jail.
388
00:16:13,534 --> 00:16:16,380
Anyway, I just wanted to say
thanks to you guys
389
00:16:16,445 --> 00:16:18,724
for being so welcoming
to me here
390
00:16:18,789 --> 00:16:21,567
and... being such great friends.
391
00:16:22,445 --> 00:16:24,051
I'm gonna miss you.
392
00:16:27,727 --> 00:16:29,987
So you don't currently
have a job?
393
00:16:30,136 --> 00:16:31,731
No, ma'am, I do not.
394
00:16:32,024 --> 00:16:34,263
Well, you're not leaving me
much choice here.
395
00:16:34,328 --> 00:16:36,740
You've been out eight weeks,
no proof of employment.
396
00:16:36,805 --> 00:16:37,842
I don't know how
I'm gonna
397
00:16:37,907 --> 00:16:39,404
- be able...
- Is it too late? May we speak?
398
00:16:39,469 --> 00:16:40,710
What is going on here?
399
00:16:40,775 --> 00:16:43,279
We are character witnesses
for Tammy Diffendorf.
400
00:16:43,344 --> 00:16:44,524
Counselor.
401
00:16:44,613 --> 00:16:47,185
Actually, I'm not
really a lawyer yet....Just talk.
402
00:16:47,250 --> 00:16:49,657
In the short time we have known
Tammy Diffendorf,
403
00:16:49,722 --> 00:16:52,139
she has proven herself
to be a reliable
404
00:16:52,204 --> 00:16:54,512
and law-abiding member
of our community.
405
00:16:54,627 --> 00:16:56,771
She has joined
a 12-step program
406
00:16:56,836 --> 00:16:58,416
and everyone here
is willing to vouch for her...
407
00:16:58,481 --> 00:16:59,570
Okay, stop.
408
00:16:59,767 --> 00:17:02,266
Okay? This is not
about character,
409
00:17:02,331 --> 00:17:04,904
it's about employment,
and there's nothing I can do.
410
00:17:04,969 --> 00:17:07,621
Well, that is ridiculous.
I want to talk to your manager.
411
00:17:09,839 --> 00:17:11,825
This isn't Neiman's.
412
00:17:12,524 --> 00:17:13,800
Oh.
413
00:17:14,167 --> 00:17:17,029
I'm sorry, but if she
does not have a job,
414
00:17:17,094 --> 00:17:18,803
she'll goes back to prison.
415
00:17:18,868 --> 00:17:21,128
Okay? That's all
there is to it.
416
00:17:21,532 --> 00:17:23,197
She does have a job.
417
00:17:23,262 --> 00:17:25,654
I need my porch painted. $300.
418
00:17:25,719 --> 00:17:28,327
And I need my gutters
cleaned out. $100.
419
00:17:28,567 --> 00:17:30,623
And I've got a big house.
Come over two times a week
420
00:17:30,688 --> 00:17:32,668
and we'll find
something wrong with it.
421
00:17:34,758 --> 00:17:37,578
Now, these have to be real jobs.
422
00:17:37,643 --> 00:17:40,686
I need to see invoices
and copies of checks.
423
00:17:40,819 --> 00:17:42,839
You'll get them.
We'll get her licensed,
424
00:17:42,904 --> 00:17:45,050
put together a website,
get her business cards.
425
00:17:45,115 --> 00:17:46,918
Tammy's Handys.
426
00:17:47,746 --> 00:17:49,543
We'll work on the name.
427
00:17:51,973 --> 00:17:56,170
I can't believe you guys are
doing this. Thank you so much.
428
00:17:56,235 --> 00:17:58,750
So this is good, right?
I don't have to go back to prison?
429
00:17:59,157 --> 00:18:00,826
I'll see you next Monday.
430
00:18:00,891 --> 00:18:02,435
- No, that's New Year's Eve.
- Take the win.
431
00:18:02,500 --> 00:18:04,020
Oh, yeah,
Monday, Monday.
432
00:18:11,157 --> 00:18:12,586
Nice!
433
00:18:12,965 --> 00:18:15,176
Okay, Gus, go mingle.
434
00:18:17,574 --> 00:18:19,356
Nice crowd
for a Christmas Eve.
435
00:18:19,421 --> 00:18:22,840
Right? I guess.
Oh, what the hell do I know?
436
00:18:23,173 --> 00:18:26,864
Hey, I thought of a way
to take a little stress off you.
