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1
00:00:08,500 --> 00:00:10,450
Did you hear about old Bob Cromer?
2
00:00:10,500 --> 00:00:13,450
- What about him?
- Exhumed, mate.
3
00:00:13,500 --> 00:00:16,450
- What?
- Grave robbed.
4
00:00:16,500 --> 00:00:17,450
By who?!
5
00:00:17,500 --> 00:00:20,500
Nobody knows. Night hawks.
6
00:00:21,500 --> 00:00:25,450
Rumour has it he was buried
with some of his best finds.
7
00:00:25,500 --> 00:00:29,500
James I guinea, medieval
posy ring, that Viking torc.
8
00:00:31,500 --> 00:00:34,450
They came in the night and dug him up.
9
00:00:34,500 --> 00:00:35,450
Unbelievable.
10
00:00:35,500 --> 00:00:38,500
- The things some people'll
do for gold. - Yeah.
11
00:00:45,500 --> 00:00:46,450
Poor old Bob.
12
00:00:46,500 --> 00:00:49,500
Bet he never thought he'd end
up on that end of a detector.
13
00:00:58,500 --> 00:01:03,450
Will you search through
the lonely earth for me?
14
00:01:03,500 --> 00:01:08,450
Climb through the briar and bramble
15
00:01:08,500 --> 00:01:13,450
I'll be your treasure
16
00:01:13,500 --> 00:01:18,450
I'm waiting for you
17
00:01:18,500 --> 00:01:21,500
I'm waiting for you...
18
00:01:27,500 --> 00:01:30,500
BIRDSONG
19
00:01:33,500 --> 00:01:35,450
No...
20
00:01:35,500 --> 00:01:38,450
The idea of what is considered beautiful
21
00:01:38,500 --> 00:01:39,500
changes through time.
22
00:01:40,500 --> 00:01:42,450
Like...
23
00:01:42,500 --> 00:01:45,450
Well, back in the Tudor period,
24
00:01:45,500 --> 00:01:48,450
you might've been considered
really attractive.
25
00:01:48,500 --> 00:01:53,500
You know, scrawny, a bit
of beard and the hair.
26
00:01:54,500 --> 00:01:56,450
Stick a ruff around your neck,
27
00:01:56,500 --> 00:01:58,450
you could've been one of
Lizzie I's favourites.
28
00:01:58,500 --> 00:02:00,450
Right, and how far back in
time would you have to go
29
00:02:00,500 --> 00:02:03,450
before YOU were considered attractive?
30
00:02:03,500 --> 00:02:05,450
Oh, no, no, no, I...
31
00:02:05,500 --> 00:02:07,500
My time is right around the corner.
32
00:02:09,500 --> 00:02:11,500
Within the next couple of years, I reckon.
33
00:02:16,500 --> 00:02:19,500
METAL DETECTOR BEEPS
34
00:02:24,500 --> 00:02:26,450
I'm going to call it a
day and head into town.
35
00:02:26,500 --> 00:02:28,450
I said I'd drop by the library.
36
00:02:28,500 --> 00:02:30,450
Sophie's meeting Peter to
research that plane crash.
37
00:02:30,500 --> 00:02:33,450
I can't get into it.
38
00:02:33,500 --> 00:02:35,450
It's not old enough.
39
00:02:35,500 --> 00:02:38,500
If it hasn't been forgotten,
I'm not interested.
40
00:02:39,500 --> 00:02:42,450
- I'm on a different quest.
- Oh, yeah. What's that, then?
41
00:02:42,500 --> 00:02:44,500
Oh, I dunno.
42
00:02:45,500 --> 00:02:49,500
My heart has followed all my
days something I cannot name.
43
00:02:50,500 --> 00:02:52,450
Blimey.
44
00:02:52,500 --> 00:02:56,450
Yeah, I won't be able to rest
until I've danced the gold dance.
45
00:02:56,500 --> 00:02:57,450
You're not coming, then?
46
00:02:57,500 --> 00:03:00,500
- No, got plans.
- Oh, yeah, what you doin'?
47
00:03:02,500 --> 00:03:06,500
Um? Oh, er, I gotta pop into Screwfix.
48
00:03:09,500 --> 00:03:10,500
What you got?
49
00:03:11,500 --> 00:03:13,450
Boat.
50
00:03:13,500 --> 00:03:15,450
- What, a boat?
- Hmm?
51
00:03:15,500 --> 00:03:18,450
No, B-O-A-T -- Bit Off A Tractor.
52
00:03:18,500 --> 00:03:19,500
HE SNORTS
53
00:03:21,500 --> 00:03:23,450
What, haven't you heard that one?
54
00:03:23,500 --> 00:03:25,450
Course I haven't. You just made it up.
55
00:03:25,500 --> 00:03:28,500
Oh, it's an old one, that is, like POACH.
56
00:03:30,500 --> 00:03:31,450
Go on.
57
00:03:31,500 --> 00:03:33,450
Part Of A Combine Harvester?
58
00:03:33,500 --> 00:03:34,500
Bullshit.
59
00:03:45,500 --> 00:03:46,450
- Hi.
- Hello.
60
00:03:46,500 --> 00:03:48,450
- How are you?
- Good.
61
00:03:48,500 --> 00:03:51,450
Um, listen, thank you for
helping me out with this.
62
00:03:51,500 --> 00:03:52,450
It's all right.
63
00:03:52,500 --> 00:03:55,450
- I'm a sucker for a bit of research.
- You're a what?
64
00:03:55,500 --> 00:03:58,450
- Doesn't matter.
- THEY LAUGH
65
00:03:58,500 --> 00:04:02,450
- Are any of the others coming down?
- I don't think so. - That's good. - Yeah?
66
00:04:02,500 --> 00:04:06,450
- Yeah, they were all so enthusiastic,
especially the main guy. - Terry.
67
00:04:06,500 --> 00:04:09,450
- I'm worried they'll be
disappointed. - How come?
