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1
00:00:07,447 --> 00:00:09,608
[Dice] Your aunt, she like brown?
2
00:00:09,609 --> 00:00:12,461
[Carmen] I'm pretty
sure she can't even see.
3
00:00:12,462 --> 00:00:14,603
So, on what basis do we
know she's gonna like the chair?
4
00:00:14,604 --> 00:00:16,575
That's why I don't think it really
matters which one we get.
5
00:00:16,576 --> 00:00:19,398
I like it. Let's find a salesman.
6
00:00:19,399 --> 00:00:20,519
Okay.
7
00:00:20,520 --> 00:00:22,481
- Excuse me?
- Oh, hey there. What's up?
8
00:00:22,482 --> 00:00:24,513
We're thinking about
this chair over here.
9
00:00:24,514 --> 00:00:26,425
Can you tell me a little about it?
10
00:00:26,426 --> 00:00:28,627
- Hold on a second.
- I mean, does it tell...
11
00:00:28,628 --> 00:00:30,579
I know who you are. You're the Dice Man!
12
00:00:30,580 --> 00:00:32,431
Yeah, how you doing?
13
00:00:32,432 --> 00:00:33,592
Dice Man! [laughs]
14
00:00:33,593 --> 00:00:35,474
No, I-I got to say, I don't know
15
00:00:35,475 --> 00:00:36,555
if this chair's fancy enough for you.
16
00:00:36,556 --> 00:00:38,477
I mean, I'm sure Mr. Andrew Dice Clay
17
00:00:38,478 --> 00:00:40,589
wants the most
expensive chair in the store.
18
00:00:40,590 --> 00:00:44,453
Let me stop you there. The
chair is not for me, okay?
19
00:00:44,454 --> 00:00:46,495
- It's for her aunt, so...
- Say something funny.
20
00:00:46,496 --> 00:00:48,457
You know what, I think we're
just gonna look around, okay?
21
00:00:48,458 --> 00:00:49,528
All right. I'll see you later.
22
00:00:49,529 --> 00:00:51,580
- Really?
- Really what?
23
00:00:51,581 --> 00:00:52,631
We're gonna see each other later?
24
00:00:52,632 --> 00:00:54,583
You're kidding me, right?
25
00:00:54,584 --> 00:00:56,485
No.
26
00:00:56,486 --> 00:00:57,646
Okay, it was great to meet you.
27
00:00:57,647 --> 00:00:58,627
Bye!
28
00:00:58,628 --> 00:01:01,440
Yeah. I-I'll see you later.
29
00:01:01,441 --> 00:01:02,571
Look, we don't need help.
30
00:01:02,572 --> 00:01:04,473
We just need to buy a fucking chair.
31
00:01:04,474 --> 00:01:05,574
I can't walk in a
fucking furniture store...
32
00:01:05,575 --> 00:01:06,635
Sorry! Hi.
33
00:01:06,636 --> 00:01:09,628
Sorry about what happened back there.
34
00:01:09,629 --> 00:01:11,660
Where's your bodyguard?
35
00:01:11,661 --> 00:01:13,502
I'm his bodyguard.
36
00:01:13,503 --> 00:01:14,623
You're his bodyguard?
37
00:01:14,624 --> 00:01:17,446
Look, pal, I know you
got some kind of idea
38
00:01:17,447 --> 00:01:19,658
about who I am in your
head, but things aren't like that.
39
00:01:19,659 --> 00:01:22,652
Yeah. But still, you
shouldn't be out here all alone.
40
00:01:24,504 --> 00:01:25,594
I should be your bodyguard.
41
00:01:25,595 --> 00:01:27,586
You should be my bodyguard?
42
00:01:27,587 --> 00:01:29,468
I should be your bodyguard.
43
00:01:29,469 --> 00:01:31,510
Why? To protect me from people like you?
44
00:01:31,511 --> 00:01:33,472
Look, how about we fight?
45
00:01:33,473 --> 00:01:34,523
- What?
- There's no one around.
46
00:01:34,524 --> 00:01:35,624
I'm the manager. We
can do it right here.
47
00:01:35,625 --> 00:01:37,556
Look, I don't need any fights, okay?
48
00:01:37,557 --> 00:01:39,528
I don't want to fight with anybody.
49
00:01:39,529 --> 00:01:41,520
I just want to buy a
fucking chair. That's it.
50
00:01:41,521 --> 00:01:42,681
Okay, look, I-it doesn't
have to be a fight.
51
00:01:42,682 --> 00:01:44,683
It could be a wrestling match.
52
00:01:44,684 --> 00:01:46,705
If I pin you, then I
get to be your bodyguard.
53
00:01:46,706 --> 00:01:49,488
If you pin me, I'll give you a chair.
54
00:01:49,489 --> 00:01:51,530
I don't need a free fucking chair.
55
00:01:51,531 --> 00:01:54,543
Listen, pal, I've had my ass kicked
56
00:01:54,544 --> 00:01:56,595
by some of the toughest
guys you'd ever meet,
57
00:01:56,596 --> 00:01:58,557
and you're not one of those guys, okay?
58
00:01:58,558 --> 00:02:00,609
So do yourself a favor while you can
59
00:02:00,610 --> 00:02:02,641
and just walk the fuck away!
60
00:02:02,642 --> 00:02:03,702
Oh, let's go.
61
00:02:03,703 --> 00:02:05,554
Let's do it, you fucking asshole.
62
00:02:05,555 --> 00:02:07,536
- Oh, you stupid fuck!
- Come on, you pussy!
63
00:02:07,537 --> 00:02:08,647
What time's your aunt's party?
64
00:02:08,648 --> 00:02:11,570
We have time. Go ahead. Kick his ass.
65
00:02:11,571 --> 00:02:13,623
[Rock music plays]
66
00:02:22,602 --> 00:02:23,732
Oh!
67
00:02:23,733 --> 00:02:27,577
[Crowd chanting "Dice!]
68
00:02:29,539 --> 00:02:31,581
Top of the world, ma.
69
00:02:36,349 --> 00:02:41,316
Synced and corrected by VitoSilans
- www.Addic7ed.com -
70
00:02:41,317 --> 00:02:42,751
[Carmen] What do you want
me to say, Andrew?
71
00:02:42,752 --> 00:02:45,544
You haven't been
performing, and we're broke.
72
00:02:45,545 --> 00:02:47,766
I'll get back on stage, and I'll fix it.
73
00:02:47,767 --> 00:02:50,609
And besides, I got a meeting today.
74
00:02:50,610 --> 00:02:51,650
You have a meeting? With Marvin?
75
00:02:51,651 --> 00:02:52,651
Yeah, with Marvin.
76
00:02:52,652 --> 00:02:53,762
About a gig?
77
00:02:53,763 --> 00:02:56,655
I don't know. I haven't
met with him yet.
78
00:02:56,656 --> 00:02:58,717
I'm telling you,
Andrew, without this alimony,
79
00:02:58,718 --> 00:03:00,699
we wouldn't be able to pay for our cars.