437
00:18:27,399 --> 00:18:30,153
I'd love to,
but I'm kind of busy.
438
00:18:30,321 --> 00:18:32,407
Not that, you dumbass.
439
00:18:32,547 --> 00:18:35,127
I'm thinking maybe
we kick the wedding bells
440
00:18:35,192 --> 00:18:37,022
down the road a notch.
441
00:18:37,829 --> 00:18:39,138
You want to put the wedding off?
442
00:18:39,203 --> 00:18:40,585
Not forever, it's gonna happen,
443
00:18:40,650 --> 00:18:42,146
but all the money
we're spending on that
444
00:18:42,211 --> 00:18:43,785
could be put into this.
445
00:18:45,422 --> 00:18:46,797
You sure?
446
00:18:46,985 --> 00:18:49,840
Merry Christmas,
I'm not marrying you.
447
00:18:52,467 --> 00:18:55,293
I think my acid reflux
just went away.
448
00:18:55,788 --> 00:18:58,114
I love you.
449
00:18:58,294 --> 00:19:00,404
Hey, Bonnie,
you're missing all the fun.
450
00:19:00,469 --> 00:19:01,988
- I'll be right back.
- All right.
451
00:19:03,951 --> 00:19:05,471
Wow, nice jacket.
452
00:19:05,666 --> 00:19:06,832
Jill gave it to me.
453
00:19:06,903 --> 00:19:09,778
She said it was $25
and I believe her.
454
00:19:12,022 --> 00:19:15,731
I love it, Bonnie.
It's perrrr-fect.
455
00:19:15,852 --> 00:19:18,176
Please stop
saying that.
456
00:19:19,000 --> 00:19:21,332
My turn.
Get ready.
457
00:19:21,615 --> 00:19:25,418
Oh! A nurse cookie jar.
458
00:19:25,774 --> 00:19:26,933
Thank you.
459
00:19:27,165 --> 00:19:28,637
Wait, look inside.
460
00:19:29,821 --> 00:19:31,756
And cookies,
yum.
461
00:19:31,961 --> 00:19:33,520
Not just cookies.
462
00:19:33,649 --> 00:19:36,037
Those are your grandmother's
famous peppermint meringues
463
00:19:36,102 --> 00:19:37,248
she only made
at Christmas.
464
00:19:37,313 --> 00:19:39,006
My grandmother
never made cookies.
465
00:19:39,071 --> 00:19:41,679
She was a drunk
who shot off her own toe.
466
00:19:42,961 --> 00:19:45,839
Well, your cousin Dominic
in Newark begs to differ.
467
00:19:45,904 --> 00:19:47,957
I don't have
a cousin Dominic.
468
00:19:48,196 --> 00:19:49,528
What are you talking about?
469
00:19:49,692 --> 00:19:52,431
I found your whole mobbed-up
family on Facebook.
470
00:19:52,517 --> 00:19:54,653
Waste management?
Wink, wink.
471
00:19:55,188 --> 00:19:57,121
You got the wrong Wendy Harris,
472
00:19:57,211 --> 00:19:58,381
but thank you.
473
00:19:58,446 --> 00:20:00,231
It was really thoughtful.
474
00:20:00,688 --> 00:20:02,072
Do yourself a favor and never
475
00:20:02,137 --> 00:20:04,004
talk about that side
of my family again.
476
00:20:07,771 --> 00:20:09,191
Open mine,
open mine.
477
00:20:09,256 --> 00:20:11,884
Ooh, I wonder
who it's from.
478
00:20:13,951 --> 00:20:16,439
Are You There, God?
It's Me, Margaret.
479
00:20:16,896 --> 00:20:19,049
Remember? You would
hide it under your mattress
480
00:20:19,114 --> 00:20:20,713
and we would read it
to each other every night.
481
00:20:20,778 --> 00:20:23,481
Tammy,
I loved this book.
482
00:20:23,546 --> 00:20:24,713
Good job, honey.
483
00:20:24,778 --> 00:20:26,771
Yeah, you really
nailed Secret Santa.
484
00:20:27,583 --> 00:20:29,005
Oh, Jill,
485
00:20:29,083 --> 00:20:30,551
they left the price tag
on this.
486
00:20:30,616 --> 00:20:31,640
I know.
487
00:20:31,718 --> 00:20:33,448
Captioned by Media Access Group
at WGBH access.wgbh.org
488
00:20:33,513 --> 00:20:35,548
Sync corrections by srjanapala
35303
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