68
00:04:09,500 --> 00:04:11,450
Well, even if we find the crash site,
69
00:04:11,500 --> 00:04:14,450
- I don't think there'll be
much left of the plane. - Oh.
70
00:04:14,500 --> 00:04:18,450
We're used to not finding very much
at the DMDC, that's what we do best.
71
00:04:18,500 --> 00:04:19,500
HE LAUGHS
72
00:04:20,500 --> 00:04:22,450
MUSIC POUNDS INSIDE
73
00:04:22,500 --> 00:04:25,450
DAVID ESSEX:
Flying high
74
00:04:25,500 --> 00:04:30,450
I've got a lot of love inside
75
00:04:30,500 --> 00:04:34,450
Is there love enough
now to get me through?
76
00:04:34,500 --> 00:04:39,450
Yeah, I know now where I'm going to
77
00:04:39,500 --> 00:04:43,450
Not to lose now, but to win
78
00:04:43,500 --> 00:04:48,500
Tell me, how do I begin?
79
00:04:50,500 --> 00:04:53,450
I've a dream
80
00:04:53,500 --> 00:04:57,500
Silver dream machine...
81
00:05:02,500 --> 00:05:03,500
Me?
82
00:05:05,500 --> 00:05:06,500
I'm in fruit and veg.
83
00:05:09,500 --> 00:05:11,500
I'm in fruit and vegetables.
84
00:05:12,500 --> 00:05:17,450
Did you know... 90% of onions are
consumed in their country of origin?
85
00:05:17,500 --> 00:05:18,500
Hmm.
86
00:05:20,500 --> 00:05:24,450
There's hardly any
international trade in onions.
87
00:05:24,500 --> 00:05:25,450
What, this old thing?
88
00:05:25,500 --> 00:05:27,450
HE LAUGHS
89
00:05:27,500 --> 00:05:30,500
Oh, thank you. Well,
I've had it for years.
90
00:05:33,500 --> 00:05:34,450
Do I drive?
91
00:05:34,500 --> 00:05:36,450
Well, you, er...
92
00:05:36,500 --> 00:05:40,500
You might have seen that yellow
car parked up outside? The, er...?
93
00:05:41,500 --> 00:05:43,450
Yes.
94
00:05:43,500 --> 00:05:45,450
TR7.
95
00:05:45,500 --> 00:05:47,450
Do you know about them?
96
00:05:47,500 --> 00:05:51,450
Well, I've, er, I've actually
done quite a lot of work on her.
97
00:05:51,500 --> 00:05:53,450
Re-sprayed her Aztec Yellow,
98
00:05:53,500 --> 00:05:55,500
whereas the original would've been...
99
00:05:57,500 --> 00:05:58,450
That's right.
100
00:05:58,500 --> 00:06:00,500
.. Mimosa Yellow.
101
00:06:01,500 --> 00:06:02,500
And you, er...?
102
00:06:04,500 --> 00:06:05,500
Do you have a car?
103
00:06:07,500 --> 00:06:08,500
Really?
104
00:06:10,500 --> 00:06:12,450
What, the one in, er...
105
00:06:12,500 --> 00:06:14,500
Back To The Future?
106
00:06:16,500 --> 00:06:18,450
I've given myself a year off.
107
00:06:18,500 --> 00:06:21,450
I was fed up with my
job, so I jacked it in
108
00:06:21,500 --> 00:06:23,450
and I'm travelling for a year.
109
00:06:23,500 --> 00:06:25,450
I wrote a list of things I
want to achieve in this year
110
00:06:25,500 --> 00:06:29,450
and one of those things was to
find my grandfather's resting place
111
00:06:29,500 --> 00:06:32,450
- and lay a wreath.
- That's really nice.
112
00:06:32,500 --> 00:06:34,450
I've been wanting to for a long time.
113
00:06:34,500 --> 00:06:36,450
This year is the year
for getting things done.
114
00:06:36,500 --> 00:06:40,450
So what else is on your list?
Don't say bungee jumping.
115
00:06:40,500 --> 00:06:42,450
- Catch a big fish.
- OK.
116
00:06:42,500 --> 00:06:44,450
Fall in love.
117
00:06:44,500 --> 00:06:47,450
- Wait, isn't that on everybody's
list all of the time? - Is it?
118
00:06:47,500 --> 00:06:50,450
I don't know. Wasn't
on mine for a long time.
119
00:06:50,500 --> 00:06:52,450
But I'm ready now.
120
00:06:52,500 --> 00:06:54,450
I'm going to make a concerted effort.
121
00:06:54,500 --> 00:06:57,450
Right, yeah, cos that's
usually how it happens(!)
122
00:06:57,500 --> 00:07:00,450
- Yeah? - Yeah, sure! I mean,
you decide to fall in love,
123
00:07:00,500 --> 00:07:03,450
you try really hard and
then you fall in love(!)
124
00:07:03,500 --> 00:07:08,450
- You're being sarcastic. - Yeah!
- Well done, very clever. - Thank you!
125
00:07:08,500 --> 00:07:09,450
HE LAUGHS
126
00:07:09,500 --> 00:07:13,450
So what qualities are you
looking for in your new love?
127
00:07:13,500 --> 00:07:14,500
- Sarcasm.
- Hmm!
128
00:07:16,500 --> 00:07:20,450
As discussed, the summer fair
is going to be Dickens-themed
129
00:07:20,500 --> 00:07:24,450
and I'd like all attending staff
in Victorian dress, if you would.
130
00:07:24,500 --> 00:07:27,450
Um, this costume hire
company has a nice range.
131
00:07:27,500 --> 00:07:29,450
Expensive, but worth it.
132
00:07:29,500 --> 00:07:31,450
As I'm sure you're all aware, last year,
133
00:07:31,500 --> 00:07:35,450
Oakfield Lane Primary School
raised? 5,000 at their annual fete
134
00:07:35,500 --> 00:07:39,450
and I'm determined we're
going to beat that.