80
00:03:00,700 --> 00:03:03,572
What are you talking about, alimony?
81
00:03:03,573 --> 00:03:05,584
- Yeah, alimony.
- You still get alimony?
82
00:03:05,585 --> 00:03:07,636
Well, we're not
married, so duh, I get alimony.
83
00:03:07,637 --> 00:03:09,628
What'd you think this
check was every month?
84
00:03:09,629 --> 00:03:10,789
I don't care if we go homeless,
85
00:03:10,790 --> 00:03:12,711
I'm not taking another guy's money.
86
00:03:12,712 --> 00:03:14,593
Well, it's the law.
87
00:03:14,594 --> 00:03:17,746
Unless, you know, you
want to get married.
88
00:03:17,747 --> 00:03:18,797
Come on, that's not even the point.
89
00:03:18,798 --> 00:03:20,669
What are you doing over here?
90
00:03:20,670 --> 00:03:22,671
All right. Well, until
then, he pays for the cars.
91
00:03:22,672 --> 00:03:25,804
Wait a minute. Dr.
Lowenstein is paying for my Denali?
92
00:03:25,805 --> 00:03:28,657
$538.58 a month.
93
00:03:28,658 --> 00:03:31,590
No man should ever pay for
another man's Denali.
94
00:03:31,591 --> 00:03:32,762
But he is.
95
00:03:35,585 --> 00:03:37,696
All right. That's good.
96
00:03:37,697 --> 00:03:40,609
Because guess what, you
got to drive me to my meeting.
97
00:03:40,610 --> 00:03:41,720
Your car doesn't work?
98
00:03:41,721 --> 00:03:44,723
As far as I'm concerned,
I don't own a car anymore.
99
00:03:44,724 --> 00:03:47,636
So get your keys. I'll
meet you at the front.
100
00:03:47,637 --> 00:03:50,719
Call Milkshake. He'll drive you.
101
00:03:50,720 --> 00:03:53,692
102
00:03:53,693 --> 00:03:56,745
What are you doing writing?
103
00:03:56,746 --> 00:03:58,827
What are you writing
while you're driving?
104
00:03:58,828 --> 00:04:00,779
I'm letting people know where I am.
105
00:04:00,780 --> 00:04:02,631
What people?
106
00:04:02,632 --> 00:04:03,702
I'm your only person.
107
00:04:03,703 --> 00:04:04,793
Other than me, you have no people.
108
00:04:04,794 --> 00:04:06,635
I got people. I got friends.
109
00:04:06,636 --> 00:04:08,667
That right?
110
00:04:08,668 --> 00:04:10,769
You think I'm a boring person?
111
00:04:10,770 --> 00:04:12,681
Well, there's some people
112
00:04:12,682 --> 00:04:13,842
that think you're a
little boring, that's all.
113
00:04:13,843 --> 00:04:16,755
And what have you ever
done that's so exciting?
114
00:04:16,756 --> 00:04:19,698
No, nothing. What have
I ever done, right?
115
00:04:19,699 --> 00:04:22,721
Let's start with being an
international superstar.
116
00:04:22,722 --> 00:04:27,686
Bringing Madison Square Garden
to a decibel level of 12.6, .2,
117
00:04:27,687 --> 00:04:29,688
something like that, they told me.
118
00:04:29,689 --> 00:04:31,800
Hundreds and hundreds of millions
119
00:04:31,801 --> 00:04:34,743
of fucking people coming to see me.
120
00:04:34,744 --> 00:04:36,695
I think that's a... hey.
121
00:04:36,696 --> 00:04:37,877
Hey, I didn't even tell you this.
122
00:04:37,878 --> 00:04:40,689
Recently, I'm not even fucking around,
123
00:04:40,690 --> 00:04:42,691
they took one of my jackets.
124
00:04:42,692 --> 00:04:44,823
It's in the New Brunswick Hall of Fame.
125
00:04:44,824 --> 00:04:48,758
New Brunswick Hall of Fame is
gonna take one of your jackets?
126
00:04:50,720 --> 00:04:52,802
What do you got against New Brunswick?
127
00:04:53,793 --> 00:04:55,764
[Milkshake] What are
you gonna say to this guy?
128
00:04:55,765 --> 00:04:57,826
It's not your job to know
what I'm gonna say to him.
129
00:04:57,827 --> 00:04:59,688
It's your job to have my back.
130
00:04:59,689 --> 00:05:00,839
Well, am I... am I
acting as your driver,
131
00:05:00,840 --> 00:05:02,681
or am I acting as your bodyguard?
132
00:05:02,682 --> 00:05:03,812
What's the fucking difference?
133
00:05:03,813 --> 00:05:06,906
Well, I'd like to know
what my role is, that's all.
134
00:05:06,907 --> 00:05:09,708
Just keep your eyes
open. That's your role.
135
00:05:09,709 --> 00:05:10,779
That's your role.
136
00:05:10,780 --> 00:05:11,860
It affects what I get paid.
137
00:05:11,861 --> 00:05:13,702
What do you mean what you get paid?
138
00:05:13,703 --> 00:05:14,763
I employed you on a trial basis.
139
00:05:14,764 --> 00:05:15,824
This ain't about money.
140
00:05:15,825 --> 00:05:17,786
You ate half the candy in the car
141
00:05:17,787 --> 00:05:19,718
just coming over here, and
you're asking me for money?
142
00:05:19,719 --> 00:05:20,920
You get other things.
143
00:05:20,921 --> 00:05:22,791
You get full access to me.
144
00:05:22,792 --> 00:05:23,852
You're my best friend. I
got full access to you.
145
00:05:23,853 --> 00:05:25,234
All right. Big shot. Everybody's
a big shot.
146
00:05:25,351 --> 00:05:26,412
Can I help you?
147
00:05:26,413 --> 00:05:28,757
Yeah, I'm here to
see, uh, Doc Lowenstein.
148
00:05:28,758 --> 00:05:30,759
- Do you have an appointment?
- No.
149
00:05:30,760 --> 00:05:33,712
- Are you a new patient?
- No.
150
00:05:33,713 --> 00:05:35,915
Have you seen a dermatologist before?
151
00:05:35,916 --> 00:05:39,879
I suggest you just do what the man says.
152
00:05:39,880 --> 00:05:41,820
What... what are you doing?
153
00:05:41,821 --> 00:05:42,912
I'm keeping my eyes open.
154
00:05:42,913 --> 00:05:44,753
How is that keeping your eyes open?
155
00:05:44,754 --> 00:05:46,835
I don't know.
156
00:05:46,836 --> 00:05:48,808
Let me check with the doctor.
157
00:05:50,871 --> 00:05:53,953
This is some setup
you got over here, huh?
158
00:05:53,954 --> 00:05:55,854
[Lowenstein] Thanks.
159
00:05:55,855 --> 00:05:57,846
You got... you got to
get, like, them brackets
160
00:05:57,847 --> 00:05:59,879
that you can stick,
like, the chicks' feet through.