135
00:07:39,500 --> 00:07:42,450
Um... could I ask you all
136
00:07:42,500 --> 00:07:45,450
not to double park outside
the front of the school?
137
00:07:45,500 --> 00:07:48,450
Mr Dale had to get to Asda
yesterday and he couldn't get out.
138
00:07:48,500 --> 00:07:50,450
Well, where are we supposed to go, then?!
139
00:07:50,500 --> 00:07:54,450
I'm having to park further and
further away and walk the rest.
140
00:07:54,500 --> 00:07:57,450
You only live a mile away, Janet.
141
00:07:57,500 --> 00:07:58,450
Exactly!
142
00:07:58,500 --> 00:08:01,450
It's hardly worth me driving in at all.
143
00:08:01,500 --> 00:08:03,500
We need to sort out
some more parking spaces.
144
00:08:21,500 --> 00:08:23,450
Hi.
145
00:08:23,500 --> 00:08:24,450
Hey, Lance.
146
00:08:24,500 --> 00:08:27,450
- It's Andy.
- Oh, yeah, Lance is the other guy.
147
00:08:27,500 --> 00:08:32,450
- Funny little guy. - Funny
little guy? - Yeah, you know.
148
00:08:32,500 --> 00:08:33,450
- HE LAUGHS
- Hmm.
149
00:08:33,500 --> 00:08:35,450
- How's it going?
- Good, good.
150
00:08:35,500 --> 00:08:39,450
We found a newspaper article
and Sophie's gone to get coffee.
151
00:08:39,500 --> 00:08:41,500
- Oh, great. Can I see?
- Yeah.
152
00:08:42,500 --> 00:08:45,450
This is from the morning after
the crash, there's no photo
153
00:08:45,500 --> 00:08:48,450
and they just said it was near
Henbury -- nothing more specific.
154
00:08:48,500 --> 00:08:52,450
But it does say that the plane
came straight down nose-first
155
00:08:52,500 --> 00:08:54,450
and pretty much buried
itself in the ground.
156
00:08:54,500 --> 00:08:58,450
- And does it mention the crew?
- Um...
157
00:08:58,500 --> 00:09:00,450
No, I don't think so.
158
00:09:00,500 --> 00:09:02,450
Right, well, I found a
list of their names online.
159
00:09:02,500 --> 00:09:04,450
It doesn't say what happened
to them, but it does say
160
00:09:04,500 --> 00:09:07,450
that they're all accounted
for, which I don't understand.
161
00:09:07,500 --> 00:09:09,500
- Which was your grandfather?
- Let me see.
162
00:09:11,500 --> 00:09:14,450
Yeah, here -- Reinfrit Schneider.
163
00:09:14,500 --> 00:09:16,450
Forward gunner.
164
00:09:16,500 --> 00:09:17,500
Right.
165
00:09:19,500 --> 00:09:20,450
Here's Sophie.
166
00:09:20,500 --> 00:09:24,450
Andy! I thought you said you
might not be able to make it?
167
00:09:24,500 --> 00:09:25,500
Yeah, but I managed to.
168
00:09:27,500 --> 00:09:28,500
Great.
169
00:09:30,500 --> 00:09:31,450
Can I...?
170
00:09:31,500 --> 00:09:32,500
Yeah, yeah.
171
00:09:35,500 --> 00:09:37,450
So...
172
00:09:37,500 --> 00:09:38,450
Peter showed me the article.
173
00:09:38,500 --> 00:09:42,450
Yeah. I'm hopin' other papers might
have photographs of the crash site,
174
00:09:42,500 --> 00:09:44,500
- so we should carry on looking.
- Yeah.
175
00:09:46,500 --> 00:09:49,500
- It's quite a lot to go
through, actually. - Right.
176
00:09:52,500 --> 00:09:55,500
Shall we just crack on with that,
then, or did you want to...?
177
00:09:56,500 --> 00:10:00,450
Oh, no, yeah, I'll... I'll
let you crack on with that.
178
00:10:00,500 --> 00:10:02,500
I've got some shopping to do, so....
179
00:10:05,500 --> 00:10:07,450
- See you later.
- Yep, see ya.
180
00:10:07,500 --> 00:10:09,450
- Cheers.
- Cheers, Lance.
181
00:10:09,500 --> 00:10:11,500
It's Andy.
182
00:10:12,500 --> 00:10:13,500
Andy.
183
00:10:16,500 --> 00:10:19,450
The residents of Whitehall Lodge
are complaining that the parents
184
00:10:19,500 --> 00:10:22,450
are parking their cars in the
residents-only parking bays.
185
00:10:22,500 --> 00:10:25,450
We must make sure that the parents
know they're not allowed to do that.
186
00:10:25,500 --> 00:10:29,450
Similarly, parents are parking
on the yellow zigzag lines
187
00:10:29,500 --> 00:10:31,450
in front of the school and
we must make sure they know
188
00:10:31,500 --> 00:10:35,450
they can't do that, even if
they're just dropping off.
189
00:10:35,500 --> 00:10:38,450
SHE SIGHS: Er, any other business?
190
00:10:38,500 --> 00:10:43,450
- Frances? - Are we allowed
to park on Meadow View Road?
191
00:10:43,500 --> 00:10:47,450
It's just it doesn't say
anywhere it's residents-only.
192
00:10:47,500 --> 00:10:50,450
But they're claiming the same
parking restrictions stretch around
193
00:10:50,500 --> 00:10:55,450
from Church Road, even though
there aren't any, um... signs.
194
00:10:55,500 --> 00:10:57,450
JANET: Well, if there aren't any signs,
195
00:10:57,500 --> 00:11:01,500
- it means there aren't any
parking restrictions! - Right.
196
00:11:02,500 --> 00:11:05,450
- So can I park there?
- No!
197
00:11:05,500 --> 00:11:06,500
Becky?
198
00:11:07,500 --> 00:11:09,500
Sorry, I have to go.
199
00:11:13,500 --> 00:11:15,500
MOBILE PHONE RINGS
200
00:11:17,500 --> 00:11:19,450
Hey.
201
00:11:19,500 --> 00:11:21,450
I've just walked out of
a stupid staff meeting!
202
00:11:21,500 --> 00:11:24,450
Cos they're all a bunch of
small-minded idiots, who can only
203
00:11:24,500 --> 00:11:27,450
talk about how bloody difficult
it is to park their fucking cars!
204
00:11:27,500 --> 00:11:30,450
Bloody hell, you sound
furious. Are you all right?
205
00:11:30,500 --> 00:11:32,500
Hang on, hang on a second, Becks.
206
00:11:42,500 --> 00:11:45,450
SHE SIGHS: It made me realise, Andy,
I really need to get out of here.
207
00:11:45,500 --> 00:11:48,450
I want to talk to you some
more about this VSO thing.
208
00:11:48,500 --> 00:11:50,450
'I think we should do it, the three of us.
209
00:11:50,500 --> 00:11:53,500
'You should hear Martin talking
about it -- it sounds wonderful.'
210
00:11:55,500 --> 00:11:56,450
'Andy?
211
00:11:56,500 --> 00:11:58,450
'Andy?'
212
00:11:58,500 --> 00:12:02,450
Sorry, I got distracted.
I'll see you at home.
213
00:12:02,500 --> 00:12:04,450
SHE SIGHS DEEPLY
214
00:12:04,500 --> 00:12:08,500
- MEXICAN MUSIC PLAYS
- SOFT CHATTER
215
00:12:10,500 --> 00:12:12,500
MOBILE PHONE VIBRATES
216
00:12:14,500 --> 00:12:16,500
- Er, I'd better take this.
- Mm-hmm.
217
00:12:19,500 --> 00:12:20,450
Hello?
218
00:12:20,500 --> 00:12:22,450
All right, it's me. Where are you?
219
00:12:22,500 --> 00:12:23,450
Oh...
220
00:12:23,500 --> 00:12:26,450
I told you -- Screwfix.
221
00:12:26,500 --> 00:12:28,450
Oh, yeah. I forgot.
222
00:12:28,500 --> 00:12:30,450
Have they got a mariachi band playing?
223
00:12:30,500 --> 00:12:33,450
- MEXICAN MUSIC CONTINUES
- Oh, yeah, I know...
224
00:12:33,500 --> 00:12:36,500
They're having a Mexican afternoon.
225
00:12:37,500 --> 00:12:39,450
Er, no, I just...
226
00:12:39,500 --> 00:12:43,450
I forgot to ask whether
you're going to the club.
227
00:12:43,500 --> 00:12:44,450
All right.
228
00:12:44,500 --> 00:12:46,450
I'll see you there.
229
00:12:46,500 --> 00:12:49,450
Oh, can you get me some masonry nails?
230
00:12:49,500 --> 00:12:50,450
Galvanised.
231
00:12:50,500 --> 00:12:53,450
Yeah, OK. Mmm.
232
00:12:53,500 --> 00:12:56,500
I better go -- they're
bringing out the pinata.
233
00:12:59,500 --> 00:13:00,500
Adios.
234
00:13:21,500 --> 00:13:23,450
Hello?
235
00:13:23,500 --> 00:13:25,500
I'm in here.
236
00:13:26,500 --> 00:13:27,500
All right, sweary!
237
00:13:29,500 --> 00:13:30,450
Was I swearing a lot?
238
00:13:30,500 --> 00:13:33,450
Yeah, an unnecessary amount, I'd say.
239
00:13:33,500 --> 00:13:36,450
Oh, God! I was just about to break!
240
00:13:36,500 --> 00:13:39,450
I'd had all that I could take
of their petty parking problems
241
00:13:39,500 --> 00:13:41,450
and their fete, for goodness' sake!
242
00:13:41,500 --> 00:13:43,450
Are you rapping?
243
00:13:43,500 --> 00:13:44,450
No, I think it was just a fluke.
244
00:13:44,500 --> 00:13:46,450
Say something else.
245
00:13:46,500 --> 00:13:47,450
I want a change, Andy!
246
00:13:47,500 --> 00:13:49,450
I want to get out of that school
247
00:13:49,500 --> 00:13:51,450
and try something else, go somewhere else.
248
00:13:51,500 --> 00:13:54,450
- No, none of that really rhymed.
- I wasn't trying to rhyme.
249
00:13:54,500 --> 00:13:56,450
Oh, sorry, what were you saying?
250
00:13:56,500 --> 00:13:58,450
- Doesn't matter.
- BABY FUSSES
251
00:13:58,500 --> 00:14:01,450
They can't fire you, can they, for
storming out of a staff meeting?
252
00:14:01,500 --> 00:14:03,450
I didn't storm, I just left.
253
00:14:03,500 --> 00:14:06,500
We'd really be up shit
creek if you lost your job.
254
00:14:07,500 --> 00:14:10,500
- I want to show you this.
- Don't hand in your notice just yet.
255
00:14:11,500 --> 00:14:13,450
Oh, you'll never guess what I saw.
256
00:14:13,500 --> 00:14:16,450
Looks like Lance has taken our
advice to try internet dating.
257
00:14:16,500 --> 00:14:17,450
I saw him holding hands with a girl,
258
00:14:17,500 --> 00:14:19,450
when he said he was going to the DIY shop.
259
00:14:19,500 --> 00:14:21,450
Yeah, nobody we know?
260
00:14:21,500 --> 00:14:24,450
- No, really young, much
younger than him. - How young?
261
00:14:24,500 --> 00:14:26,450
Twenties.
262
00:14:26,500 --> 00:14:28,450
They were in a cafe. He didn't see me.
263
00:14:28,500 --> 00:14:31,450
And they were... holding hands?
264
00:14:31,500 --> 00:14:33,450
Well, yeah, touching hands, flirting.