161
00:05:59,880 --> 00:06:02,751
Oh, I'm a
dermatologist. We don't have those.
162
00:06:02,752 --> 00:06:03,943
- [Chuckles]
- No, no, I know.
163
00:06:03,944 --> 00:06:05,804
Well, great to see you, Dice.
164
00:06:05,805 --> 00:06:07,776
Bit of a surprise, but, uh...
165
00:06:07,777 --> 00:06:08,908
So, how is Carmie doing these days?
166
00:06:08,909 --> 00:06:10,809
"Carmie."
167
00:06:10,810 --> 00:06:11,901
What kind of shoes are those?
168
00:06:11,902 --> 00:06:13,852
Oh, these are the Vibram Barefoot
169
00:06:13,853 --> 00:06:15,834
Sport Trek Five-Finger sandal.
170
00:06:15,835 --> 00:06:16,946
They were designed for nature walks,
171
00:06:16,947 --> 00:06:18,908
but they serve me
well in the office here.
172
00:06:18,909 --> 00:06:20,759
Yeah, I get it.
173
00:06:20,760 --> 00:06:21,790
[Chuckles] Oh.
174
00:06:21,791 --> 00:06:23,842
Will you excuse me one moment?
175
00:06:23,843 --> 00:06:28,757
Don't ever tell anybody Carmen
was married to such a tiny man.
176
00:06:28,758 --> 00:06:29,838
He is small.
177
00:06:29,839 --> 00:06:31,810
All right. Sorry about that.
178
00:06:31,811 --> 00:06:33,772
[Chuckles] So, what can I help you with?
179
00:06:33,773 --> 00:06:35,453
I don't want to take
up a lot of your time,
180
00:06:35,455 --> 00:06:36,719
but, uh, you know, we want you
181
00:06:36,816 --> 00:06:39,808
to stop sending the alimony payments.
182
00:06:39,809 --> 00:06:40,910
- The alimony.
- Yeah.
183
00:06:40,911 --> 00:06:41,981
- To Carmen.
- Yeah.
184
00:06:41,982 --> 00:06:43,953
- These are Carmen's wishes?
- Yeah.
185
00:06:43,954 --> 00:06:46,876
Well, I'm sorry, but I
don't think I can do that.
186
00:06:46,877 --> 00:06:47,997
It would be against the law.
187
00:06:47,998 --> 00:06:49,949
He's a tiny man, but he plays hardball.
188
00:06:49,950 --> 00:06:52,781
It's not like that. I'm
just not allowed to stop
189
00:06:52,782 --> 00:06:53,923
unless... did you two get married?
190
00:06:53,924 --> 00:06:56,825
Uh... uh, not the way you'd think.
191
00:06:56,826 --> 00:06:57,836
Like, a little different.
192
00:06:57,837 --> 00:06:58,847
That's not the point.
193
00:06:58,848 --> 00:06:59,999
Okay. Well, I'm sorry.
194
00:07:00,000 --> 00:07:01,981
I'm just not allowed to stop.
195
00:07:01,982 --> 00:07:03,792
It's against the law.
196
00:07:03,793 --> 00:07:04,793
Are you a dermatologist or a lawyer?
197
00:07:04,794 --> 00:07:05,794
He's a dermatologist.
198
00:07:05,795 --> 00:07:06,805
What, do you, like,
199
00:07:06,806 --> 00:07:07,897
got it out for me?
200
00:07:07,898 --> 00:07:09,635
I'm trying to take
you off the hook here.
201
00:07:09,759 --> 00:07:11,030
What are you looking at me like?
202
00:07:11,031 --> 00:07:13,943
The fuck is this about? What?
203
00:07:13,944 --> 00:07:15,814
What, do you want a piece of me?
204
00:07:15,815 --> 00:07:17,937
Is that it? Huh?
205
00:07:17,938 --> 00:07:20,859
How long have you had that
thing on your neck?
206
00:07:20,860 --> 00:07:21,921
What thing?
207
00:07:21,922 --> 00:07:23,812
Just sit back down in
the chair for me here.
208
00:07:23,813 --> 00:07:24,853
What is it? What are you talking about?
209
00:07:24,854 --> 00:07:26,015
We'll find out. [chuckles]
210
00:07:26,016 --> 00:07:27,046
No, I'm not good like this.
211
00:07:27,047 --> 00:07:28,988
[Machine hissing]
212
00:07:28,989 --> 00:07:30,880
[Dice] Honestly, I
mean, you're my manager,
213
00:07:30,881 --> 00:07:32,031
and it's been a little
quiet on your end.
214
00:07:32,032 --> 00:07:33,913
Quiet on my end?
215
00:07:33,914 --> 00:07:36,845
Yeah, quiet on your
end of, like, the phone.
216
00:07:36,846 --> 00:07:38,007
Your phone's not
ringing, my phone's not ringing.
217
00:07:38,008 --> 00:07:39,899
Neither one of our phones is ringing.
218
00:07:39,900 --> 00:07:41,881
But I know one thing.
219
00:07:41,882 --> 00:07:43,062
I got a call this morning.
220
00:07:43,063 --> 00:07:44,904
Good news.
221
00:07:44,905 --> 00:07:45,985
I got to hear some good news.
222
00:07:45,986 --> 00:07:47,887
I could use it.
223
00:07:47,888 --> 00:07:49,969
I got a phone call from
Tony at the Tangiers casino.
224
00:07:49,970 --> 00:07:51,840
Tony at the Tangiers?
225
00:07:51,841 --> 00:07:52,972
Runs the whole goddamn thing.
226
00:07:52,973 --> 00:07:53,993
Books the big room.
227
00:07:53,994 --> 00:07:56,855
The big room at the Tangiers?
228
00:07:56,856 --> 00:07:58,948
Okay, they're talking
residency. 200 nights a year, Dice.
229
00:07:58,949 --> 00:08:01,850
This is the kind of fucking
news I... dawg, this is...
230
00:08:01,851 --> 00:08:03,062
- [chuckles]
- This is unbelievable, really.
231
00:08:03,063 --> 00:08:04,924
- This is huge. This is huge.
- [motorcycle revs]
232
00:08:04,925 --> 00:08:06,005
And, Tony, Tony wants to meet with you.
233
00:08:06,006 --> 00:08:06,695
I get it. Wait.
234
00:08:06,816 --> 00:08:08,888
What the fuck is this on the bike here?
235
00:08:08,889 --> 00:08:10,019
What the fuck is that?
236
00:08:10,020 --> 00:08:11,921
I don't know.
237
00:08:11,922 --> 00:08:12,972
Hey, you... you want to
meet with my security guy?
238
00:08:12,973 --> 00:08:14,063
No, no, no. I can handle myself.
239
00:08:14,064 --> 00:08:16,926
'Scuse me. Oh!
240
00:08:16,927 --> 00:08:17,977
No fucking pictures!
241
00:08:17,978 --> 00:08:19,078
What are you doing?
242
00:08:19,079 --> 00:08:21,020
Can I help you with something?
243
00:08:21,021 --> 00:08:22,091
What?