265
00:14:33,500 --> 00:14:35,450
He was adamant he wasn't going to try it,
266
00:14:35,500 --> 00:14:37,450
but I don't know how else
he could've met her so fast.
267
00:14:37,500 --> 00:14:39,450
Why don't you just ask him?
268
00:14:39,500 --> 00:14:41,500
Nah, he can tell me when he's ready.
269
00:14:42,500 --> 00:14:44,450
What's that? What's that?
270
00:14:44,500 --> 00:14:46,450
That's a denarius.
271
00:14:46,500 --> 00:14:49,500
Can you say "silver
denarius of Marcus Aurelius"?
272
00:14:52,500 --> 00:14:53,500
Nah.
273
00:14:56,500 --> 00:14:59,450
Here it is. It seems it came
down so straight and so fast
274
00:14:59,500 --> 00:15:01,450
that the hole sort of
filled itself in afterwards.
275
00:15:01,500 --> 00:15:03,450
Always fill in your holes.
276
00:15:03,500 --> 00:15:05,450
Bad taste, Russell.
277
00:15:05,500 --> 00:15:07,450
It was so deep, they just left it.
278
00:15:07,500 --> 00:15:09,450
It looks like it's never been disturbed.
279
00:15:09,500 --> 00:15:11,450
And look -- this tower.
280
00:15:11,500 --> 00:15:12,450
Yeah, that's St Giles.
281
00:15:12,500 --> 00:15:14,450
I can see this tower from
where I park my camper.
282
00:15:14,500 --> 00:15:16,450
Well, that's where we should start.
283
00:15:16,500 --> 00:15:18,450
Can you tell where this
photo was taken from?
284
00:15:18,500 --> 00:15:19,450
It's hard to tell.
285
00:15:19,500 --> 00:15:21,450
Yeah, you can only see
the top of the church.
286
00:15:21,500 --> 00:15:24,450
We should get down there and have a look.
287
00:15:24,500 --> 00:15:26,450
Listen, Terry, um... if we find the site,
288
00:15:26,500 --> 00:15:31,450
I'll need to apply for a licence
of Ministry of Defence to dig it.
289
00:15:31,500 --> 00:15:34,450
I was wondering if the DMDC
could do that on my behalf?
290
00:15:34,500 --> 00:15:36,450
It might look better coming from a club.
291
00:15:36,500 --> 00:15:38,450
No problem at all, mate.
292
00:15:38,500 --> 00:15:40,450
And here's an idea.
293
00:15:40,500 --> 00:15:42,450
What if, when we locate the wreckage,
294
00:15:42,500 --> 00:15:45,450
we have the annual rally on the site, eh?
295
00:15:45,500 --> 00:15:48,450
Get everyone down, more the merrier,
barbecue -- make a day of it!
296
00:15:48,500 --> 00:15:51,450
Can I keep some of the wreckage?
Well, I don't know about that, Hugh.
297
00:15:51,500 --> 00:15:53,450
I'll bring a wheelbarrow.
298
00:15:53,500 --> 00:15:56,450
Hang on a second, guys, this
is not what I had in mind, um...
299
00:15:56,500 --> 00:15:58,450
I want to find the site, pay my respects,
300
00:15:58,500 --> 00:16:01,450
- I don't necessarily want lots of people there.
- We'll cordon it off.
301
00:16:01,500 --> 00:16:04,500
DOOR SQUEAKS OPEN
302
00:16:06,500 --> 00:16:07,450
Hello?
303
00:16:07,500 --> 00:16:08,500
Mr Mayor?
304
00:16:11,500 --> 00:16:14,450
Er, could I have a word, Terry?
305
00:16:14,500 --> 00:16:15,500
Certainly, Mr Mayor.
306
00:16:16,500 --> 00:16:18,450
Well, this is an honour, sir.
307
00:16:18,500 --> 00:16:20,450
How may I be of assistance?
308
00:16:20,500 --> 00:16:22,450
Er...
309
00:16:22,500 --> 00:16:25,450
After a bit of a favour, actually,
from you metal detectors.
310
00:16:25,500 --> 00:16:27,450
Detectorists.
311
00:16:27,500 --> 00:16:31,450
- Beg your pardon? - Doesn't
matter. - Ah. Um, damnedest thing --
312
00:16:31,500 --> 00:16:34,450
I... seem to have mislaid my
ceremonial chain of office
313
00:16:34,500 --> 00:16:36,450
and I thought maybe you
could find it for me.
314
00:16:36,500 --> 00:16:41,450
Absolutely, no problem at all, sir.
I'll get a team on it straight away.
315
00:16:41,500 --> 00:16:44,450
- Russell? - No, no, no, no
need to. Silly to involve him...
316
00:16:44,500 --> 00:16:48,450
Russell runs our new
jewellery retrieval service.
317
00:16:48,500 --> 00:16:50,450
- The mayor here has lost his
chain of office. - His what?
318
00:16:50,500 --> 00:16:53,450
It's a ceremonial chain.
You know, it shouldn't be
319
00:16:53,500 --> 00:16:55,450
too difficult to find -- big chunky thing.
320
00:16:55,500 --> 00:16:59,450
- I'll get Hugh. - No, no,
no, no need to... - Hugh!
321
00:16:59,500 --> 00:17:01,450
The mayor's lost his necklace.
322
00:17:01,500 --> 00:17:05,450
Hugh runs the jewellery
retrieval service with Russell.
323
00:17:05,500 --> 00:17:06,450
They've had a lot of success.
324
00:17:06,500 --> 00:17:10,450
- Had quite a few stories in the local
paper, you may have seen them. - No.
325
00:17:10,500 --> 00:17:12,450
- I have a scrapbook, if
you want to see it? - No.
326
00:17:12,500 --> 00:17:14,450
- Oh.
- Thank you.
327
00:17:14,500 --> 00:17:17,450
I don't want to make a big fuss.
Silly to involve too many people.
328
00:17:17,500 --> 00:17:19,450
So where did you say you lost it?
329
00:17:19,500 --> 00:17:23,450
Ah, somewhere in the long
grass, or in the bushes,
330
00:17:23,500 --> 00:17:26,500
up near the car park by Barnfather Woods.
331
00:17:28,500 --> 00:17:30,450
The car park near Barnfather Woods?
332
00:17:30,500 --> 00:17:33,450
Yes, you know, the one up... up... there.
333
00:17:33,500 --> 00:17:35,450
The place where all the
cars go after dark?
334
00:17:35,500 --> 00:17:38,450
I have no idea what
happens there after dark.
335
00:17:38,500 --> 00:17:42,450
I was, er, walking my dog and, er,
it got caught on a branch and, er,
336
00:17:42,500 --> 00:17:45,450
pinged off into the undergrowth.
337
00:17:45,500 --> 00:17:47,450
Right, well, we'd better
get up there, then.
338
00:17:47,500 --> 00:17:50,450
- In the bushes, on the left-hand
side of the car park. - OK. - Yeah.
339
00:17:50,500 --> 00:17:51,500
As soon as you can.
340
00:17:54,500 --> 00:17:56,500
Um, if we do manage to find it...
341
00:17:57,500 --> 00:18:01,450
- Yes? - All right to
call the local papers down?
342
00:18:01,500 --> 00:18:03,450
- Take a photo?
- For the scrapbook.
343
00:18:03,500 --> 00:18:04,450
No. No.
344
00:18:04,500 --> 00:18:08,450
You see, because, um... Cos
that wouldn't do at all.
345
00:18:08,500 --> 00:18:13,450
I... I was going to make an anonymous
donation to the club if you found it
346
00:18:13,500 --> 00:18:17,450
and I don't like to boast
about my charity work,
347
00:18:17,500 --> 00:18:23,450
so any publicity might prevent
me from making such... a donation.
348
00:18:23,500 --> 00:18:24,450
Do you see?
349
00:18:24,500 --> 00:18:26,450
Yes, I think so.
350
00:18:26,500 --> 00:18:28,500
Fantastic.
351
00:18:29,500 --> 00:18:30,500
There we are.
352
00:18:42,500 --> 00:18:44,500
BIRDSONG
353
00:18:51,500 --> 00:18:55,450
You ever thought about what kind
of dance you'd do if you found gold?
354
00:18:55,500 --> 00:18:58,450
Oh, no. It's bad luck
to practise beforehand.
355
00:18:58,500 --> 00:19:00,450
It has to be spontaneous.
356
00:19:00,500 --> 00:19:02,450
Yep.
357
00:19:02,500 --> 00:19:05,450
Yeah, I've... I've no idea
what'll come out on the day,
358
00:19:05,500 --> 00:19:08,450
- but I imagine it'll be exuberant.
- Not too exuberant, though.
359
00:19:08,500 --> 00:19:11,450
- Remember what happened
to Derek Hoof. - Oh, yeah.
360
00:19:11,500 --> 00:19:14,450
- Dislocated a hip.
- It wasn't even gold in the end, was it?
361
00:19:14,500 --> 00:19:16,500
- Milk bottle top.
- Embarrassing.
362
00:19:34,500 --> 00:19:36,450
- Hi. - Mornin'. - Wotcha. - All right?
363
00:19:36,500 --> 00:19:38,450
Ooh!
364
00:19:38,500 --> 00:19:41,450
Ooh, so... this is it?
365
00:19:41,500 --> 00:19:43,450
The famous metal detector?
366
00:19:43,500 --> 00:19:45,450
It's the CTX, yeah.
367
00:19:45,500 --> 00:19:47,450
She's one of the first in the country.
368
00:19:47,500 --> 00:19:50,450
I've souped her up a bit.
Fitted her with a larger coil.
369
00:19:50,500 --> 00:19:54,450
- I might give her another coat of
wax midway through the season. - Oh.
370
00:19:54,500 --> 00:19:55,500
How does it work?
371
00:19:56,500 --> 00:19:59,450
- What's the on button?
- Well, no, I don't really like to switch her on
372
00:19:59,500 --> 00:20:02,450
so close to the car,
overhead power cables.
373
00:20:02,500 --> 00:20:04,450
- It might overload...
- Look at me! - BEEPING
374
00:20:04,500 --> 00:20:06,450
- I'm going to find some treasure.
- You won't find anything here!
375
00:20:06,500 --> 00:20:10,450
You haven't got it on the right...
No! Hey! You haven't got it on...
376
00:20:10,500 --> 00:20:12,450
It made some noise,
guys, I found something.
377
00:20:12,500 --> 00:20:15,450
It's on the wrong setting. It'll be
a drinks can, so close to the road!
378
00:20:15,500 --> 00:20:18,450
- It's just going to be modern litter.
- Give me a spade. This is great!
379
00:20:18,500 --> 00:20:21,450
- Come on, you don't want to dig it up now.
- What's the reading?
380
00:20:21,500 --> 00:20:23,500
- BEEPING
- 35, is that good?
381
00:20:24,500 --> 00:20:28,450
- No, it's iffy, you know, it
doesn't mean anything. - 35?
382
00:20:28,500 --> 00:20:30,450
- Give me the spade.
- Well...
383
00:20:30,500 --> 00:20:33,500
Well, dig it up, if you like,
but you're wasting your time.
384
00:20:38,500 --> 00:20:42,500
- I tell you what, maybe we should...
- No way, man, this is my treasure.
385
00:20:51,500 --> 00:20:53,450
Coke can.
386
00:20:53,500 --> 00:20:54,450
- Told you, didn't I?
- Yeah, you did.
387
00:20:54,500 --> 00:20:56,450
- I said it was a drinks can, didn't I?
- Unbelievable.
388
00:20:56,500 --> 00:20:58,450
And you didn't listen.