244
00:08:22,092 --> 00:08:23,973
What?
245
00:08:23,974 --> 00:08:26,986
Did this used to be a Circuit City?
246
00:08:26,987 --> 00:08:29,919
Yeah, yeah. It closed.
247
00:08:29,920 --> 00:08:32,902
Uh, there's a Five
Guys a couple blocks down.
248
00:08:32,903 --> 00:08:34,914
You make a left on Rancho.
249
00:08:34,915 --> 00:08:36,956
Five Guys is a burger place.
250
00:08:36,957 --> 00:08:39,118
- You mean Best Buy?
- Best Buy.
251
00:08:39,119 --> 00:08:40,980
I love Best Buy so much.
252
00:08:40,981 --> 00:08:42,071
All right. Get on your
bike and get out of here.
253
00:08:42,072 --> 00:08:44,053
- Do you like it?
- Yeah, I love it.
254
00:08:44,054 --> 00:08:45,995
Get the fuck out of here! Do me a favor.
255
00:08:45,996 --> 00:08:47,977
I don't even care what you want anymore.
256
00:08:47,978 --> 00:08:49,088
257
00:08:49,089 --> 00:08:51,000
[Milkshake] Tangiers.
258
00:08:51,001 --> 00:08:52,131
Well, that's... that's not too shabby.
259
00:08:52,132 --> 00:08:55,995
And I hear this guy Tony's
like a... like a huge fucking fan.
260
00:08:55,996 --> 00:08:58,057
So, it's like a... is it a done deal?
261
00:08:58,058 --> 00:08:59,949
There was an incoming call.
262
00:08:59,950 --> 00:09:01,981
That's great.
263
00:09:01,982 --> 00:09:03,953
- What is that?
- What?
264
00:09:03,954 --> 00:09:05,114
Incoming call?
265
00:09:05,115 --> 00:09:07,997
And incoming call, meaning
they called me.
266
00:09:07,998 --> 00:09:09,078
They're looking for me.
267
00:09:09,079 --> 00:09:11,080
It gives me, like, some
kind of leverage.
268
00:09:11,081 --> 00:09:12,962
I... look, I don't have all day
269
00:09:12,963 --> 00:09:14,043
to explain show business to you.
270
00:09:14,044 --> 00:09:16,005
You don't have to, buddy, I get it.
271
00:09:16,006 --> 00:09:17,046
It's an incoming call.
272
00:09:17,047 --> 00:09:18,087
It's like a formality or whatever.
273
00:09:18,088 --> 00:09:21,050
Exactly. It's done,
you know what I mean?
274
00:09:21,051 --> 00:09:22,141
Great.
275
00:09:22,142 --> 00:09:24,123
When they want you, they
want you. That's all.
276
00:09:24,124 --> 00:09:27,977
[Dice] And then this
guy, fucking Dr. Lowenstein
277
00:09:27,978 --> 00:09:29,939
trying to get tough with me?
278
00:09:29,940 --> 00:09:32,031
I mean, it wasn't a
problem. But I'll tell you the truth.
279
00:09:32,032 --> 00:09:34,033
I fixed everything.
280
00:09:34,034 --> 00:09:37,146
That man is out of our life forever.
281
00:09:37,147 --> 00:09:40,990
Except I got to back in
two weeks for a follow-up.
282
00:09:40,991 --> 00:09:43,002
But after that, he's gone forever.
283
00:09:43,003 --> 00:09:44,153
What the fuck, Andrew?
284
00:09:44,154 --> 00:09:46,976
That's a lot of money to
give away for no reason.
285
00:09:46,977 --> 00:09:49,038
What are you worried
about? We got the Tangiers.
286
00:09:49,039 --> 00:09:50,089
We don't got the Tangiers.
287
00:09:50,090 --> 00:09:52,041
We got a meeting at the Tangiers.
288
00:09:52,042 --> 00:09:54,113
How many times I got to tell you,
289
00:09:54,114 --> 00:09:57,016
- it was an incoming call.
- An incoming call?
290
00:09:57,017 --> 00:09:58,087
Yeah.
291
00:09:58,088 --> 00:10:00,019
Let's just have the meeting first.
292
00:10:00,020 --> 00:10:02,181
[Milkshake] Ha, ha!
293
00:10:02,182 --> 00:10:05,044
Why has Milkshake
been on the couch all day?
294
00:10:05,045 --> 00:10:07,156
'Cause he thinks he's the
head of my security team, so...
295
00:10:07,157 --> 00:10:09,989
I don't have the
heart to tell him to leave.
296
00:10:09,990 --> 00:10:11,200
[Knock on door]
297
00:10:11,201 --> 00:10:14,023
[Chuckles] Take it easy, Tiger.
298
00:10:14,024 --> 00:10:15,045
I'll get it.
299
00:10:16,196 --> 00:10:18,187
- Hey, Dice.
- Marvin.
300
00:10:18,188 --> 00:10:21,000
So, uh, Tony changed the meeting,
301
00:10:21,001 --> 00:10:24,053
and it's, uh, tomorrow at 7:30...
302
00:10:24,054 --> 00:10:26,135
7:30? In the morning?
303
00:10:26,136 --> 00:10:28,097
- A.M.
- 7:30 in the morning?
304
00:10:28,098 --> 00:10:29,168
Tony's got an early flight,
305
00:10:29,169 --> 00:10:31,050
so we have to do the
meeting before that.
306
00:10:31,051 --> 00:10:32,181
But he can't get up that early.
307
00:10:32,182 --> 00:10:34,183
He's never woken up before
noon in his life.
308
00:10:34,184 --> 00:10:36,075
I know. That's why I'm telling y'all.
309
00:10:36,076 --> 00:10:38,097
Just change the
meeting. What's the big deal?
310
00:10:38,098 --> 00:10:40,239
Change the meeting. It
was an incoming call.
311
00:10:40,240 --> 00:10:42,111
No, I can't just change the meeting.
312
00:10:42,112 --> 00:10:43,112
And it was an outgoing call.
313
00:10:43,113 --> 00:10:46,105
No, you told me it was incoming.
314
00:10:46,106 --> 00:10:47,156
It was actually an incoming call
315
00:10:47,157 --> 00:10:48,207
after I made the outgoing call.
316
00:10:48,208 --> 00:10:52,121
Are you fucking kidding
me with this here now?
317
00:10:52,122 --> 00:10:54,083
Hey, at least it's a meeting.
318
00:10:54,084 --> 00:10:55,204
Just go to bed early,
319
00:10:55,205 --> 00:10:57,176
and then you get up and get that job,
320
00:10:57,177 --> 00:10:59,248
and you can make it
rain, get the paper...
321
00:10:59,249 --> 00:11:01,110
All right. What are we really talking...
322
00:11:01,111 --> 00:11:03,132
so I'll go to bed
early. I mean, come on.
323
00:11:03,133 --> 00:11:05,074
What... wh-what am I, uh, 5 years old?
324
00:11:05,075 --> 00:11:06,215
Right, Milkshake?