389
00:20:58,500 --> 00:21:00,450
- Unbelievable.
- Ridiculous.
390
00:21:00,500 --> 00:21:03,450
- It's always the virgins.
- Yeah. - It's always the same.
391
00:21:03,500 --> 00:21:05,450
Ones who go out on a first
time think they know best.
392
00:21:05,500 --> 00:21:08,450
- Would he listen?
- What was it? A drinks can!
393
00:21:08,500 --> 00:21:11,450
- It was only ever
going to be junk. - Ha!
394
00:21:11,500 --> 00:21:13,450
Is it true what Sophie's told me --
395
00:21:13,500 --> 00:21:16,450
- that Terry got blown up by a
bomb last year? - Afraid so.
396
00:21:16,500 --> 00:21:19,450
- Threw him 40 foot in the air, he reckons.
- I'd have never believed
397
00:21:19,500 --> 00:21:22,450
the world of metal detecting
was so full of danger and peril.
398
00:21:22,500 --> 00:21:25,450
- Believe it, baby. - Extreme
sport. - Fast and furious.
399
00:21:25,500 --> 00:21:30,450
Speaking of which, hold on to
your hats, ladies and gents,
400
00:21:30,500 --> 00:21:32,500
there's a Saxon round tower and church.
401
00:21:34,500 --> 00:21:35,500
Boom.
402
00:21:41,500 --> 00:21:42,450
Not much to go on.
403
00:21:42,500 --> 00:21:45,450
We can walk in a big circle around
it and look out for features.
404
00:21:45,500 --> 00:21:47,450
Yeah, all right.
405
00:21:47,500 --> 00:21:48,450
Call if you find anything.
406
00:21:48,500 --> 00:21:51,450
Oh... OK.
407
00:21:51,500 --> 00:21:56,450
Well, this is our permission anyway,
so wanna do a couple of hours?
408
00:21:56,500 --> 00:21:57,500
- Go on, then.
- See you in a bit.
409
00:22:03,500 --> 00:22:05,450
I thought you were going to pass out
410
00:22:05,500 --> 00:22:06,500
when he grabbed your detector.
411
00:22:08,500 --> 00:22:11,450
Well, do you have a strum
on Bob Dylan's guitar
412
00:22:11,500 --> 00:22:12,450
- without asking him?
- No.
413
00:22:12,500 --> 00:22:14,450
No!
414
00:22:14,500 --> 00:22:16,450
A man's detector's like his...
415
00:22:16,500 --> 00:22:19,500
- His what? - Woman.
- HE LAUGHS: Woman?!
416
00:22:20,500 --> 00:22:22,450
You know what I mean.
417
00:22:22,500 --> 00:22:25,500
- You don't touch another man's detector.
- Or his woman.
418
00:22:27,500 --> 00:22:28,500
Exactly.
419
00:22:35,500 --> 00:22:39,450
[HE LAUGHS] Did you see
the look on his face?
420
00:22:39,500 --> 00:22:41,450
I thought he was going to cry.
421
00:22:41,500 --> 00:22:44,450
- You shouldn't have taken his detector.
- I couldn't help it.
422
00:22:44,500 --> 00:22:46,450
You don't mess with
Lance's metal detectors.
423
00:22:46,500 --> 00:22:49,450
He's got more than one?
424
00:22:49,500 --> 00:22:52,450
Legend has it, he has a false
bookcase that pulls back
425
00:22:52,500 --> 00:22:54,450
to reveal a secret cabinet full of them.
426
00:22:54,500 --> 00:22:56,450
- HE WHEEZES: Yeah?
- That's what they say.
427
00:22:56,500 --> 00:22:59,450
So weird! Why do you hang out with them?
428
00:22:59,500 --> 00:23:02,450
- They're not weird.
- Yeah, they are! They're freaks!
429
00:23:02,500 --> 00:23:05,450
You're relatively normal compared to them.
430
00:23:05,500 --> 00:23:07,500
I like them. They're my friends.
431
00:23:23,500 --> 00:23:27,500
I'm not too keen on Terry's idea of
holding the rally at the crash site.
432
00:23:28,500 --> 00:23:30,450
It's supposed to be a special moment.
433
00:23:30,500 --> 00:23:35,450
Oh, he means well. It's just, once
he's got an idea in his head...
434
00:23:35,500 --> 00:23:38,450
Could you... speak with him,
try to make him change his mind?
435
00:23:38,500 --> 00:23:40,450
I can try.
436
00:23:40,500 --> 00:23:41,500
Thanks.
437
00:23:46,500 --> 00:23:48,500
I didn't mean to insult your friends.
438
00:23:49,500 --> 00:23:51,450
You're forgiven.
439
00:23:51,500 --> 00:23:53,450
They ARE weird.
440
00:23:53,500 --> 00:23:54,500
- That's why I like them.
- HE LAUGHS
441
00:23:59,500 --> 00:24:01,500
Oh... God!
442
00:24:05,500 --> 00:24:06,500
Who are they?
443
00:24:07,500 --> 00:24:09,450
- SHE SIGHS
- They look like...
444
00:24:09,500 --> 00:24:11,500
Simon and Garfunkel.
445
00:24:14,500 --> 00:24:16,450
Opal Fruits.
446
00:24:16,500 --> 00:24:17,450
Yeah.
447
00:24:17,500 --> 00:24:18,450
TOFFOs?
448
00:24:18,500 --> 00:24:20,500
TOFFOs, good one.
449
00:24:24,500 --> 00:24:25,450
- Spangles?
- Lazy!
450
00:24:25,500 --> 00:24:27,500
Yeah, sorry.
451
00:24:32,500 --> 00:24:36,450
So, Becky said she saw
you with someone, in town.
452
00:24:36,500 --> 00:24:39,500
- Oh, yeah? Who?
- I dunno, a woman.
453
00:24:40,500 --> 00:24:42,450
Hmm.
454
00:24:42,500 --> 00:24:43,450
When?