325
00:11:06,216 --> 00:11:08,238
326
00:11:19,149 --> 00:11:21,250
La-da-Di, ah-oooh
327
00:11:21,251 --> 00:11:24,083
La-da-Di, ah-oooh
328
00:11:24,084 --> 00:11:26,165
La-da-Da-Di, ah-oooh
329
00:11:26,166 --> 00:11:31,170
Ohh, La-da-Doo, ah-eee
330
00:11:31,171 --> 00:11:32,221
Yowch!
331
00:11:32,222 --> 00:11:34,173
The burst came first
332
00:11:34,174 --> 00:11:37,266
And then the hurt
333
00:11:37,267 --> 00:11:42,261
-
Then off to Sleep-A-Roola
- [spitting]
334
00:11:42,262 --> 00:11:45,214
[As Sammy Davis Jr.]
You are so beautiful.
335
00:11:45,215 --> 00:11:49,148
Why can't I fall in love?
336
00:11:49,149 --> 00:11:50,249
[Carmen] Andrew!
337
00:11:50,250 --> 00:11:52,221
Go to bed!
338
00:11:52,222 --> 00:11:54,233
I can't yet. I'm not tired.
339
00:11:54,234 --> 00:11:57,226
Well, you got to go to bed.
340
00:11:57,227 --> 00:11:59,308
You got a meeting at 7:30.
341
00:11:59,309 --> 00:12:01,230
- All right.
- Come on!
342
00:12:01,231 --> 00:12:03,172
I'm coming in. I'm coming in.
343
00:12:03,173 --> 00:12:05,194
[Dice] Come on.
344
00:12:05,195 --> 00:12:07,096
[shredder whirring]
345
00:12:07,097 --> 00:12:08,287
Yeah.
346
00:12:08,288 --> 00:12:12,211
Yeeeeah.
347
00:12:12,212 --> 00:12:13,282
Tch!
348
00:12:13,283 --> 00:12:15,234
What are you doing?
349
00:12:15,235 --> 00:12:17,306
[Stammering]
350
00:12:17,307 --> 00:12:19,188
Oh, the shredder.
351
00:12:19,189 --> 00:12:22,231
I just... I can't sleep. I don't know.
352
00:12:22,232 --> 00:12:23,322
If I give you a blow job,
353
00:12:23,323 --> 00:12:26,155
will, you stop playing with
the fucking shredder?
354
00:12:26,156 --> 00:12:28,128
Okay.
355
00:12:29,159 --> 00:12:30,219
But...
356
00:12:30,220 --> 00:12:32,171
be nice to know you're not doing it
357
00:12:32,172 --> 00:12:34,203
just to, like, keep me quiet.
358
00:12:34,204 --> 00:12:36,255
Well, that is why I would do it.
359
00:12:36,256 --> 00:12:39,338
To keep you quiet so
you can go to sleep.
360
00:12:39,339 --> 00:12:43,242
Yeah, but, babe, don't you
think it's nice if a girl
361
00:12:43,243 --> 00:12:46,195
is, like, a little
emotional about your...
362
00:12:46,196 --> 00:12:47,307
you know, your cock?
363
00:12:50,190 --> 00:12:51,250
What?
364
00:12:51,251 --> 00:12:53,182
What do you want me to say, Andrew?
365
00:12:53,183 --> 00:12:55,234
That I didn't hear the fucking shredder?
366
00:12:55,235 --> 00:12:56,355
That I was sound asleep
367
00:12:56,356 --> 00:12:59,228
and then I woke up of my
own fucking volition,
368
00:12:59,229 --> 00:13:00,279
tossing and turning
369
00:13:00,280 --> 00:13:02,151
'cause I couldn't stop dreaming
370
00:13:02,152 --> 00:13:03,282
about sucking your dick?
371
00:13:03,283 --> 00:13:04,363
You see, now that grabs me.
372
00:13:04,364 --> 00:13:06,265
Fuck you.
373
00:13:06,266 --> 00:13:07,326
No! What are you getting mad about?
374
00:13:07,327 --> 00:13:09,338
What... what happened now?
375
00:13:09,339 --> 00:13:11,371
376
00:13:31,191 --> 00:13:33,213
377
00:13:38,298 --> 00:13:39,348
Dice. Hey, man.
378
00:13:39,349 --> 00:13:41,290
- Hey.
- How are you?
379
00:13:41,291 --> 00:13:42,045
What are you doing?
380
00:13:42,046 --> 00:13:43,083
I'm all right. How you doing?
381
00:13:43,084 --> 00:13:45,334
Eh, I couldn't sleep. I had to get out.
382
00:13:45,335 --> 00:13:47,276
- What's going on?
- Got a meeting.
383
00:13:47,277 --> 00:13:49,368
Thought maybe, uh...
maybe I could play some cards?
384
00:13:49,369 --> 00:13:51,340
Wow. That's...
385
00:13:51,341 --> 00:13:54,223
Cards, I mean, that's... you
know, because I got to...
386
00:13:54,224 --> 00:13:56,275
I-I mean, I could see
if we could extend you
387
00:13:56,276 --> 00:13:58,417
some more credit, but the
truth is, uh, you know...
388
00:13:58,418 --> 00:14:00,419
You know what, you could do me a favor.
389
00:14:00,420 --> 00:14:02,241
There's a guy here, he's a high roller,
390
00:14:02,242 --> 00:14:03,352
he's having a bachelor party,
391
00:14:03,353 --> 00:14:04,443
and I'm just
thinking maybe you could just
392
00:14:04,444 --> 00:14:06,365
pop your head into the
party bus, do your Dice thing.
393
00:14:06,366 --> 00:14:08,287
Give him a thrill, you
know what I'm saying?
394
00:14:08,288 --> 00:14:10,329
Psh, come on. Not tonight.
395
00:14:10,330 --> 00:14:11,410
Not tonight.
396
00:14:11,411 --> 00:14:13,332
You have no idea what's
going on in my life.
397
00:14:13,333 --> 00:14:14,393
I-I was offered
398
00:14:14,394 --> 00:14:17,246
a pity blow job tonight.
399
00:14:17,247 --> 00:14:18,397
How'd that go?
400
00:14:18,398 --> 00:14:20,309
I fucked that up, too.
401
00:14:20,310 --> 00:14:22,361
I don't know how you
fuck up a pity blow job.
402
00:14:22,362 --> 00:14:25,274
You know, listen. These guys, honestly,
403
00:14:25,275 --> 00:14:26,415
they grew up worshipping you, man.
404
00:14:26,416 --> 00:14:28,237
I don't know.
405
00:14:28,238 --> 00:14:29,558
I know you owe us a lot of money.
406
00:14:34,364 --> 00:14:36,355
- Right?
- Okay.
407
00:14:36,356 --> 00:14:37,416
I saw you. You were
like, "Okay, I'm open to it."
408
00:14:37,417 --> 00:14:38,407
Let's do it.
409
00:14:38,408 --> 00:14:41,370
[Chatter]
410
00:14:41,371 --> 00:14:43,372
This is the guy.