455
00:24:43,500 --> 00:24:44,500
Tuesday, I think, afternoon.
456
00:24:46,500 --> 00:24:48,450
I dunno, er...
457
00:24:48,500 --> 00:24:50,450
Maybe it's the old lady from downstairs.
458
00:24:50,500 --> 00:24:52,450
No, I think it was someone younger.
459
00:24:52,500 --> 00:24:54,450
Well, Mrs Morris looks young for her age.
460
00:24:54,500 --> 00:24:56,450
- Well, how old is she?
- 93.
461
00:24:56,500 --> 00:24:58,450
Definitely someone younger.
462
00:24:58,500 --> 00:25:00,500
TEXT ALERT
463
00:25:02,500 --> 00:25:04,450
Message from Sophie.
464
00:25:04,500 --> 00:25:07,450
"S&G alert -- heading your way."
465
00:25:07,500 --> 00:25:09,500
What's an S&G alert?
466
00:25:14,500 --> 00:25:15,500
Hello there!
467
00:25:16,500 --> 00:25:18,500
Old friends.
468
00:25:20,500 --> 00:25:21,500
Indeed.
469
00:25:23,500 --> 00:25:24,450
Been a long time, hasn't it?
470
00:25:24,500 --> 00:25:26,450
It has.
471
00:25:26,500 --> 00:25:28,450
A lot of water under the bridge.
472
00:25:28,500 --> 00:25:29,450
- Troubled water.
- Pardon?
473
00:25:29,500 --> 00:25:33,500
Troubled water, that the bridge is over.
474
00:25:36,500 --> 00:25:38,450
We just bumped into
Sophie and her boyfriend.
475
00:25:38,500 --> 00:25:41,450
- I don't think they're a couple.
- Ooh, did I touch a nerve?
476
00:25:41,500 --> 00:25:42,450
No.
477
00:25:42,500 --> 00:25:45,450
They told us about the plane crash.
478
00:25:45,500 --> 00:25:47,450
- They told you?
- He did, yeah.
479
00:25:47,500 --> 00:25:53,450
Plane crash, grandad.
Mmm, very moving story.
480
00:25:53,500 --> 00:25:56,450
- What you getting at?
- But is that the real reason, hmm?
481
00:25:56,500 --> 00:25:58,450
Or is there something else?
482
00:25:58,500 --> 00:26:01,450
Something you're hoping you might find?
483
00:26:01,500 --> 00:26:03,500
- The first one. - Really? - Really.
484
00:26:04,500 --> 00:26:07,450
You don't need metal
detectors to lay a wreath.
485
00:26:07,500 --> 00:26:09,450
Oh, wise words.
486
00:26:09,500 --> 00:26:11,450
HE LAUGHS: Mm-hm!
487
00:26:11,500 --> 00:26:14,450
We wanted to see you,
actually, to thank you.
488
00:26:14,500 --> 00:26:18,450
- We have formed a brand-new
club. - Is that so? - Yes.
489
00:26:18,500 --> 00:26:21,450
You did us a big favour when you absorbed
490
00:26:21,500 --> 00:26:24,450
some of our less-committed
members, allowed us to streamline.
491
00:26:24,500 --> 00:26:27,450
We are now a highly efficient unit
492
00:26:27,500 --> 00:26:30,450
comprising a dozen or
so elite detectorists.
493
00:26:30,500 --> 00:26:32,450
- What you called?
- The Dirt Sharks.
494
00:26:32,500 --> 00:26:35,450
- Ew! Really?
- Yuck!
495
00:26:35,500 --> 00:26:38,450
And what's wrong with the Dirt Sharks?
496
00:26:38,500 --> 00:26:39,450
Sounds a bit, you know...
497
00:26:39,500 --> 00:26:41,450
Aggressive.
498
00:26:41,500 --> 00:26:42,450
Invasive.
499
00:26:42,500 --> 00:26:43,450
I don't think so.
500
00:26:43,500 --> 00:26:45,450
- Predatory.
- Predatory, yes.
501
00:26:45,500 --> 00:26:48,450
Sharks are highly efficient hunters.
502
00:26:48,500 --> 00:26:52,450
And you, with your metal
detectors, are like sharks swimming,
503
00:26:52,500 --> 00:26:54,450
not through water, but through dirt,
504
00:26:54,500 --> 00:26:57,500
and hunting for metal instead of food?
505
00:26:58,500 --> 00:26:59,500
Yeah, exactly.
506
00:27:01,500 --> 00:27:03,450
- Oh, yeah, that's good, that is.
- Yeah, it works.
507
00:27:03,500 --> 00:27:05,450
- It's good. - Well done. - Yeah.
508
00:27:05,500 --> 00:27:08,450
So what, are you, er, looking
to share our permissions,
509
00:27:08,500 --> 00:27:11,450
cos, um, you got two hopes of that --
510
00:27:11,500 --> 00:27:12,450
Bob and no.
511
00:27:12,500 --> 00:27:14,450
HE SNORTS: It's amazing!
512
00:27:14,500 --> 00:27:17,450
Why is it I understand so
very little of what you say?
513
00:27:17,500 --> 00:27:19,450
Cos you're as thick as two short plonks.
514
00:27:19,500 --> 00:27:21,500
- Planks.
- You're welcome.
515
00:27:24,500 --> 00:27:25,500
Come on, Paul.
516
00:27:27,500 --> 00:27:28,500
Don't.
517
00:27:30,500 --> 00:27:32,450
What a mallet!
518
00:27:32,500 --> 00:27:35,500
Why are they here? What
do they think they know?
519
00:27:37,500 --> 00:27:38,450
Phone Sophie.
520
00:27:38,500 --> 00:27:42,450
Make sure Peter knows not
to say anything else.
521
00:27:42,500 --> 00:27:44,450
Tell him to keep schtum.
522
00:27:44,500 --> 00:27:46,500
The sound of silence.
523
00:27:46,550 --> 00:27:51,100
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