411
00:14:43,373 --> 00:14:45,294
Hey, guys. How you doing?
412
00:14:45,295 --> 00:14:46,375
Hey.
413
00:14:46,376 --> 00:14:47,386
Yeah, Brett asked me to come on
414
00:14:47,387 --> 00:14:49,268
and, uh... to say hi.
415
00:14:49,269 --> 00:14:50,359
Who's Brett again?
416
00:14:50,360 --> 00:14:51,420
He's the guy who got us the shuttle.
417
00:14:51,421 --> 00:14:52,481
- How's it going?
- Who are you?
418
00:14:52,482 --> 00:14:54,313
No, that don't matter.
419
00:14:54,314 --> 00:14:55,464
I just came on to say congratulations.
420
00:14:55,465 --> 00:14:58,267
Lots of luck to you,
you know what I mean?
421
00:14:58,268 --> 00:15:00,389
Guys! Do you know who this is?!
422
00:15:00,390 --> 00:15:02,331
What's up, man?!
423
00:15:02,332 --> 00:15:04,383
- What's happening?
- What's up?!
424
00:15:04,384 --> 00:15:05,494
- Everything's cool.
- Yeah! Dude!
425
00:15:05,495 --> 00:15:07,396
Lot of people say they're fans of yours.
426
00:15:07,397 --> 00:15:08,417
I'm an actual fan of yours.
427
00:15:08,418 --> 00:15:10,309
That's cool.
428
00:15:10,310 --> 00:15:11,430
- Huge fan of yours.
- Yeah, yeah.
429
00:15:11,431 --> 00:15:12,491
He dressed up like you at our retreat.
430
00:15:12,492 --> 00:15:14,423
- Show him the pic.
- Oh, check it out!
431
00:15:14,424 --> 00:15:16,295
Show him the picture. Show him the pic.
432
00:15:16,296 --> 00:15:17,316
I mean, is that me or is that you?
433
00:15:17,317 --> 00:15:18,347
- That... yeah.
- I'm you!
434
00:15:18,348 --> 00:15:19,458
- Very cool.
- [laughs]
435
00:15:19,459 --> 00:15:21,330
You're like my spirit animal, man.
436
00:15:21,331 --> 00:15:22,501
Hey, hey, hey. Guys, guys.
437
00:15:22,502 --> 00:15:24,423
How... how drunk are you? Jesus!
438
00:15:24,424 --> 00:15:26,325
This is Andrew Dice Clay.
439
00:15:26,326 --> 00:15:27,476
Get this man a drink.
440
00:15:27,477 --> 00:15:29,348
- Get him a drink now.
- No, no, no.
441
00:15:29,349 --> 00:15:30,479
- Get him a drink!
- I got to get out of here.
442
00:15:30,480 --> 00:15:32,331
[All exclaiming]
443
00:15:32,332 --> 00:15:33,432
A toast.
444
00:15:33,433 --> 00:15:35,484
To you. To you. To you.
445
00:15:35,485 --> 00:15:37,326
You're coming to my wedding.
446
00:15:37,327 --> 00:15:38,427
- All right.
- You're coming to my wedding.
447
00:15:38,428 --> 00:15:39,518
- Yeah.
- [engine rumbles]
448
00:15:39,519 --> 00:15:40,539
- Oh!
- Whoa!
449
00:15:40,540 --> 00:15:43,442
- Oh, Dice down!
- Fuck!
450
00:15:43,443 --> 00:15:45,474
- Ohhh!
- Party foul!
451
00:15:45,475 --> 00:15:47,326
[Dice] Yo, driver!
452
00:15:47,327 --> 00:15:49,318
Yeah, pull this shuttle over, all right?
453
00:15:49,319 --> 00:15:50,479
I'm gonna pull over, but
I got to circle around.
454
00:15:50,480 --> 00:15:52,491
- Don't stop!
- No, no, no, no.
455
00:15:52,492 --> 00:15:54,453
Guys, come on.
456
00:15:54,454 --> 00:15:56,445
- Keep driving!
- He's up!
457
00:15:56,446 --> 00:15:58,417
And he's up!
458
00:15:58,418 --> 00:16:00,409
[all cheering]
459
00:16:00,410 --> 00:16:01,470
[Men chanting "Dice"!]
460
00:16:01,471 --> 00:16:05,355
461
00:16:12,422 --> 00:16:15,345
[Indistinct chanting]
462
00:16:21,491 --> 00:16:23,563
463
00:16:24,454 --> 00:16:26,556
[Men chanting "Dice!"]
464
00:16:30,540 --> 00:16:34,453
[Scattered laughter]
465
00:16:34,454 --> 00:16:36,485
[Babbling]
466
00:16:36,486 --> 00:16:38,397
[laughter]
467
00:16:38,398 --> 00:16:41,590
- Hey, it's the Bellagio!
- I saw Joan Rivers there.
468
00:16:41,591 --> 00:16:45,464
Joan Rivers was so full of plastic,
469
00:16:45,465 --> 00:16:47,606
a homeless man took her out of the trash
470
00:16:47,607 --> 00:16:49,528
and recycled her for 10 cents.
471
00:16:49,529 --> 00:16:50,569
[laughter]
472
00:16:50,570 --> 00:16:51,302
That's funny.
473
00:16:51,303 --> 00:16:53,532
She probably would have liked that.
474
00:16:53,533 --> 00:16:55,404
But how about showing a little respect?
475
00:16:55,405 --> 00:16:56,535
I mean, I was good friends with her.
476
00:16:56,536 --> 00:16:58,547
Oh, guys, you got to be careful.
477
00:16:58,548 --> 00:17:01,610
Let's all not call
her a dead fucking bitch.
478
00:17:01,611 --> 00:17:03,442
[Men chuckling]
479
00:17:03,443 --> 00:17:04,583
Joan Rivers!
480
00:17:04,584 --> 00:17:06,475
You know what, I'm
starting to get a little angry.
481
00:17:06,476 --> 00:17:08,547
I mean, you don't know
me, you know what I mean?
482
00:17:08,548 --> 00:17:10,429
So chill out with it.
483
00:17:10,430 --> 00:17:12,451
Come on, man, relax! Look at you!
484
00:17:12,452 --> 00:17:13,632
We're just fucking kidding.
485
00:17:13,633 --> 00:17:16,435
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You
know what? You know what?
486
00:17:16,436 --> 00:17:18,407
Going forward, from now on,
487
00:17:18,408 --> 00:17:20,459
we won't call Joan Rivers a dead...
488
00:17:20,460 --> 00:17:22,601
- fucking... bitch.
- Oh, a dead fucking bitch!
489
00:17:22,602 --> 00:17:24,513
You think that's funny?
490
00:17:24,514 --> 00:17:25,644
You think that's funny?
491
00:17:25,645 --> 00:17:28,557
Why don't you fucking
get up and say that?
492
00:17:28,558 --> 00:17:30,649
I would... I would if I could.
493
00:17:30,650 --> 00:17:32,641
Mike's paralyzed.
494
00:17:32,642 --> 00:17:35,534
H-his wheelchair's up front.
495
00:17:35,535 --> 00:17:37,536
Oh, really? I don't give a fuck
496
00:17:37,537 --> 00:17:40,539
if he's deaf and blind and missing
both his arms and legs.
497
00:17:40,540 --> 00:17:41,610
I'll take that wheelchair,
498
00:17:41,611 --> 00:17:43,622
I'll bang it through your fucking head.
499
00:17:43,623 --> 00:17:47,546
Oh, yeah? Well, fuck Joan Rivers.
500
00:17:47,547 --> 00:17:49,478
And fuck you too, Gene Simmons.
501
00:17:49,479 --> 00:17:51,470
Your band fucking sucks dick.
502
00:17:51,471 --> 00:17:52,601
Hey, asshole. Fuck...
503
00:17:52,602 --> 00:17:56,485
Hey! Hey, guys, guys!
504
00:17:56,486 --> 00:17:57,627
[Bird shrieks]
505
00:18:03,573 --> 00:18:05,664
[Wood creaking]
506
00:18:05,665 --> 00:18:08,468
[Alarm chiming]
507
00:18:14,674 --> 00:18:17,517
508
00:18:24,694 --> 00:18:26,546
[Groans]
509
00:18:34,614 --> 00:18:36,536
Oh, God.
510
00:18:53,683 --> 00:18:55,605
[Sighs]
511
00:18:58,678 --> 00:19:00,530
[Exhales sharply]
512
00:19:11,751 --> 00:19:13,673
[Sighs]
513
00:19:22,552 --> 00:19:23,752
- Hi. Good morning.
- Hi.
514
00:19:23,753 --> 00:19:25,654
- How you doing?
- I'm good.
515
00:19:25,655 --> 00:19:26,755
- How are you?
- I'm good. Here for Tony.
516
00:19:26,756 --> 00:19:29,568
Okay. Are you bleeding?
517
00:19:29,569 --> 00:19:31,700
Uh, I was. I'm all right now.
518
00:19:31,701 --> 00:19:33,542
Thanks.
519
00:19:33,543 --> 00:19:34,663
Okay. You can go on through.
520
00:19:34,664 --> 00:19:35,774
Thank you.
521
00:19:35,775 --> 00:19:37,667
[Sighs]
522
00:19:41,761 --> 00:19:44,553
- How's it going?
- Oh!
523
00:19:44,554 --> 00:19:45,704
There he is.
524
00:19:45,705 --> 00:19:46,635
Right on time.
525
00:19:46,754 --> 00:19:48,787
And everybody said
you were gonna be late.
526
00:19:48,788 --> 00:19:50,609
[Chuckling] Oh, yeah.
527
00:19:50,610 --> 00:19:51,630
- Hi.
- Hi.
528
00:19:51,631 --> 00:19:53,592
I'm looking for, uh, Tony.
529
00:19:53,593 --> 00:19:54,753
Yeah, that's me.
530
00:19:54,754 --> 00:19:55,774
Toni with an "I."
531
00:19:55,775 --> 00:19:58,577
Come on, have a seat.
532
00:19:58,578 --> 00:20:00,589
Toni with an "I." I
wasn't even thinking that way.
533
00:20:00,590 --> 00:20:02,591
No?
534
00:20:02,592 --> 00:20:05,574
I mean, normally, uh, you
know, women don't run casinos.
535
00:20:05,575 --> 00:20:06,765
Okay, let me stop you there.
536
00:20:06,766 --> 00:20:09,588
I used to crack
heads at Lockheed Martin.
537
00:20:09,589 --> 00:20:11,740
It's a place where the
guys had a lot bigger dicks
538
00:20:11,741 --> 00:20:13,582
than anybody around here.
539
00:20:13,583 --> 00:20:14,763
And you know who had the biggest?
540
00:20:14,764 --> 00:20:17,606
- No.
- Me.
541
00:20:17,607 --> 00:20:19,788
You want me to take my dick out?
542
00:20:19,789 --> 00:20:21,750
- No.
- You sure?
543
00:20:21,751 --> 00:20:24,723
Because I'll lay it
out on this fucking table.
544
00:20:24,724 --> 00:20:26,805
It's big enough to make you blush.
545
00:20:26,806 --> 00:20:29,648
So, enough talk about me.
546
00:20:29,649 --> 00:20:31,640
Let's talk about you.
547
00:20:31,641 --> 00:20:32,801
You got the job.
548
00:20:32,802 --> 00:20:34,803
I got the job?
549
00:20:34,804 --> 00:20:35,834
Yeah, you got it.
550
00:20:35,835 --> 00:20:38,817
I'm thinking about residency.
551
00:20:38,818 --> 00:20:40,779
200 shows a year.
552
00:20:40,780 --> 00:20:42,681
Oh, my God.
553
00:20:42,682 --> 00:20:44,663
You want one of our
limos to pick you up at home,
554
00:20:44,664 --> 00:20:45,694
bring you to work?
555
00:20:45,695 --> 00:20:46,815
Yeah, sure!
556
00:20:46,816 --> 00:20:48,737
Did you see that documentary
557
00:20:48,738 --> 00:20:51,750
about that sushi guy who
lives in the subway in Tokyo?
558
00:20:51,751 --> 00:20:53,742
Well, I got a guy like that.
559
00:20:53,743 --> 00:20:55,644
A sushi master.
560
00:20:55,645 --> 00:20:56,755
That's... that's terrific.
561
00:20:56,756 --> 00:20:57,836
Yeah, and you can
order whatever you want
562
00:20:57,837 --> 00:20:58,857
on the nights you work.
563
00:20:58,858 --> 00:21:00,639
Thank you.
564
00:21:00,640 --> 00:21:01,720
So?
565
00:21:01,721 --> 00:21:03,692
All we got to do now is, uh...
566
00:21:03,693 --> 00:21:05,704
you know, we got to call my manager,
567
00:21:05,705 --> 00:21:06,855
you know, uh, make the deal.
568
00:21:06,856 --> 00:21:08,687
Whatever money.
569
00:21:08,688 --> 00:21:09,868
Well, we could do that.
570
00:21:09,869 --> 00:21:12,782
Or I could just write
you out a check right now.
571
00:21:14,854 --> 00:21:15,834
How about I write you out a check?
572
00:21:15,835 --> 00:21:17,736
Yeah.
573
00:21:17,737 --> 00:21:18,807
Great!
574
00:21:18,808 --> 00:21:21,830
That's fantastic. [sighs]
575
00:21:21,831 --> 00:21:23,672
It's just such a relief
576
00:21:23,673 --> 00:21:24,863
after everything I've
been going through.
577
00:21:24,864 --> 00:21:26,705
I mean, you know,
578
00:21:26,706 --> 00:21:27,856
my girl's breaking my chops,
579
00:21:27,857 --> 00:21:29,768
everything's broken at the house.
580
00:21:29,769 --> 00:21:30,859
I mean, thank you.
581
00:21:30,860 --> 00:21:32,752
Thank you.
582
00:21:37,737 --> 00:21:41,820
"Dance monkey"? What the fuck is this?
583
00:21:41,821 --> 00:21:44,813
Do you have any idea how
much you've lost at this casino?
584
00:21:44,814 --> 00:21:46,815
How much money you owe me?
585
00:21:46,816 --> 00:21:49,879
All right, I know I'm
down some money, but come on.
586
00:21:49,880 --> 00:21:51,780
Do you know where you're going to be
587
00:21:51,781 --> 00:21:54,703
between may 4th and December 10th?
588
00:21:54,704 --> 00:21:55,724
Shh!
589
00:21:55,725 --> 00:21:56,835
You're gonna be here.
590
00:21:56,836 --> 00:21:58,989
I know what you're
thinking. "This is slavery."
591
00:21:59,127 --> 00:22:00,910
But slaves don't have
their names in lights.
592
00:22:00,911 --> 00:22:02,821
You do.
593
00:22:02,822 --> 00:22:06,765
It's more like you're
a white woman in Japan,
594
00:22:06,766 --> 00:22:08,898
except instead of a nice shaved pussy,
595
00:22:08,899 --> 00:22:10,860
you got a fat Jewish mouth.
596
00:22:14,724 --> 00:22:16,876
Dice, I'm not that bad.
597
00:22:16,877 --> 00:22:19,818
I've arranged it so
that you can keep your house.
598
00:22:19,819 --> 00:22:22,741
Take a couple of months off, go on tour.
599
00:22:22,742 --> 00:22:23,822
I know you have to eat.
600
00:22:23,823 --> 00:22:26,836
But the rest of the
year, I need you to wear this.
601
00:22:28,899 --> 00:22:30,839
A beeper?
602
00:22:30,840 --> 00:22:32,772
You're my insurance policy.
603
00:22:33,803 --> 00:22:35,875
Carrot Top gets sick, I got Dice.
604
00:22:35,876 --> 00:22:40,759
Jerry Bruckheimer wants to
throw a bachelor party, I got Dice.
605
00:22:40,760 --> 00:22:43,963
A Sudanese billionaire wants
to watch somebody fuck somebody?
606
00:22:43,964 --> 00:22:45,804
I got Dice.
607
00:22:45,805 --> 00:22:47,756
What I'm trying to say is
608
00:22:47,757 --> 00:22:50,779
welcome to the Tangiers family.
609
00:22:50,780 --> 00:22:53,812
[Scoffs]
610
00:22:53,813 --> 00:22:55,945
Okay, what the fuck
are you smiling about?
611
00:22:55,946 --> 00:22:58,827
[Chuckles] Let me tell you something.
612
00:22:58,828 --> 00:22:59,979
You know how they say, like,
613
00:22:59,980 --> 00:23:02,831
when you owe the bank a
few dollars, the bank owns you?
614
00:23:02,832 --> 00:23:05,794
But when you owe the
bank a lot of money,
615
00:23:05,795 --> 00:23:06,936
you own the bank,
616
00:23:06,937 --> 00:23:08,757
if you see what I'm saying over there.
617
00:23:08,758 --> 00:23:09,818
No.
618
00:23:09,819 --> 00:23:10,960
Well, thing is this.
619
00:23:10,961 --> 00:23:13,862
I mean, yeah, I lost at the tables,
620
00:23:13,863 --> 00:23:15,146
but I won big in here.
621
00:23:15,279 --> 00:23:16,906
I'm pretty sure you lost here.
622
00:23:16,907 --> 00:23:17,957
Oh, really?
623
00:23:17,958 --> 00:23:19,879
I got my name in lights again, right?
624
00:23:19,880 --> 00:23:22,932
I'm onstage at the
Tangiers in Las Vegas, right?
625
00:23:22,933 --> 00:23:25,975
Well, you know something,
that's something I'd do for free.
626
00:23:25,976 --> 00:23:27,856
You are doing it for free.
627
00:23:27,857 --> 00:23:31,780
I play the big room
every Saturday night.
628
00:23:31,781 --> 00:23:32,882
Thursday.
629
00:23:32,883 --> 00:23:33,973
Fridays.
630
00:23:33,974 --> 00:23:35,915
- Thursday.
- Done.
631
00:23:35,916 --> 00:23:37,887
- Yeah.
- Done.
632
00:23:37,888 --> 00:23:40,789
And one other thing.
633
00:23:40,790 --> 00:23:41,881
You can keep the sushi.
634
00:23:41,882 --> 00:23:42,962
I mean, I don't believe in fish.
635
00:23:42,963 --> 00:23:44,003
I never did.
636
00:23:44,004 --> 00:23:46,835
I don't need a limo.
637
00:23:46,836 --> 00:23:50,970
But I'm gonna need a
check every month... $538.58.
638
00:23:50,971 --> 00:23:52,952
For transportation.
639
00:23:52,953 --> 00:23:57,816
Come see the show one night.
640
00:23:57,817 --> 00:23:58,988
I'll get right on that.
641
00:23:58,989 --> 00:24:03,862
Hey, fuckhead, you forgot the calendar.
642
00:24:03,863 --> 00:24:06,866
643
00:24:13,934 --> 00:24:15,975
[Dice] Thanks a lot, pal.
644
00:24:15,976 --> 00:24:18,918
Marvin called. He said you got the gig!
645
00:24:18,919 --> 00:24:20,980
- Yeah, I got the gig.
- [giggles]
646
00:24:20,981 --> 00:24:22,932
Congratulations! I'm so proud of you!
647
00:24:22,933 --> 00:24:24,053
Get over here. Get over here.
648
00:24:24,054 --> 00:24:26,025
You did it! We got to celebrate.
649
00:24:26,026 --> 00:24:28,978
Why don't we get one of those
bottles of champagne you love?
650
00:24:28,979 --> 00:24:30,960
You know what? We're
gonna go for a drive.
651
00:24:30,961 --> 00:24:31,981
A drive?
652
00:24:31,982 --> 00:24:34,023
After you, my little queen.
653
00:24:34,024 --> 00:24:36,025
What happened to your eye?
654
00:24:36,026 --> 00:24:38,928
Oh, it... it's funny. I'll
te... here, get in the car.
655
00:24:38,929 --> 00:24:40,079
- I'll tell you.
- Sounds funny.
656
00:24:40,080 --> 00:24:41,901
Funny already.
657
00:24:41,902 --> 00:24:45,886
Babe. Tangiers. Denali.
658
00:24:46,967 --> 00:24:49,929
So, how much are they paying you?
659
00:24:49,930 --> 00:24:53,993
Lightning struck my head
660
00:24:53,994 --> 00:24:57,066
Mystics tone and
soak their dirty paws
661
00:24:57,067 --> 00:25:00,049
Where can we go?
662
00:25:00,050 --> 00:25:03,016
The only hope that's
left< is in our home
663
00:25:03,146 --> 00:25:08,449
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664
00:25:08,499 --> 00:25:13,049
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